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Popularity
I know this may seem stupid. but i cannot stand freaking "popular" people. i have an advice collumn, and everyday i have a different message in my inbox from them like "stop being jelous of the popular people" or "why dont you wear preppy clothes and dress like everyone else? you'll never be popular if you do." and i sware im not jealous, and i wear all the same clothes they do. why do they think there the best? there really not that great. and i know im not a loser, so why do they call me one? they are all extremely mean, and full of themsleves. i dont want to be friends with them, but is there any way i can make them stop this? i really cant take it anymore and its really lowering my self esteem. pleaes i need help as soon as i can get it! thank you so so much!
love always.
oh bye the way if you are one of the popular people at your school, i'm really sorry im not being steriotypical and saying all popular poeple are like that. so please dont take thi the wrong way!
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Ok first of all thanks for adding that last bit because definatly not all popular people are like that. Ok this is my advice and by the way Im popular and not a B***h. But, I know how they can be.
Ok, many popular girls don't think of others as losers. The main problem is usually the Top Girl does and the others are afraid to stand up to her. For this type of clique "loser" is more a phrase saying you are not in our group and we don't want you in it. Its really really mean and please dont let it affect you. In many cases popularity is just luck. I see your trying to get them to stop by wearing the type of clothes they do but if you dont like them dont. There is a very slim chance their gonna be nicer cause of your clothes. If anything it's just another reason for them to think your a looser. (I know its complicated but here me out). Please dont let them lower your self esteem. The main girls in the popular clique love it and thats what your giving them satisfaction. One thing you kinda learn in girl world (or at least I learned this and a little last year) is never show weakness. They will back down if you never show them it's hurting you. Sometimes this is the exact quality which determines your popularity. I know this will also sound shallow but read this: Two years ago I came to a new school where popularity ruled. The first year I always got upset, I cried I gave them what they wanted. I was scared of them and hated them all. Then one day I decided to show them I dont care. They came up one day to bug me and instead of crying I shot it straight back at them. I got to know one of them and she was very very nice. With that working for me they learned to back off and after another year they all decided to look through my brains or my apperence and now im best friends with them all. Popular girls show a hard, evil apperence as if it was like a test, its like a defense wall. But many of them are the nicest people ever. And one last thing they might look very happy at schoool but many of their lives are depressing. Some people say how much theyd want to be popualr but really it is very hard, very stressful, and very annoying trying to stay popular. Other than them your life doesnt sound too bad. You dont need to impress anyone and you can live your life worry free. Please take some of my advice to heart.
Im not exactly sure how to answer your question for the question itself isnt clear but please please please if you have any more questions about these "popular" girls drop a question in my inbox ill answer it straight away!
Lots of Love
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well, those people who keep on telling you to act the same as the "popular" crowd just tell them that it's not your thing to look and act like everyone else. and when the popular people are like being really mean to you it just means that they're jealous of something you have that they don't. good luck! and have a great summer! bye
-.christina*
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Popularity is so overrated I honestly don't know why they even bother with it.
Just because you don't act like them & meet their "standards" does not mean your a loser. So, don't let them get your self-esteem down. Half of the popular people i know aren't even HAPPY, believe it or not. How sad is that? They put on this big front and then they're not even happy with their lives! All i can tell you is to live your life so your HAPPY. Happiness is always the best way. It's sad, though, if you think about it.. some of them spend a tremendous amount of time putting others down only to make themselves feel better.
God Bless,
Nikki.
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I know how you feel. I am not a fond of popular people either. I am not against them. I have many friends who are popular and wear preppy clothes. I don't get into it but I always try to find some common ground with them. You are who you are. Nobody else can change that but yourself. Don't care about what others people think. You're unique and you don't need a reason why you don't like popular people - you just simply don't get into their style and reputation.
If they won't understand how you feel then they're being jerks. Just ignore them and prove to them you're way better than that. Don't waste your time getting back at them.
Besides, uniqueness and difference is better than trying to be like everyone else.
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Hey, i'm not one of the popular people and i know what you mean, because they're 'popular' (popular people usually arent really popular, usually everyone knows who they are, but the 'unpopular' people have just as much, or more friends than them) they get big headed and think they're better than everyone else. Its like with celebs, cos everyone knows who they are they start to get big headed and try to take advantage of people just because of that.
They think that they can get away with more because no one is going to stand up to them.
I think the only way to stop then from doing this to you is to stand up to them, if they do something you dont like then say something. The key is to bring them down to earth, to show them that they're not better than everyone else.
If one of them ever comes up to you and says something like "I got this really cool new top, it was really expensive' in a sort of bragging way, then simply say 'cool' and carry on with what you were doing. If you ignore them then they'll think you're jealous, but if you make a big deal out of it it will make them big headed. So just saying 'cool' is the best.
If you sit next to them in class, talk to them about things like the how hard the work is. You're not gonna become friends with them by doing this, which is good because i know you dont want to be friends with them, but they will realise that you're equal to them (again. being casual with them is the best, cos you wont make them more big headed or sound jealous) and they will probably stop it.
Hope i helped,
*+*TropicalBabe*+* &hearts
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Once you get inside a few popular people's lives, you realize things aren't always that great. They're pretty much like everyone else.
I was never popular in school, but around 9th grade, I saw a HUGE change in how people acted compared to 7th grade. People seem to eventually get over their immature years. While there will still be popular people, they'll be less prone to single you out.
Although I was verbally picked on more than almost anyone I know in 7th grade, I worked through it, and now I'm well known and liked by my school, but I don't hang with the popular groups outside of school, or even that much in school.
People will change. Just be happy and nice. If you're outgoing, people will like you. Also, give it a few more years. 11th and 12th grade were when even the total assholes (with an exception of those few who will never change) changed their ways.
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hey! have you ever noticed that the "popular" people, really aren't that popular with anyone but eachother? like you said, some of them are nice but some of them arent. i've learned that they aren't going away, so we'll just have to deal with them the best we can. keep being nice to them anyways and you might find that they are at least nice to you. you don't have to like be their friend or anything but if you're nice to them, they usually return the favor. if they don't its their loss because they are pretty stuck on themselves and don't realize that there are much better personality types out there than the ones they have. also you can always keep the hope that maybe you good personality and attitude towards everyone will maybe someday rub off to some of them. xoxo helpachick
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I know what you mean about that. In my school we have groups like popular people, goths/punks, smart people.. you get the idea. Anyways, I'm best friends with the "popular" people and I've been hanging out with them since a looong time but I don't consider myself popular. I don't even consider my friends popular. People's appearance effects their spot in school and who they are. Just because they wear certain clothes doesn't mean they own the school. Anyways, their idea or them being popular is all wrong. Popular people are supposed to be nice and everyone knows them and likes them.. not stupid bitches. They are saying that stuff to you because they want you to be like everyone else. They want you to be like them and don't ever do that. I know you're not jelous, you know you're not and so do your friends, so if you don't really like these people and you don't care about them, why are you letting their stupid opinions get to you? It's really good that you're not like them. I'm sick of people wearing the same stuff and acting the same. They need to be a little more original and themselves. They think they're the best because they made people belive they are. People let them boss them around, say mean stuff and just don't let them get to you. Stand up for yourself and don't let them talk crap to you. You're not a loser. They are actually the losers. Every one of them is probablly the same and it's kind of pathetic but still, everyone is different. You can't really make them stop so just ignore them. Who cares about what they say? You shouldn't. You know they're wrong and their opinion shouldn't matter. My attitude used to be like those "popular" people, but it's hard to explain why they're like that. Not all popular people are mean but I know you didn't want to offend anyone. Good luck. :]
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we are siblings i feel the same way all i can say is dont beleive them what they say doesnt make you you make you so if they say wear this or you should do this ignore them because they are the ones who will be working at mcdonalds or burgerking in their 'stylish' outfits from hollister and american eagle you are what you are and only you can change that if you start taking the things they say into mind it will ruin you and life would be a downpour of rain all the time so be proud that you are a walmart shopper (that doesnt mean you are im just saying be proud if you are) and take life by the horns your only alive once you know hope i helped ya
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theyre just retarded and full of themselves, but trust me i know where you're coming from. when i first moved to a different school in 6th grade people used to make fun of how i dress (now that i think back on it i did dress like a freak...but it shouldnt be a target for judging me) and shit like that. i was really shy so i didnt do anything but now im a lot more brave than i was, and have friends. you just have to tell them off, or ignore them, but i personally would rather tell them off. some people will say "its because they have low self esteem so theyre trying to make themselves feel better by lowering you" which can be true. like, 5% of the time. most of the time theyre just assholes and feel like messing with someone. basically i would say to stand up for yourself, and dont listen to what they say. obviously you dont like assholes, so, you shouldnt care what an asshole thinks.
easier said than done, i know.
but try it out.
and give em hell.
;)
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Just stand up to them. They are probably just doing it becuase their "popular" and they think that they can do anything. Who cares what they say. Their not your friends just ignore them. LIfe isnt aout being "popular", if you have great friends and like yourself that all that matters.
xoxJess
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