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I hope that if you come to this site, you feel at least some reassurance. Life is messy, life isn't perfect, and I love that there is a place, virtual as it is that can acknowledge this. I don't pretend to be perfect or know everything, but I promise that if you ask me a question, or if I see one and take an interest, I will answer it as best I can.Check out my forum here:
http://www.advicenators.com/talkaboutme.php?userboard_id=41589
to post/comment on a topic =]
advice
how do i avoid razor burn/red bumps when shaving my vagina? once the bumps started i waited a week almost two weeks to shave again and they were still there for the most part. how do i get them to go completely away and prevent others from appearing?
Try to shave in the direction of the hair growth; it will be less smooth right after shaving but will irritate your skin less. Use shaving cream if you do not do so already and try moisturizing after shaving - since shaving burn is irritation to the skin, the moisturizer will help calm that down.
If this does not help, it could be that you are prone to razor burn in this region, and may want to try other methods of hair removal. Waxing is probably your best bet; however, if you decide to do this buy a loofa or you will get red bumps of the ingrown hair variety. You could try other methods such as hair removal cream, though in my experience they are less effective against coarser hair, so they may or may not work in the vagina area.
I really love my boyfriend, I really do. I care about him so much... But, I've noticed that we have different future plans. And all he talks about, is being together for the longest time. He says he wants to marry me, and I'm the only person he wants to have a family with. Honestly, that sounds pretty good to me. But, later on... I asked him what he wanted to do with his life in the future. He wants to go to a college in New York, with his music. And me, I want to stay where I am for a while and move out when I'm around 20 - 22 years old, and maybe try to study in California or abroad. When I told him that, he started crying... He said he didn't want to go to New York anymore, and he wanted to be where ever I was. He said I was worth his life if we ever broken up, "I didn't know what was the meaning of happiness, until I got it, I don't want to lose it". He had the most amazing plans ever, he wanted to be a great musician and play in New York. But he gave up on all of that, just to be with me. I don't think I'm worth all of that, he said it was okay... Because he would also like to be a band director and it's still something he loves to do. I feel like he deserves the best, and I'm the one holding him back from it all. What should I do?
You should have a serious discussion with him about your options in a long distance relationship vs. his options for what kind of schools he would want to go to in your area.
Tell him that you would hate to see him pass up these opportunities - that that would make you feel... however you are feeling. Tell him that you guys can still be together if he moves away.
I don't know how far New York City is from you, but I know that you can get bus rides to it from practically anywhere for a dollar, if you book enough days in advance. University also usually has long holidays and opportunities like exchange (so you guys could potentially go somewhere abroad in the same area, or where each other lives). Tell him that he is thinking too black and white. In his head, either he gives up all of his opportunities and stays with you or you guys break up, and this is totally not true. I know of two couples off the top of my head that went to separate cities for university several hours away and then got married. He shouldn't feel like if he chooses to follow his goals, he is giving up you.
After this discussion, try to pry from him his opportunities staying where you are. Depending on where you live, there may be a good music school not too far away... but if there is absolutely nothing available to him, he needs to know this, too.
Lastly, try to communicate with him how sure you are with your own plans. I'm not saying change your own plans because of him, but in the case you are not totally sure what you are doing, if you didn't give him a sense of that he could be sacrificing all this to be in a place where you may or may not be living in future.
If his decision does not change, try not to feel guilty. Remember that ultimately it was/is his choice, and you should feel proud that you did not go out trying to manipulate his choice in any way. Regardless of what happens, try to think of not how you could have screwed up his options, but of how happy you have made him to get him in that crazy-in-love state.
Hey everyone. 19/male here.
My girlfriend (18) and I have been going out for almost 8 months, and so far we have mostly had fun. This has been my first serious relationship and I am completely in love with her. We do fight somewhat often, but we usually manage to work it out and make up. Unfortunately, we both have different goals for both the summer and for the future... she wants to move out by the end of the summer because she can't stand her family and needs to get her own space and be her own person. She says this is a necessity and she has to do it with or without me. I originally told her I was on board, but after really thinking about that I don't know if i'm ready, or if I can take a semester off of college to work to make the money to move out. I've already told her this and she became extremely upset, and we both don't know what to do. We both love each other very much and are extremely attached but have different goals. I know if we broke up we both would be devastated severely. While I have considered it I feel like I could never do it because I care and love her so much. I guess my question is basically, what should I do....?
Paying the funds to move out of the house is a big deal, and she shouldn't be expecting you to do so! If you give her some time to cool off, she will probably realize this; most likely she is having a hard time accepting a sudden change in plans, what with all of these big decisions being made.
Be there in every way you can to support her non-financially. Explain, if you haven't already, the sacrifices you would have to make to help her fund living on her own. And try to counsel her in her other options. For instance, she could always find a roommate and split the cost of rent, if she found a place, or find a friend/someone she knows who shares similar moving-out-for the summer goals.
Coming from my own experience, she is probably seriously overwhelmed by moving out, her ability to do so, and other life changes. There is a strong possibility that her becoming upset has a lot more to do with her fear of not being able to move out/the fact that you changed your mind than you not wanting to move in with her.
Once again, give her space to cool off, and by no means should you think of altering your life plans for this! As for breaking up, I wasn't sure how this entered into the equation, unless she is the one threatening this in which case she is either totally confused or a total asshole. Making a choice to give up certain things to pay to live on your own is big and not something she should expect from you (I'm reiterating here)! Even the choice to move in with someone is something that (I've heard) is big. Someone who tries to get you to do either before you are ready is not someone worth being with in the first place.
But as for you breaking up with her - relax. These are difficult decisions; it's going to be a bit intense for her sorting them through. So step back, let her be frustrated, and once this has calmed down you can go on with your relationship.
~~As a side note, if the only way she can move out is by depending on your money, she probably isn't ready to and her actions towards you start to borderline manipulative.(Once she is more calm) try to point her in the way of student loans, jobs, ect.
Okay So Today Is Easter Sunday And I Didn NOT Sleep At All Because I Was Talking To A Guy Named Anthony All Night And All Morning On MySpace IM And Yahoo Messenger. It Was For Like...More Than 10 Hours. Even Though We Have Never Gone Out With Eachother,We Tell Eachother We Love Eachother So Much All The Time. Then He Tells Me Something That Left Me Motionless And Breathless. He Told Me That He Wanted To Spend The Rest Of His Life With Me. I Was COMPLETELY Amazed By Him. I Didn't Know What To Say But "Oh" And "Really". And If Anyone In My Family Found Out I Was Engaged At 13 Almost 14 To A Guy That's 15 Almost 16...Then They Would Kill Me! But I Love Him Too Much To Let Him Go. Despite The 13 Mile Difference,I'm Going To See Him. I Love Anthony So Much! Tell Me If I Should Wait Or Go For What I Believe In And For Who I'm In Love With(:
"I want to spend the rest of my life with you" is usually a nice statement people say, and by no means indicates engagement (unless he specifically mentioned marriage).
I would meet the guy for a date before letting these feelings totally take you over. Although your relationship could potentially blossom, talking with someone online and being with them in person are two totally different things.
I wasn't totally able to tell from the post, but if you have never seen this guy in person, bring someone with you when you meet him. You never know.
how can i stop being depressed.
All i want to do is sit home
and listen to music..and imagine if i was thinner and prettier..
i havent had a boyfriend in 3 years and my mom told me today that she thinks im wasting away the best years of my life
i dont want to do anything..i think my weight is holding me back im 5'3 and i weight 176 pounds..
i have been gaining weight left and right because i dont want to do anything..yeah sometime i go out with friends and with my family..but right now they went to see the miley cyrus movie..and i didnt want to go..my mom said that i need help and i need to snap out of it..but i dont know what to do..HELP what can i do..i dont think i can afford mental help..!
To be honest, the mental health system really is not the only way to help yourself through down periods or depressions (though it likes to think it is). I am not advocating "snapping out of it", but trying out lifestyle/ thought changes that may help. A lot of depression is caused by stuff you do in your own life that makes you feel worse, and a lot of what the "cure" is is figuring out the things you do that hold you back, and slowly, painstakingly reverse these habits.
For example, in your comment you seem to be judging yourself pretty harshly for not having had a boyfriend. A good way to deal with this would be to accept the thought (ie, yeah, it does suck), but to not judge yourself about it (ie, most people don't have boyfriend's their whole life, It's not like I need a bf to be an awesome person, ect).
As another example: your mom tells you you are wasting the best years of your life. This sounds like something you should probably not internalize as all it does it make you feel bad about feeling bad, which really is not helping anyone. (Besides, there is a body of thought larger than your mom that maintains being a teenager usually kindof sucks).
In my personal struggles with depression, I have found that I tend to place unfair expectations on myself and think thoughts that really don't help (ie I'm sad... omigod I'm sad... omigod I have depression again this is so horrible I am never going to get out of this this I will be an eighty year old woman with depression!, ect), and question the validity of my thoughts. I have found that the best way to get "better" so to speak is to talk back to myself (in my head) when I have a thought that is not helping anything at all, and try to be more accepting of my own feelings. I have been through years of therapy, and these have been the few things that help. Also, the book "Mind Over Mood" is a little awkwardly written, but the concepts I found really helpful, if you want to check it out.
As for the weight: have you tried some kind of gradual exercise regimen? Like joining a sports club at school or something? Exercise creates endorphins, which make you happy.
Remember, though - losing weight will not make everything better, and having a boyfriend is nice but won't make your mood suddenly okay. But self love will, along with some hard work and care. I wish you luck.
[In terms of affording mental health - therapists are sometimes covered by a plan that your parents may have and psychiatrists are usually covered by health insurance. If all else fails there are ways to get that traditional "depression" help from other means - pastors, family doctors, guidance councilors, social workers and the like all have the ability to perform therapy services... there are also some online options, if you look for them.]
if you have butt sex are you still a virgin?
"Butt sex" is sex just like vaginal sex is sex. In this situation the answer would be no.
ok i have been dating my boyfriend for a little over a month n hes my very first boyfriend. im 16 by the way. yeah and my friend, lets call him TT told me some thigns about him that make me feel a bit nervous. im kinda not sure if i want to have sex before marraige but i definatly want to wait till after high school n TT knows that but idk if my boyfriend does. n TT was talking to me n he told me that my boyfriend once told him that life is about banging as many bitches as you can. that makes me realy nervous about if he'd pressure me into doing something i dont want to and if he'd cheat on me n hes reaaly dating me for only one thing. i dont even know if TT is telling teh truth, he did have a chrush on me and he was kinda heartbroken when he found out i got a boyfriend so im wondering if maybe hes only telling me that to ruin my relationship or is he realy trying to keep me from making a huge mistake. please give me ur advice its very much appreaciated.
TT could be saying what he said for any number of reasons. As well, since you were not actually there, what he said could be misconstrued (ie - he may have been joking, not meaning what he was saying, ect.).
Don't worry about him pressuring you before he actually does. Also be aware that if he ever did ask you for sex, the situation would probably be you telling him no, and that being the end of it. So far you have no reason to be making judgments about anything relating to your bf's wants/needs.
If this is something that is bothering you, you should bring it to your boyfriend's attention. "I know this is paranoid, my guy friend thinks you want lots of sex, he's probably wrong, right?" (half joking). Or just casually bring up sex, and tell him that you are fairly sure you are waiting until marriage.
Likely he's just as unsure about sex as you are, and dealing with it by making wisecracks to his friends in the meantime.
Like a lot of people..i don't know what the hell i want to do with my life. I'm a senior in high school and I'll be heading off to college soon. I'm gunna be going to a community college for two years, then transferring to a 4 year college(for financial reasons). i mean, i have an okay view of what i want to do. I've always been infatuated (that's right, big word) with movies. ever since i was little I've wanted to make them, to produce them. the question is, what should be my major? film and editing? i don't even know if there's a class that teaches me how to be a producer. idk. any questions with my question..I'll answer. boy, that was confusing huh. haha
kthxbye :]
What you are interested in is film production, or, if you are also interested in the camera work, your major would probably called cinematography.
There are plenty of places that have strong film programs (for example, Ryerson in Canada and a whole bunch in San Francisco in the States). Try google searching and see who offers your program, or at least checking out the community colleges for info.
On the financial situation, you may want to consider financial aid and the like before making a decision primarily based on funds. You might also think about options such as going to school part time/working part time as it would take around the same number of years to get a degree.
ok so here's the deal... i like this guy in my grade and i see him everyday. I really like him and i don't even know him! i don't know if hes nice i don't know if he has a girlfriend and heck! i don't even know his last name... two qustions...
1.) is it bad to like somebody u have never met?
2.) What should i do?
It's not bad to like someone you've never met. It might be awkward for you, sure, but it's quite normal and happens all of the time.
The main thing to do now is get to know him. Linger outside the classroom or whatever and start some sort of frivolous conversation, for example, start talking about what you think of the course.
If all goes well with you initiating the mini conversations (and online things like facebook/myspace/msn can help with this), you will know him well enough to know if you actually like him or not, or be in the position to either ask him out or become more acquainted to him as a friend.
hey im 13/f and i have a boyfriend of 1 year. i love him so much! And we got talkin about sex, and he said that since ima virgine, he would be super carefull with me. and then i told him im scared of ending up pregnat, he said we wont have sex untill i'm ready but i really want to, we were going too hang out tonight at ten so whom ever reads this please give me some advice, cuz i need it. P.s I really wanna wiff him i just dont knoe what ta dp.
Love,
Lil Ms. Cunfuzzled
-Use a condom, and make sure to use it properly. By this I mean don't use two at once, make sure to roll it on when he's hard, leaving a little bit of room at the tip and then pinching the tip part. Always use lubricated latex condoms. They are 98% effective against STDs and pregnancy, and the non-effective part is usually due to people using them improperly
-Buy some other kind of protection, like VCF (vaginal contraceptive fluid) that is usually found in the same isle as the condoms. This will make sure that, in case something goes wrong with the condom, you probably won't get pregnant.
-Make sure that you are relaxed, turned on, and very wet before he enters you. Otherwise it will be uncomfortable for you, and who wants that the first time?
-Make sure that you are both communicating before and during sex. You don't necessarily have to be having a full out conversation about the deed, but it will be better for both of you if you do things like moan (or whatever you usually do) when it feels good, and telling him to stop if he does anything that hurts.
Most of all, don't let anyone shame you for having sex. Many people have different opinions about the topic, but they don't know you as well as you know yourself.
well i was just wondering how like everyone says that if you don't fight or have alot of bad times then its not a real relationship? but like i really like this guy, we're not technically dating but we both really like each other and i think he's gonna ask me out soon the next time we hang out, but we don't fight at all and we have so much fun together but we've never been in a fight yet. so my question is, is that normal? does it mean our relationship won't last because its not real? i kinda want a fight to come though because i want to see if he will still stay with me but i dont wanna like pick a fight, what should i do? thankss
16/f
You don't have a real relationship because you don't fight, you don't have one because he hasn't asked you out yet! One step at a time =].
As for this fight business, no, creating a fight won't make it "real". Basically, the statement refers to how two people in a relationship who care about each other and spend enough time together usually will hurt each other in little ways without realizing it. Not that it's anyone's fault, but spending a lot of time with someone else with different ways of thinking and expressing themselves almost guarantees this. As these issues arise, there are three options: you pretend you aren't hurt, you break up with the other person, or you talk it out and deal with the problem.
Having a fight in this case doesn't have to be a fight in the traditional sense (you know, screaming, throwing furniture). Ideally, there will be some way of releasing the frustration in a loving way (ie. "It bugs me when you ________, and I feel like you don't care about me when you _______"). Ideally, there is enough communication so you have a little "fight", no one gets hurt, and you both learn how to deal with issues that come up in the relationship so no one gets hurt.
Right now you are getting along and happy and this is a GOOD thing. Eventually, though, if you date for long enough, you may find you have your little issues. Now, I don't recommend yelling at him, respectfully telling him is usually a better way, but you will find that the bumps in relationships do happen, and you can deal with them when they come.
hi im 13
i know this is a weird question but is it normal for guys my age to masturbate
i dont do it really often but wen i do it i just feel good inside it just feels so nice and stuff
i try not to do it cause i think its bad but is it really? i need to know
is it just weird for a 13 year old male to do this kind of stuff?
No, its not weird. It's pretty normal, harmless, and even considered healthy by some people.
Me and this guy who have been hooking up for a while had dry sex last night. I was in my underwear (lace thong), and he was in some briefs. He mighttt not have bee wearing it he might have taken it off by then (I later gave him a handjob, but nothing farther).
MYY underwear never came off, but I have this huge fear of getting an STD, so is there any possibility I could've gotten one if he had one? I don't think he has one, but what if he did? That would suckk...
Also you cant get an STD through a hj right?
PS theres NO chance of me getting pregnant. I'm also on the pill.
If your thong was really sheer and lacy, there is a chance for an STD to leak through. However, because most STDs are only transferred when either your genitals or the body fluids have direct contact, I would say you will not get an STD (this is me assuming you have some sort of cotton or other material without holes over your vagina).
If you gave him a handjob, the only way to get an STD would be to wipe yourself with the fluids that got on your hands. Which I am assuming you did not do.
As for pregnancy, as the user below suggested, the pill is not 100% effective, however it is at least 99% effective, which is fairly close, and this number increases if you take it more and more consistently every day.
By the way, if you are really worried about STDs, a good idea would be to get him checked out at some sort of clinic. Once he is tested, and you are still on the pill, there will be a lot less to worry about. As well, whenever he is without pants it might be a good idea to put a condom on him, just in case.
btw before you read this im 13/f
ok i added this boy on my cousin's myspace.
so then he messaged me "your hott would you fuck me. ?
and i go" why.?" and he goes cuz "your hot and i will definatly fuck you."
than i go " are you virgnin?"then he goes "yeah i am.. if you r i would make you not a virgin.=]"
and i go "yeah" then jokingly i go "okk. good. "
he goes" how big do you like them" and i go i d ont know and he goes "well mine is 7inces. thats big enough for you baby =]" and i dont know him. my cousin knows him .
is he joking.? would he know i was joking.?
I wouldn't get worked up about this. For the most part, he is either joking or typing down comments without really thinking straight. It sounds offensive, but it's actually harmless. The guy has just hit puberty, the idea of having sex is new and exciting to him. He's trying to hit on you not because he actually wants to hit on you or have sex with you, but because the whole thing is new and exciting to him and so he's trying out the whole player persona-thing mostly to dare himself - he probably likes the whole ridiculousness of it.
Either that or he has a twisted sense of humour.
To respond you can either:
1) message him back in a joking put down-y way. Get in on his sense of humour.
eg. "7 inches?? thats tiny man ive seen way bigger"
The downside is that you may feel uncomfortable doing this.
2) Stop replying to his messages, stop reading his messages, and block him. You don't actually know this guy, so you have lost nothing by doing this except a really annoying, slightly offensive myspace contact.
I would personally do option 2. Remember that just because your cousin has him on myspace does not mean that he actually knows him (or knows him well); a lot of people add random classmates to these kinds of websites, or even people that they don't know at all.
He's likely harmless, but if he's bothering you in any way, don't feel bad at all about dropping him as a contact.
I'm 14, my cousin is 19.
I fancy my cousin, and he fancies me back. But we live at opposite sides of the world, which is the only thing that is stopping us from having sex.
We have cyber sex with each other almost every day. And I have no idea where this is leading me. I'm visiting them coming December...
If you were in this situation, what would you do?
Please help...!
This situation is a little taboo in some areas, not so much in others... depending on which, and depending on your family, you should probably have some sort of discussion with your cousin about what to do. Do you plan on telling your family? Do you want to have sex with him, or are you considering some kind of relationship?
It can be okay to have a casual internet sex relationship with someone as long as you don't actually have feelings for them. You should probably ask yourself (and your cousin) honestly how you feel about each other before you do anything else.
If you both want to keep it casual, you should best hide what you have from family (especially if they would not approve). Them finding out would complicate the situation. As well, sleeping with him in this case would not be a good idea, as you are after all there on a family trip, and on the off chance anyone found out the whole thing would go from a little uncomfortable to hugely awkward in short amounts of time.
If you want a relationship, the visit would be a good time to tell family that you are interested in each other. Liking one's cousin is, in fact not that unusual, legal, and makes some sense as you have probably not grown up together. Once again, family finding out about the sex is always a possibility, so I would suggest against it. However if you DO end up there, make sure that you above all use protection - condoms, vaginal contraceptive film, ect.
Whatever happens, make sure that you have thought about it and discussed everything with him so you both know what you want out of the cyber sex/ relationship. The fact that you are family may make things more complicated, but that doesn't mean that things won't work out.
Good luck =]
What is a good name for a place selling candles, soap, and jewelry (all handmade)? p.s. my first name is Tina.
No submission too silly! Thanks!!!
Tina's boutique
Incense
Hey,
Ok so the issue is a guy that im seeing is coming down to visit this weekend, and its going to be the first time we spend any real time together b/c he is a college student in Ann Arbor, MI and im a high school student in OH. At 21, he is 4 years older than me. I have never made out with a guy before, and I'm nervous that I won't do it right or that I'll disappoint him. He has a lot more experience in all that stuff than I do and I just want to make sure that he isn't let down. Guys, any advice on what you like from a girl when making out, or anyone, tips for how to do it effectively? Thanks a lot and if someone could respond asap I'd appreciate it!!!
As he has likely made out before, being 21, you're in pretty good shape as you can let him lead (at least, at first), and there is not that much pressure for you to know what you are doing.
Before anything happens, you'll have to flirt and get more used to being around each other. Before kissing it's important to break the "touch barrier". Hand on the shoulder, leaning in when saying something (anything), being relaxed, and just generally being playful and touchy-feely is a good way to create a kissing environment.
When the actual kiss comes, usually you wait for some kind of signal. Usually this is a gradual mutual signal, like when two people seem interested and slowly move their heads closer together. You want to pay attention to his head tilt at this point. You should tilt your head in the opposite direction as his for lips to easily touch.
What happens next varies on the individual. A basic technique you could follow would be to "close in" so to speak with your mouth slightly open, gently closing it onto his lips. This is a good way to start as it can progress into either open or closed mouth kissing. To avoid nose bumping, a good position to get into is to have your head tilted (once again, note the head tilt) so that the top and bottom of your lips are on the corners of his. Head on-kissing can always work, but it's harder to make out in that position.
Once you are kissing, that "making out" part is where it really depends on the individual. Make sure to stick to your comfort level, and to be relaxed so you can respond to what he's doing. If you have no real preference, you can see what he does and imitate it if you like it. There are a lot of ways to make out, with and without tongue. For specific technique, there is no "right" or "wrong" thing to do. Generally, however, making sure your breath is fresh, swallowing while kissing to avoid slobbering, and remembering to breathe are good things to do.
Good luck this weekend, and overall, don't think too too much about the kissing. Remember that technique doesn't matter as long as you are enjoying each other's company and having a good time together.
I've been friends with my best friend since I was in 10th grade. I'm now 23, so that's 8 or so years of friendship. Obviously, he's my best friend and we do everything together. He used to come over to my house everyday and we'd hang out and talk. Then all of a sudden, he got a girlfriend and he never calls me, when she's around. She lives in Mexico and she comes up to see him for two months and then goes home for two weeks. The thing that irritates me is I won't hear from him for two months. And then as soon as she leaves, he's on the phone with me asking if he can come over, or what I'm doing because he wants to hang out..
Basically, I'm annoyed that he can't call me when she's over. And I don't really know what to do..
Tell him how you feel. (ie, "I miss you when your girlfriend comes over, because I feel like I never see you then).
If it makes you feel any better, him spending all of his time with his girlfriend won't last long. With time he will most probably start to get the friends/work/girlfriend balance right, and start seeing his friends (and you) more often.
alright. i have a bit of a situation with a friend of mine....we're both 16. and girls.
so basically, she's grown to think of herself as a princess. like no joke. she stares in the mirror 24/7..she thinks she's the best poet in the world, she thinks every guy wants to woo her and sweep her off her feet. she is pretty, i admit. but her arrogance is getting to everyone she knows.
this is a basic day with her:
friend: I look SO beautiful today! *flips mirror open* *brushes hair, applies mascara, blows a kiss, smiles*
me: Yeah you do..
friend: psh, I know I do.
that's basically how an average day is. and i've taken it for this whole year..i havent said a word. but now im just sick of it. i dont want to be her friend anymore. the problem is, we have many mutual friends. but theyre getting sick of her too. we already got into a fight. and it was her fault. but i apologized ...three times..so she'd talk to me. this was her reply after my sincerest apology: "i appreciate the effort. but i cant talk to you just yet." she acts like a motherfucking princess who cant forgive! how am i supposed to respond when she DOES forgive me ? [for no reason] i dont wanna take the blame and make it seem like she's a princess and everyone deserves to be forgiven by her! what should i doo? :(
When she is willing to forgive you, you could say something like "I'm sorry I was mean to you/ blew up at you, but sometimes I feel annoyed when you are always complimenting yourself about your looks in front of me." (substitute "annoyed" with "jealous" if you want to flatter you. In the mean time, stop apologizing until she comes back to you. It saves a lot of effort and will make her "forgive" you faster as she will have less fun moping around being upset.
By the way, the best way to get someone to stop doing anything is to act supremely bored and disinterested when they do it. If you've told her how annoying her arrogance is and she doesn't get it, the best thing to do is the next time she looks herself in the mirror, turn away and talk to someone else, or stare blankly and disinterestedly at a wall. Telling you how beautiful she is will become less fun, and she will stop.
does anyone know where you can train as a lifeguard?
You need to earn your bronze medallion and bronze cross to take an NLS course, the course that certifies you to be a lifeguard. You also need to be sixteen. Contact a local pool, or, as sima said, an organization that contains a pool, and see if they offer the course(s) you will need.