About EricStarr
Hi! My name is Rick (Eric is my middle name) Im an average guy who has been lucky enough to raise 5 wonderful children. 4 girls and a boy, and Im proud how they all turned out. I don't know what, but I must have done something right LOL.
My Hobbies are fitness, sailing, Scuba diving, golf and computers. I'm currently a corporate trainer, training managers in motivational skills and love what I do. I feel Advicenators is and excellent place to share experiences and ideas with others. Im looking forward to sharing with you!
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E-mail: Ericstarr4u@aol.com
Gender: Male
Location: Chicago
Age: 41
Member Since: January 23, 2005
Answers: 78
Last Update: June 27, 2006
Visitors: 10899
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I am a 5'4'' female that weighs 137 punds. I am turing 14 next month. If you thhink im fat, your wrong. I have a tiny tummy but no one would ever guess because i am skinny. My question is.. I want a 6 pac and what is the best way to get one quick? Please give me some things to do and how long itiwll take befor emy stomcih will be firm
I started doiong 100 sets up cruches.
50-reglalr
25-to thhe right
25-to the left
twice a day..
please help me!
!thanks in advance! (link)
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Believe it or not, you already have 6 pack abs. Everyone does, its the basic muscle structure of the human body. You just want to see them better.
While your not fat, many thin peoples abs are covered with inter muscular fat that keeps them from appearing defined.
That being said, if you want the abs to show through that thin NORMAL layer of fat, you want to build them up a little.
While the exercises you are doing are great for toning, they do not build the size of your abs. What has worked for me is doing crunches with weights on my ankles and a weight plate on my chest. For starters you can use a heavy book and hold it on your chest with your arms crossed over it. Use a weight heavy enough so you can only do 8 to 10 reps. do this for 3 sets twice one day ( morning and evening ) then rest them the next day. The rest day is necessary because Exercising doesn't build the muscle, it tears them down. What builds the muscle is the repairs that the body makes while resting.
This will build your outer abs. Another exercise you will want to do is called Vacuums. You get on your hands and knees push all the air out of your lungs and suck your stomach in like your trying to touch your belly button to your spine. What this does is build the muscles on then Inside and creates great definition. Arnold Schwartzenegger used this religiously to create amazing definition in his abs.
Good Luck!
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hey everybody. My friend was dating her bf for a year and a few months and they had already decided their wedding date, childrens names, where they would live, ect. They just recently "went on a break" and then broke up completely, but they are still going to get married, as planned, the summer after she graduates high school. I told them that if they can't be together in a dating relationship then how where they going to do in a marriage but to them this makes sense. What do you think about this? (link)
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While it does seem like an awkward thing. You didn't mentions their ages but based on what they are planning I would guess they are young.
If so, then actually it's a good thing that they are separating for the time being. It will give them time to get to know them selves and probably date other people. I wouldn't worry about them. If its not meant to be they will drift apart by the end of High School. I'm sure at that time they won't just get married because they said they would when they were younger.
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ok so for lent i'm promising myself to walk the dog atleast 1 a week, do 15 situps a day, eating healthy (tho i can never do it) and practice soccer and tennis whenever i can....what else can i do to get results....FAST?
please please help! i'll rate and comment....thanks. (link)
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First of all, it depends on what you mean by "fast". Don't try to loose more that 2 to 3 lbs per week or you'll be loosing lean muscle which will cause you to burn less calories at rest and eventually store more fat. Its a vicious cycle. The BEST way to loose weight is to keep your body burning it. Eat small meals every 3 hours to keep your body from going into starvation mode. Cycle exercise between cardio one day (walking, Jogging, dancing, etc) and Muscle conditioning the next (push ups, sit ups, squats, etc) or even weight training if you desire. Just don't look for the quick secret, it really doesn't exist.
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Okay, well my ex boyfriend wasn't the best person to and for me. We just broke up recently. Well this other guy like me alot, so he asked me out, seeing as how we are best friends I said yes. Now, I'm totally regretting it. I am madly in love with my ex and it kills me everday because we're not together. I seriously just want to die w. out him. So I have to break up with the other guy, my best friend. But he is crazy about me, and I thought I was about him. What should I tell him?
I know I'm going to tell my ex I still love him, I'm that kind of person to do that.
But my best friend. :'[
someone please help me. this is awful.
andheartssemicolon
Alex (link)
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The first line of your question concerns me the most. Your ex wasn't good to you? For your own sake don't go back. I know it's hard to get over a relationship, even destructive relationships are hard to let go of. Try to take a rational look at why you feel you're madly in love with your ex and you may find some surprising truths about yourself. Perhaps you are right about this "best friend" not being the one, but remember the "RIght" one should always be your best friend!
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What are some good over the counter diet pills? (link)
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Over the last 30 years I've studied fitness & nutrition and checked out all the programs, fad diets and gimmicks. The one thing I've learned, is that there is NO miracle pill, no magic diet, or NO amazing gismo, that will give you the body you seek. The only pills I ever recommend to those trying to just loose weight is good Multi vitamin combined with proper diet and exercise.
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my boyfriend told me he has a
crush on another girl,
and i don't know what to do.
he says he loves me and wants to be with me,
and that he just wanted to be honest with me.
but now i feel as though i'm going
to be paranoid all the time.
i dont like feeling like this;
but i can't leave him.
i love him too much..
and today he spent all morning with me,
telling me how he doesnt want this to
interfear with our relationship.
he said it was weighing him down
and that he needed to get it off his chest;
but now that it's off of HIS.
it's not been put onto MINE.
what should i do?
-L
(link)
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When we're young and unsure of a relationship it's hard to hear things like that from someone we care for like you do. However, if a guy told you he never looks at another girl he's pretty much lying.
He's being honest with you and telling you that in spite of this fact he wants to be with you. I would look at the positive side. He sees you as the BEST because in spite of is hormonal desires he chooses to be with you, and is open enough to share his true feelings. Not many guys are mature and secure enough in a relationship to share and trust their partner that much!
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I just want some opinions on this:
Do you think it's wrong to let your boyfriend go to a strip club?
I personally think it is wrong, but then I see some girlfriends even go with their boyfriends to stripclubs!! I just don't get it. How could you let your boyfriend get turned on by another woman? ..or let alone get a sexy lap dance by another woman? I personally think that can even lead to the thought of cheating.
What do you guys think? I am 18 and my boyfriend is 17 and he will be 18 next month. I don't know whether to never let him go to a strip club(since that is a common thing for men to try out at least once in their lives) or to let him try it out. I am really uncomfortable with that idea. (link)
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Just to ease your mind a little bit, You have to understand why guys that age go to strip clubs.
For the most part it's not as much just to see the woman as you would think. It's more for the novelty because they can, and more a male bonding thing between guys. I'm not saying whether it's right or wrong I'm just trying to explain the facts.
I wouldn't worry about it if its an occasional night with the guys, it doesn't mean hes looking for somthing else cause he wont find a relationshp at a strip club. But, if he makes a habit of it you need to discuss it.
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Last night I had to spend the night with my sister. She is married and already has children. So while she was taking a bath I was looking on her phone and found Text messages that where from her husband (he has a driving job) and one said, "Talk Dirty To Me." and another one said, "Wouldn't you like to be licked all over?". I was so shocked. I mean I would have never thought of him acting like that. So I put the phone down and I just couldn't read anymore. I still feel shocked and horriable. I know she is married and has a right to do what she wants,and I shouldn't have been looking on her phone and nowI just don't know what to do. Any Ideas?? (She is 29, he is 30) (link)
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Actually you should be happy for your sister that her and her husband who are married still have a loving relationship. He's a driver and away from home and thinking about his wife.
Thats a wonderful thing!
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Not good. My best friend and I like the same guy and he might like her back and I'm completely jealous annnd she doesnt know I like him.
I just got out of a relationship.
what to do? (link)
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I would be honest with your friend if it comes down to it, but if they like each other let it go. A real friendship is much more important than one guy, I wouldnt let a crush ruin it, There are alot of guys out there, and you'll find one.. or two.. or three!
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My sister is getting married in October and she's been searching for a really long time to find a good song to do the boquet song to. Does anyone know any good songs to do that to? It would be highly appreciated.
Thank you. (link)
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My Daughter had them play "I Will.. But" By Shedaisy. It was really cute the way she played up to the song while getting ready to toss the boquet.It's a pretty fitting song if you listen to it!
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My plan is to work, verry hard.
Im going to workout Before school with a toning video. (5:30am-6:00am)
Then right after school on the tredmil (3:00pm-3:30pm)
Then after my homework,and stuff..(around 6:00pm-7:00pm)
Im going to take all junk away from myself, and my eating. I will drink water, Im going to eat no snacks, and all healthy foods (But i will eat every meal)
Im deterimed, very.. But how much do you think i could loose, within maybe 2 weeks?
(link)
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That sounds like a pretty aggressive plan. Just be careful not to over do it. If you try to loose weight too fast your body will actually slow down its metabolism to conserve energy. You don't really want to loose more than 3 lbs/week.
Doing the morning work out is a good Idea, but it's best to do the tread mill in the morning on an empty stomach for best fat burning results. As far as the toning video, I would do that only every other day. Muscles don't become toned during the exercise. The exercise breaks down muscle. Its the muscles repairing themselves AFTER the exercise that builds and tones them, so you need to give them a chance to rest and repair between work outs.
Also, don't give up snacks, just eat healthy ones. It's best to eat small meals every 3 or 4 hours to keep your body in fat burning mode.
Good luck!
~E
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I'm 18, and my child is due on March 3rd. I'm really excited about this, but the problem is with the father.
Don't get me wrong--I really love him, but I'm scared we leaped into everything too soon.
We were dating for 3 months when I found out I was pregnant. I was scared to tell him, but he was so supportive, and he ended up absolutely ecstatic about it once we'd both been reassured about some things. We're engaged now, and things are going great.
But, that's the problem.
I think things are too good, and that once the baby is born that things might fall apart. I really want to talk to him about this, but I don't know how to approach it.
Any help is more than appreciated.
Thanks for your time. (link)
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You definitely want to bring it up and discuss your concerns with him. Start now being honest and open. You will have a lot of challenges to face together so now is the time to begin with communication.
It CAN work out. I was in your shoes 23 years ago, were still together, and I would not change a thing. If you ever want to talk with someone who's been down the road your starting out on, you know where to find me.
Good luck and Love,
~E
PS, If you ever get the chance, listen to a song called "There goes my life" By Kenny Chesney
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I am 16/F. At home I don’t use panty or any thing underneath to feel relax . I feel uncomfortable always wearing so many things, my skin not so good with elastic materials. Few days back I was alone at home in my room wearing frock, no panty. Door bell rang , my uncle was there. We were sitting in living room on opposite sofas and have a chat on various topics as he visited almost after two months. After about one hour suddenly my mind sparked and I realized that I was without underwear and uncle must have seen my private parts. So I swiftly change my sitting position. Uncle left the home after half an hour. This incident was worst for me. I am feeling embarrassment as my uncle might think about my acts and character. Please advice me what should I do for my piece of mind. Should I explain my uncle the situation.
NJ (link)
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As an uncle myself, I wouldn't even be looking at my niece there to notice, and I'd be willing to bet he didn't. If it was that obvious that he couldn't help but notice believe me he's not giving it a second thought, or thinking badly of you. Bringing it up to him is not necessary and would just be more stressful for both of you.
You should try let it go and forget about it. Although I can see how it could be troubling to you, you're building it up in your mind and causing yourself unnecessary stress.
~E
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so i've been dating this guy and he really likes me. he talks about wanting a really serious relationship as in wanting it to result in something for the future. hes 18 so i can understand why but the problem is im 16. i was in a year relationship all of my freshmen year and i enjoyed this year by being single. i really like single as a matter of fact i prefer being single but i really like this guy. he really likes me too and i dont want to break his heart and i dont want to lose him. but i feel like im not as happy as i used to be cause i cant party as much as i used to i cant talk to all the guys i used to hang out with all the girls i used to or anything like that. i really dont want to waste two more high school years by being in a relationhip when i should be having fun. what do i do? should i break it off or give it time to see how things go? what would you do? (link)
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It's thoughtful of you to think about his feelings like you are, and shows maturity on your part. However, you need to explore those feelings your having. You need to allow yourself the fun teen years without feeling you have to answer to a guy. If he is the one down the road, eventually you are going to feel that you didn't get to be your own person during this time of your life and may even grow to regret him for it.
I would tell him how you feel, You obviously like this guy so tell him. But, also tell him you need to take it slow and enjoy the freedom to be yourself before you can commit to one person on a long term basis.
Good luck and love.
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Well I just realized how old I am getting. I'm turning 28 in 2 months and that's like almost turning 30!! I can't believe how time has snuck up on me. I remember when I was 18 thinking that someone who was 25 was anceint, and now here I am turning 28. It's quite a milestone because it means I've been out of highschool for ten years, and that the reunion will probably be this summer. I havent acomplished even half of the things I wanted to have done. When I was 18 I thought I'd be married and have kids by this age. Well I'm still single and childless. I also don't have a nice career, I work at a minimum wage job.
Does anyone have any advice to make me feel better about my age? People are joking that I'm turning into an old maid. (link)
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It's completly normal to think about that some time in your mid to late 20's. Mine happened when I was 25, I guess it was the 1/4 centry thing that got to me LOL. Anyway, it will pass and you'll realize how young you really are. I'm 41 and recently went on a Diving trip with a group of guys whos AVERAGE AGE was 65, and they were wild! My point is, don't think about your age in years. Stay active and fit, focus on trying new hobbies and activities, keep learning, and most of all, dont look back at what you dont have. Look forward to what you want and go for it!
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Hey Guys =D
Okay I'm working towards a healthier lifestyle for myself ( less junk food, more exercising ) and so far its working out great! However I'm having the worst time giving up soda. I love love love coke and I drink like 2 or 3 cans a day! I know this is really bad for me but how do I stop? I can't just STOP drinking them, and I've tried drinking less and less each day but its not working out so great. Any ideas?
Thank you so much! (link)
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First you need to find out what it is about the coca-cola you are "addicted" to Yes it could be an addiction. Try caffiene free coke, and see if thats it, then try caffiene free diet coke. ease off slowley and try to switch to water.. Good luck!
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This guy that I've been friends with for a couple of years just got divorced. He told me that he wants to get married to me. He has never had children and said he wants to start a family with me. My concern is that he is 45, 17 years older then me. If we started to have children, by the time my child was 18 he would be in his 60's!! I am also concerned because he is quite old fashioned, and would want me to be a stay at home mom. I just got a promotion at work, and I don't want to have to quit it so soon. I've only been with the company for 4 months. He also has a tendancy to treat me like a child, has a bad temper, and is very tight with his money. He's also very possesive of me. I don't know what to do. He would be a good father, and I know I'd be a good mother, but I don't think I'm ready to start a family. My job is too important to me right now. And he seems really desperate to have a child, he's not getting any younger. Does anyone have any advice? (link)
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Honestly, I think the age difference is the last thing you should be worrying about. Take a close look at how you describe him. You use words like bad temper, desperate, controlling, treats you like a child, tight with his money.
You seem like an open and caring person. Of course this is just an opinion but find someone as caring as yourself that when you describe them you use words like, Loving, caring, supportive, and generous.
Good luck!
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14 year old female, big boned. height=5'9 weight=180
i've recently changed my eating. here are two days worth of eating examples;;
1. no breakfast( i woke up too late)
lunch-2 peices of wheat bread, 1tbsp of mayo & 2 tbsp of honey. and lettuce. ( no lunch meat )( total=345 calories)
yogurt, light n fit. (35)
2 nature valley bars (190)
dinner-banana
nature valley bars
chives & sour cream baked potato frm wendys
snacks-apples
about 900 caloires
2.
breakfast-apples
lunch-apples
diet cherry vanilla dr. pepper
nature valley bars
yogurt
dinner-bagel with cream cheese
baked poatoe with chip dip
snacks;a bite of chocolate
about 800 calories
am i eating too less? its hard to eat heatly & eat alot. $ is a huge issue
i exercise so thats not a problem
i'm trying to lose weight, but ami eating to little? and what is cheap and easy to eat that i could add bc i don't think thats enough food
any help/tips greatly appreciated (link)
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First of all you should know what weight you should strive to maintain. Your current Body mass index is approx 26.6% The average for a 14 yr old female is 19.5% But between 18.5 and 24.5 is considered normal. Since you say you are "big boned" you should probably strive for a weight of 155 to 160 which would put you in the 23% range.
To maintain this weight you should be eating about 1500 calories/day, Since you want to loose weight, reduce this but not below 1200 calories/day. When you drop below this, your body will go into starvation mode. Since muscle burns fat, your body will react by dropping muscle to save fat stores. The trick is to eat 5 to six small meals a day of about 200 calories. Your body will then feel comfortable that it is getting adequate food and begin to burn the fat stores.
Your meals should include more protien than you are currently eating. Strive for about 40% protien, 40% complex carbs, and 20% fat. With this and a moderate exercise plan you should loose a healthy 2-3 Lbs/week .
Good luck and if I can help you know where to find me!
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when it comes to guys im way behind. im not so good at handling them. a lot of guys have approached me and like me.. but i seem to always turn them down.. not because i dont like them, but because im scared. theres only one guy ive ever trusted and he has a girlfriend. he said if he was single hed go out with me in a second. which is why i think i turn guys down. im scared that if i get into a commitment with a guy.. when the guy i really like(the one with the girlfriend) is single ill be taken. im also scared because my parents are super strict and i would have to hide a boyfriend if i had one. im 16 years old btw. ahh i dont know what to do. im missing out and i want it to stop. any advice? (link)
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Dear Shy,
I feel that Bittersweet's advice was right on the money. Remember, when you first begin dating, try to date different people and find the qualities that you like in someone and those that you get along best with. That way when its time to commit to a serious relationship you will know what your looking for. What I mean my dating is going out, having fun and getting to know different guys, not getting a bad reputation by giving them what they "want". So go ahead see other people, if it works out with this other guy later great, if not that could be great too, at least you'll know what your looking for and the type opf guy that you like best.
Good luck!
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I need advice! Iam a female and 15 years old. Me and my boyfriend have been dating for over a year now. My parents did not care about me dating him at first but now all of a sudden my dad wont let me talk to him, and i still love him so what should i do??? (link)
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Dad's are funny that way. At first Im sure he thought it was a harmless relationship. However as things progressed and the relationship lasted I'm sure he now has the normal Father fears. First he's afraid that his little girl is growing up. Second, all Dad's remember what they were like and what they thought about at 15 years old. And he KNOWS what your boyfriend is thinking. You need to sit down with Daddy and Honestly ask for his advice, listen to what he says then assure him that you understand and appreciate his point of view. Tell him that what ever YOU decide to do, you will take his advice into consideration and that you appreciate having a caring father. Beieve me, it will score some brownie points and perhaps make him see what a mature daughter he has, and may let you make more of your own "good decisions"
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