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Website: Straight UP Advice Onedayatatime
Gender: Female
Member Since: October 10, 2008
Answers: 68
Last Update: November 1, 2008
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OK, well I have this student teacher in my 5th hour. He's a good friend of my dad, and I have been over to his house a few times..but of course with my parents.
So, one day I totally didnt get my homework, so he suggested that I could go over to his house so we wouldnt have to stay later after school or anything. Cause I always meet with my friends after school. He asked my parents and they said ok, and I was thinking like ok. and i didnt really think. so when we got to his house he said to go in his bedroom and we'll do it in there and i thought that was weird why dont i just do out on the table. but he insisted that we do it in his bedroom. so i said fine ok, i went into his bedroom and i siad i had to go the bathroom so when i came out, he was on the bed naked...i tried to run out of the room but he wouldnt let me...he threw me down on the bed..and he was tea-bagging me. then i started yelling get off of me your sick..but when i did that he put his penis in my mouth. then i took it out and he yelled at my saying if you dont do everything i say then i am gonna kill you..so at that point imma like ok, i will because i didnt want to lose my life because of him. he made my strip all my clothes off and have vaginal sex, oral sex, and anal sex. he made me suck his dick and he fingered me...so by that time i was getting into it and i was sorta enjying it..it felt so good, i know thats nasty, but i dont know if i should like it..i know techinally hes my teacher but it feels so good..but is it normal for me to like it...even if it is very, very disguisting? (link)
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ADVICE
Let me be honest with you and tell you a little story about myself. I was raped when I was 17, I was still a virgin at the time when this happened. I felt so ashamed of myself for allowing something like this to have ever happened to me. My thoughts where why was I not smart enough to see this comming. How come I was not strong enough to stop it. I was confused and hurt and not really sure what to do. I never told anyone for a long time. But when I was 19 it happened again this time by a differant guy. He was forceable with me and even held a gun to my head threatened to kill me. I was very scared because I worked with this guy, and had to face him everyday. It was so hard knowing what he had done and not feeling like I could turn to anyone because my life was at stake. That guy eventually did move away and he got caught. I finally did tell my parents about both rapes. There reaction was not what I expected though, in fact they flat out asked me what did I do, for these guys to rape me. The facts are I did nothing to influence the action of these guys. Men like these are predators and pray on the weak or volnerable. The fact that he is a teacher puts him in a prime position to do this to many, many girls, if he had not already. The facts are this he most likely had been with others girls because it was very easy for him to be this way with you. Second is what STDS or other things he may have given you. Third if no sexual protection was involved there is a possibliity of being pregnant. So for all those reasons you need to see a doctor right there. If you are scard to tell your parents or are worried with even your friends knowing. Go to a free clinic get checked out and tell someone there. As far as your parents know its a regualar check up. But ask for a nurse when you are their someone who is a feamle. Tell the nurse everything and who the teacher was that did this. The nurse at the clinic or doctors office can help you handle everything from there. If you ask them to and say that you prefer your parents not to know they should repect that especially when a threat on your life was made. Please sweeite dont let this teacher get inside your head and let that fear set in. Because once you let him win, he will continue to be this way for a long long time. How many girls will have to deal with all these fears, worries and hurt. STOP HIM! I am willing to help anyway I can, in any way shape or form. I will do anything to see this guy behind bars, where he should be. You may not see it now, but mentally he has already messed you up. Phyically harmed you, and took you by force. This teacher having to place a threat on your life, tells you right there he KNEW what he was doing and he was dead wrong for doing it. PLEASE< PLEASE PLEASE do what I suggested, and dont lose touch with me.......
Take a long look into your heart and do what needs to be done, you are not alone
onedayatatime
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This is just a curiosity question. If a woman worked for very powerful men in a large corporation for many years as the powerful men’s secretary but no longer works for them (she hasn’t seen them in 11 years) do you think the powerful men still keeps tabs on her. Keep in mind they were very possessive of her and the bosses either treated her as a sister or a daughter.
(link)
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ADVICE
Well if these people looked at her like a sister or a daughter, they might just keep track of her. When people work at any job for any extended period of time part of that work place, can become like a second family. So yes I feel this is something that is very within reason. I myself still have contact with a few people I worked with at one time or another. These people became my friends and when you care about them, the work situation is no longer the issue. So when jobs ends, it does not mean that the friendships or feelings ever stop. So if you where just curious about, if this is something that really happens my answer to you is yes. It happens very often. As far as the former boss or others being possessive, the stronger the bond they had, the stronger the possessiveness will become. It just comes along with having the feelings of a second family. They are not related but yet you cant tell the differance. So I hope this helped you out, let me know what you think...
Take a deep breath, and always remember to take it ondayatatime.
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Would the remark my mom made bother you?: I (age 53) cleaned out my closet and dresser drawers and had 14 bags of clothing to give away. However, yesterday I decided to go thru the bags to make sure that I did not give away anything accidentally. I found 10 items that I accidentally put in the bags so I took them out and put them in my drawers and closets. I was home alone yesterday. Today before I was going to load the bags into the car and take them to the clothing drop my mom (age 82) saw me going thru the bags.
Mom: “What are you doing?”
ME: “I am going thru the bags to make sure I did not get rid of anything accidentally”
Mom: Oh why are you looking there is nothing worthwhile there”
ME: “Yes there is because yesterday I checked the bags as well and found things in there that I did not mean to give away so I was checking one last time."
My mom gave me a look of disbelief.
Then we had some fight. I said really nasty horrible things to her which I feel terrible about. Some of the things I said to her I would never even say to my worse enemy. My nasty remarks made her cry.
During the fight:
ME: “I will show you what I took out”
Mom: “Ok let me see” (she said this in a nasty voice)
You see I got mad because all she had to say “Ok just go thru the bags and double check” but instead she challenged me or that is what I was interpreting it as.
So how would you have interpreted it?
(link)
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ADVICE
Well all people place values on things that are important to them. Weather its a shirt or a watch. We all have items we value on a sentimental level. Given your mothers age and her responce though, people that age are very set in their ways. Something that seems pointless or meaningless to her may not be to you. However how you handeled her responce concerns me. Seems like there is more behind that blow up than just what you where doing at that time. If you view your mother as insentive to things that matter to you, there has to be more history behind this blowup. Sounds to me that you had anger towards her about other things that you where holding in for awhile. When people reach an age such as your mother they often will speak without thinking first. It happens to all of us. So I would have a good long heart to heart with your mother, and get things off your chest that you may have needed to do for some time now. Work things out and try to build the best relationship you can letting go of harsh feelings. Your mother will hopefully be here a long time, but you never know when her last day will be. So have a clear mind about how your relationship with her and where you stand. Try to be a little more open with her and have some more patience. All older people age in several ways, but the most common thing about ageing is our memmory gets jaded and things that used to come easy, are now a struggle. This means in every aspect too, convorsation, mobility, and judgement. So just keep in mind that when you get to be her age, and you dont think before you speak, how would you want someone to handle your responce? I hope this helps let me know what you think, and keep in touch...
Just remember to always take a deep breath, think before you react and take it onedayatatime.
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can u get any sexual diseases from masterbating cuz ive been doing it lately and ive notice a bump and some white dots and ive never had sex before (link)
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ADVICE
If you have never had sex before I would say that having any kind of disease is very unlikely. Masterbation alone without any other body fluids from a partner makes this even more unlikely. I would recommend seeing a doctor if this does not clear up though. I would say try not to masterbate for a few days if you can, and see if it clears up on its own. If not then I really would go see a doctor and have it looked at. Skin irration from friction can irrtate the skin, when your doing it alot. If your using any kinds of lotions or lubricants sometimes they can cause some side effects depending on how sensative your skin is. Other than that I am really not sure what would cause this. So like I suggested take a break for a little bit and see if it clears up, If it does not have it looked at. I hope this helps, let me know what you think....
Always remember take a deep breath and take it onedayatatime
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I wasn't really invited, but my boyfriends mom was all nice to me and stuff she invited me in to my bfs suprise party. I was there for about 2 hours or something and then all the sudden two boys that were my friends came in and she pretty much kicked me out, well she said i have to leave and so do the other girls. well two other girls stayed. well its not my boyfriends fault. but im mad at him for some reason. wat do i do? (link)
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ADVICE
Well honey I would not stay mad at your boyfriend. If his mother asked you to leave for any reason there is not really anything he could have done to make you feel better. He himself has to listen and respect his mother's wishs even if he does not like it. As far as the other girls that got to stay, I think I would maybe be more curious or hurt by that one. I would be thankful for the time you did get to spend there and be happy you where included. Think of it this way, would you want your boyfriend to be mad or upset with you, if your mother did that to him?
I suggest just asking your boyfriend why you think his mother acted that way. Maybe even asking him why did those other girls get to stay when you where not allowed and how unfair that seemed to you. As far as staying mad at him, I think thats really not very fair to him at all, when he had no control over it. So you need to let it go honey don't be angry with him. It might even make him angry at you if you take it out on him. Just talk to him like I said ask those questions, if he has no answers then he really probaby doesnt know either. WE all have to do what are parents want when we live at home, and alot of times we dont like it. I hope this helps you out, best of luck keep in touch..
Remember to take a deep breath and take it onedayatatime
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I live in an apartment and the family across from me love to party late at night. Almost every night they have a party with their friends. They have small children and the kids are left unattended in the hallway while the adults drink beer and various other forms of alcohol. The children run up and down the hallways, screaming and yelling, while the adults are inside drinking. Once in a while, someone comes and screams at the children to, "Quiet down!" but this only keeps them quiet for a few minutes. Sometimes the children even start to bang against my door--in the middle of the night!
Just for note, my mother works late nights so I am usually home with my little sister. I talked to my mother about this problem but she says she cannot do anything since she hasn't witnesses any of this yet.
All of this noise keeps me awake at night and it's difficult for me since I have school the next morning. I get little or no sleep, but I'm more concerned for my little sister actually. She has a sleep disorder and frequently has insomnia. She has enough trouble trying to get to sleep at night without all of this partying going on across the hall. Sometimes the partying will wake her up after an hour or so of sleep and then she'll be up all night long in a miserable state. The family isn't having a party right now and my little sister is finally sleeping, but they could start later (I'm hoping they won't have one at all) because they usually start later in the evening. In my city 10:00pm is the limit for any kind of noise that might disturb others. It's already 9:34pm now and they usually start around this time.
I'm not blaming the children, by the way. I know the noise is not really their fault, but it's their parents' fault for leaving them unattended. I just am not sure what to do! It was suggested that I call the police for noise disturbance and since the adults leave the YOUNG children unattended so often...should I?
How should I handle this?
Call the cops?
Confront the neighbors?
Tell the apartment manager?
Pretend it doesn't happen and hope it goes away? (link)
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ADVICE
Well honey I would should suggest talking to the apartment manager first. The reason I say this is because you need to go to someone who will do this in a low attetnion type mannor. If you know the apartment manager well enough to trust him, I would ask him to check up on the situation usually around the times you say this all starts. If the apartment manager is willing to keep your and your families name out of it I think that would be best since you are neighbors. If the apartment manager sees first hand what these people are doing its best for him to call the police and handle it. Situation like this where the children are unattended like you have stated DCF can and might even get involved. So I would let an adult you can trust other than your mother handle this one. Refrain from calling the cops yourself being your mother is not there at night, dont want you guys to get in any trouble yourself for any reason. Also if you did call the police yourself the neighbors you reported wold most likely see the police talking to serveral people on that floor. So my best opinion is to let the apartment manger deal with this tell him everything you had said here so he knows all the details. If he is the kind of person who cares about the building and the people living there he should be more than happy to do this and take the pressure off you. I hope this helps you out, let me know what you think..
Remember to take a deep breath and take it onedayatatime..
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Hi I am a 19 yr. old female and the guy I like is 20. I am having a hard time trying to realize everything that has happened. He has been my really good friend since last year, and never in my life would I have thought of him as someone I would be interested in. But just recently, in a weird random way we brought up making out with each other as mutual friends...I didn't mind so we have on different occasions. I was in denial that I didn't have feelings for him when this happened, because obviously people that usually kiss each other would have some kind of physical attraction? But yea, of course while this happened my feelings have been brought out more intensely. I didn't just like him because of that, but we have common interests as well. We are both musicians and we write and play songs together. We both share our secrets and love to talk about our daily lives.
Now here is the thing. I don't know if I should tell him how I feel, because we discussed it was a mutual thing and it shouldn't develop feelings. He is a guy that is very mysterious as well. He has told me straight up that he's not looking for a relationship or a committment based on his previous experiences, and just wants to have "fun". I knew that... but this is what happened to me. But I feel in my heart that he may have hidden feelings for me, because I sense something. I think that he does but is scared to take risks or be out there, scared to fall for me and be in a relationship which he might not be ready for. He's told me himself maybe thats why he is still single today... I am sensing mixed emotions from him. He's told me he really cares about me and doesn't want to continue this because it is way too "hot" and he wants to try sexual things. He said he really cares and feels like he might betray me in a way..
But all in all this is all confusing me. I've noticed the small details as well, that I wouldn't say is normal behavior. Like a guy kissing you on the forehead passionately after hugging him...is that a sign that he does like me? I've never seen him do that before...and he is usually looking for me when I'm not around. Always offers me a ride home.. you get the picture. I just don't know if I should pursue anything if he is in this "fun" state of mind, though I think he may have feelings for me. Should I give it time to blossom and for him to realize something of should I move on with my life until the opportunity opens up? I just don't know what to do. I really like him. I hope he likes me back. (link)
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ADVICE
Well you came to the right person to ask this question. I have gone through this situation first hand. I am with a guy who is my best friend, I was not attracted to him for his looks at first it was his personality that really drew me to him. MY best friend as well told me he never wanted a relationship, and cared about me but not in the way I cared for him. I have been with my best friend now for going on past six years and we are still together to this day. This was a long hard road though for even us. When a guy is your friend and he is scard he will say all the things you have mentioned above and then some. My best friend who I am still with, it took him almost four years before he could tell me straight up why he keep doing what he was doing and said what he said. So I am going to share this information with you. My now boyfriends fears back then where things like, when h felt to close or started to have deeper feelings he would do things intentionally to mess things up with him and I. He told me it was because he was afraid of being deeply hurt, and would do things without really understanding it all himself. After talking with my own best friend/boyfriend we have dove deeper into why those things took place. One thing that really scard him was that fact that he had never really been in a serious relationship. His longest relationship was one year. That girl stopped all over his heart and they where engaged to get married. That girl had told him she was not ready for anything like that, and he bleieved her. My best friend then found out not even two week later his now X girlfriend was seeing a new guy. He keep track of her to a point and found out it did not take to long for them to become engaged and set a wedding date. It crused him, and from that point on he viewed woman as a threat. He would keep things fun, sexual, or just hang out. But the main point is from that experiance alone he viewed woman as he ddidnt want anything serious again. He went through fazes of seeing more than one person at once. Just having flings, but always keep his deep emotions blocked off, or he would walk away when he thought he might have any. This guy you like sounds like something happened to him that is keeping him from being deeply emotional with you. I agree with you he is showing you all the signs that their is more feelings than he is willing to admit to you. My suggestion is this, dont force the way you feel about him directly on him, or he will get a bit freaked out. Stand by him and tell him how much you care for him and like him. Dont push a relationship because it will take some time before his guard will come down enough to really admit any deep feelings at all. I stuck it out through thick and thin and proved to my best friend I meant what I said. Soon it sunk into his thick skull and he had no choice but to realize I was being honest and meant what I said. Hang in their honey I know its not easy, but we all need time to heal, and sounds like if you back up what you say and he sees it eventually he will believe it. ( So you dont go anywhere) Eventually he will be able to tell you about deeper feelings he is having. I hope this helps keep in touch and let me know how things are going...
Always remember take a deep breath and take it Onedayatatime...
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A lot of people probably wont understand this. But I fell in love with someone on the internet. Like REALLY fell in love, for the first time in my life. He wants to talk on the phone and you know...but I'm worried about what I will sound like and I've never had "phone sex" so I don't want to sound bad or embarrass myself. I dont think he will, but what if he starts calling me all the time? Any comments/suggestions are greatly appreciated :] (link)
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ADVICE
You should do what you feel comforable with. But some tips on how to handle the phone sex thing if it ever did get to that point is this. Let him talk sexy to you on the phone and just listen, you can just respond with ya. I have done that a few times. You dont really have to say much if the guy is a talker. When typing online with him it should give you a pretty good of an idea of how he might be on the phone. So keep chatting online. Get comfortable with him on the phone just talking for awhile first. Then when your ready to take that next step you will know. As far as online love, its really not that uncommon. People have met online and even have gotten married. Its rare but not impossible. So dont let what others say bring you down. One last thing, doing something for the first time even though your nervous can be very fun and exciting. The great thing about doing something like this over the phone is they cant see the shocked looks on your face, or you kindof giggling and covering up the phone. Not saying that you would but that has happened to me. I hope this helps lets me know what you think.....
Take a deep breath and take it onedayatatime
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So there's this guy, and he's my neighbor; but his sister's are bestfriend's with my brother. So it makes him a total no-no. But I just can't help myself but to like him. I'm in eighth grade, but he's in tenth. Everything about it's wrong. Do you think I like him because I know he's off limits ? What should I do ?! (link)
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ADVICE
Well I think if you really do like this guy, maybe you should tell your brother how you feel about this. If your brother is friends with this guy's sisters why is that ok but you cant like this guy? Maybe if you are honest with your brother and get more insight on why its such a no no it might help. I dont know why your brother would be so against it, unless he thinks this guy you do like is bad news. Another thing is do you think this guy really does like you? If this is in a crush faze of sorts I would just keep things the same for now. If later on you do find out that this guy does like you and your still feeling the same way about him, you really do need to be upfront with your brother. Brothers are funny that way they will lay down the law to try to protect you, why you stand by and watch them do whatever they want. Be patient till you have all the facts about everything. Then you can see what direction you need to go in. I hope this helps let me know what you think...
one step at a time take it always onedayatatime
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I have very sensitive skin. It's normal-dry mostly dry. At the end of days, its oily. I have acne on my forehead, chin, nose, and area around the nose. About 80% of the acne are those bumps that aren't big and red but the small under the skin bumps you can see and its really annoying. I've used sooo many acne products and nothing seems to work. It either dries out my face or makes things worse. I got Pro-Active about 5 months ago thinking that it would clear my skin, but it didn't. Its very harsh on my face and dries it out..i even got rashes on my lip from it. I need something that is soft on my skin, but hard on my acne. It can't dry out my face, it needs to leave it hydrated. Does anyone know ANYTHING that can work on my face?
p.s. brands like dermalogica, clean and clear, neutrogena, clearasil ect. don't work on me. I need something more medicated.. (link)
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ADVICE
Well I have very sensitive skin as well, I use olay blemish face wash. It not to expensive about 6 dallors a tube. Olay has a line of all kinds of face products that I use everyday. When i was younger I tried oxy and stuff and it burned me so bad, and my whole face would stay red for days and hurt to even touch it. Alot of harsh facial stuff did that to me for ance. I been using olay for as long as I can remember and it has never done that. The only other thing I could really suggest is proactive solution and their face line. I have not tried the product myself but have had friends who have used it and loved it. Its suppose to be ok on highly senative skin too. I here that proactive does wonders for just about anyone, but I have never tried it first hand. I hope this helps let me know what you think.....
Everything takes place onedayatatime
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im a b cup but somehow my chest is too wide and i dont have cleavage while some other people do
would a push up bra really help? if so, is victorias secret too overrated? where is the best place to get a push up bra? (link)
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ADVICE
Well I am a b cup as well. I have brought and purchased push up bras from all over. You can get them almost anywhere. Walmark, kmart, victorias secrect, Sears, Jcpenny's, dillards, just about any clothing store you can think of. But I have the same problem as you. The push up bra really does help to a point. As far as wanting the nice cleave though, if your like me it does not really work to do that like we would like it too. So if you do purchase one get a push up bra that is also padded. Water bra's are also nice and look very natural. I think that would work for this situation pretty well. Also you dont have too spend a fortune at overrated stores to get the same effect.. I hope this helps let me know what you think .....
Take it ondayatatime
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Ever since we broke up (I dumped him) my ex boyfriend has been behaving rather badly. He’s been sleeping around and alienating his friends, and they keep coming to me asking me to talk to him.
I don’t really want to do that. I talked to him for ages while we dating about the way he treated his friends, about his depression and his bad habits. He fooled around before we were dating a lot. I’m not surprised he is doing the same things now… It’s not like it’s my fault he is this way: He was always that way. I feel like his friends just didn’t notice it as much when he was with me because I was dealing with most of by myself and without dragging them into it. But I warned them, asked them for help and they always ignored me.
I’m ticked off at them all now, and I really don’t want this guy in my life very much right now. I still care too much for him to be able to handle his stupid behavior calmly and I am NOT getting back together with him. Ever. His lousy behavior after the break up has only made me more certain that it was a bad match. I’ve asked his friends to stop telling me all the gory details, but they seem convinced that I’m the only one that can ‘help’ him. If I couldn’t help him when we were together, how on earth am I supposed to do it now? Am I a horrible person for not wanted to get involved in this anymore? (link)
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ADVICE
You are not a horriable person for feeling this way at all. If those same friends of his where not there when you asked for there help, and you where ignored seems a bit off scale. People demand alot out of someone when they are not willing to deal with anything themselves directly. Sounds to me like these friends of his dont want or never wanted the responibility of having to pick the pieces up when something went wrong. Your X boyfriend does sound very depressive, it also seems as if he is doing things intentionally to get your attention. when that seems to fail seems like his friends are being sent in to basically demand it for him. Whe a person is very depressive and you had been with him for awhile, he feels a closeness to you, that is now gone too. It will add to his down sprial fast. Even though he was still kindof that way when you guys where together he will do bolder things now just to make sure he is getting you to notice. Weather it be something you hear about from others, his friends directly, on so on. A person such as him needs some councling or some one professional to talk to before he does somethig very drastic. I know you tried and things did not change when you where with him, and I believe that if you ever did feel the need to speak with him, I would tell him he needs professional or some counceling to help him through this. If his depression is this bad and has been for some time he may need to be on medication sometimes thats the only thing that will help. But as far as you feeling bad, you should never feel bad. You did the right thing and he needs help you can not give to him now or even then. So if you do care about him, I would either tell his friends to give him a message for you (about what I suggested) I do think in this situation though he might only be willing to seek help if you where the one who suggested it. So I hope this helps, and I understand feeling torn about what to do. Let me know what you think...
Go slow and think onedayatatime
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so just wondering, do guys like it shaved all off down there or a little bit or trimmed???? (link)
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ADVICE
Well all guys are different, some do some don't, it really depends on the guy your with. I would say do what ever you normally do. And when your with a partner and have a relationship with a guy just ask. Most guys are pretty forthcomming with what they perfer or like.. I hope this helps let me know what you think...
Taking things onedayatatime
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I have this friend who never leaves me alone. We went on vacation together over the summer and her family is pretty awesome. Well anyways its months later and she doesn't get the idea i need space. I don't want to be mean and tell her off because that would seem like i'm a complete bitch and was using her to go on a vacation.
Most of my friends can't stand her and shes very full of herself and likes to point out flaws on me sometimes. It gets annoying, she never stops talking about the same thing over and over. Lately she hasn't stopped talking about drugs and getting high which has gotten on my nerves. I tell her to shut up and i don't care about that and it doesn't interest me. But she doesn't stop.
Recently she tried to set me up with this guy friend of hers whose in 8th grade and i'm in 11th and i dunno if i should take that offensively or not.
She has also been a bother with lunch and everyone wants me to make her leave our table because she wasn't there the first week of school and now there isn't enough space for the orignal ones of us who sat there. I recently found out she is bi, i am too but shes really clingy doesn't leave me alone and happens to be everywhere i am and like pays attention to every detail about me which gets kinda creepy. Anyways yeah i dunno what to do without seeming like a bitch or making a huge scene or loss of our friendship. Any ideas? (link)
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ADVICE
Well you could find things to keep you busy, always seem like your in a rush to be somewhere or do something. But that will not continue to work. I think I would be nice and just tell her that she needs to give you some breathing room, and she is creeping you out a little. Tell her you mean no offence to her but you just need a little less you and her time. I would also mention that it makes your head hurt hearing the same information repeated over and over. Nothing wrong with making an obvious observation, I am sure others are aware of. If this does not help and she does not get a clue like some people. You will have to be more assertive in your actions. In other words if she talks and talks and talks and follows you, just turn to her and tell her to stop it knock it off. Tell her that you have expressed how you feel, and if she cant respect what you have asked of her, then she will just have to back off for awhile. Friendship is a two way street you dont have to be totally mean but I would be more assertive with her, and in your actions. I hope this helps, let me know what you think.......
Stop take a deep breath and remember to take it onedayatatime
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ok so theres my best friend, we'll call her A. A was friends with another girl, B. were all seniors in high school now. so A & B were really good friends up until last year, B started hanging out with the popular party girls and started spending all her time sneaking out, drinking nonstop, and gettin herself into situations with guys and basically went from a good girl to a party girl whore. she did a complete 180, basically. so A told B that she hated the way she had changed and wouldnt be friends with her when she was like that. so they werent friends. This year, B stopped hanging out with those girls for the most part and came back to reality and stopped all the excessive partying, so A and B are friends again. well at the end of last year, my best friend A got really heavy into partying. all summer she'd go to parties almost every night, and couldnt wait to get high and drunk and fool around with random guys she'd sometimes barely know. she basically became the person that B was who she said she didnt like. she has laid off the weed, i guess, but the other night her and two other girls went off and got high off a large amount of pills, and all she talks about these days is going and getting drunk and where the next party is. everything is liquor liquor liquor. she's invited me to go to parties with her, which it usually ends up that im not able to because of work or something, but i wouldnt mind going every once in a while, but i do not want to be in the wild crazy party all the time livin off alcohol and gettin high kinda scene. im to the point where i almost want to do to her what she did to B, tell her that i hate the way she is now and dont wanna associate with her if shes gonna have partying on the brain 24/7. the thing is though is that i dont want to do that. i love her to death, we've been good friends for going on 4 years, and shes an amazing person. we have so many good times and shes fun to be around and has been there for me when i need her. i just hate that she cant go a day without talking about getting drunk or high, and thats basically all she does besides go to school and sleep. shes even driven drunk and other stupid stuff like that. shes a model, a straight A student, and so much fun, and i hate what shes doing to herself, but i know her, and there would basically be no talking her out of this lifestyle, but i dont wanna lose one of my best friends. what's a girl to do? (link)
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ADVICE
Well I do have alot of experiance on this one. I to had a really best friend who I was friends with for over 20 years. We where like sisters, I loved her to death, and still care for her to this day. The thing is when her life started to affect my life in a negative way, I had to do the only thing I could and cut her out of my life. I still care for her, but she did not change. When you love a person, sometimes the best thing to do is walk away. I say this because if your friend cant get it under control and she is not willing to listen to reason there is not much you can do. So this is your question how long will you let her actions affect your life? We cant make people change no matter how much we would like them to. Believe me I have waited prayed cried, and had my heart riped out. The thing was over many years of this from the same friend, I could not take it anymore. So if in 20 years with my friend who did not change< I really would not like to see you suffer like I have watching someone you love self destruck right in front of you. Its an extremely hard thing to do, to not be around someone you care for so much, but sometimes you have to do it. Not only for yourself but for them as well. I wish I had a better answer to give for this one but I am being totally honest with you on this one. I hope your situation will have a better outcome than mine did, but it just so similar to everything I have gone through. So as a last plee to your friend I would tell her, I love you but I will have to cut you out of my life for good if you cant stop. If she is not willing to change after that, then I am sorry you are fighting a lost cause.. And one last thing, with my friend it was a repeated pattern for years, we would hang out for a year or two she would start it all over again then there would be periods of six months, nine months so on I would not talk to her. My friend would sware she had changed and everytime I let her back into my life it all started all over. So over two years ago I cut her off completely and we will never be friends again. I know how harsh that sounds, but I do still care about her and think of her and I think I always will. That is so not comforting I know, but I thought you should know.. Keep in touch let me know what you think ok..
It only takes onedayatatime
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ok i no this probably sounds really stupid n i know circumcision is like cutting the foreskin off n stuff but why do they do it? what difference does it make? do most guys have it? thanx any advice is appreciated! ALOT!!!!! (link)
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ADVICE
Circumcision is a preference ususally at the discretion of the parents. Some religons choose to have this done. Having foreskin or not having foreskin is fine. When you do have foreskin it is said to be better sexually there are more nerves and most guys state there is more sensation than when you do not have foreskin. Most people are far as parents go pick to have a circumcision done do to risk of infection. Say the father of a child was circumcised usually the child will be to, this is usually how it works. If the father is uncircumcised they may not circuncise their child. Its all about choice and knowledge. If a parent feels uncomforable or is worried about infection or proper care, they may just want to have a boy circumcised for that reason alone. But if its something common in the family like being uncircumcised all those guys in those familes and so on will usually reamin that way. So it will vary will each family always. So there are many guys circumsised as well as uncircumcised. I hope this helps you out, let me know....
Always keep in mind onedayatatime
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ok i have these bage color dickies n i dnt know what 2 wear with them! idk wat color tank tops n shirts 2 go with! (link)
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ADVICE
Solid color shirts like black, white, dark green, red all look good with bage color dickies. If your thin and can pull off half shirts they look really cute with bage color dickies. I could not pull off that look with the half shirt though but it does look cute :) I hope this helps ya some, I dont myself think that pattern or striped shirts really look quite right with bage color dickies buts that just my opinion I do like the solid colors best with bage dickies. Good luck sure you will look great let me know what you think.....
thinking about everything onedayatatime
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well i get into these terrible rages where i just want to do violent things (such as break something, hurt myself, verbally hurt someone else) and i dont know how to cope with them. i absolutely HATE when im like that but its really hard to calm down unless i sleep and thats not an option. and these moods/rages happen kinda often as of lately because of my parents so please help. is there a disease/mental diorder that i might have??? and please what are some ways to deal with this? thank you soo much! i will rate! (link)
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ADVICE
I was exactly like you in every way when I was younger, you described it to the tee. I also thought at one time was this a condidtion, or something mentally wrong with me! It was neither one of these things. It was the extreem stress that I felt living at home. My parents gave me no space, I had no unwind time, no privacy no outlet that was not messed with or taken away. It was the only way to vent and the longer I held all that stress in the bigger the blow up. I would get so angry my whole body would shake uncontrolably. I felt I was on the verge of a nervous break down. Once I found a way to leave home, it stopped. I still got angry at times, but never the same way I did when I lived at home. Overtime I have mellowed out alot. I have control over my anger and never have gotten as mad as I did when I lived at home. I had many reasons that I was angry at my parents, and when I tried to talk with them it fell on def ears. So emotionally I became torn up inside. I would tolerate as much as I could for as long as I could, until it became unbarable and I would have the same reaction that you just described. Once you move get out of the house, you will slowly begin to see change. If after some time you find this does not help or fix the situation, I would really recommend talking to a professional to work out unresolved isses. I hope this helps and I wanted you to know that you are not the only one who is like this. Lets me know if this helps at all, things did get better for me so in my opinion I think yours will too... Keep in touch let me know how your doing ....
Take a deep breath and remember take it onedayatatime
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My roommate and I just got a girl snake. She's so cute! She's merely 7 inches, so tiny! She's very clumsy, has a pointy nose, and likes to dig. We need a very very creative name for her, but we can't come up with anything! Any ideas? (link)
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ADVICE
Thats really cool you have a snake, I once had a jungle carpet python I named it TAO. I usually find it easier to name a pet once I have had them for a little while. Most animals have their own personalities but its very difficult to read a snake.
clueless (cause you said she is clumsy)
striker (cause thats what snakes can do)
snar (dont know was just thinking of the
pointy nose thing)
These might no help that much but I get an A for effort right LOL
Let me know what you name her very curious,good luck.....
Taking it onedayatatime
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Wow. So I'm a freshman and I'm going to homecoming saturday. and I honestly feel completly screwed. I can NOT dance. And don't say I don't have to. I WANT TO! I told all these guys i'd dance with them. As in, grind. I don't know what to do. Pleaseee help. Please. (link)
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ADVICE
If you want to feel more secure about dancing before you go, practice practice practice. You can watch some dance moves or just get a feel for the beat of the music. If you have to stand in front of a mirror and watch yourself. The best tips for dancing is to not be stiff. Keep your motions loose and fluent. Try to not be nervous and stiff, dont make movements seemed forced in any way. Dont worry about looking like a professional dancer, just practice and have fun in front of the mirror before the dance. As far as slow dancing, do you have any female friends, or a guy friend that would help you out with that before the dance? If not its not to big of a deal, keep your eyes on him, move in the direction that he moves you. Dont worry about stepping on feet I think I still do that. Slow dancing is not that bad, my first dance with a guy, I had never slow danced before in my life, it came to me fairly quickly. I did step on his feet but he thought it was cute. He was also thrilled that he was my first real slow dance. It will be a good memmory just dont stress over wanting to be perfert or great at it. Have you seen some people dance? They look like they are having seizers LOL So no worries K you will do great!!!! I hope this helped have alot of fun and let me know what happens....
onedayatatime
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