about

I'm Jack/Jamie.

I'm 28 years old. I graduated from Michigan State University with my Bachelor of Science in Chemistry. GO GREEN! Now I'm a high school chemistry teacher in New York City living with my husband in a small studio apartment we pay way too much money for.

I've been on this site for 14 years as of March 23, 2020.
You may have seen me as CuxMiBeckNow7, but I've since shortened my name.


my forum
My FAQ






Here is my Recommended Columnist of the Decade for the 2020s:
Laura!




--Jack

advice

i just told my boyfriend that I've been with for a year and three months that i made out with my ex who he hates and he broke up with me he took me back but still doesn't know how he can ever trust me again what should i do?
i was with him yesterday and we were having a great time and then he just got all down
i hate the fact that i cheated on him and i know he would never do it to me
i don't know why i did it
i don't have any feelings for my ex anymore i lost those feelings when i broke up with him
please help me?

If you KNOW FOR SURE that you will NEVER cheat on your boyfriend again, tell him ONE more time.

If he can't trust you, I honestly don't see a point in you dating him. Not to be rude, but relationships should be based on trust, and if he can't trust you, I don't know why he would still be dating you.

Perhaps he can't trust you now, but thinks that maybe he can after awhile.

As for now, you need to remain faithful and reprove yourself. There isn't much more you can do.

--Jack
(16/m)

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if you have unlimited text messaging, but you live in FL but you text someone from MA. does that cost extra?

Not usually. I have a friend I text in Illinois and I'm from Michigan. And even though that's not the same distance, I'd assume the same principle applies.

If you aren't sure- contact your service provider.

--Jack
(16/m)

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ok tell me your thoughts on a girl being too clingy .. can you tell me what a girl is actually doing that makes her clingy and annoying to the guy? bc idk i feel like i need to talk to this guy i like but i dont want to come on too strong and clingy bc lately he hasnt talked as much to me in the last few days as usual.. do you think he might think im too clingy or something? or that maybe he just is taking interest in another girl?

You're only clingy if you're CONSTANTLY trying to reach him or when you're around him you're always next to him.

Calling him once a day isn't clingy, but anything more than 3 times a day is clingy.

Maybe he'll think you're clingy. So maybe wait until he contacts you. If he doesn't- maybe he's just busy.

Thanks for inboxing.

--Jack
(16/m)

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I don't want an answer to make me feel better. I just want an opinion. Is it ever okay for a guy to cheat? Even if he said he was drunk when it happened and he had sex with someone else, though he rememberes what he did during the sex?

I think its a stupid excuse, and he remembered everything but his girl. I just want opinions. I say cheating is NEVER okay.

Thanks.

I don't really have a detailed explanation, but I agree that cheating is never okay in any case. That is, unless the person is raped, well then obviously, but unless the person isn't being forced into cheating, then it isn't okay.

Does that make sense?

--Jack
(16/m)

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15/f

ok so recently in the summer ive hung out with more guys and got more guy friends and all but ive never had a boyfriend .. and when school started i started sharing a locker with my friend brandon because my locker is too far away from my classes .. and i dont know he shows signs that he likes me i think because he invited me to his end of the summer party and he kept telling me how much his parents liked me and all and we have very long texting conversations alot .. i just dont know really how to tell if he really does like me and also he is friends with my friend dan and he tells me that he thinks dan likes me and im like well he doesnt show it .. because at the end of the summer party dan bearly talked to me and brandon said that he was all over me and i didnt think so .. so i really am confused and i dont know if brandon or dan likes me or both and i dont know what to do so if you have any advice since your a guy i would appreciate it thanks!

I personally think Brandon may like you, and Dan probably doesn't.

Here are a few ways guys show they like you from a list I've used before:

1. They don't call you "sexy". They call you "beautiful", "gorgeous", "amazing", etc.

2. They make an effort to hug you. They might high-5 instead, but it really depends on the guy in question.

3. They DO find any reason to touch you in some way. Mostly it ISN'T in a sexual way. Its more of just an excuse to remember what you feel like, I guess. Its hard to explain...

4. He is always smiling around you. If you're feeling bad and he's around- he'll be smiling because he knows that he's there to help you- and that's like brownie points for a guy if they can help a girl out. That, like the above, is hard to explain.

5. He'll tell you things about himself that he normally wouldn't tell everyone. He opens up to you. Guys don't get a chance to do that when pressured to "be manly".

6. If you have a feeling that a guy likes you- you're probably right. Guys aren't the best at hiding it- and girls are even better at figuring these type of things out.

There you go! ;]


Thanks for inboxing!

--Jack
(16/m)

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when is saying "cannot" or "can not" right?

Both are right.

http://alexfiles.com/cannot.shtml

The second paragraph explains it nicely. =]

--Jack
(16/m)

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So, I watched Napoleon Dynamite (starring Jon Heder) and was wondering about the liger thing. Do ligers exist? If so, how are they any different from regular lions and tigers? Do the male ligers have manes like male lions or are they more like tigers?

Can anyone supply some liger pictures too if ligers are real?

Also, how in the world can a lion and tiger breed if this is true? I mean, they're totally different big cats, right?

Any information about ligers is highly appreciated, even if it's just an article explaining the joke or myth.

Yes, ligers are real, but are rare:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Liger

There you go =]

--Jack
(16/m)

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How can your voice sound better. what are some ways to get your singing voice to sound good.

My friend on here, Amy, [aka Igotamonopoly here], has a great website set up for singing tips. She knows what she's talking about! ;]

http://www.geocities.com/singingtips/sing.html

--Jack
(16/m)

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I think I might have whooping cough, seeing as there's been more than 30 cases of it in my county. As far as symptoms, I have a runny nose, I cough like crazy, and in the beginning I had a really sore throat (but it's gone.) But the thing is, I was vaccinated against it. o_0 Is there a chance I have it? The coughing only gets worse everyday. x_x

14/f if it helps x)

Chances are that if you were vaccinated, you probably don't have it. But, I don't know how many different types of whooping cough there are, so you may have a different version, though, like I said, the chances are slim.

If you're worried, please go see your doctor soon before the symptoms get worse.

=]

--Jack
(16/m)

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I remember seeing this rock the vote commercial on MTV a while ago and said something like "in the last election the difference between amount of votes in the two runners was x amount" and then it said the number of people 18-25 who didn't vote was a higher number. then then said how young people can decide the future and stuff like that. i've been using google and youtube to try to find what they said and i haven't been abe to find it. All i want to find is what they said, i don't need to find the actual commercial. I just don't know what else to do to go about finding it. Can someone help me find it?? Thanks.

http://www.rockthevote.com/about/

I remember the commercial you're talking about, but I don't remember the numbers they used. All I remember is that what you've said is what they said, of course with the numbers.

On the website I've given you, it said "We empower 45 million young Americans..." so I was thinking that maybe that was the number they used.

The gap, therefore, must have been less than 45 million votes, which seems right because there are only 300 million people in America, and probably only like 200 million can vote or something.

--Jack
(16/m)

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What would you do if you like a girl (PLEASE don't say "tell her" I want like subtle things or signs or something like that.... like SHY ways)
sorry, these two guys act TOTALLY different but in a way the same (and I THINK they like me but I'm not sure. I'm used to just being "one of the guys" so I don't know things like this :/)

Are you asking what guys do when they like a girl?

Simple! Here are a few from a list I've used before:

1. They don't call you "sexy". They call you "beautiful", "gorgeous", "amazing", etc.

2. They make an effort to hug you. They might high-5 instead, but it really depends on the guy in question.

3. They DO find any reason to touch you in some way. Mostly it ISN'T in a sexual way. Its more of just an excuse to remember what you feel like, I guess. Its hard to explain...

4. He is always smiling around you. If you're feeling bad and he's around- he'll be smiling because he knows that he's there to help you- and that's like brownie points for a guy if they can help a girl out. That, like the above, is hard to explain.

5. He'll tell you things about himself that he normally wouldn't tell everyone. He opens up to you. Guys don't get a chance to do that when pressured to "be manly".

6. If you have a feeling that a guy likes you- you're probably right. Guys aren't the best at hiding it- and girls are even better at figuring these type of things out.

There you go! ;]

--Jack
(16/m)

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I was reading in a magazine recently that the Abercrombie & Fitch company actually owns Hollister. I like both Abercrombie and Hollister anyway so it wasn't a big deal to me. Anyway, I was thinking about the 1922 year that Hollister puts on their clothes. Does Hollister put 1922 on their clothes because that's the year Abercrombie & Fitch was created and they have to put something about Abercrombie & Fitch on their merchandise because Abercrombie owns Hollister?

I mean, I really love Hollister but 1922 doesn't make sense to me because Hollister clothes are created NOW. I also know that Hollister clothes are stylish now but they probably weren't in 1922.

Any information is appreciated.

1922 is when Hollister was established. Yes, they were created now, but you'll notice numbers on designer clothes, and usually they are the year that the company was established.

--Jack
(16/m)

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I am a 14 year old male. I just started my first day of high school on September 2nd. Today is September 5th. Schools been relatively good until today. What went wrong is that a bunch of girls wanted to talk to me. Some approached me and I talked to them. The others said hi as I passed and I didn't talk to them. When I talk to or get talked to by girls I get shy & nervous and I stutter and am really slow figuring out what to say. Please help me figure out what to do. Be Yourself doesn't help me, sorry.

I could give you some conversation-starting tips? Because if you have in mind that you first WANT to talk to them, and second, what you're going to talk about, you'll seem more confident and not shy.

Here:

www.wikihow.com/Start-a-Conversation-When-You-Have-Nothing-to-Talk-About

1. Always start off with something that others don't use often. Example: You see a girl in a bar and she's sitting with some friends. You walk up to her and say, "I would like to sit with you, but before I sit down, what are you drinking?" "Bud Light (insert drink)? Good choice. I'll be back with 2 Bud Lights (insert drink) and I'll hope that this seat isn't taken when I get back."
2. Start with a "hello," and simply tell the new person your name then ask them theirs. Offer your hand to shake, upon his/her responding to you. (If you go to other countries, greet the person in tune with the particular culture, e.g. in India greet by saying 'namaste' with folded hands). If you already know the person, skip this step and proceed to step 3.
3. Look around. See if there is anything worth pointing out. Sure, talking about the weather is a cliche, but if there's something unusual about it--bam!--you've got a great topic of conversation.
4. Offer a compliment. Don't lie and say you love someone's hair when you think it's revolting, but if you like his or her shoes, or a handbag, say so. A sincere compliment is a wonderful way to get someone to warm up to you. But be careful not to say something so personal that you scare the person off or make him or her feel uncomfortable. It is best not to compliment a person's looks or body.
5. Ask questions! Most people love to talk about themselves --- get them going. "What classes are you taking this year?" "Have you seen (Insert-Something-Here)? What did you think of it?" Again, keep the questions light and not invasive. Do not ask too many questions if he or she is not responsive to them.
6. Jump on any conversation-starters he or she might offer; take something he or she has said and run with it. Agree, disagree, ask a question about it, or offer an opinion, just don't let it go by without notice.
7. Look your newfound friend in the eye, it engenders trust (but don't stare). Also, use the person's name a time or two during the conversation; it will help you remember the name, and will draw the person's attention to what you are talking about.
8. Don't forget to have fun with your conversation!


Tips

* Just relax. Chances are that whatever small-talk you're making isn't going to stick out in anyone's mind a few months from now. Just say whatever comes into your head, so long as it's not offensive or really weird. (Unless, of course, the person you're attempting to converse with is into weird stuff.)
* Remember, if you think of something in your head while you're talking, it's probably related.
* It will help if you watch some TV, listen to radio shows, and/or read a lot -- newspapers, magazines, and/or books. You need to have some idea of what is going on in the world.
* If you are shy, it will be helpful to have thought about a topic or two that you could talk about.
* Follow the lead that your listener is expressing. If he or she appears interested, then continue. If he or she is looking at a clock or watch, or worse, looking for an escape strategy, then you have been going on for too long.
* Interesting and funny quotes or facts can lighten things up, and make way for things to talk about.
* If talking over the phone, keep the person involved in the conversation at all costs. If you can't come up with a good topic, try the "questions" game. Just keep asking them questions; random questions work just fine as long as they are appropriate. This technique can save a phone conversation. The questions should be open ended questions that do not require a yes or no answer. For example "How do you know the hosts?" This way you can ask questions about what they just said or follow up with how you know the hosts (for example) instead of acting as if the conversation is an interrogation.
* Half of an effective conversation is the way you non-verbally communicate, and not necessarily what you say. Practice better non-verbal skills that are friendly and confident.
* Read newspapers and magazines to increase your knowledge so you can have more interesting things to talk about


Warnings

* Don't be overly invasive with questions.
* Don't use tons of fillers like "umm" or "soo". It might make the person you're talking to feel awkward or obligated to say something. Instead talk slowly and pause. This will create a little tension and make your newly found friend more invested in your conversation.
* Don't desperately ask personal questions.
* Keep eye-contact
* Don't ever comment negatively on the person or someone's looks... you never know if they have a personal attachment to it or if they are friends with the person you are criticizing




--Jack
(16/m)

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i'm making some kick-a grpahics to go with some photography i took a while back. and i'm looking for some awesome quotes to put on them. i don't want anything cliche or over done. i mostly use a lot of random lyrics, or small bits of quotes i find every now and then. here are some examples:

"be young, think smart, stay true, and just follow your heart."
"live like you meant it."
"happiness will only come to those who already appreciate what they have."
"i need you like a lyric needs a melody."
"it's not faith if you use your eyes."

i'll all for the whole "i'm happy to be alive and thankful for what i have" kind of thing. any takers? (:

I've only got one, for now. But please check back later, and I might have added a few as I think of them.

This quote is about how you should appreciate life and not get so caught up in problems, but just enjoy it:

"In three words I can describe what I've learned about life: It goes on,"

-Robert Frost


;]

--Jack
(16/m)

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i'd like to hear everyone and anyone's opinion, but i'd love for the older columnists to help me on this one... question being, do you think there is a certain age in which you can REALLY fall IN love with someone? Or do you think you can fall in love at any age, whether you're 16 or 50? So many people say at 8 you cannot fall in love, yet at 16 you can.. what is the difference? of course, the difference with any age is experiance, but do you guys really believe these theories? i want opinions!!! thanks =]

flirty

I completely disagree with Comrade.

I think "I love you" shouldn't be said until you've been dating for at least a year and a half, but preferably two years. Why do I say this, you ask? Well, to be frank, it pisses me off when people in relationships at, for instance 3 weeks or 3 months say "I love you!", when they don't know what it means. Love is indescribable, and to just throw it around as if it were nothing is SO irritating to me. Love isn't something you can normally feel after being with someone for a few weeks or two months or something; love is something you feel when you're about to get married or are already married. Don't get me wrong, there are certainly exceptions, but chances are you're not it, to be honest.

My advice to you is to not say it until you're absolutely CERTAIN it's love, and really, you'll know. There IS a fine line between infatuation [which teenagers mistake as love] and actual love. When you're mature enough, you'll know what that difference is. Now I'm not trying to sound like I'm some master of love because I'm not. I've never felt love like that, I've only felt love for my family, friends and most importantly God, but that's a different kind of love.


For more insight as to why I feel this way, feel free to read my answer to this inbox question:

http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=548817


--Jack
(16/m)

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13/m, Hi, ive had pubic hair for a couple years now, and ever since ive gettin it, ive been mastrabating, and ever since i got pubic hair, it seems like my maturing process has slowed down. I dont yet have under-arm or facial hair. Is it just that i mature slowly, or am i maturing more slowly, because i am not yet fully mature, and i am mastrabating. Please help

I asked this question, and you already answered it, however i lied about my age, because im embarrased of my slow maturing. I am actually 15 and a half. Im scared something is wrong, considering that i am 16 in 6 months, and i am not nearlly fully matured..is there a problem?

Everyone grows and matures at different ages. I think I'm pretty close to the end of maturity in terms of growing and such, but I could be wrong. There's no way to know unless you're in your mid 20s. Usually by then you should have reached your peak height and such.

As for facial hair, honestly, be lucky you don't have to deal with it. It's such a hassle to have to shave every morning, and even more of a hassle to not shave it. I started to have to shave in my freshmen year, so about two years ago.

I think you're still pretty young in terms of growth. Most people start growing at 12 or 13, so you're only 2 or 3 years in, and you still have 4 or 5 years left. So you're not done, trust me.

Just relax. Things will happen in time.

--Jack
(16/m)

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What is the dffernce between catholic and christian religion?

There is a slight difference. Yes, Catholicism is a "branch" of Christianity, but Catholicism's main belief is that the Communion is to be taken each week, just as Jesus told us to do.

Some sects of Christianity believe in doing that every so often, but if I am not mistaken, only Catholicism [Roman Catholicism, as well] believes it should be received every week.

But both believe that Jesus is the Messiah.

--Jack
(16/m)

[view]

Okay yesterday i was watching that high school music get in the picture show or whatever. And there was a part where they switched personalities, and Stan sang a song as a goth. it started out as "i can show you the world" anyway i loved it. haha. and im trying to look on youtube and other websites just to find the clip where he was singing but i cant find it. help? if it helps, im pretty sure it was episode 10.

Was it "A Whole New World" from Aladdin?

Like the Disney movie?

If not, I'll look again.



**EDIT**

After hours and hours of searching on YouTube, I have yet to find it. Sorry. But I don't believe I should be rated down because it's not there.

--Jack
(16/m)

[view]

OK, I just started going out with this guy and for his birthday coming up I got him this book that I know he wants. I don't know what else to get so I was just going to leave it at that. But then the other day he gave me roses and told me that he wanted me to know how much i meant to him, so now i'm trying to think of what i could add to the gift that would say the same thing to him as the flowers did to me, if that makes any sense. :) Anyway, if anyone has any suggestions, please let me know. thanx :)

Yes, the roses were a nice gesture, but since you just started dating him, I think getting him just the book would be fine for now.

If you give him too much too early in the relationship, it might scare him off.

Maybe make him a card with a poem you wrote yourself or something saying that he means something. Just don't spend too much money.

--Jack
(16/m)

[view]

okay i know this may sound kinda stupid but,
what exactly does PDA mean?
thanks in advance :)

Personal Digital Assistant.

Wikipedia it next time, since Wikipedia has ALL the answers ;]

--Jack
(16/m)

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