about

I'm Jack/Jamie.

I'm 28 years old. I graduated from Michigan State University with my Bachelor of Science in Chemistry. GO GREEN! Now I'm a high school chemistry teacher in New York City living with my husband in a small studio apartment we pay way too much money for.

I've been on this site for 14 years as of March 23, 2020.
You may have seen me as CuxMiBeckNow7, but I've since shortened my name.


my forum
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Here is my Recommended Columnist of the Decade for the 2020s:
Laura!




--Jack

advice

16/F

What are some little ways or things you can do to be more outgoing and befriend people easilier? I'm starting the 11th grade tomorrow and I want this year to be different. I don't want to be shy anymore. My best friend makes friends so easily...

http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=545090

Good luck! =]

--Jack
(17/m)

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I live in massachusetts and I have such bad problems at my highschool thhat I just cannot go back (dnt tell me to suck it up lol) and I want to go to another school in a different town. I called the next town overs highschool and they won't let me='( ..are they jus saying tat? Ks there ANY way I can get into that school without living in that town?!?!

You might find out about School of Choice, but I'm not sure if that exists in your state, but it sorta kinda does in mine.

Anyway, that might only apply to different schools in a district.

You might not be able to switch to a new school if you don't live within their boundaries. Sorry.

--Jack
(17/m)

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me and my boyfriend play around alot, like sexually . but i can never get wet, like even when we're having sex ,and he takes it out for like a minute, im dry . is there anyway i can change that ? or is there somethings he can do ?

Try lube or a lubricated condom or something. That might help.

--Jack
(17/m)

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Hi, I am an 18year old girl. I was with this guy towards the end of my senior year. We weren’t dating, but we were hooking up. We went to prom together (I know, prom is lame) and continued hooking up/having sex. Then the he told me to go to a party one night, one I was already going to. And at this party he ignored me. I heard he also hooked up with another girl. I went away for the summer and didn’t talk to him for 8 weeks. Now he wants to see me. Even though at first I said no, He somehow pressured me into seeing him - alone. He invited himself over to my house, saying "you never know who you can sleep with in college" and part of me thinks that is right. I want to do it for that reason, but I don't want him thinking he can get me so easily. I don't really think I mind being used, as long as I'm using him to. I think I may be attracted to the asshole in him. Should I tell him straight off and not see him at all? Do we hang out as friends? Do I suck it up and sleep with him?

Stay away form him. He's using you for sex, and you don't deserve that. He's a sleeze.

--Jack
(17/m)

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what are some things to say to my boyfriend to make him happy and let him know i care about him...like what do guys like hearing from girls?

oh and i want to tell him i love him but i don't want to scare him ...he said it to me after 4 months but a few months after that we broke up but then got back together...i want it to be cute, like i don't just wanna randomly come out and say it...how should i do itt? thanks :) we've been together for a year (not counting the 3 months we weren't together)

If you care about him, tell him you care about it.

It's as simple as that. If you try to come up with some complicated way to tell him, you're both going to end up confused and he's probably going to take it the wrong way. Being direct is ALWAYS the best choice.

--Jack
(17/m)

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Hiya..


Well a about a month ago my ex and i broke up. It didn't last long. He found someone else, and i cant find anyone. Well there's this one guy named Chris he likes me but he has a gf and he likes her more than me.He told me if he wasn't dating her he would of asked me out. He's in a long distance relationship and he says it sucks. He calls me practically everyday i don't know what to do. I told him that i would wait for him but i don't think i can. HOW CAN I FIND THE RIGHT GUY!lol im 14 and next week i start back into school. There also is another guy who likes me, he tells my friends and tells them to keep quite about it. He's dating this girl to get his mind off of me. i have no clue what to do anymore and im so tired of it. PLZ help me!

Don't wait for Chris. He's telling you he'd be with you if he wasn't with his girlfriend because he probably wants to keep his options open once his relationship is over. Stay away from him. He's not worth it.

You're 14. You're not going to find the perfect guy right now. Wait for a bit, and you might. But if you keep jumping from guy to guy, you're just going to end up heartbroken. It's ok to not be dating anyone. Plenty people are single and are doing just fine.

--Jack
(17/m)

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About eight weeks ago I had sex with my bf, and the condom slipped off. my period was supposed to be four weeks after it. About a week after it was supposed to come, i took two first response pregnancy tests and they both came out negative. I heard that First Response is one of the most accurate tests. So what are the chances that I could still be pregnant even though the two tests came out negative?

Like Erinn said, there's always a chance it's wrong.

See a doctor just in case.

If you aren't getting your period, you are probably pregnant, or you're stressing about it.

So, just relax.

Next time, be more careful with the condom.

--Jack
(17/m)

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so ive been with my bf for a while n we havent said i love you yet i know he does love me cuz he shows it.. but i want to say it to him well actually i want him to say it first but its taking forever... weve taken eveerything really slow but i just wanna jump the gun this time please help dont worry i know we love each other and im defintely mature to take the step of saying it

I agree with Laura.

If you love him, it should just come from you very naturally, and there shouldn't be doubts about it, or any reservations.

--Jack
(17/m)

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13/F

I have been looking everywhere for cool b-day party themes. Each website I go to, the only themes featured are murder, scavenger hunt, sleepover and things like that. I was thinking of doing a mall scavenger hunt/sleepover but I need more ideas. By the way, my b-day is in January, if that helps. (:

You could do a 20s-themed party.

Everyone dresses up like they're from the 1920s, and you pretend you're actually in the 20s.

You could do research about the 20s to include 20s things and you could ask your parents for ideas for it. Or talk to your grandparents. Chances are they grew up in the 20s or they knew someone who grew up in the 20s.

--Jack
(17/m)

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So my boyfriend and I are pretty serious, he keeps asking me to have sex. It would be both of our first times, but the only reason I keep saying no is because I am so paranoid of getting pregnant at the age of 16. I really want to because my boyfriend is so special to me, so I dont feel like hearing that I am too young, I'm mature. The thing is, my brother and his girlfriend had a highschool pregnancy, and birth control is not an option at all. So I would obviously use a condom, but what i want to know is when are you least likely to get pregnant on your cycle? I heard after you period just finishes, but I would feel better if I knew that I had a lesser risk at a certain time and just do it then. I apologize for it being so long!

No matter when you have sex, on or off your period, just starting or just ending, you can get pregnant.

You may be least likely to get pregnant at a certain time, but in all honesty, ANY time you have sex you can get pregnant, so it won't matter. You can always be the 2% or whatever exception. Just remember that.

--Jack
(17/m)

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IF u keep masterbating will that lower your sperm count?

No, so don't use that as birth control if that's what you were thinking.

--Jack
(17/m)

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By the end of this week I will be in a long distance relationship, thanks to college.
I need some ideas for fun things to do over the phone, or to send each other. I'm hoping if we keep ourselves occupied with games or fun stuff then we won't keep thinking about how we can't be with each other.

Any ideas?

Send each other letters back and forth. It's kind of a lost art, I would say. Letters, since they are somewhat obsolete, are so much more meaningful.

A text message today is the equivalent of a letter pre-cell phone. But, nowadays, they are kind of special.

I like the webcam idea. Maybe try to find new ways to talk online. Like Twitter, or Facebook, Myspace, [Advicenators?], AIM, MSN, Yahoo, etc.

Maybe come up with a puzzle for him to solve through email, or through a letter. Send bits and pieces in a few different letters, like have him solve clues, and use the first letter of each answer to make a phrase, that ends up being like "I love you very much!" or something.

--Jack
(17/m)

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when i give my guy a hj/bj he cums and it gets on his shirt and like all over the place and im sure it isnt comfortable for him..im not going to lick it off of him or swallow ...are there any other things i can do so it won't get all over his shirt? and any other advice?i just started doing this lol thanks

Use a tissue or something.

And I like the idea of taking off his shirt.

--Jack
(17/m)

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I was a virgin until March of this year (I'm 17) and my boobs have always been the same size since I was about 15 and then suddenly within the past month and a half they grew almost a cup size, I had noticed it one day and mentioned it to my boyfriend (who also noticed) and he said it was probably from sex? And that sex matures your body..is this true? I didn't gain any weight so it wasn't that.

No, this is really unlikely.

Maybe it was just coincidence that it was after you had sex that you really started to grow.

--Jack
(17/m)

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17/f

I want to lose 10 pounds by august 27. If I drink lots of water walk 4 miles and eat very healthy do you think can? Any other good wAys to lose weight???

That would require you lose 1 pound a day.

Doctors and experts suggest that you only lose 2-3 pounds a week.

So, your weight-loss plan isn't advised and it's probably not going to happen.

If you eat healthy and do your plan, you might lose weight, but you won't lose 10 pounds.

--Jack
(17/m)

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I forget what its name is, but it's wider and thinner than Chewy bars, and its box has some kind of yellow on it. Its chocolate covered, and REALLY good :] and I've been dying to find it.

http://www.viewpoints.com/images/review/2008/84/10/1206371235-9384_full.jpg

Nature Valley?

--Jack
(17/m)

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anyone know how to get someone to like you?
not like like but friend wise?

cuz im goin into highschool. and im trying to be outgoing. but its tough.

thanks!

www.wikihow.com/Build-Self-Confidence

From there:

1. Recognize your insecurities. What does that voice in the back of your mind say? What makes you ashamed of yourself? This could be anything from acne, to regrets, to emotional abuse (past or present) from a loved one or friends at school. Whatever is making you feel unworthy, ashamed, or inferior, identify it, give it a name, and write it down.
2. Talk about it with friends and loved ones. Wear it on your sleeve. Each day you should chip away at it; wear it down. There's no quick fix. Get to the root of the problem; focus on it and understand that you need to resolve each issue before you can move on.
3. Remember that no one is perfect. Even the most confident people have insecurities. At some point in any of our lives, we may feel we lack something. That is reality. Learn that life is full of bumps down the road.
4. Identify your successes Everyone is good at something, so discover the things at which you excel, then focus on your talents. Give yourself permission to take pride in them. Give yourself credit for your successes. Inferiority is a state of mind in which you've declared yourself a victim. Do not allow yourself to be victimized.
5. Be thankful for what you have. A lot of the times, at the root of insecurity and lack of confidence is a feeling of not having enough of something, whether it's emotional validation, good luck, money, etc. By acknowledging and appreciating what you do have, you can combat the feeling of being incomplete and unsatisfied. Finding that inner peace will do wonders for your confidence.
6. Be Positive, even if you don't feel positive. Avoid self-pity, or the pity and sympathy of others. Never allow others to make you feel inferior--they can only do so if you let them. If you continue to loathe and belittle yourself, others are going to do and believe likewise. Instead, speak positively about yourself, about your future, and about your progress. Do not be afraid to project your strengths and qualities to others. By doing so, you reinforce those ideas in your mind and encourage your growth in a positive direction.
7. Look in the mirror and smile. Studies surrounding what's called the "facial feedback theory" suggest that the expressions on your face can actually encourage your brain to register certain emotions. So by looking in the mirror and smiling every day, you might feel happier with yourself and more confident in the long run.
8. Fake it. Along the same lines of smiling to make yourself feel happy, acting confident might actually make you believe it. Pretend you're a completely confident version of you; go through the motions and see how you feel.
9. Express yourself, whether it's through art, music, writing, etc. Find something you enjoy. Everyone is born with talents and strengths. You can develop and excel in yours. If it's difficult to name two or three things you have some ability in or just plain love to do, think about things others do that you would like to do too and take some lessons or join an enthusiasts club. When you're following your passion, not only will it have a therapeutic effect, but you'll feel unique and accomplished, all of which can help build your self confidence. Plus, adding a variety of interests to your life will not only make you more confident, but it will increase your chances of meeting compatible friends!
10. Stick to your principles. It might be tough, but if you don't have something you can believe in, you don't have anything. If you don't stand for something, you will fall for anything. No matter what's happened in your life, you can always lay claim to the fact that from this day forward, you've followed your principles to the best of your ability.
11. Help others. When you know you're kind to the people around you, and are making a positive difference in other people's lives (even if it's just being kinder to the person who serves you coffee in the morning) you'll know that you are a positive force in the world--which will boost your self confidence. Go volunteer twice a month at an elementary school. Bake something for your neighbor for no reason. Confidence that you have earned is the most long-lasting.
12. Stop worrying. What worries you today will be forgotten by you and people around you tomorrow. Can you remember what you were so worried about the same day the same time last week? If not, then you should not worry right now. You will not worry about it even one week from now.
13. Our body posture represents what we are at that particular time. Simple habit that we can learn and start to implement it are stand and sit correctly. Your great and nice body posture will speak for you. How you stand sends out a message to the World, and in turn, back to you.


--Jack
(17/m)

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I don't get it. Do guys like having sex with virgins? If so, why? Wouldn't they want someone experienced? I don't know. Just curious.

Some guys do. Why? Because it's like they are the first for a girl, and they'll always be remembered. At least, that's the impression I'm under.

--Jack
(17/m)

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I want to become a vampire. do not say "they do not exist." i am not crazy lol and this isnt really about twilight or anything. i just think it would be cool. dont say i cannot handle or survive or something like that. i just want to know how. im not talking about mythical vampires like the ones in movies. and what exactly are vampires? dont say mythical creatures. what powers do they have? and stuff like that. HOW! i am willing to accept the consiquences. much luv!

Here's what you do.

Find a vampire. Not hard, right?

Ok. Did you find your vampire?

Have them bite you in the neck. Your transformation has begun.

Now, just stay away from garlic and crucifixes, and you should be good.

--Jack
(17/m)

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19/f
okay so a three sum, yeah i know what it is but what exactly would happen if you had it with two guys? like i dont understand how that would work! i probably sound really stupid for asking, but i think it would be kind of fun ;)

Not for me.

But, as everyone has said, one guy probably engages in intercourse from the front or the behind while the girl engages in intercourse with the other guy through the mouth, as in, his manhood goes in her mouth.

Yay for being like Matt and not using obscene vocabulary!

--Jack
(17/m)

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