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Hi, I'm Courtney. I want to become a pre-school teacher :] and I've been though a whole heck of a lot, so feel free to ask me anything, i'll do my best to help ! xxo."i refuse to sink."
advice
PLEASE ANSWER ASAP.....!!!!!!!!!
okay so my best friend just told me that one of our guy friends has a crush on her and thinks she is hot ... but he moved away to somewhere like 17 hours away. BUT THE PROBLEM IS.... that he said "i think you are hot" (to my friend) and then he said "but your other friend ___(me)___ is not, i never thought she was hot" SO NOW... i am totally depressed cause i think that i am ugly and i feel ugly. i know that one persons opinion means nothing really especially since i dont even like this guy. UGH .... so now i have really low self esteem and i am kinda mad for my friend to tell me this .....it is kinda like bragging. so now i am kinda mad at her for saying like that he thought she was hot and i am ugly. so what do i do cause i dont wanna be mad at her and i am losing confidence in myself :( ANSWER ASAP!!!!!
thnxs :) :(
i'm so sorry :[ my friend just went through the same exact thing that you're going through right now. me and my 3 close friends went down the shore for a week together. We met these 2 guys, I have a boyfriend so I stayed out of my 3 friends way since they're all single and ready to mingle ;] hahaa. well, i was on the phone with my boyfriend, when one of my friends came up to me crying. I immediatley asked her what was wrong and she was telling me how one of my friends asked one of the guys what they thought of them. and basically, they said that im really cute and that if i didnt have a boyfriend, they would like me, and they said that my other friend was cute too and that my friend who asked what they thought said that she was realy cute and cool and all of this, but they didn't say anything about my friend who was crying, they just said, "she's quiet and not very pretty" ... i felt soooo bad for her. and like, my friend TOLD HER THIS TO HER FACE, i was so mad. like clearly, you don't do that to a person, so I know what you mean when you say you feel like your friend was bragging and that you're mad at her for doing that.
I had a long talk with my friend, [the one they said wasnt pretty] that night. I sat her down and told her this: it is one guy. ONE GUY who doesn't like you. It's okay. There are other guys out there who all have different oppinions and different taste in girls. No one can define beauty. Everyone is beautiful and pretty and special in their own way. So what ? one guys definition of pretty is different than th next guys. and yeah, she had no right to say that to you, but she probably told you because she wanted to share the information with one of her best friends because she was so happy about it. so be happy for her, but don't feel bad because you are who you are, and one day you are going to fnd the guy of your dreams who is going to treat you and think that you are the most wonderful/beautiful girl in the world.
I know this probably didnt help much, hahaa, but i tried :] I mean, you can't think that just one guy is like every single other guy ... because that's not true. you have to believe that you are pretty and everyone else will believe it too. walk with your head held high and have confidence. although, maybe you should talk to your friend baout how what she told you hurt your feelings. that's what my friend ended up doing and it got all cleared up afterwards. communication and confidence is key. you just have to WANT to make this better.
Just talk to her, and i promise that it will get better. hope i helped ! and if you need antyhing else, at all, feel free to inbox me :] good luck, and you are a beautiful girl, just because one boy doesnt realize that, doesnt mean you're not. remember that. xxo.
okay so i have my homecoming dance soon, and i really need to find a dress. i'm punk: i wear skinny jeans, band tees, flannel, i have blue hair etc. so i'm trying to find a dress that actually goes along with my style. i don't want anything too out there, like a corset dress, unless you think it's reallllllly adorable. and i'm looking for a shorter dress, knee length and above. i also plan on wearing converse with my dress too. color doesn't really matter to me, and designs like plaids and stripes are fine too. oh and the price just needs to be under about $80.
thankyou in advance!!!
I found a site you'll like alot.
http://www.starletsandharlets.com/50_s_dress_1950_s_dresses_50s_1950s_clothing_s/6.htm
- sooooo mnay pages of dresses you just have to look through it, lots of choices and really reasonable prices, theres basically nothing over 80 or 90 dollars.
good luck ! hope i helped, have fun ;] xxo.
what is the best non painful way to commit suicide?
the best, most non painful way to commit suicide would be...
to not commit suicide.
Please don't go looking for ways to end your life, you have so MUCH to live for, and you have your whole life ahead of you and people who love and care about you. not only will you be hurting yourself, but you'll also be hurting the ones around you, and you'd affect their lives as much as you're affecting yours.
no matter what you do, this will be painful. I'm here if you want to talk, but don't do this, you can get through this hard time without ending your life, i promise !
good luck, and if you ever need anything, feel free to inbox me. xxo.
THIS WILL BE LONG.
I guess I'll start at the beginning.
We met in year 7.
Her computer wasn't working so she was seated
next to me. Neither of us wanted to sit together,
I though she was a total nerd(she had glasses)
and she thought I was a total FREAK.
But we got talking and we became best friends.
Lets call her Kelly.
She was in all my classes, we slept over each
others houses a fair bit(well mostly I slept over
hers - I have A LOT of family issues which I'd
rather not get into)
We hung out all the time.
Then year 8 rolled around, we were still friends,
cause we were in all the same classes together.
I started getting into drugs REALLY badly, I was
off my face just about everyday of school. I got
really into sex. I was such a slut, I slept with
soo many people...
I could tell she was trying to distance herself
from me, but how could she? We were "BFFL" We
spent so much time together...
I spun OUT OF CONTROL in the holidays between yr
8 & 9...
I was high everyday. I had so much sex, I drank,
and I shot up, and I snorted... Nothing and no
one could stop me.
I didn't realize how much I was hurting Kelly...
Until year 9(this year) came around.
We're in one class together.... and we never
hungout together at recess and Lunch anyway,
because I don't like her friends and she doesn't
like my friends.
We just kinda of stopped talking.
I miss her so much.
She's tried to help me, but I just shut her out &
everyone says she's being a control freak & I
think I may have said that too.
I want to be friends with her.
I love her, she's my BEST FRIEND int the whole
world, well... she was.
I'm quitting drugs for her.
one by one... but I'm going to do it.
When I told her I was quitting drugs for her, she
was just like "Oh yeah? that's nice" And walked
away. Like she didn't even care.
What can I say to tell her that I'm getting my
life back on track to be friends with her again
when she wont even talk to me??
Please I'm so desperate for help.
I'm really, really sorry this was so long.
xx
actions speak louder than words.
get help, break the addiction FULLY and then approach her when you have fully changed. You might also want to start hanging out with different people, because they will not be a good influence to you in the end and kelly might think that you're lying to her or still occasionally doing the whole drug and sex thing. You need to get better before you can make the friendship between yourself and kelly better. does that make sense ? Like once you progress enough for kelly to see a change, then your friendship will progress.
It's all about how you do this and what you do. Did your look change ? Maybe try to get a new conservative look, something that screams different. You don't have to change what you look like necessarily, or who you hang out with, but these are the types of changes that kelly needs to see in order to believe that you're actually serious about sobering up. Keep trying to talk to her, tell her that you are going to prove to her that you're changing and stopping your old ways because if its the only way to save the friendship, than you're willing to do that because you miss her friendship.
Caring words will really tug at her heart strings. but she really needs to see an imrovement to believe it. and i believe you can do it. I am so proud of you for wanting to change and stop this drig and sex and alcohol thing. It is super good ! and you have alot of will-power to do that. I think that what you're doing is spectacular, and i know you'll succeed :] and once you REALLY start to get away from all of the "bad stuff" you and kelly will be friend in no time. but for now, show her what you can do. go to a therapist, get HELP. I know you want to do this on your own, but maybe .. maybe if you ask her to help you FIND help, it will bring you guys closer. yuh know ? but you need to do this for you :] and i am so proud of you. good for you !
if you need anything else, feel free to inbox me. good luck, hope i helped, and yayy for youu !! xxo.
I'm having a difficult time letting go of my ex. Its been a year since we broke up, but I still love him even though we were mostly just a summer fling and weren't a serious relationship. Now he likes one of my best friends and they're trying to have a relationship. I'm trying to be supportive but it's really taking a toll on me. Its one of the hardest things I've ever had to do.
Well...I've pretty much given up on him coming around and liking me again. I just don't see it happening. But I still love him and can't get over him and I don't know why.
Surprisingly, my question isn't about how to get him back or how to get over him. I mean if you have some advice for that, then I'm definitley open minded to it. But what I'm really looking for is some quotes I might be able to relate to. I love reading quotes that make me feel like I'm not the only one feeling this way. Thanks for your help!
I am a BIG quote person, so I'm sure I'll have something to your liking :] hahaa.
- theres always that one boy that you know you cant have just because your best friend is involved .. but he is your best friend .. and you just really cant afford to lose ... Him.
- he's just another guy she'll have to try to get over because she knows she's wasting her time.
- Don't fall for the guy with the gorgeous eyes until you've learned what's behind them.
- I set myself up for the greatest fall of all time.
- I’ll see you around 2am in my dreams. We’ll be holding hands and laughing like we used to. We wont know the meaning of betrayal and you’ll only look at me. I’ll be your everything, and you’ll be mine. I can’t wait to fall asleep.
- What hurts more? Thinking you should hate him or knowing that you don’t?
- He will never be fully HERS because he will always carry a piece of me around in his heart.
- Sometimes you have to forget what you feel and remember what you deserve.
- During a girls lifetime, she’s gonna find 3 boys. The boy that she loves, the boy that she hates and the boy she can’t get enough of. And it’s gonna turn out to be the same old stupid boy.
- TRUTH ABOUT GiRLS; FACT # 18
It doesn't matter who dumped who or why. Whenever we see an ex with another girl, it always bothers us. Not because we`re not over you, but because we know that we used to be that girl.
- she reads the entire dictionary &&; not one word can describe how she feels.
- You hug him goodbye by like it's nothing while all you wanna do is hold on forever. But you let go, smile, & walk away. Then, you cry all the way home because it will never be the same. Try as you might, you can't make someone love you.
- sometimes its hard to tell if its getting better or your just getting used to the pain.
- && sometimes people mean so much to you that not even the truth can change your mind.
- He looked at me and said, "Do you ever feel like you're working for something you're never going to get. You shoot and miss kind of deal like, no matter what you can't have it, but that makes you fight for it just a little bit more?" I looked at him, stared at him for a second and replied, "Everyday..."
- So he called me, he didn't sound right, and I asked him what was wrong. He told me I should know and I told him she's just one girl don't let her ruin you, you know she's not worth all this trouble. He said but to me she's not just a girl, she's the girl, she's the girl that means 'everything' to me. My heart stopped, not because I was shocked, but because that's exactly how I feel about him.
hope you liked the quotes ! if you need any more, I have soooo many, just inbox me :] good luck ! and it'll get better, I promise, xxo.
Ok 15/f, my current bf is 14/m. He asked me out today. I've only known him since august 19 (the first day of school) because I am a sophmore this year and he is brand new to the highschool, being a freshman. So yeah, I hardly know him at all, and I totally don't get why I said yes... I mean I was just really happy because he's really cute and sweet, but seriously I hardly know anything about him. Today, my friend was saying that she knew him and that he had a myspace so I thought I'd go check it out :/ bad idea. All of his previous statuses from before school started were things like "I think I still love her", "I really miss her" and things like that, which were obviously not applying to me since we didn't know each other at the time of those posts. Now I think he's just using me or something :/ however, I don't really know for sure and I feel like I don't really know him well enough to get mad at him or something... plus I don't really want to tell him that I was actually looking up his myspace page... I don't know what to do...what should I say to him? Should I just end it? How can I tell if he actually likes me? :( thanks for any answers I get...
I know this might not be what you want to hear, but you could be the rebound girl.
It's just a guess, but when you think about it, alot of guys and some girls do this. They break up with someone or get broken up with and want to either get revenge or make their ex jealous so they immediatley try to get with someone they know they have a chnace with or someone who likes them, and they know that for a fact.
I mean, we all can only make assumptions. you just have to talk to him about this, I agree with the advice given below me, bring up the myspace thing and ask him what this is all about. If you feel like something fishy is going on or that something is off, follow your heart and go with your gut instinct.
If you don't know him well enough to think you arent "allowed" to get mad at him, that's not true. you should be upset about this. any normal person in a relationship WOULD be upset. you have every right to be angry and upset. I know you don't want to tell him that you looked him up on myspace, but since you guys are in a relationship now, that's perfectly normal, and he won't think anything of it. you could just be like, "hey, so, I was on myspace and I wanted to look you up, so i did and i noticed some of your statuses were about missing some girl... whats up with that? do you wanna talk about it? because that wasn't that long ago.." something like that. yuh know ? he won't be like, ew, freak. ahaha. not at all. trust me.
I think you should talk to him first before anything else.. like don't just end it so abruptly, let him explain his side of the story. But also, maybe you guys should talk about getting to know eachother better, if the conversation goes well.
oh i got it ! If you want a clever way to bring up the conversation about the myspace page thing, ask him to play 20 questions with you. go back and forth with the questions and close to the end, ask him about myspace, be like, "so on your myspace page your statuses are about this girl, whats up with that?" It's an easier way to say it i guess .. if you wanted another option :] haha. and then after all of the talking about it and everything and you still don't feel right, end it. maybe in the future you guys can be something more than friends [if it doesnt work out] when you get to know eachother better instead of just jumping into a relationship and having all of these doubts.
Don't worry though, you'll sort this out :] good luck ! hope i helped, and if you need anything else, feel free to inbox me ! xxo. :]
do you find people to really be any different under the influence of alcohol from personal experience? (maybe it depends on amt consumed)
I don't drink. Ever. But some of my friends do. And yes, they do tend to become different. But it also depends on the person, their personalities, and how much they are drinking.
Some of my friends who are shy or not as outgoing, start drinking and turn into these loud, kind of obnoxious people. It's like when they drink, they let go and become a different person. some of them get angry or sad, their emotions come out full blast it seems when they drink.
well, hope i helped ! xxo.
f/16
So last night, this guy that I've liked for a few weeks rejected me. When we first started talking, it was great because the two of us would have actual conversations with detailed answers and questions. But overtime he begin to lose interest in talking and his answers got shorter to the point of one word messages.
Originally, we were going to make plans to hang out and go the movies. But last night I was trying to talk to him online, and I mentioned that I'd still like to make plans to hang out. He said that his mom wouldn't let him leave the house until his summer work was done (my mom made the same rule)so I said maybe once school started and said yeah maybe. Then, sensing some tension I said that he could just say no if he didn't want to. So he responded with...
"No, I dont not want to." Confused by this answer, I asked what did he mean. After a few minutes, he finally answered...
"I think you want to hang out with me more than I want to hang out with you." Shocked, I said...
"I don't get it. Don't you wanna be friends?" And he replied....
"No I do, but I think you wanna be more than friends." I was kind of upset, so I didnt say anything for a couple minutes until finally I replied...
"Well I don't really know what to say. I guess I'm sorry." And then he said...
"Its ok. I've just been thinking about it and I thought I should tell you sooner than later." Then I said...
"Thanks for that. I hope we can still be friends." And he said...
"Yeah." Out of curiosity I asked...
"Is there someone else you like? Is that why you're not interested?" And he said...
"Yeah there is this girl I've liked for a while."
Then I asked him about it and he went on to tell me that they had previously been together a few months before, but she ended it by telling him that she didn't think she liked him anymore. But he told me that he thinks they will eventually probably get back together and that now they are one of each others best friends.
So...I'm just confused. If the girl told him that she didn't think she liked him anymore, why does he think they will get back together? I just really wanna tell him that he shouldn't wait for something that might not happen, you know? Take advantage of the opportunities in front of you now (aka me). At least hang out with me and give me a chance. We met in a film acting class and only got to know each other a little bit through that. Whats your view on this situation?
Well, put it this way ...
You know how he basically said he doesn't like you in the way you like him ? but you're thinking there might still be a chance, it's the same way he's feeling about the girl he likes. Even though there might be a slim chance she might like him the way he likes her, there's still hope, and he wants to give it another shot.
Let's face it, when your heart is set on someone, even if their heart isnt set on you ... you're gong to try to change that. Because it's what you WANT. I know it sucks, but you can't force him to like you or give you a try. I think right now, he just needs you as a friend more than anything.
With my boyfriend, before we got together, we were friends and than we became best friends. I wanted him even though he had a girlfriend when we were friends/best friends. I was there for him and in the end, he broke up with her to be with me. Yeah, he had his heart set on her but that can always change. you can change it by just being his friend for now.
Sometimes just being his friend will help you out in the long run. Because love is friendship sent on fire :] haha at least that's how I look at it. and even he said it himself, that they will probably eventually get back together because they used to be friends but now they are BEST FRIENDS. get it ? he's more of the guy to fall for the girl who's his really good friend, rather than one who's not, yuh know ?
You could be that girl, you just have to be there for him and stick it out, even though it's hard knowing he likes someone else. I'm telling you, if you guys become close, as in best friends, he'll consider having a relationship with you at some point, I promise.
At least he had the decency to not lead you on.. but you should definetly hang out with him as friends still. just hang out with him and talk to him as much as possible, don't act like his affection for another girl is affecting you or that will just push him away and you need to get closer to him. these things take time, so give it some and i guarentee it'll work out great :] !
don't give up ! if you need anything else, feel free to inbox me, good luck ! hope i helped, xxo.
Well, I have paranoia issues... I don't mean to sound like a bitch when I say this or anything, but it bothers me. You know how some people add others on Myspace or Facebook? Well some of them add friends like it's some sort of competition, popularity contest, trophy case, or like it's a collection. You know what I mean? I can't stand it, and it seems like that's what my friend is doing. I want to have a SEPARATE life, with some things in my life that DON'T include her, or even relate to her. Could you imagine it being like having someone by your side 24/7? I want to have different interests than her, different friends, different activities I'm involved in, etc. Is that so weird or mean? I feel like her life is my whole life, duplicated. Its like she's stalking me. o__O It gets on my nerves though. I'm friends with people first, then she becomes friends with them. (I know you can have a variety of friends.) It just bothers me because sometimes she ends up 'stealing' my friends. I hate it. I want to have at least SOME different friends than her. Then she goes and adds them on Facebook or Myspace or whatever. The thing is, she doesn't even know them, barely knows them, doesn't talk to them, or just ONLY knows their NAME and that's all. This isn't with my friends only, it's with others. We're in high school, so would expect to meet new people but that's not the case right now. Can't I enjoy things without feeling stalked constantly? I've lost my feeling of being 'different' now. I'm sick of her adding my friends, or adding a crapload of people. I'm not sure if this IS the case, but it feels like she thinks having more friends, or more friends than me will make her better than me, or more popular. Is it not a coincedence that she has maybe, hmmm, 3/4 of mutual friends with me?! Examples on Facebok: Friend's status, she comments. Another friend's status, *she likes*, other friend's status, *she comments*, friend's photo *she comments*, etc etc etc!! I'm sick of seeing her basically EVERYWHERE. Again, I don't mean to sound rude, but I can't stand seeing her everywhere, feeling stalked, feeling like te 3rd wheel compared to her and my other friends that she's 'friends' with. On what she comments or likes, she barely knows them, talks to them, and stuff. That just bugs me. I at least know them more or something. Everyday, it's just MORE friends. MORE MUTUAL friends we share. How ca I not let this get to me? I'm sick and tired of her 'stealing' my friends, or feeling like she 'wins' them over, and they like her better. I'm tired of letting this get to me. and I'm also tired of feeling like I don't have a freakin separate life. What are some things that can make me think POSITIVE? Sorry if this seems ridiculous, but I need advice on how to cope with this.
THAT SAME THING HAPPENED TO ME ! oh wow ! except, mine was a tad bit worse, she told me she wanted to "be me" hert exact words were... "how can I be you?" It was the freakiest thing ever.
Anyways, my biggest pet peeve is when people copy me. I can't stand it. So I know how you feel. She has a right to do whatever she wants but taking it overboard isn't an option. Yeah, on facebook and myspace it has turned into this whole competition thing with who has the most friends, and it's easier to become friends with people you hardly know or don't know at all through the internet and through these websites because you can see what people's lives are like by their statuses and likes and pictures, its easier to relate. So, in my opinion she just wants to be accepted and liked by alot of people. Yeah, maybe she admires you and wants to be like you and have your friends becaue she envies you.
Take it as a flattering gesture. If she's copying yuou constantly, yeah it's going to get on your nerves, but don't let it. be the bigger person. Think of it like you have a fan now haha. Like how famous people have those crazy stalker fans, its because she's jealous of you. She wants what you have. That means that you're a great person, which you seem to be, none of that sounded rude to me at all.
Also, your friends aren't going to be won over by her. They don't even know her. one comment or like on their status and pictures and stuff isn't going to make them dilike you, or like her more, it just won't happen. just keep talking to your friends and be who you are, and nothing will change. they'll just think she's creepy, to be honest.
The stalking part .. yeeeeah. I think you need to take some action here. if it's bothering you THIS MUCH and you cant let it go, hide things from her. there IS a setting on fcbk where you can make it as some people can only see certain things. You should try doing that. Or you could just remove her from your friends list for a while. Or you could talk to her about this ... communication is key. She's not going to stop, so either you deal with it and think of the positive things that someone is envious of you and likes you so much that they want to have what you have, or you can put an end to it, and talk to her nicely about it, just to see what it's all about.
good luck girl ! it sucks, I know. but just think, you have your own fan now :] hahaa. if you need anything else, feel free to inbox me. xxo.
Right there is this guy that i have been out with before, but he finished me cos i dint talk to him that much.
But recently i found out he really liked me and the things is i really like him.
but how do i tell him?
if i text he tells his mates :/ and wen i ring i get scared ...
What on earth shall i do !?
im 14 years of age and i am female.
I've been in your position before, it's very emotionally draining hahaa. not gonna lie. But here's how you deal with it ...
you like him. he may or may not like you. I'm guessing he STILL likes you, so that's good. I think you should text him, just saying hey. and have a normal conversation, don't mention anything about liking him or if he still likes you, because yes, he could potentially show his friends.
3 easy steps:
1. text him for a while, maybe a couple days or a week, until you get comfortable talking to him.
2. call him on the phone or text him telling him to call you sometime. and yes, you may be nervous but you can write down things or topics to talk about on a piece of paper infront of you [he'll never know] just in case you don't know what to talk about and it avoids awkward silences. if you feel comfrotable after a while of talking to him you can ask him about you and him but i suggest you do that i step number 3..
3. hang out with him in person. ask him to hang with you one day, or he might ask you :] then towards the end of hanging out, bring up the past. be like, "i really miss how we used to be, and i just wanna know if we could ever be a couple again because i really like you still."
just flirt alot with him in those 3 steps and if he flirts back, GOOD SIGN :] you just have to get over your fears and take the risk or you'll always be thinking, what if i did that? would things have chnaged between us? worse case scenario: you guys just remain friends, and thats okay. there's plenty of fish in the sea, but i have a feeling it'll work out for you two :]
good luck ! have fun, and if you need anything else, feel free to inbox me. hope i helped, [dont sweat it so much. youll be fine, i promise] xxo.
14/f
(..I hope you realize when you told me to ask about anything if I needed to, you got yourself into some deeeeeeep trouble! xD. I'm the one who thought I was unnaturally nervous at being touched, if you don't remember.)
Anyway, I was wondering... is it a bad thing to be so shy that you have to look away from the chastest of kiss scenes? I know it's probably just because I haven't been kissed yet that I do this, but I always get really red and look away. It's just my natural reaction. When/if I get a boyfriend, will he think I'm a prude for doing something like that?? Will it be a turn-off?
thanks in advance for your help with my whiny little girl problems! xoxo!
hahaaa, i'm aware :] but it's true, i'm here for you whenevaa you need me !
Oh man, you sound like me when I used to be like that when i was your age haha, the whole "turning red and looking away" thing. It's perfectly normal, you're just not really comfortable with it yet, and don't worry, WHEN [not if haha] you get a boyfriend, he won't think you're prude for doing that, he'll actually think it's cute. [trust me, ive done that infront of my boyfriend and he doesnt think anything of it besides the fact that its cute :)]
It's not a turn off, i've never heard of one guy saying it was a turn off. ever. so don't worry about that. Youre fine, you're normal, I promise :]
anything else you need, im here for yuh :] ! xxo.
I have been with my boyfriend for a year now and things have been great for the most part. I feel that I am successful and have a good job. He has said more than once that he is looking for someone who is his "equal" and not looking for a "dependent" I am quickly getting offended by his comments and thinking about slowing the relationship down. Am I correct in feeling that he is not really here for me and what about the bad times if and when they come??
Hmmm, well, does he know you're getting offended by his comments ? Because he might not be wanting you to take it the wrong way, and he may be complimenting you in his own way, trying to tell you that he thinks he's found his equal .. [you] and he was never looking for a dependent. yuh know ? I mean, sometimes guys just have a really hard time with words, but communication is key, so ask him what he means by that. If he DOES mean it as you are the dependent one, then yes, you have a right to be upset about all of this. I would be upset too.
Think about it this way, if he wasn't really here for you, would he STILL be here after a year ? you could be starting to go through a rough patch, but what you really just need to do is sit down and talk to him about this. express your concerns and get his side of the story also.
And what about the bad time ? every couple has bad times, no one is perfect. my boyfriend and i have been going out for almost 3 months and we have been through so many ups and downs, it's hard to keep a relationship fool proof. If they come, then you'll both deal with it together. It's not as bad as everyone makes it out to be. You just have to have a very talkative relationship full of expressing your feelings.
But if you do suspect that he's not really here for you, here are some signs that will help you decide if he really is drifting away/being here for you or not..
- he doesnt start conversation
- he doesnt look at you in your eyes when you guys are talking
- he seems bored alot with you and just life in general
- he gets mad/frustrated at/with you very easily
- he constantly puts you down; not complimenting you
- he seems distant and doesnt want to talk as much
- he is always making excuses to not be around you
those are just some of the things that could give you an idea of whats going through his head, but honstly, the only thing you can do is TALK to him or nothing will be resolved and things will just get worse. and after you talk things out, and you still want to slow the relationship down, go for it. always follow your heart and trust your gut instinct.
good luck ! hope i helped, and if you need anything else, feel free to inbox me :] xxo.
Its Keri again...you have no idea how much you helped me. I just wanted to give you a big THANK YOU for all of your help. My ex and me are back together. He did ask me to go with him again and we kissed after. No lip action before hand lol. XD You are my favorite advice columnist on here that's for sure. You'll definitely be hearing from me again lol.
Aaah :] !! what did i telll youuu ? hahaa, i knew it'd work outt. This has like made my entire day ! I'm realllly happy that this all worked out for you and he better be good to you haha, which I'm sure he will be :]
and thank you :] that's really sweet of you to say. I'm always heree, so don't hesitate to drop me an inbox with updates or problems !
you go girll, good luck and have funn. ;] xxo.
Anyone know a song about old feelings coming back?
Thanks (:
x
Here are a few ...
- Nelly: over and over
- the red jumpsuit apparatus: damn regret
- all time low: remembering sunday
- Owl city: vanilla twilight
- secondhand serenade: last time
- Mayday Parade: the silence
- Paramore: Miracle
- The Fray: Fall away
good luck :] have fun, hope i helped ! xxo.
Heyy..I stumbled across your column and seen some of your advice and thought Id ask you I hope you dont mind,its just it wasnt showing up publicly when I asked it for some reason
this might be long so sorry but I have to explain it all as best and short I can!
so the title pretty much says it..
my bestfriend who ive litteraly been friends with since I was a baby is moving school.
we go to an all girls school in the city (we live about 20-30minutes outside it) there is a mixed school about 5minutes away from where we live but its not considered to be one of the best if you know what I mean like its pretty much a bunch of wasters out there if im to be blunt heh,
anyway so were going into our 5th year of school (Im not sure what that is in schools elsewhere but its our second last year of school and were 16.)
so she was in out present school up until now so 4years but she always talked about wanting to go to the mixed school but she was never allowed,none of us really knew why she wanted to move because she was happy in our school and its not like we dont have any guy friends theres guys schools right around the corner from us and we know alot of guys out where we live,but her mum and dad eventually gave in and so shes moving. school starts back this thursday and I honestly dont know what im going to do,i mean dont get me wrong ive got alot of other friends too but its not the same if you know what i mean.
like id come into school and wed rush to find each other to tell each other something,wed always go in to school on the first day with each other,i guess im just going to feel lost i dont know how to describe it,everyone always has say their group of friends right and everyone gets on,but like each person has a best friend that they pair up with for stuff if you get me?
its just going to be weird without her.
im also worried were going to drift apart,like we live 10minutes apart but its different when were not in school together we will be doing our own thing we talked and we both promised not to let anything come between us but i cant help feeling that we will drift and become per ocupied with other friends,im worried she will change too because she takes on a different personality around certain people that go to her new school its not good for her,everyones saying it she knows herself she wont work out there either guys there and theese next 2years in school are really important (lol sorry i dont mean to come across as a nerd or anything but you know)
were texting now at the moment and she was sayin how shes depressed,and I said why she said its just starting a new school and end of summer and that.
I asked her was she nervous about school cos thats normal(even though we know alota people who go there) and that i feel the same about summer..
she text back no "its u im gonna miss u :("
so im in tears now..I dont know how to handle this? anyone been in a similar situation?school actually wont be the same we had such a laugh together,lately shes been having second thoughts and whenever people ask her why she wanted to move she hasnt got an answer..ugh I just dont know. I dont even know what im asking at this stage think im just venting... have you any advice? or ever been in this type of a situation..?
so sorry this is so long too
Thanks in advance.
x
It's absolutley no problem :] anytime you need to talk, just inbox me ! hahaa. i don't mind at allll.
Okay, so I know EXACTLY how you feel. I'm in public school and my best friend decided to enroll in a private school. The private school is about 15-30 minutes away, so it's not like I could just be like heyy come visit me or vice versa. It really sucked when she told me, but she wanted a better education, yuh know ? Her aim has always been to get into an ivy league college, and I supported her in her decision, but I was REALLY upset. The thought of going to school without seeing my best friend there sucked. It's like, she was always there when I was crying and when I needed to vent, I'd just find her, but I couldn't just go and find her anymore because she wouldn't be there.
Your friend probably just wants to have a new experience, to go through something different, so she can say she did. yuh know ? she's obviously as upset as you are, but you have to support her and encourage her. Don't let her question her decision to go to this school, its already hard enough, no one should be making it harder for her yuh know ?
I know it's going to be hard for you, trust me, I know. and it's really awesome that you guys live so close to eachother. what me and my friend did was we set a day where we'd ALWAYS hang out, no matter what. That day was Friday. Every single Friday we hung out. It's so we would always see eachother, if you do that, than I promise you, you won't drift apart. you can try to hang out everyday or every other day, but you definetly need to set one day that you always hang out with eachother or this whole "not drifting away thing" won't work at all. Talk to her about that, and im sure it will brighten her day :] don't stop texting eachother and telle eachother EVERYTHING. and in school, if you wanted to tell her something, write it down on a note so you dont forget because it'll make her feel good that you WANTED to tell her these things, but she wasn't there. and it will also help.
also, me and my friend have this notebook we gove eachother. in school when im bored or have some free time, i write in it like its my journal, when actually, it's a journal TO my friend about everything hahaa. it's only for hers and my eyes only, and we pass it back and forth to eachther every friday and we take turns hahaa. you could do that with your friend. its fun and really brings you even closer. it's creative too :]
good luck ! hope i helped, and if you need anything else, im here for yuh ! dont ever be hesitant to ask me a question :] xxo.
Well saturday i havea birthday party i need help on a out fit hres 2 photos do you think the white cardigan or black cardigan is better ?
http://i759.photobucket.com/albums/xx232/HildaJrCarter/blackcardigan-1.jpg
http://i759.photobucket.com/albums/xx232/HildaJrCarter/white.jpg
& also with or with out belt ?
http://i759.photobucket.com/albums/xx232/HildaJrCarter/nobelt.jpg
http://i759.photobucket.com/albums/xx232/HildaJrCarter/blackcardigan.jpg
Thanks =]
The outfit is cute any way you do it, but personally, I like the black cardigan WITH the belt.
have funn ! hope i helped ! and good luck, xxo. :]
Here to give you an update...I might as well tell you my name since I'll be inboxing you lol, I'm Keri. Okay I did what you said I gave my ex a letter telling him exactly how I felt and he told me he really appreciated it and it meant so much to him. He told me he loved me too and he wants to hang out at tomorrow (hooray lol)!! Do you think I should mention anything about us (if we actually have a future together again), or should I try to kiss him or something?? I don't want to seem like I'm trying to pressure him or anything. Maybe I should just go with the flow of things.
hahaa hey keri :]
Alright so ... wow that went well :] ! yayy ! I am sooo happy for you, you don't even knoww.
In my honest opinion, I think he's going to ask you to get back together with him when you guys hang out. I DEFINETLY think asking him about the whole "us" thing is a good idea, because you have a right to know ... but do it towards the end of the night, not the beginning, so you guys aren't being all serious beforehand, yuh know ?
And for the kissing part, see how it goes. If you guys seem to be really flirty and he keeps staring at your lips and seeming like he wants to kiss you, then do it ... but I think you should attempt that AFTER you ask him about the future and what it holds for you both together.
It won't be pressuring him if you just pay attention to his body language and ease into it, not go full blast into anything hahaa, because that would freak him out and/or pressure him into doing something he might not totally be comfortable with. So, just go with the flow. See how hanging out with him goes, and most importantly, HAVE FUN. don't think about it so much. He already said he loves you and that your letter meant alot to him, which is soooo superduper good, by the way. :] you'll be fine, i have a really good feeling about the two of you :] he wouldn't ask you to hang if he didn't want to, trust me.
good luck ! have funnn, and you BETTER tell me how it goes :] xxo.
14/f
I can touch the guy I like without getting nervous about it. I'll be a bit apprehensive, maybe, wondering "Are my hands sweaty? Are they cold? Are they rough???" And all that jazz, but that's normal.
Then, the weirdness happens--he goes to touch me and my insides get all twisted and stay that way for at least 30 minutes and I can still feel his touch for god knows how long. I mean, my insides get REAL twisted. I lose my ability to speak, and I freeze. I get sooo nervous! Not because I don't like him, but because... well, I don't know why! It's not like I don't WANT him to touch me, but when I get all worked up over him laying his hand on my shoulder or arm or something...won't he think I don't like him if I tense up? That's be bad, even if we'll only ever be friends.
help?
That's actually considered normal, hahaa. getting that nervous. I know it has happened to me a couple of times in the past.
He won't think that you don't like him if you tense up, he probably won't even notice. Guys are kind of oblivious to these sorta things and don't really know what's going on in our minds half the time, even if we do get all nervous and flushed and everything. You're just getting really nervous like this becaue you like him and you don't want him to not like you by getting close to you, hence: touching you. But all you can really do is try to get comfortable around him and get used to it.
When this happened to me, I would try to think about other things. Like.. random things. Sometimes I'd think about my dog or school haha, because that always got my mind off of what was going on, like him putting his arm around me or just touching my shoulder. I would try to laugh it off to myself or out in the open, it was kind of like an ice breaker; laughing out loud like that. It lightened the mood and i got less serious ajnd more fun, yuh know ? You're young still, so you have plenty of time to get used to it. Most guys think it's really cute when you get really nervous around them, because it shows that they have that kind of effect on you. But you have to not think about it, because if you think about it, you'll drive yourself insane. I knwo it seems hard, keeping your mind off of what's going on, but you have to try haha. I'm telling yuh, thinking of things other than him touching you in some way will do wonders.
Don't worry so much :] and how do you know you'll only ever be friends ? you don't know what the future holds ... hang out with more and you'll start to loosen up more around him, I promise :] good luck ! have fun, and hope i helped ! if you need anything else, feel free to inbox me, xxo.
ok so I'm back with another crisis. So I like this guy, he and I are really good friends. It was the first day of school and everything is going to be perfect. I chilled with him after school before he went to soccer practice. Than my best friend comes and ask me if I told him how I felt. I said no just waiting for the perfect moment. She tells me that two of my other girlfriends like him. One of them liked him last year when I didn't and went onto a different guy. But now she's back into him and some other guy. The other one just started recently liking him. And now, they have no idea how I feel about him. I thinking of not acting on my feelings because they are two of my closest friends. However, i wanna tell him but I still scared he might reject me and our friendship would be over. So please give some help!!!
This is one of those situations everyone would HATE to be in, and sadly, you're in it :/
Anyways, if I were you, I would go for it, you shouldn't let other people influence you to not go through with this. I know they are 2 of your closest friends, but if they really are that close, than they'll respect your decision to tell the guy you are crushing on that you like him. If they don't know how you feel about him, and you guys haven't talked about it, than it won't matter. It's not like they said anything to you about it, your OTHER friend told you.
You should always follow your heart, even if your mind is telling you not to do something, your heart should be the first thing you listen to because in the end, thats where your feelings lie. And you might always be thinking [if you decide not to go through with it and tell this guy how you feel], "what if i DID tell him, would we be together now? what would have changed?"
Your friends wouldn't and shouldn't be mad at you for doing this. You have feelings too, and it's not like you're doing this intentionally. They can't tell you what to do, or that you can't like him or tell you who to like. and maybe if it would make you feel better, tell them about your feelings. Just be like, "hey i like ______ and I really want to tell him how i feel." so it's like they know, yuh know ? so they can't be like, I CANT BELIEVE YOU DIDNT TELL ME.
Now, if you DO go through with it, and tell him how you feel, it won't ruin the friendship if he rejects you. It will only ruin it if you let it. and everyone is scared of rejection, but if it's a risk worth taking, then go for it. When/if you tell him, just be cool about it. Don't make it seem like you're pressuring him. you could be like, "hey, i don't know if you noticed, but i've started to really like you, and i just wanted to let you know haha :] i mean, i don't know if you feel the same or anything.." something like that so it's low key but getting your feelings out at the same time :] yuh know ?
If he doesn't like you, than oh well. there are other fish in the sea, and maybe in the future he;ll change his mind. just keep talking to him, tell him its okay and move on. You guys can still keep the friendship alive [i would know] but if he DOES like you, than YAYYYY !! hahaa :]
good luck ! hope i helped, and you sound like a great girl, so don't doubt yourself. if you need anything else, feel free to inbox me, xxo.
So I'm ready to ask this girl out, we're friends, and we've been talking a lot lately. Here is more or less what I plan to say, is this good at all? Give me specific suggestions please.
"I’ve really enjoyed getting to know you better over the past couple months, and I feel like we’ve become pretty close since we’ve been talking everyday. To be honest, I am realizing that I’m starting to fall for you and your awesome personality. Basically I would like to know where you think you see this going between us, because I know where I would like to see it go."
awwwww, that is the sweetest thing ever ! it is not just good, it is great ! i hope this works out for you :] and if it does, you sound like you are gonna be an amazing boyfriend ! keep it upp.
good luck, have funn ! hope i helped, xxo.