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Will it work after the baby?
I'm 18, and my child is due on March 3rd. I'm really excited about this, but the problem is with the father.
Don't get me wrong--I really love him, but I'm scared we leaped into everything too soon.
We were dating for 3 months when I found out I was pregnant. I was scared to tell him, but he was so supportive, and he ended up absolutely ecstatic about it once we'd both been reassured about some things. We're engaged now, and things are going great.
But, that's the problem.
I think things are too good, and that once the baby is born that things might fall apart. I really want to talk to him about this, but I don't know how to approach it.
Any help is more than appreciated.
Thanks for your time.
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Well there is no way of knowing if your relationship will withstand a child. Even people who have been togethar for many years question that when expecting a baby. Im sure he has the same worries so just sit and talk it out with him. Things will change when the baby comes but if the relationship is strong and ment to be it will work out for the both of you. Congrats and good luck.
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You definitely want to bring it up and discuss your concerns with him. Start now being honest and open. You will have a lot of challenges to face together so now is the time to begin with communication.
It CAN work out. I was in your shoes 23 years ago, were still together, and I would not change a thing. If you ever want to talk with someone who's been down the road your starting out on, you know where to find me.
Good luck and Love,
~E
PS, If you ever get the chance, listen to a song called "There goes my life" By Kenny Chesney
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It is really alot easier than you think.
See all expentant parents go thru this regardless of age; however, at your age the issues are normally certained around the relationship. You have to remember that you have 2 different things going on. The relationship and the parenthood. Never mix the 2. That is the mistake that people often make. Whether it be fighting or not fighting the 2 should never be mixed. Both men and women can make losy partners but excellent parents and vice versa. It may sound weird but very very true. Many people often forget this and think if a person is a losy partner than they are no good for parenthood.
Now having said this remember that being a parent to be means that you just have to do things that might be uncomfortable this includes talking.
I suggest some TV or a Movie, some food and privacy. Then just sit down and talk. Let him now that you just want to share what you're thinking. THAT IS ALL. Don't present it with some expectations, this way whatever he says he can say with the freedom to know that he doesn't even have to respond. This will help you get a better sense of his thoughts instead of some stressed out pressured answer that he thinks he has to come up with quickly. Make Sense?
You might even consider setting your wedding date for when the baby is a year old. This way you will both know that the other agreed to the marriage with an open hert and mind. not a sense of duty or obligation.
I hope this helps. Let me know how it goes.
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hey well to me things seem to being going great. just because you love your life and think its the best it has ever been before doesnt nessasarily mean that things will go downhill from after the baby is born. keep your head up and be thankful that things are going this well. cait ♥
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Are you one of those people that when things are finally going great in your life, you cant enjoy it cuz your waiting for the bottom to fall out? Relax and thank your lucky stars that he is being so supportive of you and your expected arrival. If you do feel uneasy about how things might be after the baby's born, just casually bring up the subject. Baby's are wonderful and yet, stressful. Explain to him that your a lil worried that with the stress of the new baby that things between you and him might get rocky? Best of Luck...
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If things are going good why would you think things all the sudden would change,Your fiance knows that there is a child comin in a few weeks and it bein so close i think he would of changed a little bit by now.. Yes! i think you do need to talk to him.. Just talk to him alone like before going to bed or something..Ask maybe how he things are going to change even if you`ve already talked about.. Seriously hun if he didn`t want anything to do with you or this baby he would of been gone a long time ago.. And also this could be you bein a little bit nervous and some what insecure.. Just try and think positive.. Congradulations!! And i hope you the best!! ♥Dez
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People like to scare expectant parents.
I don't know why, but they do.
"You'll never get any sleep, ever again."
"Say goodbye to sex."
"Look forward to being broke for the rest of your life."
"Babies kill romance."
It just goes on and on. Well, here's a piece of advice from a parent: don't believe them. Your lives WILL be different, and there will be things that you'll have less of. But love, and romance, don't have to be one of them.
The best way to talk about it, is to TALK to him about it. You're engaged. You're having a baby together. You really need to be able to talk; believe me, that will be a HUGE asset after the baby is born! So sit down with him, and talk about your worries. Try not to let the conversation dwell on just the scariest possibilities, but don't be afraid to look at everything that's bothering you.
You might want to make a pact with him: set aside some special time for just the two of you, every week. Let someone from your families look after the baby for a few hours, and spend some time together. That's vital to keeping a marriage happy and successful.
You might also want to consider trading off weekend mornings. Sometimes everyone needs a break, a little alone time, so perhaps you could both work out a deal where he gets to sleep a couple of hours late one morning, and you get to sleep in the other morning. Or not sleep; that time should be your own, for you to do whatever you want to do.
Together time, and "me" time, are both really important. That's easy to forget after a baby is born.
I wish you the best of luck. And just so you know: having a baby is the most incredible thing in the world. Six months from now, you won't BELIEVE how empty your pre-baby life seems to you.
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While none of us can fully advise you, since we don't know your fiance, it really sounds as if you don't have anything to worry about. I understand your concern- three months isn't that long to have been dating, and the pregnancy was rather sudden. Having said all that , though, it sounds as if you have really struck lucky in your fiance- we hear so many stories about selfish and irresponsible men, that to hear one about someone really kind and commited makes a refreshing change. I think that you're just experiencing pre-natal nerves-your hormones will ineveitably be affected by your pregnancy. Just keep on the way you've been doing, and you'll be fine. Good luck with the birth!
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