helpachick's advice column

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Q: Heyy. I just wanted to know what clothing stores you reccomend. I'm looking to buy new clothes for summer. Maybe links and such. Just cute clothes from different sotres that you like. Just not super duper expencive. I like Delias, but I can't fit into they're jeans (too big), and I like forever 21. I even like Abercrombie. I would aslo like to know some stores that you might think I could fit into they're jeans. I'm rather small. 00's don't fit me, unless they run small.
Thanks so much for your time!

hey! i love shopping..so this is a good question for me to answer:P
-aeropostale
-hollister
-american eagle
-maurices
-buckle
-dillards/jcpenney/sears/macy's/you get the pic
-pacsun
-old navy
-Kohls
there are certain brands of jeans that run small usually..one i know for sure does is Mudd.
have fun! xoxo helpachick

Q: Theres this girl i really like in my class when she found out i liked her she told her friends well im dating someone and she actually was and she told me this that she had a bf like 4 or 5 times and she wrote me a note saying i should repsect dat she already had a bf. Now could this mean she likes me but she has a bf at the moment and maybe i could be her bf in the future when she breaks up wid him and she is like kinda nervous and shy around me and quiet and i catch her looking at me my fair share of times help plzzz i really like this girl.

hey! i kno someone who's going through this right now too. if i were you, i would continue to be her friend and always be there for her and continue talking with her and everything. then if she does break up with her boyfriend, that's when you have the right to make your move. she is obviously pretty interested in her boy too, so she doesn't want to feel like she's playing him if she gets kind of flirty with you while their still dating. just give everything some time, because things between people change, and then maybe someday you two could go out. i bet she probably likes you too, and that's why she a little shy and quiet around you. she might not be like this with all guys, but since she already has a boyfriend, and then has you to think about too, that makes her a little uneasy about what she's feeling. don't go too far with trying to be with her while she's still with her guy. but stay close and make her know you do want a place in her life. xoxo helpachick

Q: whever i wear pajamas with tank tops it always looks weird cause i have no bra on and i feel uncomfortable looking like that. i found this reaaaaaaally cute pjs but i dont want to get them cause it has a tank top. how can i solve this problem? please dont says camis cause i cant find any cute cami pjs that i like.

hey whenever i'm like staying overnight somewhere, i just go ahead and wear a bra to bed under my tank top. because your right it does look kinda weird without one, so when your somewhere where ppl will see you in your pajamas, just go ahead and wear a bra. then when your just at home, it doesnt really matter because ppl arent going to see you and the ones that do (family) probably won't care. xoxo helpachick

Q: I'm looking for clothing companies that design clothes that have a sort of bohemian, retro-esque look similar to the clothes at Forever 21, Gadzooks, and 579. What are some other clothing companies and stores that sell that kind of clothing?

Thank you.

the first store that pops into my mind is Vanity. i'm not sure if you have one where you are, but it reminds me of gadzooks and forever 21 sooo much. also, sometimes Rue 21 and DEB might have things like that in their stores, too. xoxo helpachick

Q: Okay, I know this isn't really that important I guess, but one of my exboyfriends and I, well we broke up a year ago July 3rd, and He's still everything to me, he's the first guy I ever told I love you to, the one I was with the longest, and the one who made me feel like I was something, I had so much confidance in myself, and he never gave up on me.I still miss him so much, I broke up with him because we had our first fight, and he didnt speak to me after that until the 2nd semester of the school year. It feels like he's still there, but he's not. I miss him so much, and I've tried to get over him, but I just can't. is there any way that I can? Like suggestions or anything? I've had boyfriends since then, but For some reason, I always want to compare them to "HIM". and to me, they're not good enough... and I just can't move on... please help.

i dont really know what your fight was about, but maybe it's a thing where you two could work things out. it sounds like you were really close, and your right, feelings like that dont go away. i would try talking to him about everything, try to work it out, and you never know he may still like you to but maybe he figures you dont because you were the one who broke up with him. you should share your feelings with him once you two are like talking and have things worked out. he might feel the same. xoxo helpachick -i know how you feel-

Q: im supposed to think of 3 different types of songs for our 8th grade farewell dance (im on student council) and i need a "Rap/hip hop" song, a "slow" song and a "overall" song..by overall they mean how the year meant..and it was good and bad and i cannot think of ANY!

5s for anything.and i mean anything!

rap/hip hop: temprature by sean paul
slow song: last day of my life by phil vassar
overall: unwritten by natasha bedingfield

hope mite be good! xoxo helpachick

Q: Ok I'm a 13 year old girl and im about 5'3. I weigh probably around 110 pounds. I know this is not fat, but sometimes i really feel like i am. But it's not really my stomach that borhters me, its more my thighs. There just so, big. One of my best guy friends is having a hugee pool party in about 4 weeks and i really want to look good because there will be about 80 people from my grade (7th)((including the guy i like!)) and about 80 people from the 6th grade (not that i try to impress them..) Is there any weigh i can lose weight off only my thighs? I'll rate high for anyone that helps. I really need this! Thanks so so much!

run! running is one of the best things you can do for your legs. don't expect to see major changes like in a week, but if you go on a run everyday and press yourself that way, then you should see results soon. plus, it gets the rest of your body in pretty good shape, too. xoxo helpachick

Q: first of all, i want to apologize for having such a long problem.
second, i am 13/f

i have this guyfriend and i used to think he was my best friend because he just understands me unlike anyone else. i have this other friend, who has a similar name to mine, in most of my classes, people confuse us CONSTANTLY. i didn't really mind it until he did it because i thought he liked me more than her.

i got my friend to ask him who his best friend that was a girl was (not to make it obvious by asking him if he liked me or her better) and he said that SHE was his best friend that's a girl!

i was extremely upset because i've been through a lot in the last two months such as losing several good friends because of extremely unnecessary fights and i've just been very sensitive and not really listening to anyone. i thought that maybe he was the only person that i could truly count on. i've been REALLY hurt these past two months, and it's like i just added to that.

also, he is definitely not her best guyfriend. but we would always talk i am just so surprised that he said that i couldnt even explain the shock. we got in a fight a few months ago but we are currently (good?) friends. to tell you the truth, i dont like any of my friends. he was the only one that i actually had real friend qualities.

i've been so super bitchy to him this whole week because he is constantly flirting and talking with her but everyone knows that he is just extremely nice to everyone so i am not sure if it's flirting or not. should i...

a. forget about it and act like nothing ever happened (near impossible)
b. apologize for being a total bitchy freak and stay friends (which is gonna be really hard to do)
c. not forget because i got really hurt and not be mean, but not be really nice to him
d. keep my space with him and ONLY talk to him when completely necessary (which is what i'm doing... i guess)

you dont even understand... i am just so upset i seriously just want to die. (i'm using that to show you how upset i am but i dont know or think i'm suicidal)

thanks beyond much ♥

hey! i'll start by sayin that options c and d are probably not the answers you want to go with. of course, if i were you i wouldnt just be able to forget about it either; he hurt you! and since he's your friend, he needs to know that. if i were you, i would apologize for being bitchy to him, but your a girl and thats the way you get when your feelings get hurt by your really good friend. since you said he is just a really nice guy, maybe he told your other friend she was his best friend that's a girl because she was the one asking, and he didnt want to hurt her feelings by saying someone else's name. so tell him that he hurt you and try to work things out that way, and then keep on going and being friends like you were, because he was always there for you before, so he will be now too. this is really tough but you will pull through, believe me! xoxo helpachick

Q: i think i may have OCD. i've read up on it and i have all the symptoms. i especially struggle with "obsessions" as in i get one little thought stuck in my head and i think about it over and over for months.
i've tried doing everything i can about it, but to no avail. i spoke to my mum about it but she thinks its just worry and stress. she won't take it at all that i may have a mental illness. i really want to see a therapist or a doctor, but i'm only 17. my question is, could i see someone without my mum finding out? like i said, i can't talk to her about it. if not, what's something i can do to help myself until i turn 18 and can see a doctor myself? it's really starting to affect and has been persisting for over a year now. please help me. thank you

hey i think that you definitely need to see a doctor so: you need to find a way to make that happen. either try and go in there by yourself, and if you can't get one of your grandparents that could count as a 'guardian' to go in there with you to sign some papers. you don't have to tell them the real reason your going in, but you can if you want. then if you go in and you are diagnosed with OCD then your mom will have to find out but it will be ok with her that you went to the doctors afterall, because you found out something you needed to know. mom's don't always want to think of the worst that could be happening to their siblings, so they discard it from being true..thats what i think. but definitely find a way to go see a doctor. xoxo helpachick

Q: hey im 13/m and i was wonder for my girlfriend wut would make her really happy im taking to the movies and i ually pay fr everything cause i dont wnat her to waste her money i want her to use it for something eles....so wut can i do or give her?

hey! aw well that is really sweet that you pay for those things. but if you wanna make her happy other than just paying for the two of you's entertainment, the cuddly physical stuff always works. i don't know if your into it or ready for it, but just like holdind hands, and if you already do that and haven't kissed her yet, then kiss her if ya want! its bound to make her happy. and ya know just anything like that to..show affection. xoxo helpachick

Q: i have discharge everyday! it sucks i usually have to wear pantyliners..even when i dont have my period! the only time i dont have discharge is when i have my period (well obv.) but then it sucks because i always have to be wearing somethin like a panytliner because usually its alot of discharge! is there anything i can do? is it normal? will it ever stop?!

ahh i need helP!
i WILL rate 5 for anyone who helps
THANKS

yep welcome to being a girl. getting discharge, cramps, the whole enchilada even when your not on your period. it's totally normal to have discharge and it will most likely stop happening to often maybe once you get older. but it's alright. just keep doin what your doin and you should be fine! xoxo helpachick

Q: I know this may seem stupid. but i cannot stand freaking "popular" people. i have an advice collumn, and everyday i have a different message in my inbox from them like "stop being jelous of the popular people" or "why dont you wear preppy clothes and dress like everyone else? you'll never be popular if you do." and i sware im not jealous, and i wear all the same clothes they do. why do they think there the best? there really not that great. and i know im not a loser, so why do they call me one? they are all extremely mean, and full of themsleves. i dont want to be friends with them, but is there any way i can make them stop this? i really cant take it anymore and its really lowering my self esteem. pleaes i need help as soon as i can get it! thank you so so much!
love always.

oh bye the way if you are one of the popular people at your school, i'm really sorry im not being steriotypical and saying all popular poeple are like that. so please dont take thi the wrong way!

hey! have you ever noticed that the "popular" people, really aren't that popular with anyone but eachother? like you said, some of them are nice but some of them arent. i've learned that they aren't going away, so we'll just have to deal with them the best we can. keep being nice to them anyways and you might find that they are at least nice to you. you don't have to like be their friend or anything but if you're nice to them, they usually return the favor. if they don't its their loss because they are pretty stuck on themselves and don't realize that there are much better personality types out there than the ones they have. also you can always keep the hope that maybe you good personality and attitude towards everyone will maybe someday rub off to some of them. xoxo helpachick

Q: i just asked a question about the guy i like but know that i think about it i feel its weird for a mixed girl (black and white) to go out with a white guy. is it weird? im afraid what people would say or how they would look at me. it worries me. im afraid people would talk about me and him. im getting very uncomfortable. is this weird?

hey no i dont think this is weird at all! i've seen a lot of couples and known a few personaly and they make great couples. if people do say anything, it will be the jerky type people who are just jealous cause they can't get anybody. but most people arent really racist anymore. i think it doesnt really matter, its fine!!
xoxo helpachick

Q: How long does a period usally last?

usually they last five days to a week. it varies though. xoxo helpachick

Q: can i get pregnate from this? and he just came over 2 say sorry, so wat do i do?

ok so if i'm guessing right..are the the same girl who's question i answered yesterday about being raped? if so here's my answer.

well, if you have your period and are sure that he didnt use any protection, and you hadnt been on pills or anything, then yes there is a chance you could get pregnent... however this is where going to your parents and then the hospital right away is a good thing. they can help you and tell you if you are pregnant or not. and as for him coming over to "say he was sorry" well..ok it was good to say that but for doing something that big to you, just a simple sorry is not going to cut it. he is going to have to work really hard to even have a chance to regain even a little trust from you. if i were you i would stay away from him for sure, and not trust him as a friend or anything for at least a very very long time. and even if he did say he was sorry, you still need to tell the police because no matter if he is sorry or not, maybe he should have thought of that before he raped you. good luck with all of this. xoxo helpachick

Q: i have long brown hair and i was wondering what color should i get my highlights. would you suggest dark brown cuz thats what im leaning towards? if not what colors?

hey i have long brown hair too and if i got highlights i know that in my hair either a darker color of brown or maybe like an auburn color. and if you want something that really shows up then you could try a blonde or light brown. xoxo helpachick

Q: okay...i'm 13, and just lost my virginaty yesterday. actually, i'm not sure if i did or didn't. i was raped by my next door neighbor who is 16, and has a gf. also, my bf came to find me, and caught me being raped, but he thought that we were actually having sex. now he's mad and won't talk to me because i won't have sex with him. i really need help talking to him and everything. and should i tell my parents? or not? help!!!

omg yes tell your parents. they'll help you get in touch with police and you should go to the hospital to get tested and make sure everything is ok. as for your b/f. well put yourself in his shoes. seeing that would have been quite a blow especially since he thought you were doing something different. just call him or get him alone sometime and you should tell him the truth. he should trust that you are telling the truth. he might not know what to say at first, and maybe walk away. but in time he will most likely come back and comfort you, and you guys will be able to work things out. but omg i just wish you the best of luck in all this...i can only imagine how stressful and hard that would all be. xoxo helpachick

Q: Me and my friend need something to do.. I"m not sure how much money she has, and I'm low today, so I need something cheap. Any ideas? Please respond quick, I gotta call her soon.

5's for good advice!

hey! well one thing you can do is go to a mall or clothes store and both try to get together the craziest outfits by just picking stuff off the racks. it's cheap cause..you dont have to buy anything:P xoxo helpachick

Q: okay so limewire wont install on my computer. so.. what are otehr programs like it? thanks guys.

hey well i go to bearshare and it has always worked pretty good! xoxo helpachick

Q: how do you flatten your stomach out? im trying to eat better and doing lemon squeezes(if you know what they are) but its just not working. i have muscle at the top, but then a little above my belly button its all ..not musclely. lol uuh are there way to flatten it out by summer?

hey! well one way that always works no matter what is running! and if your a runner like me, then it's no problem. but also try doing crunches/sit ups. but yeah..running really works. xoxo helpachick

bio

hey im helpachick & i want to help you if i can. more than most of the questions i answer i have experienced something close to that myself. so feel free to ask&leave stuff in my inbox or whatever, and i'll try to get back soonish.

what about me?
I'm in college majoring in Fashion Textiles and Merchandising. I love fashion, boys, my friends, music, and love being active and outdoors. theres a lot more i could put about me but this is advicenators not myspace!!
ask away^.^