hey. my name is christina benavente. and i am 13 years old. i am so good at giving people advice. if you have any questions about anything just ask me! hope you ask all the questions in the world! bye!
Website: Just ask.
E-mail: christina_benavente_78@hotmail.com
Gender: Female
Location: Guam
Occupation: Student
Age: 13
MSN: christina_benavente_78@hotmail.com
Member Since: April 24, 2006
Answers: 45
Last Update: July 27, 2006
Visitors: 4037
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Okay, so I really really like this boy James. But he hates me. For no reason! Omg. Hes so sweet/cute/fine and I really like him. People try to convince me he likes me but I just know he doesn't. I know this sounds dumb and all but I started cutting myself just because I think my life was horrible [in my opinion] and now this to make it worse! I cant stand It but i like him so much. I want to stop cutting SO bad because its really not the right thing! Please help me with suggestions to stop! I really dont wanna ruin my life by a stupid mistake I made.
Sincerely,
Bloody Wrists. (link)
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okae. you really don't know what your doing to your body. because with one cut you can end your life just like that. you shouldn't hurt your body for some guy. it is so not worth it! so just stop cutting yourself and move on with your life. it'll make your life better if you stop cutting. i mean you don't have to stop liking the guy but you gotta stop what your doing. you know what i'm saying? okaie i hope i helped. enjoy the rest of the summer
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ok soo me and my boyfriend have been together for a while and he thinks im to jealuos
-i hate this girl he use to like
-i hate that he whatches porn
-talks to other girls thats are sooo stuck up and snoby and thinks there hot errr!!
-talks about girls but jokingly he says!!
-stares at girls and then when i ask him what are you looking at hes all like umm i just thought i knew her!!
this stufff tottally drives me crazy i hate it do you think im to jealous and what should i do about it and do guys not like it when girls act jealous!! (link)
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1. don't let the girl he used to like. if he still liked her he would've still liked her instead of you. so don't worry
2. haha. porn. don't be worried about that. he just watches that to pleasure himself
3. tell him that you're not comfortable that he's talking to girls that are so stuck up and snobby [as you say they are] and that he thinks they're hot.
4. same as number 3.
and i don't think your jealous. it's just something all girls have in their system..well hope i helped! enjoy your summer
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I met my best guy friend 3 years ago (lets call him mark)...we were friends for about two months before we started acting like a couple but we'rent going out. About a year later we were nothing but friends and a new friend of mine (lets call her aly) needed a bf. So I introduced them. Aly went out with Mark on and off for about 5 months...they have been broken uhp for 6th months now and me and aly have been best friends for a year. Me and mark have recently (2 months ago) had feelings for each other again. I went to the movies with him yesterday and I relized that I had fallen completely in love with him. I dont want to hurt aly but is it ohkay for me to date mark eventually? what should I tell aly so she can accept it. Ive know mark for at lesast a year longer than aly...and I used have a realtionship like theirs before. what should I do??? i'll rate high (link)
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well..if you wanna be a good friend you should ask aly if she feels uncomfortable of you too dating. but if you really like this guy then i'll admit that you should go out with him. hope i helped! and good luck
.christina*
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well im 13/f. i used to hang out with this group of 5 girls. but then 4 out of the five started ignoring me slowly but surely. the other girl stayed with me and got ignored too. the girl and i decided that we would not talk to them as much. then we gave them antoher chance and became "friends" again with the other 4. that happened again 2 more times. so then it was happening again so we decided to make new friends and not talk to the 4 girls forever. it was going as planned. we made new friends and had fun. but then the 4 girls called and said sorry and asked for another chance last night. so seeing that we all knwon each other since we were 3 we missed the 4 girls, so we gave in. our parents knew about this whole thing. so today instead of sitting with our new friends we sat with the 4 girls for lunch. the friend that stuck with mes mom found out. now the girl is forbidden to sit with them and hang out with them. because he mom doesnt want her daughter to hang out with people who ignore her. also one of the 4 girls from the group is labelled as a slut. so the girl who stuck with mes mom doesnt want her daughter to be that. now the new friends we made are mad at us, because we basically didnt talk to thjem at all today. so my mom doesnt really care and is letting me make me own decisions. so now i want to talk to the 4 girls, my friend who stuck with me, and the new friends. i cant talk to all of them. also about sitting with them at lunch. i cant just ditch my friend who stuck with me. but i really want to sit with the 4 girls. my friend either sits by herself or with the new friends(if they forgive her). what should i do? i need help ASAP! (link)
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well the girl who stuck with you is such a good friend! she's what i call a true blue friend. and those girls who ditched you guys, they're not worth it! you should never ditch somebody who has been such a true friend. and i advice that you shouldn't ditch any of them. just make time to spend with both groups (if your new friends forgive you). and about the party, it's not our decision for you to go or not but it's yours. but if i were in your situation i wouldn't go and leave my friend for some party the person that ditched me is having. good luck..hope everything works out! bye!
.christina*
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i've been friends with my best friend thats a guy, since i was in intermediate school..and all of this year we'd always talk and flirt and all that stuff well a week ago he stopped talking to me..and i had no idea why, his friend had told me that he told him that he hated me bc of all the crap ive done to him this year. my best friend well old best friend wont even talk to him about it but i dont know what i did, how do i get him to talk to me about it bc i dont want to lose him as a friend (link)
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well you should like just get him to talk to you in private..or like call him or talk to him online and ask him what you did to make him hate you. tell me all about what happens!bye!
.christina*
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Alright, Im going to preface this by saying, Im not your average asshole guy who thinks the world loves him, so temper your responses as if youre talking to someone who is reasonable and who approaches things with a relatively open mind.
So, Im in this relationship. One in a long line of similar ones, I have a tendancy to get into the serious kind, and my girlfriends tend to stick around for the better side of a year. My current and I are just about at the 18 month mark.
We have hit this point where I am comfy. I like talking to her, and having her around, and doing the cute little couple things,but I also like my space, and try to communicate that to her in a non hostile or not "get off my back" toned way. I try to just let her know gently when I need to just chill out and not be sitting on the couch with her in my lap.
But she, on the other hand, just cant seem to get enough. She wants me to hold her from the second I get home until the second I leave for work the next day, and generally suffocates me.
Now, Im pointing out what she does, but this behaviour has led to EVERY SINGLE BREAK UP Ive had in the last 8 years. 6 ltrs and a few month - 2 month beginnings. Girls hit this point where they want you around them 24/7, and excuse me if I like my partners to be _part_ of my life and not the entire focus of it.
So as I said, Im not an uncaring person. I cuddle after sex, I like laying together and watching a movie, I give her a massage nearly every night, but I dont want to be wrapped around ANYONE every second that Im not at work. I hate my job, and at times I enjoy going to get a respite from her. Its fucking ridiculous!
So, what the hell should I do? I mean, Im not going to say theres something wrong with me. Hell, I would say that Im more affectionate on a regular basis than the average guy I know, but I like a few hours a day to sit at the computer and play games, or to take a hot shower _alone_ or maybe, just maybe, fall asleep in a position thats comfortable to me, not that makes her feel like my teddy bear.
I cant figure it out. Are all girls like this? Or do I just have some wierd attraction to girls who do this and havent figured it out? I dont know. But its the reason I keep having to end relationships, and I like this girl, I dont want to break up with her because shes suffocating me.
Angry women responding saying Im a pig, or that I dont deserve her, or anything else of an un-thought out and abrasive nature will get a one and an angry riposte. (link)
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well..since i'm a girl i would tell you that not all girls are like that. it's only some girls that are like that. but here's what you should say to her. just be like "why don't you have a night out with the girls and i'll have a night out with the boys?". but if that doesn't work just tell her straight but in a gentle and nice voice that you need your space and that you don't want to be attached to her. hope i helped. bye
.christina*
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PLEASE READ. need adive now. =DD
background info:13.f -- alright so i have a really good best friend who ive known since kindergarten. (amanda) she considers all the people who sit at our lunch table to be her 'best friends'. but they're all quite annoyed by her. We had a chat about her, and she never gets invited anywhere, and while i admit that i was part of those things -- i hated it. so my other best friend was having a 'party' this weekend, and amanda figured, "oh ill be invited," and when she wasnt she asked me if my other best friend still liked her.
& what was i supposed to do? If someone didnt like me id want to know. so, i told her. and she got really upset and started to cry. and she decided to corner my other best friend and ask about everything. I asked her to say i hadn't told her -- but she did.
So my other best friend did what she always does, and denied everything, the chat, parties, behind back talking -- everything. And amanda being who she is, forgave her without even an explanation.
I got back from school that day and signed online and my other best friend was reall p/oed. she kept yelling, 'ew' at me. and saying things like, 'you screwed yourself over more than you did me' and then stated she didnt want to be my friend anymore. So tell, me -- how am i screwing her over by telling someone SHE DOESNT LIKE, thats she doesnt like her?
Being in seventh grade, theres drama. its funny how many people hate my other best friend. You love her or you hate her.and up till this point, id pretty much been her follower. and then she jujst makes everything more confusing by putting amanda on her away message. why would she do that if she hates her? trust me, she hates her.
and during the im conversation, i said i was sorry a million times. because i hate getting into fights especially with this one friend. she freaked out even more. and was being quite a bitch. so of course, things work out really crappy. shes not mad at amanda, but now she says im not even her friend. i didnt go to lunch yesterday becuase i had no place to sit, so i stood out by my locker the whole time. Its almost my birthday and it'd be a sucky present to lose who ive considered one of my best friends.
Help? adive -- opinions? please. ill rate 5s for any help if you bothered reading this thing. xx (link)
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well..i can actually relate to this problem because i'm in 7th grade and it's happened to me..so many times. it's ok that you told amanda that your best friend doesn't like her. it's not your fault that your best friend isn't your friend anymore. it wasn't right for your best friend to lie to her. and it wasn't right for amanda to tell your best friend that you told her when you asked her to tell her. just give them some space and things will just go back to normal. or just try talking to amanda or your other best friend about it. hope i helped! bye!
.christina*
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whats leading them on means? is that also means a player?
im from jamaica (link)
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well when you lead someone on it means like you say something to make them like you. and it's so not being a player. being a player means that you're going out with someone and then you check out someone else. they're 2 totally different things.
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thers this guy, who i kinda kind get my eye off of, well i want to hang out with him soooo bad, but i just dont know where to go or how to ask him, and just make it normal? if it helps im a 14/f and hanging out at my place of his is not an option. and im from Salem...so ya any ideas help... thanx
-Me (link)
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just ask him out casually like "hey (name of him) i was wondering if you didn't have any plans this friday (or whatever day you choose) if we could hang out at (where you wanna hang out)?" and then it's just his answer. but before you ask him you have to build up enough courage to ask him first. hope i helped! bye!
.christina*
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omg i am sooo fucking pissed off at my friend. she won't stop talking about my boyfriend and it's really starting to get me pissed off. Cause she even admitted to still liking him since they went out like during the summer but all i hear from her is what they did the first day they went out and how good of a kisser he is. what should i do i don't want her to get mad at me??!!!! (link)
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she probably misses him thats all.
but don't worry. that happened to me and my friend once. she used to go out with my boyfriend and she couldnt' stop talking about him. why don't you just tell her to like please stop talking about him and that it's getting annoying. but tell it to her in a nicer and gentler way. hope it all goes well! have a great summer! bye
.christina*
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Whats the best way to get over my shyness and ask this girl I like out? How can I make it easier on myself? She plays hard to get. (link)
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well..just do the same thing back to her. just act smooth. it might not be the easiest thing to do but it'll work. trust me on this. i'm a girl ok? and it seriously works. all the guys i know i play hard to get they play it back and we end up dating. just play it back. thats all i'm saying. tell me how it goes! have a nice summer! bye!
.christina*
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theres this brother of one of the girls on my sisters soccer team and i saw him at the begining of the game and i got a feeling like "wow i want to talk to him and meet him" but because im so shy i didnt talk to him. he kinda saw me at the begining too (i think) but he was with his dad and went down to sit with him, but like after the game too the team was having their like "after game meeting" and he was looking like in my direction im not sure if he was really looking at me if you know what i mean. i dont know what to think what if wasnt looking at me i would feel like an idiot if i just went and talked to him and he had no intrest in talking to me at all. i really want to talk to him but i dont know how to not make it awkward. i know nothing about him other than his sister is on the team. what do i do!!!??
p.s. they have a game tonight and i think i might go to see if maybe hes there and maybe if i can get over being shy i might be able to talk to him? please help me do this!?
(link)
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just talk to him. he's just a guy. don't be afraid. it's ok to be shy, but like think of something that makes you laugh and put it on him. or picture something that you really like and put it in his place and just start talking. it'll all be fine. it's kinda like going on stage where you have stage fright and then someone tells you to JUST BREATHE! thats all you have to do. just breathe. hope everything turns out great! tell me all about it! bye! have a great summer!
.christina*
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The girl with loads of confidence seem to have it all. All the gilrs want to be "her" and all the guys want to date her. The girl that gets good grades and a varsity ahlete. My question is how does she reach the level of complete control over her own life-the confidence-likeable personality.Where does it all come from? my goal is to become her but a better version "me" without being completely fake. it woul dmean the worl to me if I had advicenators to help me out. THANKS YOU! (link)
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well..i think the why she's like that is because she has self-confidence. thats how a person has everyone wanting to be her and all the guys wanting to date her. i'm not saying to act like her all i'm saying is to have confidence in yourself. just act like you're with someone who is very close to you. in other words be yourself. hope i helped! bye! have a great summer!
.christina*
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Ok. so here's the deal..... My boyfriend broke up with me about a week ago on the last day of school. I think the reason why was because I was kinda being a jerk that day because my mom made me REALLY mad the night before. Well anyway.... I WANT HIM BACK! He was the sweetest guy that I had ever met. He might have thrown some little fits here and there since he's used to getting his way, but most of the time he was very affectionate. His birthday is coming up in a couple of days and I want to ask him back out as a present. The only thing is, I'm not sure if he'll take me back and how I'm gonna ask him. Any suggestions? (link)
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well..you should explain to him what happened and why you were being a jerk. then apologize. if he forgives you don't ask him out right away. cause that might freak him out and make him think you just said all of that to make him take you back. just like hang out with him go to a movie or whatever like shopping and all, and then when the times right ask him out. hope everything turns out great and have a good summer! bye
.christina*
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ok so, my school is having a dinner dance. my best friend and i were going to ask the ppl we like to it today after school. BUT these to guys, who we are kinda friends with and like us, asked us to the dance. but when she went on the bus today, she asked the 2 guys that we like, what they would say if we asked them. they said they would have said yes!!!!! what the hell should we do? we are in need of some serious advice!!!! thanks
(link)
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well you should go out with the people who asked you to the dance. i mean who knows? maybe you and them could become closer. and then after that you can go somewhere with the guys you like. or it could be the other way around. good luck! and have fun at the dance! bye
.christina*
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okay well im really sick of not being popular. i have a couple of friends, but sometimes they just get sick of being with me. today in school we were reading reports to the class. the person who read their report got to choose another person to go next. NO ONE PICKED ME! my "friends" chose their other friends and then the nerds even got chosen before me. finally, this girl that no one likes picked me and everyone was laughing at me because i was the last one to read my report. i just want to be popular. now i DEFINITELY don't want to be the most popular girl in the school, but i just want some really nice friends who would take a bullet for me. i'm sick of going home every day crying, because no one ever talks to me or saves a seat for me. everyone has their own groups (clicks) and im not in any of them so im just the odd one out. even my best friends have a click and they won't let me in it. i just feel like i'm in the middle of everyone. and its not like im shy because i talk a lot and stuff, but i guess im still too boring for everyone. no one even trusts me with their secrets (including the 6 friends i have.) and i don't tell secrets and my friends know that but if they have a secret to tell eachother, they'll make me leave and then i can hear them laughing and stuff. and no one even tells me who's going out with who!! my closest friend had been dating a boy for 3 days and she didn't even tell me and i felt like a loser when everyone knew it and i was just finding out. i feel like im left out of everything, and alot of people pretend to like me and they'll hang out with me once in a while, but then they start their own clicks again and i can't get in any of them. And in AIM profiles when everyone lists their friends, I'm always close to last even if I know that person really well. I feel like I'm just not as "likeable" to people and they think everyone else is funnier and more fun than me. And I'm not mean to everyone and I'm never boring, but I just feel like I'm treated like a piece of crap. One second someone will want to hang out with me and the next second they're friends with someone else. So many people say I'm their "best friend" and I'm so "nice" but they don't want to hang out with me. I just don't get it. I don't know what to do. How can I be more "likeable" to people so people will want to hang out with me and be better friends with me? How can I make A LOT of friends? I've tried everything but I just can't get in to anyone's click. How can I do this? Please don't make me feel worse then I already do. I just want to die.
Thanks, I will deffinitely rate. (link)
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well. this is what it's gonna be like that in highschool. so i suggest that you join some clubs like yearbook committee, newspaper, the glee club or whatever. it's an easy way to make friends. and then when you make friends you can join all those clicks. to make people like you for you just be yourself. just act the way you do when you're with your family. it's very simple. well hope it works out. and have a great summer! bye!
.christina*
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what is desperate means? and is that bad? cause people say im desperate and i dont know what that means
im from japan. (link)
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well desperate isn't a good thing and it isn't a bad thing. but the desperate meaning i know is that you're willing to go out with anyone!
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16/f I think that I have a crush on my best friend. I've been really good friends with him for about 5 years now, but a couple of weeks ago we went to prom together and a little lightbulb went off in my head. Now I can't stop thinking about him, dreaming about him, wishing that he were more than just my best friend. He's going off to college soon, but I really really want something to happen before he leaves. Any ideas on how to get my best friend to like me back? I don't think that he has any idea that my feelings for him have changed, and I'm afraid that I'd freak him out if I just told him the strait truth. (link)
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well even if you freak him out by telling him that you have feelings for him just remember that he's your best friend. but since he's going to college i suggest you tell him before it's too late. who knows? maybe he has the same feelings for you but is just too scared that you might not like him the same way. just think about it. maybe my advice is the right thing for you. good luck. and have a great summer! bye
-.christina*
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15/f
when i was like 12, i would spend all the time that i could with my mom. i would actually hang up on some other friends on the phone to hang out with her. when i turned about 14, my mother maybe thought that i favored my friends over her (not true) but w/e. she probably just thought it was weird i wanted to go out with them and not want myself to be seen in the mall w/ her and stuff. but you know, that was normal like a year-two years ago. but she believed after that that there was only one way to get to a teenager. it was to talk to her/him in like foul language and get into AIM and myspace and all that. i guess its kind of cool my mom likes myspace, but not to the extreme she takes it. she goes on there at 6:00 in the morning to check if i have any comments. i never get to see when i have new comments and stuff because she looks at them first. she even responds to them! i think that is crazy and is insane and i don't know what else, but she can't just talk for me on myspace! its just wrong! i'm not saying it for any reason other than i like MY words to come out of MY mouth and not anybody else's. that really isn't the only way that she can through to me, and she KNOWS that i like her better than my friends because i don't really have any friends, well girl-friends that is. i only have one. the rest of my friends are guys, because i just get along better with them because i'm not in competition with them and we don't get jealous of each other and stuff. so, really, why does she get this way? i don't want to get into fights with her anymore..... does anyone have any words of wisdom that can help me here? thank you in advance
(link)
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well i suggest that you either get a new myspace/aol/aim or change your password and odn't let her know what it is. and then if you can make your own account on your computer. i think that the reason your mom is doing this is because she feels that you and her are seperating as mother and daughter. maybe she feels that you're embarrassed to be seen with her is because thats normal for a teenage girl to go through. i bet that your mom just wants to get closer to you to spend a little more time with you. maybe for you to tell her that you love her once in a while. thats all i ahve to say..good luck and have an awesome summer! bye
-.christina*
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Okay this is going to be REALLY long, this all started when i was doing my clothes at around 11.... i wanted to clean some of my clothes so i would have something to wear tomorrow.
so i threw 2 pairs of abercrombie pants in the wash and dryer. so my mom was all like throw some of my jeans in! but i was half way threw the cycle to put any thing else in the the wash so i didnt bother.
then we went out and i was all nice to her. very nice. this lasted till about 3?
then i got home around like 3:30, and wow was it hell. i put my jeans in the dryer. so they would be dry for about 4:00. then my mom threw in some of her stuff, so i threw in the whites that were dirty in too. no problem with that right?
Okay this is when the shit started, i threw her stuff in the dryer without looking. [with my whites....] and so i did that so i could wash my so lows. so i did that. no problem right?
okay so my mom SCREAMS AND YELLS. becuase her stuff apparently shrunk 2 sizes. i told her if she wants to fit into them again, [ps their like designer] so she starts a hussy-fit with how everything gets broken left and right. and i dont need this beause i have finals from the 13-20th. do i need peace and quiet. but Apparently i cant get it sence my mom is bitching [sorry but i dont have anything else to say for that]
and i didnt invite her to dinner because i dont allow whiners eat the food i make, [im like a chef and planning to be one] so i made pretty good food. its hard to resist ;]
but like, then i was eating then she said to my dad, ricky, sister, melissa, and i, laura, "i hope you bastards [im quoting the EXACT words] fucking die form that taco shit you call food, and i hope you CHOKE AND DIE"
what should i do? call the cops. HELP! (link)
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no you shouldn't call the cops just cause your mom is cussing out you guys. i mean you should only call the cops if your mother is physically abusing you. not emotionally abusing you. maybe your mom is doing this stuff because she's under alot of stress from work or something. see your mom is just like my mom. all you hav to do is give her some space. maybe do something for her. like buy her flowers or something. or maybe just apologize for accidentally shrinking her clothes 2 sizes down even though it wasn't your fault. hope you 2 find peace with eachother and good luck. have a great and fantastic summer! bye
-.christina*
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