theres this girl i know and i try to be her friend and stuff but she says like she doesnt need friends and she has had no friends at all. we're both in seventh grade.. and i cant believe it. i mean i even thought i was kinda her friend.. but i guess not. she acts reeeeally weird but she also likes anime and drawing pictures. like she draws all the time even during school and has like probably hundreds of pics done. they're good and i like drawing anime too but sometimes it would make sense to be socializing but shes just sitting there by herself coloring or something. and then when you talk to her she talks... really weird like all hyper and stuff and like once i was fooling around and i combed her hair a little with a comb i found and she scribbled a pen on me and im like "you dont do that.." and she did the same to someone else.. i mean we're just trying to be friendly but its like she doesnt value our friendship because.. well i dont know why. she doesnt think friends are important.. arent they? i cant imagine living without them.. its gay and drives alot of other people away from her. i dont mind if shes a little eccentric (COUGH ALOT.) but like she should try to be my friend or does she even value being my friend? ugh.. and some girl i know hated her because everyone else did in 5th grade.. or they didnt talk to her because she was so weird. and she brought it up to her and we're like "wtf" because thats like 2 years ago! people have been immature and changed. but like... she wants people to talk to her but... she doesnt want friends? ADVICE PLEASE!!!
It sounds like she might have social issues. It could be anything from Asperger's to hormones to high functioning Autism.
If you say you want to be her friend, and she tells you she doesn't need friends, then she obviously doesn't want you as a friend.
She sounds like an eccentric who's ok with being a loner, and if she's ok with that, then there's no need to worry right now. She might change in the future.
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ok.... so im 13/f and at school my bestfriend started hanging out with this girl that i got into a fist fight with and became bestfriends and then she got mad at me cause her boyfriend said he liked me instead of her then she got like almost the hole school against me and started calling me a "fat ugly cow" and that "i look like a side of a cow" and started wrighting on the walls about me i love her like a sister and all but is she really my friend
That friendship is loooong over. And if she ever apologizes, you can forgive her, but that doesn't mean she's your friend and it doesn't mean you should associate with her.
A friends stick by your side. Friends are the ones telling you it's OK when an ENEMY like her verbally abuses you.
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my best friend, hes amazing, loud, hiper, HOTT (!), and depressed. and i cant help but have feelings for him, i mean im a horney girl (lol). but i miss him, he was admitted to the phsc ward in a hospitale. and i havent talked to him in 3 days. and i need to talk to him sooooo badly. but like he knows my number, and i know that there is a pay phone there. but i know he has like really bad depression and i know he gets embarrassed easily, and i know he likes me. and he dosent know i know hes in there. but his mom told me (and his mom told him to call me). and i know he has feelings for me. do you think hes embarrassed? what do you think i should do?
Indeed. Males, in general, do not like to look weak. He needs some time to recuperate, so try not to take it personally.
Also, if he's as depressed as it sounds like he is, it's not healthy for you two to be in a relation ship. What he really really needs right now is a 'best friend' who will stick by his side.
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Now i have a friend and i have had this friend for my hole life 15 years and we talk about everything a girl can talk about nail hair and boys. But latley ever since she has been makeing me really mad liing the guys i like taking my own friend aay from me never telling me when someone talks about me and talks about me to others now 15years is a long time and i ahve never seen this behavior from her befor do i throw that 15 years of friendship away????
now i have another friend i have only known for about 3 years and she always trys to make me jealouse by hanging with my other friend i was talking about and just leaving me!!!!
and my grades are bad i just feel like my life is all mest up!!!!
You're going through a rough age where people tend to start to be wild and mean. Tell her you can't be friends with somebody who treats you like that. Explain that if she's willing to change, you're willing to be friends again.
Then move on. It's hard to move on when you've known somebody for fifteen years, but I met two best friends when I was 15, so you have all the rest of High School to go. Don't sweat it.
Freshman grades are usually low anyway.
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WELL my friend is way over weight...and she wears a 2 peice, and she looks really sick in it. She's really just embarassing herself by wearing it. How do i tell her this!? Or should i just let her embarass herself?...Help..its really sick!!
You should tell her. This happens all too often and girls tend to have no clue. Break it to her easily. Or, you can have a fat dude break it to her.
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My friends want to hang out but we don't know what we want to do. Have any ideas??
Masturbate one another.
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hi im Tanisha and i need help i like my best friend boy friend i know thats wrong but i liked him first . i really dont want him to know cause i know he might say i dont like you , but i look better then my friend and i know its not always about the looks and stuff like that but i want him for my self and im scared to tell my friend how i feel or tell him . i never did this stuff like this and i know if i tell her that i like her boy friend (kyle) she would start crying so what should i do
You should, without a doubt, let her have him. I know you liked him first, but because she did't know that, and she's your friend, you risk ruining your friendship. It's a general honor rule that people stay away from their friend's b/gfriends. You really don't want to hurt her.
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Im 13/female and in school, im not really one of the popular people and i really want to be. What are some things i can do to get them to accepted me???
Be pretty
be thin
be witty
don't whine
don't be yourself
be sad on the inside
sell your soal to Satan.
Being popular isn't all it's cracked up to be. But the above actually is a good way to start.
The first four is what you need to be popular.
The last two is what you risk.
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OMG!!! TODAY me and my friend's friend fought b/c she talk about me behind my back and the person she talked to is mad at me b/c she been telling him that i hate him and he is stupid! i mean i never said any thing like that why she do this to me i never did any thing like this to her why she is doing this to me i hate person talk behind my back!! and she is not even my true friend.she is my friend's friend. i talked to my friend about this and her advice is useless so i dont kown what should i do to this back staping person by the way i cant just give up that ez i need to get revenge or something i cant just sit around and pertend nothing happened. ILL RATE EVER ONE WHO GIVE ME USEFUL ADVICE A BIG 5 I REALLY NEED SOME ONE TO GIVE ME ADVICE NOW SO PLZ!!!!!
Well, there isn't much you can do about her saying stuff behind your back, but if you want to get her back...
Do something personal that doesn't hurt her family. Don't toilet paper her house or throw eggs at it. That won't affect her at all, just her dad (assuming she has one).
You could always stick gum in her hair.
Punch her in the gut.
Kick her in the balls. ^_*
Yeah, so the gum is the best idea. It will affect her the longest.
Yeah, the hair is the best thing. One warning, if you believe in God, he says things will come back at you 7 times as hard as you dished them out. If you don't believe, don't worry about it.
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hey everone ok well i have this friend and she's mad at me /c i told some people about this guy she told me abuout.. and ya we're not friends nmore.. and she lives across the street from me!!! omg now her friends r making fun of me.. and today one of them wuz making fun of me of how i walk... and ya my mom thinks im friends w/ her still and i can't tell her that we're not friends nemore over some stupid guy!! cuz she'll get really mad at me!! so what should i do? pleese help me!!!
I'm having some hard times with a few friends as well. It's my last year in high school so things could end badly, so I know how you feel.
I guess the bottom line is you shouldn't have told anyone. Perhaps if you didn't know the info was confidential you could tell her, or you can apologize. Other than that there's nothing you can do. She'll forgive you or she won't and you'll have to move on and find newer, better friends.
It's not cool that they're making fun of you though.
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My best friend has been being a reall jerk lately. Shes been flipping out on me for the smallest things !! I dont want to fight back but I have to smack her into some sense. Yesterday when I told her its not my fault that her mom told her to go to bed she totally turned on me and flipped out ! I tried to calm her down but nothing i said would work. Then she just got me mad so I started yelling back at her! What should I do ?
You need to tell her you don't like being treated like that.
Tell her, and then go home. If you tell her, and then start joking around with her, she won't take you seriously.
Maybe she's just PMSing.
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I've decided to have a good sized party at the end of the year, but I stink at knowing exactly who to invite. I mean, I know my best friend and my other really close friends but here are some questions...
Do I invite the guy I like? We are pretty good friends but he's not really part of the group.
Do I invite my friend who only like seven people in our group don't make fun of?
Do I invite this girl I hate but is in my group? If I don't, I feel bad because I'm inviting all of her friends.
If you invite the guy you like and are worried he'd feel out of place, you can tell him to bring a few friends.
If only seven people don't make fun of him, wait, how many people are in your group? Anyway, he's your friend, and if a lot of people make fun of him you should surely invite him, because he probably feels socially left out enough as it is.
Being left out of a friend's party would make him feel worse.
Yeah I guess you could invite the girl you hate. Maybe she'd stop being such a bitch if you did something nice like that.
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Dear Krupple,
I feel so horrible for asking this but I need help gradually distancing myself from a friend. I first became acquainted with her earlier this year and got to know her better as time went on. I never really shared the same interests as her but you can never have too many friends and I figured that I should be as open minded as possible to give her the chance she deserved. However, as time went on I realized that we had many differences. She swears often -think Erin Brokovitch- and while I don't have a problem with the odd exclamation when someone's upset, I don't much care for it on a regular basis. Also, I found out that she broke off contact with one of my best friends some time ago in favor of someone who I'm not sure I entirely approve of. She is also staunchly set in her opinions and often monopoloizes my time; she is also not a Christian. Despite our differences, I don't want to hurt her feelings but at the same time I don't think that it is a healthy relationship for me to continue. As much of a coward as a feel for saying this, I don't think I have the courage to confront her directly- I've always been fairly soft-spoken and I'm already pretty disgusted with myself for even thinking about hurting someone. Any words of advise would be much appreciated.
Yours Truly,
Pseudonym
P.S. As uncomfortable as I am around her now, it seems that she still feels rather close to me and always wants to hang out. I feel as if it would add injury to insult to blatantly tell her that I don't feel comfortable around her anymore.
I had a best friend who was very confrontational. When he wanted to stop hanging out with me, he ignored me. It took me a year and a half to realize he was lying to me, and that's why we didn't hang out very often. It really bothered me. I'd mentally beat myself up trying to figure out if he was avoiding me.
I understand you aren't best friends or anything and it's mature of you to stop hanging out with someone because you fear they will have a negative affect on you.
Perhaps you could tell her your mom doesn't want you two to hang out anymore (I don't know how old you are). You could also tell her you need some space, and take a break from hanging with her. I understand it's hard to confront people, but if you decide to do so just tell her that you didn't want to flat out avoid her without telling her anything because you didn't want to be mean.
I think (if you have not already solved the problem) you should send her a note on AIM or an email about how things aren't going well. And better yet, summer is comming up so you should be able to stay away from her fairly easily.
Hope I've helped, I'm a bit rushed so give me some more info if you wish.
C, ya
James
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i hate fake people. i can't stand them. my freind is kind of shy around people. but when she gets online she talks to everyone. liek to all these guys who she would NEVER talk to in person. and the only way she knows these guys are because of me. she had a myspace and talkd to all these people and acts so fake! how can i get her to stop?
I'm going to tell you the truth because I know you want to hear it.
There's no way to make her change. You'll need to stop caring, or stop hanging out with her. It's your choice.
Good luck.
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OKay lets call this guy.. sean.
sean and i have been best frineds for 3 years.
4 months we went out
but we stayed close.. even closer.
he told me i was irriplacible and he loves me more than a best friend. That all changed this year. My birthday party came up and i was hanging with him the most. There were 6 guys there including sean and 4 out of the 6 liked me. They got mad and decided they "hate" sean. All the grlz hated him too cus hes "popular" (bad reason.. i know!) and then my friend laurens dad died and i asked him if he was going to the funeral and he has a spazz attack on me telling me its not a social hour. Later he told meits cus of that and my friends hating him. He didnt want to be my frined anymore, and i lost him. I called 100 times and all he said was "okay.Great.Bye" grr! On top of that.. I loved this guy! wut do i do?
You leave him. His other friends aren't true friends anyway. They stopped liking him because he liked you. I have two friends dating girls I'm interested in, but I don't hold anything against them.
He chose his friends over you, and for that you need to forget about him. It won't be easy, I've lost best friends, but it's worth finding someone who doesn't care what other people think.
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I have a workmate that has a problem. She is an extremely nice person and has plenty of friends and I quite like her as a friend too, the only problem is that she constantly tells lies. I have found that when she starts talking now I just switch off because I can't believe anything that she says. The other people that we work with feel the same way and we feel that even though she is a nice person we have just lost all respect for her. I have tried to catch her out on her lies to let her know that she can't keep getting away with it but she just lies her way out of it. I have even confronted her about this but she just denies it.One of her most recent lies was that her father has cancer which I know is not true because I have spoken to other family members. Not all of her lies are big like this one in fact some are just so insignificant that you would wonder WHY BOTHER?
What makes some people do this (feeling inadequate?) and how can I help her to overcome it.
Hmmm, she could be a sociopath. I'm reading an informational book (written by a someone with a PhD) called 'The Sociopath Next Door.'
Sociopaths are usually well known and liked.
Chronic, chronic liars.
The nicest people you'll ever meet (until they hurt you mentally or otherwise)
Famous for crocodile tears
they like to say "you owe me" to get you not to tell when you find out thier dirty sociopathic secret.
and live off of PITY.
They love pity. They'll make up stories about family members having cancer, bad childhood, dead housbands, you name it. Some have blood lusts, like Hitler, but most live day out thier day to day lives, hurting you without you sometimes whithout you realising it was them.
1 in 20 people is a sociopath. They can feel no guilt, have nobody they truly care about, have nobody they actually love and will do anything to get ahead. They don't understand the difference between right and wrong.
They can and will become your best friend if you cannot spot them. They'll make you think they care and have feelings. They'll use you and leave you high and dry.
She could just be a chronic liar who needs attention though. I wouldn't try to change her.
Instead, maybe you can spend your energy on people who need you more.
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just died. She was 23. Should I go to the funeral, or will it be too depressing?
Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
I'd go to the funeral. It will be depressing, but you might never really have a sense that she is dead unless you see her.
Plus, it's closure.
I'm sorry to hear about it. It's hard when someone so young dies.
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ok i am going out with this kid, i really like him alot. He likes me to but i also think he like my best friend. The first week we were going out my best friend kissed him but i forgave him because that is how much i like him. But do you think that i should ask him to stop flirting with her or dump me?
please help me :'(
confussed luv
First, if your best friend knew you liked him and were dating, 'dump' her.
Second, if he kissed her back and you two were not supposed to be doing stuff with other people, totally forget about him.
Cheaters always cheat.
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This is long...sorry...but if you read this and answer I promise to rate you a 5 and I will be so greatful! thanks in advance for reading this. I have this friend named nicole (fake name) and she has been my best friend for about 2 years. She gets really annoying and is pretty stupid, and my family doesn't like her very much. She doesn't have a lot of money and her parents are completely uninvolved in her life. My parents do everything for her and we get nothing in return. She never really does anything to show she appreciates it and I really don't like that and neither does my family. So recently she's been pretty rude to me. She ditched me twice. At lunch I sit with nicole and kelly (fake also) and 3 other girls who im kinda barely friends with but mostly I only talk to nicole and kelly. well kelly is "popular" all of a sudden to nicole but no one really likes her...and no one really likes nicole because she's so annoying. I know nicole doesn't care about popularity because if she did she wouldn't be so weird and act so nerdy. We're not popular but we're not geeks, I guess we are known as just normal group, except to the geeks we are known as popluar, so i've heard. Well nicole has just been obsessed with kelly and she blows me off or is too busy to hang out with me but not kelly. I have many friends in school, like a ton, but I usually only hang out with friends once every week or maybe even less then that. I only really hang out with nicole. But shes always so busy and always grounded so I kind of have no friends outside of school. I make an effort to hang out with other girls I know at my school but it never really works out, not that they don't like me just our plans don't really follow through. Sorry I'm writing a lot but I wanted you all to understand the background of my question. So here it is...Today nicole got mad at me and I had no idea why and so her and kelly totally ditched me at lunch and sat with someone else and I asked kelly is she mad at me she said no there was no room at the table...when there were plenty. I am so mad at nicole I seriously was about to punch her because suspension was worth punching her. She totally takes advantage of me and I keep going back to be her friend. My parents and bother think I should stop being her friend and there a feeling in me that I want to but then there's also a feeling that's not willing to give her up. The main reason I don't stop being her friend is if I do then kelly wont be my friend and I'll have no one to sit with at lunch and no one to talk to during class because most people in all my classes are popular or totally nerdy and all that stuff. But today seemed like the last straw and I don't want to be her friend but I'm afraid of what will happen. I'm hoping once I start high school I'll make new friends and totally ditch her for good, but thats about 6 months away and I don't want to go with nobody to hang out with during summer if I stop being her friend. I really love her and shes so funny and fun to be around. If I didn't love her, I would hate her and think she is the stupidest person ever, and I would never consider being her friend, if you know what I mean. I love that she doesn't care what others think, but sometimes I hate it because she is truly embarassng and since not a lot of people like her, I think that's why nobody ever calls me to hang out because they probably think I'm just like her. Basically I want to know all of your opinions about what I should do. Stay her friend, ditch her, wait a little longer, etc? Please help I have no idea what to do!!! I will rate you 5 if you answer no matter if I like your answer or not, just because you read all this. By the way, im 14 female. thanks so much!
Wow! That was pretty extensive, but at least you got all of the facts in.
I have a situation similar to yours. My friend was never blatantly mean to me, but he did avoid me and for no reason at all. It took me a year and a half of barely hanging out with him to finally quit caring. We were really good friends, and I like the person he used to be.
That's what you need to understand about your friend. You put a hell of a lot of effort into her, and now she's ditching you. She'll continue to do this over and over, hurting you again and again if you don't break it off. Trust me, getting stopping things now will save you a lot of trouble later.
Also, it sounds like everyone in your family has already given you their opinion and I'd say you already know what you need to do, but you're hesitant to do it. Letting go of a friend you've had forever is never easy.
Try to sit at another table, and you'll be able to make some friends by the end of the year. You've still got MONTHS to go. Another thing you should know, it things change dramatically in ninth and tenth grade. Most cliques break up and people become people. They grow up and quit caring what people think as much.
You just have to decide if you want to choose to use your non friend to get close to Kelly, causing you stress and emotional confusion throughout the entire summer, or make some new friends who will treat you the way you deserve.
Pretty easy decision. I know you'll make the right choice.
Btw, paragraphs would make it easier to read next time. :)
Good luck!
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hey i'm a guy, and one of my friends got pregnant. the whole school found out and eventually her parents did too. right now shes feeling terrible and her parents flipped out on her. i heard her talking to some of her friends and said she was considering getting an abortion. i asked her about it and she said shes worried and afraid its a bad idea. what should i tell her about it? i mean i don't think she should get one, but how do i help her with what she wants to know? thanks
She should NOT get an abortion. The abortion agencies are TERRIBLE. Planned parenthood will pay for your abortion, but if you want to keep your baby, they won't give you any financial help, but will ask you over and over to abort.
Here's a link from someone who used to be an abortionist, talking about the evils of the agency.
Abortionists speak
http://www.abortionfacts.com/providers/providers.asp
http://www.abortionfacts.com/life_or_choice/unsure.asp For people who aren't sure
http://www.abortionfacts.com/PAS/PAS.asp Post abortion syndrome.
http://www.abortionfacts.com/planned_parenthood/planned_parenthood.asp Evils of planned parenthood.
http://www.abortionfacts.com/effects/effects.asp effects of abortion
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