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I've known him for 5 months. He's an incredibly sweet, kind, caring, and genuine guy. He's older than me and lives far away. My parents don't care about the age difference but don't believe that he has a good enough job for someone of his age. They think that I can't possibly know him (because of the distance) and don't know what kind of family he comes from etc.
He's come to visit me multiple times since we met. These visits are really expensive because he has to get a hotel. If I were to visit him it would be a lot cheaper because I could stay at his apartment, or even at my friends apartment which is 45 mins away from his.
I'm 18 years old but am still dependent on my parents. They said that if I go visit him they will stop paying for my university. However he can't come visit me anytime soon and I really miss him. They took my passport and think that I don't know but I realized it was missing. So I'd have to confront them and ask for my passport back.
I don't know what to do. (link)
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That's a difficult situation.
Your parents are just concerned. Honestly, if I had a daughter who was dating an older guy who lives far away, I'd be skeptical and would probably be feeling the same way as them.
So even though this sucks, I don't think there is a way to convince them to let you go see him and still have them pay for school. So you'd have to pick one. If you would rather go with him and work over there, then do that. If you'd rather just wait till you're done with school, then do that. It's hard when you can't have both things at once.
So I'd say talk to them, don't argue or anything. Just tell them that you understand why they feel that way but you'd really like to see him and it would mean a lot to you if they'd let you go.
Just state your reasons and hope that they let you go. If not, then you'll have to make your choice.
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My guy friend from school invited me over to his birthday party. I had a great time and he was being very social to everyone, asking if 'we' (me and my 3 friends) were ok and having a good time.
Then it was time for me to leave. I told him I had a very good time and said thanks for inviting me! Then he said 'that's good' then out of the blue said, i'll give you a hug and well, we hugged. I was shocked and just said 'ok'.
I cant remember how the hug was because I was in total shock! And this was the first time he hugged me and his parents were there watching and they looked surprised too!
After the hug I looked at the ground and said 'That was a little awkward...' and he said 'Yeah it was, wasn't it?' ONLY BECAUSE HE HUGGED ME FOR THE FIRST TIME! I said ok cya at school and he said the same and we went our separate ways.
What just happened? Can someone tell me? Was it a 'ok thanks for coming hug'? or something else...
Tomorrow I will ask my friend if she got a hug too. If she did I will know it was a 'thanks for coming hug', but what if she didn't get one?
What the heck does this mean? >_ (link)
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It was a hug...not a kiss. How old are you?
What just happened? You guys hugged, that's what friends can do and it's appropriate to do so. Don't think so much into it.
He hugged you for the first time so I guess it's ok for it to be weird, no big deal though.
Reading into small things like this will drive you out of your mind when really not serious happened.
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There's an acquaintance of mine who has a fucking obsession with taking people's crushes/boyfriends/any boy that another girl is even just talking to away from them. For example, she would notice that I'm talking to a guy that I have even a casual crush on and then pounce on him right when she has the chance! And I'm getting sick of it! It's like an obsession with proving to the whole world that she could get any and every guy she wants. I think I should confront her with this for the 20th time, but I know this hasn't been effective, so I would like some ideas please? I just want her to stop. (link)
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I agree with Rahzie completely. You can't really stop anyone from doing things like this. I mean you can talk to her, but if this is just what she does, it just might not stop and it might even encourage her.
And like Rahzie said, these guys don't try to stop her, guys just can't be taken unless they want to be.
So you'll just have to find the right guy who won't fall for things like that.
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My friend from dance class introduced me to her stepbrother who I really got along with. We ended up going on a few dates together and then became a couple a few weeks after. All of his ex's have either been emotionally unstable or over weight or just horrible people so I feel like because i'm average weight and relatively normal im a bit of a novelty to him and thats why he's fallen so fast. I'm unsure of how to feel about everything! He has already started saying he loves me and I feel alot of pressure to say it back even though I dont feel the same. When we first got together I was attracted to him and we got on really well and I really cared about him, those feelings just having developed into love. If this was the only thing it'd be a bit easier but i'm the first girl he's ever introduced to certain members of his family and its a really big deal for him. I dont know what to do, please help. (link)
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You just need to be honest with him. If you're not ready to tell him that you love him then tell him you feel like you guys are moving too fast. He thinks it's ok because you're not saying anything about it.
I don't understand the breaking up because you think that you're a novelty thing to him. I don't really get that just because his ex's aren't the same as you. Maybe he just got tired of those type of girls?
Either way, you should talk to him about that too if that's how you feel.
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i was wondering becuase on here i once asked a few questions on getting a website called topix shut down and i was wondering what it would look like after it was removed so anyway what i am saying is that once a site is shut down what will it resemble especially if its that dreaded topix . com but please no links to topix i dont want to use that site again . (link)
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It probably just won't have anything on the site or say that the site is no longer available.
Why do you care if you're not even going to check it?
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Me in this guy are both teenagers and we dated for a few days and them we had to break up because something SERIOUS happened then we got back together for about 3 weeks. we broke up. he was the sweetiest guy ever to me I really loved him and I could tell that he loved me. There is something that you can describe what you see in someone but the places they take you when you are with them are just magical. It's been a week now and I'm not really with another guy but he is comforting me with him. I've cried everyday for him. i'll right an I Miss You message but I get to nervous to send it. why am I hurting so bad over him. im a teen I should move on but I cant im hurting (link)
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It's normal to be upset and hurt when you lose somebody you cared about.
How long have you guys been broken up? If it hasn't been very long, you just need to give it time.
I think for you, it's gonna take a few months to move on.
What you need to do is get your friends, go out and enjoy yourself. Don't mope around and complain about him. Don't text him, delete his number, don't contact him at all. Besides that, do things that you enjoy and do your best to keep your mind off him.
What you're feeling is normal. You're a teenager, feelings are real and you'll eventually move on.
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Thank you so much it's just that I already made her mad one time before and she didn't talk to me for 2 years and we are just getting to be like sisters again and I don't want anything to happen to mess up our relationship over something like this because he is the only guy that's ever been so good to her and they are both happily married. (link)
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Yeah, so just keep it to yourself and keep distance.
If you want to keep that relationship, don't let your feelings get the best of you.
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Thank you so much for your advice it's just that me and my cousin are like sisters and I didn't want to do anything that would harm our relationship because I really do care about her and her feelings. (link)
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It's tough but as long as you don't try make a move then everything should be fine. You obviously don't want to jeopardize you and your cousins relationship and your cousin and her husbands relationship.
Just do your best to keep your distance from him and look around and find other men you could be interested in.
What did you like about your cousins husband? Look for those qualities in other guys.
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I think i might actually have feelings for my cousins husband I don't know what to do help . (link)
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You move on.
He's married, and not only that, he's married to your cousin so just let it go.
It's a difficult situation but you don't make a move. You do everything in your power to let him go and move on to someone else.
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I am 17 years old girl.I have a family and a friend,but everyday in my life..i feel so lonely.I have do a lot of things,to make myself happy,but it doesn't work.
I try to go hangout with my family,but..my heart feel so lonely and sad.....
I have talk to family about my problem..but they doesn't understand me.And i don't know what to do...i feel like, it's better if i die than live like this....
(link)
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The simple answer is that you need to talk to someone...besides your family. You should talk to a counselor or therapist. They'll help you get down to the root of the problem and fix it. You won't have to keep feeling like this.
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My period is late and I want to know how late it can be before I know it's gone. I know I'm a virgin so I'm not pregnant so I don't know why my period is so late. (link)
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You don't have to be pregnant to have a late period..
There are lots of things that factor into having a late period or even missing a period.
One of the most common is stress.
Some others are..
A change in your regular routine, being sick, taking medication, change in your weight, or exercising a lot more.
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Me and my boyfriend have been dating for over a year now. Around about the time we got in a relationship together, it had been 3 years since him and his ex girlfriend had been split. All the way through our relationship, she has done nothing but harass him. Sometimes she will go weeks without texting him, then she will harass him all day for days, it's mostly when she's drunk. She sometimes texts him in a general chit chat, like "Hi, how are you?" Etc, and he replies being short and blunt, but when she texts him saying she loves him, he just says ok and haha. She knows he is with me, so why won't she leave him alone? Why won't he tell her to leave him alone? He says he feels sorry for her, I tell him that the only way she's going to get over you is for you to completely blank her. When he sees her in public, he won't even look at her. Why is this? I've told him to ignore her, for her to move on but he just doesn't listen... I know he doesn't have feelings for, but why is this? What can I do? (link)
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So you've been with your boyfriend for over a year, and she's been doing this throughout your relationship?
I'm just wondering why he still keeps her number.
Ok, so maybe he's just one of those guys that are too nice and are afraid of being mean. But if he isn't, then he's probably enjoying the attention of having this girl obsessed with him.
So you gave him the best advice. To just stop talking to her and she'll get the hint. But he's not taking it, so my advice to you would be for you to ask him to stop talking to her. That you're finding it really disrespectful that he's texting his ex still after this time. Don't argue, just tell him.
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As the title says I'm always afraid that someone close to me will die. Whenever my boyfriends phone is off or he isn't answering I imagine him being in a terrible accident. Whenever he's late I think the same thing. Or I think he just dropped dead. The same thing goes for my mom when she doesn't answer the phone. I don't know what's wrong with me. I've never had anyone close to me die or anything like that. I've never lost someone I love before so why is this always happening? Right now my boyfriends phone is off and it's probably because his battery is dead. He should be home by now but he's not which probably means that he just had to stay a little longer at work. But I'm still sitting here with an uncomfortable feeling in my stomach that something terrible happened. I actually thought about what I would say at his funeral. What can I do about this, it's driving me crazy :( (link)
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Like the others said, you need to find ways to occupy your mind.
I'm not gonna lie, I do sometimes imagine someone I love in some sort of accident or just died. I don't do it every time they don't answer me though. Like you said, you even thought about what you would say at his funeral. I've listened to music that had to do with someone that they love passed away and I'll go through a ridiculous long day dream about the whole funeral and such.
I think you're thinking about it a lot because it never happened to you and we all hear about these kinds of things quite often.
I've thought about it a little more since I had gotten a call that my dad was in the hospital because of some freak accident and he might not make it.
So as someone who can say they've been where you're at, you just need to occupy your mind and make sure you tell everyone you love them while you still can.
If for some reason, you just can't stop thinking about things like this, like Zane said, you should seek therapy, especially if it's driving you insane.
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How can I get over wanting to see his phone?? I wanna see it every time we're together.. Trust issues /: we been together 10 months.. I'm 16 he's 17 (link)
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Like the other two said, you just have to stop.
If he given you a reasons not to trust him, then that's something the two of you need to work on. Working on it isn't checking his phone. If he hasn't done anything then don't check his phone and just enjoy the time you guys spend together.
This small thing can ruin a relationship.
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there is this tutor I work with in the tutoring lab in college. She's great and a wonderful person to be around with. She is about 28 and I am 22 and she is engaged, My class ended a few months ago but I saw her around campus when I was going to meet up with a friend recently and chatted with her
now I find myself going out of my way to that location just so I can hopefully see her and talk to her again. Is this creepy? (link)
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You really like her and you hope to see her more often. Honestly, it might not be really, really bad but it's not healthy. It does you no good. It's even worse than the people who Facebook stalk their ex. It really does nothing good for them.
So like Dragonflymagic said, you should look at the qualities you liked in her, and find them somewhere else.
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i am a 11 year old boy and my gf is 12 she wants to have sex some of my friends who have done it before say i should i don't know what to do (link)
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It's normal to want sex at your age. It's obviously not a smart thing to do though.
It will hurt her like crazy since her body is still developing. Not only that, I don't think you want to have a child when you're only 11. I doubt since she's only 12, she can get on birth control. She can't even see a doctor without her mother present since she's only 12. So it's best to just wait it out because a lot of bad things can happen.
Also, you don't have to do it just because your friends have done it.
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Can i kiss my boyfriend if i have a cold sore on my lip? (link)
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No, he can end up getting a cold sore too. Cold sores are also known as herpes 1. People don't want to get that so don't kiss him.
Even if it hasn't opened yet, if it's still just a bump on your mouth, still don't kiss him.
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Im pushing my boyfriend away. Im 16 hes 17. We been together for 10 months on December 2nd. I have a BAD JEALOUSY problems and bad TRUST issues. Hes cheated on me before in the past. Im trying to trust him again and I do then I stop again. We fight so much. Im always mad about something, him texting this girl everyday. He comments on instagram photos saying to text him and stuff, ofcourse im going to get mad. Hes my bestfriend so how can I stop this? How can I stop pushing him away?? Please help me I don't want to lose him.. I need as much advice as I can get!!! (link)
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You both are both in the wrong in your relationship.
Yours is obviously the jealousy and his is the not listening to you and talking to other girls.
Honestly, jealousy and the trust problems you have are natural. If my boyfriend was texting other girls and commenting on instagram for them to text you, I'd be very upset. I think it's just the way you're handling it. You need to talk to him without getting mad. That will push him away. You need to tell him that you are his girlfriend, you're not ok with him texting other girls. Even if he says they are just friends, it doesn't look good to other people. The relationship between you two aren't looked at seriously.
If he doesn't stop, then he's not respecting you. You don't stay with guys who don't respect you.
You can't make him stop doing anything, but you can express how you feel without arguing with him. If it just doesn't get through to him, dump him.
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there's this girl who is my boyfriends best friend..whenever he chats with her he'll be online but he'll reply me a bit late(not always)..they were very good friends and mostly everyone thought that they liked each other.. i cant tolerate that girl..i have told him that i don't like her..but still they talk and my boyfriend is bit childish..i cant tolerate that girl..she doesn't like him but i don't like their closeness..it makes me insecure. he says that i'm the most important person to him but i don't feel so..what should i do.. (link)
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So he's technically not doing anything wrong besides the fact that he's not really listening to how you feel about the situation.
So you're just going about it the wrong way.
So lets get some things straightened out. He is going to stay friends with this girl. If you try to get in between them, it'll just make you look like the bad guy. So you're going to accept that he's going to have this friend. If you can't handle it, you should just end things.
You shouldn't go and tell him that you just don't like her. He won't see why and will just think that you're a jealous girlfriend. I mean you are jealous, but you have your reasons. You don't like how close they are and you feel insecure about her.
Even with my boyfriends guy friends that I didn't like, it doesn't get through to them to straight up say that you don't like them.
So you need to tell him that you understand that she's your friend, but there are some things that need to be fixed. The number one thing that you've told us would be that he replies late. As long as he doesn't do that anymore, you should be fine.
I don't know what other issues there are that you have with the two of them being friends. You didn't give any other details. If it's just that you don't like their closeness, you can't change that. But if he's doing something that's actually bothering you besides the jealousy like the replying late then you need to talk to him about that.
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Okay, so.. I met this guy, Robert, from my old job. He was very nice and we talked sometimes when I needed to go to his department for something. We never exchanged numbers or talked about hanging out, it was more just coworkers being friendly. About six months into the job I realized it wasn't for me and I quit. I didn't say anything to anyone other than my boss so I kinda just disappeared. Well, I after starting my new job I began to run into Robert while on my way to work, leaving work, etc. We would talk for a little while and then part ways. One night while I was heading home I ran into him and we started talking about our day as usual but this time when I said goodnight and began walking away he stopped me and said we should grab drinks sometimes. I was surprised but agreed and we exchanged numbers and he said he would text me later. About an hour after I got home he texted me and we talked a little more and then I went to bed. Two days later he texted me, "Good morning!" randomly, which I thought was nice. After that, we started talking more and more and eventually made real plans to hang out. He was more excited than me about getting together (he even told skip some plans I had to hang out with him). When we finally hung out, it was so much fun! We spent most of the night laughing and just talking about life. The next morning he texted me asking when I'd be available again. I was working a lot so I told him I'd keep him updated. He seemed fine with that and we kept in touch. But he had some serious family issues that started going through so I have him my prayers and gave him space. After a month or so of not speaking I sent him a text and he never replied. I don't get all messed up about things like that but I know that things are okay with him now (we have a mutual friend from my old job that told me) and I'm just wondering why he went from being the one to push the friendship progressing to not communicating at all? I actually really like him; he's sweet, really funny, smart, very attractive and single. And he seemed to show a ton of interest but it just suddenly died. I don't know if he just wasn't really into me, thinks I'm not really into him, he's super busy, etc. It's been almost three months since we lasted talked and I would like to try again but I don't know where to start. And I fear if I text him that he won't respond again. What should I do? (link)
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Well he did make it clear that he was interested in you. So you don't need to think that he was never even interested in you.
So like you said, he's either just lost interest, is really busy or still has some issues to deal with and isn't ready yet.
I'd say give it a little more time, then text him. Just a text asking how he is, that whenever he's ready or available, you'd love to hang out.
If he doesn't respond, then just wait. He'll most likely eventually text you when he's ready.
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