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I'm just some girl. I don't really stand out much unless I'm on a stage. I'm not loud unless I get angry. And I don't love unless its proven to me first. I've been hurt almost beyond repair by people I've loved and trusted. But I can only grow from that. I live my life by my own accord. I love my parents more than anything, they have given me an amazing home to grow up in, someplace I want to come back to. I have a boyfriend who has been my best friend for a long time, he's helped me get through a lot. We've been each other's rock when times got hard.I have my dreams and aspirations, and while some may not come true... the most important things is to know I've tried my hardest. I trust my intuition more than I trust any living person. My gut has never failed me, but unfortunately, I have failed it.
Someone once told me that I don't live in the "real world", that I live in a box - fortunately for that person, they never lived my life. My life is real to me, and me alone. I've been through a lot... I've been hurt, I've laughed.. I've seen life, and death... tears of sadness and tears of joy. I've felt every emotion known to man. Hatred, Love, Sadness, Joy, Ultimate Bliss, Anger.. So don't judge me until you actually get to know me. There's more to me than just about anyone knows. Even my closest of friends.
I'm the "Dear Abby" of all of my friends.
advice
Hi, I've been best friends with a girl since I was 3 years old and I moved away awile later but we stayed in touch pretty good. Now I am in college and we are talking every day on Messenger. I am 18 and she is 2 months younger than me. This is the first time that I have had extra feelings for her and I think I am falling in love. I'm not sure if she is feeling the same way as I am but she is sending out signals that I can't tell if she's talking to me as a friend or as a potential boyfriend. I would really like something to happen and she is coming down to the same college as I am going to next year. I'm confused on whether I should tell her now how I feel or wait. I also dont know if she would freak out or tell me she only sees me as a friend. I sort of dont want to tell her now because I dont want her to have to worry about a long term relationship or have a crappy senior year because of me. What do you think I would do? Would you freak out if you put yourself in her shoes and I told you? Sorry its so long but thank you.
Confused
Hey Confused.
I think that you're in a tough situation, but not altogether impossible to solve. You say you have been friends for a very long time, so maybe she is feelings something for you also. Time can only tell. I think that you should wait a bit to tell her how you feel. You can lay subtle hints to her, however, don't come right out and tell her yet. She may be falling for you, but at the moment she could be confused about things - in the same way that you are. It may scare her to know that you feel strongly for her, because you have been friends for so long. Turning friendship into a relationship is hard because (as I know personally) at times you start to fear that you won't have that friendship if things don't work out. With all the stressed of senior year also, she may need a friend by her side for it. Let time run its course and watch for more signals of how she feels. Once you are almost positive that she feels for you what you do for her, then tell her.
I hope somehow I helped you. Keep in touch and let me know how things go, ok? Feel free to drop me a message if you have any more questions.
Hi SammyPie!
First of all I would like to say that the advise you give people seems really helpful. You definitely have talent. I have a few problems in my life at the moment that I would like to confide with you. However, I would not like other people to find out about it. I am a very "private" person. Is there any way that I could give you my e-mail address and we could talk that way?
p.s- my e-mail address is princessana2789@aol.com
p.p.s- i'm not as petty as i sound...lol
all sent
im the girl that asked the ? about her boyfriend being clingy, and weather or not i should break up with him. i read your advice, and it was so helpful! it was great to see that i wasnt the only one in that situation, and that someone could help me! thank you so much! i just wanted to let you kno, that i broke up with him today, and he took it pretty well. im so happy i did, and that we can still be friends! thanks so much again! im so glad i decided to ask for advice!
I'm so glad that my advice worked for you! I'm smiling over here. I love to help people. Whenever you need ANYTHING, feel free to ask me, ok? I'm always here to listen or to advise. I may not always have any answers, but I always try to do my best. Always remember, though, don't just think with your heart or your brain alone, let them both agree. Once they do, your decision will be the right one.
this kid ik whos a yr younger than me and lives in my bfs neighborhood told me that this grl my bf went out with a few times before was talkin about me to him (to my friend..not my bf) and said that she hated me or something. iv never met her..iv met a few of my bfs friends and im confsued becuz i talked to this girl that was one of his friends on the phone one time and i guess it was her but i thot it was someone else and this prob sounds weird and everything but i just feel confused cuz 1. i didnt say anything 2. i feel like he could still like her or she likes him or something and i guess i get too jealous but i still dunno my friend couldve been wrong and this sint even a prob i just keep reminding myself about it
Hmm... Ok, I got a little confused by what you wrote, but I will try to take a stab and give you advice from what I understood. I have this firm belief that most girls are REALLY petty. I've come to this conclusion because I've witnessed girls fighting over guys, and stopping friendships because one girl goes out with the other girls crush... And they throw around the word hate so easily. It seems alot easier for girls to go behind each others backs and talk trash about everyone, and I've witnessed that too. This is what seems to be the case with your situation. Unfortunately, this girl will probably always remain inconsiderate to you, so I suggest that you just ignore what is going on. She isn't worth your time. Her words may make you angry since she doesn't know you, but ignoring them is better than causing the situation to be larger than it needs to be.
Hang in there. Don't stoop down to her level. And remember, jealousy is a normal emotion, and it will attack at any time, so don't fight it. lol. I hope I helped in some way. Feel free to drop me a message if you need to.
when i made out with my bestfriend and my boyfriends cousin ....i asked him the today why he did it and he said "i dont know" and it was after school but like everyone was around and we were leavin so we werent around any of our friends sooo does that mean he wont give me the real answer til were alone again or am i supposed to believe that he dosent kno why he was holdin my hands and cuddling and kissin me?
please help im really confused!!
I personally think that this guy probably doesn't want anyone to know what happened. For some reason this situation aggrivated me, because it hits a little close to home. I think that if he truly cares or something, then he'd do it all in public, or feel comfortable enough to let you know how he feels in front of other people. There is a slight possibility that he isn't fully sure how he feels about you, however, I think you need to ask him more direct questions, such as; What do you feel for me? and What made you kiss me? and Was it just a hook-up or could it turn into more?
This is all stuff you should think about also. What does this stuff mean to you?
I hope I helped in some way. Hang in there and good luck. If you have any other questions, please feel free to ask them.
i have a problem with 2 guys. me and my boyfriend broke up in july, and we we're fighting for weeks. he gotta new gf and that crushed me...keep in mind i had just come home from my cousins funeral in pensyilavnia (i live in illinois) and he had his best friend brake us up. suddenly, he asks if i can call him so he can talk to me about sum stuff, so i did. he tells me how much he misses me and how he broke up with his gf and the only reason he went out with her was because he though it would make him forget about me. i feel kinda bad for him, and he asked if i wanted to go to his house saturday... the thing is, i took his virginity and he took mine. i'm worried if i go over there that we'll have sex and he'll ask me back out. there's a twist to it. i met a guy at school the 1st day, and i really like him and he likes me... the thing is i think we're both kinda too shy to ask one another out and i dunno wut to do!!!! who should i go with?
Well, here's my outlook. I truly believe that things happen for a reason. Your boyfriend and you broke up for a reason. I don't think he is mature enough to handle a relationship if he has his friends break up with you for him and if he feels he needs to rebound to another girl in order to get over a relationships. I am a firm believer in fate, and you met this new guy at your school for a reason. If you feel a connection with him, start up a conversation, make eye contact, and get to know him for who he is. You don't have to jump into a relationship with him right away, find out if he is someone you "click with." Postpone seeing your ex-boyfriend for a while, so you can get yourself together. You are not in the right frame of mind to be seeing him, and the first sign that you shouldn't go see him on Saturday is because you are scared you will have sex with him. If you feel that vulnerable to him right now AND you're scared... then don't. Tell him that you will hang out some other time, this way you can give yourself a breather and you can get to know the new guy.
Hang in there. I hope I helped. Feel free to leave me a question/message any time you need to. I'm always here for advice if anyone needs it.
hey, as u prolly know, im not asking a question, im here to complement you on your reply to the girl who hasnt got her first kiss bc shes too afraid. I just wanted to say your a great advicer and i rly admire your "work". Good luck with that college application thing.
much love
drew
P*s, take a look at myne plz, its HckyAg89
Wow. That really caught me off-guard. I really appreciate you taking time out to write this to me. Thank you very much. Your comment really made my night a little brighter. I would love to check your advice column. Keep in touch, Drew.
Love
Samantha
ps. I added you to my favorite columnists.
Hi ok im 14 and well ive never been kissed.. i mean i could have been kissed a couple of times but i kinda said i didnt want to but i wanted to so bad its just i dont know how!! i mean what if u bite the other persons tongue or what if they bite you!? and then what if the other person has braces and u get scratched or sumthing else??? like idk i just keep on getting this ideas in my head and get paranoid!! i dont think ill ever kiss anyone unless its just like a peck.. please HELP!!!!!!!
p.s can u give me tips and how to french kiss??
I didn't get my first kiss until I was 15. I was a person who believed that my first kiss should mean something and it shouldn't be remembered because of a truth or dare game, or spin the bottle. You're first kiss should be special. I give you a lot of credit for not just kissing someone to get it over with. I thought I wasn't ever going to kiss someone. But trust me, the wait is worth it. I had NO IDEA what I was doing when he kissed me. But it all just came naturally. You don't have to get certain techniques or anything, because it just happens. Sometimes weird things happen, like little bites or something, but you don't have to worry about it. It happens to the best of us.
I hope I helped! Good luck! I hope your first kiss is as memorable as mine was. =)
Hey. I need some advice and you seem like you like helping people out so here i go:
I'm a sophomore and ever since last year, I have liked this guy in my high school and he has liked me back. However, this guy is a player. He goes out with many girls at the same time. He gets over all of them, yet he's never been able to get over me. He always asks me out and I always refuse him. Who would want to go out with a player and get hurt? He promises me that he'll change. Sadly, I caught him making out with another girl the day after. I was devastated. I sent him a letter that told him how I felt. In it I told him how stupid I felt for liking and caring so much about him for such a long time. I also told him I was sick of lies and false promises. I ended it by saying "don't write back or talk to me anymore...leave me alone, you've hurt me enough." That day I came home and started crying. I should feel better now that it's over, but I don't. The thought that he'll never talk to me again makes me sad. Even though he's broken my heart and played me from the very start, I can't help but keep liking him. Should I talk to him again? Should I keep trying to make "us" work out? Please let me know your honest answer.
I honestly think that you did the right thing by writing him a letter and telling him how he truly made you feel. Emotions are such weird things. We are normally drawn to the people who would hurt us the most, and that is what is odd. Its like a learning process. Unfortunately for you, you have liked this guy for an very long time. I was in that boat too, once and I was hurt pretty badly by it. It was a different situation, however, I know what you are going through. Its hard to like someone a lot, but have to tell them that it just won't work out. I do not think that you and he should be together, because you deserve someone who will treat you right. Besides, being with someone who has been with an unknown number of females could be dangerous. You don't need to worry about if what he has done in the past will carry on to you (aka STDs or something like that) and you also don't need to sit at home worrying if he will actually change or if he is going behind your back and getting together with another girl. People like him very rarely turn over a new leaf. I think you can do better than him. Getting over your feelings for him may be hard, but it may be worth it. Until you see him changing, don't go for it. Why risk the hurt?
I hope I helped. Good luck.
By the way, I love giving advice. And I am willing to give it to anyone about anything. Feel free to ask anything else if you need to. Hang in there. Let me know how things go... ~SammyPie
Thanks so much! i will follow the advice and update you on how things are going! :)
ONce again! THANKS!
not a problem. =) anytime
OK, I met this guy at the mall and we got to know eachother. He calls me almost everyday and we flirt ALL the time. The thing is, he already has a girlfriend. I think he likes me and all but i don't want him to break up with her for me but i REALLY like him. What should i do?!?! PLease help me!!!
Ok, since he does have a girlfriend, I think that you should respect that territory, and make some space between you and him. I understand you flirt on the phone a lot, but maybe you shouldn't talk on the phone so much. His girlfriend probably has no idea who you are, or even that her boyfriend is talking to another girl. Tell him about this, and if he pushes anything or says not to worry about it. Go from there. I don't mean to sound harsh or anything, its just that these situations can get worse before the get better, if they even do. You don't want to get yourself caught up in something that could cause you a lot of problems later. You may like him a lot, but try to distance yourself from him. This will be healthier for you, and you can maybe get yourself to know other people.
I hope I helped. I apologize again if I offended you, though. Hang in there. If you have any more questions or something, please feel free to ask.
how do i get a girl friend
Be yourself and be confident. Don't put on a fake personality to impress someone! Go right up to the girls you are interested in and say hello. Thats always a good way to build up a friendship first, and then you can work on turning it into a relationship! Good luck! I hope I helped! If you need ANYTHING else, feel free to ask. =)
I'm 14/f, and my best guy friend is really awesome, so awesome infact that I actually like him as more than a friend. The problem is, I liked him before too and I told him then and he (atleast then) liked someone else. I really like him, but I don't want to ruin our friendship!
Oooo, I've been in this situation too! It is such a difficult position to be in. But I ended up telling my guy friend that I liked him, nothing came out of it, but it just felt good to be open about it. If you feel comfortable enough to tell your friend, then I say go for it. Who knows? Maybe he could like you back. =) Good luck, hun. Whatever you do, keep you and his friendship strong. Friendship should always be first, and relationship should come second. I hope I helped. If you have any more questions, feel free to leave them for me!!! MWAH
I've been going out with my boyfriend for a couple months and I very much enjoy kissing him. The problem is, he always makes the first move. Out of all of my boyfriends, I've never made any first moves or anything. I want to just try something new and make my boyfriend realize I'm spontaneous, sexy and not shy. Any kissing techniques I could use on him? I really don't want to come off like I'm trying too hard, but I need help to get over this shy thing I have with my own boyfriend!
When you two hang out or you are out on a date... just randomly and when its least expected, grab him by the shoulders and kiss him. Guys LOVE a spontaneous girl. Or just randomly start running your fingernails on his neck or something. Anything random you do will make your boyfriend realize how sexy and spontaneous you are. Go for it, hunni!
I hope I helped. Good luck! If you have any more questions, feel free to leave them for me.
if you like a girl and she is goin out with someone what should i do
I think you should wait out THEIR relationship... and build up a friendship with her. But don't come on strong. Just make her know you are there as a friend for her. And then maybe eventually, one day you can pursue something (when she DOESN'T have a boyfriend)... hehe... because it would be wrong to pressure her into something..
I hope I helped! GOOD LUCK!!!!
my boyfriend and i have been together for almost 2 years now.. this year im going to be a senior in high school, and he's going into his sophomore year of college. he plays basketball, so sometimes during the season it is hard for us to be together. we made it through last year, but i just feel like im not really up to make it through this year. he lives like 20 minutes away down in the dorms. i really love him and dont want to break up, but what else can i do? i need attention haha... i feel selfish, but no.. im really just used to having him around whenever i need him. any tips, thoughts, suggestions?
I think that if you two care about each other as much as I believe you do, then I think that you should try your hardest to stay together. Set aside at least 1 day each week where you can just go out to the movies or go out to eat, or just spend the day together (or night.) Make sure that you try to go to his basketball games, that way you can be in the stands cheering him on. This will also help build up your relationship because he will know you care about what he does. You aren't being selfish. You have your own personal needs, everyone does. Things like this take adjusting, and you just need to have faith in your relationship and patience that things will turn out right in time.
Good luck, hun. If you have anymore questions, please feel free to leave them for me. I hope I helped.
Heyeveryone, i really need some help!! ok, well, i did something stupid about a month ago..i talked to some guy online and gave him my picture..and i have a boyfriend that i really love. I guess why i talked to that guy was because he asked me about my boyfriend. And my boyfriend is moving to oregon and so i kinda opened up and talked to that guy about my b/f. now, my b/f found that convo and was really scared about our relationship. He said he trusted me 100% but now, he says only like 50%. Im so0o upset i've told him i'll never do that again..but he dont believe me..he's in oregon and we are doing long dist. How can i make him trust me more?! I really love him with all my heart and I want to make it work out. Any advice on my situation?! PLEASE HELP!!! ~manda~
My angel is away and we're on an open- long distance relationship right now. Which means, we are allowed to date other people but we are still emotionally together. There are temptations everywhere, take this from someone who knows, however, you can channel yourself to focus on other things. You make love your boyfriend (as I do love mine,) but remember, if you have feelings for someone else too, be honest to yourself and take the time to figure out everything in your head. If you want your boyfriend to trust you, explain to him the motives behind the conversation you had with the guy that you met online. Tell him how you TRULY feel. Sometimes the truth hurts, and other times it helps.. whichever the direction, be honest.
I hope I helped. Hang in there. If you have any other questions, please feel free to leave me a message and I will help you as best I can.
Another word of advice: Sometimes a stranger is an easier person to talk to, however, make sure you aren't giving away TOO much information that he can hurt you with later on.
ok so last year i went out with this kid Ben right but he cheated on me now hes having a baby with the girl he cheated on me with. He called me about a month ago and told me he missed me and i told him my feelings i still had for him so i've been talking to him ever since and i kissed him a couple of times. and i dont know what to do cuz hes still with the pregnant girl and i know i shouldent even be talking to him but i need an outsider opinion.
P.S i ve also been seeing this other guy whose 22 im 16
I believe that he has a responsibility to the girl he got pregnant, and especially since she is still carrying his child, I don't think you should be pursuing(spelling???) anything with him. He hurt you in the past, and anyone who cheats on their significant other, in the way this Ben guy did, should not have a second chance at being with you. Its not fair to you, and its not fair to the woman who is carrying his child. You will inevitably get hurt if you end up going back to him, and potentially YOU could get pregnant in the long run, too. There are so many things to think about in a situation like this, and that is what sucks so much. You have feelings for someone who you know isn't right for you. I might sound cliche, but there are so many other guys out there who will treat you so much better AND they haven't gotten other people pregnant. Keep that in your mind and stay strong. My suggestion is to move on. Any baggage that he carries (aka his child) would be placed upon your shoulders too if you ended up back with him also.
Hang in there, hun. If you need anymore advice, please feel free to leave me a question in my site, ok? I hope this helped.
Okay, the thing is, I'm confused. I know this is going to sound stupid, but I need to ask. People are always asking about tips on kissing and making out. I've never done either of those things, but what gets me muddled is the whole 'it comes naturally' thing. I mean, is it really based on instinct, or should i be worried about my first time doing all those things? (I'm having a hard time getting my point across here, work with me). People ask things like 'where should i put my hands' and 'what kind of kiss' and 'how do you french'. Are those things that you really need advice about, or do they really all come naturally and people only fret because they haven't done them? Is it better to have people tell you how-to's so it'll go better, or is it all going to come together anyway? I hope you don't find me too silly for asking, I'm just(like I stated before) confused! Thank you to all who choose to answer
Oh boy, I remember being scared about kissing. But I never asked anyone else for advice for it, because I wanted my kisses to be personal. Well, the wait was worth it. The confusion died down. Everything just came so naturally. Your hands automatically go to wherever is right for the moment. Your eyes close. And if its the right person, you travel with the kiss. A kiss is something that does not require advice. Because advice gets thrown out a window in the moment. You don't think when you kiss someone, so its pointless to ask for advice.
I hope I helped.
What is a good line right before u kiss someone. bc im not a brave enough person jsut ot do it i need a line.
If you need a line, I have to say... You shouldn't be kissing anyone. Just go right out and kiss someone. Spontaneous works so much more than a line. Lines are incredible turn offs... Sorry...
I hope I helped in some weird way..