about

Hi. I left and came back. But I don't like this column anymore. Check out my new column.

http://www.advicenators.com/column.php?u=thefish

advice

ive a friend, ill call him B weve been friends all thro HS, @ this party he was trashed and was making out w/ me i dindt care no big deal, until he invited me over that nite to have sex, i was like umm thanks but no, over the nxt few days he's trying to hang out all the time and hookup, hes HOT but were pretty good friends, so its random and wierd, i had to travel so he was trying to hang out b4 i left, so the morning i was gonna leave he was liek cum over i wanna say bye meanwile im only gone for 2 weeks not a long, time so i went and said by, no biggie just since wen do friends try to fuck friends? im saying ill prolly hkup w/ him but i dont want tings to b wierd ya kno? write me bak!

Hmm...he wants to be with you...but I think he's going about it the wrong way...though it seems to be working, you seem to want it as much as he does...so whatever...do it...don't worry about the future...live for now...but be SAFE.

[view]

I'm 14 and I'm one of 3 people in my grade that doesn't have a cell phone. I'm constantly out with my friends and they don't like me to call home on their phones cus it uses there minutes. *They didn't mind at first but when I have to constantly call home they got frusterated* My parents want me to call all the time when I'm out. I've tried explaining to them all the reasons why I need one, Like how they want me to call home and all that but they still say you dont get one till your 16 like your brothers. Well, im not my brothers, im more responsible, but i tried to tell my parents that and they wont believe me!
What should I do?

I think they're being unreasonable. If they want you to always call them, they should get you a cell phone. Try going out one night and NOT calling, and then when they ask why say, "Well all my friends had no charge left on their phones, so there was no way for me to call."

[view]

I was wondering if anyone here ever had a handfasting and could tell me if it was a good experience. And could you possibly direct to a website with info on handfasting.
I'm asking this because I recently changed to Pagan/Wiccan and I just want to know what my religion has for weddings.

Here's a good one: http://www.uuottawa.com/paganweddingsmain.htm

I've never done it, but that's how I'd like to get married. *nod*

There's some part of it where you tie the bride and groom tie their wrists together. Heh heh.

[view]

When I would sit in the tub for like 30-60 minutes, I would notice that the water would get gritty and then I would rub my skin and it would come off!!!!!! Then there was a lot of DIRT or something on the sides or the tub when I got out, is this normal!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?! Thanks in advance for helping me (IF YOU DECIDE TO BE RUDE THEN I WON'T EVEN RATE YOU!!!!)

Ha. Okay, I get it now. Skin is supposed to shed, it's normal. But don't just sit in the tub. You have to take a washcloth or sponge, rub soap all over it and scrub every part of your body.

No, definitely didn't steal the answer. But atfirst I thought you meant that your skin was actually falling off in the water. O.O

[view]

okay the problem is when i sweat and stuff my hair gets REALLY frizzy, almost like in the movies when someone gets elecricuted! it sticks up everywhere, and everyone else has perfect hair lying flat on their head while dripping with sweat, and even the slightest bit of sweat and i turn into a puff ball or something! i have soccer tryouts tonight at 4-6 and the rest of the week, and then i have a soccer tournament saturday and sunday, does anyone have some ideas on how i can tame my hair so i dont look like i've been elctricuted while i'm playing soccer?! pleeeeeease help, this has been happening forever and i am sick of it. i rate 5's for answers that arent stupid or unhelpful. ♥

I have the same problem, the only way to deal with it is shave your head. Okay, you might not want to do it, but the shaved look isn't that bad and you can wear cool scarves on your head, it looks really good.

[view]

Ok. There was this baby i was babysitting and a little kid. i put them to sleep and i was watchin TV. then i heard the baby cry. i ran upstairs and the little kid was ontop of the baby! i do not know hwat to do!! i dont want to tell the parents but the baby might be hurt. HELPP

Uh...you should definitely tell the parents. It's their kids after all. If their baby is hurt, they need to know, the same goes for if their other child is violent. Was this like, a sexual thing or was he trying to kill the baby or what?

[view]

I DONT KNO WHAT TO DO.... i dont have a shirt to match my jeans! help.... what color looks best with jeans... FASHION IS EVERYTHING!

It's not really what goes with the jeans, because basically anything can go with jeans, but rather what goes with you. Different colors look good on different people, as well as different shades (like, some look better in light colors). Likewise, the wrong color can make you look like a re-dead. You might want someone else's help with this, but you can do it yourself in front of a mirror. Try covering yourself with a white cloth and holding up fabric of different colors to your face. You'll see that some make your eyes look really vibrant and beautiful, and some, as stated above, make you look like a re-dead. Also, jewlery makes a difference too. I look better with silver, but you might look good with gold. You can go through all that trouble, or just go to the store and try on a bunch of different tops (though I think most places only let you have five or six things at a time), or you can use a shirt you already know is fabulous on you. And remember, it's one thing to try to look good, it's another to obsess over it; fashion is NOT everything.

[view]

im sooo tiried of people at school calling a slut or a bra stuffer just i have big breast doesn tmean i stuff my bra. and i have been going out with alot of guys and the baddest part is that i went out with three best friends and i broke their friend ship do you guys think that i should try to not have a boy freind for a while so that people could stop calling me a slut??????

Yeah, I do. You need to take a break from guys. If you go out with a ton of guys, one after the other, you're not serious about a relationship. You should stop dating for a while and focus on yourself! You'll find your mind will be a whole lot clearer. And if they don't stop calling you a slut, well, try your hardest not to let it bother you. They don't know you, so why do their opinions matter? If somebody says it to your face, just laugh cheerfully and say, "Better a slut than being enslaved and starved!" or, "Takes one to know one!", or possibly, "Slut? More like...I'm NOT a slut." So yes, stop dating for a while, and don't let the names hurt you.

[view]

i always hear the term "pop your cherry"! Whats the cherry - i know it has somethign to do with a vagina-, and how do u 'pop' it. it kinda scares me and grosses me out if i think about something on your vagina popping and blood coming out. okay well i use tampons so how do i know if my cherry is popped and whatnot. thanks.

It's called a hymen and you've probably already broken it.

[view]

Hey there ♥ well im not really into stereotypes but basically, my boyfriend is punk, along with his friends. and i am not really preppy or punk or anything, i am just me. but i am friends with his friends and his friends are in a punk band and my boyfriend said he really wants me to go, and so do his friends. the problem is i dont want to wear something stupid, or "slutty" looking and i dont want people to think " why is she here?" so what could i wear.. i have long platinum blonde hair with lots of pink and auburn in it. and i am 5'4 and average with slightly curvey body but the problem is i cant hide my boobs and i dont want people to automatically think im slutty=/... what could i wear or put on for makeup and how should i do the hair? thanksss

Wear black baggy jeans, a long-sleeved red and black striped shirt, a black T-shirt over it, maybe you can even cut the sleeves a little so that they're frayed, and lots of plastic bracelets. Also, a silver pentacle necklace. And tie your hair with a black or multicolored scrunchy, and wear snake earrings. Not slutty at all, you cover everything.

[view]

hey im going to start modleing im 13 and well my mom and i want to know everyting to know bout it

i will rate high 4 or 5's

Hmmmmm...don't do it! Models suck.

[view]

well see iv only kissed one girl before in a truth or dare game and she kissed me back and all but it was only a peck on the lips and im afraid becuase i always wanted to have sex but like im a little nervous now but only for like making out and the girl another time was dared to give me a handjob (yes we are physco) and i couldnt get a boner i tried for a really long time but i couldnt like does anyone know any things that can help me with kissing and is it because im nervous that i cant get a boner...i didnt think i was nervous but i might of been..sorry if its confusing


-123-

Don't worry, I hear that's normal for guys. You're probably just nervous. Try meditating or practicing kissing your pillows.

[view]

hey I have a question when ppl where eyeliner do u line the inside of your eyelashes or the outside...im confused on how to wear it...

You do your eyelids.

[view]

Ok..I really really like this guy soo much, but we've only hung out 4 times, one all night..and we talk online & on the phone alot..but I don't KNOW him KNOW him..like i dont know how too explain it.. He's cute, SOO SWEET, and funny, well, he's perfect for me...and he tells me he loves me so much and everything. Today he said if we were older he'd ask me too marry him, which scared me..and now I just feel a LITTLE weird..bc I love him, but I don't know him well enough to marry him. But I really do feel he cares about me...but another thing is that he's older than me...and he's had sex, and I haven't and he walsy says "baby you don't know what your missing.." and "i wanna make this sumer one you won't forget ;)" and i'm thinking that he wants me too have sex with him..but he's told me that he doesn't want too push me into it, but he does it slightly...I don't know..

Any advice???

Lots of love & noise

Think carefully. Why do you love him? What would you do for him? I don't think you really love him, not yet, you just have a major crush. And I don't think he loves you either, he sounds like he just wants sex.

[view]

okay...
well...
uhh..
this is hard for me to ask this
but i have already fingered my g/f and we both want more
we are WAY TO young for sex about 5 years from it, what can we do thats not sex d00d please help

You can feel her up, she can give you a handjob, you can play monopoly, you can read Jane Eyre together, you can go on a nature hike, play video games, oral sex, dry humping...there's lots of stuff, just use your brain.

[view]

Is there a way to knwo if your cherry is popped? I am very active in sports and have been for over 6 years but i don't remeber randomly bleeding or feeling a pain down there liek a tear. I'm active with my boyfriend but not having sex... i just want to knwo if theres and easy way to know or if you just have to wait and find out

Hm. Put your fingers in your vagina and feel around? I guess...

[view]

theres a pool party coming up in about 2 weeks i was wondering if there were any cellulite removing excersizes or creams that would work quickly! or atleast minimize it, I only have a LITTLE under my butt, im not fat or anything, its just embarrassing!! please help me!

It's a party, forget how you look and just relax and have fun.

[view]

My Mini Ipod isn't cooperating with me. I dropped it and its been stubbourn ever since. Nothing dramtically happened when I dropped it. The next time I went to use it, it showed a folder with an "!" in a triangle. I know that that sign means that my files are corrupted, and I was told to re-update it. So when I went to do that, I got a drop down saying that there was an Error. Anyone know whats going on and what I can do?

Oh well. That's what you get for trusting technology!

[view]

Ok, me and this girl have been talkin' 4 a while now (for like 6 months). We were just friends at first but I've always liked her. She's been in really bad relationships and thinks men are dogs and will treat her like dirt. I really like her though and I wouldn't do anything like that. I like her too much. Plus I'm not even that kinda guy. I wanna love her and show her trust, honesty, and loyalty. She's been so hurt that she can't see that I wouldn't do that to her. I wanna be with her; she is the most incredible girl I've ever met. On top of that I think I like her so much it might be turning into Love. I need some GOOD advice. Help!
P.S. I'll rate high.

You know who you remind me of? Tamahome, who I think is the perfect man. And since everything in life can be solved with a comic book, I'll tell you what Tamahome said to Miaka after she had been raped and wanted to kill herself, thinking that he would never be able to love her again. He said, "You're perfectly clean. You're no different from the day of the purifying ritual. Exactly the same. At that time, too, I thought nothing could be as beautiful as you. No one can defile you. I swore that I'd be with you forever, right? And I'll swear it as many times as I have to because you are everything to me." That's kind of how you feel, huh? You need to tell her that, and if she still doesn't believe you, you need to show her that. The only way you can show that you'd never hurt her is by being with her and supporting her and just basically never hurting her. Good luck with that.

[view]

ok im on page 131 of the newest harry potter book (half blood prince). wut is "the dark mark". please tell me unless i have to read on to find out. i read all of the books (1-5) but dont remember the 5th too good. did they explain it there? PLEASE dont give it away if im not supposed to kno yet! PLEASE!!
thanks a bunch!

ps-please hurry
pss-ill rate 5s for the fastest answers

Hehe. It's Voldemort's symbol. He burns it into the flesh of his followers and uses it to summon them when he needs them. He also fires it into the sky above any house that he just killed all the people in. Go ahead, ask me another one, I know everything about Harry Potter.

[view]

<<< Previous Advice Column
Next Advice Column >>>
humorist-workshop
eXTReMe Tracker