I like to help people so feel free to ask me for any advice :) I'm not a font of all knowledge but I can offer honest realistic advice.
Other than that I'm just a student who likes having fun and playing games.
Gender: Female
Location: England
Occupation: Student
Age: 18
Member Since: May 7, 2011
Answers: 111
Last Update: January 8, 2013
Visitors: 7858
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Me and my ex broke up just over a year ago, I broke up with him, not for any particular reason, I just didn't really want to be with him any more as I found our relationship had become a bit boring. I wanted to remain friends, but he claimed to find the break up very hard and cut off all connections to me (deleting my number, removing/blocking me on all social networking sites etc) until out of the blue about 2 months ago he sent me a message asking how I was doing. After deliberation I decided not to reply. Me and him know quite a lot of the same people, and I always hear things he's said about me, however I always hear very different things, for example ill hear from one person that hes still obsessed with me and hear from another that hes told them him and myself were never really anything special. Since we broke up, he hasn't really played on my mind at all and I've been very happy, but he is now with someone else, and all of a sudden after all this time he's playing on my mind. I am starting to feel I maybe should have replied to his message, however the other half of me is telling me I don't need him and could find someone better. He has been in my dreams for the last 3 nights, and has never been before. I guess i'm a bit jealous. I just don't really know whether I do still have feelings for him or it's just an initial common jealousy that all people get when their ex meets someone new. I don't really know what to do next? (link)
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This is a typical case of "I want what I can't have." before, you heard little stories and thought you were in the driving seat of the whole situation, now that he has moved on you realise you weren't quite where you were hoping you would be and it's set you on a back-track if you will.
Let's face it, your story just says the relationship ran it's course. No hard feelings, nobody hurt anyone else, just it had done and you were happy with it being like that. Most often this is the case, sometimes you find you just need a break and things get better again, but you usually would be upset and miss your boyfriend during this break, sounds like you genuinely just wanted to move on to the next stage in your life, and that's fine.
My advice is to just carry on, don't spoil things for him, he moved on and is happy now. You just focus on work/school and enjoy YOUR life, meet someone new who excites you and then when you make peace with your ex having a new gf perhaps you can meet her and even be her friend, if not then no worries, your not expected to like the new women, that's a given, and the new women don't tend to like the ex. Women are very territorial lol.
As I said, just forget about this situation and carry on with your life how you want to live it.
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I'm 16 and I'm a female my boyfriend just turned 29 and we have been together almost 7 month on the 18th and we are both Christians so we believe and agree that we shouldnt have sex til we are married but my friends hate him because he is white and is 29 they try to tear us apart and sometimes they tell me that its Either them that I let go of or my boyfriend but I don't know what to do?! By the way my boyfriend promised me and my mother that he isn't in this relationship to get in my pants that he wants to wait until marriage... what do I do? How do I keep them both?! (link)
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You're boyfriends being the good guy here. Age is just a number and race is just a factor of pigments on the skin, what rubbish criteria to judge someone on, right?
You're friends are being unfair to you, they want to break you up because they don't agree with your choices, and I've been there, but just point out, a true friend would stand by you, even knowing full well where it'll lead, just so they can catch you and hold you up when they get to be proven right.
(I'm not saying they're right, just that's how a friend should be regardless.)
Now for some honest truth. You're 16, I have lost touch with almost ALL my friends from when I was 16, just because we went to different universities, got on with our lives and met other people. If they say it's them or your happiness, the choice is obvious, don't sacrifice yourself for other people, especially when they clearly won't do the same for you. Talk to them and explain why they are wrong, tell them they are not being good friends and if they don't change, YOU walk away.
Best of luck x
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it really sucks to see your friends act lovey dovey with their mutual crushes/boyfriends when the furthest your love life has ever gotten is just having crushes (that you don't know are returned). it's just confusing because I don't think it's a fault on my looks.. there's nothing I'd change about my appearance. people with far less looks have been on dates and all that, and I get complimented pretty regularly. not being conceited or anything, just being honest, cause normally when you say you've never been kissed at like 18 you'd think it's cause they're not good looking or something. It just makes me insecure because I really don't know what to think.. I've never seriously been asked out and its not that I'm not friendly or anything, either. I'm just wondering what I'm doing wrong. I have friends who've been doing the whole boyfriend thing since somewhere between ages 11-16. I hung out with some friends today and it was like there were two couples (they're just at the crush stage, though) and I was the odd girl out. we watched a movie and they were like snuggling and it just made me feel sad I've never had anyone like that, when my girl friends have. one of my friends has guys hitting on her all the time, and it's not like she looks like a model or anything, either. it's just frustrating. i told them about how I was still a lip virgin and they said it was a good thing and they wish they could be in my position, but I don't get how. there's nothing fun or good about not being with someone for so long. nothing at all. it really hurts, the times when you just want to kiss someone or someone to just love you in that romantic way. its hard to imagine all those romance movies or movies with any romance being in reality.. it's like I'm missing out on this whole other world. I'm not desperate or anything, though, but if someone genuinely asked me out and I was attracted to them, I'd give them a chance. I'm new to the world of hanging with a lot of guys cause in high school I was kind of the loner who just mixed with different groups of mainly girls. i just started college and i'm now in a group (which feels awesome, I've never been in such a tight nit clique before. I've never felt like I really belonged anywhere before with other people who genuinely wanted to be friends and shared a lot of my weird interests) but apart from the two pairs of "crushes" the two other guys are in relationships and then 1 other guy is single but I'm not attracted to him (though one of my friends considers him attractive). sorry for this huge rant but I just had to get it off my chest. I'd talk to my new girl friends about it but I don't want to be a debbie downer. they seem like they're in that state of bliss when you're crushing on someone and they know it's returned and I just envy that. I keep it inside, though, and just act like normal, though, but it deep down hurts cause it just makes me feel alone again. I even liked one of the guys who's crushing on one of my girl friends in my group (there's 3 of us, me included) until I realized that he liked that one girl. I still find him attractive and we strangely have way too much in common (even more than he does with that girl he fancies) but I'm trying to just let it go and just be friends since I guess he just wants to be friends with me, but it's just hard. and I wouldn't try anything now that my friend likes him back, which she admitted after i told her i wasn't really into him anymore in that way (which was a lie, but the signs were getting obvious that he liked her). like it's just ridiculous. how patient am I supposed to be? I don't want to just use my first kiss on some random guy just cause I want to do that stuff but I do want to be loved in that way, you know. there's nothing awesome about being single at all. maybe if you've already been in relationships so you want a break, after you know what it's like, but especially not after you've gone through your teenage years with NOTHING and you feel hormones and what not a lot. sometimes i wish i could just turn off those feelings and just focus on the important stuff - school, but i'm not a robot, i'm just a human who wants to be loved more than a friend, why is this so difficult (link)
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Hey there, I assure you I know EXACTLY how you feel! In fact, your story matches mine entirely haha.
Anyway, as I was in your position, please listen when I say its better to be patient! when your friends say they wish they were in your position they probably mean it, I sure would love to have met my current boyfriend before anyone else had gotten anything from me but I'd gotten so desperate to understand what was so great about relationships I just sold myself out, don't do that, trust me you'd regret it.
I have no doubts your a very attractive young woman, it isn't so much about looks as confidence and personality however, Psychologists argue that people are attracted to people that match their own looks so beautiful people go with beautiful and less attractive go with less attractive, this works for these other factors as well so fun and confident people often go for the same type of people.
It's great that you have found your own group of close friends, don't be afraid to ask the girls for a night out with just the girls, I'm sure they arn't oblivious to you not wanting to be the "third wheel" all the time and it'll cheer you up having a girly day :)
I'll tell you throughout my highschool and college life I felt like something was wrong with me for nobody to pay attention what-so-ever, but as soon as i went to university plenty of people began asking me out etc etc. I found I was just not in the right place at the time, strange isn't it? You could just be going about your own life, find yourself somewhere new and suddenly find plenty of people looking for a relationship with you! But don't thret over these things, focus on your studies and your life.
When you do find someone who you form a relationship with not only will he feel so special that he's your first kiss and whatever else you do, but he'd have a massive respect for you!
Afterall, who'd want the used charity toys when there is one still in it's packaging :)
Keep smiling your dazzling smile and don't let a lack of love life get you down, it'll hit you when you least expect it and you'll love every second :)
Goodluck x
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Ok I'm 17 f and I was hanging with my two friends that are girls. My boyfriend was also there but he said I was weird because I act different with my friends and that he felt left out. My boyfriend wanted to give me a hug and kiss but I didn't let him get to lovey dovey because my friends would of felt left out. I was to bussy trying to make my two friends feel less weird by totally not being lovey dovey with my boyfriend and I guess I ignored him in a way, even though I didn't want to. Should I invite my friends when I hang with my boyfriend? Or keep inviting my friends but this time not ignore him and kiss and hug in front of my friends? I'm very akward person so sometimes I don't know what to do..
Thanks for reading!!(:
(link)
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I think you need to balance your love life and your friendships. you can't ignore one for the other as its not fair to either. Invite your boyfriend out (but not ALL the time, have your girl time as well) and when he's out with you do the more subtle things, hold his hand, sit on his lap if there's not many seats, sit close to him if there is, but keep involving everyone in the conversation.
Be thankful your friends accept him as well, it gets much worse when friends hate the boyfriend, so keep it balanced, have private time with both of them and keep them both involved in your life. It's a bit tricky at first, but once you find the balance everything fits together perfectly :)
goodluck x
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I have been w/ my amazing bf for 10 months. I have never cheated until this relationship. Before him I dated a guy who cheated on me a lot. My parents made me breakup w/ him and threatened to take everything away from me.. I'm not in high school btw I am in college. I could not stop seeing my ex, I still love him. I am still seeing my ex and my current bf. it is seriously making me sick to my stomache. Idk why I even so it because I am not sexually attracted to my ex... I just love him and don't know what I would do without him... But I also lOve my bf... None of them know about each other and both think I am exclusive. It is almost making me want to move away and cut ties with everyone.... Advice?? (link)
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Well, it sounds to me like you are in love with what you thought you and your ex had, and upset you never ended it on your own terms as your parents forced you to do it. Your ex betrayed you, and I think you need time to overcome that, in the meantime, you know what you are doing is wrong.
You said you want to be with your current boyfriend and yet you love your ex as well, that's understandable. Perhaps he was your first serious boyfriend or he just met your expectations and because of that he'll always have a place in your heart, but you will be hurting him more by keeping up with this façade.
My advice would be to break it off with your ex since we established you don't want to be with him, tell him you can be friends and perhaps in the future it'll change, who knows? And then really sit and think if you want to be with your boyfriend now, if you did, ask yourself why you did this, knowing yourself how it feels.
I don't want to sound like I am lecturing, but this is a serious topic so I want you to really think before you make your decisions. Just remember, it's your life, not your parents, do what makes YOU happy, not them.
goodluck
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I have no guys in my life when all my other friends and most girls my age do. I've never had a boyfriend and have never done anything sexual besides drunk kissing at parties if that even counts( no, I'm not gay!). I'm a bit overweight but not too much and not ugly, I'm told sometimes that I'm pretty and get compliments every so often. I usually attribute my issues with this to my looks, thinking I'm not pretty enough for guys to notice me. This may be part of the problem but I'm sure it has to do with shyness and low self-esteem too. I have a hard time coming out of my shell and I'm a very cautious, careful person. As much as I try I can't change this about me. and I don't think that wearing slutty outfits would make so much of a difference. I know that confidence is most attractive, blah, blah, blah. But I have a good personality, I'm kind, intelligent, witty, and talented and have a good amount of friends. That combined with being somewhat pretty should get me SOME male attention, right? Why is it that I get NONE at all besides the occasional guy grinding up on me at the club? All of my friends have flings and relationships .Why can't this be me? I'm in my third year of college and literally haven't experienced anything yet. How is my confidence supposed be high in this regard if no one shows interest in me? (link)
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Hey, I really know where your coming from! It took me 18 years before a guy even asked me out and almost 20 years for me to find my first boyfriend. I'm sure you are very pretty, beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and in college guys usually aren't interested in a relationship, they want to get laid as often as possible, and if you don't agree with one-night stands then stand by it!
I found after the first few guys paid attention to me, more started to follow, I can only guess that the first few boosted my confidence, so think of everyone that HAS paid attention to you, they thought you were pretty and worthy of their time after all.
Boosting your confidence is a good start, but don't rely on others to boost it for you, think of who you are, you're smart, pretty, funny, and you have a collection of friends who clearly see that in you :)
Stand tall and wait for the right guy who will make you realise just how special you are.
Goodluck
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My boyfriend and i have been in a relationship for 2 yrs. We loved each other a lot but often had fights over little things & he would temporary break up with me (like me refusing to eat fish-which is a very imp part of his culture). It was a Saturday and my last exam was over, i couldn't wait to spend the evening with him. We were having a very nice evening when i passed a comment about his family having no property of their own and staying in a rented apartment. This upset him a lot and he broke up with me. We had no contact for a week and i missed him. The following Saturday evening, he stopped by to collect his stuff from my place when i cried & apologized but he stuck to his decision. He was going to a pub with his friends (two guys). I felt sad and depressed that night and requested him to let me come along too to which he agreed. i tried getting his attention the whole time there but he ignored me & spoke to his friends about another girl he found hot and how she'd be a perfect fit in the family. I was heart broken & i allowed myself to get absolutely drunk and while they were dropping me back home, my boyfriend sat in front with one of his friends who was driving while i sat behind with the other..now i dont remember anything in the car but he saw me give his frnd a peck on his lips from the rear view mirror.The next day he calls me all sorts of names, tells his parents too..he said he would've gotten back if i hadn't done this..he says i cheated on him and i must be his bitch and get out of my skin to get him back. Its been 2 months now and he hasn't gotten back but treats me like his bitch. I have quit drinking out of my own will. i really love the guy, what must i do? (link)
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Honestly, I'd leave him. He sounds temperamental and controlling. A man doesn't "break up" with his woman over something silly like a comment, he may fall out with you but that should be resolved in a day tops!
When he was out with his friends, talking about this "hot woman" who'd fit in, he did that entirely on purpose. He knew you'd hear it and it would upset you, as a form of punishment. Understandably you wanted to drink to both not remember feeling that way any more and hope to drown out their conversation, his friend was most likely trying to comfort you, as I'd imagine you were visibly upset, guess what?
That isn't his friends job! If your man upset you, your man should fix it, not ignore you and expect you to get over it.
By all senses this sounds like an emotionally abusive relationship, and that can escalate quickly. Unfortunately men like this are very good at getting a girl to fall for them, it's a game to them so get out while you can and meet a man that appreciates you! theres plenty out there and you have all the time in the world :)
goodluck x
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Ok so I broke up with this guy, lets call him brendan. So I broke up with brendan a couple months ago because I got pressured by this other guy... =/ Brendan is so sweet and funny and nice and cute and totally the perfect package. (Note: I wont use the guy's real names) Anyways, this guy uhm call him Ryan pressured me to break up with brendan and then he asked me out and I said yes =( I broke up with Ryan after realizing what a jerk he is (only lasted a week) Its been 3 months since I broke up with Ryan. Yesterday, we went to Canadas Wonderland for a band trip. Brendan is in band but Ryan isnt. I've always liked brendan and we've come to be good friends. I flirt with him occasionally, he flirts back =) After playing 3 songs at this band thing we got to go on all the rides at 1pm and had to meet back at 6pm. Me and my friend decided to ask Brendan and one of his friends that she likes to be in our group. They said sure and so we ate lunch then went back to the bus to get our band instruments. After we played our instruments, we went to the bus to drop off our instruments and then get clothes to change in to. We went to the bath rooms to get changed and we told Brendan and his friend to meet us outside after. They both ditched... =( I was SO pissed off!!! After at 6, I saw him and went over to him and said "Your such a ditcher!" On the bus he walked by and smiled and I said, "I've never seen more of an asshole to ditch someone" His friend didnt feel well so me and Sydney had to switch spots and surprise surprise, it was behind brendan... He turned around and said "Im sorry for ditching, why was it so important to you that I was there anyways?" and I said "if you knew then you would understand" Brendan:"You like me dont you" Me:"how did you know" Brendan:"its obvious" Then I wore his hat for the rest of the 3 hour drive back home. He asked Sydney for a pen then started writing hand notes to me saying, "I dont know if I can do this again, if you liked me then you shouldnt have broken up with me in the first place" ANd I said, "I know, Im so freaking stupid. I understand..." and then we got home and he leans over to me and whispers into my ear "What I miss the most is your hugs" and I almost started crying. TOday, his friend comes over to me and he says " DO you like brendan?" me:" what makes you think that?" him:"he told me everything, he likes you too" and yeahh. ADVICE? All of this is overwelming. My other friend Emily told Brendan the real reason I broke up with him. So um opinions? I dont know what to do! HELP!! (link)
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If you like this boy, and he obviouslly likes you too you need to really talk to him. Think about why you were swayed into breaking up with him in the first place and then decide is it likely to happen again.
People make mistakes thats a given, and we learn from them, you thought Ryan would be a better match and quickly realised you were wrong and since then its obvious you have managed to rebuild most of the relationship you had with Brendan.
That's good progress!
I think you need to remove all other obstacles in the way, ask Brendan to go and have a meal with you or to go for a walk, not to watch a film as that cuts into the time you have to discuss what you both want to happen.
Explain everything as fully as you can to him, including your present feelings and your obvious guilt for what you did
However, be prepared for him to want to remain as friends, he was hurt by your decision and he may be unsure if he can trust you, he clearly wants to remain friends at the very least, so if that is the outcome of the conversation then accept it and build the trust back up.
Best of luck x
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17/f
Ok so I'm a Christian and my boyfriend isn't. I'm fine with it and stuff but I'm afraid that somehow we'll argue about it and it'll get to me.
I'm not like gonna try and change him or anything, I just want advice from people who is with someone that isn't of the same religion and how you get through it and how you deal with it.
Thanks! (link)
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My boyfriend is Christian and I am not really religious at all, it works out fine because we very rarely talk about religion for that reason, he goes to church and knows I won't go so doesn't invite me, simple as that lol.
As long as you both understand each other, I mean, we play with each other, I give him scientific reasons for his religious babble and what not but I appreciate his beliefs and would never truly mock him, a relationship is based on understanding so as long as you don't constantly go on about your religion and he doesn't always insult it or mock you then you should be fine :)
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im so confused!! so me and my boyfriend have been dating for almost 9 months. we have been wanting to step our relationship up a few notches. we have been wanting to have sex, but i have worries and questions. suuch as:
- what does it feel like?
- how much does it hurt?
-do you really bleed after??
if you know the answer, tell me! and if theres anything else i should know please feel free to tell me!! thanks. (link)
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To make it simple.
-The first time isn't going to feel very nice most likely, though everyone experience is different but typically you will be too nervous to really enjoy it, but when you get used to it it can be a very enjoyable experience :)
-again, depends on the person, sometimes you can do things to make it hurt less like if you do horse riding the chance of it hurting will be less (since the pain comes from breaking the hymen and things like horse riding help make it thinner and break easier)
-and once again, depends. I didn't bleed and neither did some of my friends but equally some had a little bit of blood and some had quite a bit. Still it isn't as bad as a period, most of the time its just like a bad cut and will stop bleeding within minutes :)
As for advice, foreplay is important to make yourself wet, so fingering and things like that, also if you never had that and that hurts I would say spend much longer than usual since fingers are much smaller lol. Also lube will probably help, since being nervous can stop you becoming wet yourself and that will just make it much more painful for you, and don't forget to always use protection (for added protection you can also go on the pill but remember only condoms protect from STD's)
And finally, never do anything you don't feel comfortable with, at the end of the day you can never go back and change your mind so make sure it's what you want and not just something your doing to keep your boyfriend, if he loves you he will wait :) x
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Why do people have sex when there pregnant with no condom or anything when they know they can get more baby's in there and they don't even want this one?
Why do that?! (link)
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Hi, like the person below said, the only time more than one child is born by the same woman is when they are twins/triplets etc and that happens in the exact same way as a single child is born.
Basically the sperm penetrates the egg in the woman's womb and that's when a baby begins to grow (if the sperm never does this a woman won't be pregnant) I don't remember how twins come about exactly but I believe the two options are the egg splits which creates identical children or the woman has produced more than one egg (this is why twins/triplets are common with IVF). Anyway to summarise once you become pregnant no amount of sperm will make you have another baby until after that baby is born and a new egg is released (this is why periods stop when you're pregnant, the body detects a baby and stops releasing eggs).
And as for the later part of the question as to why people don't use protection, sometimes a mistake led to a pregnancy and they don't believe in abortion in which case there is no harm in continuing to have unprotected sex (other than gaining STD's) since some people believe it feels better. Sometimes people wanted children anyway so obviously that's the best way. And finally some people are plain stupid :)
x
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She's crying because she had a nightmare last night that her husband didn't love her anymore. She's been married to him for 10 years and they love each other very much. But she's scared to talk to him. I hate seeing her so sad. She's 9 months pregnant too. Due to have their first baby next week. What can I do to make her feel better ? (link)
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Start by explaining that at 9 months she is probably quite hormonal and that really will play havoc with her emotions, also with it being their first child she is probably very scared and one of the greatest fears I'd have personally is if my husband/boyfriend left me to raise a child alone, so that's probably where the bad dream and emotions are coming from. Tell her that you can tell her husband is madly in love with her and is over joyed to be having a family with her and let her know you'll be there for her as well :) If that fails tell her you'll help her talk to her husband about it and then he can tell her himself that he would never leave her :)
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So when it comes to my boyfriend and I's sex life I'd say it was amazing. I like to keep things new and fresh coming up with different ways to turn him on BEFORE even getting to the sex. The one that always works is when I trace my tounge on his lips and exhale, even he tells me "Babe I love when you tease me like that", but I feel like it's getting old and I wan't to try something new. ONLY TO TEASE THO! I don't think I need any help in the "sex" area. (link)
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One of my favourite tricks is to gently play on his ear lobe with your tongue and suck on it now and then, works a treat on my man, equally if you have fairly decent length nails, slowly drag them up his back when he doesn't expect it, that also works for me :)
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21 female. Ben -18
I've known Ben for about 8 years, but we haven't always been close. We recently started dating. He's not the type of guy I usually go for. I usually go for the college hockey boys -the ones all the girls want. But after the past 3, things clearly haven't been working out with those type of boys.
Now that I'm with Ben he treats me so unbelievably good. He would honestly do anything for me. I'm so comfortable with him, I've never been as comfortable with anyone else. My family likes him. I couldn't ask for a better boyfriend. But, I still keep thinking about wanting someone better. Yes, I'm crazy!! How could I find anyone better than Ben? I'm still wanting those hockey boys. I'm attracted to them, I find them sexy. Ben is cute and I'm a little bit attracted to him but it's not as strong as an attraction as hockey boys.
I tell Ben I have doubts because we're so different and he's not usually the type I go for. He gets really sad when I talk about it, because it would break his heart if we ever ended our relationship. He tells me to just give it a try, and that is what I will do but I am just so confused :(
I know I will not find a boy that treats me as good as Ben does. I keep telling myself that as the years go on, and I get older, the popular college hockey boys won't matter anymore because they will just be regular people too. They won't be the "stars" which is why I think I want them so bad. I have to remind myself that it's all about how a man treats me and if he treats me good and Ben does. My head is in a million different places. Ben is my first real boyfriend, all the other hockey boys I've just had "things" with, and they didn't last very long. Maybe I'm just not used to having a boyfriend. I'm a big flirt, so maybe I miss that!? I would never cheat on Ben though, I wouldn't do anything to hurt him. I don't why I keep doubting myself with Ben.
Please any guidance, advice, ANYTHING is appreciated!! (link)
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I understand how you feel, I always go for the gangster boys myself but as you said I know they don't usually work out so I'm really quite careful.
If this is your first boyfriend there is a chance you are missing the desire to flirt and look, and it is really natural to look at other people and like what you see, human nature dictates we always want the best mate we can get, so right now, hockey boys with the strong bodies make our human instincts want them simply for the "hunter" advantages. Still you don't have to ACT on this, chances are Ben has seen girls here and there and at least thought "she's attractive" so don't feel too guilty about that.
Plus being different makes no difference at all really, variety is the spice of life after all. It would grow annoying if you never had your own things to do and you'd get tired very quickly of the relationship. Perhaps he is just too different to what you were expecting if all previous experiences have been with men who had women throwing themselves all over them, that can cause a bit of confusion as you will always be waiting for the same patterns to emerge but they never do.
Ben asked you to give him a chance and you can only give him a chance if you see him for him and not who he isn't, if he is sweeter and kinder than the other guys why would you say that's a negative, he's probably less likely to cheat on you and more likely to do what he can to make you happy.
However, if after a few months you genuinely can't find yourself feeling genuinely attracted you both owe it to each other to find the people right for you. but give him a chance he clearly loves you and I believe you care about him too, you just need to try and get over the pattern you followed before and let him prove his worth to you :) good luck
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Hi Im Gracie and I'm 13! Remember me? No? That's okay. LOL :)
Anyway, I have a question about, like guys and dating and stuff. Kinda, 2 questions actually.
Well, Im 13 and he's 16.
Okay so my first question is, is it weird to date someone with the same name as your brother? His name is Matt and my brothes name is Matt. It's kinda awkward and my friends say some stuff like its gross and stuff and it's kinda embarrassing. What do you think?
My second question is, Do you think its wrong for us to date each other because he's older? I really, really like him and he says that he likes me too but he doesnt want his friends to know we're dating because they're gonna say stupid stuff about it because he's older and everything. I mean, I don't see the bid deal and it kinda hurts my feelings a little. He wants to keep it a secret that we're dating. It kinda makes me feel like he's ashamed of me or something. Maybe Im just being over sensitive?
But I like him alot, maybe even love him a little and I dont want to keep us a secret. I told my bestfriend Natalie that we were dating now and Matt (My boyfriend not my brother) found out and he got really mad and he hit me. I get why he was mad. He's popular, and has lots of friends and tons of girls that wish they could be his girlfriend and he gets mad when his frinds say stuff about him hanging out with me. It makes him upset. Its just that I've like him for a long time and I've alwaysed wish he would like me back and date me. I dont want to hide it from everybody. What if other girls start flirting with him because they dont know he's dating me?
Am I being stupid?
(FYI- We're in the same grade. I skipped a few grades. Im the youngest kid at my high school. Im a sophomore.) (link)
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first of all, there's only so many names and you are probably likely to meet plenty of people who have names that are the same as friends/family, (I have 5 friends called Rebecca and that's my middle name so yeah.) so you can't hold that against anyone.
Secondly, I don't think anything you told us about his reasons to keep you a "secret" are justified, a three year age gap is nothing to be ashamed of, it's quite normal really. If he doesn't want his friends to know and doesn't want these other girls flocking to him to know he's off limits then that would send warning signals straight to me. If he doesn't like doing the lovey things in public like kissing and cuddling fair enough but most people at least hold hands.
And hitting you? That is never acceptable. if he hits you over such a stupid thing he has major issues, the only time id ever forgive that sort of behaviour is if i seriouslly had asked for it and got an apology immedietly, as in within 2 seconds. What you did was tell a friend an important thing to you that made you happy, how is that wrong?
he clearly doesn't care for your feelings very much or your established friendships with other friends. If you want to stay with him I'd say you ask to talk and ask him why exactly you are a secret and why he felt beating you was an appropriate response. But from what you have said, be prepared to walk away and find someone who actually deserves someone who seems as nice and smart as you :) good luck.
x
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Well, I'm Male-16. I have never really had a girlfriend. School just started. I get tired of seeing guys and their girlfriends on the bus or in the halls. Finding a girl that actually likes me seems to be near impossible. What is it? I see some of the idiots with their girlfriends and think, "Why the hell....?" I mean there's like no girls interested in me. Yet these guys who act tough and are all cocky and think they're invincible have girlfriends. I kind of have no life, but I get good grades and come up with things that are outside the box. Its like nobody can see what I'm capable of and what know. It is so annoying when I talk to a girl and she just doesn't know what I'm talking about. It seems nowadays girls are obsessed with texting, TV shows, phones, and useless stuff like that. I rarely ever watch TV, and I rarely carry my phone. I like talking about bigger things. Like conspiracy theories, science, spiritual stuff, politics, etc. All the girls I meet don't care about any of that.I rarlyMeet smart grl (link)
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Ok sweety, to be blunt here, you're not like the boys at your school and the girls you know don't represent the entire female population.
And here's a secret theres a huge gap between 16 and the early 20's, when a girls 16 she wants the popular bad-boy type to live the life of the girls on tv, but in a few years time, you'll be so high up the social ladder the very same girls will be wishing they paid you attention, and you will be meeting smart girls with the same interests at college/university, you just have to put yourself out there.
My final little piece of advice is this, I just turned 19 and until earlier this year I had never had a boyfriend/kiss/hug or anything like that, it's not rare and nothing to be ashamed of, 16 is an age to have fun with friends, not be worrying about relationships, trust me at that age it's just not worth it, wait to meet the right girl and keep being you until you find her and remember, she doesn't have to be smart like you want, she could like you for you and be nothing like you expect, just be open minded to people and be friendly and if they ask you about your interests tell them little things, rather than a whole novel :) the more these girls talk to you the more they'll like you. be patient, everything happens for a reason after all ;)
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I have been married for almost 20 years,I have 3 kids with my wife.Recently my wife has had a relationship with a younger guy who live just down the road from our home.She prommised that she would not see him again,but I have seen tem together recently-she is still seeing him.
She met him at our local Bar where we socialize most weekends.
The humiliation has been unbearable as everybody in our village knows about this affair,I was the last person to find out.
My question is this :
What should I do, I know this is a strange question,I'm unable to make a decision as my head is in such a mess.
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Hey, I am sort of able to understand how you feel, or at least your children, as my father has just left us for another younger woman who he took to the local social area's and everyone knew about except my mum etc etc.
I can't tell you what to do but in my experience at watchig relationships, if they get caught and go back to the same person again and again that's a really bad sign, it means either a). they know they can get away with it or B). they genuinly feel stronger for this other person than you.
In the end of the day, your wife was in the wrong and it is your decision on if you stay and trust her or you leave and find a new love. Your children will obviously be upset at this point (I assume they know now) though they may not show it, particularly if they are older, but they will understand if you can't make it work, you just have to be patient with everyone.
Your wife also may not have been doing this to spite you, she may have developed feelings for this man but still love you in which case I'd recommend you take a small break and go on dates again and give her a chance to choose if she wants you or this man, equally, she could be bored of your relationship entirely and be looking for fun
There is a lot of things to consider before making decisions on such a tender subject and my heart goes out to you at this time, Please be careful though, talk to your wife and try to understand what made her leave and talk to your children and ask them if they understand the situation that you are all in. good luck x
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I have a question and its for both guys and girls. Would you date someone or be with them if they've had sex friends before?
Ive only been with one girl before and i waited till i was in love and saw a future and all that stuff but now (im in college btw) it seems like EVERYBODY is with a f buddy. Im all for love but sometimes it just takes too long to find it; so im asking girls and guys that have been in loving serious relationships would u date someone thats had f buddies before? Please put gender and age, thank u (link)
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19f
Honestly, it depends, on the person and the history, everyone has had sex or some experiences but you have to chose what you accept and don't. If you have sex with the same person each time but not in a relationship I'd accept that so long as you stopped when we started dating (in fact when it was clear there was a spark from the talking id expect it to stop). That scenerio is fine because it's essentially a relationship, however, someone who just slept around with several people, I'd avoid them, at least sexually.
personally though, I wouldn't have a f buddy, sex isn't everything and it isnt the be all and end all, just have fun and do whatever feels right for you :)
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Hi, im 17 turning 18 and i'm a black female. I've always been interested in dating outside my race because i've always been curious to know what it's like to date a white guy. I live in South Florida and it's not easy to get a white boy's attention (well for me) i know im pretty but what is it? What do i do to catch a white boy's attention if there is a difference. How do most of them feel about black girls anyway? (link)
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Just be yourself, you will attract a guy by being who you are and that's the basis of a good relationship. I'm white and dating a black man and from what I gather from my white male friends they wouldn't feel any differently regardless of race, they just look for their kind of personality and general look, so just be yourself and walk proud :)
Best of luck :) x
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I HATE MY LIFE ! 13 yr old girl. Okay soooo all of my relationship questions have been about the same guy . Well we went out 3 times the 3rd time i broke up with him and i am a dumb ass for doing that ! And i realize that i cant be without him and i am trying not o pick up a knife and cut my arm up but truthfully thats where im headed i need advice as soon as possible ! Can someone just tell me what to do please im on my last thread of string :( (link)
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At 13 I don't believe this is a very thought out approach to a break up, did you honestly expect to remain with the same guy until death did you part? That almost never happens, variety is the spice of life so live and let go, it was a simle relationship which taught you how relationships work and soon enough a new guy will show interest and win you over and this guy though he may always be important to you if he is the first man you loved/felt strongly for, will take a back seat to the men you begin to care about. Relax, have girly nights in with your friends, watch comedians and funny programmes (don't watch sad/love films because they don't really cheer you up) and enjoy yourself :)
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