askSaturnMoonie
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Q: Alright so.. I'm just gonna jump right into it I guess.
throughout highschool I was in a relationship with someone that caused me a lot of pain and stress. we dated for four years and then ended on really bad terms. at the time, I thought I loved him, but in retrospect I definately did not. But I stayed with him because inside I was terrified that if I ended things, no one else would ever want me.
But eventually we did break up and to my suprise, people did want me. Lots of people in fact. I've dated around since (we broke up last April so I guess for around 10 or 11 months now) and for the most part being single has treated me really good
so good in fact that I really, really haven't been seeking a relationship at all. I'm normally very straightforward with my partners, in fact most of them know from the day I meet them that I'm not interested in being somebodies girlfriend. Just the idea of it makes me feel.. honestly physically sick. I look back on my relationship and see how twisted and poisonus it was, and how much he manipulated and controlled me over the course of those four years. I was very cut off from my friends and loved ones and it made it so hard to get out. I didn't feel valuable and I was sad all the time.
This, on top of some abuses in my childhood that I won't delve too much into, has made me really wary about every putting myself in a similar situation. I've been treated so poorly by men throughout my life & I've really reached a point of feeling like I can't trust people.
Anyways, so that brings me to my current situation. Around two months ago I started texting this guy.. we have a lot of mutual friends, and his number was in my cellphone so I just kinda randomly decided to start chatting him up. I knew who he was and had always thought he was pretty attractive and whatnot but never really gave him any thought because he was out of my league, as far as I was concerned.
But we instantly hit it off and just had so much to talk about. I really liked him right from the second I 'met' him, if you could call it that. Anyways I won't detail the whole courtship because no one wants to read that, but basically we ended up meeting, and chilling, and hooking up. It all happened very quickly and came so easily. It really felt natural and at the time soo good.
Since then, we've been seeing eachother every couple days for about a month and a half. when I see him, I normally spend the night, then most of the following day with him. we have a lot of sex (often three times per visit) and he is by far the best lover I've ever had. Plus we connect really well intellectually and we make eachother laugh constantly and everything just.. flows. There is an obvious emotional attachment that has been building up, enough that we both comment about it. Anyways, lately he has been dropping hints like crazy that he wants to be my boyfriend, and I feel like.. I should want to. Because I do want him. I can picture a future with him and I like it. I enjoy every minute of my time with him and when he goes away I feel so depressed, despite knowing I'll see him again soon. I talk to him every day, every opportunity I get, and we're constantly seeking out eachothers company and trying to align our schedules.
But I feel angry, sick, and absolutely terrified every time he says anything about a relationship. I warned him from the day we met that I didn't want one and now here he is, pressing me to be with him, and I like everything about him and I don't have an excuse but.. I just wanna run in the opposite direction as fast as I possibly can. If it were anybody else, if he hadn't already developed into a close friend and if I thought I wouldn't be destroyed if I lost him, I would have already bolted.
But all I want is for things to stay the same. And I feel him pressing and I don't know if he's gonna wait for me. And I'm not sure if I should even make him wait because he has been so great in every way, and more than I deserve, and he's soo much more attractive than me (lol I know it's shallow that it's a factor, but honestly, I couldn't have imagined that a guy like him would ever look at me. He's just so beautiful and I'm completely addicted to every inch of him and it makes it soo much harder to differentiate affection from lust..), and who knows if I'll ever find anyone so compatible to me agian? I mean I really have been blessed to meet him, and I think that sincerely. He's perfect and I just wish I could make myself fit together with him but.. I don't know how.
When I think about a relationship I still get that sickening, dreadful weight in my stomach. And when he suggests it I just feel like somethings horribly wrong and he wants to manipulate and control me in just that same way. Even though from everything I've learned about him, he would never do that and doesn't even seem to have the capacity really. It wouldn't be in his nature. He's a better person than I am in every apparent way and yet.. I can't bring myself to trust him for even a second. It's so scary because.. if someone this perfect can't change my thinking, can anyone? Am I really gonna be alone forever?
I don't want to lose him but I also don't want to be with him. And I feel like at some point he is gonna offer an ultimatum. I don't know if I should just say.. fuck it, if he isn't willing to wait then he isn't worth it, or if I should reconsider? Because I mean seriously from his perspective, I wouldn't want to wait for someone with no promise of it ever changing either, who literally feels physically sick at the aspect of a relationship with me. It isn't fair to ask. He should have everything he wants but.. part of me feels like he expects too much or I'm too little or something along those lines. I just can't imagine the relationship being anything more than stress and pain and constant anxiety over losing him.
I'm so scared that something inside me is broken for good and that I'm never going to be able to offer someone more than casual sex.
I don't want to be that girl but.. I'm so sick of being alone and I can't force myself to be close to someone, and what else is there then? Physical intimacy is the only kind I can stand.. and it's better than none at all.
I just don't know what to do. I don't know if I should cut him loose and just forget all of this and continue as I was. If I should beg him to wait. Or if I should just jump.. Because I know he's a good person, who cares deeply about me and has no apparent intention of doing anything to hurt me. Because he's quickly becoming my best friend, and I don't want to use the word 'love' so early but.. I couldn't have imagined or fantasized a better partner if I tried. He really is among the best people I've ever met, and by far the best person that I've ever been sexually attracted to. I love his mind and his way of thinking and his strength and his sincerity and.. I just wish I were better somehow, and this came easier. But ever since it started getting serious it's been nothing but stress and late-night crying and watching shitty love movies, as far as I'm concerned. :P If a relationship is good, then why does the mere idea make me feel so very very bad? It's like someone puts a plastic bag over my head, and I just feel suffocated and blind and scared beyond explanation..
So uhh yea, what should I do? :P
It's completely understandable that you feel this way. I mean, four years in an abusive relationship is a long time. Not to mention the previous abuse.

This is a really delicate situation. I will tell what I know from what you've posted:

1. It's not just lust. Yes you like his body and you think he's attractive, but that's not all you were raving about. You talked about him as a person and the time you too spend together.

2. The word "girlfriend" or "relationship" has a bad meaning in your mind. You panic when he uses it. But ask yourself this: If you were to give in and let him give you the title of girlfriend, what exactly would change in your current relationship with him? Because to me, it sounds like you're already in a relationship with the guy, you just havne't made it official yet. Think about that.

You're right in not expecting him to wait for you forever, but you're also right that he should wait. You said you told him from the beginning you didn't want anything serious, but does he know the reason? Maybe you should sit him down and explain it to him. After that, there's gonna be a bit of compromising from both of you. He may need to take things slow and maybe give you a little bit more time, and you may need to jump in and agree to slowly ease into the girlfriend position.

But like I said before, it sounds like you and this guy are already serious. The title just scares you. Sometimes fear grips us in such a way that we are incapable of doing much of anything else. We rationalize our descisions and make excuses. Don't let your fear ruin what could possibly be the best relationship of your life. Let him help you. Just because you have to jump in doesn't mean he can't be right beside you holding your hand when you do.

Good luck!

Q: so i met this guy at a party. actually, i didn't even meet him. we didn't really even speak a word to each other hah but he was only there for a little. somehow he ended up getting on my camera, i guess someone took a picture of him so i added him on facebook. he messaged me and then we exchanged numbers and starting texting alot. he's kinda been flirting a little and we're supposed to hang out soon. are there any ways to not make things awkward? we've never talked in person and i'm not a real "meet someone online kinda person" if you know what i mean so i don't really know how to play it lol so i would loovee any help or advice
Have you spoken on the phone? You should! That way you get the first conversation out of the way and you don't have to be in front of him.

After you've spoken a few times, things will be less awkward when you meeet.

Please remember, you still don't actually know this guy. So meet some place local with lots of people around.

Be safe, and have fun!

Q: I have a great girlfriend, one I've been going out for nearly three years now. We have never really fought or argued or been mad at each other or anything. We both have problems here and there with school and home, but small ones with each other. I do need advice on that though...See, my teacher once told me two years ago that most if not all guys will hear a girl tell her problem and then go to try and solve it, when really the girl just wanted him to listen and hear her out. Is that true? Sometimes I find myself doing that, even after thinking about what my teacher said. So my question is...does being a listener and just talking about a problem count just as much as trying to come up with a solution. For these kinds of problems I mean things like: yeah my friends did this to me; I'm not sure what to do about this sport; I feel a certain way when ___; etc. It does seem that half the time she tells me something, I right away try to come up with a solution or tell her what to do about it. It usually ends up falling right back in my face, or making her feel upset. Would you (girls) appreciate it more if the guy that was there...helped out with a solution, just listened to you about it and talked to you about it, or a little of each. Thanks, I would really appreciate it.
Being a listener in my opinion, counts more. I had a boyfriend back in high school that always tried to come up with a solution to my problems. This really irritated me, it made me feel like I wasn't capable of coming up with a solution. What's more, if I'm telling him my problem it means that at the moment I cannot find a solution and I'm frustrated. So all he's doing (in my eyes) is belittling me. Like I can't come up with the solution...when in all probability I've already tried what his suggesting. And then there were times when I told him that I'd already tried, and he'd just say something along the lined of "well maybe you did it wrong, or you should try it again like this...etc" And that REALLY pisses me off.

But that's my personal opinion, your girlfriend could feel differently about it. You might want to consider asking her if it annoys her, and that way you'll know. But I think it's great that you're asking, and that you want to make the effort. More guys should do this. :)

Q: I'm in the eight grade and I'm a 14 year old female. Some boys think that i am pretty. But I haven't had my first kiss yet. I want my first kiss to be spectacular, something that I will remember forever.
I feel really left out because all of my friends have had their first kiss and more. I just want to know the ages of people when they got their first kiss and details (like where, how, etc.) it will make me feel better. Thank you in advance!
I was 17 when I got my first kiss. Um it was weird, I wasn't expecting it. I was in my boyfriend's attic (we had been dating for about a week), we had just finished studying, and he was going to walk me home. Well I got up, and was putting my coat on, and talking to him about something, and he just came in front of me, and shoved his tounge down my throat! I mean, it was really unexpected, I was in the middle of a sentence, and I'm really shy so I could've died. After that I was running around thinking oh my god, oh my god that was such a horrible kiss, he's gonna think I'm a horrible kisser. Needless to say, I wasn't ready, but it's kinda funny lol.

Q: So I want to surprise my girlfriend with a very meaningful gift- like at 5pm today when she gets off work. Any original ideas? (I've done the CD and such)

Thanks.
Her fav. flowers
Stuffed animal (her fav. animal)
Chocolates
Write her a poem
Write her a song
Romantic dinner
Meet her at the door with nothing on...lol...is any of this helping?

Q: As part of my aniversary present to my boyfriend i am writing a love alphabet,
"I love you because you are..."
Adorable
Beautiful
Caring etc...

i'm stuck for what to put for Q, V and Z

any ideas?
Thank you x
Quality A meat (lol that's funny, but cute..u could take the meat out, add something else or just leave it at quality a)

Vivacious
Vital (concerned with or necessary to the maintenance of life)
Veracious (truthful, honest)
Virtuous (morally excellent)

Zealous (filled with or characterized by zeal)
Zest (an enjoyably exciting quality)

That's all I got, hope it helped.

Q: so valentines day is coming up and i dont know what to get my boyfriend of 2 and a half months. has 15 and im 14 so i dont want to get him anything sexual ya know. so what are some good things i can get him? i rate high.
Well this may sound a lil bit silly, but have you thought about getting him a stuffed animal? Does he like any specific animal, that you may be able to get him? I had a boyfriend back in high school who loved monkeys, and so I got him a stuffed monkey once. He loved it so much, that even after we broke up, and he had a new girlfriend, he told me he still had the monkey in his bed with him when he slept. So yeah think about that.

Hope this helped, and good luck :D

Q: I'm turning 14 and for my birthday I'm having a dance. I've been going out with guy for a while now but we don't go to the same school so we haven't had any dances together. What are some good love songs that would be good for a first dance. I need as many as you can give me. This would mean a lot to me. This dance is really important. Thank you so much! I'LL RATE YOU!!!♥
Have you ever really loved a woman- Bryan Adams (although that's a bit one sided)

Everything I do- Bryan Adams

Thought I died and gone to heaven- Bryan Adams (what can I say I really like him, lol)

Always- Atlantic Star (GREAT SONG)

Love Shack- The B-52's

Here and Now- Luther Vandross

When I see you Smile- Bad English

Eternal Flame- The Bangles

Will you still love me- Chicago (One of my fav. songs)

You're the Inspiration- Chicago

Could I have this Kiss forever- Whitney Houston and Enrique Iglesia

I have nothing- Whitney Houston

I Want to know what love is- Foreigner

Ok I'm gonna stop now, just realized I gave you almost all 80's. Sorry about that, it's my fav. decade. Anyways hope this helped some.

Q: ok i like these 2 guys. we all hang out together at school. one is a sophomre and one is a senior. i like the senior more than the sophmore. me and the senior flirt constantly. me and the sephmore flirt a lot too just not as much. well i like the senior more, but the senior doesnt want a gf right now. its thats all kool. well the sophmore relizes that i like the senior more and he doesnt want to ask me out bcuz of that, i want to go out wiht him but this is the last semester i will ever see the senior again, and it would just suck if i have a bf, but i like the sophmore. and im just so confused about all of this. i dont no what to do, all my friends so go out with the sophmore. but i really like the senior and it just wont be the same between me and him if i get a bf and that will really suck so much, i just dont no what to do...???help!!!
Well, you obviously like this senior more, and your sophomore friend knows it. Why are you even thinking about putting him through that? Someone likes you, and he knows you like someone else more, and that at any moment if the senior decided he wanted a girlfriend, you'd drop the sophomore and go for the senior. How do you think that makes him feel. If you date the sophomore it's only going to be really hard for him. I'm sorry to say (and you'll probably give me low ratings, and I'm willing to deal with it, because I'm not here to get good ratings, I'm here to give people perspective) I think you're thinking about yourself, and maybe you should think a little bit more about these two guys, and whether or not your hurting them. Put yourself in the sophomore shoes, how would you feel?

Q: I am really bad at seperating boyfriends from friends. Is the only difference between having a boyfriend and having guy friends is that you can kiss and hold hands with your boyfriend? I guess I have a problem..cause I treat my boyfriend the same way as my guy friends. Does anybody have an ideas how I can let him know that I really do like him as my boyfriend? Cause I am starting to convince myself that we should just be friends. Thanks.
14/f
Well for the most part having a boyfriend is like having a guy friend that you can kiss, but it goes a little beyond that. Your boyfriend should be the one person you want to spend time with the most, he should give you those little butterflies in your stomach when he's near you, or kisses you. You should want to kiss him, and there should be a little extra romantic side to you with him. Like wanting to be alone with him, maybe cooking for eachother, I don't know, something that you both find romantic, like doing things together that only the two of you know about.

But if what you feel for him is the same feelings you have for your guy friends, then maybe it's not that you're trying to convince yourself that he's just a friend, but maybe that's how it really is. Sometimes people get confused because they associate braking up with having a problem in the relationship, and that's not always the case. You may just have friend feelings for him, but not want to hurt him.

My advice is to think about this long and hard, think about why it was you started dating him, what you felt then, what you feel now, what you would feel if you broke up, and what you would feel if he started dating someone else. You could maybe try doing something romantic together, see what you feel about that too. If you still have only friend feelings for him after all that, then you'll know what you have to do. Good luck!

Q: Ok I am a 17 year old female from nova scotia, and there is this guy i work with and i kinda like but hes new to the business but hes really nice to me and we friendly flirt. Everythings great, but the problem is i think he may be 2 years younger then me (not 100% sure) haven't asked him lol, but is it weird that i like a younger guy? Is this wrong, kinda confuzed cause i just got crushed from this other guy i liked so i dunno what to think. Thanks, i rate all 5's
I don't think it's a bad thing at all. If it's ok for a 15 year old girl to date a 17 year old guy, then why can't it be the other way around? It's not like he's 11, then that'd be a little wrong. If you like him I say go for it, you may be worrying for nothing anyways, he might be your age. Not that it matters, since obviously he can't be that immature or you probably wouldn't be interested.

Q: okay well this might seem weird to some people..but i like my little brothers (younger by 2 years) best friend. his best friend is hot, sweet, smart, GORGEOUS...all that..but i think it might be a little weird. i mean were friends and all but the thing is i dont think anything would happen since we're a different age! first of all : do you think it is weird? 8th & 6th grade. And second of all: what are some things i can do to drop hints??

THANKS!!
Ok I'll admit that is a tad weird, if you two would have been older (lets say you were 17 and he was 15), it might be less weird. You could maybe try to wait till you're both in high school. Then again, by that time you might like someone else, or he might have a girlfriend. So I guess if you really like him, and you don't have a problem with his age, and you're prepared for the comments made by other people (because, lets be honest here, people will talk about this). If you can deal with it, then go for it.

As for dropping hints, maybe you could just flirt with him a little, tell him he's such a nice sweet guy, that any girl would be lucky to have him, that you wish you had a guy like him. Stuff like that. You could also think about trying a more direct approach and just coming out and asking him if he would find it weird, and if he's interested. That's all I can say, it's really up to you to decide though.

Q: I'm feeling really low about myself because I can never seem to get a nice bf. I've been on blind dates that were disasters, and even got a new job at a store that hired 350 people to meet guys and I still havent gotten one. This is because most of the guys that work at the store are still in hs or college, and I'm nearing 30.
I know it's not me, I'm attractive, polite, funny, and sensitive. It just seems that all the guys I'm interested in just want sex, and not a permanent partnership. I also joined a church choir AND a Toastmasters, but all the men that seemed interesting were married.
My ten year hs reunion is coming up this year, and my wish is to have a nice bf to take with me. Does anyone have any ideas where I can meet some nice, AVAILABLE men?
Well I don't know if this helps, but have you tried any dating sites. There are actually nice people on there. I'm a member of a couple of them, you do meet nice people there. Of course there's also perverts, but what can one do? You could also think about what you're into, you know hobbies, and look around there. Like if you're into theater, go see a show, maybe you'll see someone there alone, you could strike up a conversation, and hey you never know. Love usually finds us in unexpected places. Don't give up though, and if you have no boyfriend for you reunion, well so what? Relationships aren't the only thing, if you're happy with your life, and your confident about yourself, be proud of who you are, don't let anyone make you feel less because you don't have a man in your life. It'll happen when it it's supposed to.

Q: hella huge problem... i have a bf. no one knows about it. we decided to keep it low. super low. but my best friend and her bf want me to date this guy that is really cool. i like him. and my bf. and then there is a freshman, that i like. but want to get to know a lil bit better. i dont know what to do. all three guys like me. but i dont know what to do. can anyone help me
Ok well you could have two different types of mentality going into this. You could say to yourself, I have a boyfriend already, and I like him, and I'm going to be loyal, and that's the end of that. Tell your friends that you're not interested at the moment for them to set you up.

Or you could think about how much you like your boyfriend, and how much you like the other 2 guys. Think about whether you're ready for a commited relationship, or if you want to date other people. Only you can know the answer to that, and if you think you aren't ready to just date one guy, then you better break it off, it's better to do that than you accidentaly cheating on him, lol. And it IS ok to want to date different people, you're young.

Q:
im confused about what to do with my ex cody, its like i get the hot and cold responses from him, so to speak. sometimes he's extrememly nice and we flirt and get along GREAT and others he seems completely shy and doesnt talk to me.

i have liked him since august (it now being january) and in august when i told him that he said he liked me too. so he kind of dragged his feet .. not sure what he wanted .. didnt know waht to do . the usual guy thing. and when i'd finally given up hope on him and me he left me a message at midnight on october 10th like three months later sayin he wanted to give us a try. only to dump me 10 days late b/c he he liked someone else .. then he told me a couple weeks later that he wouldn't have dumped me for her if she hadn't had a boyfriend ..

so that was like november .. now its january and the guy is still all i think of. i try so hard to get over him .. but like around every other corner hes either makin me fall for him again or his friends are being COMPLTELY honest and telling me stuff he says.

like shawn told me that they talk about me all the time (he wouldnt say what but he said the stuff worked in my favor) and that in our study hall (me him and cody have it together) he cant wait for me to come out and talk to them .. and i asked him to stop jokin around w/ me and he went off sayin how honest and truthful he was being ..

then new years cody called. he came and got me on his snowmobile. me and his brother and friend hung out from 9 to 3. we hung out. watched fireworks in the barn by ourselves. hung out around the bon fire. laughed constantly and flirted. i thought it went great .. i had like good hopes you know .. we fell asleep on the couch then they brought me home. he said he'd call. yeah a week and half later .. no call. we talk at school . nothing big hey and how are u kinda stuff ..

i know its probably worthless to waste my time .. and you can be completley honest in tellin me so. but like even though my head knows that .. i cant let go .. 5 months later .. jesus look at me .. in so far i cant even get out .. i've never fallen for anyone like i've fallen for cody. he tells me he can see us dating in the future but doesnt do anything about it .. i just dont know what he wants .. its like this i guess to explain it well ..
It's like a routine.
I fall for him on Monday.
I like him from Tuesday to Thursday.
He make me mad on Friday.
I think I'm over him over the weekend.
But the SECOND I see him on Monday morning
I fall for him again and again
i just dont know what to do ..

i've never felt like this for anyone but him ..

so now that i've finished my freakin book .. im sorry its soo long. i just want all the details in it .. sorry sorry sorry.
alyssa05x@aol.com .. if you need more info or something doens't make sense.
i really appreciate it and im sorry about the length .. thanks in advance
Ok first of all, I read 300 page books in a day, so don't worry about the lenght of your question, lol.

Ok so now, there are a couple of ways you can go about this. First, you could just give up on him, still be his friend, still like him, but whenever he brings up a future between the two of you, tell him straight off that it's never going to happen.

Another way you could go about this to go for it. Really go for it, be dominanat, you want to go out with him, ask him out. He didn't call you, you call him. Persue him, maybe he's just shy. Shy people tend to be outgoing when they're feeling most secure about themselves, but there are days when it's unbearable to be outgoing, especially around someone they may like, and so they shy away. (Trust me on this shy thing, I'm extremely shy)

The last thing you may want to try (last thing I can think of, there's probably way more ways though)Is to play it careful, tell him you're interested, see what he does. If he's still hot and cold with you, ask him about it. Ask him what it is he wants (does he want to just be friends, does he want a relationship, or does he just want to be friends with benefits). Either way, you need to find out from HIM what he wants, it's the best way to know for sure what he feels. After you find out his motives, take it slow, think things through, and then act accordingly. That's all I got for you, hope it helps a little.

Ok well one more thing, I know maybe you just want to stop liking him altogether, and I know it seems impossible because it's been 5 months, and you're still not over him, and you've never felt about like this about anyone before. All I can say to that is, it may take while for you to get over him, maybe even years. And it's hard, you'll cry yourself to sleep many nights, but if you feel that he's just toying with you (and I'm sorry to say some guys do this) then you need to move on. Don't show him you still have feelings for him, hide them. Take them out somehow...maybe talk to friends (although after a while they might get tired of it, lol), you could maybe write how you feel about him, in a song, or a story, or maybe a poem. The key is to not let it bottle inside, deal with it. Eventually you'll wake up and he'll be out of your mind, or someone will come along and take him out of your mind. This may not be what you want to hear, but you can't choose who you like and don't like. I was in love with one of my closest friends for 3 years, what finally got me over him was a combination of two things: I started liking this guy, and we started dating, and I liked my friend less, and then I found out my friend was gay (lol), and that really upset me, but finally I got over him. Everybody gets over everybody, it's just a matter of how long.

Q: im 15f. im falling for my best friend; weve known each other for 4 years; hes 16m

i dont knoe if he feels the same way about me n im to scared to let him no how i feel

lately hes been saying really sexual things 2 me and he wants to have sex with me; i told him maybe but im not sure

we never hang out n person becuas im always busy so we only talk on comp

do you think he just wants 2 be friends with benefits and thats all nothing more? n do you think i shuld jus give in n have sex with him if thats all hes lookin 4?
Ok first and foremost, never "just" have sex with someone. Whether you're a virgin or not, you shouldn't just give it up because they want it, it's not good for your mental health or your self esteem, plus you always risk of getting a bad rep.

Now, you say you're too scared to tell him, but the truth of the matter is, your going to have to tell him if you want to know how he feels. If it's easier to write an email, do so, maybe try writing a poem. Whatever way you feel least scared, do it, but DO IT. Ask him what he wants out of it, and decide if this is what you want too. You don't want to get in the situation where you're just friends with benefits, but you have feelings for him, and then he gets a girlfriend and cuts things off. That's really messy, then you'll really need advice, lol. So just be honest, and follow your heart, do what's best for you. And remember to keep in mind that you guys are friends, so overall make sure it's clear that no matter what happens you will still be friends.

Q: first of all, im 13 anf a girl. i like two guys. one guy have known for three years. the other is new to my school since monday. the new guy is also my teacher's son. to make it easier, lets call the guy ive known for 3 years, T and the new guy, A.
the whole week that i was in school with A, he oicked on me and always wanted me to sit by him. well i got his screen name and firday nite we started talking. in my profile it says i like somebody. he wanted to know who it was. after i awhile i told him. he told me he liked me too. we stayed up all night. he constantly flirted with me and was really sweet. i began to seriously like him. he keeps hinting that he wants me to ask him out or vice versa. but i still like T. what do i do.
now the situation with T is that i liked him for awhile. my friend asked him if he liked me and he said he was unable to answer that. i took it as a no and started to not like him so i could get over him. well it kinda worked, but i still like him. well last night we got in a fight because he told me that i liked A. well i got mad at him for sayin that. well he sent me the sweetest apology letter. in it he said that he was jealous of A and that he liked me. i sent him a message back sayin that i kinda still liked him. he said now that i also like A, he is kicking himself for not telling me earlier.
A is leaving my school at the end of this month. T will be going to high school with me. what should i do? i really like them both. but right now i think i like A more. im so confused. what should i do?
I agree w/ what the others said, go for T. You've known him longer, and have had feelings for him longer, maybe you think you like A more because it's new, and you haven't gotten used to it yet. Besides if he's moving what are the chances of a long distance relationship working out? You're both young, and he'll move on, and well T has been there before, and will be there next month, A wont.

Q: I have a boyfriend who i love with all my heart. Hes everything i want and more!! We've been together long enough to.

Anyway, before him i was in love w/ my bestfriend( a guy) and i might still have feelings for him. Now he has a gf but before when he didn't it was hard to flirt with him.

Hes still my bestfriend but i need to know how i can get away from any feelings i have from him w/o losing him as my closest friend!

Could Ya Help?
The only thing you can do is keep your feelings to yourself, in time you'll get over him, this may seem like a stupid answer, but trust me. Just like you aquired the feelings, you'll loose them, it may take sometime (and I should know, because I went through the same thing), but don't risk your friendship with him, and most importantly, don't risk your relationship with your boyfriend. In the end, it's about who you love most, and you should think long and hard...write a poem about it if you have to (it's what I did, lol). Just make sure you think everything through if you decide to do something because you might end up loosing someone special.

Q: i am 14 years old and guys just don't seem interested in me. i am a tom-boy and just seem like one of the guys to them. i flirt occasionally but don't go overboard with it. all of the boys at my school see me like their "sister" or the "girl next door" i am really good friends with a group of guys but i am afraid friends is all we will ever be. how can i get them to notice me as a girl who has "girlfriend potential" not just as a friend who is a girl? i am crushing really hard on this boy who has a girlfriend. we flirt and talk sometimes and he acts like he likes me but he is staying with his girlfriend. what can i do to get this guy to see me as a potential girlfriend and not just a friend? thanks in advance! i'll rate!
Well I'll start off by saying that boys your age are really stupid, lol. They're blind, and can't see a good thing when it's in front of them. Now if you want them to notice you, you're going to have to start making them notice you. Dress up nice once in a while...maybe once a week. Put on a dress, or just put some really cute looking jeans on. Do your hair, let them know that you're a girl, and like girl things just as much as you like boy things. That is all you could do really, because I don't think you should change who you are for them, which is why you also shouldn't change you're clothing style, but it's nice to dress up once in a while. Trust me when you're older this is a good thing, guys love girls that can be one of the guys.

Now about this guy thing, keep in mind he has a girlfriend, and I don't think you would want to break them up. But they'll eventually brake up right? lol and so make sure he notices the days you dress up. Keep flirting with him a little, especially when you dress up, and when he breaks up with his girlfriend, move in for the kill ;)

Q: ok. me and my best friend use to be completely in love with each other. then we kinda just ended it cause he got a girlfiend. but now he dumped her. and i think im falling for him again. what should i do?
Well if you have strong feelings for him, tell him, ask him if there's any chance, but make sure you don't loose his friendship in the process. Make sure he's aware of your feelings, but that if he isn't interested, you'll still be his friend. Friendship is the most important thing.

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SaturnMoonie
Hey everyone, so it's been a while since the last time I was on here...A LOT has happened w/ my life. But I am back, and I'm here to help as always. So any questions I can help you with, please don't hesitate to ask, I will answer them all as honestly as possible, and if I can't answer something I will tell you that I can't, I will NOT give you false information or lead you on.

Also, and this is something I want everyone to know: No matter what I, or anyone else advices you to do, at the end of the day it should be your decision. We're only here to give you perspective, it's up to you to decide whether or not it is the best thing to do. (That was my little disclaimer :D) Feel free to contact me anytime, day or night.

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