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Kristina is the name i'm a self taught artist iv'e been a featured advice columnist 9 time’s

advice

so my and my boyfriend of almost 2 years broke up like 2 months ago. we hung out once like about a month after we broke up and everything went well, or so it seemed. he texted me and we were still good friends. i liked it. now he doesn't text me anymore and he rarely texts me back so i texted him saying "i need to ask you something" i want to ask him if were done being friends so i can just give up and move on with my life...problem is he didn't answer me. i know he loses his phone alot but i don't want to make myself seem desperate. i'm fine without a relationship with him but he still means something to me and i want to be friends and i want to know if i'm wasting my time...i don't just want to randomly stop talking to him cause that just brings awkwardness and i really don't want to do that. what should i do?

Wait for him to text you back give him the benefit of the doubt he could be busy don't jump to conclusions so quickly or assume things seeing as you don't know the truth you have a right to know whether or not the two of you are still friends since your curious plus you were dating him at one point i don't think you'll make yourself seem desperate since your just wanting to know a simple question i also don't think your wasting your time i wouldn't give up on this seeing as your curious just be patient & wait probably a couple of days & if he doesn't still continue to wait(:

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So there is this guy at school that i have liked for a long while. We used to talk a little, just say hi and little questions here and there. He is pretty shy. He told me he liked me two weeks ago, so i decided that it would be okay for me to just tell him that i liked him too. I feel like he is too shy though because when we see each other all he will do is smile and give me a hug. I'm the one who tries to make conversations so things aren't so awkward. He won't call me for some odd reason. He will text me, and he doesn't say much.When he does want to hang out, he wants me to go over to his house, and he won't offer to find a way to come get me, or at least meet half way. This pisses me off because i don't chase guys. His friend and I have been tight for a really long while so we are really good buddies. He just told me last week that he liked me and all this other stuff about how he wants to go out with me. Since the guy #1 doesn't really seem to like me, wants me to chase him, i'm getting really sick and tired of it. I was wondering if you guys think it would be weird if I just ignored him from now on. And maybe go on a few dates with the guy that asked me out so i could maybe make him jealous?.....i hope this wasn't confusing...tell me what you guys think i should do? I still like the first guy, but i'm getting really irritated by his behavior...i don't know wether or not to look at it as shy, or if he is acting like he likes me.

I think you should look at it as he's being shy seeing as the way his behavior is ignoring him would
be mean and trying to make him jealous would also be you can't really expect someone to be entertaining through text messages seeing as your talking by a phone i'd give him another chance maybe his behavior and the way he acts will change
if you notice it doesn't then i'd move onto the other guy you like i wouldn't jump to conclusions so quickly he could be waiting for you to make the first move and to see if you will(:

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16/f

i have many insecurities about my boyfriend cheating on me or is flirting with other girls. the reason for that, was because my first boyfriend he cheated on me twice. and i got broken up a couple of times in a row because they started liking another girl by flirting or they were cheating. and my first longest relationship liked his ex girlfriend while going out with me and was talking to another girl in the beginning of the relationship. now my current boyfriend i've been with for about 13 months, he flirted with another girl in the beginning of the relationship. after he got caught, he actually admitted it. the thing is that he is very honest to me and he would actually admit it if he was cheating on me. i spoke to him about my insecurities before and actually told him why and everything, he understood me, but he doesn't exactly know what to do to help me. he said if he was cheating on me, he would tell me straight up and he wouldn't hide it or anything. i know myself he's not cheating o me, but i keep thinking at times that he is. like, whenever he doesn't really answer my text message or phone call even sometimes when i just see him 3 minutes afterwards i feel insecure. so i usually think about the possibilities like he has band practice, he's hanging out with his friends, he's sleeping, he's doing chores or something. but i end up running out of ideas and he ends up calling me later and apologizes saying whatever he did earlier. in the back of my mind or when i run out of ideas i keep thinking he's kissing another girl or having sex with them. i hate it when i think that way. i try whatever i can to ignore it. i try to think positive or think about all the possibilities from before. is there anything i can do?

Just because your last boyfriend cheated on you and did things you didn't agree with doesn't exactly mean that the one your dating now will do the same every boy is different in a way it's a good thing he's honest with you and is willing to admit he did something wrong but you can't stress over him cheating on you and doing other things you've got to trust him part of being in a relationship with someone is being able to trust them you'll make yourself become stressed out if you constantly assume he's doing something bad without you there you can't accuse him of doing something unless you've got proof keep yourself busy that way you won't have time to think about the possiblities and you'll be doing other things

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Okay well me and my boyfriend have been through alot, we've gone out like 10 times . No joke , and each time we broke up we'd miss each other like crazy so we'd get back together . We text , and the thing is i like talking to him on the phone but he just doesnt take the hint . He texts so BORING ! It gets me so frusterated ! He just isnt outgoing through text . When we're together hes sweet and nice , but through text he just bores me to death ! I don't know what to do to get him to just be more upfront and outgoingg ! Please help !

Personally i think it's better to see someone face to face and in person then to text you can't really expect someone to be entertaining through text messages if he's sweet and nice to you while
you two are together then i say text him less and
hang out with him more find something to talk about create conversation maybe he'll start to loosen up and be upfront and outgoing maybe he's just shy and needs time don't rush him(:

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I am 16 years old,I have been haveing sex for about a year now.But i want to get on birthcontrol.
How can i get on it without my mom finding out.She knows i lost it,But i don't want her to know i am on the pill.Just the way I feel.So how can i get on it?

This is a option if you choose to do it call up your gynecologist and make the appointment yourself if you aren't able to drive then find someone who is willing to drive you if you can't find anyone then take a cab if there are any in your area i don't think the doctor will tell your mother if you don't want them too i don't know whether you still being a minor will a affect you
trying to get birthcontrol without your mother knowing but it's worth a shot if for some reason
things don't work out you'll still know you tried it's better then not doing nothing at all

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okey doke

there is this guy who is ayear older then me who goes to my school and added me on facebook out of the blue when i have never talked to him and like a week later he is in the cafeteria and i look at him and then he sees that and he eyes went HUGE and then he continued to stare and lately all of his friends smile at me and so does he and stares constanly do ya think he likes me or is just being friendly idk thnx!

I think he likes you seeing as he added you on Facebook without him giving you a warning it could
mean that he's curious about you and wants to get to know you try and confront him and create conversation see how it goes it's worth a shot and if for some reason things don't work out you'll still know you tried trying is better then not doing anything at all and you regretting that you didn't do anything so your best option is to confront him and see what happens and how things go(:

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So lately I've been getting IMs from a LOT of people (including people I barely/never talk to), all saying things like "check out my new pics! [link] " or "this reminds me of you [link]" etc. basically all have a random statement and a link to some obscure location, etc.

i haven't clicked on anything. but i'm pretty sure it's a virus because these messages KEEP coming (like every once in a while) from the same people and they're the SAME messages from every person.

how exactly does this 'virus' or wahtever it is work? and does it do anything else other than force you to spam your entire buddy list?

I don't think it does anything elese iv'e had things happen like that while on Msn if it's annoying then contact Aim and report it depending on what version of Aim you've got you'll have to find the contact link they'll probably be able to fix it so it doesn't happen again i just usually close out the conversation don't click on the link seeing as it's probably a virus run your virus protection program whatever you use to scan for viruses maybe that will get rid of it but if it doesn't then your best option is to just contact Aim(:

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he told me on wednesday that we need to take a break becuase he needs time.
and i asked him how long he wont talk to me for and he said idk.
everything has been fine between us so that whole needing a break thing seriously came out of nowhere.
were in a long distance relationship so i dont understand why he needs a break. its not like we get to see eachother alll the time like normal couples.

ive called and texted him a bunch of times and have gotten nothing back. its been three days since he hasnt talk to me and its killing me.
no matter what i say to him, he wont talk to me.
i dont know what to do :[
help meee!

I think if you continue to text and call him tons of times your making the situation worst
for yourself respect what he said that he needs a break be patient and wait for him to call you he will when he's ready everything happens for a reason
you can't keep trying to force him to talk to you if
he wants space just be patient and once he's ready to talk then he will don't become clingy(:

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So I've liked this guy for about a year, since I met him. I'm pretty sure I like him. Ok I like him a lot. I really do and it bothered me so much that he didn't know. Everyone was telling me to tell him and that we would be so cute together.

So now he knows... I asked him today if I could tell him something and then I told him that I really like him and that it's been bothering me and that I just wanted him to know. All he had to say back was ight.
Of course that made me feel crappy... but is there still a chance me and him could be together? Or should I forget about it?.. even though I really like him.. =/

I don't get to talk to him much either and it sucks, I just see him a lot and I have one class with him at school.

I think there's a chance if his feelings change and if he gives you a better answer then he did try talking to him again and see what happens and how the conversation goes casually bring up the fact you like him it's worth a shot there's always a possiblity of things changing but if they
don't then i think it's best for you to move on there's plenty of other boys out there he's not the only one if he gives you a one word answer again or says something worst then things weren't meant to be between you two

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ok, so i was with my ex bf for a year, he's the boy i lost my virginity too and was basically my first everything so the break up was really really hard to deal with, anyway, we broke up at the beggining of September, so its been a few months and sense we broke up i've talked to a few guys but always in the back of my head while talking to them was the fact that i knew i was just trying to get over my ex. So naturally none of them went any farther than a friend. Just like a week ago however i started talking to a new boy and things are going really good. like, things are different with him, i actually have feelings for him, and i'm not just talking to him to make myself feel better. The thing is, i'm terrified, i'm so scared to put myself back out there again after being hurt so bad the last time. I wanna know how to, not get over the past because i know its not that easy, but i guesse i just need some help on what to do. Should i just not talk to guys for a while till i'm not scared anymore ? Or is this something that i just need to get over with time.. please help :(

lmb 17/f

There's nothing you can do about you getting back together with your ex what's done is done not every
boy is the same just because your last relationship
wasn't the best doesn't exactly mean that things could go wrong there's always a possiblity of that happening but you can't think negatively you've got to think postively and be confident i think you shouldn't talk to boys for a while seeing as you don't seem confident and you seem unsure of what to do once you feel fully ready to talk and you aren't scared anymore then i say go for it it's worth a shot but until then it's probably best you don't talk yes i think you'll overcome this within time(:

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i have a sister that is in to drama,I've only meet her one time and she never takes the time to get to know me.Well she likes to believe every thing my mom says about me and my mom doesn't know anything about me because my dad raised me. she likes to make up stories to tell me sister telling her I'm crazy.well my sister found one of my other sisters and was telling her all kinds of stuff about me and my other sister asked if i grow up with her of course i didn't but she made it sound like she did.Well she picks who her family is and she doesn't talk to me.I just want to cut her out of my life.I wanted to talk to her about how i feel but she'll run and tell my mom everything because she's two-faced

I think if she doesn't take the time out to get to know you well then it's her loss as far as her believing everything your mother says she's being gullible and believing everything she hears she's just assuming things and doesn't know what's true and what's not you can't cut her out of your life completely seeing as she is your sister but you can choose to not speak to her seeing as she's not wanting to know you she's being self centered and only thinking of herself i think she needs to stop acting childish and grow up she should get her facts straight and quit telling lies to your family members i think she is wanting attention and that's
maybe why she's doing what she's doing that could be a possiblity

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im 15 years old. and weigh about 165 pounds. i hate everything about me. im fat and ugly. my sisters 19 and i hate seeing her. shes so pretty and skinny. but everyone says we look exactly alike. i think im suffering from depression. i need help. its not normal to hate urself. i hate myself. i wish i was dead sometimes. people call me fat and ugly and i cry my eyes out and i feel like a little baby for it. i need help asap. i barely goto school. cuz im always worried about how i look and i hate it . i hate myself so much =[

Tell your parents to take you to a therapist talking helps it's better then keeping everything
your feeling bottled up inside and not saying anything at all that's unhealthy you'll feel better
once you talk you'll feel relieved everyone has things they don't like about themselves or they'd like to change it's normal to feel that way luckily
you can change yourself and become better gain confidence believe in yourself don't think negatively think postively your in control of your
life and only you if you aren't satisfied with something then change it until you are you shouldn't
wish death upon yourself there's others out there who aren't as lucky as you are(:

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I recently got my wisdom teeth out (last friday, so about 6 days ago) and i'm really worried, because it seems that my whole upper part of my mouth has shifted FORWARD,leaving me with an overbite and space in between my top* and bottom* teeth (which i didn't have before) I'm reaaaally upset, because my teeth where in great shape before the surgery, i just got my braces off last year.I now talk with a slight lisp because of it. And now i have this ugly,horrible overbite and i'm scared that its permanent! I still have a good amount of swelling in the back of my teeth, and also have trouble stretching my jaw- so my main question is-

Is this over-bite permanent or is it just because i still have some swelling in the back of my mouth? Will it ever go back to normal?

Please help, i've looked everywhere, and i'm really upset. :/

I don't think it's permanent i had two teeth taken out because of my braces that i had to get in the past and the gap i had is no longer there i'm not a dentist or a surgeon your best option is to go see
the doctor that removed your teeth they would probably be able to give you a answer iv'e never experienced getting my wisdom teeth removed(:

Hope you feel better

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So I keep having these dreams in black in white where everything is dark and there's like a small scene. like one time I came out of my cousins house and there was a strange man there then I hear a scream but it slowly fades and I wake up and my muscles are very tense. I think it's because I have just started to fall asleep. Then I had a dream of a man outside a parking lot with my friend and then I hear the scream fade and I wake up, paralyzed again but I CAN move out of it, I just feel so tense. but the one that scared me the most was last night when I dreamt a man came to my house and shot my family...yet it came from the mans perspective, going to each room in the house but he left my house before he got me. Then I woke up and this time it was the gun shot sound that faded away. My muscles were tense. These dreams are really strange, and in black and white when usually i dream in color. I'm so confused, what do they mean?

We don't know the exact reason why we dream the things we do things just happen whatever you watch before bed your most likely to dream about while sleeping so maybe you watch something on tv and that's the reason why you've been dreaming what you have if your concerned or curious you should probably contact your doctor they would be able to
give you a better answer you could also look into going to a sleep clinic or center and they'll montior your sleep run some tests and do whatever they have to and find out why your dreams are happening maybe something from your past is causing the dreams black and white could mean darkness no light

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18/m in college

I recently broke up with my girlfriend. The issue was that about 4 months ago for whatever reason I started to worry about my future with her. We were long-distance and it had been about 3 months since our last visit and I think that I was starting to feel really far away from her. I couldn't conjure up the immense happiness I used to always feel when thinking about her and I guess I just started to worry that I was loosing my love for her. It started out only being something that would happen occasionally, but as the months went by, I began to worry and worry about it more and more. We used to always have great friendly conversations, no pressure, just talking, we were best friends. After a 3 months of this worrying though, I couldn't talk to her without starting to worry. Conversations might start out okay, but once the thought of that worrying would pop into my mind, the anxiety would hit me and I wouldn't enjoy talking anymore. I don't think I even knew what I was worried about. I just couldn't enjoy talking to her. we finally saw each other about 3 weeks ago and it was the same kind of deal. I we would really enjoy our time together, but I still had this thing in the back of my mind and when I thought about it only the slightest bit, I wouldn't be able to have fun. After I got home, I decided enough is enough and I ended the relationship. I felt horrible about it. but I just couldn't enjoy interactions with her anymore.

I think that through my worrying, I DID loose my love for her to some extent. It got to the point where, although we might get along well, I didn't feel the same way I used to feel about her. I miss everything we used to have so much and at the time, I don't think I even realized that i was worrying way too much. I don't think I even realized that was what the problem was.

I wish I could start over with her, but I just WORRY that if we do, I will put too much pressure on making things work and my negative thinking will only make things fail. I recognize now that my worrying is crippling, but I'm having the worst time trying to stop. I feel so weak against it. I cant get rid of it. any suggestions? Christian perspectives are welcome.

You can't stop yourself from feeling the way you do
if you think you'll worry then i think that ending the relationship was a good idea there's no point in being with someone if you aren't happy the main thing that truely counts in the end is that your happy and if you aren't then it's probably not worth it plus if you aren't interested then you won't have the same feelings like you used to it's not healthy to worry and have anxiety i don't think things were meant to be between you two you shouldn't have to worry about putting to much pressure and trying to make things work if things were meant to be then things would work themselves out and if they didn't then that means it wasn't meant to be

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18 year old male
i've been with my girlfriend for about more than 4 months.. our relationship have been on and off for a while and recently we broke up. But today she stopped by my house and it surprised me and she wanted to be close to me.. she didnt tell me she was going to stop by or anything, she walked home from work which isnt too far from our neighborhood and she said that she wants me, but the problem is out of the 2 weeks that we've been away i've been working my way to get out of her grasp, because we keep breaking each other's heart.. i hate going back and forth like this because i want to have a stable life. one side of me is screaming to have her but another side of me is wanting to pull away.. it affects my school work and my mood.

I don't think you should take her back seeing as it's affecting your school work and mood there's no point of being in a relationship if you aren't happy the main thing that truely counts in the end is that your happy and if you aren't then it's not worth it it seems like she's being clingy seeing as she wanted to be close to you i think even if you did get back together with her your relationship would probably still continue to be on and off seeing as you aren't interested anymore i say just focus on your school work there's plenty of chances for love and it would be ashame if your schooling got messed up because of a girl and relationship problems

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17 f
im sorry if its a little long its a long story but i would apreciate it if u guys read the whole thing. ok so about a month ago i met a really cute 20 yea old guy. he asked me to hang out alot of times but i wasnt able to. this saturday night i was able to and we met up at his house. i asked my sister (whose 20 yrs old also) to take me. so she took me and i was at his house just talking we did makeout like once and by the time i got home i was already totally hooked on this guy. he seemed like a good guy. so sunday rolled around and he asked me to hang out and i brought my sister and cousins. we went bowling then to a cafe. i was really nervous and never spoke muh but i noticed him and my sister spoke alot and my ousin even told her that he might like her. in the end the date was horrible me and him barely spoke i got mad and didnt even bother speaking to him. when i got home i felt bad and called him he said it was ok and i thanked hm for paying for bowling and the dinner. so the next day (morning) my sister told me that she didnt trust him at all, he looked like a player and he had 80 something unread messages on his phone. he was also really paranoid about it and didnt want anyone seeing it. i found that weird and knew i couldnt trust. ok so monday my sister goes out says its with her friends and i stay home. i texted the guy (nate) and called him he didnt answer. my sister gets home with a hickey. i asked her where she got it from she said it was her ex. which they still talk and im pretty sure she still has feelings for him.(her ex).next day one of nates friends whose very nice called me and said did you know where your sister was last night? i asked her she said it wasnt what i was thinking. she said her and my cousin (whose 24) made a plan to see if they can trust him. she said he had texted her that night and asked her to hang out and she said she went to see how far he would go. and that she was only trying to protect me.she said to forgive her and that they went to watch a movie as friends and he invited her inside then tap kissed her and started giving her a hickey she said she got mad and left. and my older cousin (whose very protective of me) said not to tell me anything becuase they wanted to tell me together about nate. heres what i dont understand. that night she told me to lets make a plan but i said NO becuase i didnt want to find out atleast not now if he was a player. they went behind my back and did this trick yes offcourse im never talking to him again but what do i do about her? everytime i look at her i see them making out. thats not right she knew how much i liked him.i knew he couldnt be trusted and yes it hurts becuase i really liked him but i am more hurt becuase of my sister. she said she was only trying to protect her and to forgive her she didnt mean for it to go that far but once he was so close she couldnt stop. she admitted to being wrong and asked for forgiveness. i cant. i dont find it in my heart right now to forgiv her i feel betryaed, eventhough she said she was trying to help me. i was sos tupid i was the one trying to help me get rid of that hickey so my parents dont see it. i have t admitt when she got home she started crying, and was paranoid. i dotn know why she did this she was my best friend and was always there for me. i didnt want to know if he was a player atelast not now, and not this way. i cant stop crying all i can think about is them making out. and her hickey. this wasmonday night and that hickey is still there and she said it was like a 3 sec thing and she knew she was doing wrong and left. but she is a little dark skin that hickey wouldve nevr been that bad, if it was 3secs would it have? should i forgive her? i feel so desperate betrayed i spoke to my cousin she said that they were only trying to help me. i can get that image out o my head though. im crying as im typing this sorry i just needed to let it all out. please help? i spoke to my cousin she said that they were planning on telling me together on thursday, thats why my sister didnt say anything to me. i told my sis you couldve gone and made the plan but as soon as he was leaning in to kiss you you shouldve backed off. she keeps apologizing and saying everyone makes mistake. but she keeps saying shes not sorry for doing the plan becuase she didnt want me to be hurt in the end. well how does she think i feel now? its worse now becuase its her she meant everything to me. .

You'll have to forgive her evenually you can't hold a grudge aganist her forever seeing as it's not healthy but you have every right to feel upset and angry right now i agree she should of backed away and shouldn't of kissed him if she knew that you liked him she wouldn't have the hickey it's true everyone makes mistakes and in your sitaution it was a simply a mistake everything happens for a reason you shouldn't allow a boy to come in between
you and your sister i'm sure she still loves and cares for you so yes i do think you should forgive her at some point(:

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he says he does, but shows it never and recently kicked me out. why doesnt he love me?

I'm sure he loves you but doesn't show it some men have a hard time showing how they feel if your concerned then confront him and ask why he kicked you out if he hasn't told you the reason already talk to him and spend time with him so your relationship starts to get better maybe then he'll let you back into the house(:

Good luck!

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19/f
I've been with my boyfriend for about two years. We recently broke up for a few days but decided to get back together and try our hardest to solve our problems and change things. While we were broken up, he told me that if we didn't end up back together, he was going to join the air force. However, he wouldn't if we were still together, since he didn't want to be away from me for that long. I really think being in the air force would be good for him, and there's nothing else he really wants to do with his life. I love him a lot, and I want to do what's best for him and not be selfish.
So what's the right thing to do? End things now (I think we're just not ready to be in a relationship now anyway, we need time) so he can do what he wants? (I would wait for him no matter what.) Or do the selfish thing and stay with him?

I think you should end it seeing as you feel that the both of you aren't ready to be in a relationship and you both need time there's no point of in being in a relationship if you aren't happy i'd let him join the air force if that's what he really wants to do there's always plenty of chances for relationships but there may not be plenty of chances to join the air force and experience it if you truely love him then i think you should allow him to do what he wants that way you'll be pleased and happy too(:

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This February, I am going to Costa Rica for a week to volunteer to take care of children at an orphanage. It is through an organization I found online where people from all over the country sign up and go on volunteer trips. A couple of my friends were thinking about coming with me, but the money was kind of a problem (yes, you have to pay to volunteer) and they aren't going to end up going. I am still going though. I think it is ok to go by yourself.. I mean it sounds like something where people will be coming by themselves, because it's not through a church group or something. I mean, it's not like I am going to be alone, because I will be working with a group. I just hope everyone doesn't come in their own groups already, because I don't want to be the odd one out. Do you still think it will be a good experience?

Yes i do think it will be a good experience for you you shouldn't back out like you said you'll be with a group of people so you won't be completely alone you'll be helping others and that will make you feel good like you accomplished something you'll also get to see what Costa Rica's like and everything it has to offer i think you'll be fine by yourself i don't think you'll make careless decisions(: Enjoy!

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