I'm a 17 year old girl who has had her share of problems. So I'll do my best to answer questions and you can leave a question anytime in my inbox. :)
Gender: Female
Age: 17
Member Since: October 31, 2010
Answers: 211
Last Update: January 5, 2012
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bewise
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I have a crush on this boy. But every time I sit beside him, he doesn't talk to me. He talks to the person beside him, the one behind him, the one in front of him, anyone except me. The only thing that makes me feel like I exist is when I saw him look at me. (link)
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Well there could be lots of reasons why he doesn't talk to you.
Maybe he just doesn't feel like he knows you well enough to talk to you or he's extremely shy or something.
Maybe try finding little things to bring up. Like, something that will grab his attention. If it starts off small, it could get bigger to where you guys would talk more.
Just be friendly and he'll come around.
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so there are these two guys i've been friends with for a few yrs now, and there my best guy friends. for both relationships it started out as a friendship and still is...but latley i've been noticing that whenever another girl talks to them i get jealous and mad, and get realy excited when they wanna sit with me. the problem is...their both ex-bfs of 2 popular girls. one of them im friends with and sit at lunch with, the other i used to be friends with, but she doesnt sit with us. as it is, those two girls are very good friends (not bffs but goof friends) i know the one i used to be friends with would act like she doesnt care but would make a big deal about it by crying, they broke up last winter, their still friends, but i dont think he has the same connection with her. but then again if im not friends with her why do i care? the other guy is so nice like the other and good looking, but i dont know how my friend would be about it...since they went out several times, but havent dated for a long time. back to the other guy he hasnt dated anyone since his ex..the girl im not friends with..especially with him it makes me mad that i can only be friends with him now becasue i dont just want to jump right into it. i think he likes me too, and im differnt in the way im not crazy loud like his ex was, and im just like the girl who talks about memories and crazy shit, theres just something more between us. i dont know what to do...obviously first i want to make sure im confident enough to persue this with the girl knowing, if i go out with the guy i like more which is the guy with the ex that im not friends. one because we have common intrests, low key, funny, friendly and humorous, and like each other...please help thank youuuu (link)
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Well, with the guy that you like more, forget his ex because you're not even friends with her and if she starts drama, that is her own problem and not yours.
Then with the other guy, you're friends with his ex, so if anything were to happen between the two of you, you should talk to her first.
Honestly, if you like these guys and they're good guys and great friends then do what you want.
I mean I know you want to spare people's feelings but the only ones you need to watch for is your friends. Other than that, what other people say or start drama about doesn't even matter because you'll be happier and they'll have no life but to talk about you.
Just work at it slowly and see where it goes.
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Hi Im Gracie and I'm 13! Remember me? No? That's okay. LOL :)
Anyway, I have a question about, like guys and dating and stuff. Kinda, 2 questions actually.
Well, Im 13 and he's 16.
Okay so my first question is, is it weird to date someone with the same name as your brother? His name is Matt and my brothes name is Matt. It's kinda awkward and my friends say some stuff like its gross and stuff and it's kinda embarrassing. What do you think?
My second question is, Do you think its wrong for us to date each other because he's older? I really, really like him and he says that he likes me too but he doesnt want his friends to know we're dating because they're gonna say stupid stuff about it because he's older and everything. I mean, I don't see the bid deal and it kinda hurts my feelings a little. He wants to keep it a secret that we're dating. It kinda makes me feel like he's ashamed of me or something. Maybe Im just being over sensitive?
But I like him alot, maybe even love him a little and I dont want to keep us a secret. I told my bestfriend Natalie that we were dating now and Matt (My boyfriend not my brother) found out and he got really mad and he hit me. I get why he was mad. He's popular, and has lots of friends and tons of girls that wish they could be his girlfriend and he gets mad when his frinds say stuff about him hanging out with me. It makes him upset. Its just that I've like him for a long time and I've alwaysed wish he would like me back and date me. I dont want to hide it from everybody. What if other girls start flirting with him because they dont know he's dating me?
Am I being stupid?
(FYI- We're in the same grade. I skipped a few grades. Im the youngest kid at my high school. Im a sophomore.) (link)
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Ok well it's not weird to date someone with the same name as your brother. Your friends are just immature if they think that way lol.
It's not wrong to date him because he's older. That wouldn't be the problem in this relationship.
I wouldn't date a guy who would have to keep me a secret because he couldn't take the crap his friends gave him. It's ok that it hurts your feelings because honestly, it should. It should hurt if your boyfriend is hiding you and even gets upset when you tell your best friend. The relationship won't go anywhere unless he stands up for you.
Hitting is definitely not a good thing, which is why I doubt this whole relationship.
I think you should find someone else you will treat you better. Hitting and keeping secrets isn't a good way to start a relationship. You deserve to be happier with someone else.
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Ever since I was little I've had the worst experiences in church I was always badly judged because of my past mistakes and because my father made bad mistakes to I tried soo many churches but it was all the same. I've greatly improved and I've devoted my life to God and doing my best to please him but I get so scared I don't want to go near any churchs so I don't know what to really do. Anyone know what I can do? (link)
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You're still a good Christian. I guess the churches you went to just weren't the best for you. Everybody makes mistakes and those people in those churches might have made worse mistakes than you have.
God still loves you no matter what mistakes you make.
People judge you wherever you go but don't let them get you down because you're doing so much better now.
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help!!! my brother's friends' who are 12-13 said a guy at school was going to ask me out, and i dont know for sure if i like him, what do i say? (link)
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Well first figure out if you like him. If he asks you out, tell him you need a little time.
Then you can just go from there and see how you feel.
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I'm 13/f,and have a crush on my friend who's 17/m.He went out with my bestfriend Chloe,and when he broke up with her,she was devistated.She became sick all the time,and depressed.She didn't get over him,until she found another boyfriend last week.
I really like my bestfriend,but I don't know if I should ask him out,after that happened between him and Chloe.Chloe was asleep for a total of 3 weeks.And I don't wanna ruin me and Chloe's friendship.And then,I also don't know if he'd go out with me,because when I told him I date older guys,he said that could be dangerous.And I even drop hints.I tell him he's cute,and he laughs and says thanks.Shouldn't that let him know something?Should I ask him out,or shouldn't I? (link)
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It kinda depends on what you value more. Your friendship with your best friend or the relationship with your other friend?
She might be over him but it'd still probably bug her if you guys started dating.
If you still want to go through with it, then talk to her about it and let her know that you do like her ex.
If you don't know if he likes you or not, you should talk to him too and see how that goes first before you figure out if you're gonna date him or not.
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my bf want s sex i'm12 year old girl and he's 16 i'm not ready he would touch me and kiss my kneck. I would say stop but would say babe relax. i say stop he says ok but he always bugs me about sex and once he tried to take off my shirt. i love him but not sexually. what should i do?
(link)
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Well it's good that you keep saying no. But he's not getting it. I've been in a situation where the guy would always bug me about sex or doing other things besides sex. I didn't want that, I liked him but I didn't want to do anything sexually. At one point, he almost went too far and pretty much scarred me for life. I'm not saying that it's going to happen to you, but it could.
Just let him go. You're not ready for what he wants and you're not gonna be happy if he keeps doing this.
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The thing is I really like this guy , I propably love him . He is my sister's best friend , my best friend's brother and 8 years older than me . And , oh yeah , he has a girlfriend ( like those weren't enough -.- ). Anyway , my best friend says it is not a problem for her. In fact she said that she doesn't like her brother's girlfriend .
This guy is the most impossible-to-be guy . He is totally lovable . Even his name says "Beloved" . So , i need some advice because I think i don't have the maturity to be his closest friend . I talk to him and he says I'm funny and beautiful , but it doesn't seem like he's interessted in me ... (link)
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It's ok to like him but he has a girlfriend. The way you're looking at it is, "I like him, so forget the other girl. I want him." But what if you were his girlfriend? You wouldn't want some other girl to come and try to take him away.
Just be his friend right now and be nice and friendly and if they do break up, then you can go for him. For right now, just be friends.
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17/F
I asked a few questions a while back about dealing with my overly shy boyfriend. Recap: He's super shy and he's a couple years younger, but he acts even older than I do sometimes. He knows when to be a kid and when to be an adult. Problem is, he doesn't seem to know how to act around me. He turns red and squirms when he has to kiss me or if he's sitting next to me on the couch.
And this is how I tried to solve it. I myself am shy, but I forced myself to overcome it today and invited him to a double date in town. I tried so hard to get him to talk and to order something to eat, but he wouldn't. He just smiled some of the time or laughs quietly as if he was stuck. I tried to urge a conversation about his job and about how life is, but he wouldn't go into it. I know guys draw the line at talking about certain things, so I avoided deep questions. Just normal questions. I really hate to say this, but I don't think this relationship is working out. And it's hurting me to even think about breaking up with him, but he won't discuss it. Should I just break up with him and ask to be friends or maybe keep trying? (He does seem to like me, but he's just too shy to do ANYTHING.) (link)
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Well that's the way he is and you can't really change a guy. He's not comfortable enough around you to talk and if it seems like it's not going anywhere then it'd be better if you guys broke up.
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I can't really say anything too negative about my life. I just don't want to be here honestly. Don't see a point. Please, i don't need anyone advising me that pushing through life is worth it. it's not. and no relgious comments either. thanks. (link)
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You should already know that no one on here can give that kind of advice. That'd be horrible.
There is always some reason to live, you just need to find it. Go talk to someone about it, in person. Life is hard and so many people have felt this way and have gone through so much. It's not like you're the only one and alot of them have made it through. Just try a little harder. It'll get better.
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Okay, a while ago i was cutting myself over some anxiety problems. No, i wasn't like, trying to kill myself or going for my wrists, it was alot milder than that to try and relieve myself of some distress. I've stopped now because i think it's stupid. Me and my boyfriend got into a really deep conversation and i decided to confide in him and confess what i was doing (dick move i know, am i trying to scare him away?? *sigh*) Anyway, he didn't seem to make a big deal out of it, and when we got into a conversation about it again, he said that he wasn't really checking to see if i was still doing it, and that he wasn't overly freaked out by it and that 'It's just that you have a problem, it's not your fault, it's not anyone's fault'. He is such a wonderful human being and i know that he cares about me and loves me. But because i'm a phsyco bitch, it makes me feel like he didn't really care about it. If someone had told me about it i would at least have discreetly sneaked a peek at their arm to see if there were any new marks. I love him and i just want to be happy with him, but does this mean he isn't really bothered by it? :( I realise i sound slightly attention seeking, but that's not why i told him, i just wanted his support.
Cheers x (link)
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I think your boyfriend does care about you. He might not know how to show it or doesn't show it the way you want him to.
Talk to him about it again and just ask if he cares. Don't yell at him or freak out or something. Just stay calm and just ask him honestly.
I think you were just looking for a different reaction than what he gave you, but don't over analyze it.
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14/f
Last night a boy that I've liked for 2+ years started texting me. We talked for 2 hours and then he asked me if I wanted to go to the Exhibition (like a fair, with rides and stuff) with him. I really wanted to, but I told him I was going to my cottage and couldn't. I don't think I'm allowed to even go on group dates, let alone one on one. He also asked me to a dance 2 years ago, but I didn't really like him then, and I said no.
The thing is, my family sort of knows about this boy, but not in the best way. I used to tell them stories about him, cause he is a bit crazy and nerdy, but sweet and cute at the same time. I kind of left the sweet and cute part out. I really want to ask my parents if I can go, and they aren't crazy overprotective so they might say yes. I just don't know if I can handle all my family (aunts, uncles, cousins, grandparents, sisters, and parents) and friends, with their opinions and ideas. What should I do? (link)
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If you want to go, then ask your parents. If you feel you're not ready to date then don't.
If you do ask your parents, don't freak out if they say no or something. They're just looking out for you.
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hey i'm the 12 year old girl with the 16 year old bf. alot my friends have really older boy friends.and they've had sex before. i'm really not sure what i should do? my friends are always talking abuot how they had sex. sometimes they would ask me if i've had sex with my bf and they know i'll say no. should i have sex with my bf? (link)
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It would not be a good idea at all. You'll probably regret having sex so young. I wasn't even thinking about sex when I was 12. Ignore your friends, they're just gonna screw up their lives having sex so early. Just wait till you're older and don't let your bf pressure you either.
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i have been with this same guy for over three years now,and we are good together.we have always had exciting sex life,and he says he loves me much,but the other nite,he told me he had sex wtother girl,4o5times,we started working on us,then he admited he was still seeing her.we r talking again,nd he swears no more lies,thathe is only wt me,but im hurt nd he dont understand y its so hard 4 me 2 believe in him again. can i ever get past this,o just walk away be 4 he hurts me again?? (link)
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You should walk away.
I mean, you guys were together for 3 years.
I don't know if he's gonna be honest from now on, he might be, but he might not be.
Even if you decided to give him another chance, all you'd be thinking is, "Can I trust him?" You don't want your whole relationship to be like that. It's just going to hurt you more.
Let him go.
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first im not going to say my age because I dont want to hear that im too young. but im older than 13.
anyway :
so I'm going to try and put this as short as possible. its going to be 2 years that I met this guy we'll call him M. well during the first year, the first couple of weeks I developed a huge crush on M. but I never went for him because he was well more popular than me and I was kind of a real big loser. so I knew he would never date me. anyway so my crush for him during the first year was huge! than well during the second year I became bestest friends with this girl name well S. and she out of no where started to like M. and they ended up dating ! I was definitely happy for both of them. and M's bestfriend T, I kinda liked him. specially because S told me to go for him and that he was flirting with me big time! turns out he was leading me on. anyway back to S and M.. but when she was dating him she always complained he was too shy and she broke things off after a week and a half! I was happy that they broke up because S was always complaining and she didn't give him time to open up. so I still had my huge crush on him, even when they dated. I told S that and she told me I could have him. so anyway I went to this party that my friend let's call her MK was throwing. anyway when I got out of the car they were all outside and M was there! during the party that night we flirted alot and well he had his first kiss that night while playing truth or dare. I was very jealous . anyway we had a strong connection and after that we would text and talk all the time. a month later we started to date, plus he asked me to go to semiformal with him at formal he bought me a rose, which to this day I still have. he has forsure been really shy with me but I never thought of breaking up with him! after 5 months he did eventually loosen up. in that 5 months we did get to know eachother very well. we've now been together 8 months in two days. but I'm worried.. I think we may be going to fast. and I know for a fact it's not his fault ! i thought about this awhile ago really even though we dated for 8 months I gave my first handjob, blowjob, he's fingered me, gave me hickies, played and sucked my boobs, and we had sex and I got on the pill all in 3 months now that I think about it ! do you think this is going fast? please help! thanks in advance (link)
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Well I wouldn't say you guys are going too fast. Just don't let him get caught up in the things you guys are doing. What I've learned is that when you're younger, the guys always get too caught up in the sex and the relationship is just based around that. That's not what you want.
I know that there are adult men who do that too but it happens alot with teenagers.
So anyway, I don't think you guys are going too fast but just watch yourself.
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My boyfriend and I have been together now for 3 months and I have never been more happier in my entire life. A while ago now he told me that he is in love with me and I told him that i have fallen in love with him too. My problem is though that I always feel a bit weird going up to him first at school. He always comes up to me when my friends are around but when he is with his friends I feel a bit nervous going up to him. Is this normal? I want the confidence to go up to him first. It's annoying because I should already have the confidence because I am in love with him... or do I just think I am? I think I do love him. Every time I think about my future I always picture him in it. I want to be with him forever and he wants to be with me forever too. But why can't I go up to him? I don't understand why it is so hard? (link)
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I had the same problem. You are his girlfriend so you are allowed to go up to him when his friends are around. It was a big problem for me for awhile until his friends started talking to me when I was around and I was cool with them.
Just forget about how nervous you are because your boyfriend is totally worth it.
I wouldn't know if you are in love with him or not. My last boyfriend told me he was in love with me when we were only together for 3 months too. Honestly, I thought it was really soon but who knows. I told him I loved him too but I wasn't sure if I was in love with him.
Like, I loved him as my boyfriend but I wasn't like full on in love with him yet.
So it could be possible or it might not be, but don't stress out about that and go with the flow.
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I feel like I've been chasing this guy that I've liked off and on for years. He says he likes me, but he likes someone else, or he says he'll take me on a date and that he's not interested in having a relationship right now because he's preparing to go on a mission, but then I find out that he IS in a relationship. Not to mention that he's LIED to me all these years. When I found out about his relationship, I wanted to call him and yell at him and ask him so many questions to why he lied to me again.
I have been thinking about this a lot, and I've come to a decision that I have got to stop chasing him, and just let him come to me if he has a problem. Am I doing the right thing? Thanks! (link)
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You are definitely doing the right thing. I totally get how you feel about this. Something similar happened to me and I held on for so long.
You definitely deserve someone better who won't lie to you and won't say he likes you but then just doesn't act like it anymore.
Find someone better because this guy is not worth your time.
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In past relationships I have been sexually abused, and hurt by them. I have met someone new and i have been single for 8 months and I feel that I am ready. I know for a fact he isn't going to hurt me because I want to be a police officer in the near future, and he graduates from the academy in november. He tells me I am beautiful, and cute, and smart. How do I keep myself from getting so caught up in the situation and falling too fast because I don't want to ruin this because of how i feel! (link)
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Well at least you're one of the girls who won't jump in too fast and fall too hard.
Well, because of your past, you're always going to have some trust issues. Remember that, and make sure he knows that you don't want to move too fast because it will most likely just ruin the relationship.
Just guard yourself, but not too much to where you're just scared to trust him at all or anything. Don't let yourself fall too hard, just watch what you do and take this whole thing slowly.
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I'm always crying and my eyes are usually swollen, I've had a rough year, constantly getting bullied. My teachers just pretended that they cared what was going on in my life. My face is usually greasy + pimply, and I have a crush on a guy who will probably never like me back. I hate being 12. (link)
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I was in a similar situation when I was 12. I think when I turned 12 things started going downhill for me. It happens to a lot of people, believe me. It doesn't have to be that way though. You're letting yourself feel this way.
The getting bullied thing is a totally different situation. You definitely need to talk to someone about it, someone you really trust. Friends aren't really the best to go to for this but maybe parents or other teachers, counselors, or any other adult that you trust.
With the acne, wash your face twice a day with some kind of acne wash. If that doesn't work then you can see a doctor and they do miracles with this kind of stuff.
You don't need to stress out over boys. Being 12 is hard enough. Having a crush is fine and it doesn't matter if he feels the same way or not. Guys cause way too much drama in a girls life anyway.
First get everything else figured out in your life, then you can stress out about boys.
It will all be fine. Good luck!
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So me and my boyfriend have been going out for a year now. When we first started dating he would say how he didnt deserve me and all this stuff. And here lately we have been getting in fights like everyday. He brings stuff up from the past about me when I hurt him when we werent even dating. He is 16 and I am almost 18 and im going to college in a couple months. I am starting to feel like he doesnt want to be around me because he never ask me to hang out then he gets mad when i tell him how i feel but thel he tells me not to keep things bottled up inside. When we hang out we dont really fight as much but I just dont know what to do. Everyone I have told my stories to say he is really insecure about himself. Everytime a guy talks to me he freaks and ask me why im talking to him so now if a guy even says hi to me i get worried beacause i dont mant my boyfriend getting mad. (link)
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This just might not be worth it. I mean, why would you want to spend time with someone who always fights with you?
Also, your past is your past. It needs to stay that way. You can't go back and change it so he needs to get over that.
You're going to college and I don't know if you're still gonna be around him but if not then it's going to be harder.
He's just being immature and not taking what you say seriously.
You should be with a guy who is thankful to have you and loves being with you and hanging out with you. Not someone who is always fighting or getting jealous of other guys who say hi to you.
He might be insecure, even if he is, it doesn't give him an excuse to act like this, you know?
If you want to work things out with him then talk to him. If that doesn't go through then you need to break it off and give him some time to grow up. You'll be fine through this. Good luck!
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