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If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal.

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Laura/22/England

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my boyfriend wants to have sex but i dont know if im ready what should i tell him

What you should say is already in your question.
"I'm not ready to have sex with you yet."
He should understand and wait until you are 100% ready. Don't just do it because he wants to. It's not worth it.

ok so me and my friend are in 8th grade
tonight me her her boyfriend and my boyfriend were supposed to go to the movies for a double date.
well usually she doesnt go out with guys and she had just became this guys girfriend and i was like i bet shes gonna stand him up and me my boyfreind and my friends boyfreind went to the movies tonight and she wasnt there and i felt so sorry for her boyfriend but she always does this
WHAT SHOULD I DO!!!!!

That's pretty harsh.
You shouldn't agree to double date with her.
Talk to her.. she's hurting people by doing this. She could at least have the decency to say she can't go in the first place.. or at least phone her boyfriend telling him she can't make it for whatever reason and apologize.

Hey everyone Im a 15 year old girl in highschool and I need some advice. My used to be best friend recently started getting drunk about a month into our freshman year. At first she started talking about it and I got really mad at her for even thinking about it. I made her promise not to go drinking and promised me she wouldn't. Then I here on homecomming that she drank before the dance with some of my other friends but I just assumed that she was acting crazy at the dance, not actually drunk. I had to hear from SOMEONE ELSE that she drank. So indtead of confronting her I gave her a complete silent treatment for 3 weeks. She finally wrote me a note saying how she was sorry how she messed up our friendship, how we used to be best friends, how shes an idiot, how shell never drink again and stuff like that. I decided to forgive her a few days later. So time went on and we were cool, but then like 4 days ago i found out she FOR SURE was drinking over the weekend. Then today I found out shes planning to go get drunk this weekend. Ive stopped talking to her since i found out she drank last weekend. Am I doing something wrong? How do I handle this? Do i talk to her? I care about her soooooo much. she also has a problem with being taken advantage of by boys. Her mom has cancer, her dads an ex meth user. She keeps trying to work things out with me but I always brush her off. Sometimes im pretty nasty w/ her. Theres more sides to the story, but i think im running out of room so i'll stop. Thanks for taking the time to read this...

BHKchick

You giving her the silent treatment isn't going to help this situation - it's just going to put more worry on her shoulders, because from what you've said about her mum and dad etc, she must be dealing with some pretty hard issues at the moment.. even if she doesn't show it on the outside.
I know you care about her, you even said yourself, so that's a good enough reason to stick around and help her through it, right?
There could be a number of reasons for her drinking.
It could just be a phase where she wants to act big - which shouldn't be too much of a problem because within a bit of time, she'll probably get bored of it. and lets face it, most rebellious teens go through a phase like this.
Or,
it could actually be the beginning of a serious problem.
It depends how much she's drinking at the moment - and what she's drinking, too.
If I were in your position, I'd talk to her. Ask her why she does it. Help her stop.
Do the decent thing a best friend would and help. I know you don't appreciate her drinking and don't want to see anything bad happen to her, but that's what best friends are for - to stick around and help each other with their problems.

how do you give someone a handjob

Sorry.. It's against the rules of Advicenators to go into details on how to do sexual acts.

You'll find out how here.
Good luck.

I'm getting my tongue pierced. My dad can't know so I'm going to wear a clear barbell. I'm doing it on Sat. during the day coming home around 11 saturday night.. do you think by my talking it will be really noticeable like because my tongue will be swollen? & how bad does it hurt?

Your speech will be different.. it'll probably be like it for a few days. So if you don't want him to notice, it's best not to talk alot around him. Remember you won't be able to eat solid foods.. so make sure you have plenty other things you can eat - and ice/ice cream to help with pain and swelling. How much it hurts also depends on the person. I know alot of people with it done. For some, it was no big deal, whereas other thought it hurt quite a bit.
If you want something though, don't let the pain put you off! :)

It is bad to like my boss? He is 7 years older than me but i don't act my age, i act more his age. He has a girlfriend so nothing would ever happen but i still like him. Does that make me wrong?

Thanks

16/f

It's okay to have a crush on him. You can't help that.
Just make sure you know nothing can come of it - but I guess you already know that.
Don't worry about it. I'm sure plenty of teenage girls have been in your position - like having a crush on a teacher as another example.
It doesn't in any way make you "wrong" :)

I love having sex with my partner but when i reach the point of orgasam i tense up and can not enjoy it is there anything i can do to help me not tense up every time?

I think you're putting too much pressure on yourself to enjoy it. Don't think about it. Don't try to make yourself not tense up.. because that won't happen. You'll make it worse.
If you feel yourself tensing up, stop for a few seconds, then continue. If you ignore what you're body's doing (tensing) and just carry on trying to make it happen, it won't - and it won't really be as enjoyable as it could be. Stopping for a few seconds will help you to relax. Relaxing is a key part to having an orgasm.
Just focus on the feelings at the time and enjoy them. and when the time comes, don't hold back.
With a bit of practice on enjoying the sensations at the time and not worrying about achieving an orgasm later on, it'll get better.
and remember;
"no one has an orgasm by trying to have one"
Practice makes perfect.

okey does age really matter ...dang im kinda sorta dating a guy 4 years older than me .i feel so lucky to b wit him .he understands me and everything i do .but everyone says that age does matter ......age is just a number right......i hope i really do like him and im falling madly in love ........help does it really matter .......but is it rape

How old are you?
If you're underage and engaging in sexual activities with him, yes it does matter. He can get into a lot of trouble if for it.

"The implication of the rule is that anyone who has sex with a girl under 13 is committing what is termed "statutory rape". There is no defense to this charge - even if a boy says the girl was willing or that he thought she was older than she was, it would not matter.
If she is 13-15, the boy could go to prison for two years.
If she is under 13 he could be sentenced to life imprisonment."

Age is just a number.. but when sex is involved, it's a different story.

I got a boyfriend and me and him been going together for like 9months going on 10. AND now me and him just been going off on each other.Because of people keep hating on us. And we is like a mate. and when we around each other we hella cool.and just go everwhere.But when we here something that a person said .We just go off. what do you think i should do.

What do you do? You don't let whatever ANYONE says affect you.
Don't listen to them.
Don't believe them.
Don't let them come between you.
Don't let them win.
Focus on yourselves.. not the idiots around you saying things.
You shouldn't care what anyone else says or thinks about you anyway.

okay so i am gay but my mum and no-one else knows how should i come out to my mum as i am worried if i tell her she may hate me

Firstly, your mum will not hate you. She may be a little shocked at first - maybe even disappointed - but within time, she will come round to the idea and be happy that you are happy.
Honesty is the best policy. Sit her down and say you need to tell her something which may surprise her, but you want to her to love you no matter what. If you don't really have a close relationship with your mum where you feel comfortable sitting her down and telling her straight, you could write her a letter.
You know, you shouldn't be in such a rush to tell her if you aren't ready.. You should do it in your own time.

If i skip a period, does that mean im pregnant?

No. You can miss periods for a number of reasons (stress, change in diet, side effect from medication etc). If you miss more than 3 cycles and you KNOW you aren't pregnant, see your doctor.
Have you taken a pregnancy test? Because I'm guessing you're sexually active.. otherwise you wouldn't be worrying about being pregnant.

i vomitted this passed sunday just once when i got out of the shower and i'm not too sure why and every since then i've had abdominal cramps. when i did vomit i was really dizzy and had a really bad stomach ache. can anyone tell me what might be going on? (because i have no idea)and when it might go away?

It's impossible to say. Noone here can give you a proper diagnosis apart from a doctor.. and as far as I'm aware, there aren't any doctors here.
You can Google your symptoms.
By the way, if you don't seem to be getting better after 3 days, you probably need medication. So it's wise to get checked out to put your mind at ease.

i just got my braces off and a lot of people said that i look really pretty without them, and i get a lot of compliments now. does getting your bracees off really change that much about you or how you look? guys have started to notice me a lot more too. i even have a boyfriend now

It's probably more the fact you look a little different since having metal in your mouth for a few years ;)
I doubt getting your braces off made you get a boyfriend. I mean, they're not very off putting or even that noticeable - and having them is no reason for guys not to like you.
You should be happy for the compliments you receive. :)

my heater plug light and ems light keep coming on

and..
Do you need to stop it coming on?
To get the help you need, you need to have a clear question.

well a few minutes ago my mom went to go get a mri and she came back with the results and something was weird on her neck and i jokingly said it was throat cancer and she said and what if i found out it as and i said i would be on top of the world because i meant it as oh wow im smart you know like wow what a guess. but she took it thge wrong way and then i relized what i had said wrong and now she wont talk to me or do anytihng for me n she said you don't want me as a mother and don't ever say that again i said i was sorry and what i meant but she is acting like she hates me what can i do for her to stop hateing me

Sit her down, apologize, then tell her you really didn't mean it in that way. Maybe even write her a letter, so you can say everything you need to.
She will forgive you within time. Say you should have never joked about something as serious as cancer.
P.S, she doesn't hate you. She's just upset you'd joke about something like that.

ok... you've got a pretty good rating so i think you can help me
i had sex with my cousin, same age, same sex!
i'm female, 18
oral, and with strap ons and vibrators!
it was at a house party for my parents anniverary and we got drunk and it happened!
tbh i reli enjoyed it
probably the best sex i've ahd in my life
but i know it's morally wrong, and is it legally wrong?
i dnt know what to do about it?
help please?

Here's a list of words to sum up what I'm thinking:
Disturbing, wrong, incest.
Yes.. it's wrong. and I think you know that.
What to do? Not tell anyone. Try not to do it again.

ok i used this cucumber to pleasure myself a few times
and my mum like came in my room and asked me why i had it up here and then took it downstairs
i got it back but she's been actin weird about it and i dunno what to tell her!
i mean firstly i dnt want her eating the damn thing!
secondly argh what do i say!?
i tried discarding the thing but my sis (who i think has caught on what's going on) intervened!!! argh!! help!!! please!!!! what do i do!? :(

1. Find an excuse to throw it away
2. Find an excuse as to why it was in your room
3. Don't do it again

i love gettin fucked in the arse
17, f
but my arse ahs been well saw lately, feels reli bruised, maybe a bit scabby!
i get fucked in there daily
is it odd or normal for my rear end to be in this condition!?

Laying off anal sex for a while seems like a good idea, yes?
It should definitely NOT be in that condition. If it doesn't get better after having a rest from anal sex, you'll probably need a docs advice and medication =/

so i found a vibrator in my moms stash of things. lol before i use it or even think of using it..would that be totally gross if i did..she doesnt have std's or i would too since i am her daughter..but should i or shouldn't i use it. thanks

Don't.
You never know, you might misplace it or do something which will lead to her knowing you've used it.
It doesn't matter if she doesn't have STD's.. it's not the type of thing you'd want to share - especially if it's your mums.
If for some reason you do use it, wash it before and after.. and put a condom on it..

Hi, I have been trying to get my hair to grow out it seems for years. But, despite all my efforts it seems that it just won't get longer. Do you know of anything i can do to help it grow, or anything i shouldn't do? P.S. if it helps I have fairly long blonde hair; my hair is also fine but I have a lot of it so it is not thin. :)

Trim it a small amount. Like 1 cm. (and get rid of any dead ends if you have any). Yes, sounds weird, but it shocks the hair into growing.
Also, make sure you use nourishing shampoos and conditioners.
Make sure you're eating healthy, drinking plenty of water and sleeping well - they all help with hair growth.

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