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We made out, but he didn't get a boner... what did I do wrong?
Okay so me and this guy i have a thing with were on the couch and we cuddled madeout he even took my bra off and we touched each other and stuff but we didnt really do anything... he never got a boner through any of that amd i was womderinf if he should have. Is it bad that he didnt did i do something wrong and how can i make him get on next time?
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Are you asking this because your vanity was hurt? Whether he becomes erect or not can depend on a number of factors.
Just live in the moment. Don't try to control how he feels about what you and he are doing unless he is doing something you definitely don't want him to. Guys are pretty simple. They're not girls. So relax, don't overthink and enjoy!
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Men usually get an erection at the drop of a hat so I'd say, yes he should have got it up for you. 'Performance related anxiety' can prevent it...which is a pyscho-babble way of saying 'nerves' really. Tiredness and fatigue can do it. So can alcohol...had he downed a 'few too many'? (That's a common one, you feel horny and 'drunk-confident' but the old chap just won't stand-up!. Any of the above apply? There are real medical reasons. They usually involve blood-pressure problems, possibly long and uncontrolled diabetes which damages the blood vessels...but he'd know so I assume none of these are applicable. I also assume he's not approaching pension age! Now the likely ones, listed first will take care of themselves in effect. I don't honestly think there's anything you can do to make it happen on demand, but helping relieve any anxieties he may have will make it more likely everything will work as it should. Talk's good...but a little word of caution. Guys are very often extremely touchy about this, feeling it's a slur on their manhood (our fragile egos!). So before you sit down and have a full-on enquiry (which WILL make him squirm!) I should keep on kissing, cuddling, stroking...intimacy in general, and just wait and see. Be alluring. A bit of sexy chat at the time is a good bet, knowing you want it too is a huge 'aphrodisiac' for mosy guys. We don't really like to feel you're just tolerating sexual activity for our amusement...some women can make a guy feel that way without realising it.
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Are you absolutely positive that he didn't have a boner ? If you are, than it is possible that he does not get aroused very quickly or easily. You didn't do anything wrong, you're perfectly fine. You can try to do what you did again, and if you notice that e doesn't get an erection for a second time, maybe ask him what e likes and dislikes and then try it out. (as long as you're being safe) let him tell you what turns him on. He might just be really nervous or self conscious which could e a reason why it won't go up. Be patient and talk it out.. Communication is key ! :) also another tip, try biting his neck gently.. A lot of guys enjoy that.
Hope I helped, xxo !
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