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I'm in 9th Grade, and I'm unsure of who I am. There's the very smart side of me, the kind, helpful, selfless side of me, the sarcastic witty side of me, and the social side of me. I never know which to be, and my parents are always telling me how "I act weird around my friends" and "this isn't the girl I know." I just want to be me! Help! (link)
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Only you know who you are, Nobody can tell you eles wise. Ask yourself, Who am I? Who do I want to become? Can I become it? It's okay to be weird around friends, family, etc. You are just being yourself. A unique individual who just likes to have fun. There is nothing wrong with that. Just be yourself and enjoy it.
"You are who you are, Not what you pretend you are"
xxx
BahaiMa22
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Well I dated this guy for a year & 3 months. Things just did'nt work out , I was heart broken . He broke up with in June . I fount out JUST 2 weeks ago he had been having " flings " with my BESTFRiEND from that January till the break up , he cheated on me & everything . I went through hell for 6 months trying to get over him . I started hanging with this guy Jason , we became BESTFRiENDS August . We did'nt have feelings for each other for a while , we were seriously bestfriends . Well as the months went by , we did start liking each other & started " talking " . Well my ex [ Justin ] - was my first love . Me and Jason date now , since November . It's great ; He treats me WAY better than Justin did . but after I fount out Justin cheated I really didn't want ANYTHiNG to do with him ... ain't talked to him since I fount out . but I feel bad & guilty because I think about him , I would'nt say it's alot , but more than I should . I know he's my first love & all and that's normal . but I just really want this to TRULEY be over , I feel bad because I feel as if i'm not giving my [ ALL ] to Jason . I'm in love with Jason though , I fell really fast because we knew each other so well & automaticly " clicked "... what do I do ... anyways to just NOT think about him ? ugh (link)
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My ex and I dated for five years. Again, He was my first. However, I found out just about 2 weeks ago as well that he cheated on me. It's okay to still think about him but try not to let it get the best of you. It takes time to get over hurt and not to mention your first. You are probably not giving everything to Jason because you are still healing from the hurt from your ex. You are cautious and it's perfectly normal. It will get better it will just take some time. Try to take things slow with Jason, Get to know him really well and your trust will come in time. Any guy that cheats on any woman is just simply not worth there time. Think about what you have now, Think about what you had then. You said in your graph that he treats you so much better. You seem happy, He seems happy let it be happy.
xxx
BahaiMa22
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18/female
So this is a VERY long scenerio. I met an amazing kid when I was 17 years old and he was 21 years old. The beginning of this relationship was great, don't get me wrong. He had been thru a lot of things in the past. He moved all over and came back here mainly because he has a younger sibling and his mothers grave is here. That's when I met him. He was amazing, made me feel so great. I loved life and everything in it. Whenever I saw him it was like I wish I could stop time so it could last forever. It didn't take much for things to change. He was unemployed so I was giving him money once every now and then and he wasn't forcing me so I didn't really feel like I had to, I only wanted to. Afterall, I was living at home and had parents who even paid for the gas in my car and he had to take care of everything by himself. I was a lot luckier then he had ever been and he always pointed that out. Soon after, I started to let him use my car when I was at work and he wasn't going anywhere except hanging out with his friends and staying home, which didn't bother me. But then it was like using my car constantly every single day. And I kinda liked the idea of seeing him after work every night. And whenever I gave him money he was a lot happier and nicer towards me which made me happy. When things were going wrong I'd blame myself. But then we broke up. And he still was using my car and I was still giving him money because even though we weren't an official couple we were still fooling around, friends w/ benefits. After awhile that even stopped, and it was just constantly like can I use your car, I need some money, this and that. We broke up because he didn't have much to offer me even though he really liked me. Then I felt like he didn't even like me anymore and he started telling people he didn't have any feelings for me, so then why am I still around? He would tell me he really likes me and we would be official if he had something to offer me. It's like he was giving me mixed signals, and I didn't even know what to do. Besides all of this stuff, valuable things in my house went missing. For example, camera, ipod, etc. I wanted to see if I had maybe left it as his place and when I asked him if a camera was there he handed me one and said, "is this yours." Took me about a minute to realize it was my sisters. I mean after all I've done for this kid. Give him my car, money, love, time, and everything he has done me wrong in so many ways. But I still care for him and love him from the bottom of my heart. I know he's been through a lot but I don't deserve to be treated this way. I just don't know how to tell him to either change his act or to leave me alone, because I'm afraid he won't ever talk to me. Or things even worst than that. This kid was my first everything besides first kiss, and thankfully I didn't loose my virginity to him, but other than that my first everything. (link)
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Okay this sounds EXACTLY like what I went through with my first boyfriend....
From what you've typed above it sounds like he is simply taking advantage of you.
1. You are giving him money and he loves it because now he doesn't have to work to make his own money because he knows where to get it. A big NO NO! You are NOT his sugar mama.
2. You are letting him use YOUR car. NO NO again now if he gets in a car accident YOU are responsible the car is in your name. Another excuse for him not to get his own car.
There is no telling this guy to change his ways, I honestly think you deserve SO much better. This guy sounds lazy, inconciderate and basically a plain jerk with a capital J. It's time to say goodbye and move on. There are many fish out there in the sea who I'm sure would love to be with you. Don't let a guy treat you like this, You don't deserve it.
BahaiMa22
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Has anyone else noticed that questions are the same? I mean I love this site, but latly i've been getting bored because every question is the same!! It bothers me. Like 13 year olds talking about boyfriends, friends, and sex. It's like how difficult is your life at 13?! Anyone else feel the same? ANd how can i make this site more interesting for me? (link)
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Hmm,
I'm a little two sided on this one, It's crossed my mind why do so many young people ask the same questions over and over again. I can see your point certainly. However, I just kind of tell myself that the older folks on Advicenators have more answers and they have more knowledge to certain things than the younger ones. I'm sure when you were 13 you asked some of the questions also. Yes, I agree 13 is a little young to be having sex, boyfriends, etc but thats life and it's not going to change. If you are tired from this site maybe you should take a break?
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24/Female/UK
I have an eating disorder and this year i've been trying new foods everyday, but only in moderation and i'm really anxious around food.
I'm trying to eat as healthy as possible since my body is really wrecked (let that be a warning to anyone striving to be skinny!), anyway i know your meant to eat at least 5 fruits a day and since drinking is easier for me to do i was wondering which fruit drinks will count towards one of my five.
Ribena have some fruit juices but i hate ribena as i find it makes me more thirsty.
We have Supermarkets own brand Orange Juice which i like but i don't think thats as healthy.
If you have any recomendations that would be really appreciated, thank you. (link)
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Apple Juice
Cranberry Juice
Tomato Juice is also good
Anything that might have a varity of juices is good
You could also try smoothies if you like those too.
BahaiMa22
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since im 17 now my years relying on my parents to keep a roof over my head is getting smaller, even though i know they will always let me live with them i still have that urge to fly from the nest. I did some research and made a rather silly summary of how much it might cost me to move out, im not sure if ill wait till i finish college or high school, but my idea of the cost came to about $15.5k for the first year on my own, you know renting an apt or house and all the little things like groceries and furniture, but I want to see of anyone could tell me how much the avrg. amount of money is that i would be spending to live on my own just so im prepared? (link)
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I just moved into an apartment last month. I will tell you it's not cheap.
Moving out takes more thought than you probably thought of already.
A cheap apartment these days run from no cheaper than $750.00 each apartment is different so it's hard to give you an estimate of how much money would be spend if you moved. Some apartments come with unities. My apartment comes with the water and the heat. However I still need to pay all the other stuff eletricity, food, cable, internet etc. I would highly suggest if you don't already to save money make sure you have at least 2k in the bank minimum. As it's always saver to have it than to not have enough. Food a week depends on how much you eat ($75.00) say your rent is 800.00 /monthly you are already up at 875. I would suggest looking for a room mate if not maybe you could go half and half with a friend. That's about all I can suggest for now and if you have a Price right near you I would suggest shopping there for food as I went last night and got a whole cart full for 80.00.
Good luck!
BahaiMa22
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well, i was getting music off of myspace from file2HD.com, and it would start downloading it, and then it would stop after like, a few seconds and i would only get part of the song.
should i use a different site to download free music? if so, which one?
and how do i get it to download the entire song instead of only part of it? (link)
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Limewire
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My boyfriend thinks I'm dirty and weird, cos I like porn films and magazines. He thinks it's just for men. Am I dirty and weird, or is he being a prude? (link)
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No, There is nothing wrong with you. You'd be suprised of the amount of woman who also watch/like porn. It's sexual, It turns people on and it's exciting. Porn is not just for men however I will say men probably watch it alot more than woman do. I think he may just be over reacting. There is nothing wrong with liking porn at all.
BahaiMa22
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i do like people who cheat. most of my friends always cheat and later they show off their marks.
it really angers me what should i do (link)
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Many people who cheat once will do it again, As long as they know they can get away with it. There is really nothing you can do to stop it from angering you. Cheating would normally get anyone angry. I would start looking for someone who is more faithful and will be honest and not cheat. I think you'd be alot happier. :)
BahaiMa22
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17/f
I'm a virgin. Is it REALLY that important to lose it to someone you love? I don't plan on falling in love anytime soon. My first kiss wasn't special. It annoyed me at first. My second kiss wasn't special either, but I found the guy attractive and realized that was perfectly fine with me. I'm not about to go have some unsafe rendezvous with a stranger or anything, I'd just like to know. (link)
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I wouldn't say its extremely important, However I will say it's always best to wait for that special person only because when he comes and you share that moment it is more special. I didn't wait, To this day I feel sorry I didn't. I found that special person in my life and I've already giving myself away to someone who just wasn't even worth my time. It all depends on how you feel about the situation just don't do something you will regret. I still regret now waiting and it's been 6 years for me....
BahaiMa22
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18/F Anyways here's my problem. I've been dating my boyfriend for three months and things are really great. It's just that lately I've had these feelings I've never had for anyone before, and mind you I've dated a few guys. I almost have this fear that he's going to go back to college and find someone else way prettier and smarter. I'm still in high school, and he's 22. I sort of have a problem of letting people get close to me, but for some reason I let myself become vulnerable around him. I've just started putting my guard down for people. I'm constantly thinking about him, and when I think about him my heart starts pounding faster and faster. I just would like to find out if he's feeling the same way without just coming out and asking him flat out. Anyways, please help me think of how to get over feelings of heartbreak because I'm also afraid if I keep feeling that way he'll end up dumping me. I have a very low self esteem on top of it all. Any help is appreciated. (link)
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Okay, I'm going to be fully honest with you.
You may be having the "distant" feeling only because you've been hurt so many times before you are cautious and there is nothing wrong with that. However, There is really no way of knowing what is going to happen when he gets to college. If he truely loves and cares about you I'm sure he would never even attempt to find another girl. The only way to truely know is to sit down with him and have an open conversation about your concerns. Don't worry to much, Just stay calm. Talk to him, Let him know how you are feeling. Communication is always the key.
xx
-Bahaima22
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Weirdest question that will probably ever be asked on here.... but does Tom from Myspace have a Facebook? haha. And wouldn't that be like... I don't know. Lol. Thanks. (link)
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Well...
The person below me exsplained it in a different way, However they do have a point about one thing. Facebook and Myspace are pretty much at war. I wouldn't be suprised if they weren't at least. Tom made myspace and I would highly doubt he would want a Facebook if he already has his own website. However a flat out answer for you would be I doubt it.
Bahaima22
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So it was recently Christmas, and I had no idea what to get my boyfriend. I knew anything I got him would not be special enough, and I looked and looked and time just kind of slipped by and I didn't end up getting him anything. He got me something really nice. He was really hurt that I didn't get him anything. I regret it now, but I can't change that, so please don't bug me about it.
Question: What can I surprise him with that would make him really happy? (If any of you suggest sex I will rate you badly) (link)
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Hmm..
What about a movie and a dinner? :)
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I need something good that I can put on my hair (that won't make it heavy/crunchy) before I use a hair dryer and/or flatiron!
Links please, and nothing too expensive (like 10 dollar maximum) (link)
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Okay one tip I can give you is DO NOT wash/dry your hair before you flat iron it. After all it will leave you with frizz/or static eletricity. To keep the hair a healthy look after a hair dryer or flat iron I would suggest spray on conditioner it works well and helps the frizz!
xxx
-Bahaima22
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how do you know when you're in love? (link)
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Love is a strong word, It can be discribed in many ways. Love means different things to different people. However I would say "Love" is when you care so much about another being that you'd take a bullet for them without hesitation.
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First Question: I am moving in with my fiance soon (we are sending our check in on the 23rd of this month) I am excited but a little nervous, any tips?
Second Question: I live at home with my father and my son right now. He is driving me crazy. I keep everything inside. When i try and talk he acts like he is 12. He acts like a child. I am always cleaning up after him, them he screams i dont do anything. My fiance and I have one car, I drive him too work at 9:45 am. i pick him up at 2. I go to work usally 4 (sometimes 2 when he needs to find a ride home) i take him back to work on my lunch break at 8. and pick him back up at 1 am. i am always cleaning and taking care of my child and all he does is complain and yell ( we just moved here to missouri in june). I am not sure what i am asking i guess how to deal with him?? (link)
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I just moved into my first apartment last month, The first couple of months are going to be rough. "Giving you a heads up" but relax, Think about the good things. You have accomplished something and you should feel great about it. Your fiance just might be under a great deal of stress yet overwhelmed with everything. Moving can be very overwhelming yet alone hectic and as well as his job goes that could be apart of it. Try to be understanding, Talk to him. I do not know the relationship between you and your finace but I'm going to say this as a friend to you. "Think twice, Act once".
If you need to talk, Feel free to message me.
I wish you the best of luck and I hope I helped.
Bahaima22
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I want to work in this clothing store.. but a few of the questions, I'm not sure how to answer.
Position: (Floor-sales person? ..what is the proper name? What are all of the positions in a clothes store? It's like a boutique.)
Date You Can Start: (How do I say whenever?)
Salary Desired: (What is reasonable?)
What do they mean by:
Subjects of Special Study/Research Work, Special Training, and Special Skills?
What are some "Subjects of Special Study/Research Work, Special Training, and Special Skills" that a would be useful in a store?
Help! Please! Thanks.
I'm 16 and female.
(link)
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Position: (Floor-sales person? ..what is the proper name? What are all of the positions in a clothes store? It's like a boutique.)
Date You Can Start: (How do I say whenever?)
Salary Desired: (What is reasonable?)
Okay, For position you can put "Anything Available" that way they are aware that you are open to anything. If you want to be in sales, You can put simply put Cashier or Sales.
Date you can start, I always put A.S.A.P "As soon as possible"
Salary Desired, I always put "Minimum wage" That way they know you aren't too picky, and when they interview you if they ask what salary you desire you can possibly work something out with the management.
Hope that helps!
Bahaima22
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How do you make your pores smaller on your face? Are there any products that would help? (link)
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Try Proactive I heard it really helps!
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is there any good way to tell someone you like them without straight up saying i like you? i think it would just be random, and i'm 18 and have never told ANYONE ive liked them before but i've decided i need to tell this boy. i've liked him for three years now !! its a confusing situation but i just dont want to be random about it so id like to know how people have told others they've liked them, and how it worked out :) thanks! (link)
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Honestly, I've never said "I like you" to a Guy before not being the first to say it anyway.
Sometimes people who like each other start off with a casual conversation and then just move towards the subject by saying something like "There is something I've been wanting to tell you for awhile now I just wanted you to know that I have strong feelings for you" or sometimes people just come flat out and say it in a note or something but thats when it sometimes becomes an awkward situation. If you know the person socially then I would suggest saying what I put first, and then if you feel comfortable enough ask him/her how they feel about you. ;)
Good Luck!
BahaiMa22
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Warning: This will get long. 14, Female.
When I look in the mirror, I hate what I see. I think I am one of the most disgusting looking people on this planet. The boys in my school don't make this any better either. One day during a class I was fixing my eye make up and my teacher was like "Don't do that in here, save that for you're time. You're pretty without the make up anyway." and on of the boys made a comment that really, really hurtful remark and still does to this day it hurts, which was "HA NO SHE'S NOT" That was one of the meanest comments I have ever recieved, and it makes me cry.
My best friend is commonly agreed as the prettiest girl in my grade, not just by us freshmen but by everyone else too! When I stand next to her, I feel so gross. I hate it, honestly I do. I used to cut and I'm trying so dearly hard to refrain from it, but each day the temptation gets harder and harder to resist. I know I'm skinny also, but I feel like an ogre to put it in simpliest terms. I feel like I'm overgrown and horribly fat. It's disgusting.
I'm on pills right now for controling Bi-Polar, and that makes me feel even worse about myself. Like I'm incredibly "fucked up" and I have to take some stupid pill to be a normal human being. It makes me cry at night. I can't help it though.
Anerexia and cutting never looked so good. I'm heading in the wrong direction and typing this had made me cry, showing how much it affects me. I sometimes wish I would die, and get it over with, so all the sadness will disappear. When I'm going to take my pills, sometimes I consider taking them all so it would all be over.
Please someone help, I'm loosing all hope in life, and I don't know what to do. (link)
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You are not the ugliest person on this planet, You are not the only one that takes medication.
I used to feel the same way infact at times I still do. You need to know that you are NOT ugly, fat, and that you are not an orge. The first step to healing is to know what you are and to except it. Tell yourself you are NOT ugly, keep telling yourself that. Focus on the best features about yourself and each day pick another thing about you that you like. If someone says or doesn't think you are attractive that's there loss not yours and don't let them get you down. You need to know that you are a unique individual who has alot going for you. Don't change who you are because others don't like it. If you do, You only point out your insecurities to others even more. I take medication also, I have severe depression and bipolar it's not fun but I have to take the medication in order to help myself feel better. If you feel the need don't hesitate to talk to someone a friend, parent, school teacher etc.
BahaiMa22
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