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May 13, 2008

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I am a 29/f that loves to listen and try to help out. I have always been the one people go to for advice.

I will tell you how I feel about it. If you don't like my answer, I'm sorry. However, usually what I say is true, people just can't handle the truth.

advice

should i ask a guy to marry me? becuase I'm so in love with him so bad, we been together for 3 year, i want get married, but should i ask him or wait?

It's funny you mentioned asking him. In a tradition set way when, during leap year, a female can legally ask a man on February 29th to marry him. Of course, the rules have changed since then, a female can ask a man anytime she darn well pleases now.

I say if you are old enough, love him enough, and are ready to take that step, by all means ask away. It may be unorthodox, but hey it's the 21st century and as women, we know what we want and we go after it.

Good Luck, I hope he says yes, and you two live a wonderful life together for the rest of your days!! ;)

a girl who have 15 partner, differnt guy to have sex with, is that considering as a whore?

You said girl, so I am assuming someone under the age of 16? If so, then yes I think that would constitute as unhealthy. I don't like using the word "whore" considering it's degrading and cruel.

Oki doki, before I start I would love to let you guys know that a) I love food. b) I had gallbladder issues c) I have Chronic Lyme Diease d) And yeah...

So, like I siad, I've had gallbladder issues which I thought made it to be that I felt like I was about to be sick when I ate food and what not. But when I got it out, it didn't help make me want to eat anymore, and when I am hungry, and when I get food, I feel super sick and when I see/hear/smell/think about food, I feel like I am about to throw up.
I've been trying to eat more, but sometimes i just don't eat because I am not hungry. My mom knows I try, but she keeps reminding me that if I don't try more (which I do try very hard) I will be one of those girls who gets tubes down her throat and what not so that I can get food. I don't want that, but I have no clue what to do...if anyone can help me, you won't believe how much I will love you guys...
Thanks so much in advance! ^^ if you guys need anymore info, please let me know!

First of all, how long has this been going on? If it is fairly recent, is there a possiblity that you are pregnant? This tends to go along the lines of morning sickness.

As for the gallbladder thing, have you had it removed? If you haven't that may be something to look into. From what I understand (my cousin had gallbladder problems and had it removed) the symptoms are more like that of IBS, where you immediately have to go to the bathroom following eating. The Chronic Lyme disease affects more in the same way as IBS, and your Auto Immune Disease, achy muscles, sore joints, painful skin, and muscle spasms. I don't think this would have anything to do with it.

I would suggest going to the doctor and getting an exam, blood and physical to rule out certain things, like pregnancy, stomach disease, or possibly poisoning (accidental of course).

One thing to do is make sure to drink plenty of fluid. This will at least keep you hydrated. Also, try eating a few saltine crackers to help with nausea. There is a drug out by prescription called Phenergan, this could help you also. Then, there are these bands that you put around your wrist that puts pressure on a certain pressure point called Sea Bands. Here is a link for those: http://www.morningsicknesshelp.com/seabands.html Another thing you could try is dramimine. It's the counter medicine that helps with motion sickness, it helps on nausea too.

I hope this helps. Good Luck!! I hope you get better soon.

Hello, I know this is a bit weird, but I am SO confused with my crush. I am in the 8th grade and I'm 14 and I go to an Arts school with a middle and a high school. Since I am more advanced in my instrument playing I get to the play with the high schoolers(I am very appreciative of this) and (oh, just to let you know, I play bass guitar) this boy (lets just call him Alex) also plays bass, he's in the 9th grade and he's really good. Sometimes I ask him for help and we talk a bit and even one time I got him in trouble for talking and he's the most quiet boy in class, so I do talk to him a bit more than everybody else does. Now, I find him interesting because he's the only quiet one out of all these obnoxious musicians. He never talks unless spoken to and I see that when we're not playing he watches other people's conversations, but HE NEVER TALKS. So I have a feeling he's incredibly shy, so how do I flirt with him and subtley hint that I like him without scaring him shitless? and also, how do I tell if he likes me or not because he never ever ever looks at me! He's allways looking the other direction and another time I was watching him play and I could tell I was making him really nervous so what do you think? Basically, how do I flirt with a shy guy and figure out if he likes me or not?please please help, I have NO IDEA how to flirt, thank you sooo much!

Maybe what you need to do is be direct instead of flirty. He may be the type that responds to more open affection than to sly trickery types.

If he is shy, then you need to try and get inside his bubble with him. He may not come out of his bubble, but he may let someone else in. Try asking him if he would like to do something after school sometime. You could even try and ask him for help after school with your playing, and if he would mind helping you out.

Get to know him outside of school and become friends. Then, maybe, you two could start something from there. It could be that he is just not comfortable in school and you may get to know the real him outside of school. I hope this helps. Good Luck!!

well for one, im a dude. but anyway, theres this girl i've been dating for the past 3 years off and on. and for 3 years, shes basicly has pulled me around by my nose i guess you could say. shes hurt me more times than i can count, but for some reason i still love her. (by the way, im 16, and i know yall goin say i dont know what love is, well trust me, i got a pretty good idea)but the problem is im tired of gettin hurt, i really am, and she knows shes hurting me. how she hurting me you say? well, shes real moody, i mean more than normal moody, and she'll get real ticked off and break up with me, then go out with another dude and rub it in my face. and yes i still love her through it. then she'll say shes sorry we'll get back together, and some other stuff will happen to break us up. im just i dont know... tired of it, but the problem is i still LOVE HER!! so what yall think i should do?

You came here for advice, and that's what you are going to get. I can't say that this won't sound harsh, but it seems to be what's going on. I hope I don't offend, but at least open your eyes to the way things are going.

First off, you may know what love is, but she seems as if she doesn't. She also seems as if she is just using you for her inbetween flings, kind of like a safety net for dating so she won't have to be alone. She seems very immature and selfish. Do you really want to spend any part of your life with someone like that?

I know you love her, but think of it this way. Isn't easier to get the pain done all at once instead of torturing yourself over and over again? What if you were to finally cut her loose, and then get over her once and for all, then find someone new who treats you better? It's time to cut that relationship off, and let her be the one who suffers this time, not you. Good Luck!!

Ok, here's the problem. I have a 10 yr. old sis that drives me absolutly insane. Everytime I go to my parents to keep her away from me, they ignore me! Even if I'm having an issue in school, or with myself, they just won't listen to me. Almost everyday, I feel shut out from everyone, and my sis is RLLY pissn me off. I need help pleez!

Here's the thing with little sisters, they just want to be with you (this is coming from a lil sister). They they that you are cool and idolize you because you are older. She could be trying to hang out with you because she really wants to be with you.

I know that it's annoying. I went from being a lil sister (still am, but don't think the world of my brother anymore), to a mom with two girls that are 3 years apart. The youngest tries her best to hang around her sister all the time. Luckily for me, they are still young and like to play with each other, but it does get on the oldests one's nerves.

I would suggest just trying to spend some time with her, when you can. It doesn't have to be anything special, maybe just watch a thirty minute show with her, like Hannah Montana or something. Maybe if she gets some hang out time with you, she will back off a little bit. After you watch the show or spend time with her, tell her (politely) ok I need to go and do some stuff on my own. At first, it still will hurt her feelings, but after time, she will be grateful that you even spent some time with her.

As for your parents, you need to go up to them and say "hey look, I am having some issues that I need your help with and I need you to listen to me. If you can't provide me help now, then think of what you are going to do when I make a bad decision and tried to come to you for help, and then get into trouble instead. Would you rather take the time to help me now, or be hurt by my actions later? Also, tell them that you didn't ask to be brought into this world, and it's the least they could do to actually be parental figures to you and help out."

I know if I actually had said those exact things to my parents, my lips would be walking beside me on the floor, saying OUCH, but you can try to get them to notice you. After all they owe you at least that. I hope things get better for you. Good Luck!!

ok so i had sex for the first time the other night. i know i was ready so please don't tell me any of that. but we didn't use a condem, yes, i know i'm stupid. i know he didn't come in me. i know i have a big chance of getting pregnant, buuut - i had stopped my period that morning. after i stop my periods i usually just spot bleed for about 2 or 3 days after, & i have been doing that after i had sex, so does this mean i'm for sure not pregnant ? pleaseee help me.

Ok, going to be honest and straight up. You won't know until your next period starts or doesn't show up. Unfortunately you can't know that soon if you are pregnant.

The reason why you are still bleeding, is because you were still partially on your period to begin with. Now for that I would say wait at least a full 48 hours after your last sign of bleeding before having intercourse.

16/f
Where can I find brightly colored skinny jeans (like what Mika wears alot) for a reasonable price (maybe under $40) and have a 34" inseam? Please don't tell me about the ones they have at Kohls, I've already tried those on and they are soooo short.

Thanks. ^_^

You could try these:

http://www.revolveclothing.com/DisplayProduct.jsp?product=HABI-WJ34
http://www.urbanoutfitters.com/urban/catalog/category.jsp?_DARGS=/urban/catalog/common/highlited_itemcount.jsp_A&_DAV=true&_dynSessConf=-5677622220866780775&viewAllOnOnePage=yes&itemCount=-1&pushId=&id=W_APP_JEANS_SKINNY&startValue=1&selectedProductColor=&navCount=252&navAction=poppush&sortby=&popId=
http://www.urbanoutfitters.com/urban/catalog/productdetail.jsp?_dyncharset=ISO-8859-1&_dynSessConf=3587438022222173849&itemdescription=true&itemCount=-1&id=13177829&parentid=W_APP_JEANS&sortProperties=%2Bproduct.marketingPriority%2C-product.startDate&navCount=4&_D%3AnavCount=+&navAction=poppush&color=60&_DARGS=%2Furban%2Fcatalog%2Fcommon%2Fitemlink.jsp
http://www.tobi.com/product/5642-ksubi-super-skinny-zip-hacienda-jeans-in-jade-denim-skinny-tapered
http://www.hottopic.com/hottopic/store/product.jsp?FOLDER%3C%3Efolder_id=2534374302028504&PRODUCT%3C%3Eprd_id=845524442161130&bmUID=1189625371295
Other places to check would be Old Navy, Macys, Papaya, AE, Hollister, Forever 21, or Pac Sun. I hope this helps.

I've been hurt many times in relationships and I've lost trust in guys. I became one of those girls who led guys on and dropped them, made plans I didn't intend on keeping and said things I didn't mean. I did that even to guys I liked. Now I'm changing things but the weird thing is I'm realizing I'm really into this guy i screwed over manyyy times. He isn't the best guys, he smokes ALOT, skips class, and drinks but for some reason I keep falling for him. He was one of the guys I actually did like but I made plans and didn't follow through 5 different times so hes pretty much lost all trust in me. I don't really know what to do because I don't want to want him but I can't help it. Well he ended up being at this party I was at and we talked and I appologized and he was being really sweet and cute. He tried to hook up with me and I didn't because my friend was already mad at me cause she says I was dancing like a whore so that probably didn't help things, turning him down. Me and him are friends but part of me really wants more. Everyone says I can do better than him but theres something about him that I can't let go of. For some reason even though he isn't the best guy and he isn't very attractive i feel like I can trust him. I don't know if I should go for him and work my ass off to try and get him or I should just try and move on (which hasn't been working.)

Ok, first off, about your friends, even though they mean well, and don't want to see you get hurt, it's not their decision to make. You can tell them look, I like him and I understand your feelings, but you have to respect mine, and kindly back off (you could say that nicer than I just did, but you get the picture).

Now, for the guy you like. I would just go to him, ask him to meet you somewhere for a talk, promise you will be there (and actually go ;)) and tell him how you feel. Let him know that you are not good with guys and are afraid of getting hurt and that's why you kept at arms length away. Just tell him you want to start a relationship and hope that he will feel the same way. Open and honest communication are key factors in any successful relationship.

As for the part that he's a "bad boy", so what? As long as you know your boundaries and don't do the same things that he does, you should be fine! Besides, it's about having fun in a relationship, not what can I do to make him better. You obviously like him inspite of his differences, so why not like him because of his differences.

I hope I've helped. Good Luck!! If you need any more help, I'm here.

which channel is the superbowl on and when does it come on? thanks!

I am so sorry, I just now checked my messages. It's to late to answer this question. I hope you found it!!

need seroios advice me and my well curent ex just broke up becouse she cheated well i havent been to school she always types to me that she misses me so much well she says she is not sure if she loves me but does says she doesnt love the chick she cheated on me with and from what it sounds like she wants to get back with me but ya i love her and want to its just shes sooooo confused theres alot more stuff 2 i dont know. she says all kinds of stuff about me good just dont know if shes trying to screw with my head or not do u think she really cares i need advice BAD truth is i have major depression problems and her doing this stuff to me is driving me insane

You think your confused? Have you actually read your question? :D I can't tell if you are a male or female?~)these are the things I do know: a) your ex is female b)she cheated on you with a chick c)your unsure if she wants you back d)you love her e)do we think she cares. Mind you sexual orientation doesn't matter, because that's not the question at hand, however, for future references, it'd be nice to know. :~D

Now, here's what I think you should do. Ask her straight out what it is she wants from you, if she's going to continue to tell you how much she misses you but then retracts her feelings when you try to get her back. Let her know that you love her and that you are willing to work things out, but you two have to communicate with each other. Let her know that you would rather she broke up with you first if she knows she is unhappy or wanting to be with someone else. At least this way, it doesn't hurt twice as bad because she cheated and broke up with you, double stings.

It does sound like to me, she is just trying to make sure she has a back-up plan when everything else falls downhill. If she doesn't have good luck with that one person, she wants to keep a leash on you so she won't be alone. It's selfish and hurts other people, but they don't tend to see that aspect of the story.

Just lay your cards down on the table, be honest, straightforward and make sure you let her know that you are willing to work this out, but not at the expense of your heart. Good Luck!!

whats so great about the superbowl?

It's definitely a man thing. Females tend to get all hyped about it too. Put it this way, it's the prom/wedding of our dreams/giving birth all wrapped up in one for avid football fans.

It shows the best of the best for this season's teams. Of course, others who are into college bowl, get to see the best of the best with them in several different bowl games, but nothing like the super bowl.

Also, it's a chance to always rival with someone about who will win. If one team beat badly, they are hoping for retribution. If their team made it to the super bowl, watch out they are going to be egomaniacs until the hype has calmed down about the game ;).

I hope that makes sense.

Does anybody know what the hidden message in the artwork is?

I've been trying to figure it out for agess :[

somebody please tell me its killing mee
thankks :)

Ok, did some research, and it was hard to find. I am not sure if this is correct, but it is the only one I have found.

"Nothing is easier than self deceit, for what each man wishes, that he also believes to be true."

Does that look right? I hope I've helped.

is it weird that I dont' think sex is a big deal like I want to just give it away to get rid of me being a virgin is that normal

Yes and No. Yes, because that is one of the most intimate things a person can do, and it should have some meaning to you, or at least your chasity should.

No because everyone talks so much about it, and the privacy that sex should withhold is no longer an issue. It's like putting on make-up for some, with no cares as to knows who, what, where, when, why and how. When people make it sound like such an everyday kind of thing, it doesn't make it appealing anymore.

I would say that you should wait until you find someone that you at least care for. The first time can bring on many emotions that you wouldn't think of.

If your a girl, you have to worry about the pain and the tearing of the hymen. You would probably want someone who is willing to go slow, care about you and help you through it. You don't want someone who is going to be forceful, non-caring, and even helpful.

Just make sure to give it thought. You won't want to make a mistake that you will regret for the rest of your life.

hey im 13 years old and in jr high school their is always soo much drama, and one of my friends alana.. she is ALWAYS sooooo sad.

like one time she was like my cousin died and i miss him so muchh
and it was so awkward because i didnt knoww what to say. i didnt know how to make her feel better.
and she would just be like, saying these deep things and how she was so sad and missed him so much and i wouldnt know what to say.. what do i say to make people feel better with things like this??

also.. she always comes to me like "the guy i like ALOT doesnt like me. he told me who he likes and its not me im so sad"

i dont know what to say to that either. and it just gets really awkward.

so how can i give advice on stuff like this betterr?
help =)

In times like this, the best thing you can do for her is give her a shoulder for support. Just tell her that you are always here for her to listen to her. Let her know that you are sorry she's going through this. I have learned that asking questions to someone to get them thinking of options is the best way to go. This way, if anything were to go wrong, at least you didn't give her the idea, you just showed her other options that are available to her. (Thus, possibly saving your friendship) Good Luck and remember offering moral support can sometimes be better than putting your two cents in anyways.

do those things really work? i dont really believe in them. or maybe im doing it wrong? or my hands are moving to the letters..? are seances better?

This is a belief thing. If you believe it works, then it might work. If you don't believe, then it won't work. I am not sure myself if it does or doesn't. I have tried to play around with one but got no reaction or response. However, it could be based on individuals that have a connection with the spiritual world. I am not one of those people. I hope I've helped.

i'm not trying to be rude or offensive at all but i just want to know...are the japanese offended when you call them japs? why?

Ok, yes most people find such terms as racists. I am not of the orient, however, I have enough common sense than to actually to say that. (not that I am saying you don't)

Look at it this way, it's like calling an African-American an explicit, or a Latino person a wet-back, or you get the picture right? It just felt wrong to say that even in explanation. (Please, all the other nationalities do not get offended, I think nothing like this, this was just for example)

So basically, it's a racism thing. I would steer clear of saying this word. I hope I've helped.

what happens if youre on your period and you dont wear a tampon (only pads) when you have to take your pee test.

Well, considering the urine comes from a different area, not much would happen. However, you can have traces of blood in your urine because of your period.

If you are seeing a doctor about a UTI, kidney, or bladder infection, you may want to bring this up because it could be the reasoning for the blood in the urine.

I will say though, when this happens, you don't actually see the blood, it's detected by a strip they use to test it.

If you are talking about a urine test for drugs, it will not affect anything.

If you are talking about a urine test for a pregnancy test, um....wait, you wouldn't be on your period, nm. lol. I hope I've helped.

ok so i kinda have back and neck problems.

MY whole back usully hurts like everyday on and off!and i'm only 19. The bottom back of my neck hurts too all the time. The pain in my neck feels like the pain in your neck when you get really stressed and then your neck starts to hurt. thats what it feels like, so i say to myself maybe it's stress, but i cannot be stressing ALL the time. My legs aren't numb or anything, because i know there is a type of back thing where if your legs get numb it's serious. I used to sleep on an extremely soft bed and i thought that was the cause of the back pain so i switched to a hard bed about a month and a half ago but the back pain hasn't stopped. And now i am really worried about it. Does anyone know what it could be?

Also, i go this workout thing called hip hop abs and when i do it i sometimes my head starts to hurt, like there is pressure in my head. Is that a bad thing?

PLEASE ANSWER ASAP!!!!
THANK YOU!

Honestly, you'd be surprised just what stress can do to your body, even when you think you are not stressing. What I would suggest is to a)take a warm bath in epsom salts and lavendar oil and/or b) see a chiropractor. You may need an adjustment. Good Luck!!

when is it too early to loose your virginity. not only age wise but relationship wise, physically, emotionally.

thank you!
and i know this is an opinionated question but thats what i want. people's opinions

I think it all depends on the maturity level of the person. Now, I would definitely say that it is too young if you are under the age of 14, but that's my opinion. You have to be able to handle the situation on a mature level. Knowing the consequences of doing this and what could happen to a person if something bad were to happen, i.e. pregnancy, STD's, or emotional scarring (depending on how someone reacts to the experience).

For someone who is having sexual activity for the first time, they need to consider even more options, like is this really what I want to do? Do I want to save myself for marriage, or at least until I know I am in love with someone? Is this going to ruin my image with myself? How would it affect my parents if they were to find out?

Anyone that has sex, needs to also make sure they are practicing safe sex. For a female, they need to be on the pill or something equivalent. For a male, they need to make sure they are wearing a condom. When it comes to sex, the best thing to do is practice safely. I hope I've helped.

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