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my cousins going through a divorce
I am 25 years old and I wrote on here a couple of times about how my cousins husband is like my dad but to make a long story short my cousin and her husband are going through a divorce and I wrote on here if it would be okay to keep in contact with him but I decided to ask her first and so I asked her and she said she would prefer if I didn't keep in c ontact because g e would use me to find out info about her so I haven't talked to him but my problem now is that he keeps trying to call me and add me on fb and I have been ignoring him but he won't stop should I tell her or just keep ignoring him and stay out of it or should I text him and tell him to stop trying to contact me ? What should I do? I don't want her to think I am talking to him when I am not because I think he is the type of person wh o would try to make it look like I have when I have not. What should I do? Please help me. I don't want this to affect my relationship with my cousin because we are like sisters and I don't want him to ruin it.
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Talk about a broken triangle this is certainly one of them. The three of you are all hurting because their marriage did not workout. While it is true she is family and blood is thicker than water. You and her ex-husband have formed a relationship that is important to you. A father figure I assume you need as your own father, for various reasons, may not be in the picture.
No one knows why the ex-husband is trying to contact you. It could be he knows you need the father figure he has been to you and does not want you to lose that just because he and your cousin have divorced. It also could be as your cousin feels it may be so he can keep tabs on her. You won't know this until you talk with him.
I believe you need to find out why he is contacting you before you decide what to do about it. You can call or write him and ask why. IF it is because he wants to continue to be that father figure he has been to you. Then if you want to continue that relationship with him I would say it is permissible with certain ground rules in place.
Those ground rules would be specific to your cousin and any questions he might have or you being a messenger between them. OF course family events are off limits to him as your cousin would most like be there.
If he is in agreement to those rules then I believe if you are comfortable with them as well you can give it a try. If at any time it becomes uncomfortable for you then you stop seeing him.
You do tell your cousin so she knows and why you are seeing him. Assure her you are not a conduit in any way between them and if he attempts to make you one you will stop seeing him. You tell her that you need him in your life and why and this does not change in anyway your feelings or support for her.
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Ouch! Can you say harrassment? He gets an ''F'' for the day dahling!
Your cousin should take a first place spot here
Just tell him you are dealing with things,and please to not to contact you for the time being.
If he keeps harrassing you and trying to add you as a friend,please,use the block button!! It's your friend for life
Your cousin really needs you right now,so your focus should be on her,and helping out and being as best of a friend as you can!
So tell him,for now,to let you be
Be blessed!
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