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Gender: Female
Location: Canada
Occupation: IT Girl
Age: 19
Member Since: September 28, 2005
Answers: 704
Last Update: April 6, 2007
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About Mara
Hey, I'm Mara. I love dancing. It's practically my favourite thing to do. I love House, R&B, pretty much everything with a good beat, and Benny Benassi is my hero; that's why my column is a shrine to him. I graduated this year and am now in my first year of college where I'm trying to pick a major. Chances are you'll see some of my Psychology questions floating around somewhere here. I'm also extremely interested in Political Science too because I, like half the people living in Canada, somehow want to change the world. I particularly want to find a cure for poverty, corruption, cancer, AIDS and George Bush because honestly, I think those are the biggest problems we have right now. I have decided that maybe I should take the time to live a little before I start though because I have a good fifty years ahead of me to fix all the issues there are. Currently my life consists of: studying, working, socializing, eating and ocassionaly sleeping. I spent practically all of my high school life being a delinquent and partying to huge extents until I discovered my brain sometime in the middle of my senior year. I still like to have a good time every once in a while but you always need to find that balance (I haven't exactly found it yet but I'm getting close). Unfortunatley, a habit that has stuck with me from school is my obsessive gossiping. I just can't stop and you know, an article in Cosmo says that gossipers are healthier people because they bond over it? Who would have thought? Anyway, I do have my limitations and I don't condone nasty, brutal gossiping and I don't gossip about anything my friends have told me in confidence or something about someone else that they have slipped to me, however, if I find you in a washroom at a random party making out with my bestfriends's boyfriend, a few people are probably going to hear about it. Actually, more than a few people will hear about it because one of my absolute pet peeves is parties where the all the bathrooms are occupied due to sexual activity or... puking activity. Sooooo what else is there to know about me? My favourite thing in the world is shopping and my worst fear is existantialism. I am OCDey in a clinical way so you can ask me questions about that. You can ask me practically anything you want except for dumb questions but I'm not going to answer them in my little column here because it's a huge waste of space when I could be writing about myself (Click 'LookIt' on my menubar for answers to dumb questions so you don't have to embarass yourself asking them and getting bitched out from me). What I can do, is offer you three pieces of truly inspirational advice. Firstly, never live your life by what others want of you, cherish yourself and everyone around you, and never beat yourself down about anything you couldn't have avoided. Secondly, donate at least ten percent of the income you earn in your life to someone who needs it. Lastly, never get into a bulldozer when you're under the influence and start driving it towards a poor freshmen (I am never going to another kegger ever again... ever). Ok, I'll shut up now. You can start asking me stuff, if you haven't hit the back button already.
Divit says hi
He is the cutest thing ever
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ok my boyfriend told me that alot of times when guys have sleepovers they dare each other to give each other blow jobs and so like he told me he gave two of his friends bj's and his friend gave him one. A while after he told me that i gave him one but we werent protected and now im freaking out cuz im scared i might have gotten one. but could some one blowing him give him an std, if they didnt have one? we are both virgins also.. so is it possible that i might or he might have one? AND... can a virgin having sex with another virgin give one virgin herpies or somthing?
To all your questions, the answer is yes. Alot of STDs (or STIs as they now call them) can be transferred mouth to mouth or mouth to genitals.
Secondly, this doesn't sound like normal guy behavior. Are you sure your boy friend wasn't pulling your leg?
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Hey, ok i am a 19 yr old girl. I've had a total of one boyfriend, and i've never been on a date with anyone other than my ex boyfriend. I think i am an attractive girl, i have a good personality and a lot going for me, but guys just dont seem to go for me. I will get told that i am "hot" and "beautiful" and all that, but no moves are ever made. It's starting to get really annoying. I also don't get much opportunity to meet guys since i am not in school and i dont go out a lot. Would it help if i was more forward with guys that i have an intrest in? Does anyone have tips on meeting them? Getting dates? Anything?
And please--no 13 yr old answers.
Yes, you need to be more forward.
Guys probably don't approach you because you intimidate them. Chances are that the guys who do are probably pretty full of themselves and that's the type you want to stay away with.
If you're after a nice guy, you'll have to make up for it by making the first move and making it very clear that you're interested in a real guy and not one that just walked off a Dolce & Gabbana modeling shoot.
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(-->sorry if this is long but i need help!!)
Okay i have this really good frind..lets call her J.and J had this good friends..lets call her R. J & R were like best friends last year but R didnt like me very much. Then near the end of the year J & R got in a really big fight and they hated each other. Then J found out that she had to move really far away and she was soo madd. Then when this yeah came around J was talkin to me and was like what will you do it R is in some of your classes and i was like well... i dont kno im not gonna be mean but i dont think we will become really good friends and J was like i bet you will become real good firends and all that stuff and i was just kinda like w/e.....so when this year came it turned out that R was im 3 of my classes...It also turned out that we are good firends now... i have not told J much about it i mean I have told her that we talk alot and we dont hate eachother and that stuff .....But when i say that stuff J is kinda quiet and really has nothin to say... do you think J is mad at me for being friends R and what sould i do??i dont want J to get mad at me and never talk to me again it is already hard enough that she lives half way across the country
Well J is probably feeling pretty left out just now.
Just keep her included by mentioning that whenever you talk to R, you talk about your memories with J and how much you guys miss her.
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Why is my hair falling out?
Growing up I always had very thick and abundant hair. But now it's starting to fall out- and I'm only 14...
I dyed it about 3 months ago and it is just beginning to fall out.
Help... I love my hair!
Don't worry about it, honey. I was 15 and I had goregous hair but it started thinning.
My doctor told me that while I lose hair every day, after every few years my scalp lets go a bunch of hair to rejuvenate itself.
It happens with everyone but mostly only people who take great care in their hair actually notice.
If it continues to presist over the next few months though, I would recommend seeing a doctor because the hair is lost at once and not in a gradual process.
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Hey.
Today I had a couple people come over, just to hang out, and I asked one of my best friends to comeover but she said she couldnt because she went out to lunch with her brother. So I said, "Oh, well when you get home call me so you can comeover." and she said ok. She never called me back so I just kinda forgot about it. Then I found out she saw our two other friends there and they asked her to go to the mall so she went! I asked her to comeover wayyy before they asked her to hang out! Ugh it just gets me so mad because I also told her yesterday that I wanted to hang out with her today and she said YEAH! I don't know if I should be mad at her or not. What do you think?
Thanks!
--> Jenna
You have the right to be a little pissed but don't get really mad about it, it's a dumb thing to get mad about. She was inconsiderate but honestly, if you never heard about it, it wouldn't have bugged you so much. They just happened to meet at the same place, it isn't like she deliberatley tried to leave you out.
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okay so I need to lose weight. well I dont mind getting on the tredmill its just that if i look at the same thing everynight while i'm on there (which is the road because my treadmill is facing the front door) i get bored and its no fun anymore...I already listen to music but thats to focus my mind on something else. I tried asking my parents to move the treadmill in the livingroom so I can watch TV while i'm working out but they still wont go for that! I asked this before, and someone told me to "watch my neighbors" well my neighbors are never out! I just watch cars pass by every 1 hour and i hate it! Any suggestions on how to make it more fun?
There are tons of stuff you can do to make it more fun. First of all, play music that you know the words to so you can sing along or buy a story on tape and listen to it while you're running. Prop a newspaper/book on the controls of the treadmill or behind it. Talk on the phone to a friend while you run or invite a parent or sibling to do their homework/papers or just sit there and talk to you while you work out. Count your calories as you work out or entertain yourself by fixing goals (i.e. 100 calories in 15 minutes)
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ok i got the top of my ear periced but it got infected so now it if like a big ball on top of my ear. how can i make it go away so no one in school tomorrow can see it plz help fast i rate 5s
I had the same problem a few months ago. There isn't much you can do to fix it by tomorrow unless you take it off but for now, apply rubbing alcohol at least every hour and that'll bring the swelling down. If you're wearing a nickel earring, switch to medical plastic or gold in the next week.
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Today i rean 9 laps (2 miles and a lap/ 1600 meters)in 30 well a lil under but basically 30 min. Do i have a good endurace or what?
Good job :)
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Well, I LOVE middle school, but...its not the greatest. I'm not ugly, I've been out with a couple diff. guys the last few years, and I'm friends with regular/kinda popular/popular people. Although I'm not popular, and I'm not a geek. I have a feeling this year more guys are noticing me 'cause I've gone through some "look changes" as my friends call it, but I've heard that everyone has more fun/life gets better in High School.
I heard most guys get more mature, get done with puberty, etc, and girls get prettier, get nicer, get more mature, etc. Is it true? Does your life really get better in High School?
I'm just wondering. This question is really for anyone who's ever been trough public High School & Middle School. Thanks, everyone!
(13, 8th grade, yeah...)
High School is -a lot- worse than Middle School.
High School has drama. Not "Oh my god, Jason told Amy to fuck off". It's more like "Oh my god, your best friend got knocked up by your other friend's boyfriend who happens to be your ex-boyfriend".
High School has a popularity food chain. If you rate plankton and you piss the lion off, you may go through the rest of school being ridiculed by everyone.
High School has peer pressure. Instead of being the first one to buy the new Guess purse, you need to be the first to date the most popular guy in school, be friends with everyone, try every drug on the planet, get wasted at all the in parties and lose your virginity before senior year.
High School has teachers. Teachers that don't care if your dog died or your best friend had a break down, you NEED to get that assignment in.
Worst of all, High School has hormonal boys. You think the guys mature? Nope. You have the same pre-hormonal boys. Only now, they're hormonal in PACKS.
So generally, you learn a new language where "You are my hero!" means, "Wait, till I tell everyone what a freak you are!" and "I love you" means "Take off your pants now because I only have one condom and my parents are coming home in thirty minutes."
Trust me, High School sucks. Enjoy your time at Middle School while you still can.
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Why do Americans who have some Irish ancestry in them feel the need to be all proud about it? Some of these people are 2nd or 3rd greneration Americans and have never even left the country.
It isn't just Irish. People like to flaunt other countries too.
I believe it's just the basic human need to stand out of the crowd and be different.
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Should I be worried if I'm on birth control (and have taken it effectively) and he uses a condom and pulls out? I know there's always a chance of getting pregnant, but I should be fine..right?
Well, the pill is 99% effective and a condom is 92% effective so you're better than fine. You shouldn't make him pull out though because you're good anyway and pulling out doesn't change anything except he gets the short end.
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Okay I tried to ask a specific columnists a question and it said sorry this columnists is not receiving questions to their inbox right now. etc etc. Why wouldn't they be accepting questions? What are some reasons you could give me? Thanks in advance!
They probably have had an overload of questions and decided to hold them off for a while.
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Ok i need some help on my hair. It's brown and comes down about half way to my boob. Tonight im oging out and i wanna do something wild, yet fun, yet not too crazy. What can I do? I'm an 8th grader and im prob gonna wear like jeans a a sweat shirt!
1. Take your towel dried hair, apply gel and scrunch it.
2. Tie it up into a tight pony tail. Twist the pony tail into a bun and pin it.
3. Wait for your hair to air dry or dry it with a diffuser.
4. Untie your pony tail and use a curling iron to work out the bits that didn't work out right or apply gel and twist them with your finger.
5. Voila, pretty soft waves!
P.S. And if you're going out, go for a cute t-shirt or a top, no sweatshirts :p
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My son is 17, but a very socially immature 17, acts more like he is 15. He is a senior in high school at a private Christian school, doing very well in most respects. My coworker is a little dramatic and often inappropriate at work, but a nice person and very generous. Her daughter is a freshman at the high school down the street from my son's school. Her daughter has had many emotional and behavior problems and recently was even hospitalized for more than a week while being treated with medication for bi polar and depression. The school is always calling my coworker about this girl, she is always in trouble. I have tried to be a good friend to this woman, we have cubicles right next to each other. Lately she has been on a kick that her daughter needs to date my son. I slid out of the homecoming dance only for her to try to arrange something further now and even asked for my son's e mail address and cell phone number so her daughter can get to know him. I am certain this is a bad idea. My coworker keeps pointing out that she chaperones all her daughter's activities and would take my son to a rock climbing wall facility and snow skiing and to plays and concerts. While I know my son would likely enjoy these activities, I doubt that having a mentally unstable girl thrust upon him by a very forceful mom who is overly involved in her daughter's life is a good choice. What should I say to get out of this? I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings but I really don't want to be pushing my son into a relationship with this dramatic family, nor do I feel I should ever chose his dates.
Usually in a delicate situation like this, dropping subtle hints would be a good way to go. Tell her that your son is facing a lot of problems right now and you are unsure of his mental well-being. Keep telling her that you're worried about his destructive behavior.
If she still doesn't let up, tell her firmly that you don't think the time is right just about now and that your primary concern is your son and his health.
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my boyfriend broke up with me a few weeks ago..due to..extreme differences we'll say. we hadn't really talked in person since..a few words at a party..a couple words at school. yesterday, he was holding the door open for my class who was going outside. i said thank you and he started talking to me. he told me that one of my favorite cds was on my teachers desk. i was like "really?" and he said "yeah, i'll show it to you later." that never happened..but that's besides the point..he was the one trying to talk to me. when we were outside i was in the front row on the bleachers and i turned around and he was looking it me. we made eye contact for a second and then he looked up to the sky. haha. then last night i go on myspace..and he commenting saying that we haven't hung out in a while and we should make some time to...we talked about still being friends after we broke up...but i wasnt sure that that was going to happen since we hadnt talked in a while. i convinced myself that i didnt care if i ws ever friends with him..but now i'm thinking..maybe it wouldnt be so bad. i like his friends so i would get to see them more out of the deal too. hahaha. but do you think there alterior motives underneath the friendship thing..like you don't think this means he misses me and would want to get back together, right?
There is a chance that he wants to be friends but all the signs point to him regretting the break up and wanting to get back together.
Now the question is, would you be willing to work it out?
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Okay I realllllyyyy like this guy. His name is Seth. And I'm friends with him. He sits with all my friends and I at lunch, but he'll never like me. He's liked all of my best friends. And I've been like head over heals for this guy since 6th grade!! (I'm now in 8th) But he likes my best friend! And I seem to have this problem with every guy I've ever liked since I've been in middle school. Every single guy I've ever liked has either gone out with, liked, or was madly in love with my best friend. And I don't really know what to do about it. I know I can't change his feelings for me. Right now he's going out with my best friend Casey. And she's great, and he really likes her and she likes him too. But I don't want to tell her that I still like him because then she'll dump him just because I like him. I don't want that to happen. I just don't know how to cope with the situation. Should I tell her I like him...or just leave it alone and let the situation bother me all the time?
Casey seems like a good friend and you don't want to give her a guilt trip like that specially if she likes him a lot.
Leave it alone and move on.
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My Bffl and our other friend kind of like each other.My bffl is 15 and he is 18 and they both cant date and they want to be together but he is makeing it sooo confusing because he tells me he hates her but then he tells her that he loves her.Whats going on she doesnt know what to do.Should she keep trying with him or just move on?
Tell her to RUN. This guy spells out trouble. She shouldn't be any where near him.
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Im 13, and theres this boy who ive liked from the first day of school, and on the second day, he just randomly walked up to me and started walking next to me and talking to me. He is kind of my friend now but he still doesn that sometimes...do you think these are signs that he likes me?
There is a really good chance. Start talking to him more and drop a few hints to let him know you're interested.
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okay this is for girls but hey if your a guy and you know what your talking about go ahead...so i put eyeliner on and like by the time im at school its wearing off and when i get home its gone and like under my eyes..ahh what can i do..
il rate HIGH
Try aiming for a waterproof eyeliner as it stays on for quite a bit and use a well-known brand, i.e. Covergirl or Maybelline.
Dollar store eyeliner are priced at a lower rate but aren't usually as efficient.
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Aight, I love this girl, we're both 13. Don't bother telling me that 13 year olds don't know love, and that it's only infatuation. I know what love is, and I know what infatuation is. And I don't give a damn about hot, sexy, etc. So anyway, I love her, I've told her that. She knows how madly in love with her I am. Problem is, she's not sure if she likes me back. Oh, sure, I've asked her places, like recently we went to the carnival as 'friends'. I mean, she's a great girl... hilarious, smart, amazing personality... what more could I ask for?
Anyway, the first school dance is coming up. I've never been to a dance. Yeah, last year my parents signed me up for a social dance program, but you don't ask people there, it's just to learn how to dance. And it's only like the cha-cha and everything you'll never use. So I really want to ask her there with no chance of rejection. Ever since I saw her as more than a friend I've been tormented by a sudden flurry of emotions. Love! Hate! Jealousy! Rejection! You name it! I don't want to face the bad ones again... for a while I was too depressed to make jokes---and I'm the class clown! So I don't want to be depressed again, what's a good way for me to ask her out? In short, I'm shy, I love her more than anything else, I don't give a damn about looks, she doesn't like me, I need to ask her to a dance somehow. Emphasis on shy. Thanks!
PS: Also there's this constant awkward silence... what are some good conversation starters? Thanks!
Honestly, you sound like a great guy and if this girl is really as good as you make her sound, she probably realizes it.
The thing to do now is swallow your pride and ask her to the dance -but- as friends so she knows that there isn't anything romantic about the situation and may be more at ease with you.
A good conversation starter would depend on the girl. Try to find out about a class/music/music she likes and ask her about it. Importantly, ask her questions about herself, only bring yourself in if you agree with something she says/does. People love being asked about themselves. She'll fall for you in no time.
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