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April 28, 2014

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i have been with my boyfriend for almost a year but im starting to have major feelings for an ex boyfriend. i know its very bad of me but my boyfriend now just isnt making me happy anymore and i dont know what to do. my boyfriend lies to me about everything so im to the point i dont know whats real and whats a lie. hes lied about smoking (twice), going to a party, going to school, and to as stupid as how much he spends on something. i just dont understand. he tells me hell change but hes said that since day one and it continues. also on two occasions he didnt go to school once i found an earring and the other time i found an ankle bracelet. i asked whose it was and he told me he didnt know. i told him i thought he was cheating on me and he got all mad and said he wasnt. im just not happy anymore. i love him to death though. but my ex boyfriend and me have been talking the past 3 days and im not sure whats gonna happen but hes making me so happy. ive been smiling nonstop and hes making me feel whole i talked to him yesterday from 1:30 pm all the way til 5 am nonstop. on the internet and phone. i just dont know what to do. i dont want to hurt my boyfriend but in the same sense im not happy. but i dont wanna rush it with my ex boyfriend either. please help me

First off I have to warn you I am not in my field when it comes with relationship questions. Also my ethical beliefs are rather strict, so my answer will be strongly influenced by this. Keep this in mind when you assess my advice.

First of all, one should never tolerate a liar. It doesnt really matter why they lied, it doesnt really matter what intentions they had, the fact that a person is willing to deceive makes them untrustworthy. Now, you say he lies to you about many things... thats even worse. Even if the ex- boyfriend was not in the picture my advice would be to leave him. You need to be with a person you can trust, its as simple as that.

Now, you say that your ex boyfriend makes you feel happier but you dont want to rush it. Thats fair enough. However you should end it with your current boyfriend or else you too will fall under the same category. This will sound cruel, but dont worry about his feelings. I am not insensitive (really), but the way I figure it, he gave up that privilige when he began to lie to you.

Go with what makes you happy. You have no obligations, you have not cheated on anyone, and you are not happy where you are now.

Good luck.

My friends all get sick of me complaining about being fat and they say im not at all fat i just probebly would feel better about myself if i toned my stomach and leg mussels can you tell me any exersizes i could do to help and for how long each day.
Thank you

Ok, first of all heres a link:

http://www.bodybuilding.com/fun/exercises.htm

Click on the muscles you are interested in and you will get a lot of examples. I have not gathered from your question if you meant exercises you can do at home (without weights) only, or if you have access to a gym. I will try to find examples of both.

1 With Barbells or Dumbbells
Nothing, I repeat nothing, can match the squat (in the link its after you click quads and its called the "barbell full squat).

Lunges are also good (under hamstrings or quads, check out "dumbbell lunges"). Depending on how strong you are, you might be able to get something out of doing them even without weights... just add more reps.

Normally I would say something like Romanian deadlifts for the hamstrings but since you arent a regular gym person it might be safer to go for something like the lying leg curls.

2. No Weights
Under quadriceps check out the freehand jump squat. I cant say that I have ever tried it, but it looks interesting and i think it could be effective.

For hamstrings check out the flutter kicks. They
are pretty straight forward.

There are also a number of glute exercises that dont require weights if you need any of those.

As for reps, if you do weights I would start off with 2 or 3 sets of 8-12 reps not done to failure. This would be for the first month or two while you figure out the technique and condition your muscles.

If you dont have weights it becomes a little harder to regulate reps. Try 2 to 4 sets of 15-20 reps per exercise (you will soon see which need a few more and which need a few less reps). Take about one and a half minutes break between sets.

As for the abs, do crunches. There are a number of variants shown on the site. Do 3 sets of 12-15. If they get too light you can add more reps, although I would prefer to use a weight (held on your chest or behind your head). Alternatively you can add another exercise from the list if you dont feel you are getting a proper workout.

Ok I think thats pretty much it. Oh, as for how often to do them, I would say try train each body part twice a week since you have a pretty light load. So for example do your routine Mondays and Thursdays. In the meantime you can also add some cardio which would also help you out (running, stair climbing, rope jumping and so on).

Good luck.

ok so im invited to my friends costume party but we have to dress in pairs so.. my friend was gonna go with her bf as catwoman and batman but they broke up so now im gonna go with her. but she already bought her catwoman costume and she doesnt wanna waste it so i dont no what to dress as.. i dont want it to be like really stupid so ya...im 13f.. thanks

Go as batgirl. In one story line they were arch enemies.
There was a "batwoman" in the comic books apparently, but she did not feature for too long. Also I dont know if she had anything directly to do with catwoman.

who is chuck norris

Before Walker Texas Ranger, Chuck Norris was a movie star believe it or not. He made movies with Bruce Lee in his early days and then a few other action films. Now thats back from when I was a kid- also known as "the good old days" :)

Now, going further back Chuck was one of the most prominent marial artists (which I guess is why he became a movie star). He was world champion in karate many times and, in the 80s, everyone knew who this guy was.

He has also diversified his martial arts. I know he did Taekwondo, also he trained Ju-jitsu with Royce Gracie (the original and most famous UFC competitor).

To me, you asking this question is living proof that I am aging lol. Twenty years ago even primitive tribes living secluded in the jungles of Brazil would have known who this guy was. Oh well time flies...

How many associate's degrees would it take to look as impressive/qualified as a person with a bachelor's degree? How many bachelor's degrees would it take to look as impressive/qualified as a person with a master's degree?

Obviously a person with 20 associate's degrees looks more educated and impressive than someone with 1 bachelor's degree, but where can you draw the line? (3 associates=1 bachelor's, 4 associate's=1 bachelor's, etc.)

I definitely agree with the others. Apart from that someone who took 20 associate or bachelor degrees looks indecisive, he also does not posses the same level of expertise within a given field when compared to a master's degree.

If you take a business degree for example (since I know something about this), what you usually learn in your bachelors is essentially a bit of everything. You get some marketing, accounting, finance, strategy etc. In the masters you choose your focus and go very much into depth on that.

The only time I can think of where multiple lower level degrees would be an advantage is when the job has very different sets of requirements. However, even then one needs a certain match between the degrees (i.e. to fulfil a certain purpose), so it still does not boil down to simple numbers. For example I have known engineers who have chosen to take business degrees to supplement their education.

Also the person below is right. Usually its your highest degree that counts. Often it is also the only one listed after your name on things like business cards.

what do you do when someone you know is being peer pressured?

This is a really tough question. I have been giving it some thought since you put it in my inbox, and I must say I am no closer to any great revelation. The only options I can think of is:
1 Talk to the person
2 Talk to a parent or counselor (assuming this is a minor we are talking about)
3 Confront the people doing the peer pressure.

Starting with 1. You have to be really careful here. The person is probably in denial and will react defensively. You have to handle this with a soft touch.

The parent or counselor thing is always an option particularly if the behaviour is very self destructive. If it is, I would defintaly do it for the person's sake.

As for 3, this one depends on who they are and how able you are to handle the conflict. I only listed it because in the single experience I have with peer pressure thats how i handled it. A friend was being pressured (to hard drugs) by someone i knew. I handled it by confronting the person and telling him in no uncertain terms that he would have hell to pay if he did it again. This works much better if you have a 2-1 weight advantage...

Anyway, I know these options are rather straight forward and Im sorry I couldnt be of more help. This is not an area I have much experience with. Best of luck.

I'm on antibiotics for a sinus infection... can I still smoke? I know I can't drink but yeah.. I'm just wondering and you don't have to answer if it will go against the rules but I'd really like to know before I do. thanks.

To my knowledge, you can.

Me and my boyfirnd been going out for few months-he keeps saying he doesnt want to get serious-but i think i am falling for him.Don't know what to do

A relationship can turn out pretty badly if both parties dont have the same expectations. If you continue dating this guy, and if you continue to fall for him, you are in for a serious amount of pain later on. There might of course be the chance that he starts to have the same feelings, but that is by no means guaranteed.

So, talk to him, explain what is going on. If he really doesnt want to have more that what you have now, then you should move on. It will be better for you to do this now than in half a year (when you will be totally hearbroken at the thought of him going out with another girl).

Mind you, Im no expert in such things, but I really think you should look to the future and imagine where you will be a few months or a year down the line.

Good luck.

can i loose weight by not eating but one time a day or not eating at all or will that make me sick i really wanna loose 20 pounds by november plzzzzzz help me give me some advice?

Well everyone pretty much underlined that this is not the way to do it. They are of course perfectly right. The problem with starvation mode is that your metabolism slows, you digest muscle ahead of fat, and when you start eating again the weight will pile on (in fat).

Steady, healthy, maintainable weight loss should be at about 1 to 2 pounds a week.

Exercise is great. Best types are probably weight training and cardio (such as on alternating days for example).

In short, you need to eat often (4-6 times a day), you need to eat balanced meals, you need to divide your calories roughly equally between these meals (a bit more before exercise, a bit less after) and you need to eat healthy. Your total calories should be about 500 or so below what you burn.

For a more detailed look at how to lose weight, what to eat, etc here is a link to one of my previous answers (hope you dont mind, but I have answered this question many times before):

http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=447735

For my englihsh class we have to make 10 comparisons of celebrities.

An example: Will Ferrel is as tall as Vince Vaghun.

That basically means I need 20 celebrities, in pairs of what they have alike.

So far I have,

1. Marilyn Monroe is as talented as James Dean.
2. Jessica Simpson is as blonde as Christina Aguilera.
3. Jeff Corwin likes crocodiles as much as Steve Irwin.
4. Jim Carrey is as funny as Robin Williams.

Can anyone help me think of more pairs of celebrities that have things in common?? THANK YOU! :]

William Shatner is as revered as Patrick Stewart
Drew Carey is as plump as Jim Belushi
Sean Connery is as bald as Hulk Hogan
Ryan Stiles is as goofy as Colin Mochrie
Brad Pitt is as handsome as George Clooney
George Michael is as gay as Elton John (lol better not use this one)

ohkay well my computer is really slow and shuts down after being on for an hour. but it has a lot of free space... i no i have a viris.. from limewire..what is a extremely good viris dector that finds every viris... no im not going to go get my computer fixed.. and do you no if there is anything better then limewire to put on my mp3 player? thanks

Ok, the best antivirus i have ever come accross is F- Secure. They provide a firewall and anti virus, and they have won every award under the sun pretty much. The good news is that they give you a 6 months free trial (for the anti virus only). Also, the program comes with built in anti spyware, so you should not need programs like spybot or adaware. Heres a link:

http://www.f-secure.com/

Click on "try" and fill out their info.

Otherwise a good free antivirus is avast. In case you need it heres a link to them too:

http://www.avast.com/eng/download-avast-home.html

does anybody know how to tell if somebodys lieing?

Thing is right, one can find these basic tips on the net (which i believe the other columnists have given you below), but they can lead you in the wrong direction sometimes.

While some people may look away when they lie, others might do so when they are trying to recall a fact (just to give one example). I am not saying that those guidelines are all wrong. The important thing when trying to figure out when someone is lying is spotting a change in their behaviour. If, for example, a person tends to maintain eye contact a lot and then suddenly starts looking away then you might have caught a liar.

I dont know if you have ever seen Derren Brown. He is goes around reading peoples minds and that sort of thing. Anyway, while a lot of his stuff can be a bit far out, he did a segment on lying that was very interesting imo. Anyway, heres a link to this segement:

http://www.channel4.com/entertainment/tv/microsites/M/mindcontrol/lying/index.html

You have 3 videos on the left where he determines when 3 people are lying. Kind of a fun exercise. On the right he explains what to look for. I think its a good read, hope it can help you out.

Do you think if A guy had sex with you [and used you]
must have liked you at one point?
Or thought you were pretty at least??

this didnt happen to me, i was wondering because it happend to my friend.

Hmmm, he might have liked the person. Though if he used her I tend towards that he didnt. It is more likely he though she was pretty, although that by no means is a given either. The guy could have just been really horny, and let me tell you, some guys will go to ANY lengths (i can emphasize "any" enough) to get off.

What is a good fast way to gain muscle mass?

If you want muscle mass, nothing at all compares to doing weights.

Now, within weight training there are also different paths to take. If you are interested in pure bulk and pump, then you need a bodybuilder program. If you are interested in raw strength, then you want something involving some powerlifting routines. The regular gym goes usually does something in between, and of course, different bodies respond better to different programs.

I dont know how specific you want this, but the raw answer to your question is weights. With this also follows proper diet and rest. Really those three I like to look at as a 3 legged stool. Remove one and they all crumble down.

So... weights, followed by a diet rich on protein and with a calorie surplus (spread over 6 meals or so during the day... you are looking at tons of chicken, turkey, cottage cheese, tuna, eggs or egg whites, lean meats, whey protein etc.- to mention only the protein sources), and plenty of rest (minimum 8 hours, preferably more).

If you want anything more specific just drop me a line.

Best of luck.

Is it better to do dungbell curls or machines and what are the advantages or each. I do machines like bicep curls, shoulder press, chest press, push downs, and things like that.

Freeweights over machines imo. The problem with machines is that they dont hit all the supporting muscles that are involved in a lift. When you do barbells and even more so, dumbbells, all the stabilizer muscles are used to control the weight as it moves (a machine moves along a fixed trajectory).

This also gives you strength you can actually use. Think about it, if you lift something, e.g. furniture, or push something, you are using several muscle groups at once. Never in "real life" are you going to perform a movement that is simulated by a machine.

This is also why, apart from doing freeweights over machines, one is advised to use a lot of compound (as opposed to isolation) exercises as well. Compounds use multiple joint movements. Things like squats, deadlifts, romanian deadlifts, benching, military press etc.

Finally the other problem with machines and isolation exercises is that they can easily lead to overtraining a muscle.

You also asked for advantages... well as far as I know, isolation and machince work should really only be used by more advanced lifters as a way to target muscles that are lagging behind. Generally you will see a bit more isolation work performed by bodybuilders (who do it for appearance and pump) and less so by powerlifters and olympic lifters (who do it for pure strength).

Anyway, in pretty much everything i have read, they seem to advise that one bases ones workout around free weight compound lifts. So I would recommend you keep the other things to a minimum.

Im going to try crack or coke with my friend in a couple days for the first time so my question is, if i only do it once, what can happen? Can i form an addiction right away? Whats worse crack or coke? I'm going to try the one thats less harmful on my body. People with experience plz help. so far ive drank alcohol, smoked pot and cigarettes, and taken speed. So i know what its like to be high and drunk or whatever. pls advice ppl. thanks

The answers below already covered what can happen, and they were perfectly correct. Yes you can form an addiction the first time, although the chances are greater with frequent use of the drug. I have a pretty good idea which one is less harmful, but I will not share that info in the hope that you will think twice.

You know, the real question is why are you doing those things? What lack in your life is causing you to seek out these "thrills", at the expense of your own safety? Messing around with hard drugs is really really reckless. Even if the drugs themselves dont get you, keep in mind that because they are illegal there is no one to control how they are produced. Thats why (as mentioned below) you can get all sorts of other dangerous stuff along with them. Why would you expose yourself to this risk?

Anyway, I hope you reconsider. Also seriously try and notice the pattern in what you are doing, and where this might lead you a few years down the line.

I am not an attractive guy. But it's my personality that gets people. My bestfriend ( a girl) is gorgeous, she's just overweight, not by much, but still. I have liked her for 1 year now, and I don't know what to do. She is very popular, but a sweetheart to everyone. I'm scared she won't want to go out with be/I'll be rejected. Should I take a chance?

I dont want to sound pessimistic here, because I think you probably have a good chance and all that. However, you should take a few things into account just to keep things in perspective...

1- Your friendship will probably (not certainly, but very likely) never be the same again. In the very least it will be strained for a while.

2- Plenty of girls really do go for looks as the main thing. Have a look at her past boyfriends and crushes and so on. Truly, I have heard this whole "looks dont matter" crap from girls who wouldnt go within 10 feet of an average looking guy. Look at her actions not her words. If a girl is dating the partially illiterate captain of the football team and lists "intelligence, personality and humour" as the main things she looks for in a guy... well you get the idea. Again, Im just trying to be realistic here. Assess the situation as best you can.

Now, if you ask me, I would also agree with the general thing the others said. You should probably take the chance. You do have a slight advantage that you are already her friend. However, make sure that you know exactly what you are getting into, and make sure that you have a proper idea of the risks you are taking. Come to think of it lol, this is a good way to approach any problem in life.

Good luck

Oh, if you do ask her, could you let us know how it went? (add extra info or feedback or something)

Whats the percent of if you get high with someone you have sex?

Generally I agree with the answer below. However, high on what? If you mean weed then the chance is 0% unless you were going to sleep with them anyway. No way does weed hamper your judgment in that way.

Now if you meant other drugs then that might change the percentage a bit. However, as far as I have seen, it would still be pretty low for most of them.

You would have a better chance of making a blunder like that drunk rather than high.

What do you do if you fall in love with your best friend, and can't tell them?

Your options are (and I speak from experience):

- Suffer and live with it. It may eventually go away... or it may not.

- Tell them anyway and see what happens. It could ruin the friendship though.

- Cut or limit contact with the person for a while at least. Just to give you time to get over it (it should be at least a couple of months imo)

Those are the options. If you get another girlfriend/boyfriend then it might make things pass easier. However Im not going to lie to you, things are really going to suck for a quite some time irrespective of what you do.

Good luck.

21/f. 120 lb and 5'4. how much vodka would it take to get a person my size drunk?

Very hard to answer that. People react very differently to alcohol. Size can help, but its not really a good indicator.

Anyway, if you are "average" in tolerance for a girl your weight, and if you have no experience drinking (which I gather from this question), then the answer is... not very much at all. I would say probably no more than 15 cl or so (0.34 oz if i converted it right).

Of course, it really also depends on how fast you drink it, what you mean by "drunk", and how long its supposed to last. Not a good idea to drink too fast btw.

Well, sry this was a bit vague, but unfortunately drinking dosages are generally determined through trial and error...

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