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Im 17 years old, I haven't been on here in atleast 4 or 5 years and I decided to make a new account and start fresh! Ok, so here is my problem. I dated this guy, Mike, for 3 1/2 years about 2 years ago. I was younger and he was 4 years older then me, but thats beyond the point. He was my first love, and I was his first love. Things were kind of shaky in the relationship, but we were both really immature and new to the whole "love" thing. We broke up a few times a week, but it was almost to the point where we were expecting it. Eventually we broke up for good but it was almost impossible to stay away from each other. We'd talk about getting back together all the time but it would never fall through because we knew we needed to end it and just live our young lives apart for awhile. Eventually we stopped talking as often and I started dating this guy like 6 months after we broke up for good. He would still text me occasionally and ask me how I was doing, and to let me know that if I needed anything he'd be there for me. Although I dated this other guy, Keith, for a year and a half, the love I had for him was NOTHING compared to the love I had for Mike. Around 6 months ago me and Keith broke up and I haven't talked to him since, which doesn't bother me one bit. But since Keith and I have been broken up, Mike and I have been hanging out occasionally and talking on a more regular basis, but he has a girlfriend that he's currently living with but claims he can't stand her and wants to break up but is scared how things will work out between me and him and if they ended up shitty he'd lose his current girlfriend as well. I do feel bad that he plays his current girlfriend, but its a first love type of thing, I cant get enough of him. I do want to be with him again, but he has awhole other life with another girl. He invited me to the beach for the weekend with him, and said we could talk about getting back together when we go, but why would he invite me to go with him and not his current girlfriend. I hate being a second choice to him, but I dont want to be like "break up with her and get back with me" since I'd forcing a relationship that may end up not working in the end and I have no right to be telling him what to do. I really want to be with him again, because of course I still love him, but I dont know how to react to everything. Thanks everyone, I know this was long.. (link)
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I totally get how you feel. There is this guy that I am crazy about. I've had a thing for him for about 3 years. We've been on and off for 2 years. I've have boyfriends in between but I couldn't even compare them to the first guy.
Anyways, like you said before, you don't want to be that "other girl" or the "second choice".
So don't talk to him about getting back together, don't hook up with him when he's still with his girlfriend.
If he was so unhappy with his girlfriend, then he should break up with her and not keep playing her. You deserve better too, you don't deserve a guy to talk to you while he's with another girl.
When they break up, that's when you should start talking to him about getting back together.
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okay. so me and my best friend are both bi. The last time we had a sleepover we ended up making out and feeling eachother up, I loved it, but the thing is is that that night she said, okay, never again. but then the next morning we were making out even more. I just want to know is what can I do/sat to get her to want to do it again. ps I DO NOT JUst like her for her body, i like her 1. because shes nice and funny and 2. shes one of the only lesbians I know.
we are both 14 but VERY mature for our age. Please answer soon as our sleepover will be in 1 or 2 days. Thank you for taking your time and reading this. other info if it helps- we are both white, petite, GIRLS :), im bi I think shes either bi or lesbian because she has a boyfriend. (link)
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Just talk to her about it. She might not have been completely comfortable with it, even if she did it again.
Like maybe she isn't sure what she wants. Plus she has a boyfriend so keep that in mind.
She did say, "Okay, never again".
I've been in a situation like this with a guy. I loved kissing him and making out but I was never totally comfortable with it because he wanted more than I could give him. So I'd be like, "I can't do this anymore." But it happened again and again..
So the best thing to do is to talk to her and figure out what is going on.
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My boyfriend and I have been dating for almost two years now. We are happy together and it has been a great relationship. There is only one problem. My bestfriend that I have been bestfriends with for years dosen't act very supportive of our relationship. She likes my boyfriend and we have all hung out together before but whenever I have exciting news she just says "oh cool" without any real response. It makes me upset because we are also friends with this other girl lauren. Lauren and her boyfriend have been dating for about a year now and my bestfriend always talks about how cute they are, saying how he is the best boyfriend ever, liking their pictures on facebook together, when lauren and her boyfriend fight all the time. Call me jealous, but I just don't understand my bestfriend is acting this way and not being supportive of my boyfriend and I. Maybe it's because she has been single for 2 years now? I'm not really sure what to do about this situation. I don't want to tell her all this because I feel that it's childish. I'm just not sure what to do. I want the love and support for my bestfriend with the guy that I love and someday might marry. (link)
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She could be jealous. Honestly, if you really want her support then just talk to her. Don't turn it into a huge deal and make sure it doesn't turn into a fight. Just talk to her calmly and see why she acts the way she does. If she blows it off then there isn't really much you can do. Just enjoy your relationship and maybe she'll come around.
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Hi... there are 2 mean girls named Olivia and Rachel in my school. And i have a group of 3 friends, (me, Alyssa, Ally, and Hayley). My mom said that she will request something: Either if Olivia and Rachel NOT be in my class and having the chance that no friends of mine will be in my class, or having one of my best friends (preferably Alyssa) to be in my class with the chance of Olivia and Rachel in my class. I dont know which to ask for. Please help!!! (link)
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Well either way I'm sure you can handle it.
If you choose to have one of your best friends in your class then you'll have her when things get tough. But if you choose not to have those two girls in your class then you can stay away from them and make new friends.
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Is is cheating if you watch porn only because you want to educate yourself (not trying to cheat)& when u watched it you were thinking if that was me giving my bf what he needs & wants for example how to give a blo job? I'm in my late teens and don't have a clue. I've read articles with mixed reviews which left me quite confused is it cheating or not?? Also if i wanted to cheat i would have gone out and psychically cheated. (link)
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In my opinion, it's not cheating. But I also hate porn and everything about it.
If your boyfriend is accusing you of cheating, then maybe it's just how he sees it. If he's uncomfortable with the idea of it, then you shouldn't watch it.
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we are both in our 40's. we are both married to other people but have this strong attraction to each other. Am I playing with fire? All we did so far was hug each other but express feelings towards one another. Please advise. (link)
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Okay if there is an attraction between you guys, it wouldn't be the right thing to do.
It's not that it's wrong to hug, but it just gets your thoughts going.
You're married and you wouldn't want your spouse to be hugging someone else thinking the same thing about them.
I'd keep my distance if I were you.
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Well, I have a previous post about this same issue wondering if he was, It turned out he was cheating ;( He said that he only did it cause I argued with him everytime I saw him in the past few months...this is very true. I did do that A LOT. But most of our arguments stemmed from him not introducing me to his friends--I felt, even though he spent money on me and took me on dates, that he excluded me from his life--that I didn't feel like a part of it...that's where most of my upset stemmed from. I'm not perfect. There were times when I acted a little bipolar and wouldn't just get upset too often. But he said the cheating is "my fault" now I feel like it is:( I feel like if I didn't push him so much he wouldn't have done it....he said "when we fight it feels like I'm not with you." He said one girl, the one he cheated on me with, was a friend and the other was a girl at a bar he got when we broke up but I was always the girlfriend--he said he felt nothing for them and that he just mindlessly did it. That was his explanation for cheating.....I told him I never cheated on him....I even showed him texts of a guy I kissed when we were broken up who I said "You know I got back together with my bf right?" to prove how dedicated I was to him--that I was telling other guys to back off--that I love my bf. He just focused on the part that I kissed the guy when we were broken up...even tho he had sex once when we were broken up and supposedly had sex once recently with other girls during our relationship......I just feel like a fool...I pushed him away arguing so much....I just was so adamant about not playing games they tell you to in dating books like ignoring the phone and being distant if he upset, and instead I would always complain and tell him about problems--hoping that being authentic would work someday with some guy--even tho it hasn't yet, and once again, it got me nowhere. He said I didn't need to pester him--he would have immersed me in his personal life eventually and that he had to do it when he was ready--that because I was his first relationship in three years--he was just slower to incorporate me into friends and family, and that's why I didn't meet them, but I was going to eventually. He dumped me today, after I found out last night....the fool I am was going to stay with him because I thought if the cheating were for fights we could get along and prevent it...but if the cheating was purely physical reasons (which it wasn't) there would be nothing I could do. That was my rational. He said he thinks I am his soulmate and dreams of us marrying and living together, but at this time we can't be together and he needs to "explore other options" because he's drained....he says after our break up, anyone else it would be all physical and he loves me:(:(:( I feel just awful....I feel very much that I had a hand in this undoing....and I feel guilt and extreme sadness.......I don't want to date. I don't want anything physical with anyone else.....I just want to work, do my hobbies, and I hope eventually he'll come around. I feel like we can fix this--if the cheating was just due to emotional distance--and not a need for variety...I can fix it. Am I wrong for thinking that? Am I foolish? Stupid? What is wrong with me? Should I even bother hoping we'd be back again once more? Now I feel like, now that being honest about how i feel, and not playing games, and being a nice girlfriend who cooks and cleans and just wants a guy to introduce her to friends after maybe four months and expresses that never works...because I have showed the same behavior with all past bfs and they always in some way take advantage and run away.....or lose interest....even when they swear up and down that they love my honest and authenticity and my refusal to ignore, be distant, and play games.....I just feel like I need to be fake and play games if I am ever to find someone who loves me more than I love them for once... because it's always me loving more...me getting hurt.... (link)
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Okay well there is no excuse for cheating. It's just plain wrong and worse than arguing. If he was so upset with the arguing, then he should have broke up with you before he went with some other girl.
You were faithful to him, you don't deserve a guy who won't do the same for you.
What you need to work on is the arguing. Couples shouldn't argue. Even though it happens a lot, it's pretty much pointless and tears down the relationship. If you talk out the problems, that's different. Give them space and then talk to them when you're cooled down.
One thing is that he said that he think your his soulmate and dreams of marrying you but then wants to explore other options. You don't want a guy to treat you like an option. If he really loved you in that way, you would not be an option.
Playing games just sucks and hurts people because feelings aren't real. When you find someone, be real. You'll eventually find a guy who will love you just as much as you love him.
I always played games with guys and I never truly loved them. I just liked the attention. Now everything is better and I'm happy and in love.
Be real and don't argue.
Forget about this guy. Cut him from your life. You might care for him a lot and love him but no one deserves this.
Work on yourself and find someone better.
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I was very active and very in shape up until three years ago. I started eating junk food and constantly drinking soda. It has gotten to the point where I will actually go up town more than once a day to buy soda and chips. My stomach has become quite round and my rear end gotten huge as have my thighs. I was wondering what I could do to stop drinking soda and eating junk food. I don't need any help with exercise, I just need to know how to stop the constant snacking. Thanks in advance! (link)
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I did that all the time a couple years ago. I lost so much weight since then. I weigh like 20 lbs less than than I did before.
Like every one else said, snack healthier.
You just need to make it into a habit. Which will probably take about a month if you keep up with it every day.
The only time I have a problem with snacking is when I'm watching tv. Although, I wouldn't really call it a problem because I hardly watch tv. But when I do, I always eat.
So number one, find healthier snacks. Number 2, find things to do so you're not bored enough to snack.
Good luck!
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So, I start highschool this year. And I'm nervous.
I am kind of shy right now, and I really want to meet the -RIGHT- Guy..
And tips?
I want to become one of those obnoxious girls that get along with anyone. But I'm scared of looking/feeling dumb.
And suggestions on what I should do?
Or any freshman stories to share?
Just need to calm the nerves.. (link)
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I was really nervous when I started high school too. Lots of friendships drift away and you end up making new friend.
If you want to get along with anyone then just be friendly. You said you're scared of looking and feeling dumb but those people who are outgoing and easy to get along with don't care what people think. So that's what you have to do. Just learn to be confident with yourself and not care what people think.
There are going to be people who judge you and make fun of you and all that for being friendly but those people don't matter. So ignore all that and be happy and make friend.
Join clubs, activities, and sports. That's one of the easiest ways to make friends because you all have something in common.
On meeting the right guy, he'll come to you. Most girls go out looking for the right guy but never really find him.
Just set standards for yourself and things you would like in a guy. Then eventually you will find him. Focus more on school though, you have the rest of your life to find a guy.
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There are 2 guys....let's call them J and K.
J is my bf of almost 5 months. He sees a future with me, kids, a house. He is a nice guy. Very sweet. But makes big mistakes in our relationship...like hanging out with girls, texting them, stuff like that. He says he loves me with allhis heart. But I honestly don't know.....J and K both hate eachother with a burning passion btw. Enough that J told meto stop talking to him. I've known J for 6 years. He seriously liked me ever since this year. Saying he wanted a future and stuff. Even though we've dated before and it hasent worked out. He never liked me like this when we dated last year.
K is my best guy friend. We tell eachother anything and everything. I've known him for 3 years. He liked me ever since me and him met. He's very sweet and caring of me. He says all the tim if someone hurts me, he will hurt them. Its so sweet. He says sweeter thinkg than J, and he's also nicer to me. But the catch is....K isn't a very good kid.....he does drugs, goes to juvy alot, and a bunch of other stuff. He said he was willing to stop for me. I asked J and K what they would do if I had to move away....their responses were
J-"be very sad and miss you a lot"
K-"run away with you, I wouldn't be able to stand not talking to you for the rest of my life"
Yeah, K also says that he will never leave me if we dated. He sayd that he would treat me right....like how a woman is sopposto be treated. J used to be a major manwhore....he used girls all the time. He sayd I'm different though. K said all J wants is sex and fighting....but idk......I'm just so confused right now....ive been told by tons of people that J and I are cute, but I've also been told Tht k and I would be cute......what should I do?!:'c (link)
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Well you're in a tough situation. If you can't really trust your boyfriend with girls then you're never going to be happy. If he's still texting girls and all that, it needs to stop or you shouldn't be with him because it's just going to make you very unhappy.
Now with your best friend, he sounds like a really good guy except for all the drugs and going to juvy.
It doesn't matter what their responses were to you moving away. Saying something is one thing, doing is another.
Your boyfriend says you're different now and your best friend says he would treat you right.
See, all of this is just talk. You have no idea how it'd be with your friend and you're not happy with your boyfriend.
I think you shouldn't be with your boyfriend right now. You're too confused and you don't know what you want.
I don't think you should get with your best friend right away. He said he would stop doing all that dumb stuff for you so wait and see if he does.
Good luck!
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right mt friend is always pushing me out of the group of friends she think shes all it but she isent i think im getting into the wrong crowed deffo with her in the group what shall i do guys??? (link)
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Well your friend doesn't sound like a very good friend. If you think your in the wrong crowd then go find people that would love to have you around. Don't stick with people who don't want you there.
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im 9 years and want to know how to get him to touch my boobs im 100% sure i want to please tell me im in love pluse my boobs are big and sexy!!!!!so please help (link)
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Well, you are wayyy too young to have a guy touch you like that. You will end up regretting it for the rest of your life.
Try talking to your parents. They're the ones who you need to talk to at this age.
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Okay so my boyfriend and I have been together for a month and a half and we've already gotten to second base. I am completely comfortable with how far we have gone, but what I wanted to know if we are moving too fast physically. I’m 16 and he’s 17, he doesn’t push me about any of it, it’s all on my terms. So are we moving to fast? (link)
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I've known people who have moved much faster. I don't think you are moving way too fast and it's not all bad since he's not pushing you, plus you're comfortable with it.
Although most relationships that move fast in the beginning don't last very long. It is possible that it could last long though so it's not like that will kill the relationship.
Just remember if you ever get uncomfortable with any of it, just ask him to stop. Just because you move fast and have already went to second base doesn't mean you have to keep going. Good luck!
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hi so i'm a girl, almost 13 going into 7th grade.
i had a dream about this guy,he's going into 8th grade. he's my really good friend. then i realized i liked him all along and thats part of the reason i broke up with my bf (over the summer).
i like him because he is so sweet and always gives me cute things and always pays attention to me. i dont know if he knows broke up with my ex-bf (its summer) but when we go back to school i really want to tell him or make a move (fast b/c other girls like him but dont know him well) but i dont want to ruin our friendship! how can i tell him i like him or make a move without ruining our friendship?? (link)
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Well since he's all sweet with you, it's possible he might feel the same way.
When you go back to school try hinting around with it for a little bit. Flirt a little and see how he reacts. If it's a good reaction then you can tell him how you feel. If the feelings are mutual, great! If not, then make sure you don't lose him as a friend. Don't let it get awkward and just act how you normally would around him.
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I've. Been texting with a guy that I saw once. I got his number I've sent hime pictures and say I look good,but at times he's like no I don't want nothing,but then when I text him back or send a picture he will start texting with me again. What does he really mean? (link)
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I think he doesn't want anything serious. It just seems like he's into you for the way you look. In my opinion, you might just have a small crush on him. You don't really know him or know a whole lot about him.
If he sometimes says that he wants nothing then that's probably how he feels but since you're a pretty girl, he just keeps talking you know?
So I wouldn't get too caught up with him if I were you.
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Okay, I'm 13/f and I have a Best Friend, 12/M and he's my only Best Friend. I know some of you guys might expect I need a girl friend, but I don't. I really don't like having girl friends because it causes drama, and fights and I can't stress myself over that. Anyways, I kind of have this thing where every girl says, "OMG, you're so popular, pretty, you have it all, every guy likes you, and you're so perfect." I know I'm not those things. I don't like hearing those. I mean, sure guys like me even older ones and they all hit on me. I don't appreciate it when they do that especially if they have a girlfriend of their own!! I mean it's very flattering they like me, but I don't know what is it I'm doing to make them hit on me. So, I talked to my Best Friend, and he's dating also, and he hit on me last night. I felt terrible. I don't know what to do. I feel like they are all just using me so they can get something out of me. I know they can't and they never will. A lot of them, have asked me out and I've turned them down. I never really dated, kissed anyone, I never gone beyond the point of hugging. What do you guys think? I love my Best Friend he's like my brother to me. It only seems like they hit on me while they're dating then, the guys dump their girl(s) then ask me out! That's really stupid. I don't know what to do. Please help. (link)
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Boys are just immature. They see something pretty and they're like, "ohhh shiny"
But seriously, if your best friend keeps doing this then talk to him about it.
It is extremely rude and horrible if they hit on you when they have a girlfriend. Those are the types of guys you want to stay away from.
You already know what they want from you and you already said they'll never get anything out of you so that's really good.
Just ignore guys like that and just talk to your best friend.
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These days i feel my boyfriend is avoiding me. Once i got a call from him and by accident i pressed the off button of the mobile,it was his call. After that he has changed,he doesnt call me,write me. I feel so sad. I actually told him about the accident. But he seems doesnt care anymore. I dont know what to do. (link)
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To be honest, if he's actually upset about something like that, he seems really immature.
You can try talking to him and let him know that you still care about him but you need to know why he's avoiding you. Just don't get angry or upset at him. Just ask him calmly.
Maybe do something nice for him and see how he reacts? If he has a bad reaction then you probably deserve better.
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Hi, I'm 19/f
my whole life, I have been to maybe 5 different churches, and for some reason, I just feel as if church isn't for me. I find it very boring.
I believe in God to the fullest, but sometimes I have my questions, and of course, everyone's answers are going to be different depending on their beliefs.
But within the 5 churches I have been too, I have got many different answers regarding the following question:
DO YOU HAVE TO BE BAPTISED TO GO TO HEAVEN?
I have heard, Yes, you do; and I have heard no you don't, as long as you believe you have a right into God's Kingdom.
Personally, I believe that IF God is as mightly and loving as others make him out to be, than shouldn't he know who believes in him, and who doesn't? Why does baptism give you the pass to Heaven? Why can't believing just be enough??
I have never been baptised, but I have been saved. I pray to God; not just when I want something, but to let him know that I appreciate the things he has given me, and letting me live another day.
Everyone tells me to 'read the bible' but personally, I don't want too. How did God write the bible when he didn't have anything to use? Idk where it came from, who really wrote it, or even if it is true.
Is it wrong for me to have all these questions and these doubts? Does that make me a non believer?
My father told me to talk to a priest, but honestly, I won't get a solid answer, and I feel as if I'll be wasting my time. No one knows the REAL truth about any of it.
Sometimes I question if there is a Heaven or a Hell. How do we really know if they are real; has anyone died and came back and said, 'Man, Heaven is amazing; or Hell is hot as fire!"
I feel so guilty questioning this- but I'm just curious.
SOrry for the length. (link)
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Don't feel guilty about questioning it. I've been going to church my whole life and there were times when I questioned everything. A lot of people do.
I don't believe that you have to be baptized to go to heaven. Baptism is actually supposed to be showing that you are saved and accepted Jesus as your savior. Like for example, wedding rings. You get married, the rings are an outward showing that you are married. If you aren't wearing the ring, it doesn't mean you're not married right? So yeah, that's what baptism is like.
I believe that getting saved is what gets you to heaven. I just believe the Bible. Actually, if you do look in the Bible in Romans it talks about being saved to get to heaven.
Romans 3:10-Pretty much we all make mistakes and do wrong. God doesn't like it so we don't get to go to heaven.
Romans 6:23-The price for our sin is death and hell.
Romans 5:8-Jesus already paid for our sin so now we can go to heaven.
Romans 10:13-Then all God asks is that we stop trusting ourselves and trust him to take us to heaven.
So that's why I believe what I believe about heaven and hell.
With the whole Bible thing, God used people to write it. Like I think Peter and Paul. I'm not completely sure. But different people wrote the different books.
I try to read it sometimes but yeah it's hard to enjoy it. If I were you, I'd just read a chapter in proverbs every day. It's more relatable for me since I can get bored easily since I'm still a teenager.
Believing is just faith. That's all it really is.
During the time I was doubting everything, I'd question God and how everything came to be. I would look around and be like, "How in the world could any of this be true?" Then I look around again and then I realized, "How could any of this not be true?" Since then I couldn't look outside and think that things just formed that way and God didn't exist. But that's just me.
Everyone has their own views and opinions on everything.
My advice is to just keep praying and have faith.
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Well my boyfriend is like really shy and is not at all intimate with me in any way .ive read other articles about this and all of them are telling me I should make the first movebut the problem is I'm also very shy so I was wondering is their a way for me to like entice him to make the first move.pleeeaaaassseee help! (link)
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I think you should just hint around it. Start getting more close and touching his hands more. He's going to start thinking about kissing you and eventually he will get the nerve to do it.
If you're too shy to kiss him, then the best thing for you to do is just hint around it. But don't come off too strong because it might push him away or make him feel even more awkward. Good luck!
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Hi, whenever we go out he starts looking at the other women or girls but in home he makes me feel like i'm a princess. he's in his late 40's and single father and i'm in my mid 30's. when we started to date he was so sweet and kissing me all the time and holding hands. we love each other and we live together. so guys, my question is he obviously has a roving eyes that means is he wanting to cheat or is he just wishing that he could have a one night with those women? i mean i have jokingly told him that he has a very roving eyes and he replied, only looking not touching so it doesn't better. what does he mean? thanks. (link)
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I don't think he's planning on cheating of you or even thinking he wants one night with those women. It just means he's noticing other people who are attractive. It would bother me. If he's staring, that's a problem. If he's just glancing, that's fine. It just means that he's a man and he's into women. But if he makes it obvious that he's checking some other women, it's rude.
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