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about
I'm Jack/Jamie.I'm 28 years old. I graduated from Michigan State University with my Bachelor of Science in Chemistry. GO GREEN! Now I'm a high school chemistry teacher in New York City living with my husband in a small studio apartment we pay way too much money for.
I've been on this site for 14 years as of March 23, 2020.
You may have seen me as CuxMiBeckNow7, but I've since shortened my name.
my forum
My FAQ
Here is my Recommended Columnist of the Decade for the 2020s:
Laura!
--Jack
advice
hi. ok well i bought some proactiv because my face has been getting a lot of pimples and my cleanser like wont work anymore so i bought some but it wont be here until like at least Saturday and my face looks really bad! is there a product i can buy at the store that will clear up my face really quickly? ive been using stuff but nothing is really working! i need a product that can clear up my pimples in a couple days! if you could help me i would REALLY appreciate it! thank you!!! :)
http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=507367
From there:
Hey. I know this sounds weird, odd, strange, etc., but what I'm about to say to you ACTUALLY works:
Get some lemon juice. You got the lemon juice? Alright- now take the lemon juice- and take a Q-tip and dab some lemon juice onto your zit with the lemon juice. Just a thin layer- not the whole bottle, silly! =D
Alright- so doing this at night is the best thing to do- it will really reduce the size and shape of the zit- and you won't know it was there in a few days.
Make sure not to touch it with your fingers after you put on the lemon juice- the oils from your fingers will stop the effect.
Relax- everyone gets zits- so you're only normal =D.
And here's a forum discussion from one of my friends on here that talks a lot about acne:
http://www.advicenators.com/talkaboutmetopic.php?t=368&userboard_id=35415
From there:
Acne pretty much sucks ass and we all hate them.
I'll pretty much share what I know and my experiences.
So, I used to have really bad acne for like 2 freaking years. It sucked and I hated it. But now I'm better and here are my views on stuff:
Dermatologists are hard to get an appointment with and very pricey. They don't do much except look at you once, then they have their assistants take care of you after the dermatologist her/himself prescribes you acne medicine. It's usually Differin [sp?] and Benzaclin [sp?].
OTC Medicine:
Not all medication work effectively on all people. I've learn that it doesn't work for me or for anyone with sensitive skin. It may work for some people but as soon as they stop the use, acne comes back. Whether it's a cream, gel, or oral medication, they all suck! They dry out your skin, irritate it, increase sunburns/tans, and enlarge your pores. Not your dream skin, huh? And ironically, they sometimes make it worse. And you know what the 'best' part is? They're freakishly expensive! And once you stop the medication, acne comes back and parties like there's not tomorrow. Oral medication also makes your insides bad =/
Acne Products:
Acne face wash, gel, cream, whatever. Proactive seems to be a big one, too. Anywhos, as I've mentioned above, some work for some people while it makes everything worse for other people. It all depends. But most of the time, all those products dry your skin out, irritate it, and/or makes your acne worse. And it enlarges your pores too. Again, not very dreamy. And if they do work, as soon as you stop using them, they come back. Same line second verse.
So what the hell are you suppose to do?
Go the natural, cheap way.
Washing your face:
Wash your face gently only twice a day. Once is okay, I guess. But washing your face when you get up and before you go to bed is a good idea. More than twice a day could irritate your skin. Also, do not scrub your face, wash it gently as if you were washing a baby. Use face friendly products, too. I recommend a brand called Cetaphile. It's gentle on your skin and softens it. PAT your face dry with a clean towel.
Towels and pillow cases:
Try and change them as much as you can. Every day would be PERFECT but hard to do sometimes.
Squeezing:
Not only does that sound disgusting, it is. And it leaves nasty scars. Don't touch your face at all unless you have a slight itch. Don't rest your chin/cheeks in your hands or your arm. Just leave it alone as if it was a $10,000,000 mask that if you touch, you'll get arrested for. Oh, and try to keep your hair out of your face.
Sleeping:
Sleeping plays a big, huge role. Your body starts to renew its skin starting around 10PM and ending around 2AM. So be sure to be sleeping somewhere in between or the entire time. Sleeping early helps, and getting adequate sleep improves your skin and its tone.
Eating:
Milk makes acne worse. It's scientifically proven. Junk foods, sweet, sugars. ALL BAD FOR YOU PERIOD. Avoid/limit them along with sodas even if they're diet. Sports drink contain loads of sugar. Juices, too. Instead, eat healthy foods like veggies and fruits! I've noticed that my skin improve immensely when I turned vegetarian. So maybe give a shot to eating lots of veggies and fruits and other healthy stuff and cut down on meat? Also try and drink green tea [tea bag with no added sugar] or green tea with aloe [again, tea bag with no added sugar].
Masks:
Home made masks are probably the best. Here are few that work and softens your skin:
1. Red ginseng syrupy liquid thing mixed with warm water and a bit of all purpose flour. Make a mask thing with that.
2. Green tea [tea bag] cooled down to room temperature. Splash it on your face for 5min or so. I know it sounds weird but it helps. Or mix it with a little bit of all purpose flour and make a mask.
3. Mix warm milk, honey, and all purpose flour. Make a mask with that.
Only do the mask right after you washed your face. Make sure you don't put on any lotion and what not. Do not leave it on for more than 10-15min because bacteria will become attracted to the mask. Do not laugh, squint, whatever. Just keep your face neutral or you'll get wrinklies. Do not peel the mask off. Slowly wash it off GENTLY with LUKEWARM water. Keyword: GENTLY.
Lotions and make ups and what not:
Lotions/Sunblocks have products that won't clog pores, are fragrance and oil free. I suggest you buy from either Neutrogena or...some other renown company. I use Neutrogena's Oil Free Moisturizing Face Lotion and Neutrogena's Oil Free 55 SPF Sunblock. And Aveeno's 50 SPF Sunblcok [oil free] sometimes.
Make up should be limited to only eye and lip make up. No foundation, no concealer, not blush, no powder. Get my drift? Good. If you MUST wear make up, limit it down to special occasions [School does NOT count] and take it off as soon as you can. Whatever you do, do NOT go to bed with make up on!
--Jack
(16/m)
i bought this perfume and it smells like cherry vanilla (more like vanilla) and i love the smell but i was wondering if guys like the scent vanilla. i have a couple perfumes and a bunch of body sprays and stuff but i really like my vanilla perfume. the thing is i want to create a 'scent'. which means you always wear a hint of a certain smell. because people arent supposed to wear different smells everyday arent they? and vanilla is subtle but a nice smell you can pick up on. but i really want to have a scent that guys like. please help me with this whole scent and perfume thing cause obviously im just goin off of what i think. so ya just explian this whole scent thing to me and then please someone tell me what scents guys like!!
Too much perfume is just irritating.
Vanilla smells good, and I guess fruity is good, too, but it all depends on the guy.
Try out a few different ones and see what guys seem to respond to ;]
Smiling helps, too ;]
--Jack
(16/m)
16/m
so, i'm a lifeguard at the local pool/waterpark. it's outdoor, so it's a popular place during the summer, and of course it's full of beautiful girls in bikinis.
so, recently i've had a lot of these girls start trying to talk to me. they usually are just like "heyyyy. what's your name?" and such. . . it's kinda nice to get the attention.
however, i always get way too nervous about it and just reply and keep walking. i'm always too afraid that i'll embarrass myself or something. i don't really know what it is, but i'm afraid to go up and start a conversation with these beautiful girls. . . i don't know what it is.
how can i work up the courage to talk to them?
thanks in advance
Just relax! Guys can get really nervous about this kind of stuff, but I've read a lot on here that girls get ten times as nervous.
Like Laura below said, smile and just act natural.
Here's some flirting tips that may or may not help you:
http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=543909
1. Smile! If you're not smiling, chances are the girl won't be interested.
2. Don't always talk about yourself, let her talk about herself, too! Balance the conversation. Yes, conversations are a HUGE way to flirt more indirectly ;]. Just talk how you would with one of your friends. have confidence in yourself and the girl will definitely notice ;]
3. Think about what you do. Don't just blindly go around flirting with everyone. Some people don't want to flirt, and you can tell by their body language, facial expressions, etc.
4. Be nice. I can't tell you how many times I've seen guys be jerks. It's SO irritating. If you're not nice, then it isn't worth the effort. Girls don't like jerks.
5. BE YOURSELF! I know you said not to say this, but as the above question told you, if you aren't yourself- who are you going to be? You aren't being truthful with the girl if you're making up things about yourself or you're doing things you normally wouldn't do. The girl will get the wrong impression and may like something about you that isn't even a part of you.
6. HAVE FUN! If you aren't at least doing that, I don't know what to tell you ;]
--Jack
(16/m)
okay.. well, this might sound bad but...
i only eat one meal a day or sometimes just one poptart or a pizza pocket.
but i am not hungry and i dont want to eat if im not starving.
i really want to loose weight.
will this help?
i'm not starving myself so yeah...
Yeah, you'll lose weight, but this is SO unhealthy and SO bad for your body. Eating ONE poptart a day is NOT enough nutrition for you.
In order to really lose weight correctly, you have to cut your portions, but still get all of the needed nutrients each day. And, you should be doing about 30 minutes of exercise a day on top of the diet.
Eating one thing a day will definitely hurt you in the long run. Malnutrition is a serious dietary problem. Please don't do that to yourself.
--Jack
(16/m)
14/female.
so i have this friend that kinda lies about stupid things... uh, what should i do about it?
http://www.answerbag.com/q_view/10497
From there:
Usually people lie because they are afraid of the consequences of the truth. The only way to get someone to stop lying to you, is to change the reactions that one might have after hearing the truth. Therefore causing the person doing the lying not to feel compelled to lie in order to protect themselves from the potentially harmful negative emotional reaction of the other person.
There is a quote that I find fitting about this subject:
"The [person], whose behavior indicates, that [they] will make a scene if [they are] told the truth, asks to be deceived."
If that doesn't help, I'll answer more in depth.
--Jack
(16/m)
There's this boy I have known since 1st grade and we've dated three times now and we just broke up a few months ago and I've moved on but I can't seem to get him off my mind....I'm still in love with him....and i don't know if he feels the same about me....what should I do....someone please help me!
Sometimes pursuing someone you've dated/broken up with many times is not the best thing to do.
I suggest you get over him and move on [not to sound harsh]. There are other fish in the sea =].
http://www.whatithinkabout.com/how-to-get-over-a-guy-girl/
That will help for a bit.
http://www.wikihow.com/Get-over-a-Guy-You-Liked
From there:
1. Invite some friends over, and watch some chick flicks. Get fun and upbeat movies like "John Tucker Must Die"
2. Get some money, and get a new haircut that is fun and flirty, and invest in some new makeup! If you usually wear red, try coral!
3. Grab a good book, and some jelly beans (any candy/food works) and just get lost in the book
4. Spend a day with other single friends and spend the night rating cute (single) guys! Find a new crush! You never know!
5. Open your mind and realize that if he deserved you, he would be with you.
6. Throw a party.
7. Call your friends and have a good laugh!
8. Shop! Splurge!
9. Write down every single thing that annoyed you about him. Then read it and realize he is not only not perfect, but also not perfect for you.
10. Exercise! Work it, girlfriend! Over the weekend work out, eat great and when the weekend's over, he's going to take one look and say "Boy, she does look good."
11. Grab a bottle of soda, a cute cup, and a friend go one for one saluting all the good things in life.
12. Listen to funky music!
13. If you delete him from your buddylist, phonebook, and everything else. Completely stop messaging - texting - calling - IMing - spending time - with him all together and you will get over him. Trust me.
14. The more time you spend thinking about him, the harder it will be to get over him.
15. Remind yourself that he's just another guy.
16. If he flirts with you, then ignore him. He's like a mosquito; you have to swat him.
17. And if he's rude to you, you be rude to him.
18. Get rid of everything that reminds you of him...including his phone number
* You can always just cry and get it all out of your system so you don't have to worry about it.
* Remember that there are millions of other guys out there.
* Don't be mad at yourself if a guy ever turns you down. There always is a reason for something happening. You might never figure it out though.
* Accept that you're still attracted to that guy, but try to become interested in other guys.
* Chocolate is good, but don't overdo it.
* You have to try to stay optimistic.
* Try to avoid spending time with him if possible. It's harder to get over someone you're always thinking about.
* Know that there is someone perfect out there for you, not a jerk that broke your heart.
* Write a letter to him explaining how you feel but do not send it.
* Delete his number from your phone to avoid texting and calling him.
* Don't be fooled by his charm when you bump into him
* Get a pet. Play with it, take care of it. It's a much better replacement than dating another guy you don't really like.
* Start introducing yourself to other guys....then get their number and call and talk to them.....that's what my sister did and she fell in love with someone else.:)
* go out parting with friends.. TO AVOID SEEING HIM.. that doesn't mean go out to the same party you know hes going to be at.
* Secretly put your friend's favorite candy in their pocket and watch them wonder how it got there. If you focus your energy outwards to make someone happy, you'll forget all about ol' whatshisname!
* EXERCISE! it really helps. and leaves you feeling re- charged and gives you time to think and stuff :D
* Start looking extra hot so you get attention from other guys. It gives you confidence and it might help earn you someone else.
* If he starts being charming, think of it as a cheap way of comming on to you. That way he'll seem stupid and desprate. (the more turn offs the better.)
There you go =].
--Jack
(16/m)
so i cannot stop thinking about this one guy and i really just want to stop thinking about him and just get him out of my life.. that sounds really stupid but eh its complicated he's really out of my league.
how do i get him out of my head.
and stop thinking about him before i go to sleep.
http://www.wikihow.com/Get-over-a-Guy-You-Liked
http://www.wikihow.com/Get-over-a-Guy
http://www.whatithinkabout.com/how-to-get-over-a-guy-girl/
The last website is HILARIOUS and I promise it will help you ;]
--Jack
(16/m)
13/f
Ok im going into the 8th grade and i have never had a boy friend. It's not like im realy lonley or anything. It's just at school and stuff I always see my friends with their boy friends and I feal left out. And when me and my friends go to the movies or mall they always bring their boy friends and I hate not having one. I'm not ugly or anything either but guys never ask me out and im way to afraid of being turned down. I know im only 13 but my friends have ben in many many relation ships and i dont mean like a week they always go out for a while and that makes me feal so inexperienced. What should I do?
http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=505520
From there:
I'm going to tell you that relationships aren't all they are cracked up to be. Sure- they are fun having someone to share things with and be with. But they involve a huge commitment and if you end up with someone who is clingy- they'll want to be with you every minute of every day- and you might not have time for friends or anything else you want to do. I say this because one of my ex-girlfriends was sort of like that- and got mad if I was busy with other plans.. and it was just really retarded.
What I mean is, you shouldn't feel in such a rush to date. Just because your friends are doing it doesn't mean you HAVE to. If they all jumped off a tall building, would you do it too? ;]
If anything, you should be proud of yourself for having been single for 13 years and that you haven't just dated whoever just to date. That's what I'm sure a few of your friends have done.
Your friends aren't leaving you out from their activities, so I don't think you're really left out. Sure, you could find a boyfriend, but would that really make you feel anymore "in"? If it's just for that reason, I promise you that you wouldn't, and your relationship would end quickly.
--Jack
(16/m)
13/female
okay so i like this guy and hes 18 and my parents dont approve. i see age as just a number. and hes not the type that just wants some. so how do i get my parents to compromise with me?
Age is just a number for adults. The difference is illegal, and now that I think about it, your parents won't give in, and it's probably best that you find someone your own age. I'm sure there are plenty of 18 year olds out there who aren't looking for sex, but it's pretty odd when an 18-year old is with a 13-year old. I think he is just looking for sex as much as he may tell you otherwise.
--Jack
(16/m)
Hey there.
(Just to warn you, this is gonna be really long.. I'm sorry =/ But please just hear me out on it.)
So there's this guy, Chris. He goes to school with me, but he'll be a senior and i'll be a sophomore.
We both play soccer at our school, which means we practice together sometimes during the summer (aka now, haha) and we play them in a few scrimmages during our season.
Anywho..
I really like this kid. He makes me feel really good about myself, he treats me like a princess, compliments me when I look and feel like crap, ya know. And I have problems with my heart, and he told me once that "you know I'm always here, I can fix your heart anytime" (:
But my parents are really weird about having people over, so the only time I see him and talk to him is at soccer, where we're both sweaty and busy practicing.
Other than that, I talk to him a lot on the computer, like a lot a lot. I've been known to stay up past 4 in the morning talking to him. It's because he doesn't have a cell phone, so we can't text or anything.
You see, I've had boyfriends before, but none of them were really that serious. I just got out of a relationship where my boyfriend was really mean to me, disrespectful, all that jazz. So I'm not exactly ready to jump back on the relationship-bandwagon.
But this guy, Chris, he says some really weird stuff to me. Like he tells me he loves me, and how much he loves me, all the freaking time.. And just yesterday he was saying how we're gonna get married after I graduate and go adopt kids. (I don't really want to actually have kids.)
But anyways, I do like him.. He's a really great guy, he's smart & funny, and he's good at soccer, if it makes a difference, haha. But it makes me uncomfortable when he says stuff like that, about getting married and how he loves me and stuff, cause I'm only 15. I don't know if I want to marry him, I don't know what true love is, I just feel like I'm getting in over my head here.
Oh, and he is really, and I mean REALLY, defensive. Like one time he was telling me about how he chipped the ball, and it hit the crossbar and came back and racked him, and I said "haha way to go." He freaked out on me. He was like "whatever. i guess you don't love me." and all that. So I have to say "chris i love you blah blah blah" or he won't talk to me. But then in the end, after he pissed me off by making me prove that I love him, he's like "haha gotcha. i was jk the whole time"
And one last thing. Today, after the guys were done practicing, the girls still had like 30 minutes of practice left, and two of the guys stayed to help. One of them, PG, is our goalie's older brother, who I'm friends with. The other guy, Kyle, I knew him through Facebook, honestly, haha but I'd never gotten the chance to talk to him. But we were doing World Cup, where you get partners and try to win the "Cup" by scoring 5 goals per "team." Kyle was on my team, because my usual partner wasn't at practice. After Kyle and I had scored like 4 goals, I saw Chris pull up in his truck. I guess he left his ball there or something. Anyways, I didn't think anything of it, and we kept on playing. After Kyle scored our last goal, we did a little chest-bump thing (haha we were kinda hyper and really tired) and then I hugged him, cause we won. But Chris came up and was like "dude what the heck was that." and kyle just said "we won...?" So Chris stormed off, and hasn't talked to me since.
I'm really confused about this and everything.. I don't know what to do.
Thanks so much for your time.
I hope you don't mind me giving a short answer to supplement your long question ;]
I think he seems a little possessive of you, and that kind of scares me. Sure, he can be romantic, but sometimes one small bad thing can ruin all of the good things- not all the time, but sometimes.
I say that you shouldn't be in a rush to date, especially when you've already gone through a bad breakup. You have a lot of years left to date; enjoy your single life while it lasts ;]
--Jack
(16/m)
what would be your ideal first date?
whats the romantic(ist) thing you've ever done?
whats the [k][i][n][k][y][s] thing you've ever done?
describe the most hottest, steamest $ex you've ever had?
I'm only going to answer the first two questions, because the last two are inappropriate and don't really apply to me. I'm not kinky and I don't have sex dreams ;].
1. My ideal first date is something simple and fun. Not something really serious and involved. Like I don't want to go to a really fancy restaurant- that's too much. Maybe going to the park or going to a movie or something and just hanging out. =]
2. The most romantic thing I've ever done is... well, I guess the fact that I write poems. I've pretty much done it for all of my girlfriends, and they've all really loved it I guess. Poetry is pretty romantic, I'd say.
It isn't specifically my job to tell you this, though I guess it may be since I'm a Level 1 moderator... but please, in the future, ask separate questions ;]
--Jack
(16/m)
16/f what are good stores to shop at like forever21, charlotte russe, and wet seal? (besides body central and 5,7,9) online shopping works too :)
I had my friend Alanna help me ;]
Debs, A&E, Aeropostale, Pink, and H&M.
Haha, trust me, I didn't come up with these on my own.
--Jack
(16/m)
i'm not sure if this is true or not, but to me i see that girls only have TWO holes. but apparently i also hear that girls have THREE HOLES?!
1. butt hole
2. pee hole
3. sex hole??
is that true? if so, where is this "sex hole"?
A girl's vagina is her "sex hole".
--Jack
(16/m)
I'm 16/f
I wish I had one of those moms or sisters that I could just talk to and be cool with, but I don't. Advicenators helps when I have short questions, but some of my thoughts I think if someone just sat there and talked through it with me I wouldn't feel like I was gonna explode all the time. I mean everyone needs that person where they can just TALK, right?
Does anyone know another site or something that has people that will just listen?
-A
To be honest, the reason I'm on this site is to help people, and so therefore I wouldn't mind if you asked me inbox questions or if you emailed me once in awhile or talked with me on my forum through this site.
I've been told I'm the "go to" friend by a lot of my friends, and a lot of them actually ask me for advice.
I've helped over 1,500 people so far on this site, and I would very much like to help you.
Send me an inbox and I'll send you my email or I'll give you the link to my forum ;]
--Jack
(16/m)
I don't know if this is the right category but here goes. My friend (&yes, i'm being serious that this is my friend and not me) told me that she can't eat and food makes her want to throw up.
She's one of my closest friends so idk what to do to help her cause I'm not a doctor or anything. I was wondering if anyone here ever had that happen or knows anything to help it.
If this helps, she's healthy, 13, and has not had any issues with anorexia/bulemia.
thanks in advance.
Hmm.. I would tell her to go see a doctor. I'm not really sure what's wrong with her, and it could be anorexia or bulimia developing or maybe she's sick [not just a cold].
I'm not a doctor and I cannot diagnose her, so my only suggestion is to tell her to go to a doctor. If she doesn't listen, tell her parents.
--Jack
(16/m)
So, theres this guy i really like that i work with and he finaly asked me for my aim and phone number and we've been talking (mostly on aim), anyway, recently he asked me if i wanted to hang out with him, the first time we went to the movies, and the second time we went downtown to these shops he wanted to show me... anyway, tomorow him and i are hanging out with some of his friends. how do i know if hes actually interested in dating me or just being friends without asking him? please help!
I think he's interested in dating you. What guy would take a girl on three dates and NOT want to date her? ;]
http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=506340
From there:
I'm going to give you a list of what guys tend to do when they like girls:
1. They don't call you "sexy". They call you "beautiful", "gorgeous", "amazing", etc.
2. They make an effort to hug you. They might high-5 instead, but it really depends on the guy in question.
3. They DO find any reason to touch you in some way. Mostly it ISN'T in a sexual way. Its more of just an excuse to remember what you feel like, I guess. Its hard to explain...
4. He is always smiling around you. If you're feeling bad and he's around- he'll be smiling because he knows that he's there to help you- and that's like brownie points for a guy if they can help a girl out. That, like the above, is hard to explain.
5. He'll tell you things about himself that he normally wouldn't tell everyone. He opens up to you. Guys don't get a chance to do that when pressured to "be manly".
6. If you have a feeling that a guy likes you- you're probably right. Guys aren't the best at hiding it- and girls are even better at figuring these type of things out.
If you like this guy- and he does all or most of those things- my best bet is that he does like you. That means one and only one thing: Ask him to make sure, and then try the relationship out. Who knows- it could be great!
--Jack
(16/m)
What are some musicals that are good?
Thats a dumb question, but i mean like which ones do people suggest? =]
Hmm...
1. CATS
2. Phantom of the Opera [seeing it this August!]
3. Wicked [seeing it this August, too!]
4. Hairspray
5. Annie
6. Little Shop of Horrors
7. Thoroughly Modern Millie
8. Beauty and the Beast
9. Honk!
10. Bye, Bye, Birdie!
--Jack
(16/m)
15/f
I have a lump kinda like a bubble? On my right breast near the center and it hurts when I rub against it or touch it ...I really don't know what it is but its pretty big ...does anyone know what it is? I'm scared it could be cancer ..
It's already been said, but I would like to reiterate for the sake of reiterating ;]
Please, please, please go see a doctor. Go tell your mom right now and tell her to schedule an appointment for very soon [tomorrow at best], and have her take you.
It very well could be cancer, and if it's only been there a month or so, it could be in it's early stages and it is easier to treat.
Then again it might not be cancer, but better safe than sorry.
--Jack
(16/m)
What age should you start having sex? I really just have to know because I'm afraid I might do it too early or too late. Thanks for the time.
Legally, you shouldn't have sex until you've passed the age of consent in your state/country.
Morally, you shouldn't have sex until you're married, or based on when you feel you're morally ready.
Emotionally, you shouldn't have sex until ready to face the consequences of sexual relationships. That is, possible pregnancy, having a child, etc.
Financially, you shouldn't have sex until you're old enough to support a possible child.
To me, you shouldn't have sex until you're married, though obviously not everyone lives up to that standard. But definitely DON'T have sex until you're ready, and I mean absolutely ready to face the consequences.
I think if you wait until you're married or at least with the person you will marry and will be with your entire life, it will mean something really special, rather than something to just throw around.
--Jack
(16/m)
how can i become an amazing kisser?
http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=542507
From there:
I know this sounds really lame, and I'm sure it is ;]
But just go with the flow. I don't really have experience in how to "properly" kiss, nor do I have experience with kissing at all! Can you say prude? ;]
Anyway- if it's your boyfriend/girlfriend- just be honest with him/her. Tell them you're nervous and you don't really know what you're doing. Apparently the people who are less-experienced is a big turn-on to some people.
Do what you feel comfortable with. If something feels awkward or uncomfortable, don't do it. If it feels right, ask the person if they are okay with that, and if they are- then you'll be fine.
There really isn't a CORRECT way to do it. Everyone does what they are comfortable with.
From my weak experience- this is what I can tell you:
1. Don't come on strong- it's really awkward for the other person.
2. Don't slobber all over the other person.
3. Don't stick your tongue all the way down their throat.
My friend on here, Laura, answered a question similar to this, and she gave a great answer. I will copy her answer, but know that credit goes to her.
www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=542699
Honestly, you could read a book about it, and you'd probably forget everything once you went in for the kiss.
Explore. Do what feels right. Make it fun, playful, romantic, whatever you want it to be. Don't make it all about jamming your tongue down his throat, and try not to drool all over him, because it's generally less than desireable to do so.
If you come off as confident it'll be a lot more fun. If all evening you're thinking "Oh my gosh, this is going to be bad" you won't enjoy yourself. Follow his lead at first, if you're truly that nervous.
And really, it's almost impossible to find a truly bad kisser. If anything, they might do something you're not used to; give it a chance before you hate it. Who knows, he might be thinking the same thing right now about you!
Over time, you'll develop your own personal style of kissing/making out, and that's not a bad thing. Do whatever feels good/right to you, and gets a positive reaction. For example, some people love a gentle, or less than gentle, bite of the lip, "necking", and other techniques. Like I already said, experiment & make it fun!
From personal experience I'd advise that you brush your teeth and floss, and have some mild mints with you, like TicTacs. Fruity is usually good, and less overpowering. If you're at a party, don't worry too much about what you're eating if you're both eating the same things, but a huge plate of hummus & extra garlic is a bad choice right before kissing =P. That's where mints come in handy for both of you. Casually offer him one if he's been gorging on something stinky.
--Jack
(16/m)