I am a father of three, girl, boy, girl, all are now over 18. I have been married for 29 years as of 6-30-07, so yes, if you do the math I was married at 18, just after graduating high school. I am very aware of the pit falls of doing so, but we made it through the really tough times. I came to this site, because of my daughter, she also uses the site.
I am an author and have written three books, only one under this name, but it is not how I make my living. I am in business, working full time and I have a seasonal business in ponds, selling Koi, goldfish, water plants and supplies. I help people to plan and build ponds, as well as, maintenance if they need it.
I am not here for the ratings and could careless what you rate me. I will tell you things I know, I will tell you what you don't want to hear, but most of all, I will tell you things from my perspective. I have experienced a lot in my life, I have not lived with my head in the sand and I'm a realist, you want someone to blow smoke up your as*, don't read my writings, (I don't do fairy tales).
I am not so foolish as to think I am always right, I can only tell you what I know and give you something to think about. It is up to you to find out if I'm right or not.
Life is complicated, because people are complicated and one answer does not necessarily fit all, but that doesn't mean you should not consider what I say as a possibility.
Feel free to write me personally if you wish, there is only so much you can say in such a restrictive environment as this site is, it doesn't allow for proper conversation.
Thank you for coming to my column and giving me the chance to help.
E-mail: gibber@cableone.net
Gender: Male
Location: Minnesota
Age: 53
Member Since: May 14, 2008
Answers: 285
Last Update: March 27, 2013
Visitors: 26921
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what kind of injury can you get from playing baseball and you have to quit or stop playing it for a while during preseason. Please give details. thank you.
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Most common are strains, the ones that effect the throwing arm will keep players out for awhile. Pulled muscles and ligaments are also quite common, most tend toward the lower leg, but some of the most painful can be in the upper leg. Knees often receive some of the worst abuse in all sports, torn cartilage in the knee is a big time waster. Joints, knees, elbows wrists, ankles, hips, etc..., all are vulnerable, some to more degree then others. That is why you warm up, stretching muscles is a way to keep some of these things from happening. Most of these things happen when you move wrong, (try to do something the body is not meant to do). There are more injuries, but they are more obvious, impact injuries, running into the wall in right field for example, these rarely keep a player out for too long though.
I hope I helped, but I think you can find much more on the topic by searching the web, try Sports Injuries, see what you find. By the way, I hear that is quite a lucrative field to get into if you're looking for a carer.
Be well my friend
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my friend cheated on her boyfriend. her boyfriend forgave her and they are on a break now. so i want to have a talk with her but i dont know what to say to her. we already know she made a mistake and all that stuff. but now i want her to make sure she appreciates everything her boyfriend is doing. for example: he is still talking to her, texting her and appreciates her. i just want to talk to her about that and remind her. how do i do that or what do i say? (link)
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The way to approach this, if that is what you truly want to do is, the most obvious way. "I'm just curious mind you, I would like to know why you did this. I am even more curious to know if you know why." The main thing in talking to anyone about something that is personal is, don't appear to judge. Never use the negative terms to them, such as cheating, for they know you disapprove. Cheating is a term that I will not use in the case of someone who has not made their vows. Boy friend and girl friend, is not a vow, they are at best a loose commitment. If she did it out of doubt, that says something, if she did it out of shear horniness, that also says something, any reason she gives says something about herself.
I think that him forgiving her says a lot, but what it says is determined by why he forgave her. Does he separate sex and love, or does the thought of it turn him on? Or, does he just love her that much?
Approach it from a curiosity stand point, it is the least threatening stance, and be cleaver in the way you approach the things you really want to say. When the time is right, ask her, "Do you feel that you are lucky he forgave you? How do you feel about the fact he still calls and talks to you?" Etc..., she may already feel as you do, then you don't have to say it.
There is another thing for you to consider, she may have done this to test him and try to make him jealous, it just got carried away. Be a friend and try to help her get to the bottom of it, it maybe she needs a new boyfriend, one who conforms better to what she BELIEVES she wants. We all test boundaries in all our relationships, perhaps in an unthinking way she got an answer she was looking for, but does not know it yet.
Feel free to write again if you need further help, I'd also be curious to here how it goes, if you are so inclined.
Thanks for writing, hope I helped.
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Hi Okay I am wondering if someone could tell me what is considered a normal vagina. I am very insecure about mine and I am scared to let my boyfriend in my pants. I have an apt. with the gyno but that's in a month, and we can't wait that long. Is it supposed to smell like fish? If not, what should I do? How can I make it smell better? Do you think he'll care if it isn't normal? But I don't even know what normal is. I am very confused! Please help ! (link)
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Here I go again, answering something I should not. There are plenty of other reasons for you to be scared to let your boy friend into your pants, but trust me honey, that's not one of them. I'd tell you an old limerick from when I was young, but I only remember half of it, maybe someone knows the rest of it though, it started out, "If it smells like fish, eat all you wish, if it smells like", that's where I don't know the rest.
You don't say your age, but I hope you will consider holding off long enough to at least see your OBGYN and try to learn a few things first. Make sure you're well protected against pregnancy and STD's, that means you both use birth control. Him a condom and you have several choices, pick one, but Never go with out a condom, unless your married to him. Then if something goes a stray, having a child will be a greater blessing. Please learn more before taking this leap, you can't go back once you do it.
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When I was younger, I used to be of such unshakeable faith in myself. No matter how hard things got, or whatever befell me, I always kept trying.
I'm still trying, but I lost so much faith my ability to succeed. And I'm worried I'm becoming a jaded cynic.
How, besides actually really succeeding at something, can I regain my confidence and faith in myself? (link)
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I know this is going to sound to easy and you'll probably just dismiss it, but here is the secret. Know your good.
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ok well i need get on the pill. no i am not sexually active nor do i plan on it soon. I do know that I am 14 and ready to start dating. I know how strong of a person i am and i know that i may not be able to say no to my bf when he wants to have sex. I will always have a condom on me and thought about female condoms. but i think well know that i want to be on the pill. i live in il if that helps! I just dont know what to do where to go whom to got to or anything so yeah. any advice is well appricated! (link)
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I'm going to give you one thing to think about, For your own health even the makers of the pill will tell you you should not be on the pill collectively for more then 10 years. This means at 24 you will have to go off the pill for your own sake. So, you are going to have to go to using condoms or something to that end. Since most people marry later in life now, you and your husband will have too go through your sex life together with him wearing a condom, since most other forms of birth control advise the use of condoms with them.
You should not use birth control unless you are going to be sexually active, or are told by your doctor too, for purpose of regulating your period properly. No relationship you may have in the future has to move so fast that you can't take the time to get birth control. Read and know the facts and side effects of anything you are going to be taking almost everyday of your life for as long as you will the pill. Don't go in blind.
There is a reason why people, (your parents, preachers and others who care), want you to wait until your older to become sexually active. It's not because they are mean and want you to suffer, it's because there are more consequences then you realize, maybe more then you can understand at 14, no offense meant. Sex carries a very high price to it, far beyond pregnancy. Please wait until you have read everything about the pill and more importantly, understand the ramifications mentally, physically and emotionally, for both you and your partner, that sex can bring. Understand well the dangers you face when you take sex as something so casual that you start planing it more then three years ahead of when you should be considering it. While your looking into the side effects and warnings on the pill, search Sexually Transmitted Disease, or STD's. There is so much for you to learn before you take this step, where to get the pill is such an easy thing, knowing what your getting into is what you need to find out and it's too bad you don't want your mummy to know, she could be of great help in bring you to understanding this.
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How do I talk to my parents about sex and purity? Whenever I bring somthing up with my dad he gets mad at me and with my mom it just gets akward. What can I do? I want to stay pure till marrige, Im thinking about getting a purity ring just as a reminder whenever it starts to go to far with a boy. How can I bring up a conversation with my parents. I have a little sister(11) if that helps at all. Thanks in advance! (link)
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There is one thing you and all children, (which we all are if you think about it), need to realize about parent's I'm a parent and a child of course. I have always tried to be open to being approached about anything with my three children, (now all adults), but for some people it's hard. Parents get so use to looking at you as a child, when adulthood comes along, they can't help but still see you as a child, they may never get past this.
You don't mention your age, but I assume you are at least the standard two years over your sister, so 13 or above. Now they may think it is still not appropriate to talk of such things at your age. It also sounds like maybe serious talk is not all that common between you and your parents, so I suggest you set your sights lower, going from talking about what clothes to wear to school, to talking about sex and purity, just maybe too big a leap for them.
Spend some time and I'm talking days or weeks, could even take months, engaging them in conversations, gradually going from lighter topics, to heavier ones, eventually get to the one you really want. Talk to them about politics, religion, things adults talk about, not things that children talk about, I'm sure you'll find this enlightening and stimulating. When you feel that they are starting to see you more as an adult, try going to light romance conversation, you know, how did you and dad meet, or what were the kinds of things you did for dates back when you first met, get them thinking of the old days.
Go into this with a well thought out plan. Think of "off the cuff" questions you can ask them and write them down. Put them in order from light topic to heavy. As you are helping your mother in the kitchen, get her talking as if it were unplanned. Focus on your mother, but work on your dad too.
Consider him practice on how to engage men in conversation, start simple, you should know his interests by now, then start slipping a few easy going questions on him and work your way up with him too.
Take care to start these things at the right time, don't interrupt times of normal solitude, or reflection time for your parents. Depending on what they do for a living, you may be interrupting their brain down time. If they spend a lot of time at work using their brain, they undoubtedly have a time soon after coming home where they like to shut their brain down for a while. Watch for patterns, (routines), they follow, alone times are important to everyone, remember when they have the do not disturb sign hanging on their forehead, respect that.
Too many young ones don't respect that their parents are people and they don't respect them as individuals, but expect them to treat them as such. If you want them to treat you like an individual and adult, be aware of them and their rights as individuals, as flawed as they maybe. Acceptance is probably the most important thing in life and I can count on one hand those I feel have really accepted me. Your parents should be, but most often aren't among the people you count among those who accept you, but I would ask, have you accepted them, or do you want them to be something they are not?
Be open, take it all in, reject nothing, contemplate everything, see the possibilities, live in reality, but most importantly, see the truth.
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How do you do a virus scan on your computer
do you need a speical program?
if so how much does it cost?
Thankss.
=] (link)
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There are many that are free on the web, search Malware, I believe it is, I find that to be quite effective.
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25f. for the last two months or so I have had absolutely no sex drive. It is driving my boyfriend crazy. I don't know what the deal is...I never think about it and almost never want it and when I do have sex I just want it to be over. I do not take birth control, I eat healthy, my boyfriend is attractive, and I have not changed my diet. Does anyone know maybe why I am lacking in this department or how to jump start it again? Thanks (link)
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Women at 25 do not have the same sex drive as men at 25, but I would look back to when your sex drive stopped, what happened then. For women, the sex drive is more thought then anything else, for men it's visual. If there is nothing you can trace this back to, try reading something racy, a romance novel perhaps. If it helps, you know you haven't been stimulating the pleasure center. This is the only part of the brain that is stimulated during sex for women, where with men, two other parts of the brain are stimulated as well. This is why porn works better for men then women. Also, see a recent post in my advice column about this same subject, consider the other option that I gave her to consider.
My advice to you is to get your boyfriend to slow down and let you warm up those hot thoughts in your mind, or maybe have him tell you a sexy fantasy story if he has a good imagination. Maybe even try a little fantasy of your own in your head, maybe someday you can share one with him.
I don't feel comfortable with saying much more on an open web site that is read by children. I'm 49 and have been married for over 30 years. I have many more "insights", if you will, tricks to keep play time fun. Feel free to write me if you find any of what I have said helpful. Also, you and your boyfriend should read up on the female playground so you know the equipment you haven't been playing on.
Good luck and have fun.
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I'm in a serious relationship but there's a problem. I love my boyfriend (I'm female...sorry :P) but I'm not physically attracted to him anymore. Like I think he's hot (because really, he is!:P) but when he tries to kiss me or hug me I just roll my eyes - I just don't want to do it back to him.
I used to love hugging and kissing him but now there's just something in me thats died. I only have two (pretty lame) theories: 1. I've been finding studying and work stressful (I just started a new job) and I thought that may have something to do with it and 2. I started taking the pill about 4 or 5 months ago and I've heard that can effect that sexual drive - or what ever it's called.
Anywho, my question is does anyone know what could be causing this? And any ideas on how to overcome it?
Thanks heaps (link)
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I would also suspect the pill first, research that angle first. I know from experience that the pill is very effective at killing a womens sex drive and is stated as a side effect. Talk to your doctor, another form of the pill may change this for you, but I wouldn't bet on it. You have to remember that the pill stops you from getting pregnant by fooling your body into making it think your pregnant, there are going to be these kinds of side effects to them.
To give you a third option; You may have reached the highest point of liking this young man and it is not high enough for you to be full filing. I have found that love has only one level and it never truly stops, but like has many stages and if you can't get to the point where you are both each others best friend and confidant, you will never feel whole together. Don't jump on this one right away, reaching the best friend stage takes a long time.
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In my company there is a colleague from America. (I'm a chinese ).Sometimes when he walks over and starts a conversation with me, he tends to touch on my arm (almost like just a brush ).I feel it too intimate because in my country colleagues of different sex normally don't have any body contact except handshake .
So I'm wondering is this normal in his culture or does he try to mean anything? (link)
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Answering your second question put to me,
One, never take anything that comes out of Hollywood as normal behavior. It is common in some circles for a man to offer his arm to escort a lady, but the women has the choice to take it or not, besides, you have asked about what is proper in business. A familiar touch such as this is most often an invite, he's making the first move. You pull away, it tells him you're not interested, you don't and you accept his advances, or courtship if you like. Things may be different in different parts of the U.S., but all my experience in business says that, aside from a hand shake, you go out of your way not to touch someone and that goes double for a man when dealing with a women. Over here law suits start that way and many men are fired for less then that in some business. Some of those who run companies here are so paranoid about sexual harassment charges being brought that they often find it easier to fire the men that are accused of it.
It is a very one sided thing over here. Women often do it to men, but we can not take it for what it appears to be, an advancement. If we do, some women have turned around and charged sexual harassment. The trouble is, men can never know for sure if the women is interested, or just setting you up. I think we'll leave it there, you can probably tell that I have a great dis stain for this often time lopsided judicial system and thinking of life here in the United States, I may not like it, but even as poor sometimes that it is, I still think it is better then anything else, no offense.
If you feel you have a good working relationship with him, just ask him next time if his touch is meant as a come on, or if he just does not consider his light touches as meaning anything. Tell him you have spoken to other Americans who have suggested that it is an advance made toward you, then go from there. Tell him for his own good that it is considered improper in your culture in business for him to do this.
We do have the few people who will reach out and actually place their hand on your forearm or shoulder. We are rarely hung up on the occasional ACCIDENTAL brushing together if quarters are tight, but no, if you feel that it is intentional, it is not considered proper in our culture. I think most people are protective of their personal space and if you put it to this guy as, "I am uncomfortable with you getting so close and invading my personal space", he should understand this statement and back off. If he does not, ask someone else to intercede on your behalf and explain to him that it is considered improper in your culture for him to touch you.
Hope I helped
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I like this guy and i know hes kind of a manwhore. He openly admits to loving sex and people say that is pretty much what he wants from a girl. Do you think there is any hope to him not being so manwhorish if he maybe finds the right one? He said he wants a girlfriend but the right girl. I just dont know whether I would want to be another one of his casual hook-ups because ive never dated/hooked up with a guy so should i give him a chance? Are there some good/bad signs i should look for? (link)
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I'm not going to give you signs, I'm only going to say that never give a guy like this his terms. If you really think this guy is worth going for, do it on your terms.
Tell him you would be interested in going out with him and getting to know him, but you guaranty there will be no sex and you stick to it, see what he tries, if he does not heed your warning and tries to get you to have sex, drop him then and there, no exceptions.
Stay in touch.
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18 years old, female :)
well i've liked this guy for the LONGEST time. like three and a half years. but we're also best friends. so me and him always denied liking each other. and i know he is attracted to me but didn't do anything about it and same for me. but recently i've let him know i like him. i havent told him exactly "i like you" but we've been messing around (nothing really sexual) and flirting non stop when i see him, i'll sit in his lap and he will hold me. and well now i feel like i made a mistake. because he will text me like two days straight after i hang out with him (i usually only see him sometimes on the weekends) and then he won't text me all week, even sometimes he will be like i'll text you tomorrow and he won't. i feel like he now knows he can have me, and that i'll always have feelings for him so he doesn't have to try as hard. i don't text people first, everyone knows that. but it's just heartbreaking. it's like he knows he can control me. i don't know if you want to say control exactly but he knows he can have me when he wants. i try to make myself seem "unavailable" like he'll want to hangout on friday and i'll be like im with my friends! and i will be like lets hang out tomorrow. why do i feel like this? i feel so sad, and confused. what should i do? i don't want to drift apart from him, so i don't really want to ignore him. i've tried playing hard to get. i'm just stuck. (link)
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Wow, talk about mixed signals, sounds like you got this guy not knowing whether he's coming or going. Are you sure your 18, because this sounds more like 15 or 16.
The most troublesome thing here is, best friends is the strongest position to start from in a male female relationship, but must be approached with care. You want to go to the next step, but not take three steps at a time. Frankly, you sound like you want to jump to the next landing and go straight from best friends to sexual partners, big mistake by the way.
Stop with the mixed signals and the games and tell him you would like to go out with him. Tell him you think your feelings for him go deeper then just friends and if he feels the same, you'd like to find out where it goes. Don't commit to each other right away, just date a few times and see how it feels. If a first kiss comes along someday, see how it feels. Take the steps from first date to passion, don't let your libido talk you into jumping to the next landing, trust me, you'll be glad you did.
Don't argue about the losing a friend crap with me either, if you feel this way, it's the chance you must take. Better to lose a best friend then to regret never trying, he could be the one you spend the rest of your life with, but then again, he might not be, but don't look back in ten years regretting that you didn't try.
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how do you tell someone that theyre your first kiss and first boyfriend ? it juss seems awkward. should you tell them before you kiss them that you havnt kissed anyone or afterwards? (link)
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Don't tell them, if you marry them, you can tell them then. Your first kiss is for you.
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if you have a warrant out for your arrest. and you dont go to jail, what does that mean?
can they show up to your work? (link)
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Where ever they find you, in your car, your home, your work, where ever. They will cuff you, frisk you and take you to jail. Tell me, do you want this happening to you on the interstate where your car will be impounded and you'll have to pay to get it out, or in front of your co-workers? You have a better choice, go down and get it taken care of on your own two feet. Not dragged in, have some respect for yourself.
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i'm a female and i've been dating this amazing guy since late early august, which would make it four months. he is is a really great guy and he treats me like a queen. He is alwayz telling me how amazing i am and how much he loves being with me. Its great you know since i've never really been in a relationship that had someone treat me so well. He was the first to say i love you and i was surprised by that. He is a very sensative man. very sensative. But here is the deal we've only been dating four months and he's talking about marrage and children. I was so spastic in the situation and so completly vunerable at the moment that i agreed to it all. but now that im begining to think aobut everything. i think its moving way to fast. Don't get me wrong i love him to death but i'm not in love with him yet. i don't want to ruin things by moving things to fast. i know i have to say something but with hime being so sensative i don't know how to break it to him without crushing him (link)
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I'm a 49 year old married man and I take issue with a guy who is talking marriage and children after 4 months. I realize that is not something your saying in your letter, but it should be. I've always said, "loving people is easy, it's liking them that takes time". I don't want to correct you, but it seems to me that that is what you are saying, you like him, but your not sure whether that the degree that you like him is strong enough yet and I ask, should it be?
Four months is not enough time to get to the guts of another person, much less into their heads. It's very important that you know the person your going to marry thinks the same way you do in many ways. How are you going to raise your children, are you going to raise them yourselves, or let someone else do it, (day care). Will they go to church and which one, are just a few of the question you need to know.
You also need to know, does he just give lip service, or do they back up their words in their deeds. This kind of thing is rarely seen in a 4 month period, when the couple is still on their best behavior. It is seen only when you become comfortable with each other.
You know, your question about how to tell him is seen so often. People are so worried about hurting other people's feelings. I have to ask, how strong can a relationship be if you can't be honest with each other? So I will tell you how to start it off.
Tell him you don't want to start out what could be a life long relationship being anything but honest, even if it means hurt feelings. Both of you have to be sure that this is the one that lasts a life time and that means taking the time to make sure that you really know each other and that takes more then 4 months. Courtship is a lengthy process and you want to make sure that the two of you are capable of becoming one in mind and body, because if you can't, you don't want to be at odds with him the rest of his life. This can not be forced, only time will reveal if your spirits can become intertwined and survive the tribulations to come. So let us not talk of a future yet to be seen, let's see if we can become best friends on our journey together, then we will speak of marriage and all that will come with it.
How's that?
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I had a really bad day..my mom took me to the doctor and i was barely told that the shot i was taking was Gardasil. I told my mom about the bad things i'd heard about it but she wouldn't listen to me! She asked the doctors and of course they told us that the media was lying to me. When i got in the nurses room, i seriously began to cry. There was some old bitch there telling me that later in life i'll thank my mom, whatever, I googled it and i read there are serious issues with the vaccine.
http://ppjg.wordpress.com/2008/04/24/whats-in-your-gardasil/
Really? How bad is this? I also read it was FDA approved and other good crap about it so now i'm kind of feeling guilty of what i told my mom, but i'm just really confused and really concern with my health. My arm has been hurting where i got the shot but apparently thats natural.. (link)
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You know, I am less bothered by the shot, then the thought that you had no say in it. I am a 49 year old father and I tend not to automatically side with a child, but when it comes to decisions about that child's body, I have to side with the right of a child to make an informed decision as well.
I find it interesting how so many people will be up in arms over a female of any age who wants an abortion and the people who want to stop that right, but then will take that right away when it comes to vaccinations, or other medications that have not truly seen the test of time. This drug is fairly new and no matter the studies, you don't really know what it may do 10 or 20 years down the line.
I don't say this to worry you, odds are, it will have no adverse effect on you, but really people, parents will do anything if they think there child's life is threatened, I argue that in most cases, they are too emotionally involved to make that decision with out the child being fully informed and in agreement.
You will probably never get your parents to agree with me, but I hope there are others out there that will consider the rights of their child and realize that the FDA has been wrong before.
Sweetheart, please don't worry about the shot, instead, remember how having your rights taken from you feels. Your parents are doing what they feel is right, they are just going about it the wrong way.
I will not forget you and your letter and I will think my best thoughts for you everyday and ask that the angels watch over you always.
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i like this boy and i know he likes me, i want to know how to get on the subject of dating without seeming obvious or anything. like ways to bring it up in a conversationn..
also i want to stand out from all the other girls is there anyways to do that (link)
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Please, just ask him to a movie or something. There is nothing more flattering for a guy then to be asked to go out, leave the second time to him.
The one thing that most girls, or women for that matter, don't seem to understand is that it's not like it use to be. Men/boys are not as comfortable asking girls out, thank the feminist movement for that. The control has been given over to the female now, we can't even ask a girl out these days more then once, with out being labeled a "stalker".
It was hard enough to get up the courage to ask out a girl when it was up to the guy to start it, now we need to worry about political correctness, no is no and how many time can we ask you out before we find ourselves in jail. Do him a favor, just ask him out.
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So i'm a 17 year old girl. nothing special. but since july ish i've been having this feeling of being alone. i can't talk to my best friend about it because he's always like "i'm here for you" even though he goes to college and i'm still in high school, and he really doesn't understand what i mean. i mean alone, like, i feel like i don't belong anywhere. i'm single so i don't have a bf to talk to, my ex best friend and i are in a fight because we're not always on the same page, and she's so touchy about everything i say. i feel like all my friends are moving on with their lives, while i'm still stuck here not knowing what to do with myself. i want something new in life but i can't seem to find it. i haven't been to a doctor because i don't have one and i know i might have anxiety. my mom had depression so i don't know if that's rubbed off on me or not, but i keep getting this recurring feeling of being disconnected from the world. i've tried doing things to stay away from people, like read and go to the library during school, but nothing feels right anymore. am i mental or is there an explanation for this?? (link)
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Sweetheart,
I'm not sure why everyone jumps on the depression wagon all the time, when I was 17 it was not the first word spoken. You know what they called it? They called it sole searching, finding oneself. We all have the need to look inside of ourselves, but you know why it's depression these day's? The drug companies don't have a pill to sell you for sole searching, when they do, they'll go back to calling it that.
You are 17, you are suppose to be doing this, spending time alone with your thoughts is a good thing, don't let them convince you otherwise. We are not meant to be happy all the time, so don't fall into that. We are meant to feel all the feeling we have and we are meant to learn to cope with them. Should this get to a debilitating stage, where you can not function, you probably have let it go too far. So if it gets to the point where you feel it is getting in the way of you living your life, seek help then. But until then, do what you want to do, you want to be alone, be alone, for some reason your mind wants this, find out why. Please consider reading my column, you'd be surprised how often this question is asked in one way or another. There are other things there that may help you too.
be well good miss
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I have always wondered exactly what religious/spiritual catagory I fall into. I believe in a higher being but I do not believe in organized religion. Where would I fall? (link)
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You can not be categorized with this simple statement, but then why would you want too? I know there is a higher power, but believe that all organized religions have been corrupted in one way or the other. I consider myself to be a spiritualist and I don't think that my god is as stupid as most religions seem to feel theirs is. I know my god would not continue to forgive my sins just because I went to church every Sunday and asked for forgiveness. Many people do this and then Monday go out and commit the same sin. But, as long as you go and continue to drop money in the collection plate, the preacher will continue to preach that you are forgiven.
Now don't get me wrong and start yelling at me, because you are not one of these people that do this and you attend your church faithfully for guidance. People need to believe what they believe to get through life, so if your church and your belief help you get through life, then more power to you.
As a spiritualist, I know your strength comes from the spirit with in. It is that spirit that connects us all to each other and to god, once you know that connection, you know god and you know that stupid is not one of gods traits.
You must find god your own way, you have the start, find the commonalities dear spirit, you'll get there, then what you call yourself wont matter.
Be well
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firstly i'm 17 and im a guy.
Well, I went out with a girl about a year ago (october 2007). She was the perfect girl for me i swear. After 25 days she decided to end the relationship with me. I couldn't take it at all. Then a few months went on and she started going out with another guy, damn I was heartbroken, I couldn't get over her no matter what. Then after a while I THOUGHT I got over her, and then she became my really close friend, and all the feelings came back. One day I just couldn't keep it in and I told her how I felt, she never felt the same way. It felt good to let it out, but now, I'm still thinking I'm in love with her. Again, she's going out with someone now. She's still my close friend, but everytime I talk to her I feel the pain, but I don't want to lose my friendship with her by making things even more awkward. Please help soon!.
Thanks a lot! (link)
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I should leave you to find out for yourself, but you can not be friends with some one you are in love with, not at your age. At any stage in life it is precarious, at some stages it is down right dangerous. There is an old saying, "If you love something, set it free, it is comes back to you it is yours, if it doesn't it never was." I've loved several girls in my life and I'm not going to lie, you never forget them, but you will find the one that loves you back as much as you love her.
Stop seeing her on any level, not a phone call, or even a letter. Your wasting your time and hers, remember, the female always hold all the cards, all you can do is put yourself out there, if she says no, move on.
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