Member Since: June 30, 2014
Answers: 133
Last Update: June 29, 2016
Visitors: 5923
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I daydream a lot and I did a little research and I am not sure if it is a maladaptive daydreaming. I think it becoming a problem because I don't like pain. However, when I have a painful experience I create a scenario in my head. The scenario is even more painful but I am in control of what happens. During these daydream I get emotional because they are very painful experience but it worse than the pain I am going through. It my way to escape and process my emotion. I can cry without dealing with my actually emotionally pain. (link)
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Hi sweetie,hey daydreaming is a wonderful thing
Our minds can easily play trick on us too and sometimes we get caught up in our daydream and they take us away from reality.
Rest assured,you are not alone.I too dealt with it for awhile.When I start daydreaming I immediately snap my fingers,immediately I come out of my daydream.Getting use to this habit will help nip it in the bud!
Take care doll!
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Hey , um I'm 18 years old , next year im supposed to be in college and i don't know which major ill be in , When i 5 i started using computers and i loved computers.As i grew up , i became a Graphic designer through home experience (Photoshop,Maya,max,flash 8,unity3D), its my passion.Where i from , only 4 or 3 private(VERY EXPENSIVE!) universities offer computer graphics major.When i turned 14 i began to like computer science and coding , though I'm not good at it as much as computer graphics.A lot of colleges here offer Computer science , i like it and all but its pretty difficult plus i never tried programming before.So what should i go for Computer science or computer graphics ?? Thank you (link)
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Pick watever you feel is best for you! Who says you cant pursue 2 degrees? Its very possible,and if you can balance it,you can do it! Take care!
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19,F.
I moved to a new city recently for university and I met a man there. We got on almost instantly and we started texting, calling and seeing each other regularly. He would come to spend time with me after work and I would go and see him after Uni.
this lead me to believe he liked me- calling for 4 hours at a time, texting all day..
I don't mind this and I don't find him annoying- i just don't understand what he wants, as he has a girlfriend that he is supposed to marry but hasn't yet due to family issues or something(i don't know the story well).. at first he referred to us as friends but carried on flirting with me and eventually kissed me. so the second time it happened I told him it would have to stop as it can't be an accident twice, and that i didnt want to develop feelings for him if he is going to go and get married to his girlfriend in the end and I be left with nothing.
he agreed,A week passed and we ended up seeing each other again but this time we slept together and it was absolutely perfect for me i could genuinely be with him as a boyfriend and am starting to develop stronger emotions toward him but i was left feeling confused and frustrated once again. I thought that contact would stop after we slept together and he had 'got what he wanted' but he still speaks to me every day, calls me and invites me out with him. I don't understand this because I would love to just go for it as i really really like him and can see myself being with him but do I really want to risk my emotions when hes got a girlfriend ? someone said he might be using me as a backup incase this planned marriage fails.. but I'm not sure. just cant stand this not knowing any longer- and I don't want to speak to him again about it since i already did ! (link)
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Oh no!! Honey,run! Grab those Lay's and head for the hills!
Why? Because he's cheating on the woman he is supposed to marry with you? What would happen if he married her,do you think he will still keep seeing you? I dont mean that to be harsh,I mean that in the sense that you need to think long term here.
In fact,he is the one who has a choice to make.
He i being dishonest to you,and his 'girlfriend'
I hope for your sake,he isnt just fooling around because he doesnt want to get married yet and likes playing the field.
You need to sit down with him and talk to him and let him know you have feelings for him,and he must make a choice,you or his girlfriend,this cant go like this,and sooner or later,his girlfriend will want to know what her boyfriend is up to,and or may find out about you eventually.Take care doll!
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So me and my ex still like each other but he says he doesn't want to go back out but then he also said we might be going back out next year and I'm so confused on whether I should continue to like him I should just move on to someone else because I feel he thinks im just there like a toy but I'm not and I don't want to say anything because he takes things that include love or anything like that VERY SERIOUS so please tell me what should I do?????! (link)
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Oh honey,only you can make that choice for you,however,if you guys split over differences and feelings,there is no need to try again.Alot of the times it just doesnt work out for various reasons.
And to be honest,it doesnt seem like he really knows what he wants either
He could be saying lovey dovey stuff to you,just keep you near,just to keep you around.And that isnt always cool
If you want to give this another try,talk it out and see if you are on the same page. And always be honest with each other!
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I am currently engaged to be married... Happily engaged, if I might add. We're in the middle of planning our wedding next year... While looking at wedding invitations online... My ex, who holds a soft spot to my heart... Calls me. Begging me to come back to him. The last time I heard from him was 8 months ago. He has tore my world apart for 2 years this past October. I'm confused, because although I love my fiance, my heart is being dragged towards my ex. What should I do? Who should I pick? (link)
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Ouch!! Ouch! Triple Ouch!
Oh honey,what can I say?
Sweetheart,take a weekend road trip,just by yourself to clear your mind,and decide what your heart wants
You are engaged,and I assume you are happy yes?
First,think about the man you are engaged to.
Does he make you happy? Does he treat you well?
I he fully comitted? Do you see forever with him,plus a family?
Second,think of why you and your ex split in the first place. Was it a fight? Was it mutual? Did he cheat? Were you guys arguing or not getting along? Think about those things.It sounds he left you,forgive me if I am wrong there!
This is a lifelong choice,and honey,I cannot make that choice,and noone can either,only you dear one,you must choose what your heart decides and what it wants.
You must also realize,that someone will get their heart broken. And that will suck very badly on all counts.
Let's just say,you left your fiancee for your ex,do you any guarantee that you wont split up again down the road? How long will it last? What happens if he dumps you? You will end up alone,without any comfort.
If you choose your fiancee,a man who does love you,you will have a life long committment,he loves you!
Your heart needs to make a choice,and personally,you should cut off contact with the ex,I know that sounds harsh.But if he left you,he is liable to do so again.In fact he may only be calling you because he is alone and doesnt want to be alone,and he has noone else,all that is a big possibilty.
Weekend road trip my dear! Take the time out! It is a big desicion!
Also,pray,even if you dont believe,pray that you will make the right choic!e!!
Be blessed dear one!
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I am 19 years old, and female. From being 17 I met a man who was 28 and about to be married. As we got to know each other he told me he had feelings for me and that he thought he would cheat on his wife with me after the wedding when I was 18. I laughed it off as him being stupid and for other reasons we ended up not having contact for a month. When we met again, he was already married and I had turned 18, things started to go back to how they were and that is how the affair started. After a few months I told him I didn't want to have feelings for someone that was married and couldn't be with me properly and tried to end it but The feelings were already there and he begged me to stay.
12 months down the line and a lot of heartache later, I have moved out of my family home to study and live in a city where he owns property. I see him very regularly but he is still married. He had promised in the past to get a divorce but never did and always made ridiculous excuses to me. He said until I show HIM some loyalty, he won't leave his wife for me, and that because he caught me speaking with other guys (innocently) that I'm untrustworthy and he can't leave his (loyal) wife for me. He has some seriously severe insecurity issues. He puts a tracking app on my iphone and turns up at my apartment out of the blue to check up on me but he doesn't treat me like a girlfriend more like a pet to keep at home. After a year of this emotionally exhausting debacle I genuinely can't go on anymore as it's making me ill. I am failing at my studies and I started using drugs to forget about the painful feelings. I did at one point fall in love with him but he has destroyed my confidence, emotional self esteem and nerve. He has hit me on two occasions out of jealousy and he regularly emotionally bullies me, leaving me and coming back as if it's a game. I don't know how to end things without causing a big argument/fuss and losing everyone. we have a lot of mutual friends in the city i study in, i feel quite isolated when hes not in my life as he cuts off some of my other relationships as well, but i have long since given up on any hope of being with him and am starting to come to my senses about whether I even want to anymore.
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Hi sweetheart! I give you all my love and sympathy during this time.You are in a very difficult position and it feels like your stuck,but let's see what we can do
This man is dangerous. He has used you,abused,and he has gone too far!! It should have been reported that he hit you!! In fact,that would have ended his affair with you and also,his wife would have found out.
This man wants to fool around,he wants to have his cake and eat it too,controlling and manipulative.
What a scumbag!! Sweetie,you don't need that!
Honey,he will never his wife. He will not. Men like to have affairs and flings on the side when they are married,because they feel they WILL NEVER GET CAUGHT. Can it be much of a bigger lie?
Also,it may be very possible that his wife knows about you already,women have intuition. Know what I mean?
This man treating you more like an object rather than a human being. SHAME ON HIM!!
He ruined and cut off relationships as well? Oh tsk tsk.
He put a tracking app did he? Wow,thats really low. Let's do a check list of what you can do here:
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1.Go to the nearest cell phone store and remove tracking app
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2.Buy a disposable pre paid phone,and leave iphone at home
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3.Clear your bank account and shut it down.
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4.If possible,use prepaid gift cards if you need credit cards of any type.
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5.Just pack your car and drive.
Honey,you have been in the emotional ring,and he has given no thought to your heart and feelings emotions,he is the loser,and he will get caught soon enough,and yes,he should pay for what he has done to you.No matter what happens sweetheart,none of this will be easy
You have suffered long enough,and enough is enough
Look at yourself in the mirror,and have a heart to heart with yourself. Yes,talking to yourself isnt weird at all,in fact its healthy and clears the mind. Ask yourself,do I deserve better? Darling,you really do.
You are a human being,with a heart,soul,blood and feelings,your heart has been taken by a man who sees it as a toy to play with. He has some balls calling himself a man.
You my dear,are a great lady,who deserves a really wonderful man,who love and treat you right,to care for you,and look after you,and be with you,and just love you for who you are because you are someone beautiful and special.
Sweetie,get out of it now. Go to a Safe Haven place,if you dont neccesarily want to just pack up and leave.Which I believe is the best thing for you.
Got to a place and go somewhere you havent been before. Like San Fransico,or somewhere nice,to clear your mind,and to help you heal.Your heart needs healing and mending. Ive been where you are,I know first hand,how hard it to leave,its very hard.But once you do leave,you will feel a sense of peace even though you are hurting. You will heal.You will get over it in due time.Right now,you,you yourself as an individual must be brave and be your own hero honey.
The man of your life will come by,he will love you so much,as you deserve. What you expirienced was not love,rather just a psycho,who should be locked away so he can never do this to anyone else.
If you leave,tell no one.No friends,and certainly,not Sir Douchebag!
Leave your iphone there if possible,erasing all contacts,or just destroy the phone,and get a prepaid cell phone.
Please think about this,and set up a plan,and follow through and stick with it. You will be okay sweetheart,I do so promise.
Take time to pray too!
Yes.God (YAH) does hear us,and He loves you so much,ask Him to help you also,get through this,and heal,heal your wounds and your heart.
Be blessed dear one,werever you are,and I pray the very best for you!
Please feel free to write me directly should you need anymore advice!
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I'm a 14 year old and I play a lot on this gaming website. I met a guy (Who claims he's 26). I claim that I'm 18. I never say my real age and never will due to safety reasons. I just feel so uncomfortable talking to him, but yet I feel emotionally attached to him. He's never asked me for my address or anything personal like that, but he's told me that he's on parole and all that and I kind of help him to make him feel better. I know I shouldn't lie and all that, but it's safety reasons. I've heard his voice before (Microphone) but he hasn't heard mine. What should I do? I feel kind of "unsafe", but I feel that about everything since I have a panic disorder. I want to just end the talking by just not starting conversation, but me and him play the game a lot and end up starting conversation. (link)
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Hi sweetheart!Oh dear,this is tricky. I can put a few choices,and you can do what you feel is best.
But first off,lying can get you in all kinds of trouble,sometimes a small lie,can lead to a bigger lie,and you need to make another lie to cover up the previous lies. I think you learned a valuable lesson here,always be honest,honesty is not only the best policy,its the ONLY policy,always be honest with you.We not only lie to others,we lie to ourselves too when we do so.
Sweetie,youre a young lady,and you will make all kinds of mistakes and choices in this life,and you must use your best judgement to make choices,its all part of life.
A man who is an adult,especially on parole talking to a minor is a very very serious ordeal and is extremely dangerous. This man could have many identies,all kinds of things.Be careful who you talk to online. You say you feel uncomfortable,that is your gut and conscience telling you thats it wrong talking to him.
Now then,sweetheart,lets go over your options.
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1.Block him from your gaming site.Just cut it off completely
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2.Tell your parents,I know this may sound out of line for you,but if you have parents who truly love you,they may get upset,but your safety will be their priority
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3.Do steps 1 & 2 above.
Sweetie,they will no easy way to do this,but be strong,and you will make it through!! I promise!
Feel free to write me here!!
Be blessed!
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hey, am an 18 years old highschool senior girl, am not confortable with the way i look i mean i know am not ugly and many people told me am beautiful as well but thats not the issue am worried about i am very slim girl. and all my friends are all bigger and curvier than me, they always makes fun of me well they don't mean it in a bad way its just a joke to zem, but it makes me feel bad about my self and the boys as well see me as some skinny girl, so they don't respect me as a girl and i have seen many boys after my friends but not after me ; well i searched on the internet and i found out i need to work out, build muscle,but thats not what i want i don't want to be muscley girl i just want to weight normal, and look normal am just tired of being called the thin and baby face girl always,even 14 years old cousin looks bigger than me i don't really know what to do about it p/s i need help/advice!! (link)
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Your friends get an ''F'' for joking about you! Tsk tsk! They need a time out!
Sweetheart,confidence goes a long long way!
The important thing,is that you dont pretend to be someone you are not.Never change yourself for anyone.Only make changes for you!!
No,stay away from muscles! Who wants to be a lumpy mattress?? Not I said the cat!
Eating healthy,eating lots of greens and drinking plenty of water will be great for your health
Excersise at least an hour day.Start slowly like a 20 minute walk at first,then gradually build up higher.
Also,check out Seventeen magazines or Seventeen.com for excersises that you can do,and also how to be fit and healthy!!
Every body is different,we are all created differently.Every metabolism is different also
Your body as you grow older will make some changes,and these are perfectly normal
You can get clothes that maybe accentuate your figure,you could wear belts really nice,pencil skirts,skinny jeans with boots,or a mini skirt with knee high boots. Youre skinny,so you can pull off anything!!
Also,trendy scarves,and cute socks too! Shop at thrift stores,and get clothes that compliment your figure!!!
Thanks doll for writing!! Be blessed!
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It was recently suggested to me to do pairs ice skating ((I usually do singles and briefly did ice dance)) and I think it's beautiful so I'd love to try it, but I'm worried about my height and weight. I am 14 years old (almost 15), 5'5" and 116 pounds. What do you think? (link)
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I used to do figure skating!!! I did dance. Synchronized. And free style. You are perfect my dear for pairs skating!! If you exercise you can maintain your healthy weight because your partner has to throw you. Hold you. Lift you and catch you. I think your weight and height are excellent. Make sure your partner is at least 5" 10. Perfect balance!! Good luck!!
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21/f, 27/m
Here is some of my relationship history: I have been cheated on multiple times in my past. I've been looking for patterns in the guys I have been dating and they were all different. I saw no patterns. I've been lied to and hurt a lot by different guys.
My current relationship. We're just dating right now. We're only seeing each other (it's like we're exclusive but we just don't have the label). I think he may be waiting for me to tell him that I'm ready for an exclusive relationship. He told me that he's on board if I am. I'm not sure if he's saying that just to be in a relationship or if he actually sees a potential relationship with me. As you can see, I'm kind of doubting him.
We've gone through a few problems and worked them out. For example, he was on a dating app and I asked him to get off of it because I felt like it was disrespectful towards me. He agreed and now he stopped using it.
I felt like we haven't been communicating as often as I'd like (just simply knowing how his day was, etc.) And I think we're currently working on that.
I haven't been able to tell him things about my life because I felt like he came off as judgmental, so he tried his best not to.
I didn't like how he kept bringing up random facts about his ex-girlfriend. Now, he asks before bringing her up if something reminds him of something that happened.
He hasn't lied to me about anything and we have been working through our past problems but yet, for some reason... I have this feeling that there is something wrong. I can't trust him. I don't trust him and I don't know what to do. I've asked myself these following questions:
1) Do I trust him? No.
2) Has he done anything that made him not trust me? He was using that dating app while we were together (but not anymore) and he kept talking about his ex-girlfriend (not as much anymore), he's a private person who doesn't like to talk about himself a lot (?), he's admitted to not telling me everything because he's a private person but gets me curious if he's actually hiding something.
3) Has he ever lied to me? No. I don't think he would, either. If I confront him about something, he'll tell me the truth from what I've experienced. I just don't want to constantly confront him about things for him to tell me the truth.
4) What makes me feel this way? I'm not sure. Maybe it's because I don't trust him for whatever reason?
He knows how I feel about cheating and how much I dislike those who cheat. He has been cheated on before and he knows that it sucks. But I noticed that whenever I bring up the subject, he doesn't say much about it, cuts off the conversation and tells me he's tired and goes to sleep (considering our conversation is sometimes at night). I'm not sure if that's something I should look into, maybe he is seeing someone else on the side, even though he has told me he isn't... I'm not sure if I'm paranoid and insecure because of my past relationships and I'm bringing that into my current one, or if this is my gut instinct telling me to get out now.
What should I do? How do I get rid of this feeling of paranoia? I've felt this way in other relationships, too, even when I had no reason to. (link)
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Hi honey!
Its sounds to me as if your gut is telling you to run away.See sometimes our minds and body take some type of reaction when our gut is telling us,to get out of the relationship.
In fact,you are not paranoid,you are just cautious.And thats not a bad thing.
But if you are always in that mode of thinking this and that thats bad about and over him,your gut is telling you,this guy is not it
You want to feel happy,secure and respected,not be suspectful or doubt anything.
That is a relationship is not normal.
And you need to do and feel what is right to you.If you feel something is out of line,sit down and think about where that thought came from.
He doesnt like confrontation which is not a good sign,because down the road if you stay with this guy,it will cause problems and arguments because he is not upfront and honest.
Sit down,and have a re-talk with your sweetie.
Tell him,that at times you have doubts and worries
You both need to communicate and make sure you are the same level in understanding that you are on the same page!
Be blessed!
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I am JeanieBeanie. I'm 14 and have a lot of stress at the moment and have had it since the beginning of the summer. For one thing I just lost a close friend, because she was becoming insanity slutty and taking my other friends away from me by dating them and controlling them, as well as getting closer to my girl friends to pull them away from me for no apparent reason. Another reason is I have stress concerns my mother. Her brothers and sisters have Huntington's Disease. All except for her and one of her brothers. She lost her big sister in April, we had her funeral in June. Also she lost her older brother this summer. His funeral was in August. We are expecting to loose my moms little brother next and shortly. Along with me getting random anxiety attacks which has been triggering my acid reflex, causing me to miss school. Also, I'm not sure if my boyfriend still loves me as much as he did a month ago. I could really use some advice on how to relieve myself from some stress. Do you have any helpful methods? (link)
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Hi honey,
Im so sorry to hear all that you have going on.You dont ever need to go through things alone!My anxiety is very very severe and mystress is through the celing! Pesky stress!
I reccommend,for the night time,that you drink some chamomile tea an hour before bedtime,to help calm you.Getting plenty of sleep will help!
You know what else will help?
Clicking on this link below!! 25 ways to relieves stress and axiety!!
Be blessed dear one!
http://www.stop-anxiety-panic-attack.com/blog/25-ways-to-relieve-anxiety
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My boyfriend and I have been dating a few months and this is a social media questions I guess. We never put we were in a relationship which never bothered me I really didn't care he never uses his Facebook I use mine really just to post pictures for family that lives further away. Well last night we were sitting together and he wanted me to change mine to in a relationship I was fine with I changed it it obviously tagged him in when it asked who I was in a relationship with well there is this girl he friends with whom has feelings for him he doesn't have feeling for her but they have been friends for years she's friends with his mom that's how they meet well she does gets drunk all the time does pills etc just got released from the hospital because she tried to kill her self and says it's over him well less then 24 hours she said if he didn't remove it from Facebook she was gonna kill her self and I said does that mean u want me to take it down or post more he said don't post more which I'm not a horrible person I wouldn't of posted anything else to begin with and he said no about taking our relationship down 2 seconds later he said maybe I should take it down. Well I don't care about social media but he wanted to make it public about us being together and it felt good and then feels likes it ripped right back out. Not sure if their is a question here just really looking for advice I feel miserable I don't even want to talk to him because I feel I'm going to say something stupid about it (link)
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Your boyfriend.
Your boyfriend needs to get a restraining order,or run for the hills.If he could do both that would be great.
Let's talk about this other girl.She is seriously desperate for attention,and people are her character will go to the extremes to get the person they are after attention.Why?
In your case,she wants his attention,not anyone else's.The reason for this,is because he's an off the market guy and she is having a hard time dealing with that.Going to the extreme of taking pills and being in the hospital calls for pyschiatric help.Im serious.This could proove costly,and even deadly if she does not get any attention.
Her actions are also very selfish,and has no thought of you or anything or anyone else.
I have dealt with people of her character personally and its very delicate to approach,because what they have going on,to the,seems justifible.It isnt.
Its very scary and dangerous.
Whats wrong,is that your boyfriend needs to be on your side.See,what he's doing,by telling YOU take your status down,is caving in to this other woman's need which should not be allowed.His actions show,that her feelings count more than yours,and this other woman,was counting on him feeling guilty,so he could cave in and give her what she wants
Tough luck! Leave it up!
He is with YOU! Not with her!!
Pull him aside,and maybe explain to him some of what Ive said,because he may not be fully aware of the whole picture.You both need to be an agreement of what must be done here.You can;t hang on a balance just because this woman has obviously emotional issues!
Be blessed!
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I'm 27 years old and I never had a lot of friends, but when I was younger I did have core friends I hung out with a lot. I have begun to realize that I have no friends. The only friend I have is my boyfriend and one friend that lives 400 miles away.
I tried meeting new people on meetup.com. I was part of a woman's group on there. But, I left because I met 3 different women that were verbally abusive and would criticize me. One actually became violent towards me.
I've tried having work friends, but it never seems to last long. At my current job, I always hear about people's BBQ's and other events, which many of the staff went to, but I wasn't invited.
I've tried to reach out to people who I thought I was friends with, but they always make excuses why they can't hang out with me. Then I see them on facebook hanging out with other friends, who are mutual friends.
The thing that bothers me is that I don't know why people don't want to hang out with me. I'm a pretty positive and helpful person. I like to joke around and have fun.
I reconnected with someone from when I was in college, but she also stopped talking with me. Whenever I send a message, she doesn't respond.
I've had a few friends not invite me to their wedding, which is sad since I thought we were close.
I'm not much of a phone person. I like to meet people in person.
I've always wanted a best friend, someone I can hang around with all the time. Trust and know that they are always with me. Are these friendships just in the movies? I see a lot of people I know who have friendships like this. I wish I knew what I could do to make it happen. (link)
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Hi honey!! I know how you feel!! What bummer no one wants to hang out with you! The people you describe seem like wimps anyways and they are missing out!
Their loss,and not yours!
This day in age,meeting people is fun,but can also be very dangerous,especially when its face to face the first time,and you have never even met these people,much less know their name
Waltz on over to a curly hair guys website,tah-dah! Facebook! Yes,Facebook,the lovely white f!
F should stand for friends!
When I got on Facebook,I only added my mom and my sister,any extended family was out of the picture,because frankly they are all a bunch of weirdos!
Now the,what are your hobbies? I became an Adele fanatic,and I joined and liked some pages of her,and made conversation with some fans,and that was 4 years ago,and we are still a tight knot group,we talk on the phone,we talk almost every day!
Even if you are not obbsessed with Adele,you may have intrests,and you can type them in Ye Olde Search Engine on Facebook,from then on,leave comments,or compliments and get the ball rolling!! Dont be shy!!
You can even,if you wish,find people in your own zip code or area code,if you prefer face to face contact!!
Be blessed sugar!
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Ok today this guy messaged me telling me that this other guy was gossiping about me saying that I will "never date anyone" and that I friendzone every guy that gets close to me. Which isn't true im just the type of girl that isn't particulary easy and because of the immature guys in my school im not in a rush to date them. I don't throw myself at boys and I don't try to get attention by wearing skin tight clothes and showing off my goods like other girls do. Its just not me. I have had guys hit on me but I never was interested because they were either immature, players, saw them as a friend or they had recently broke up with one of my close girl friends. Im not desperate but I would date someone. Its just I want a mature, respectful,guy that cares about his grades Is that too much to ask? The guy I actually liked was all those things but he is a rude person and he talked about me as well even when he barely knew me saying he "didn't get me" or I was "odd" which hurt. a lot. Now this guy keeps on kiking me(he's a freshmen)asking me all these questions and making comments like "I don't seem like I like anyone in the school" or "I friendzone everyone" or asking me why im not dating any of my guy friends as if he is mad or something. Im kind to people at school and I tend to have people come to me whenever they are going through something I try to help them out (just like you guys) im not popular but I have friends (guys mostly but girls too) what exactly is wrong being friends with people instead of trying to make a boyfriend out of everyone you meet? Ive been called gay by boys and kind of ridiculed for not having one boyfriend yet. Im not self centered at all I just have self respect to not be whoring around and talking about sex all the time. I have crushes and whatever but im not totally boy crazy and drool over every cute boy in my school like some of my friends do. All of my friends have been in relationships so I guess im the oddball out of all of them. People get so caught up with me dating someone that they offer to hook me up with guys that they know. I just don't understand why everyone cares so much about it. Its like im wrong for being this way. Another factor would also be my insecurity issues. I don't feel like im pretty or good looking despite what others says. I just think so low about myself, but i don't tell anyone because i don't want the attention and compliments that I would have a hard time accepting. Every time someone does I think people compliment me for my own benefit or when they hit on me they have no one else to hit on so they hit on me. How can I help people understand me and how can I deal with all of this criticism? Im a sophomore in highschool btw.
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Hi sweetie!
Let's start from the top.
Youre a sophmore in high school
And boys around your age,are still imature and will mature much later than girls do!
Its just the circle of life
You may wonder why women date men who are at least 3 years older,or much older.That is because of the maturity level.
See,men don't usually understand anything about girls,what they feel,or start feeling about girls,is the raging hormones that come hopping along at their age.Their minds are filled with curiosity about girls. And being with someone much older will benefit you down the road
There is nothing wrong with being single!! In fact,I applaud you for being smart and not being caught up to be ''IN'' just because ''Everyone else is doing it,everyone else has a boyfriend/girlfriend''
Let me ask you about these punks that pick on you,how much you want to guess that many of them may be single.They have their insecurities too dahling.
In fact,in high school,its in a stage of transitioning from teen to adult,and people usually spend the time getting to know who they are and thinking about their futures
So shame on those people making fun
This freshman,let's call him Sir Dork,has no right harrassing you,what's it to him whether you have a boyfriend or not? Pff! Does he have a girlfriend? Chances are he dont have one!
That also calls for people who pick on you
You are very smart for wanting someone who can respect and love you back and fulfill needs for you as a human being.
Waiting is always worth the wait.
So don;t feel insecure,you have no need to be
Keep standing your ground,and of any more harrassing goes on,talk to a school counselor and the principal,often,picking on someone,can lead to bullying,and then things can get much worse! Be blessed!
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I am 25 years old and I wrote on here a couple of times about how my cousins husband is like my dad but to make a long story short my cousin and her husband are going through a divorce and I wrote on here if it would be okay to keep in contact with him but I decided to ask her first and so I asked her and she said she would prefer if I didn't keep in c ontact because g e would use me to find out info about her so I haven't talked to him but my problem now is that he keeps trying to call me and add me on fb and I have been ignoring him but he won't stop should I tell her or just keep ignoring him and stay out of it or should I text him and tell him to stop trying to contact me ? What should I do? I don't want her to think I am talking to him when I am not because I think he is the type of person wh o would try to make it look like I have when I have not. What should I do? Please help me. I don't want this to affect my relationship with my cousin because we are like sisters and I don't want him to ruin it. (link)
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Ouch! Can you say harrassment? He gets an ''F'' for the day dahling!
Your cousin should take a first place spot here
Just tell him you are dealing with things,and please to not to contact you for the time being.
If he keeps harrassing you and trying to add you as a friend,please,use the block button!! It's your friend for life
Your cousin really needs you right now,so your focus should be on her,and helping out and being as best of a friend as you can!
So tell him,for now,to let you be
Be blessed!
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21/f
Long story short. I have been cheated on a total of six times by six different guys. I have been telling myself that it's not my fault, it says something about them and not about me... But it has happened so often, it's starting to become harder for me to believe that.
Usually when people cheat, it's because they're not getting the physical or emotional needs met... I've been thinking about all of them and I've tried to reach all of those needs of my boyfriends. I've also always told them that I hate it when people cheat and if they were ever unhappy or upset with me, to talk to me about it--don't cheat on me. But yet, I still get cheated on and I feel betrayed.
I tried thinking about my childhood and my parents but there were no traces of cheating or trust issues in my family. Is it me? Am I the problem? Is that why I keep getting cheated on? (link)
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Hi doll!
Is it them and not you? Yes!
But also,are you seeing the same type of guy with the same characteristics?
While the guys may have been different,they may be the same type,same characteristics.
Sometimes,its easy to fall into,and when we get caught up in liking someone we don't always catch it right away.
Men in a relationship are sometimes afraid of a certain word. The ''C'' word,yes.
COMMITMENT
Men also,sometimes,like to play the field or just plain feel bored.
So,what type of man do you need?
One who is honest
One who respects you
One isnt afraid to commit
One who meets YOUR needs,you both need to fill each other's needs and wants
One who is understanding,and knows full well,if he were to ever cheat,ITS OVER!!
Love is a two-way street
It is not a give give give situation while he lays back and takes it all.
Because that is wrong,and un ethical
Date someone who you feel in your gut is right for you and dont jump into the water completely right away. If your gut tells you its wrong,and you should get out of it,you should.
Be blessed dear one!
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I am 22 years old and am dating this guy I know through a friend.I had known him since 2009 and met a couple of times. I Had heard a lot about him from my best friend. the sad part is he left for europe to pursue higher studies. we are currently in a long distance relationship and will mostly be for the next one year.He keeps telling me that he really likes me and when we are on the phone we talk real dirty. He told me that distance doesnt matter even though we started a relationship like this. He seems quite honest about his feelings and talks about having kids in the future. my track record in relationships haven't been exactly great.I sometimes feel if its stupid to start a relationship like this or should I just go with the flow.I really like the guy and I think it does have potential to turn into something solid in the near future.I don't want to keep bringing up the distance issue as I don't want him to feel m not in for a relationship. he seems confident and talks about being together in the future all the time. Does this sound stupid? (link)
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Hi there!
Ah,no,it doesnt stupid!! Take that comment out yo system!
Now the,you make variable points! Bravada!!
Think of a few things first/Ask yourself these questions
1.Do you see your life without him?
2.Is really comitted?
3.Do he see you in his future?
4.Is he coming home soon enough,that it makes seeing him again worth waiting for?
5.Could you see forever with him?
If you answered yes,to most of these questions,then you may want to pursue it
You are young sweetheart,and life will give you many oppourtunities that you may or may not be 100% sure you can make,or may not want to deal with
All part of growing up!
Also,listen to your gut! If you at any time,don't feel something is right in your relationship,stop,take a time out and figure out why you feel something is wrong,if you ignore it,your gut will nudge you,until you deal with it.
Be blessed in whatever your heart decides! Be blessed!!
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Well I kinda hate my life right now. My step dad is much of a jerk who verbally abuses me time to time. He is a jerk and my mom doesn't know how to divorce even though he threatned to beat up my brother and choke my other. He also charged at me at this one resort and threw a coke bottle at my head and ran at me and tried to hurt me so they got separated and GOT BACK TOGETHER THE SAME DAY. also my parents don't buy me anything. It is not a financial problem I know this because they spend all this money on themselves. They buy pointless stuff for my sister and themselves. Meanwhile im left sitting in the dog pound with hardly any clothes to start of the school year and nothing else. They also say I cant do anything. Like I always mess up everything which makes me want to punch a wall. The clothes I have now I either bought myself or are my brothers hand me downs. And they are so cheap. Also they discourage me to be healthy and I try my hardest but it just didnt work. Please I need advice. (link)
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Hi sugar!
Im sorry to hear about this! I shake my head at this! Very wrong and unfair!
Yes,your step dad is up to know good.Anyone who threatens,or abuses is a bad person,and they should not get away with behavior such as this!
I reccommend you get a hold of Social Services or Child Protective services.Please,when typing in the search engine,to type ''CHILD SOCIAL SERVICES (Type in the state you live in)
Trust me,the problem will be solved,your step dad may say and claim you are lying,but assure them the things that are happening to you.
Also,please know how you are treated IS NOT YOUR FAULT,even if they tell you,IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT!!
If ever your step dad hits you,or tries something,call the police!! They will come right in and fix things
Do you have a camera? Its very possible to take photos of any evidence or incidents that happen.Especially since there is a chance they ask if there is any proof this is going on.
Now,your wardrobe,have a phone book? Yellow Pages?
Many thrift stores carry good stuff!! Like St.Vincent De Paul,Goodwill Stores,Hope Hopice,Shepherds Gate and various places can help you!!
Be sure to look in that phone book,or Yellow Pages regarding Social Services or Child Protective Services
Dont tell your step dad you will call them,or it will make it worse.Just go ahead and call them.
Also,your family is put in such a dangerous spot,and its unfair,and unlwaful and someone could get seriously hurt
Be blessed,and hope I have helped!!
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My best friends gave my phone number to her good friend to talk to me! We used to text for around 6-7 months! He told her that he likes me and wants to ask me out! I also liked him but since he was going away for further studies, and it had been ages since I saw him, I was confused! But I still thought, we could date! The problem started when my best friend acted weird, she said she lost her best friends and we are illusions. She said it's weird for her to see her friends date (it was she who gave him my number). Things got way too complicated with her behavior and I didn't wanna go ahead! The guy and me decided to not go ahead as things got too complicated! It was he who told her that he likes me, I never initiated it, but still got stuck in between and got blamed! I need to get out of this and move on! How do I stop thinking about this? (link)
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Hi sugar! Im in the same boat as you *Sigh* Its not easy is it? Let me give you a hug across the screen and tell you its all right.Everything will be okay.
I know its not easy for you,but I think your best friend used some manipulation and maybe didnt want you guys to be together.
I suggest picking up a hobby,and find something you enjoy doing!
Like singing? Write a song and record it
Wanna be an actress? Take classes to help you,and get in a role!
Im giving you this advice,because Im on my way in Hollywood,and part of it was due,because I was in a position like yours!
God Bless!
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Well I did talk to him bout it
And like we dated for 5 months broke up on Sept 6
But ever since we broke up we are friends now
But the thing in really confused about is he's always giving hugs and kiss and always pulls me to sit near him
And our friends be tellin to go back out
He doesn't say anything and they say go back out with her she's ur gf and he be like she ain't my Gf
It makes me feel type of way around him like when he has that I'm not his gf more like ex gf but what type of ex still hugs & kisses their ex ?? (link)
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Hi doll,pull him aside privately and just have a talk.Or to casually bring it up in a conversation,say''Hey,I noticed that you give me lots of hugs and kisses,and I was curious,if you still like me? Sorry,I just feel confused'' something along those lines
Your ex may still have feelings for you,but is ashamed to admit it,or is too prideful to tell you,and maybe is waiting for the right time to say he likes you still.
Its all a possibility,but please try and ask him,and see where it goes
Be blessed
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