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What does exactly good listener means? example please? and how do you know if you're friend is a good listener? thank you =]

A good listener is essentially someone who pays attention to what you are saying. Basically someone who is a good listener should have the following qualities:
- They should not think about other things while you are talking
- They should not consider how to respond to what you are saying before you are done saying it
- They should have some level of genuine interest/ concern in regards to what you are telling the person
- When you are done speaking, they should respond to the best of their ability

Most people are pretty bad listeners actually. With some its really easy to spot. A few typical mistakes that give them away include:
- Starting to speak when you make a lengthier pause (even though you werent done)
- Changing the subject all of a sudden
- Interupting you (only exception here is if they interupted you to get something you said clarified)
- When you are done they respond poorely. e.g. only to part of what you said, or turning the subject to themselves in some way, etc.

Amongst my friends I have learned which ones can listen well and which cant. Usually the ones that cant begin thinking about something else while you are speaking. Without exception their facial expression changes, as does the way they are responding (with more monotonous "yes...yes...aha"). Be mindful of these things and you will soon be able to discern when someone is really paying attention.


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my computer has about 4000 viruses on it including Spyware and Malware. Please tell me any FREE antivirus software that i can download to SAVE my computer. Its has ALL my informations of it and i cant let it crash:(
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE i need help fast!

Ok, I think you can protect your computer for free. If not in the long term, then in the short term.

Possibly the best anti virus out there is something called F- secure. Last I checked they gave you a 6 month trial. Im not sure if thats still the case, but you still get a trial. Anyway here it is:
http://esd.element5.com/demoreg.html?productid=300109449&languageid=1

Like I said, these guys won just about every award under the sun for their product. It does both spyware and viruses, and also it has an effective active shield (i.e. stops them as they come in rather than after they infected your computer).

Otherwise, for perfectly effective and totally free solutions try:
Avast antivirus
Ad-aware personal edition

just google both.

Should be no problem to clean your machine

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Do guys shave down there usually or not? I want to know what to expect (not that im doing anything anytime soon. just curious)

I think it depends a little on the age of the guy. I would have normally answered "no". Recently however I have come across this rather (disturbing lol) realisation that some younger guys have started to. Personally there is no way in hell that a razor is going anywhere near that area. Not unless I have had an ample amount of beer anyway :)

Seriously though, if its a younger guy then "maybe", if he is a bit older then "not likely".

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hi i do masterbution daily.....i want to know are there any side effects? it is often said that excesive masterbution is bad.. i want to know is daily masturbtion considered to be in excess???

No it is not. You have nothing to worry about, irrespective of your age.

In any case, even excessive masturbation does not carry any side effects to the best of my knowledge. It may be caused by a psychological problem, which is why it can be considered bad. However it wont have any negative medical effects.

In any case, once daily is absolutely not excessive. Dont worry about it.

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im really out of shape

and getting chubby

can i lose weight by jumping rope half an hour everyday no matter how tired ill get?

Any exercise is good. Jumping rope, though its not something I have tried much, sounds like it could be pretty intensive.

However, whether or not you actually lose weight, irrespective of what kind of exercise you do, depends on your diet. So, if you get your eating habits in order, then I would say that jumping rope will certainly help.

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I'd like to lose a few pounds, mostly my love handles and lower tummy. I've already cut soda pop/junk food/ice cream/candy/fast food out of my diet. What excercises can I do that will target these areas and get rid of my love handles? And PLEASE tell me ones that you KNOW for SURE will work from personal experience, because I've already tried a lot of the things that people on here have said and they don't work. Thanks!

That is because no exercise will make you lose weight from your midsection or anywhere else. Fat cannot be spot reduced its as simple as that. You have the choice of losing weight overall, or accepting your body as it is.

If you choose to lose weight overall, eventually you will lose your love handles. Genetics plays a role as to how quickly that will happen. Weight loss is all about intaking fewer calories than you burn. So it follows, that full body workouts are much better than any specific exercise.

Time to kill this annoying myth.

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What does the term 'Liberal' when used politically mean to you? I'm doing research for a paper and want to gather varying opinions on the subject. Any answer will be excellent.

Open minded, willing to listen to new ideas/ reforms, willing to consider the needs of the less fortunate, willing to try and create a society where people have equal opportunities and rights, more likely to not use economic progress as the only benchmark for success.

Of course in the US, liberal loses a little bit of its meaning, since you guys generally use it to describe a right wing party (the democrats). So while the democrats are more liberal than the rebulicans, they are both conservatives by any other definition. If the democrats ran where I live (in Dk) they would run as a conservative right wing party.

Hope this was of some use, good luck with your paper.

Edit: Oh and on an amusing side note, while I noticed how the word "liberal" can almost be flung as an insult in the US, the same applies for "conservative" here.

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i personally dont see what is so bad about drugs! maruana(sp) and weed and everything. i would never try it because my parents would freak out, but why is it illegal? all it really does is make you high, which is exactly what alchahol does! if drugs are illegal, alchahol should be aalso!w/ what is the difference? someone please explain to me and why drugs are so bad?

What a load of balloney in some of those answers. Alcohol destroys your brain cells, weed does not. Both the impaired reasoning ability and memory that is experience with weed returns once you have stopped smoking it. Alcohol on the other hand does real damage.

Cigarettes are more addictive than weed and very likely more dangerous to your health (EDIT in reference to the genius above me: and you smoke a hell of a lot more of them than you do weed... well beyond 5 to 1, even if one uses this very dubious statistic).

There is absolutely, no good reason as to why tobacco and alcohol are legal while weed isnt. In NO way am I saying that weed is harmless, it is not, but compared to these mainstream drugs it is not any worse.

You cannot generalise and talk of "drugs". They have so many different effects and risks that it is impossible to group them like this. Some are halucinogens, some just make you feel relaxed (like weed), some give you energy (like speed)... similarly if you OD, some will kill you, some may make you nuts, and some wont have much effect.

So while I can tell you with certainty that all these drugs (from alcohol to heroin) are bad for you in some way, each will expose you to a different set of risks.

What you can be sure of is that the risks associated with alcoholism are totally on par with the worst of the drug junkies. Alcohol plays a part in damaging virtually every organ in your body to a lesser or greater degree. It is associated with heart problems, liver problems, stomach problems, increased risk of some cancers, strokes etc. Someone wrote "drugs damage your liver" below. Alcohol is the great liver killer here make no mistake.

The fact of the matter is that laws do not always make sense. Popular opinion matters far more than facts in this case (as one could see when prohibition of alcohol was attempted in the early 20th century).

Whether or not all should be illegal, or all legal, or whether there should be some middle road is debateble. Personally I think drug legalisation would create a huge improvement to the current situation. But that is a whole different discussion.

However, to conclude, you are prefectly right in spotting an inconsistency in the law. There is no good reason why things are the way they are.

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how can i loose fat on my ass? like i am not fat but my butt i think it big and the way I walk makes it look bigger. what things can i do to work it off?

For Pete's sake you cannot exercise fat away from a specific area of the body. Every time a question like this gets posted there are a bunch of misleading answers which keep the myth alive.

Humans are unable to spot reduce fat. You can lose weight overall through diet and general exercise. Fat will be pulled from all over, and eventually your butt. Genetics plays a part here. Squats will only contribute through the calories they burn.

So, diet and exercise to lose weight or accept your butt as it is :)

Oh and by the way, about the whole fat spot reduction thing. Tell a friend and ask them to pass it on. Play a part in killing this ridiculous myth that has half the world wasting their time doing 1000 crunches every night and nothing else.

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i don't understand the george bush thing and i dont want to ask google. real people give better, straightfoward answers

ok so

- he was running against al gore
- he is a republican whose father was pres before him, george bush senior

why did he win? did he get more electoral votes? i though al gore got more popular votes?

what is your personal opinion of him?

Ok normally I stay away from these things since I do not live in the US, but I figured maybe you might be interested in an outsider's point of view.

First off, I think most of the world mourned the fact that Al Gore didnt win that (particularly after the first few years of Bush's first term). The system, as Thew states, is outdated. Americans are actually under the impression that they live in a democracy, when in fact they do not.

Why Bush won remains a bit of a mystery. I recall watching the debates, and seeing Gore (a very intelligent man) absolutely destroy Bush. The US must be the only place on earth, that I know of anyway, where you can get a "sympathy vote". Gore was advised to go easier on him the second time round, if you can imagine that. The candidate with the best ability to joke around won.

Everyone already explained the electoral system so I wont go into that.

My personal opinion of him is that he is an incredibly dangerous man. This is a guy who referred to his war effort as a "crusade" for heavens sake. If all he had done had remained within the US that would be one thing, but the whole world suffers for his dubious foreign policy and his almost total lack of environmental respect. Economic growth comes at a high price.

I should probably just mention that my opinion has little to do with your whole Republican- Democrat thing. Its kind of amusing to see two right wing parties refer to each other as conservatives and liberals... tomato, tomaato if you ask me, not much in the line of choice.

Anyway, my only consolation is that I am pretty sure history will judge him accordingly. The man who plunged the US into two costly wars for very dubious reasons, who distanced the country internationally from its allies, and who made a mockery of diplomatic efforts with his gung ho "good guy"- "bad guy" mentality.

Thats my opinion anyway. Somehow I think this will be a matter debated inside and outside the US for a long time...

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http://free-game-downloads.mosw.com
Is the above website legal? If not, could you please point me to a legal game downloading website?

It should be. Seems to have free games, either old ones which the companies dont care about anymore (abandonware) or freeware and demos and stuff. Nothing illegal there as far as I can see.

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Hey. I'm trying to loose some pounds for my birthday party that's coming up. It's a pool party and now that gym's over and everything I'm afraid I haven't been very active. I've been going on the tredmill for a half hour each day since yesterday. Lol. But anyways, I want to loose about 10 pounds which would be great. I'm 14/f if it helps. Anyways, I'm also trying to eat healthy but the meals I've been eating really have no flavor. Such as, a bagel with no butter, or plain pasta, or salad. So if anyone can come up with some tasty healthy meals that would help me loose weight or at least that are healthy I would be so greatful. As many ideas as possible would be wonderful too. So just meals that will help with weight loss but are really tasty too! Thank you so much in advance!

First off from what you write, your meals lack protein. A good protein source should be the base for most of your meals. Things like:
Skinless chicken
Skinless turkey
Low fat beef
Tuna
Cottage cheese
Egg whites

Your meals should also be balanced. This gives you the opportunity to mix tastes a bit. Generally they should be composed of a good protein source, a modest carb source, and a small amount of good fat.

So how about something like 100 grams of barbequed chicken breast, a small portion of whole wheat pasta with a spicy tomato sauce, and a small salad with canola.

Or for breakfast, one whole egg and three egg whites scrambled, a slice of whole wheat bread, and some fruit.

You get the idea. To help you I have a link to a bodybuilding site where they share healthy recipes (dont be afraid of the "bodybuilding" part, that just means they eat good healthy meals with ample protein really).

http://www.muscletalk.co.uk/forumid_31/tt.htm

There will be stuff here thats not for you (e.g. some strange shakes and stuff) but you can also find great inspiration.

Anyway good luck. Remember to get 5 healthy meals in every day, drink plenty of water, be active, and get plenty of rest as well.

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When you get to be in your 80s do you start to get more negative and criticize more and get more sensitive.

People age differently. Some become grumpy, others become senile, some dont change much at all.

I guess the only answer to your question is not neccesarily.

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why an ice cube floats in water?

Just wanted to add one thing to the 1000 "ice isnt as dense as water answers" :)

Thats of course true. However, normally things contract when cold and expand when hot. This would imply that frozen objects would be more dense than the same material in non- frozen form. Water however is an exception to that rule. For some reason it expands when frozen.

Thats why ice cubes float.

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is it ok to do intence exercise with them

See a doctor. Heart palpitations can be caused by a variety of different problems. Alternatively they can be harmless. I had them in my early twenties, and asked exactly the same question you did... after some tests they determined it was ok for me to exercise intensively.

Either way, dont follow advice you get from novices when it comes to your heart. See a professional.

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Thanks so much! Your probably right about the age thing, too. I guess there will be other fish in the sea. Well, there is one more fish... guy that goes to my school and is my age. I think he likes me but i'm not sure. He gives me hugs all the time and came up to me today at the basket ball game and was like can I bite you? I was like ...oook and he bit me but he let me bite him back so it was even. And he was sitting beside me all close and everything, But he might just be giving me hugs and... biting me because, you know, he's one of those popular people, but hes not snobby or anything hes actually really sweet, but anyways do you think he likes me?

From what you write it certainly sounds like it. I would find it very very hard to imagine that a guy would act this way and not like you.

I hope this one works out for you. It is better in the end to find someone close to your own age. Makes things so much easier when you are young.

Best of luck.

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if i were to go on a diet and eat only cellary and drink only water for a few weeks,[*and take daily vitamins] would there be any health problems?
thnx.

I see why Mike left this one. Anyway here goes:

Bad idea. Very unhealthy and very counter productive. You will digest your muscle mass first, screw with your metabolism (for lack of a better word), make weight gain (in fat) really easy once you start eating normally, risk getting sick, even risk dying if you do it long enough, have no energy whatsoever, and so on.

In plain terms, just dont.

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Hey Wise A it's me again. Now that Orie knows that I like him he's acting different around me. Like he's being nicer and sweeter to me and talking to me a lot more. It also seems like he's trying to act cool around me, but I know there is no way he could like me because he and my brother are always talking about all these other girls at their school and stuff. There probably isn't a distinguished question in the little thingy but like, what should I do?

Well hello again. Im glad that this kid is acting nicely to you. I was a bit worried last time since you never know how youngsters react if they begin to feel insecure.

The way he is acting towards you does not neccesarily mean that he likes you in that way (as you correctly determined yourself). The acting cool part is very natural, at least for guys. Whether or not he is interested, everyone wants to be perceived as attractive or desired, at least to a point.

The way I see it, you shouldnt do anything else for the following reasons. First of all you have a strong feeling that he is not interested. Secondly you made the first move already, so if he hasnt responded any more than what you describe, then you are probably correct in your assesment. Either way, its his turn now. Its also important not to lose sight of the age gap, and that this was a bit of a long shot to begin with.

So, be friendly with him, but if nothing happens in the near future, then its probably a good idea to try to move on.

Good luck.

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Alright, so last weekend I went skiing for the first time with my dad and sister. I picked up on it pretty well, I had a lesson and the instructor said I was a natural. It took me a while to finally get down a not-so-steep hill without falling, but I was going side to side the whole time and stopping occaisonally. I was so scared to just go straight down for fear of stopping too late and having some crazy wipe out. I'm going again this weekend with my friend and our dads probably, and she has skiied before but not a lot. She is just as scared as me about going straight down... so is there any thing you can tell us to help out with that or at least make it not so scary lol. Also, I really want to learn to snowboard this winter, and the season goes to the end of March. How much time should I spend working on skiing before learning to snowboard also? And any tips there? Thanks, and sorry that was so long.

Im not sure how much I can help you with the scary part. If you bomb a slope you put yourself at risk, so the fear is logical enough. However, its also one of the most intense experiences I know. So why not start small? Choose a small hill or something like that and work your way up to longer slopes. Once you know what to expect you will feel much more in control and some of the fear will go away.

Now, as for snowboarding, thats a totally different thing. Learning to ski will not really help you snowboard, in some cases I would say it will have the opposite effect. When I was young we tried it with our ski instructor. He was just as useless than the rest of us.... maybe even more so than some of the kids. I found that I had to unlearn a bunch of things I had learned from skiing, so I decided against it. However, you might have more luck learning them both at once.

So basically its up to you how much time you want to spend skiing since it wont really affect your ability to snowboard much.

Edit: In answer to your feedback, the snowboard instructor might be a good idea. I would try it out a few times first and see if you are a natural at it as well. However, I really dont know all that much about the sport since, as I mentioned, it wasnt really my cup of tea.

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Im getting my wisdom teeth out in 2 days. I am soo scared. I am pretty sure they are impacted or atleast the top ones are. Is it really going to hurt? Ive heard the procedure is nothing, which i believe but i care about the pain afterwards! Im also getting the "laughing gas" people say its like being high..well ive never been high so what should i expect? How do they give me the gas (like on a mask? i dont get it)? Will I know where I am when I wake up? Will my face be swelled up? How long? Im getting them out on a friday so will I be able to go to school on Monday? Oh god I am soo scared I just want it to be over..Thankyou for your help&time.

Well I cant tell you what the laughing gas is like since I had mine pulled out just with a local anesthetic. I also had mine out on a Friday btw.

This is what they told me before I went in:
- to expect many days of pain and swelling
- to prepare a lot of soft foods since I would be unable to eat properly for ages
- to cancel my tennis games over the weekend cause no way could i ever be able to play
- to get a load of painkillers ready

This is what actually happened:
- The pain and swelling lasted a few days, but it was totally managable with the painkillers.
- It was nowhere near the terrible experience everyone made it out to be
- Mind you, the area will be rather sore and feel "weird" for a long time, but both the swelling and the pain wont be an issue for very long.
- I played tennis throughout the weekend, so needless to say that by Monday I would have been able to go to school

Now its only fair to say that my parents (who are both doctors) said they never saw anyone recover that fast. However, I still dont think there is anything to worry about. Odds are you will be ok by the end of the weekend. Just make sure those painkillers are handy.

Also, I believe they made me rinse my mouth all the time with something (cant remember what exactly). Apparently a lot of time the pain people get is due to infections arising from food getting stuck in the cavities (where your teeth were). You might want to ask about that.

Good luck with your operation. Look at it this way, in the greater scheme of things, two or three days dont really matter. The weekend will be over before you know it :)

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