I like to help people so feel free to ask me for any advice :) I'm not a font of all knowledge but I can offer honest realistic advice.
Other than that I'm just a student who likes having fun and playing games.
Gender: Female
Location: England
Occupation: Student
Age: 18
Member Since: May 7, 2011
Answers: 111
Last Update: January 8, 2013
Visitors: 7849
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I'm 13 and I have started my period but I'm the flattest person in my class!!!!.( other than the boys ) and I wouldn't be caught dead stuffing my bra!!!.......people are teasing me all my friends are B cups I'm a 32 A is there anything I can do about this!!!!? (link)
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Hey, trust me I'm flat too! haha probably only a tiny bit bigger than you and I'm nearly 21 and I got all that teasing as well, just ignore them because I'll let you in on a secret. We are actually the lucky ones!
All my boyfriends have adored my boobs because there still big enough to play with but they are still nice and firm. When we get older there won't be any "saggyness" from us, nothing too noticable at least. It's a pain at a young age to deal with all the jokes and you will probably grow to a B cup or a larger A cup at least while your maturing. just ignore them all and think ahead :) as my current boyfriend said
"They may look nicer when they have a bra on but smaller boobs are always nicer."
Goodluck x
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Me and my ex broke up just over a year ago, I broke up with him, not for any particular reason, I just didn't really want to be with him any more as I found our relationship had become a bit boring. I wanted to remain friends, but he claimed to find the break up very hard and cut off all connections to me (deleting my number, removing/blocking me on all social networking sites etc) until out of the blue about 2 months ago he sent me a message asking how I was doing. After deliberation I decided not to reply. Me and him know quite a lot of the same people, and I always hear things he's said about me, however I always hear very different things, for example ill hear from one person that hes still obsessed with me and hear from another that hes told them him and myself were never really anything special. Since we broke up, he hasn't really played on my mind at all and I've been very happy, but he is now with someone else, and all of a sudden after all this time he's playing on my mind. I am starting to feel I maybe should have replied to his message, however the other half of me is telling me I don't need him and could find someone better. He has been in my dreams for the last 3 nights, and has never been before. I guess i'm a bit jealous. I just don't really know whether I do still have feelings for him or it's just an initial common jealousy that all people get when their ex meets someone new. I don't really know what to do next? (link)
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This is a typical case of "I want what I can't have." before, you heard little stories and thought you were in the driving seat of the whole situation, now that he has moved on you realise you weren't quite where you were hoping you would be and it's set you on a back-track if you will.
Let's face it, your story just says the relationship ran it's course. No hard feelings, nobody hurt anyone else, just it had done and you were happy with it being like that. Most often this is the case, sometimes you find you just need a break and things get better again, but you usually would be upset and miss your boyfriend during this break, sounds like you genuinely just wanted to move on to the next stage in your life, and that's fine.
My advice is to just carry on, don't spoil things for him, he moved on and is happy now. You just focus on work/school and enjoy YOUR life, meet someone new who excites you and then when you make peace with your ex having a new gf perhaps you can meet her and even be her friend, if not then no worries, your not expected to like the new women, that's a given, and the new women don't tend to like the ex. Women are very territorial lol.
As I said, just forget about this situation and carry on with your life how you want to live it.
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I'm Muslim I'm not a virgin. I need to find a way to bleed on my wedding night. It's a culture thing. Don't talk about trust please. (link)
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I can't think of anyway that would make sense without secretly cutting yourself I guess and I think that's a pretty bad idea.
Not everyone bleeds, maybe you could be one of those girls who doesn't? some of my friends didn't bleed, just act very surprised I suppose
Best of luck x
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I'm 16 and I'm a female my boyfriend just turned 29 and we have been together almost 7 month on the 18th and we are both Christians so we believe and agree that we shouldnt have sex til we are married but my friends hate him because he is white and is 29 they try to tear us apart and sometimes they tell me that its Either them that I let go of or my boyfriend but I don't know what to do?! By the way my boyfriend promised me and my mother that he isn't in this relationship to get in my pants that he wants to wait until marriage... what do I do? How do I keep them both?! (link)
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You're boyfriends being the good guy here. Age is just a number and race is just a factor of pigments on the skin, what rubbish criteria to judge someone on, right?
You're friends are being unfair to you, they want to break you up because they don't agree with your choices, and I've been there, but just point out, a true friend would stand by you, even knowing full well where it'll lead, just so they can catch you and hold you up when they get to be proven right.
(I'm not saying they're right, just that's how a friend should be regardless.)
Now for some honest truth. You're 16, I have lost touch with almost ALL my friends from when I was 16, just because we went to different universities, got on with our lives and met other people. If they say it's them or your happiness, the choice is obvious, don't sacrifice yourself for other people, especially when they clearly won't do the same for you. Talk to them and explain why they are wrong, tell them they are not being good friends and if they don't change, YOU walk away.
Best of luck x
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I really need advice from someone who knows a lot about pets, please I don't want any answers that are just "good guesses". Two weeks ago, I adopted a ten week old kitten. I also have owned an indoor rabbit for a year, but he is almost two years old. Both animals are male. The cat fights with the rabbit, which is a given, as cats are predatory animals. I cannot tell how the rabbit feels about the cat. I keep the rabbit locked in his cage when I am not home, and when I sleep. When I let the rabbit out he does his mostly normal business, and the kitten tries to play with him, pawing and pouncing at him. The rabbit does run, but not to his cage, just a couple feet away. Sometimes the rabbit will approach the cat. I’m not sure if this is out of curiosity or playfulness, but once the rabbit approaches the kitten it’s game time. To me, the kitten seems too aggressive with the rabbit. So I have the following questions which are all related to the cat and the rabbit. Also, I do plan on getting the cat fixed and declawed for the safety of my rabbit.
How do I know when I need to step in and interfere with their fights and teach the kitten that playing is okay, just not too rough?
How can I bond the cat and the rabbit?
The cat has been entering the rabbit’s cage anytime I am not in the room, even if just for a second, the rabbit doesn’t seem to mind, but I read online that the cat should not enter his territory. The rabbit doesn’t seem to mind the company, but his feelings are kind of hard to read. Is this okay?
Sorry if this is too long, I wanted to make sure that I included enough information.
(link)
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Hey there, I have had kittens for a while now and we have had alot of practice at introducing species :)
Firstly declawing the cat is a good idea, just in case things get a bit out of hand. To bond them, the pet you've had longest gets the driving seat really. you should hold the kitten, let the rabbit come to you and have a sniff, once they both seem at ease around each other use a small room where you can see everything and just let them play, put some toys down for the kitten to keep amused. Make sure you are ALWAYS around.
The point about the cage is that like humans, animals like a "secure spot" it's sort of like us being chased home by someone, finally getting in and finding another stranger waiting for us, or at least someone leaving a mark they had been in our house. Scary. So yeah, the rabbit may not mind atm but it could distress him if he needs some peace, remember, the cat will smell like a predator to him as well. For this reason I'd try and keep the kitten away.
Fighting is interesting though, we have cats and dogs, they can look after themselves easily enough and the dogs know best. A cat and a rabbit is a bt different as you have a genuine food chain now. I've seen rabbits and cats get along fine, usually house-cats. Now, it's the cat you need to watch out for, and they have some good tell-tale signs of when to step in.
If you know what the "hunting" pose looks like, crouched down a small distance away from the rabbit bum up in the air slightly and the paws ready to pounce at the right time, would be a time to pick up kitty and lock him/her away for a bit with some toys, of course, that's an extreme.
The problem is, cats are hard to train. they do as they like, and often, they get carried away playing, claws come out by accident and instinct takes over to "scratch and bits" just cos, well, they're cats haha
My best advice would be, as the owner, you know your pets best. You will recognise bunny getting scared, agitated or nervous, this equally plays on kitties instincts. Do what you feel is best, and use treats as well, when they play nicely, or leave each other alone more or less, reward them both. feed them together, keep them together, and your kitten should see the rabbit as a sibling more than prey :)
Hope that helps, and best of luck x
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Hi.. I'm 19 years old and I've been sexually active for approximately 6 months now. In this 6 months I took the morning after piLl thrice already. I know it's not a form of contraception but my boyfriend hates having sex with a condom and there's no way I can get the pill or be on the injection without my parents tripping. I was just wondering what's the worst that could happen if I keep using the morning after pill this much... Will it affect me trying to fall pregnant in the future? (link)
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It's not a good thing to do, It's not even that affective, like, you should have it 24 hours after unprotected sex, any longer and it really becomes quite pointless.
That's why theres the pill and things, now I was worried about what my parents would say (although, they never need to find out in England, you can go and get it done and they need never know) If you HAVE to tell them though, just say what I said:
The Pill controls your hormones, alot of my friends went on it for this reason and I needed to as well to be totally honest, my periods were very irregular and could last from longer than a week to a few days, it drove me mad not knowing when it would come and being unprepared so I asked to go on the pill, simply because it controls your periods better, I can tell when it's coming now easily :)
If that excuse won't work for you, alot of girls claim that the pill helped with their period pains as well, you don't have to tell your parents the true reason for your desire to be on it, these are innocent reason which could still be honest if your period causes you problems as well.
On a side note, not many men like condoms, make sure you are totally certain he has no std's since thats what condoms are really there to protect us from more so than pregnancy. :) Goodluck x
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I am a communication major and might get a degree in nursing. If i move to England, can I get a job there, or would it be better to study there?
thanks very much! (link)
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Yep, were not that fussed! UK and USA have more or less the same standards, it only is damaging to your chances if you don't study in a decent play you know? So yeah you'll be fine :) I must warn you though! If you live in a warm part of US be prepared for some very chilly nights and unpredictable weather xD
best of luck x
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Can somebody please tell me about an legit online job that you know about I'm 18 and I want one so bad so please help! Thanks in advance! (link)
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A few of my friends get paid for youtube videos, great job imo haha
Some do mmake up tutorials so they get sponsored by a brand and they give demos and reviews on the products (plus get free stuff!). The one who seems to make the most money off of it just makes funny videos though, nothing difficult he just talks about life and makes people laugh.
Thats the only job I can think of, I'm sure they're more but in this economy it's hard enough to find a real world job so don't get your hops up too much :)
goodluck
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I've been with my boyfriend for over 2 years and his parents ( his mom especially) doesn't even like hearing my name. She changes the topic each time her son mentions my name. I've never met her. I don't think she'd want to see me to have a normal conversation so I was thinking maybe writing a letter?
I feel this is the only way I can reach her
Please advise
I'm 25 bf is 29
He's White and I'm Black (link)
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Ah I know the feeling! My roles are reversed however, being the white girl with the black boyfriends my family have never cared for. I feel like it is the same race issue with you as our generation is really the first to fully appreciate diversity; before it was practically a crime to fall for anyone who didn't look like you. Unfortunately the older generations still have that mindset and it does make mixed relationships hard.
The best thing to do is let your boyfriend handle it, be prepared to make the best impression possible! I speak from experience but my family has this image of an over controlling man with a chequered past and a criminal record! Not really accurate but they go by the media tbh so I'm sure (though you're lovely) they have their stereotypical image of you as well which i'm afraid you have to work hard at to prove them wrong.
See if your boyfriend has one family member who will accept you and help get you in with the rest. For me my mother decided to meet my boyfriend and now she will defend him to my grandparents telling them he's actually very sweet and they should meet him. If your boyfriend has a sibling or close relative that is willing to give you the chance go for it. Obviously you want his mother to like you but she may need convincing by a few people first.
The more people you can win over with your charm and love for your boyfriend the better standing you'll have. I'm sure it won't be easy for you but you can always turn to your boyfriend when it gets too much, he's going through it with you as well :) And don't complain about his mother being closed minded, tell them it upsets you as expected but all you can do is hope she will give you a chance to prove to her the kind of woman you are :)
Goodluck! xxx
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Well basically there is this guy at my skl and he's asked my best friend a couple of times if I would give him head,or a hand job ,so after skl my friend deliberately planned for us all to play dirty dares( basically 21 dares but the dares are sexual) and she sort of kept bringing up that this boy wanted me to wank him off, to sort of force us into it anyways so he got all shy coz he thinks his dick is too small etc. But he says he wants to do it and I sort of want to but he has a girl friend in another school and he wants me do it in the park? If I did do in the woods in the park and he has a girl friend would this make me a slut? And did I mention I'm only 13 and so is he we only just got into yr 9 , any tips on hand jobs? (link)
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Well to begin with I get the feeling you don't know if you should in the first place, and clearly your friends are making a decision for you or at least pushing you towards that direction.
It's entirely your choice, One way will gain you a lot of self-respect and possibly being called "frigid" if these people are not nice. Another may give you a fun story for a few years but I'm sure "Slut" will be brought up as well, if not by anyone else by the girlfriend and her friends if anyone ever were to find out.
Consider this before making any choices though: You are young and so is he I doubt he truely loves this girl he's with but he has committed himself to a relationship which he clearly doesn't care about. That isn't your fault obviously but would you be happy with yourself knowing you played along with his game? This girl will be hurt either way. It's also not great for the future, when you meet a man you love and you start talking about silly things from your childhood he could be very put off for a total disregard for another girls feelings and it would hint at your own opinions that cheating is okay if you never get caught.
I'd not do it personally, it's your choice and I don't want to preach but I do want you to consider these things before doing something you could regret.
Goodluck
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Okay, I have a pretty messed up life and I've been abused mentally and physically by my parents and other kids, in that order. I'm 12 years old and have depression and PTSD. I am required to see a councilor by my school. Take into consideration that these are very little details of what actually goes in my life. Whenever I get sad, I cut, write in my diary, and then I listen to really sad music and write poems for hours. Is this an abnormal way of responding? (link)
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It isn't abnormal, rather usual actually but it is damaging to a degree; I'm studying to be a therapist so I'll do my best to help here though I have just begun my course:
I'm going to assume your poems and music don't cheer you up, if they do then by all means continue and have no need to read on, if they don't then feel free to do so lol:)[I'd like to add here that everyone has a hobby so even if they don't cheer you up, but you enjoy them, carry on doing them as much as you wish, don't let anyone tell you your 'strange' or whatever because you have something you enjoy]
I suppose one word is it is maladaptive behaviour; behaviour you have learnt which isn't helping your situation and puts you in a negative spiral if you understand that? basically, let's say someone pushed you which upset you, you then dwell on that thought with your behaviours and slowly remember other similar occurrences which builds up to a very demanding emotion. Some people would then turn to self harm as a form of shifting the emotional pain we are not good at dealing with to a physical one which we are.
If we look at Freud, he would claim that this is your defence mechanism to the world, so your "id" and "ego" are struggling to contain themselves and the pressure is forming itself in a maladadaptive behaviour.
That's just a very brief idea of what certain psychologists have said, obviously you feel you have a tough life and all the events have clearly played their part in it but the trick is to now gain control of your life, I realise that is difficult for a young person as yourself but it is do-able with small changes to your behaviour people will perceive you differently. Talk to your counsellor and get things off your chest, don't be afraid to cry and be totally honest, as that's really the only way they can help you and trust me, nobody takes these jobs if they don't have a genuine desire to help.
Also, as far as your parents abuse, talk to your counsellor about this as well, don't be afraid as all adults who work with children are trained to handle these situations and your safety is everyones top concern. Best of luck and don't be so hard on yourself! You'll always have a friend somewhere :)
xxx
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it really sucks to see your friends act lovey dovey with their mutual crushes/boyfriends when the furthest your love life has ever gotten is just having crushes (that you don't know are returned). it's just confusing because I don't think it's a fault on my looks.. there's nothing I'd change about my appearance. people with far less looks have been on dates and all that, and I get complimented pretty regularly. not being conceited or anything, just being honest, cause normally when you say you've never been kissed at like 18 you'd think it's cause they're not good looking or something. It just makes me insecure because I really don't know what to think.. I've never seriously been asked out and its not that I'm not friendly or anything, either. I'm just wondering what I'm doing wrong. I have friends who've been doing the whole boyfriend thing since somewhere between ages 11-16. I hung out with some friends today and it was like there were two couples (they're just at the crush stage, though) and I was the odd girl out. we watched a movie and they were like snuggling and it just made me feel sad I've never had anyone like that, when my girl friends have. one of my friends has guys hitting on her all the time, and it's not like she looks like a model or anything, either. it's just frustrating. i told them about how I was still a lip virgin and they said it was a good thing and they wish they could be in my position, but I don't get how. there's nothing fun or good about not being with someone for so long. nothing at all. it really hurts, the times when you just want to kiss someone or someone to just love you in that romantic way. its hard to imagine all those romance movies or movies with any romance being in reality.. it's like I'm missing out on this whole other world. I'm not desperate or anything, though, but if someone genuinely asked me out and I was attracted to them, I'd give them a chance. I'm new to the world of hanging with a lot of guys cause in high school I was kind of the loner who just mixed with different groups of mainly girls. i just started college and i'm now in a group (which feels awesome, I've never been in such a tight nit clique before. I've never felt like I really belonged anywhere before with other people who genuinely wanted to be friends and shared a lot of my weird interests) but apart from the two pairs of "crushes" the two other guys are in relationships and then 1 other guy is single but I'm not attracted to him (though one of my friends considers him attractive). sorry for this huge rant but I just had to get it off my chest. I'd talk to my new girl friends about it but I don't want to be a debbie downer. they seem like they're in that state of bliss when you're crushing on someone and they know it's returned and I just envy that. I keep it inside, though, and just act like normal, though, but it deep down hurts cause it just makes me feel alone again. I even liked one of the guys who's crushing on one of my girl friends in my group (there's 3 of us, me included) until I realized that he liked that one girl. I still find him attractive and we strangely have way too much in common (even more than he does with that girl he fancies) but I'm trying to just let it go and just be friends since I guess he just wants to be friends with me, but it's just hard. and I wouldn't try anything now that my friend likes him back, which she admitted after i told her i wasn't really into him anymore in that way (which was a lie, but the signs were getting obvious that he liked her). like it's just ridiculous. how patient am I supposed to be? I don't want to just use my first kiss on some random guy just cause I want to do that stuff but I do want to be loved in that way, you know. there's nothing awesome about being single at all. maybe if you've already been in relationships so you want a break, after you know what it's like, but especially not after you've gone through your teenage years with NOTHING and you feel hormones and what not a lot. sometimes i wish i could just turn off those feelings and just focus on the important stuff - school, but i'm not a robot, i'm just a human who wants to be loved more than a friend, why is this so difficult (link)
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Hey there, I assure you I know EXACTLY how you feel! In fact, your story matches mine entirely haha.
Anyway, as I was in your position, please listen when I say its better to be patient! when your friends say they wish they were in your position they probably mean it, I sure would love to have met my current boyfriend before anyone else had gotten anything from me but I'd gotten so desperate to understand what was so great about relationships I just sold myself out, don't do that, trust me you'd regret it.
I have no doubts your a very attractive young woman, it isn't so much about looks as confidence and personality however, Psychologists argue that people are attracted to people that match their own looks so beautiful people go with beautiful and less attractive go with less attractive, this works for these other factors as well so fun and confident people often go for the same type of people.
It's great that you have found your own group of close friends, don't be afraid to ask the girls for a night out with just the girls, I'm sure they arn't oblivious to you not wanting to be the "third wheel" all the time and it'll cheer you up having a girly day :)
I'll tell you throughout my highschool and college life I felt like something was wrong with me for nobody to pay attention what-so-ever, but as soon as i went to university plenty of people began asking me out etc etc. I found I was just not in the right place at the time, strange isn't it? You could just be going about your own life, find yourself somewhere new and suddenly find plenty of people looking for a relationship with you! But don't thret over these things, focus on your studies and your life.
When you do find someone who you form a relationship with not only will he feel so special that he's your first kiss and whatever else you do, but he'd have a massive respect for you!
Afterall, who'd want the used charity toys when there is one still in it's packaging :)
Keep smiling your dazzling smile and don't let a lack of love life get you down, it'll hit you when you least expect it and you'll love every second :)
Goodluck x
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How do you walk in them? Do you just keep walking in them until you learn? Are 2-3 inch heels good for a beginner to wear? (link)
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In honesty you just learn as you go, there might be a stumble on the way but after a little while you can run, skip, hop and everything and look very elegant doing it! :D
As for he beginning heel, it depends on the person, my friends first pair were tiny! But she wasn't comfortable wearing anything higher, now she can just about manage the shoes me and my other friends use. My first pair was about 3 inches I believe, just make sure your comfortable and you'll get the hang of it :)
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I am a 20 year old female who has a great day life. I go to school, I work part time, I have great friends and a good family. I live at home with my parents to save money while I attend nursing school.
One bump is my mother. My mother is a sometimes functioning alcoholic. She holds a day job but at night drinks to oblivion and is just disgusting. She can't handle her booze at all, she'll go to bars and call me for a ride because she is kicked out of the bar. My mom is in her 50's so it's not normal. Her newest weakness is not making it to the bathroom, she will pee on the FREAKING floor. It's DISGUSTING. She's a mean nasty drunk and I want nothing to do with her.
I love my younger sister and my dad but he works nights and just doesn't realize the extent to which she is sick. During the day, my loving amazing mother comes back (which makes it really hard for me to try talking to her about it) but sometimes I just can't be here and she's just really nasty.
P.S. I really don't want pity or anything and I know many people have things much harder with an alcoholic parent, and I just want to figure out how to go about helping my Mom. (link)
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Hey, Addiction is a serious thing, your mother seems alcohol dependant so for every negative emotion she encounters she probably runs to some alcohol to deal with it for her.
This stems from a lack of coping abilities and needs to be dealt with asap. It may be hard to talk to your mum at first so confront your dad and tell him what she's like when he's at work, and, if your younger sister is old enough to join in, have the whole family sit down and tell her you want her to get help with the problem.
Also, as for it "not being normal" at 50, there really isn't a "normal" age for alcoholism, binge drinking is often for teenagers and young adults, but actual alcoholism is often more common in adults (due to stresses/midlife crisis etc.). As the person above said, try and get professional help from a local AA or equivalent.
It will be very hard, especially for your mother, but if she wants to change she will manage with your support :)
Goodluck x
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Today my mom came home at lunch angrier than a bull. That isn't really abnormal she usually has crazy mood swings about once a week and everybody who knows her thinks she has some sort of bipolar disorder. Today though she was just completely ridiculous and said some things I don't think I'll ever forget.
The first thing that really bothered me was that she brought up something I posted on facebook FOUR years ago. I posted a status about her driving her me crazy (which I think is normal for a very stressed honors student (freshman at the time) after a fight with their mom. He called her and told her that "I was saying very bad things about her on facebook" (he was 28 at the time). Of course she was very angry at the time she found out (which she had a right too) but come on it's 4 years later now...
Today she brought it up again and said "I'll never in my life forgive you for doing that! No normal child would ever do such a thing and I'm going to hate you for that forever!" I understand if she was talking about something I did today but like I said FOUR years ago a stupid facebook comment and she's never going to forgive me for it?! Isn't that a little out of line?
The second thing was when she said "The only reason I've kept you underneath my roof all of these years was because I knew if I didn't your father would take me back to court and try to take away my child support money!" That just hurt. She pretty much said she doesn't love me at all and that she's just using me for money.
The third thing she said was "I didn't sign up to take care of you for your entire life! I shouldn't have to do a damn thing for you ever again! You're 18 now and you've been out of school since June! You should have a job and be out of my house and you should have repaid me for everything I ever bought you for gifts by now! I want all of that money back. You owe me for every cent I've ever spent on you! I've had close to enough of this and I will throw you out on the street! You think I give a damn? You and your stupid f*cking friends that you text will all become homeless and I'll laugh at all of you! Every adult in the world hates all of you teenagers! That's why we're not giving you jobs! WE HATE YOU AND WE'RE LAUGHING AT YOU! YOU'RE ALL GOING TO BE HOMELESS HAHAHAHA!"
Again I think that was totally out of line. It's not like I'm not looking for a job. I've filled out 300+ applications and walked door to door in plazas in my best formal attire in 100 degree heat looking for a job in the past month since I turned 18 (August 14th) and really? ALL of the adults in the world hate every single teenager? You're all just around to turn us away and laugh at us? I'm sure that's totally what you're all doing. (Sarcasm)
Later that day I went out on the porch to have silent time alone to just cry it out but she must have heard me because not 15 minutes later she walked out and I had my cellphone in my hand in the middle of sending a text to a friend who was making me laugh and she pointed at it and said "Because of that stupid thing we will never have a real mother daughter relationship!"
Idk why but those couple things really cut me more than anything she's ever said to me before.
I don't want to forgive her again and I don't think I can. I can never do anything right in her eyes. She hates everything I do and always tells me how much she hates me and how worthless she thinks I am. I don't get it because I have friends that all tell me how amazingly nice and funny they think I am and all of my teachers have always liked me and called me a sweetheart. I've volunteered with children and I'm a good kid. I'm still a virgin, I only dated once. I never did drugs or drank or partied. I've stayed in my entire life and tried to be good. I just don't think I can make myself like her again. I couldn't even make myself say I love you which I usually do every night before she goes to bed. I just feel so sick about her now. I want to just cry. She's the only person who's ever made me want to kill myself repeated times (though I've never self harmed and I would never actually do it I love life too much). (link)
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Wow. That sure is alot to handle for a young person as yourself, hell it's alot for anyone to handle!
You sound like a lovely person, respectable with strong morals, that's a rare thing these days and you should be proud of yourself!
And no, even though I'm not much older than you I'm sure that adults don't hate teenagers, I think it might be more something to do with the terrible economy all over the world! (haha)
You said you're mother often has mood swings, is she bipolar? or have some sort of mental illness? If so, it doesn't really "excuse" her behaviour but it might explain it better.
I can hardly blame you for struggling to forgive her after all of that, especially if she didn't apologise, perhaps wait until she is in a calmer mood and mention these things to her, tell her they hurt and see if she can justify herself or at the very least give you an honest sincere apology!
A mothers job is for a lifetime however, My own mother turns to my grandmother constantly for support, it's their job and their responsibility. It sounds to me like you'd be better off moving out when you can, not because your a drain on your mother but just to give you the freedom to breathe!
Best of luck with this :) x
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Ok I'm 17 f and I was hanging with my two friends that are girls. My boyfriend was also there but he said I was weird because I act different with my friends and that he felt left out. My boyfriend wanted to give me a hug and kiss but I didn't let him get to lovey dovey because my friends would of felt left out. I was to bussy trying to make my two friends feel less weird by totally not being lovey dovey with my boyfriend and I guess I ignored him in a way, even though I didn't want to. Should I invite my friends when I hang with my boyfriend? Or keep inviting my friends but this time not ignore him and kiss and hug in front of my friends? I'm very akward person so sometimes I don't know what to do..
Thanks for reading!!(:
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I think you need to balance your love life and your friendships. you can't ignore one for the other as its not fair to either. Invite your boyfriend out (but not ALL the time, have your girl time as well) and when he's out with you do the more subtle things, hold his hand, sit on his lap if there's not many seats, sit close to him if there is, but keep involving everyone in the conversation.
Be thankful your friends accept him as well, it gets much worse when friends hate the boyfriend, so keep it balanced, have private time with both of them and keep them both involved in your life. It's a bit tricky at first, but once you find the balance everything fits together perfectly :)
goodluck x
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A very dear friend of mine, Ryan, was told this morning, by his ex girlfriend, Jenna, that she has HPV. Jenna has had very few partners before my friend. Her friend, Tori, was also a previous partner of Ryan's. Tori apparently knew that she had HPV shortly after she slept with Ryan which was about a year ago. Ryan never knew he had HPV until this morning when Jenna called him hysterical crying after the results of her STD exam came back positive for HPV. There is no doubt in Jenna nor Ryan's minds that Ryan was who gave Jenna and Tori HPV.
Here's the questions:
1. Because Ryan unknowingly gave these two women HPV, is he at risk for any legal repercussions?
2. If there are legal repercussions, is Tori responsible for not having notified Ryan, when she knew that he was a strong candidate for having given her the virus?
3. Does Ryan have a legal obligation to notify his past partners? If so, how far back into his sex life is he required to go back? He has slept with 16 women, the first two of which were 100% not HPV positive. A year ago, he slept with a woman who has since been tested and is negative for HPV.
4. His doctor said that the only test he can do to test Ryan for HPV is a visual wart exam. Is this true? Is there nothing else he can do?
5. How long should Ryan refrain from sexual encounters? How long can it remain in your system?
6. If one of the girls he infected with HPV develops medical problems or cervical cancer, is Ryan legally entirely to blame for that? There were times that he engaged in consensual non-protected sex.
Thank you very much for your time.
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Hi, I can't help too much with the disease information as I don't know too much about it, but generally I believe it's accepted that sex is your responsibility. The only way a legal case could be issues I presume is if one of the women claims she was raped.
Getting an STD is down to you and the partner, there's no obligation to inform someone you have a disease but it is a decent considerate thing to do. there's also no law about using protection, its entirely down to the people involved to make that decision. As for the cancer question, though he may blame himself, he wouldn't be to blame.
Don't worry about any legal issues, even if one of the girls decided to take him to court, it wouldn't be a strong case and might just be rejected on the spot :)
goodluck x
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I'm 14 and I have an older sister who is 17 care about a lot. When we were kids, we were best friends, but shes a senior in high school and in a way different group from me. My friends and I barely ever party at all/...maybe drink and smoke weed sometimes. I still love her to death, though
My sister, on the other hand met this guy from another school and started making a bunch of friends in the cocaine crowd. She's only been doing cocaine since around New Years when she started dating this guy who is a a notorious drug dealer. Last week they decided to drive down to Mexico for a "vacation". My parents thought it was fine because they are so naive. When she didn't get back when she said she was supposed to and we couldn't get ahold of her we started getting worried. Sure enough, not two hours later, we get a call from the border police saying they had her. It took my parents $1,000 to bail her out and we drove an hour and a half to pick her up.
Apparently what happened was that, their care was checked because they looked suspicious. Sure, enough they found two kilos of cocaine in the wheel well of her boyfriend's car. They were brought back to the station. I guess my sister thought her boyfriend was just going to be arrested, but they decided to do a cavity search on my sister...made her spread her cheeks and they found 15 bags of cocaine stuffed in her butthole. I don't even know it was possible that someone can fit something like that in their butt!!! The drive home was silent. SHe has court next month and is probably facing a lot of trouble.
RIght now I am in shock and don't know what to even think. I want to cry, but I can't. I will always love my sister, but she must have a drug problem if she has resorted to dating a huge drug dealer and hiding things in her rear end. What should I say to her?? Is she going to prison? Thank you for any help you can give me. (link)
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Hey, I am not too sure what the laws are like in America but over here drug smuggling is a big offence, and if the boyfriend deals as well he'll be in the most trouble. Your sister might get let off if she has a good lawyer and it is believed she was talked into doing these things because of her boyfriend but she will still receive a severe punishment I'm sure.
It sounds like she does have a drug issue and should be admitted into rehab to overcome it, the case may be that she didn't understand what she was doing at the time, or perhaps she did and didn't understand the consequences. Right now though I'm sure she would just want her sisters support, don't treat her differently, treat her like your sister and do the things you always do
Goodluck with it :) x
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Okay so here's the thing. I don't have anybody to talk to about sex. My boyfriend and I were having drysex, with clothes on. But we barely had any time, so he didn't 'come'. There was no wetting of his pants. I have heard of pre-cum however. I was wondering if there is any chance of getting pregnant due to pre-cum, as my pants were wet. (link)
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Hey, the only way of getting pregnant is if semen enters your vagina, if both of you had your clothes on I'd be 100% sure you aren't pregnant.
Men do have pre-cum which comes out while they are "enjoying" themselves, but it is still unlikely to get you pregnant. The wetness on your pants is probably from you
Women get wet when they are excited to make it easier for the man and make sex more enjoyable (hence why foreplay is very important to stopping sex from being painful)
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Okay so I'm starting eighth grade and I just got my schedual and everything. I'm yes nerous of the new school year but, who isn't? I'm excited too! But, the problem is I have barley any of my friends with me in some of my classes (I asked on facebook and very few replys) And I asked my friends who were on and they said no :( Nervous about that but, not really a BIG problem. The bigger issue is this girl named venny, me and here were friends I guess last year and still are (I think) but, she posted something saying "say it to my face" blah blah blah. Not to me but, to everyone.So I commented very nice and all some thing I don't like about her. Not specifics but you know just I don't like how she shows her body and I don't think she's christian and stuff. She comes back with all this crap about how she never liked me and called me a jealous bissh (bitch) So I told her ON HER STATUS how I don't like this and that and said how I hated she lost her virginty last year. so everyone knows now. THEN she goes messaging me in private threatening me about cyberbulling WHICH I said in defence she cursed at me first so they can't really do anything. So after a while of bickering back and forth I went to bed. Next day she asks if we wanna be friends so Im like whatever devising a secret plan about how I will take all of her secrets and tell the school. lolol jk. But, not close at least. BUT, at orientation she walked past me and didn't say anything and I just couldn't shake the feeling that she really didn't wanna be friends or changed her mind. TOTALLY fine with that! but, shes quite popular (in a way) and I don't know. she's gettoh unlike me, and she fights other girls. I don't want her to be in any of my classes either. I just don't know like how to deal with her. I guess avoiding is fine. But, I want to have a drama free year as I have to audition for this school I want to go to in highschool and I need to have good grades this year for them to make the final decisions. Thanks for reading! (link)
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Everyone's different, that's the first thing to understand. She might not be Christian, or at least not be a strict Christian, that's not a reason to dislike somebody though.
It sounds like a usual falling out, and by asking to be friends she probably meant to be civil with each other, maybe she doesn't want to be friendly, and the best way to handle it, in my opinion is one of two options.
1). sit down with her and talk everything out like adults, ask her what you did first, and explain your side of the story, don't accuse her of anything and apologise for your comment about her virginity as it clearly upset her.
2). If that fails, or just doesn't appeal to you, you could just both go your own way, don't cause conflict and just do your own things.
goodluck with everything and I hope you enjoy your school year :)
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