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Hi, I'm Courtney. I want to become a pre-school teacher :] and I've been though a whole heck of a lot, so feel free to ask me anything, i'll do my best to help ! xxo."i refuse to sink."
advice
can i bleed again during sex after losing virgine.
It depends on the girl, but usually, no you won't bleed again. Once it is popped, it's popped.
Good luck ! xxo
Hi my period starts on 1st of December and it run up to 7th December. then we had intercourse up to 11th without protection.. and now today is 5th Jan 2013 I did not get my period.
I got married recently and my period cycle is 25 days. please help. I am really in trouble.
Anytime you don't use protection you are at a VERY high risk of pregnancy.. I would invest in a pregnancy test ASAP or go to a doctor and get a more legitimate pregnancy test (store bought ones aren't always the most accurate) .. You should always use protection ! It's not 100% on preventing pregnancy but no protection is a gamble.
Good luck ! xxo
So ive been meeting this lad for nearly a year nw. I really like him and ive asked him to go out with me but he says no because he isnt a happy person and doesnt want to hurt me. Ive tried to stop meeting him but I cant. What should I do?
I know that you like him but you can't force him to go out with you. Give him some time and maybe he'll come around, but for now you have to do what's best for him, and ultimately you, and leave him alone. He old you straight up that he doesn't want to be with you because he's an unhappy person.. All you can do is be there for him, tell him you'll wait for him (if you want to) for a little bit but not forever, that you could make him happy, but that you'll let him be until (if) he ever comes around to the idea of being with you.
Hope I helped ! Good luck, xxo
hello,
i have been dating my bf for 10 months now and when we were first together i fell for him very fast. without really getting to know each other we kind of jumped in a relationship. However, now i feel that everything he does kind of makes me mad, i dont think i made him work hard enough for me. he doesnt bring me flowers or take me out. things seem like theyve faded, im not as attracted to him and he gets on my nerves very easily. when i go out with the girls i love the fact that i can just forget about him and go have harmless flirtation with guys. i love my bfs family and friends, they mean so much to me and i really dont want to lose them. I still love him but the spark isnt there i feel and he has a full time job so in the nights he wants to hang out but im going to school and i need to do my home work and he doesnt understand. i think i am over thinking everything so i need someone elses help ! please!!!
thanks
You fell out of love.
You still love him but you are no longer IN love with him. There is a very big difference between the two terms.
Even though you still care about him and love him, you don't feel the Ashe way you used to. If you want what's best for the both of you, you should highly consider ending it and just remaining friends. I understand how you feel, this happens a lot. You're not alone.
All of the signs are there: he annoys you easily, gets on your nerves for doing like nothing wrong, you're not physically attracted to him like you used to be, you innocently flirt with guys but its still flirting which means your boyfriend is not on your mind, you want to forget about him when you're out with friends, being with him feels like a chore, the spark is gone, etc.
you know what you have to do because its what's fair to both of you. Right now, you probably just need to experience different people and who knows what can happen in the future. But yes, this relationship, right now is toxic. And I know you don't want to lose his family, so just keep things civil, don't let it get out of hand. But put yourself in his shoes, if this was turned around, wouldn't you want him to break up with you rather than string you along and be miserable ?
Good luck ! Hope I helped, xxo.
I think I might be close to getting my period. I have cramps above my peepee (vagina) and my stomach has been bubbly , especially after I eat. And I am starting to have minor headaches . Is that signs of a period coming.
it could be.. how old are you ? if you are 12 or older, these could definitely be signs. does your back ache ? does your chest (breasts) hurt (like, are they sore when you touch them?) are you hungry alot ? do you feel bloated? do you have a lot of discharge (white or clear liquid) coming out of your vagina ? if so, you will probably be getting it soon, but dont freak out ! just let an adult know, get some pads or tampons ready (whichever you feel more comfortable with) and relax. also, try taking midol or advil/tylenol to help with the pain.
good luck ! :] xxo.
same guy lol. what would you do if you had an ex that things ended very badly and he tried reaching out to you again to apoligize?
Well, that's happened to me.. My most recent ex still tries to screw with me and my relationship, he's still very immature and I honestly don't ever think about him and I don't even hate him because hes nothing to me. But I guess it really would depend on the situation. I'm in an unbelievably great relationship with a fantastic guy and I love him :) so i guess i have my ex to thank for that one or id still be stuck with a psycho. but I guess if he ever did reach out to me, id hear what he had to say cause I'd be the bigger person but it doesn't mean I'd respond, he doesn't deserve my forgiveness. However, I don't know your situation, so I can't really say what your ex would do, every situation is different, I can help you if you explained more...
i was the guy about my ex and how i still miss her when i see her, we dated for 2 years and now we dont even talk, at all. i feel like if i try and reach out to her she will just tell me to leave her alone. i see her all the time driving around town but im afraid to call her or try and reach out to her. im not real sure what i should do, i have a girlfriend and for some reason i only think about my ex and she alwsys comes up in conversation and my friends say i get all happy when her name comes up, even if my new girlfriend is with me. i wish i could turn back time and fix what happened but im not sure what i should do. any help?
2 years is a long time.. Why do you feel like she will tell you to leave her alone if you ever try to reach out to her ? I think you should try.. You obviously feel strongly about this, and it will just bother you until you try.. Like, the not knowing what could have happened if you did.. You should ease your mind. Life is abbot taking risks.. What bad could come from just talking to her and apologizing for what happened ? Nothing. It will make you feel better. Let me know what you decide !
Will I go blind if I masterbate to much?
Nope.
im so afraid to talk to my ex again, he ended it 3months ago after nearly a year and we didnt really end on good terms..
I just wish he knew what i feel for him, i ran back to him like 3 times and he rejected me he said that the best thing was for us to forget eachother even though its not easy.
I don't even know if i should? maybe its a bad idea, i dont want to humiliate myself again..
also i feel that i want to start dating but i dont know if im actually ready.
by the way im 18/female
It is not worth it.
youre still so young and you have your whole entire life ahead of you.. which includes the TONS of guys out there. hes not the only guy on the planet, and hes not the only guy you will ever like again, i promise you that, but you have to give yourself a chance to find someone else.
If hes saying that its best you both just stay away from eachother, than hes saying it for a reason. He doesnt want to be with you.. and thats not to say in the future at some point, you both wont cross paths again and reignite the flame you once had, but you cant hold your breath for that "maybe" moment either.
I know this isnt what you want to hear, but he isnt waiting around for you, and hes not coming back to you over and over again. hes also not trying to contact you, and he keeps, as you say, rejecting you.. than hes making himself very clear to you.. his feelings are no longer there. he even told you straight up that you need to forget him and that he needs to forget about you. and that doesnt mean you wont ever corss his mind, he cant just erase you, but he doesnt want to be with you.
you deserve to find someone who WANTS to be with you and makes a valiant effort to do so. dont keep going back to him, push yourself farther and farther away. talk to other guys. occupy your time with friends and family.. have fun. like i said, youre young and you will find someone else. i know right now you dont think youre ready, but give it time, and patience.. you will be ready in no time.
break the pattern, try for someone new and youll be much happier :) i promise, trust me. xxo.
I need you guys to help me.I have a boyfriend who I love very much;he's my baby and the reason I'm happy everyday. Then,why do I feel attracted to other men as well?Since me and my boyfriend have very good sex.Last week,I was at my best friend's house and when he approached me to hug me,I felt sexually aroused when he pressed his body against mine:( This isn't correct.I know it,but I just don't know how to make it stop.Help?Thanks!!
Just because you love your boyfriend, doesnt mean that being in a relationship right now with him is the best thing for you. If you're thinking about having sex with other guys, especially a friend of yours that you have physical contact with, than you need to re-evalutae what you want right now. I know that you WANT to want your boyfriend, but you cant force your feelings towards other guys to just go away. You might need to just go on a break for now, and test out the waters with other people, get it out of your system, really get to know yourself and explore other options or other feelings you are having. because lets put it this way, if your boyfriend was in your position and he had these feelings towards one of his female friends or any girl in general, you wouldnt be happy.. but you also wouldnt know, and i think thats the part that would hurt you the most. You need to be honest with him, because im sure thats how you expect him to be with you, right ? and if you love him, youll love him enough to do this for him.. maybe even love him enough to let him go. Putting yourself in his shoes, its probably in his best interest if you just break it off for now.. not saying that it has to be concrete, but wandering eyes and feelings are never a good thing in a relationship, especially keeping it a secret because sooner or later it will surface, and then everything will be a big mess. You definitely dont want that.
Maybe you could even talk to him about it, or talk about your feelings. maybe hes not pleasuring you in a physical way anymore.. so you could try different things in that respect (and talk to him about this)
there is no quick fix to this, you really have to sit down, take a deep breath, and think about why youre thinking these things about other guys. youre not a horrible person, and youre not TRYING to hurt him, because I can tell its hurting you that youre even thinking these thoughts. just dont act upon them unless youre single. you could wait a couple weeks to see if these feelings just go away and it was a temporary phase, but if not, I would definitely talk to your boyfriend about how youre feeling or just ask for a break. theres not much else you can do sweetie, i know its rough, but youve got to do whats right for not only you, but your boyfriend too.
good luck ! xxo.
14/f
I was wondering if guys like it when you kiss them very very softly .. I know if I was a guy it would tempt me to kiss harder
Also do they like it when your thumb rubs their hand while your holding hands?
yes and yes.
if hes attracted to you.. he'll like any sort of contact with you.
xxo.
Hi,
I'm still going though the last week of my life. I'm not going to stop and think twice about it. Today is Monday and I have a few days to go
My life has no purpose and meaning. I never had any serious relationship and I have no idea what love is.
I've turned to church but I don't think anybody understand what I'm going through.
I wake up every day going through life like a wombie. I can't talk to anyone because I can't really explain it or when I tried very hard to put words on my pain, people think that I have no real reason to feel this way.
I have people telling me that what I'm feeling is not normal in a sense that I should be ashamed of feeling the way I do.
And to be honest with you I sometimes do. I feel ashamed of not being happy of not trying hard enough to make myself happy. I told them I'm lonely, they said go out and find yourself a guy like it was easy to do or like I didn't want to do. It's not easy for some people to open up about their feelings.
I feel like I don't belong to the world, like there is no place for me anywhere. I promise you if anything bad will happened, it will happened to me. I always say or do the wrong thing that get everyone hate me. People think I'm weird and I must be an idiot. I graduated from high school when I was 15. I have a bachelor degree which I got when I was 21 (because I moved to the US and I had to learn the language).People think I'm stupid because of my accent.
I'm not from here and I feel like I don't belong, back home I didn't feel like I belonged either.
It doesn't make sense to myself, I don't know what the hell is wrong with me but I'm not ok. I don't know how to put words on my pain.
But I'm done trying to fit in into this world which may not wants me anyway.
Don't make a permanent decision for a temporary problem.
And I know what you're probably thinking, "it's not a temporary problem, it's been like this for a long time." well, it is temporary. I can't tell you when its going to get better because that is up to you.. It all depends on you. Why take your life away when you have so much to live for ? and I know, you're probably now thinking, "she doesn't get it, I have nothing to live for." well, you're wrong. You have the life you were given to live for. You have the beating heart inside of your chest to live for. You have your family to live for. The future to live for. Everything. You have everything if you're still alive because without life, you have nothing. You deserve everything and you deserve to live your life. Screw what other people think of you.. They don't know you, but if you kill yourself, noone will have the chance to actually get to know you. I also think you should give some people more benefit of the doubt. Don't just expect people to think you're weird, let them prove you wrong, because I promise, somewhere down the road, someone will. I PROMISE. Believe me. And I'm not saying this stuff to you just because, I'm saying it to you because even though I don't know you, you didn't have to write this on here. You didn't have to submit anything on this site, but that just proves that you are meant to LIVE because even though you don't see it, you still have some fight left in you, so be a fighter. Dont just give up. Get strong. Let all of this crap make you stronger and be an example to other people who are feeling the way you do now that they can overcome these obstacles and that suicide is not the right option. You can do this. You are meant to live here on this earth. Don't leave because people suck, be one less person who doesn't suck. Stay.
Also, keep in mind that you can always get a therapist r call the national suicide prevention hotline. You're never alone.
xxo.
I have a bump right by my vagina hole it just appeared after i shaved . It doesnt hurt && doesnt itch its just there how cani make it go away ?
It could be an in grown hair.
Unless your sexually active, then it could be an STD. if this is the case, than go see a doctor.
But, if you're not than it's most likely just an ingrown hair or shaving irritated it. Maybe try being more gentle when you shave, you could've irritated it. It should go away in a few days, just don't shave over there for a little. If it doesn't go away in a few days (like maybe a week) go see a doctor. But I'm sure you're fine.
Good luck ! xxo.
me & my boyfriend been togather for almost a year , i realy love him . im suppr compfortable with him . he wants to hae sex. and im nervous about it .
idk why . maybe i feel to young(im not 13 or anything) ? or my parents will find out . or it will hurt . and im super scared of getting pregnate . but forsure we will use protection and hes not presuuring me ? i make the descison that i will do it , but thenwhen we r alone i chicken out . what should i do ?
I totally understand what you're going through.
Sometimes, you have to just conquer your fears and go for it. You've been with him for a while, so you know that he is dedicated and committed to you, so that's always a big relaxer, but what you need to do is sit down with your boyfriend and have a legit, serious, long talk about why you're afraid to have sex. Don't hold back. It'll make you feel 100 times better if you let him know about EVERYTHING. Tell him you're scared it will hurt, if you want to stop he will, you're scared of the consequences that could occur like pregnancy and your plan, god forbid, if it does happen. Talk to him about how you feel ready but you chicken out, and m sure he will ease your mind. Communication will definitely help you a lot. But also do some research on sex and people's first times ... Even though everyone is different, it's the unknown that scares us the most, so knowing other people's stories kinda helps. But talking to him will most def help :) even if you have, keep talking so you can reassure yourself and then you'll be more likely to go through with it.
Good luck ! xxo.
hi! I am 18/f years old and i was reading your column and you seem like a really level headed girl so i was wondering if you could answer some questions for me so i can compare it to my relationship (i dont know if im in the right one) thank you for your time!
1. do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend? if you do, how long have you known this person
2. do you think relationships have flaws?
3. do you get angry easily with people?
4. how do you know a relationship is the right one?
5. why do i feel like i cannot trust my boyfriend when he never gives me a reason not to trust him? can i fix this?
6. i want my boyfriend to treat me like a princess, and i want him to buy me lots of stuff and pay for everything.. is this wrong? how do i get him to do this?
THANK YOU!
sure ! :]
1. yes, i do have a boyfriend. uhm, I've known him for what feels like FOREVER haha, but its been like five months, give or take.
2. yes ! no relationship is perfect. NO RELATIONSHIP. flaws are aprt of life. we're all human, sooo itd be beyond abnormal if my relationship didnt have flaws. I mean, theres not even a lot, but everyone has baggage.
3. hmmmm, not really. i mean, i have a short temper with some things, but for the most part, im pretty chill.
4. you just know. like, after a while of being with the person, its not a question you ask yourself. it just comes naturally and easily and it just feels right. like, if it felt wrong, youd know. and if you have to constantly question how you feel, than its not the right relationship for you. (besides the factor of abuse and all of that if there is any, than GET OUT. its not right on any level.)
5. maybe you have trust issues. i can relate. were you hurt by someone before ? did anything significant happen before in your life that has affected you with trusting people ? if not, it can just be a fear you have. everyone has their "fears" and such. its pretty normal. some people are too trusting, others are not trusting enough. and yeah, you can fix it. communication is key. let your boyfriend know how you feel and that you have trust issues but that its not his fault and that youre working on it... and then actually work on it. FORCE yourself to trust him even when everything in you is telling you not to. he deserves your trust if he hasnt done anything. relationships are based alot on trust.. its basically the foundation. so push yourself.
6. uhm, well, this is not how i view relationships. like, at all. yeah, you both should treat eachother right, but it should be pretty equal with this stuff. in my oppinion, it is wrong. how would you feel if he wanted you to treat him like a king and do everything you just said..... ? yeah.. not so good. soooo uhm, im not going to tell you how to get him to do this.. sorrrrry !
hope i helped ! xxo.
when some one texts a message that says wrong person bitch
"im glad, i wouldnt want to be the right one, sweetie." or "youre classy." "shit, my bad, i got you mixed up with someone whose not an asshole."
.. people are stupid. you could also just not answer. sometimes thats the better route, but whoever that person is needs to lighten up and not be such a hypocrite. bitches these days ;]
xxo.
I have a boyfriend i have been with for a year and he has always been controlling. I am at the point were i cant take him telling me what i can and cannot do. I have told people about him and all of them have said get out now he is going to become abusive. I believe them because there have been times where he gets so angry that he is about to punch me but ends up not doing it. I am so sick of all the pointless pain. I am trying to get out now but he keeps saying i will change i cant live without you. I can't get out someone help. Please :(
I was trapped in a relationship similar to this one.
It started off like this.. he would get so angry and yell. then it escalated to whenever he got mad at me or something, hed punch a wall (putting holes everywhere) or drive SUPER fast in his car to scare me, and he would just scream at me, not stopping. saying hes in control and he'll slow down when he wants to. he would also raise his hand like he was going to hit me or something, and i would yell at him and threaten to leave. after this it escalated to him grabbing my arms so tight it left bruises. Even further than this, he started getting really rough with me and started throwing me around... i wont go into detail, but after all of this, I kept trying to break up with him and he said the same stuff to me like yours is to you.. "i love you, im sorry." "it wont happen ever again, please dont leave me." "ill change for you, i swear, just give me another chance." "i cant live without you, ill die. ill kill myself." and then he would actually call me and tell me he was holding a knife to his wrist and that nobody would believe me if i told them. it was just ... a terrible, terrible experience.
I'm a smart girl, and I'm sure you're a smart girl too, but I wasnt smart, and I stayed with him because i felt trapped and alone and i honestly thought nobody would believe me. but you NEED to get out. even if youre afraid.. you need to let him go and cut him out of your life for good. if he loved you, he wouldnt even raise his fist. lets put it that way. he obviously has anger issues and needs help, but you cant wait for that to happen.
if you end it (which im hoping you do/did) make sure you are in a public setting with lots of people around. make sure people know where you are and maybe even bring a friend or two along just to stand in the background to keep you safe because he sounds like hes starting to become a loose cannon.
you CAN get out, because he does not control you, and you know you deserve better. this is nto a healthy relationship, in the long run you will be so much happier without him. i promise. you can do this. :]
hope i helped, xxo.
I am a girl and I want to have sex for my first time. I am going to do it on Friday so please hurry! I want to have sex with this guy, but I'm afraid of the popping my cherry part. Is there any way that I can not pop my cherry when I do it? Thanks!:)
Every girl is afraid or at least a little nervous to lose their virginity and have sex for the first time because of the pain factor, consequences that can occur and in general: the unknown. If you really don't feel comfortable with having sex with this guy, and it's not just nerves, don't do it. Wait. There's no harm in waiting and being 100% positive that this is what you want to do.. Nt some "in the heat of the moment" type of thing.
But t answer your question, unless only the tip if his penis enters you, and not his whole penis (which wouldn't be really considered sex, or at least not full blown sex) then it won't pop. However, your cherry will pop eventually from the sex, and depending on how long and big he is... Will result in how fast or slow it will take for it to pop. And this is assuming that your cherry hasn't been popped by using a tampon or horseback riding or something like that.
Good luck and be safe ! no glove, no love, xxo.
Okay so me and this guy i have a thing with were on the couch and we cuddled madeout he even took my bra off and we touched each other and stuff but we didnt really do anything... he never got a boner through any of that amd i was womderinf if he should have. Is it bad that he didnt did i do something wrong and how can i make him get on next time?
Are you absolutely positive that he didn't have a boner ? If you are, than it is possible that he does not get aroused very quickly or easily. You didn't do anything wrong, you're perfectly fine. You can try to do what you did again, and if you notice that e doesn't get an erection for a second time, maybe ask him what e likes and dislikes and then try it out. (as long as you're being safe) let him tell you what turns him on. He might just be really nervous or self conscious which could e a reason why it won't go up. Be patient and talk it out.. Communication is key ! :) also another tip, try biting his neck gently.. A lot of guys enjoy that.
Hope I helped, xxo !
Ok so I met my boy friend when I was 15 just abot to turn 16 and anyways I fell inlove, I know it maybe puppy love but it didnt feel like it at the time, anyway about 5 months into our realation ship I had a "best friend" who came over everyday without fail and i use to ask him why he always sent me to like the shops or constantly saying oh go see your family, iv now been with him almost 3 years and it turns out that 6 months straight in our realationship he had been cheating and he always used to flirt with all my friends, now that hes scared of losing me he says he loves me, whats your honest oppinion?? What do I do it plays over in my mind 24/7 and always in my dreams :"( oh and im now 18
I understand how you feel. I've been cheated on numerous times and I made the mistake once of forgiving him, and then in my next relationship it happened again. Once a cheater, always a cheater. There is no excuse for cheating, and just because he says he loves you, doesn't really mean that he actually means it because if he loved you like he says he does and that he doesn't want to lose you, he wouldn't have been cheating on you in the first place and he wouldn't have been flirting with your friends. There are plenty of fish in the sea and I think it's about time you started fishing. It's going to be on your mind for a while, but in reality, you'll never be fully happy or able to trust him completely, if at all, ever again. It's better to move on, you're still young and you have your whole life ahead of you, don't waste it on someone who doesn't appreciate you. All you can do is let the pain come, talk to your friends, vent, maybe even seek out a therapist, cry, eat chocolate, go out and have fun... The dreams will eventually stop, and wanting him will fade too, trust me, know. Youre not alone and you dont need him, I just takes some time. Don't worry, :)
Hope I helped, xxo !