Hi, I think that you need to get Paul alone, and tell him that you need Nathan out of your life and why. Now, you also need to make sure that if he hangs around Nathan, that you don't either, so if he hangs out with him all the time, then you should get that straightened out, you guys need time together too, so I think that you should let him hang out with Nathan, but don't be around him when he is. So, basically, you have to talk to him about it, tell him everything, say, "Paul, I know you like hanging out with Nathan, but I need to stop being around him because those feelings might come back, so can you help me out?" anything like that.



-TheTeenGirl

Well, getting over the cold takes a while, but you need to talk your mom into getting you Day quil, and Ny Quil medicines. It makes the symptoms go away. And your nose is sore because you're probably using a paper towel, or regular toilet paper, you should use the 'Kleenex' lotion in the tissue brand, its very soft and doesn't hurt. Make sure that when you walk, you have a coat on when its cold and if you have to run, start walking earlier and don't run.


-TheTeenGirl

I suggest the rubber band, but you need to tell someone first, or you will fall back into your old habits. So, you should tell a parent/guardian about it to find out whats up and prevent it from happening again, as you can see, cutting does nothing for you.


-TheTeenGirl

I've had a few pranks, but all they want is a response, and just rejecting them is what you should do, because they want youn to fight back.



-TheTeenGirl

Hi there, thank you very much. Now, about this crush, you made the right moves that most other girls would not make, you never tried to flirt with him because he had a girlfriend, and you decided to give him time when he lost her. Its been 3 weeks now, and I'm sure hes probably not over her yet, but when you have someone new, sure there will be comparison to an old boyfriend or girlfriend, but it doesn't mean that he can't love you more than he loved her. No, you can't replace her, but you can take her spot of being his new girlfriend, he will always remember how much he loved her, but then he will focus on the present, which would be to move on, and after he moves on, maybe you could try talking to him, now I know you wanted to get over him, but maybe you could try getting into his life. The first thing you could try saying is, "I know you don't know me, but I heard about your break up." Or write him a note. You've crushed on this guy for 8 years, I think you definetly owe it to yourself to say something to this guy. I think you should give communication a shot, and if it doesn't work out, then at least you don't have to sit at home a year later thinking, "I wonder what could have happened if I would have talked to him." You should go on ahead and say something, anything, like your sorry about the break up. It takes guts to talk to someone you love, I know, but just take chances, if you want to, you can tell me if you said anything, because I'd be really glad to help you through it, thanks for asking me.


-TheTeenGirl

I have a boyfriend, and I call him baby, and babe too. And he likes it, the thing is, guys don't really show what makes them 'shiver' and excited and in love. But, you basically call him the same thing back, I had that question a long time ago, but now I know that there aren't any names that we ladies are missing out on. Honey, darling, sweetie, pumpkin pie, sugar plum, its all cute and lovable for guys. Baby seems feminine too, but 'baby boy' works. But, if you wanna respond, just say, "hey my little dumpling." I do that a lot to sound funny. But, when you're in love, you don't have to really worry about the names. Also, I had a friend named Derek, and I always called him Rerek. Making a name out of a real name is more original and memorable. But, I'm not sure if those names makes them fall like we do, it makes us fall hard. But yeah, I hope I helped.



-TheTeenGirl

You problem with not asking for help because you fear of looking stupid, is the most common fear in school. But, heres the thing, you don't have to ask them in front of everyone, but I am going to tip you on something. A lot of times when you sit in class, you can name the slackers, and then you have the "nerds" the smart people. Now, slackers are also people who don't know the answer to what you are asking, and nerds ask people for help too, and they don't say anything when someone else is asking. When you go to raise your hand and ask for help for the first time, think of nerds and slackers, its sound goofy, but it will make it easier on you. Another very good thing you can do is after class, not only ask the teacher the question you were afraid to ask, but you can say, "I'm sorry about me asking this after class, but I am really having trouble with asking this in class in front of everyone."

Now, about your mom, shes just having a hard time believing this, because shes just being a mom, and I'm sure you understand this. But, I am suggesting to see the school counselor. They are usually nice, and they like to help, and they could probably help you, they could also help you with letting your mom know that this is very serious, its not being shy, its more. Now, you may not have social anxiety, who knows, but what you are telling me sounds like being shy, I'm not sure how old you are, but if you are a teen, you probably do not have social anxiety.



-TheTeenGirl

This is an addiction. I am suggesting that you have your mom, or just you, throw the chocolate away, or hide it and lock it up. You should get fruits, vegetables, meat, all of the good stuff, and live on that, chocolate is very good, but you should have it every so often, not everyday. You have to bare with yourself at keeping occupied and that won't make it harder to bare. Hide everything that is chocolate, after about a month, reward yourself with a glass of chocolate milk, and a Hershey bar. After not doing something for a about 21 days, its no longer a habit. So, I don't think you'll start up again with it. But, don't ever go and get the chocolate fo any reason, even if you're crying, or need it badly, just don't eat it, you will live without it, you can't let chocolate control your life.


-TheTeenGirl

For your first question, if this guy:

1.Makes YOU happy
2. Has never tried to hurt you, in a physical, or emotinal way on purpose
3. Makes YOU feel good about yourself, and never puts you down
4. Is respectful to you
5. respects your friends if they are nice
6. Makes an effort to let you know he loves you
7. AND never hits on other girls or flirts with them in front of you on purpose

Then this guy is a big keeper, and what everyone says to you about him is very questionable. Now, I am pretty sure that there may have been an inccident with him cheating on you, or doing something mean to you or bad, that you could be leaving out, because, there has to be a rason why people say so, and if its because they are bitter and thinks hes ugly, then you are about the only girl who has respect out of those people. So if you said yes to about 6 or 5 of those questions, then don't listen to anyone, the ones you SHOULD have checked are:

2, 3, 4, and 7. But MOSTLY 2.

For your second question, I suggest maybe doing something wild and crazy, whether it be getting in swimming suits and jumping in mud puddles on a hot day, or playing spin the bottle/truth or dare kind of wild. And then after, everyone in a circle, and talk about memories, make a great big album with lots of pictures of all of you and give it to her to keep forever, maybe get one of those huge cards and have a poem saying how much you will miss her.

*A good poem site is here:
http://www.thestarlitecafe.com/ (type it in your search box to go to it.)



-TheTeenGirl

No, you definetly shouldn't, you need to tell that girlfriend what her boyfriend has been doing. You would not like it at all if you had him as your boyfriend and was flirting with a certain girl and giving her back rubs, and the girl letting it happen would you? Nope. You need to say, "hey, its nice that you give me these back rubs, but I think that you are coming on a bit strong, you have a girlfriend, and it would probably hurt her if she saw what you have been doing." Now, him being the one you have a crush on, it will be hard, but you can at least add, "you should end things with your girlfriend if you want someone else." Don't keep letting it happen, say something about it, you could at least ask, "do you like me?" straight up, but don't let it go on.


-TheTeenGirl

That would actually not work. If you wanna find out now, pregnancy tests will tell you, I suggest First Response. But remember this, when the condom falls off don't keep going like, "oh well" stop having sex and put it back on.


-TheTeenGirl

Ok, you've got some big issues here. First off, for your boyfriend, Paul, say to him, "When I told you that it took forever to get over Nathan, I meant it by if I continue to see him, those feelings will crawl right back." He will get the idea about it, but as for the drug thing, you need to really get a drug-free guy, if hes been doing drugs. That guy needs to be honest with you. Ask him straight up, "Paul, I don't want explainations or arguements, I want a yes, or no, are you doing any type of drugs at all?" If he says no, then you should at least ask Nathan, I know you don't need him in your life, but you care about Paul, and even if it takes a ask him and walk away fast to get an honest answer, do it. If it turns out that Nathan says yes, confront the issue to him, and ask him. When you tell me it wouldn't be right to take Nathan out of his life, it shouldn't be to him, because it could mean losing interest from his girlfriend. This guy sounds like a big problem that you're in love with. What if it turns out that he was lying about doing drugs, not only would you have to add drugs, but then comes dishonesty. Honesty plays a big part in relationships, theres more fights to come your way if this continues, and then, what if he won't try quittung for you? He may not seem like a problem now, but he will be. What you can actually do about the Nathan situation is to not be around him while around Nathan, I hope you are not thinking right no, "but hes with him all of the time!" Thats another problem to add, I am seriously not trying to be a jerk, or harsh, I am saying that this guy will probably not last. A good way of getting off of drugs is rehab. But, you need to get this guy to listen to you instead of fight.


-TheTeenGirl

I remember in school, my best friend was always being talked about badly, and I felt like I should tell, but I knew that if I took it very offensively, then she would and it would hurt her feelings, so just water under a bridge is how it should be taken. You can say, "I know her, and shes very nice to me, when I got to know her, shes nothing you guys are describing." But, I think you should leave them alone.


-TheTeenGirl

I am thinking that it sounds not so good or normal at all. So, you need to prevent anything like, "a cutting fettish." Everytime you have a scab, put a band-aid over it, and when you get the urge to do it, you need to just bare with it, and keep it on, you need to keep yourself occupied, and try watching out when you walk, because if you keep that up, your going to have some hard times and embaressing situations.

-TheTeenGirl

Yes, its very normal, its just cuts, and I think you need to wait way longer than 2 days to shave again, because, it needs to grow back for a while, shaving it while its got only a little hair HIGHLY increases the chances of more cuts, (red dots.) And, preventing them would be by always using shaving cream, and not soap, and shaving carefully, very carefully. Its a girl problem, trust me, embarresing questions are ok to ask, more than ok, in fact, if its too overwhelmig, you can ask me in my inbox, and I won't ask who you are, I'll just answer you.


-TheTeenGirl

First of all, don't let your friends jump her, it sounds pretty uptight of someone to want to jump someone over words, and as for your ex friend, ask her, "ok, I thought you had ended things with me, you are cool now, so don't you think hanging around with me will ruin your reputation?" I know shes probably not cool, but its what she considers herself, so I'm not suggesting to do it in the sake of fighting, or letting her be called cool, its to get inside of her head about why shes still following you. She sounds rude anyway, but don't let your friends jump her, I think the frienship ended depressing enough already, so don't make things worse. Just ask her whats up.


-TheTeenGirl

Well, I can't say that I was no longer good at things, but I can tell you from experiance that being locked up in your room forever is the farest you can get from being happy again, I also can say that I use to think people were better than me at things, but these are just thoughts, if you keep having this thought linger your mind, that thought will become a real life problem. Keys to happiness can be hard to follow, but I will give them to you.

*Be positive, digging for whats bad in a life situation or any for that matter just makes it all the more depressing.

*Give yourself credit, doing homework, and going to school, finding out it was wrong and got a bad score can be sucky, but you tried, so just say, "hey, that wasn't so hott, but I tried, now all I have to do is ask for help" as oppose to "my god, I fail everything, now I'm gonna have to do better if my mind is big enough."

*See the learning, when a bad situation happens, like death, or someone getting injured, just try to say, "well, that was very upsetting, but now I know to never do this, or do that."

*Find a way to contribute, doing things for yourself can be good, because you're pleasing yourself, but you will feel the same about doing it for others.

*Recognize and act on your values, doing something important to you can make you feel good, accomplishing things that are important to you, so try your best at doing whats important to you.

*Focus on what you WANT and take steps towards it, have you been always saying, "someday, I am going to take piano lessons" but never took them? Get your parents involved and do it, take action with your wants.

*Allow yourself to dream, basically, don't dream of something and crush it with, "that will never happen." Just dream, maybe those dreams can come true.

*Enjoy life's small pleasures, if everything is a big mess, doing something relaxing makes it more of tensing than pleasuring, think about what you are doing at that moment, and think "everything will be ok."

I hope you try to make an effort with this.


-TheTeenGirl

Oh man, you remind me of myself, I was best friends with a girl from second grade, I lost her in 7th grade, I lost her to way overaged teenage guys. It sucked, and took me forever to get overv it, I'm still not over it, but what I think you should do is ask, "what happened to us?" And talk to her, and ask her why she never told you any of these things, they weren't small things, this was big, as in moving out of the state, and having a child. And, you guys could decide to just not talk anymore, since she basically now has a busy life with 2 kids. Or, if you're both willing to pick up the pieces of the shattered relationship and put it back together, then I say go with that. But, to be honest, with her and you in different states, its probably most likely not going to work. But, you can try, I'm sorry about losing her basically, I know how you feel, trust me.


-TheTeenGirl

Thats horrible, I'm so sorry. But, I think that you should at least tell him this, "I know this is very hard for you, it pains me to see you the way you are, but I just wanna let you know that I am here when you're ready to talk about it, and you take all the time you need to feel better, I am here for you, and I feel bad that I can't help." Basically, all you need to tell him is that you're here for him, don't approach talking to him about that very subject until he feels ready, he just needs to know that you are there and you understand why hes upset and not talking much. Don't worry, you are not being selfish, you are caring for him, and thats what is good about you, and don't worry about the way he is right now, he will heal, and it may take long, but he will get through it, you may also want to ask him everyday if theres anything you can do or him at all, small favors, big favors, anything that he needs so he knows you love him and you are there for him, I really think thats all he needs right now. You may also wanna get his mother involved, or a family member, and ask them for help, maybe contact them. But, I hope he gets back to his old self, good luck.

-TheTeenGirl

Chick Flicks:

*Mean Girls
*13 Going On 30
*How To Lose A Guy In 10 Days
*Sweet Home Alabama
*Pretty Woman
*Two Weeks Notice
*Maid In Manhatten
*The Sweetest Thing
*Coyote Ugly
*Sixteen Candles
*My Big Fat Greek Wedding
*The Wedding Planner
*Miss Congeniality
*Never Been Kissed
*Legally Blonde 1 & 2
*Save The Last Dance


I can't seem to remember comedies except 2:

*10 Things I Hate About You
*Just Married



-TheTeenGirl

My name is Erin and I am now 18 years old. You may realize through out looking at my column, some of you love me and some of you flat out hate me. There's really no gray area with me I guess you can say.

I haven't given advice here in so long and it's only because I got caught up in life. But I'm more mature than I ever thought I could be.
So anyway I'm here again. It's been a long time, but I still love giving advice and still plan on it in the future.

Everyone should feel free to Private Message me for advice, I can be harsh, but I'm always trying to help someone by giving them the truth they need.

About My Ratings:
I enjoy ratings. And if I ask a question on here, I always rate the person. If you work hard to give advice, you deserve to be rated.

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