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Nurse, Equine Business OwnerAge:
48Member Since:
January 15, 2006Answers:
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about
I am 48 years old (yes that's old compared to some of you).
I have worked in nursing and/or healthcare management positions for 24 years. Primarily OB, Neonatal, Mental Health, Occupational Health and Geriatrics. In Jan 2008 I started my own business to board horses and do equine/human education. I am also a certified dog trainer.
I've been around the block so to speak and seem to be always helping others. I've been told that the reason people seek me out for advice is that I am approachable and caring. But on the same token even though I consider the person's feelings. I tell it like I see it. I've dealt with people in trouble with the law, dysfunctional families such as those with abuse & marriage problems. Not to mention problems with employees and employers.
I don't ever claim to know it all, and always keep an open mind.
advice
Ok, this is kind of a weird situation but here goes...
My pony is lame and has been for the past year (a lot of different things which is now a pulled tendon) but was always provided with the medical attention he needed. Anywayz, for the past year I rode my trainer's mare leased her. She took me to my first show and we have come so far. Now my friend said that my pony (he is at her house) will be better in the next month. Recently, I've been trying to get unattached to my mare as I will have to stop riding her because I know it will be hard if I just abruptly have to stop with her. However, it's screwing up my riding. What do I do?
I think you've asked this question before. I would say if you are in the middle of showing the Mare, stick with her for the remainder of the season. This will also give the pony ample time to recover. I would start over with the pony next year.
I guess I don't understand what's screwing up your riding?
If you aren't quite used to the Mare, just keep practicing in no time you'll be in tune to each other.
my puppy is adorable but he can get very aggressive and bites a lot. Is there a way to make him stop?
Puppies are hardly ever agressive until they mature beyond 15 months. My guess is he is going through the normal "play biting" however, those little teeth are very sharp and they hurt. You shouldn't give the pup more attention as another reader suggested, you don't want to "approve" of this behavior. Each time he puts his mouth on you, even if it doesn't hurt. Reply with a very quick response, a high pitch "Ouch"!!! and jerk your hand..foot or whatever away. If it startles him he will quit biting and look at you to see what is going to happen next. Then instead of petting him, turn your back on him..no look-no touch--no talk. After 2 minutes if he is no longer biting or playing rough, you can give him attention again. If he bites or mouths again, repeat the same process. Everyone should practice this same response in order for it to work.
When pups behave badly, the litter mate or the Mother dog gives a quick correction and then do the avoidance behavior. This is what you will attempt to achieve. Puppies hate to be ignored, and this gives them the idea that their behavior is not acceptable.
Also, never play tug of war with your puppy as this reinforces the behavior, and make sure he has plenty of things that are safe to chew on such as a nylabone or a kong.
i recently went on a school trip and we stayed in a hotel. the last day we were there, the left side of my bottom started hurting really bad. it was really sore, but there wasnt a rash or bruise or anything. When i got home i noticed some small bumps on my bottom that are really sore to touch and hurt really bad. I sat on the edge of the bathtub in the hotel when i shaved my legs and i was thinking that could be where i picked up these bumps. there is no chance they are an std unless i might have picked up herpes or something on the bathtub because i've never had sex. can you catch herpes off a bathtub? what else could it be?
It's rare, but I know of someone who's teenage daughter had herpes..and the next thing you know the Mom got them. The Dr told her it must have been from non-sex contact with the virus..such as the toilet, bathtub or a towel. While this is very rare, and you'd most likely need to have a break in the skin where the virus enters..I would say it can happen. It would be best to go to the Dr and he/she can do a blood test to see if you have been exposed. There are plenty of good medications that can help control this, but the bad thing is...once you have it, you have it for life!
i recently learned i am pregnant. so far, im thinkin its prolly a month and a half along. im 16, and there is NOOOOOOO way in the world i can have this baby. theres no way in the world i can tell anyone my boyfriend of over a year got me pregnant. my family's real good friends with his, and things just wouldnt be pretty. also, both our families are real religious and would drown us in all the 'sex before marriage is a sin' stuff. well, fact of the matter is, since we havent told anyone about it yet- i havent gone to a doctor. i know youre supposed to get prenatal care the second you find out youre pregnant- but i cant bring myself to tell anyone, and truthfully- i really dont want to have this baby. i will NOT have an abortion, but i think i might be having a miscarriage, or about to be having one. i have all of the symptoms. i guess my questions are;
1. how do i tell people?
2. how do i know for sure if im having a miscarriage?
and 3. am i a horrible person?
If you are having symptoms of a miscarriage the only way to know for sure is to go to the Dr. Do you know that there is such a thing as an incomplete miscarriage where parts of the fetus are left inside the uterus? This can cause complications and an infection that you could get very sick from. After you go to the Dr, you will then know what steps to take next. Discuss your concerns with the nurse or the Dr and they will guide you in the right direction. You are not a horrible person..and in your parents minds they have already prepared for the what ifs. So even if they appear angry and shocked, they will most likely come around with some time.
I was at my cousins house yesterday and she cussed me out and I was wondering what I should do about it becouse if I tell my mom she won't let me go to her house anymore and my cousin and I are like sisters so I don't want that to happen what should I do?
Don't talk to your cousin for a few days, then call her and tell her you would like to make peace and put an end to the hard feelings. As long as you make up and get past this, don't tell your Mom. After all sisters fight but they still love each other.
Hi-
this is a serious situation: I have a great boyfriend, but my ex boyfriend is extremely dangerous and I wonder if I should give up my present relationship and move out of town so my present guy is safe and I will be safe.
The ex is absolutely nuts and he has attempted to hurt someone in this community--I spend most of my time hiding out.
Any answers?
Thanks,
musicfan (I'm 40 years old and female).
Oh Wow..There's a lot of things on here that I can relate to, but I actually did what you are thinking of doing. I broke up with my boyfriend at the time, so my ex who was very dangerous would leave him alone. I loved him so much that I thought I was saving him from a lifetime of heartache and pain. Of course he didn't want to leave me, but I convinced him it was the best. My ex left him alone so in essence it worked in that respect, but my ex did not leave me alone and harrassed me for years to come. There were no stalking laws and a protection order was hard to come by back then...plus they warn you if you sick the law on them, the violence gets worse, and it does.
I have wondered for over 20 some years what life would have been like if I would have stayed with the nice guy. I regret what I did. I know now that if we were deeply in love we would have found a way to be together, even if it would have required both of us to move. I'm afraid you might regret your decision too...I would never go that route again.
i hate it when people talk about me behind my back but unfortunatly people do. and i dont know how to deal with it anymore. i used to ignore it but i cant anymore and im ready to snap. what should i do?
The people who get so caught up in gossip don't realize the harm it causes. However, they may not be targeting you as bad as you think they are. Pass around this poem....and wait it out. Otherwise do your best to aviod these "backstabbers" all together.
My name is gossip.
I have no respect for justice.
I maim without killing.
I break hearts and ruin lives.
I am cunning and malicious and gather strength with age.
The more I am quoted the more I am believed.
I flourish at every level of society.
My victims are helpless.
They cannot protect themselves against me because I have no name and no face.
To track me down is impossible for you.
The harder you try, the more elusive I become.
I am nobody's friend.
Once I tarnish a reputation, it is never the same.
I topple governments and wreck marriages.
I ruin careers and cause sleepless nights, heartache and indigestion.
I spawn suspicion and generate grief.
I make innocent people cry in their pillows.
Even my name hisses. I am called Gossip.
Office gossip. Shop gossip. Party gossip. Telephone gossip.
I make headlines and headaches.
Before you repeat a story ask yourself, is it true?
Is it fair? Is it necessary? If not--- KEEP IT TO YOURSELF!
my parents are pretty stict. i know it seems like a long way away, but i need to start working on this now. i turn 16 in september and get my license in october. it would be my dream to get a car 4 christmas. my parents already told me i cant untill next summer.. not this summer. how can i change their minds??? and the car i want is pretty cheap! 10,000. i need advice
If they told you next summer..I think that's great. I am wondering if you push them too much they might make you wait longer? So perhaps you should accept the answer that they gave you and in the mean time show them how responsible you are in other ways. I guess $10,000 is pocket change for some people, but around here people wouldn't spend more than $3,000.00 on a first car. Some would only spend half that.
So if my kid had the nerve to tell me that $10,000 was a cheap car, I'd say fine..you want that car, you pay for it yourself.
hi, well just yesterday i went to the comic store and purchased 2 comics. quite old by the look of them. now im not a comic book reader, but thought they could increase in value. i was just wandering if you could tell me the value of them? i have superman no.374 with august written under it. on the cover it says, "here comes vartox-- being flung around on a crushing collision course with the MAN OF STEEL!" "but who is the mystery woman behind this clash of the mightiest men alive?" . i also have an issue of the eternals, who i have never heard of. On the cover there is 3 muscular men who look the same with long blonde hair. behind them - a woman and in front of them all, on the edge of the cover, a green thing. there is an arrow pointing to this green "thing" saying, "He has the power to mold the world to his will! the deadliest challenge yet for ikarus and the mystic might of:SERSI THE TERRIBLE!" on the spine it reads "1977 marvel comic group" . so if you could tell me the rought value, it would me much appreciated. thanx
My son bought a couple of old comic books at a garage sale and we estimated the value by finding the same ones on sale on ebay. Also I did a search online and found prices on some of the marvel comics.
http://www.math.ucla.edu/~alee/reprints.html
ok this is kind of long, but it is important,atleast to me. alright i really like this guy his name is carl. welll carl is alot older than me im 13 and hes 17.carl likes me to and we were dating not going out i donnt know we would justdo sexual things you know?? well last night i met my friends ex boyfriend they only went out for a day his name it bob. bob saw my myspace pictures and he thoought i was really hot we talked on the phone and we like each other alot he asked me out and i said yes i dont know how to tell carl. .... thats my first question. my second one is is that his ex girl friend hates me she got like five people to call him and tell him im fat i am fat thought but i really like him and i wanna stay with him.how can i loose weight before i meet him at movies.
i am fives foot big boned and i anf 140 ilbs. how can i get a flat tummy as soon as i can. i will do anything but i cant run and i dont hav a bike and i cant join a club or whatever. thanks
please dont give me any speacher on how i should not worry about him or whatever.
ps. thats not there real names. haha
Crunches are the best for flattening the abs, but really you are not fat. If a person likes you for you..then it shouldn't be a concern. If they don't like you for a couple of extra pounds, they aren't worth losing weight for! I know this is important to you, but you really need to be careful with older boys. Someone your own age would be much better. If you like the boy, don't worry about your weight or what your friends say. Just have fun! That's what is important at your age...fun!
im 15
this happened a while ago but i still am not sure...so my bf fingered me then a week later broke up with me...
what im asking is: is fingering a big deal?
thank you
Okay, it's not oral sex, but it is still a form of sex. Typically it's not something that just anyone would do, but it seems to be pretty popular on this board! It could be a big deal if he takes it that way, so the best thing to do is ask him how he feels about it. Or since you are not seeing him anymore..forget it and move on.
my fever is 100.9 , is that bad?
I have been having horrible aches and pains, stuffed up sinuses (ears, nose, throat)
and i feel woozy half of the time.
Basically a 100.9 temperature would still be considered a low grade fever. It's not usually serious. The "woozy" feeling could be a result of the temp or the ear/sinus congestion. A fever is really not a bad thing at all because it warns us that some kind of viral or bacterial infection is going on, and it also helps make us better. In other words it sort of "cooks" the germs. The best advice is to see a Dr, and do whatever he/she tells you, but as far as the temperature..don't be overly concerned.
i do not understand why everyone is always saying "don't have sex" all i hear from teachers now is "sex will ruin your life, it hurts you, its horrible, don't do it, you'll regret it, yada yada yada" um, you wouldn't be here if it weren't for your parents having sex. teachers shouldn't say this. it is actually a great thing if you do it at the right time. i think they should tell us the disadvantages of having sex when you are young, not just in general NOT HAVING SEX. is there a reason why people tell us this?
You know, I think you are getting the wrong message. I doubt that many educated people will say "sex is horrible"..this is just the way it presented. The truth is, that for teenagers the bad things about sex often outweigh the good, and perhaps the adults in your life are using scare tactics as a prevention. Usually though, when you tell a teen not to do something for whatever reason, they are even more tempted.
Yes, with the right person, and at the right time..taking all things into consideration such as birth control, stds, the emotional connection and so on, sex can be a beautiful enjoyable experience. Adults are telling you the dangers, and considering the potential for complications you should be aware of the negatives. Look at it like a balancing act with side effects.
I was at a party and I was drunk and an older guy I met there forced me into doing stuff i didn't want to do, the worst part was he wasn't drinking. Im not sure what to do because i don't know whether to confront him about it. I feel like I was raped and I really don't know what to do to get through this.
Okay so you weren't raped--but you apparently were sexually abused. Is this guy an adult? Are you a minor? Forcing someone against their will is still a crime. I think the only way to get through it is to face it head on. Talk to friends or other people at the party and see what they know and would be willing to tell, then take the information to the police. Imagine if you wouldn't have got the guy to leave you alone, imagine how the next vulnerable female might feel when he does this to them? No, don't confront him, he could become dangerous..just handle it legally through the police.
My mom won't let me get a dog we had 3 dogs before 1 died of parvo.. 1 ran away(it came off of its leash) and 1 we gave away
I would never feed my dog i was like 8 or 9 then but I really would take care of this dog I want it so bad how could I get my mom to let me have a dog don't tell me it'll make me responible cause i already tried it
Wow, your family doesn't have a very good history with dogs. I can understand your Mom's apprehension. Don't ask again for a long time. Show your Mom you are responsible in other ways like helping around the house, getting good grades etc. Once you have accomplished the responsibility part then ask again.
I know this isn't a medical website, but I called the doctor's office and they're booked until tommorow. 15/f
Since Friday I've been pretty sick. Friday I had the chills and a fever (at one point I was delirious) but I had a really important performance for drama so I went. Saturday I was delirious all day, chills, fever, sore throat, runny nose. Sunday my ears started to hurt, throat hurt, painful cough, lots of sneezing. Last night my eyes started to produce mucus (i know, gross). I was literally picking it out of my eyes. This morning when I woke up my eyes were crusted shut and I couldn't open them without washing them off. My eyes sting and the veins are bright red...from a small distance my eyes appear pink, and I still have a fever.
Any idea of what this is? Pinkeye maybe? Or if you know something that will help my eyes, I can't keep them open but when i sleep they get crusted shut. Sorry this is so long!
If you have had a high fever with those symptoms you may have a case of the flu. A conjunctivitis can be caused by a viral infection. Rinse your eyes with some saline eye wash, apply cool compresses for 10 minutes to soften the discharge, and wipe your lids/lashes from the inside corner out. Use a clean part of the washcloth for the other eye. Until the drainage is clear you shouldn't share washclothes or towels with anyone, and wash your hands every time you touch your eyes. In addition don't touch the tip of the eye drop bottle to your eyes or you contaminate the entire bottle. This information is not a substitute for a medical opinion and treatment.
ok this is kinda weird...
i have this thing under my arm pit and it hurts really bad
i asked my mom what it was but she isnt sure
it goes far down into my skin and i thought it was like a bug bite or something but its goes really far down and i dont know what it is
any ideas what it could be?
oh and its not from shaving and its isnt a pimple either
It could be a lymph node, especially if it is tender. Lymph nodes get inflammed when there is an infection somewhere in your body, or in other disorders. The best thing is to get checked by a Dr. so you don't have to guess at what is wrong anymore.
i'm 15/f i recently had sex with two guys. they didn't use protection and i am not on the pill. i think i might be pregnant and i only know one of the guys i slept with. i'm really worried on how to confront my parents. i really need some pointers on how to tell them and how to find the other guy so i can find out which one is the father. i'm certain i'm pregnant!
-Sarha
You are certainly in a difficult situation. If you have been keeping track of your periods and know the first day of your last menstrual cycle you can estimate when ovulation and conception may have happened. See this site for more information: http://www.fertilityfriend.com/p/163/index150.html
Now, if you had sex on the same day with different guys, or even a day or two a part you will not be able to tell who the father is without a paternity test which can be done after the baby is born. If you know one of the guys, it will basically be a process of elimination, if he is..the other guy is not. As far as finding the other guy, you will have to do a bit of investigating. Use the internet, ask around...hire a PI if you are able.
My suggestion is, if you plan to keep the baby go to an organization such as Luthern Social Services or Birthright and ask for resources that can help you. Once you have accomplished this, and at least a first medical check up sit down with your parents and just come right out and tell them. They will be shocked, but hopefully after a little time passes they will want to help you.
Hey all my friends and famil tells me that iam a hypochondriac that means I say iam sick when iam really not and it makes all my friends and family hate me how can I stop being a hypochondriac?
First of all, do you really do that? I mean say you are sick, or make up symptoms when you are not sick? Or do you just over exaggerate every little thing. Think of the story the boy who cried wolf..if you don't know that story, you can probably find it online. The way to stop being a hypochondriac is to find out why you do this in the first place, you might need to visit a therapist to get to the bottom of what's going on. Otherwise, just think before you complain, and don't say anything until you really are sick.
my friend and i and her boyfrind went to the movies the other night and we were having fun,until those to got in a fight and she hit him,he ended up having a bad cut and then me and him went to my apartment to clean it up the n we started to hookup and then we got so in to it clothes were takin off and then she walked in on us!!i am trying to apoligize to her but she wont take my calls or anything!What shall i do?
Boyfriend stealer/backstabber :'(
Either leave the guy, and try to make it up to the friend. Or stay with the guy and forget about the friend. At this point, with what you did, you will not likely ever be able to get your old friend back and have the relationship be the same. Granted she shouldn't have hit him, but you shouldn't have "hooked up" with him either.