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*WARNING*
If you are reading this then this warning is for you. Every word you read of this useless fine print is another second off your life. Don't you have better things to do? Is your life so emtpy that you honestly can't think of a better way to spend these moments? Or are you so impressed with the authority that you give respect and credence to all who claim it? Do you read everything you're supposed to read? Do you think everything you're supposed to think? Buy what you're told you should want?Get out of your apartment. Meet a member of the opposite sex. Stop the excessive shopping and masterbation. Quit your job. Start a fight. Prove you're alive. If you don't claim your humanity you will become a statistic. You have been warned...

"Contrary to what your mothers and teachers tell you, you are not a beautiful and unique snowflake. You are the same decaying organic matter as everything else. We are all part of the same compost heap."





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Website: http://www.xanga.com/rantsuck
E-mail: pimpstickagostop@yahoo.com
Gender: Male
Location: No one cares
Occupation: Journalist
Age: 22
AIM: shootthefat1
Member Since: February 10, 2005
Answers: 2248
Last Update: December 24, 2005
Visitors: 28839


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Advicenators.com



Is there a site on the internet (like cdzinc.com) that provides free listening music to everyone? I don't mean one of those illegal downloading sites, just a site where you can listen to the music but not download it.

no

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Ok, I have a question regarding text messaging and 3waying. :: How much does it cost per text message that I send? Do I have to pay for text messages that I recieve? I use Sprint, so is their any way i can include free unlimited text messaging in my plan so I dont have to pay for it PER message, instead, i could pay an extra monthly charge?How much per call does it cost to 3way? If i am on the fone with my friend and SHE 3ways someone, do I have to pay?

How bout this to answer the question in context with your texting question.

You're a dumbass. Call the dipshit up and say 'hey wats up'

You stupid shit. Quit wasting your time jodding down crap on your phone and sending a small mesage. Frigg'n call em up. You can say paragraphs more by talking to them within in a minute. Texting takes a frigg'n minute to get a sentence out.

You're dumb.
Enjoy.

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I have to give an oral presentation in fron otthe whole class, but I suck at public speaking. I start getting really red and then i start to shake and I stumble over words. Right now I am absolutly terrified at the thought of giving a speech. What can I do to overcome this fear?

Please dont give me an answer that says "you will fail everytime"

You will fail everytime.

You said please though. So since you said the magic word. ILl let this fly.

Practice makes perfect. but no one can be perfect so why bother.

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My mom won't let my peirce my belly, and i have wanted it for two years now. I have tryed to convince her that i want it done but she still says no! Any ideas? Please help asap!!!!!

Give in. The darkside has you. Your power will be greater on the darkside than the light could ever have given you.

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There's this one girl in my group of friends who moved into town after we all became friends and we sort of accepted her into the group. The thing is, she's always the subject of our joking and teasing, because sometimes she is really bossy and gives empty threats randomly every three seconds (like I borrow her pencil and she says, "Give me back my pencil or I'll punch you soo hard!" even though we all know she never will) sometimes I feel sorry for her, but she gets on my nerves a lot. What do I do?

Stop asking stupid fucking questions on an advice site or ill break your lower left rib.

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(16/f)
well, i recently broke up with my boyfriend. before we broke up, we told each other that even if we did brake up, we still wanted to be friends. it has been almost a week since we broke up and the jerk won't even talk to me. i have tried talking to him, being as nice as i possibly can under the circumstances. what is up with this? is he taking time and wasting away what we could have or does he not want anything to do with me? thanks in advance.

signed
confused & ready to kill the dude

How bout, young relationships never last. You both knew you'd break up. Its not an 'if we do' question, its a 'when we do' question.

You're dumb not to realise this.

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I have a friend who cant keep her mouth shut! She tells everything I say and I always try to remember tp tell her stuff but sometimes i am just itcing to tell someone. I really wanna be her friend but then again I dont NEED her! any suggestions? 5 points for anyone who helps! xoxo

Suggestions for what? Why do we care? Why do you care? You dont need her? But you want her?

Hmm. Im as confused as you are.

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I met a boy at a battle of the bands 2 months ago. We didn't really talk then, but he was really cute. Recently I found his MySpace & LiveJournal and he accepted my add. He told me I looked familiar and the conversation just went from there. He told me my picture was 'insanely hot' and it was like he was lithium and I was chlorine, if you know what I mean..okay I'm a nerd.

But anyways, my favorite song of all time, he can play on the guitar. He owns a leather jacket. He likes the Libertines and numerous other bands I adore as well. He LIVES for music and is really intelligent and random, just like me. We began talking about how we'd live together in a one room apartment with a big sofa, drinking and smoking and sleeping to pass time and prowling the nyc scene at night and living off cheese and coffee and making beautiful art together....it was intense. He told me out of the blue he thought I was really cute.

Now I have never had this happen. He is my dream guy and he wants to hang out or go any rock show I say. It might actually work out for once with a guy, and believe me, I'm not lucky. My question is...where do I go from here? And what do I do when I finally hang out with him?

He owns a leather jacket? Great, you should surely go out with this man. For the leather jacket.

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im a very good catholic. i really feel bad if i do so much as say oh my god. anyway. i have been sort of mastribating lately. when i get horny sometimes i use a fake penis to 'have sex'. is this sinning because i wanna know if i should stop doing this. please please please help

God's an asshole. If he cant realise the impurities in every human and accept that in us, then why should we give him our 2 cents in bowing to him?

Its total bs. The only cool guy of the bunch is Jesus. God, hes like the guy on Roid Rage. Seriously.

God is all like 'yo go kill your son'. So the dude he told it to is totally up for it, and when hes about to kill his son god is like. 'Ahahaha you gullible bastard im just jerkin your gerkin'. So hes telling someone hes messing around with killing someone.

If the bible wasnt accpeted as a religion a while back, this book would be considered extremely sick. Now, of course bible bangers cant cope with this fact. They believe God is quite nice. However why wont Catholics focus more on God? I went to a Catholic school in my younger days---it sucked ass mind you--- and all those people focused on was Jesus. The good guy.

Sure, Jesus is cool and all. But you're talking about god.

He's totally Pissed off at everything. He's constantly pumped. Moses hits a rock in anger, he killes him. Noah doesnt make a boat,---however he did, but if he didnt he would have killed him too-- he floods them and kills them. ---however he did kill practialy all of the world with his great flood. Why? Because God is one great asshole.


Sure, you're goingi to endlessly say, You're going to hell. But, considering God treats us like hell, what good is it to be in heaven? One bad thing you're in hell anyways.

By the way. Im Agnostic. Not Atheist. So dont go screwing me over on that.

Im just sharing my opinion with you. I'd like to hear your feedback. It'll provide a great debate.

Also, i just made a phat rhyme.

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Well hey yall, The other night , well day actually Me and my 'boy' were just Hanging out, right? Well yes i am young, A minor ( too young for kids either way ) .. Well yeah we hadnt seen eachother in forever .. So yeah we hung out n stuff yeahh.. Then we ended up having..sex & I left blah well Later on, His father ( yess.. can you say Ahh? ) he walked in the room saying he smelt sex & Picked one of the.. four condoms up and realized it was broken, This was around 5-8 or so.. on a Tuesday night, so I'm gona get tested to be safe ( i guess, right thing to do right? ) on Tuesday.. night probably like 9. Well, Do yall think its better to have a plan what to do before I find out, and we need to make one ? Lately alls weve gotten at is, "Shit were gona be even more fucked" , Or should we just worry about it later? Also, He is going to be 18 next year, And I will still be a minor, I am NOT bragging at all I just want help, But we both have very wealthy families.. Not sure how this happened, with bright futures, and How to break it to them? His father knows ones broken though, Whats the best thing to do here?

ABORT ABORT ABORT ABORT ABORT! Im gothalicous with cheese.

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at my school we need to wear uniforms, with mine i waer the sweatery thing, and latly its been getting really warm out, well i dont like to take my sweater off cause im kinda fat and i look really bad in the uniform. but the problem is since its been hot iv been sweating {even though i wear dedorant} and its smelling bad. im afriad i smell bad!! all my friends say i dont but still, my mom refuses to wash 2x a week. what should i do?

Your mother refuses to wash 2x a week? You mean she doesnt take showers? EEEEEEW! Nasty, hahaha you have a stinky mother!

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i am so upset righyt now. i told my friend some really personal things about my life. she promised she wouldnt tell anyone. it was mostly about this guy that i liked a lot. a real lot. we were firghtin the ohter day and she told him all my personal things and now she wants me to forgive her. i dont think i should because she doesnt deserve it. it was really personal and it wasnt his business. what should i do?

Beat her up. Dont give her forgivness. Sew her mouth shut, with a dull stitch. Shave her hair so she looks like those cats. Break her legs. And dislocate her thumbs. Then she'll look freaking hilariouse all crippled just sitting there. Then you cant take out the stiches and take her to a hospital so she can be corrected of the impurities you gave her.

After that, she'll definately listen to anything you say. She'll probably even be your slave. ENJOY!

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My b/f thinks im cheating on him... but his friends are telling me he is the 1 that is going around grabbing other girls butts! should i believe them and break up with him... or should i just go on pretending like i don't notice?

You havnt noticed. Your boyfriends friends have noticed. You know nothing. You have no intelligence.

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how do i get rid of red bumps after shaving my legs??!!?! please help! i rate HIGH!

Stop shaving your legs.

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I dont know what to do!! I have really liked this guy for the past year. He is just so awesome to be around. I can talk to him about anything, act goofy, whatever. He is almost perfect. I even love all of his cute flaws, its insane I know! So the problem is, we never officially dated because he was a freshman in college this year and I was a senior in highschool still. He lived about 3 hours away, and it just made things difficult. Well, he just moved back to the cities for the summer, and next year I am going to a college only 10 minutes away from where he goes. Sounds like everything is great now huh!? Well, I just don't know what to do. This past year we have become best friends, and I don't want to lose that at all, especially since we will be so close/in the same city now for a long time.

Can anyone help me here!? I would really appreciate anyones input..especially if they have been in a similar situation!! Thanks everyone!

What do you want help on? You didnt actually say directly what it was you wanted help on. There. Appreciate it.

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i work from 2pm til 10pm mon-fri. I eat fruit in the morning and at 3pm at i have a sandwich. I don't eat again until i get home when i will cook something reasonable healthy and quick. My problem is i am worried about eating so late in the evening and i don't sleep well as it is and wondered if eating late is making this problem worse. Could you advice me on the best foods to eat at this time of the evening please and whether eating at these times is unhealthy. thank you

No

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I was thinking it would be cute to have a yearbook each year that has pictures and memories of my friends and i. We have so many pictures, and I'd like to keep them all together in a cute book. My question is, where can I publish a yearbook thats not designed for school, and that I can order in a small amount (like, 7 yearbooks)

Make your own.

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when i have got my hands wet my nails go almost transparent and take a while to go back to the normal colour. does this mean i have a calcium defiency? if so what can i add to my diet to improve this as i already eat a fair amount of cheese and drink milk in my tea.

No, it means you're a mutant.

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i have a lot of trouble getting to sleep. i can't switch off wheni go to bed and i feel tired a lot of the time. I have tried cutting out caffiene, herbal sleeping tablets and all the obvious things and nothing works. can you help

Stay up later, screw waking up. Have an energy drink BAWLS is what i use for my kick in the nuts in the morning.

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Yeah.. I was at a 'get together' with a group of friends.. and we decided to play a game of some sort involving the opposite sex.. we were choosing which game.. and "Honey if you love me, smile" came up.. except I have no idea what that is.. ofcourse we chose a different game.. but for future reference.. how do you play.

GO up to the person. Say 'honey if you love me smile'. If they dont smile, you rub yourself all over them until they smile. Doing the dirtiest things you can possilby do of course!

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