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giving up on love
I'm feeling really low about myself because I can never seem to get a nice bf. I've been on blind dates that were disasters, and even got a new job at a store that hired 350 people to meet guys and I still havent gotten one. This is because most of the guys that work at the store are still in hs or college, and I'm nearing 30.
I know it's not me, I'm attractive, polite, funny, and sensitive. It just seems that all the guys I'm interested in just want sex, and not a permanent partnership. I also joined a church choir AND a Toastmasters, but all the men that seemed interesting were married.
My ten year hs reunion is coming up this year, and my wish is to have a nice bf to take with me. Does anyone have any ideas where I can meet some nice, AVAILABLE men?
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SaturnMoonie's right. Dating sites work quite well. I met my wife through one.
I'd suggest trying two sites: one for a hobby or interest area that you really enjoy, and a more general one. Don't go with anything that charges much. Personally, I used Match.com and I was quite happy with the results.
Of course there ARE users and liars out there, and you DO need to be careful, but a dating site is a good way to really get to know someone before the whole physical issue comes up. The disadvantage is that you won't be able to assess the personal chemistry you have with someone else - there are things that can't be judged well online or over the phone - but at least you'll have a good chance to get to know someone first.
Please don't panic yourself over the reunion. If you let that push you into grabbing someone, you'll probably regret it. You'd be using them, just as much as the men who want nothing but sex want to use you.
By the way, there are a lot of women out there who are the same way - just interested in sex. It's important to be very careful: never tell anyone anything that you wouldn't tell a stranger on the street. Get a free email account (on Gmail, say) and use that exclusively for your dating site activity. Never give your real name or address or phone number until you're really sure that the other person is genuine.
When you get to the real name stage, Google that person and see what you can find. When you meet, make sure to meet in a very public place, and DON'T go anywhere private. Stay calm, and don't settle for someone who isn't right.
At your age it's easy to get panicky and grab the first tolerable man who comes down the pike. Remember that EVERYONE has some unpleasant aspects, things that they'll keep from you at first; those don't have to be deal-breakers, but you need to assess them dispassionately.
I'd suggest looking for someone who can make you laugh, and that you can MAKE laugh. If you share a similar sense of humor, you already have a lot in common.
Take your time. Be choosy. You may have to date a few different guys before you meet the right one...to be honest, you may have to date MANY different guys. But stay calm, listen to your heart, and in time you'll find the right person for you.
Good luck!
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Well I don't know if this helps, but have you tried any dating sites. There are actually nice people on there. I'm a member of a couple of them, you do meet nice people there. Of course there's also perverts, but what can one do? You could also think about what you're into, you know hobbies, and look around there. Like if you're into theater, go see a show, maybe you'll see someone there alone, you could strike up a conversation, and hey you never know. Love usually finds us in unexpected places. Don't give up though, and if you have no boyfriend for you reunion, well so what? Relationships aren't the only thing, if you're happy with your life, and your confident about yourself, be proud of who you are, don't let anyone make you feel less because you don't have a man in your life. It'll happen when it it's supposed to.
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