about

I'm Jack/Jamie.

I'm 28 years old. I graduated from Michigan State University with my Bachelor of Science in Chemistry. GO GREEN! Now I'm a high school chemistry teacher in New York City living with my husband in a small studio apartment we pay way too much money for.

I've been on this site for 14 years as of March 23, 2020.
You may have seen me as CuxMiBeckNow7, but I've since shortened my name.


my forum
My FAQ






Here is my Recommended Columnist of the Decade for the 2020s:
Laura!




--Jack

advice

what does it mean when people say what not? Can give me an exmple?

Hmm. Like if I said "I like to eat ice cream, cake, and whatnot."

It basically means "things like what I just said".

So the "whatnot" of ice cream and cake are pie, cookies, etc.

Is that what you mean?

--Jack
(16/m)

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14/f
My friend destiny wants to move in with me and my mom when we move into an apartment. Destinys mom lives in another state and her dad is getting evicted from his mobile home. She lives with her grandpa but they always fight and he wants to kick her out. She's the same age as me but she does adult stuff. She has
alot of older friends up to 25. I don't mean to sound mean when I say this but I don't want her to be my problem. Shes one of those friends that your parents warn you about. I want to tell her that she can't live with me and my mom but I don't want to sound rude. What do you think I should tell her?

Tell her you don't want her to move in with you. Plain and simple. If you try to give subtle hints, it might end badly. The only way you're going to know for sure that she knows you don't want her living with you is to TELL her.

Thanks for inboxing.

--Jack
(16/m)

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Is is true that when sperm meets air, it dies?

Absolutely 100% untrue.

Sperm takes a bit of time to die, anywhere from an hour or two to many hours.

Anyone who tells you it dies when it hits the air is either very misinformed or lying.

--Jack
(16/m)

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I thoought period comes after every 21 days but then my mom told me it is supposed to be 28 days. My cycle comes every 21 days. Is that a problem or nothing serious?

Theoretically, if every woman had a regular period, it would be exactly every 28 days. But since that isn't how the world works, every woman's period is her own. Yes, there are certain things that happen with every woman's period, but the actual amount of days between is different.

21 days is normal- you're perfectly fine.

I think the only reason you should worry is if you stop getting your period all together xD.

--Jack
(16/m)

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I always have real bad morning breath when I wake up. why is this, n how can I make it so that I don't get morning breath?

Dang, at least now I know I'm not alone.

Really no one will notice your morning breath if you brush your teeth and use mouth wash morning AND night. So right when you wake up, or right after you eat breakfast [so that breakfast doesn't taste nasty afterward xD], brush your teeth and use mouth wash. And then it's gone. And like I said, if you start to do that right before you go to sleep, then it might be less-noticeable in the morning.

Sorry there aren't any magic tricks to get rid of it ;]

--Jack
(16/m)

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are there any common sayings?

debbie downer
negative nancy

i know we can make these up but are there any common ones?

Haha this one is from Minutemen, if you've ever seen it:

Naughty Ned xD

And I was wondering all of these myself. Thank you for asking this question ;]

--Jack
(16/m)

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do some computers have a built-in spell checker or is that a program you have to install?

I'm fairly confident that computers do not spell-checker in them, because your computer didn't create the programs you use, like Microsoft Word and IE or Firefox.

Like the person said below, if you have Firefox, it does have a spell checker and it won't fix it for you like Microsoft Word does, but it does have the red lines under it ;]

I'm not sure if IE 7 has this feature, but if it doesn't, it's just another reason why Firefox is a billion times better =].

--Jack
(16/m)

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right now im overdosed. i probably wont even remember that i wrote this. but i took like 10 advil, some pepto bismol, an anitbacteria pill. i had an ingrown toenail taken out today, so ive had shots of like morephine and adreneline? soo i think im overdosed. i feel like passing out and my pulse is a bit fast. my cast fell off of my toenail and blood everywhere. my period started again today, horrible, horrible cramps. what do i take for alllll the pain???????? i cant take anymore, im already overdosed.
15/f/usa

Mixing drugs together like that, in addition to the morphine and adrenaline is in NO way good for you.

Like everyone else said, get yourself to an emergency room. Overdose can lead to serious health problem and can even lead to death.

Please please please go to the hospital right now if you haven't already done so.

--Jack
(16/m)

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how can i change my username on advicenators?

Like Russianspy said, unless you have a paid account
[more info here: http://www.advicenators.com/paidaccounts.php], then you really can't.

If you have a really good reason for changing it, and you ask maturely, DangerNerd might change it for you.

Here's his column if you wish to ask him:

http://www.advicenators.com/column.php?u=DangerNerd

--Jack
(16/m)

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i have this friend i sit with at lunch, when her friends are there, i don't really have trouble finding something to say. but like today, they werent, i couldn't really find much to say. i just kept asking random questions after a short pause of every other minute. i didnt really use to talk much, so im not very good at communicating and keeping conversations going. like later on i thought of alot more i couldve said at lunch that i didnt. it wouldve helped if she tryed to start a conversation with me but she didnt. well, im getting better at conversating, i just got to do it more. but what are some tips on keeping the conversation going? and can you give me any ideas of what to say. like please dont say tell her a compliment. maybe you could tell me some questions i can ask? ugh, can you tell me what you say to start convos with your friends, that would help. this year i just got my confidence back, so im not really shy like i was. plus i want to change, haha.

Here's some general conversation-starting tips I've used in answers before:

www.wikihow.com/Start-a-Conversation-When-You-Have-Nothing-to-Talk-About

1. Always start off with something that others don't use often. Example: You see a girl in a bar and she's sitting with some friends. You walk up to her and say, "I would like to sit with you, but before I sit down, what are you drinking?" "Bud Light (insert drink)? Good choice. I'll be back with 2 Bud Lights (insert drink) and I'll hope that this seat isn't taken when I get back."
2. Start with a "hello," and simply tell the new person your name then ask them theirs. Offer your hand to shake, upon his/her responding to you. (If you go to other countries, greet the person in tune with the particular culture, e.g. in India greet by saying 'namaste' with folded hands). If you already know the person, skip this step and proceed to step 3.
3. Look around. See if there is anything worth pointing out. Sure, talking about the weather is a cliche, but if there's something unusual about it--bam!--you've got a great topic of conversation.
4. Offer a compliment. Don't lie and say you love someone's hair when you think it's revolting, but if you like his or her shoes, or a handbag, say so. A sincere compliment is a wonderful way to get someone to warm up to you. But be careful not to say something so personal that you scare the person off or make him or her feel uncomfortable. It is best not to compliment a person's looks or body.
5. Ask questions! Most people love to talk about themselves --- get them going. "What classes are you taking this year?" "Have you seen (Insert-Something-Here)? What did you think of it?" Again, keep the questions light and not invasive. Do not ask too many questions if he or she is not responsive to them.
6. Jump on any conversation-starters he or she might offer; take something he or she has said and run with it. Agree, disagree, ask a question about it, or offer an opinion, just don't let it go by without notice.
7. Look your newfound friend in the eye, it engenders trust (but don't stare). Also, use the person's name a time or two during the conversation; it will help you remember the name, and will draw the person's attention to what you are talking about.
8. Don't forget to have fun with your conversation!


Tips

* Just relax. Chances are that whatever small-talk you're making isn't going to stick out in anyone's mind a few months from now. Just say whatever comes into your head, so long as it's not offensive or really weird. (Unless, of course, the person you're attempting to converse with is into weird stuff.)
* Remember, if you think of something in your head while you're talking, it's probably related.
* It will help if you watch some TV, listen to radio shows, and/or read a lot -- newspapers, magazines, and/or books. You need to have some idea of what is going on in the world.
* If you are shy, it will be helpful to have thought about a topic or two that you could talk about.
* Follow the lead that your listener is expressing. If he or she appears interested, then continue. If he or she is looking at a clock or watch, or worse, looking for an escape strategy, then you have been going on for too long.
* Interesting and funny quotes or facts can lighten things up, and make way for things to talk about.
* If talking over the phone, keep the person involved in the conversation at all costs. If you can't come up with a good topic, try the "questions" game. Just keep asking them questions; random questions work just fine as long as they are appropriate. This technique can save a phone conversation. The questions should be open ended questions that do not require a yes or no answer. For example "How do you know the hosts?" This way you can ask questions about what they just said or follow up with how you know the hosts (for example) instead of acting as if the conversation is an interrogation.
* Half of an effective conversation is the way you non-verbally communicate, and not necessarily what you say. Practice better non-verbal skills that are friendly and confident.
* Read newspapers and magazines to increase your knowledge so you can have more interesting things to talk about


Warnings

* Don't be overly invasive with questions.
* Don't use tons of fillers like "umm" or "soo". It might make the person you're talking to feel awkward or obligated to say something. Instead talk slowly and pause. This will create a little tension and make your newly found friend more invested in your conversation.
* Don't desperately ask personal questions.
* Keep eye-contact
* Don't ever comment negatively on the person or someone's looks... you never know if they have a personal attachment to it or if they are friends with the person you are criticizing

I hope that helps a bit ;]

--Jack
(16/m)

[view]

there's a commercial on TV for the store target. what song is in the commercial?

It's actually "Hello Goodbye" by The Beatles. Obviously it's a newer version, and in each commercial, it's a different version. In one of them, it's the Jonas Brothers singing it.

--Jack
(16/m)

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is kyle xy over? was the last episode (the prom episode) the series finale? or just the season finale..

It was supposed to be the season finale. Because after it, they said "Watch for the brand new season of Kyle XY coming this fall", but I've heard rumor that the show isn't coming back. I'm not sure why, but it would be upsetting, because that is one of my favorite shows.

--Jack
(16/m)

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I have so much going on, and this is making everything worse. About a year and a half ago, i started going out with this guy Alex. I liked him ALOT, he was my first kiss! So obviously, you keep thinking about that moment that you first kissed someone, also he was my first true boyfriend. I was about fourteen, or about thirteen. at that time. I am almost sixteen now. I constantly think about Alex. We broke up because at my young age, i didn't know much about relationships then. Making it the fact that he was my first true boyfriend. We would talk on the phone EVERY night for HOURS. When i say hours, i mean HOURS. about 4 or 5 hours. then i would have to wake up for school about 3 hours after we hung up. i didn't care, i loved him. I was texting him about 7 months ago, He said he missed me so much and that he thinks his current girlfriend is a bitch [sorry for the bad language!]. And that he also thought about me constantly, and kinda wanted to dump his girlfriend for me. I was so happy that i was in tears. After that, i got a boyfriend about a week or so later. He got really mad because he hated the guys. I dated that boy for about six months. Then we broke up because he cheated on me, but thats a different story. I texted alex about.. a few days ago, he is still with his girlfriend, having family problems, etc. Now that he knows my number, he texts me all the time. But his girlfriend effing hates me. She wants me to die. So he has to go behind her back and talk to me. I told him how i really felt, that i was in love with him, and that i thought about him all the time. And that i wanted him back, and that i was really sorry for not being the best girlfriend. but since he has a girlfriend he couldn't really say anything to that. He just said "sam would fucking kill me if she saw that i was talking to you, i don't want to risk it". But i said dont even put me in your contacts, your under meghan in my phone, no one will find anything out. I offered for alex to come over because i haven't seen him in about 2 years now. He was scared i was gunna try something, but i promised him i wouldn't. But i wouldn't do that to him, i know how cheating feels! He can drive, hes turning 17 in may. I'm turning 16 in December. I really love this boy, so much. I think about him all the time, I cry for him, I listen to "lips of an angel" [that was our song] every night. I look at his myspace constantly [his girlfriend blocked me on facebook] Last night, he brought up our past relationship, saying why couldn't i ever hang out or why didn't we ever do anything? i said because i was young, i didnt understand a relationship. Then he asked me if i had sex, i said no im still a virgin im waiting for the right person. And then he said he had sex with his girlfriend. But the thing is, his girlfriend is ruining him, she smokes, she got him into smoking, and drinking and driving. I really want them to end their relationship. I really want him back, but i dont know what to do! Im really in love with him, dont say that i have many more years to live to find love. I found it already, i think of him ALL the time and cry, i have him written in my closet. i cry when i see it. 1/3/07 is when we started going out... i dont know what to do, someone PLEASE help me!!!!!!

Breaking up their relationship for the sake of yourself is selfish and wrong. I don't suggest you try if it's just for you.

If you genuinely want him out of his relationship because of what she is doing to him, then I would say that is somewhat fair.

Talk to him about it. Let him know, without being rude, that she has made him into something he shouldn't be. If he wants to be how he is now- you can't change that. I'm sorry. If someone tells you that you can, they are lying.

If he does want to change, tell him that getting rid of his girlfriend would be step one. Let him know that you aren't being selfish. Sure, you obviously want to date him, but if he does end up breaking it off with her, rushing in and trying to date him is not wise. Give him time to get over the breakup and clean himself up.

If and when he does this, then I would say it would be alright to try to date him. If he doesn't want to date you, you can't change that. If he does, well then you're in luck.

--Jack
(16/m)

[view]

what exactly is going on with oil? why is the price going up? are we running out? (sorry i live under a rock) and is that why the american dollar is losing its value? what countries are slowly rising to the top?

Oil prices are going up because there is such a high demand for it. It works with the supply/demand principle a bit. When the demand goes up, the supply goes down [in terms of gas it doesn't go down by much when a few people buy gas], and therefore the price goes up.

The media wants you to think we're running out, but we have a lot of gas here in America, it's just in National Parks where they can't really just take it. There's a lot in Alaska, too.

That has a lot to do with the weakening of the dollar. But I'm not an economist and I don't know all the reasons.

I am pretty sure that Singapore is slowly rising to the top, and I'm sure there are others.

--Jack
(16/m)

[view]

do they have a route to follow? they used to come into my neighborhood but now its like once per summer..

Yeah they usually have a route to follow.

They might be coming less and less because gas has become so expensive. Even taking their route may be too much money for them.

--Jack
(16/m)

[view]

So I met this guy online that I really like and I've known him for about a year. We just started talking on the phone a couple days ago at around midnight for like 2 hours and just yesterday we IMed each other for like the entire day and talked about nothing. :P

Problem is, we live about 600 miles away from each other so we can't see each other.

I'm 15 and he's 15- what do you suggest? Does he feel the same way about me?

I have a friend I met on here that actually has become one of my good friends. But the thing is, we've been talking to each other for a year and a few months now. She has my phone number, and I have hers, but I've only called her once and left a voicemail. We text occasionally, but not often. Normally we just talk on here, AIM, or Myspace/Facebook.

Yes, we have plans to meet in the future, and yes, that may seem like a stupid idea, but sometimes the people you meet on the internet are some of the best.

The reason I'm telling you this is because yes, I don't really see a problem with meeting him in person when you're OLDER. Like when you're an adult. And by that I mean in your 20s at least. That's about the time I plan to meet my friend.

Meeting someone you met online as a teenager, who claims to be a teenager, is not always the best thing to do. I've heard too many stories of people meeting people they met online, and it never ended well.

If your friendship is good enough, it should be able to last until you guys are a bit older.

And just to stop my lecture [sorry about that], he could like you. If you wanted to know for sure, just ask him.

--Jack
(16/m)

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i read the book "the catcher in the rye" by j.d. salinger a while ago (maybe months to a year ago) and i remember certain parts of the book pretty well but certain parts i don't remember at all.

i wanted to read this book over the summer because i heard that we're going to be reading it this upcoming schoolyear in english and i was just planning ahead. however, when i realized i remembered parts, i looked online for summaries of the book, etc. to refresh my memory (although there are still big gaps).

a few questions.
1.) i have like five more books i DEFINITELY want to read this summer (all for english this upcoming year) that i've never read before. do you think i should read "the catcher in the rye" again? or is it unnecessary?

2.) what is the meaning of the title "the catcher in the rye" ? like, where did that come from?

OPTIONAL: PLEASE ONLY ANSWER IF YOU'VE READ THE BOOK OR I WILL RATE DOWN!
can someone just like, reiterate the major events that took place in the catcher in the rye? i said this is optional because i've already looked at summaries online and they don't do spoilers, so maybe the 4 or 5 most important things that took place?

thank you so much!

1. I think since you've already read it, you should read the other books first, and then come back to it if you have time.

2. The Catcher in the Rye is really Holden who claims he will catch kids who fall off of the cliff or whatever. It was only like a sentence out of the entire book. There is a lot more symbolism behind it that my class and I explored when we read it last year, but I don't remember most of it.

Here's five events that I remember, and therefore they are probably the most important/prominent.

1. Holden leaves Pencey Prep [I think that's the name].

2. Holden remembers his brother's baseball mitt with all of the poetry on it. It kind of symbolized his brother's free expression and Holden not letting go of the past.

3. Holden buys his sister the album she wanted, but it ends up falling out of his hands and shattering. It sort of symbolized Holden's life; it was beginning to shatter.

4. Holden goes home and talks with his sister about how smoking is bad, among many things.

5. Holden sees the F word written all over the walls of an elementary school and tries to erase it off of the walls.


Really I don't remember much. What I do remember is that Holden had an intense vocabulary when it came to cussing xD.

--Jack
(16/m)

[view]



Argh!!!


Okay Guys..


I must of taken tons of pictures and I have no idea how to get it to the size of 15k! I have even gone into image resizeable etc. All my pictures are 900mb! :O Yes that's right.

If anyone can maybe help me out on how to resize it that would be fantastic!!

Thanks!

-BahaiMa22

Trust me, it isn't worth the effort to try to get it to be that size. That is such a small size for a picture. By the time you get it there, and look at your column, it won't be worth it. You'll be disappointed at the size.

But I used your name at the end to find your column, and you have a picture there that is a fairly nice size. =]

But...

My friend Laura gives some good ideas on how to get a full-sized picture on your column like a lot of people do:

http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=545689

Enjoy =].

--Jack
(16/m)

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okay so i have always been turned on by a naked female but i always thought so did everyone period and that it didnt mean i was a lesbian. but lately i have been craving more and more to be with a girl sexually and emotionally. i end up catching myslef having a crush on a girl and wanting to hook up with her but i cant bring myself to actually do it. idk if its because i really am not a lesbian or if i am and dont know how to get something started with a girl. can somebody help me?

You're still young. It's normal [at least by general consensus] that you're feeling these things.

If you imagine that you'd do these things, but you can't bring yourself to actually do them, you might be a lesbian, but maybe not.

If you want to see if it's for you, there's no harm in trying it out. Not that I personally would, but it might help you decide your sexual preference.

Generally if you're sexually AND emotionally attracted to the same sex, you're lesbian/gay. But some people will say that unless you actually do things with the same sex, you're just curious.

But you're still young and you have a lot of time left to figure out your sexuality. There's no need to rush it.

--Jack
(16/m)

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me and my boyfriend live in different states
and we talk somewhat more then we did before becasue we got into a huge fight about it and i guess he realized i was right
but girls will add him on myspace and he tells them their cute.
and it makes me mad cause hes suppose to be with me. and i dont go do that stuff
and ive told him before about this and hes like im not doing anything shes just my bestfriend
well this girl is like a new friend and they dont know eachother at all
and it makes me so mad cause he doesnt understand my feelings
and i commented him and he told me to text him so i did
and he said one thing to me and i texted him back twice
and then i told him that i hate when he comments girls about being cute
and of course he didnt text me back. im getting soo frustrated with our relationship
and i know all we can do is talk about it. but he likes to call me at like 2 in the morning when a normal person is suppose to be sleeping at that time. but i dont cause i wait up all night for him to call. and sometimes he doesnt even call
and yesterday i took a survey on myspace and it said she did you last text and it was like mike and justin
justin is my friend and mike is my exbf..
and he asked me who they were and he got mad when i told him who mike was and i tohught it wa cute
but he cant get mad at me cause he talks to soo many girls.
but should i worry about him calling girls cute on myspace?
i know i shouldnt but we live in different states
and he could be messaging that girl right now or like talking to her on the phonee
he cna be doing anything without me knowing
i need helppp :[

sorry that this was long
and probably confusing

Part of a long-distance relationship is trusting that the other person will remain faithful. You're right; he could pretty much do whatever and you might not know about it. I'd say calling girls cute isn't something to fret about because I do that sometimes when I'm dating someone, and it doesn't mean anything.

I think the only time you should worry is if he's talking to all of these girls MORE than he talks to you, if that makes sense. If he talks to you more, there probably isn't much to worry about. If he talks to them more, I would talk to him about it.

If he claims there's nothing going on, you really just have to accept it because after all, he is your boyfriend.

I think the two of you should put your jealousy issues aside and just be happy that you have each other. Sorry that wasn't meant to be rude.

--Jack
(16/m)

[view]

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