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Razhie. Advicenators Member Since: June 13, 2005. Answers: 5077. Visitors: 211514.
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The Question
I'm 18; my parents got divorced when I was 11, and I started having unsupervised visits to my dad's apartment when I was 13. I worry about my father - he takes his drugs and sees his psychologist and doctor, but the fact remains that he has bipolar disorder and very high blood pressure, and he refuses to try and help himself. He lives in a tiny, roach-infested apartment that smells horrendous, and he never cleans it. He eats red meat all the time, and never eats fresh vegetables. I've tried to talk to him about his diet and his living conditions many times, but he'll never listen, and if I ever try to help clean up the apartment he stops me, saying that there's no need for me to spend our limited time together doing chores. . . but our time together usually consists of watching TV, because he never goes anywhere. Do you have any idea how I can get through to him?
The Answer
He's your dad, and you’re his child and you always will be. You can't change him and you can't fix him.
You probably can’t even help him. He has been living this way for so long, he would have to want to change, and he obviously doesn’t.
The only think you can do, is change yourself.
So, let’s talk about what you can do to make YOU feel better about this situation:
Think of ways you can enjoy your time with your Dad more.
This might take some money on your part and some firm words, but you can make it happen.
Bring a board game or cards, invite him out to a movie or a diner, or bring groceries to cook for him. Let him know FIRMLY that these activities are your choice, not something you feel is a chore, but things you WANT to do WITH him. He might argue with chores, but he can't argue if you are firm about how you want use your time together.
Don’t make it your job to take care of him. Make it your job to enjoy your time with him by making the situation more pleasant for you.
You might also try laying down some ground rules now that you are old enough to do so.
If you are spending the night at his place it is perfectly fair to let him know that there is a basic standard that must be met or you simply can’t stay.
Pick really simple things like, the bathroom must be cleaned once a month and the garbage must be taken out before you arrive, or else you will not be able to stay with him.
If he makes an effort, be forgiving, but if he doesn’t even try to meet your very basic standards, enjoy a short visit with him, and then call for a ride or cab to take you home.
Don’t make this about saving him. Make it about clearly stating what you can, and can’t tolerate.
His life will probably never be what you would wish for him, but you can make your relationship and your life better by being proactive and firm about how you want to spend your time with him, and what you are willing to live with.
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The Question
what is the emancipation law for Pennsylvania. me & my mom do not get along at all. we fight constantly and i think it's time to get away. i work part time and i'm going to be in junior in august. i'm 16 years old. if anyone has any information about it or how to go about doing it, please let me know. thanks.
The Answer
In order to be emancipated in any state, you must prove two things.
One, that you need to be protected legally from your mothers choices as your guardian. That means your mother must be abusing or neglecting you, behaving illegally, or denying you medical treatments you feel you need. It must be your best interest to not be under her care and guardianship.
Two, Emancipation is different from loosing custody (which is what should happen when a parent is that irresponsible) because what emancipation means is that you are legally considered an adult. You still can't drink or drive ;) but you can sign contracts like leases, you can be sued ectra. So, the second criteria for emancipation is that you would be able to support yourself as an independent adult after being emancipated. That means you need to know where and how you are living, where you money will be coming from, and you need to know how you will continue your education. Many states will require that you have already been living on your own and managing your own money for several months PRIOR to filing for emancipation.
Most courts wont even bother with your emancipation case if you plan is to drop out of school.
Emancipation is not for serious personality conflicts. It’s a way for older teens that are making the transition out of their parent’s home to escape abuse without entering the foster care system. Very, very, very few emancipation cases are won.
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The Question
Ok so,heres the problem at first my brother likes my boyfriend the problem is..?!in School..all my classmates were tellin' rumors about my boyfriend that were together...cuz like we were keepin it on the down low...They found it out!and all our teachers like knew about it,...and my brother told me whatever you guys are doin you gotta stop it now!so he said if i ever go out, I should have a shaperown who he can trust.....And I dont know what to do...?
The Answer
Gently tell your brother that you know that he cares for you, but he is your brother, not your parent, and he doesn't make the rules.
He doesn't get to tell you who you can see and how. If you are a teen who lives with your parents, they sure as hell do! But your bother doesn't.
Sit and down and tell him that you know he cares, but he needs to butt out.
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The Question
I am a very gentle person, but not when I'm with my family...they tend to get the worst of me. Sometimes they'll do things that are obnoxious and rude. I have tried to hold my tongue, but it is so hard. Why am I trying to correct their behavior...How can I stop? I love them too much to keep putting them down!
The Answer
Why wouldn't you want to kindly and respectfully let the people you love know that you don't particularly like their behavior?
Of course you shouldn't be putting them down. But accepting and loving someone doesn't mean lying to them. Be honest, in a gentle and respectful way, about what you feel is rude.
You might choose to bite your tongue in the heat of the moment so that you don't come off snarky or rude yourself, but if something they do really bothers you, bring it up at a calm time and let them know. You don’t even need to ask them to change if you don’t want too! But do yourself, and them, a favor by letting them know what they do that you perceive as rude.
So make that a new rule for yourself!
When someone does something you think it rude, make a mental note of it, or even write it down! If, later on when you look at the note, it still seems like something you want to talk to them about, then do so.
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The Question
I am having such a hard time keeping myself motivated to study. I have a huge exam (LSAT) coming up in a little over two months- it seems like a long time, but time passes quickly.
To add, I have no problems concentrating or anything- aka, I do not have ADD or some other learning disability. I just find it hard to stick to a schedule and keep myself motivated for a number of reasons: a) I have never had to prepare for an exam for months on end, and b) the material is getting old and it's pretty much repetition.
I know I will need to prepare intensively, but it's hard for me to set a schedule and stick with it. I can study, then I get completely bored, and before I know it, the day is almost done.
Any ideas on good time management skills? And how to keep motivated to study for such an intense exam?
The Answer
Have you taken some practice exams?
Are you taking a prep course?
If you answered no to either of those questions, get your butt out there and do those things.
You are absolutely right that sitting on your butt and studying the same material over and over again is repetitious and boring. It is exactly that! That is why you have to alter you approach to the material to keep it fresh.
Take a prep course, so that you are listening to the material in new ways and being exposed to different wordings of it, rather then reading the same sentence over and over again.
Take a practice exam to help gauge how you are doing. If you completely fail it, that will probably motivate you to work harder! If you ace it, then you know that you can probably put less effort into studying in the next few months and just do enough to stay on top of it.
One of the best ways to study for these kinds of exhaustive exams is also to make a study group where you each take turns TEACHING a particular part or subject on the exam or making flashcards and other study aids for eachother. Again, it’s about keeping the material fresh and presenting it in a different way, but it’s also about hearing what another person felt what important from the material and what key points they took away from it.
Find a way to change your approach to studying and it will get easier.
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The Question
Okay, well i was just watching Deja Vu, and in the movie a guy said "In a sence, we're always looking in the past, because it takes time for light to reach the eye." Well i wanted to know, what kind of science studies that kind of thought? sorry if that sounds confusing. I also wanted to know;; if you have any other cool kind of statements that make you think like that? that make you say "hmm. never thought of that" haha, just a random questionn i had to ask. thanks for any advice about thisss!
The Answer
The science of light is physics.
The science of what happens once that light hits the eye is shared by biology, specifically optometry and optics, and more importantly in my view, neurology, the study of how the brain works.
The idea that because light takes time to reach the eye we always looking at the past, although a scientific and true statement, is really discussing more the philosophy of perception then it is discussing objective reality. At least that is my opinion on that statement.
To read some interesting things about how the brain works and the how we perceive things pick up Blink! by Malcolm Gladwell. It’s a popular book you should be able to get at any bookstore about the workings of our unconscious mind. If you want something more scientific, but also intriguing, pick up Descartes Error, which addresses how emotions exist in our brain and touches on some of the philosophy of them.
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The Question
so im 18 and i work at staples... lately ive been a little unsatisfied by their system. I hate how they just make the scheduale without consulting any of us in advance about days we prefer or can work. They make the scheduales 2 weeks in advance when i dont even know yet if i can work and its summer so a lot of times my mom will randomly be like oh you cant work that day we have a doctor appt or we have to go do this or something and a lot of times its too late to change the day yoiu work. This really frustrates me and i told them a million times i cant work fridays and saturdays and they always put me on fridays and saturdays and im sick of having to go up to them every week to talk about my scheduale.. im considering quitting because also the managers treat all of us poorly... any advice??
The Answer
Find a job that is a better fit for you.
It is perfectly normal for a schedule to be set two weeks in advance. It's also very, very normal for employees to be expected to work some weekends, especially if they have low seniority.
Those things can be tough to deal with, especially when you are teen and have family obligations that you aren't in complete control of.
You aren’t getting what you need from this job, and frankly, they aren’t getting what they need from you if you are always having to change your schedule and shuffling things around.
So quit. Find a job where they are more understanding and flexible. You should be up front about when you can and can’t work, and how many hours you are looking for each week.
It’s good to have a bad job as a teen! It helps you learn how to balance and communicate with your employer. It also helps you to recognize when it’s time to just call it quits. Now is a good time. Remember what I said about weekends and scheduling before and talk to your mom about what you need from her in order to arrange your work time and family time, then take your new skills and find someplace else to work.
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The Question
Anybody know anything about tarot.
Like I would really appreciate people that have done it with the real cards.
Me and my friend bought some cards a few days ago and did it and everything about it was quite freaky.
Like how you hands would stop directly over them when your eyes were closed. and we did this one twice and it came out the same exact results.
Idk, im just kinda freaked out.
I wanna know anybody expirences..
please and thank you.
you can ask me questions if you are confused or anything like that...
The Answer
The Tarot, as a tool for meditation or self reflection, is interesting.
I practiced Tarot reading among some other things for several years a spiritual practice, these days I read them for fun because I can sometimes find them useful to guide my own self-reflections.
As a tool for divination or communicating with spirits... well frankly, I don't believe in divination and I don’t put much stock in ritualized forms of trying to communicate with spirits. I believe in the power of the human mind.
The brain is a truly amazing thing that is always working hard for us, even when we aren't aware of it. Believing in something can be make you feel better when you are sick, or it can make you sick when you are healthy. Being ashamed can make you vomit, being afraid can make you faint, and believing that tarot cards hold supernatural powers can make your hand hover over the same card more then once, among other things.
Believing that something is real can make it real to you. But ‘real to you’ isn’t necessarily reality.
Here is a good example of the principals that are at play in our brain when we do something like use tarot cards or an ouija board.
There was an experiment done at a university where people were given two decks of cards, a red deck and a blue one. Each card either gave points, or took points away. The red deck was rigged to take points away more often then to give them, and the blue deck was rigged to give more points then it took away. The doctors wanted to see how long it would take for people to figure this out. It took about 80 cards for people to be able to SAY that the blue deck was better, but after only 10 cards, most people started to favor the blue deck and avoid the red.
So you see the brain had already figured out what was happening so the hand is reaching for the better deck without the person knowing why yet.
Your unconscious mind is ALWAYS working, and your unconscious is SMART. Even when you aren’t aware of it, it’s figuring things out and trying to explain them. Sometimes those explanations are wrong. For instance, I would say that the explanation that Tarot cards allow you to communicate with spirits or tell the future, is a wrong explanation for what is actually happening: Your brain is using the cards as a guide to express things it already knows or believes in.
Don't worry yourself, and don't put too much stock in cards, or runes or fortune telling of any kind. They have little value beyond a bit of entertainment.
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The Question
I know it's long but please read... I need advice.
Hi I'm 17 f, and I've been talking to this boy for about 2 months out, and at the beginning he said he had a girlfriend and he wanted to talk to me as a friend but as time went on, of course we started liking each other. And now he tells me I'm the girl of dreams but like he doesnt know what to do because he has a girlfriend and he wrote me this really sweet love poem and he always tells me he loves me and he seems so serious but I can't tell. Then like I went to dinner with him for my birthday and he paid for my food and even got me the cheesecake he knew I liked and he kept kissing me on the cheek the whole night and hugging me and everything, he even told me he loved me in real life. But the thing is, I dont understand why he doesn't break up with his gf if he likes me so much? Am I supposed to just wait around or what? And I always try to talk about it with him but he always tries to change the subject and says he doesn't care about her and stuff. We talk on the phone like every night and he ALWAYS calls me, I never call him, but I'm getting so attached and really wanna be with him but what should I do?
The Answer
Stop taking his calls.
You aren't stuck between him and his girlfriend.
You are letting him use you to cheat on his girlfriend.
You are doing exactly what he wants you to do. You are obessing over him and waiting for him. He gets to have you, and his girlfriend. He doesn't have to deal with the unpleasant and stressful parts of what he is doing. You, and his girlfriend, are the ones who get to feel worried and stressed out.
His behavoir is selfish and scummy.
There is no way to make his behavoir okay. There is no way to make it respectful or loving. It's just plain wrong.
Stop taking his calls. Tell him to get his act togeather if he is really interested in having something with you.
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The Question
14/male
my parents gave me a curfew of 9:30 becouse she dosint like we out when shes asleep (shes hella fuckin old) how do i convince her to to give me an apropreate curfew thz is beging to effect my Social life my freinds r starting to call me momas boy and when its 9:30 my freinds will say hay james its time to go suck ur moms tits plz help i need a convincing agument
The Answer
Sounds like what you really need is better friends.
Try offering to call your mom at 9:30 before she goes to bed and let her know where you are at and when you'll be back.
Frankly, you are fourteen years old so a nine-thirty curfew on school nights makes total sense to me. Try to make your negotiation about a special event. Bring it up in advance about a Friday or Saturday night you are planning to be out doing something with friends. Offer to call and let her know what is going on at 9:30pm and see if she will warm up the idea gradually.
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The Question
so recently my boyfriend fingered me its the only thing possible i can think of that can cause this.. i dont know if its a uti but when i urine it hurts on the last few drops of pee not during urination, is this a uti? if it is are there ways i can cure it on my own... i heard cranberry juice...my family isnt really into medicines and stuff usually i use homeopathic things
The Answer
Burning at the end of unrination is how a UTI begins, then it gets worse and worse until the pain is constant even when you aren't urinating at all.
Cranberry juice can reduce the pain, but it DOES NOT cure a UTI. A UTI is a bacterial infection, and needs to be treated by perscription medication.
Leaving a UTI untreated could cause the infection to spread to your bladder and kidneys and that will land you in the hospital in rather serious condition.
A UTI starts out simple enough, but gets worse really fast. Start guzzeling the cranberry juice now to reduce the pain but realize for the actual cure, you'll need to a doctor.
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The Question
hi , guys !
some of my friends recomend a website to me : www.dress08.com . I browsed this website , they are a wholesaler for famous brand fashion designs ,A&F , Armani,Ed hardy ,Hollister and so on .I like their items , they are fantastic ,the most important thing is their prices are attacted to me ,for whosale prices!
Now i want to buy some dresses from them ,wondering if this online shop is really good ? Please give me some useful advices!
Thank you !!!
The Answer
Lots of online retailers are reliable and honest, HOWEVER, the site you linked too, is a scam.
Here is how I know:
They only accept payment by wire transfer. They don't use paypal, or any major credit card.
Wire transfer services like Western Union are NOT for purchasing goods. If you purchase something and it never arrives, Western Union will shrug its shoulders and say 'Sorry, it's not our business who you send money too or why.'
Major credit cards or paypal would investigate and refuse to do business with an unreliable seller.
Honest sellers NEVER use wire transfers. Thieves do.
Any excuse you hear about paypal not being legal in china or some similar shit is a boldfaced lie and part of a scam.
If you give them your money, you will never see it or any of those dresses. It's a scam, plain and simple.
A PERSONAL NOTE: I highly doubt you are every going to read this sooooo... I know a sales pitch when I see one. I think it is absolutely disgusting that you are so blatantly, and so badly, trying to use this site to advertise your scam. Preying on the retail inexperience of teenagers is scummy. Go curl up under a rock.
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The Question
well i was just wondering how like everyone says that if you don't fight or have alot of bad times then its not a real relationship? but like i really like this guy, we're not technically dating but we both really like each other and i think he's gonna ask me out soon the next time we hang out, but we don't fight at all and we have so much fun together but we've never been in a fight yet. so my question is, is that normal? does it mean our relationship won't last because its not real? i kinda want a fight to come though because i want to see if he will still stay with me but i dont wanna like pick a fight, what should i do? thankss
16/f
The Answer
First things first: You aren't in a relationship yet. Don't waste your time worrying about the health of a relationship that hasn't even started yet!
The first little while is called the 'honeymoon period'. People rarely fight during that early time, they are too into eachother, just a child is into a new toy.
In six months, if you guys never disagree, then you have a problem. You don't have to 'fight' to have a healthy relationship, but you SHOULD disagree sometimes. A couple that never disagrees, doesn't really care about eachother enough to fight OR one of the members doesn't respect themself enough to voice thier opinion.
That is the real standard. You don't have to have a full on fight, but NOBODY agrees with someone else all the time unless they are in an unhealthy relationship.
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The Question
I am thinking about a job change, I am currently working at an insurance broker, making around $62,000 I have been here for 9 years, I do not have health ins or a retirement no cost of living raise or anything I look ahead 5 years from now and see I am in the same spot mabe making $65,000 Maybe the boss I work for is very very cheap, he droped my xmas bonus by $300 last year so he could give his son the same as me he has only been her 1 year. I am 42 years old and a single mom a son 15 daugther 7, I do have a license for what I do. The company I am thinking about moving to is similar, they do Health Insurance I would have to get another license which is good but it is sales, they pay you as you write policies, if you write 1 you get paid the very next week they have a retirement that is funded by them and you are fully vested in 10 years the name of the company is Cornerstone America, the person I did the interview with made $90,000 last year, I am thinking well the least I could do is make what I am making but if I wanted to make more I could please let me know what you think.
Thanks Cindy
The Answer
You should probably not take this job.
A quick google search of 'Cornerstone America' will show you that many people felt they were scammed and lied too about this job. It sounds fanastic in print, but the truth that is a a bit like those informercials on TV in the sense that 'Results May Vary.'
Google it yourself, and read what people have had to say about this company. I think that will open your eyes to thier deceptive practices best.
By all means, look for another job. It sounds like you are undervalued at your current one and the manager is a bit shaddy. Just remember that when something looks too good to be true, it probably is.
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The Question
Hi, I am hoping to start school in 2009 but am not financially stable to go to school and therefor need some sort of loan. I was thinking of getting a line of credit from a bank but someone told me that in ontario you can go on welfare for school. And they pay for the studies for you, or atleast help you pay for it. I would like to know if anyone knows any information about this and if this is true.
The Answer
I am going to assume you are talking about going to college or university.
Well, no, it's nothing like what you are thinking. You cannot 'go on welfare' and pay for your studies. Social Security payments in Canada are insufficiant to pay for a university education.
You CAN apply for a special goverment loan called the OSAP (Ontario Student Assitance Program). These loans are special because they don't gain any interest untill after you graduate. You also aren't expected to pay them back in any way until after you are finished school (or if you drop out, of course).
To recieve an OSAP loan, you must be accepted to an accridited program and be a Canadian citizen who has lived in Ontario for at least a year.
You can learn more by following this link: https://osap.gov.on.ca/eng/not_secure/App_elig_req_123.htm
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The Question
Ok im cheatin on my boyfriend but i feel reeeeeeeeeeeeali sad bout it.....but i REALLI like dis other guy n i couldnt break up wit my bf cus i love him sooo much 2 n i dont wanna hurt him.How can i break it to my bf??
The Answer
Accept reality.
The reality is you ARE going to hurt him. You betrayed him and lied to him, that hurts.
The reality is you cannot have both of them.
Make up your mind. If you want to be with your boyfriend and you can be loyal to him, then apologize and beg him to stay with you. If you want to fool around with the other guy, accept that that will probably mean you relationship is over.
Just tell him honestly and give him the complete truth.
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The Question
I like this guy, it's my boyfriends best friend... kind of bad I know. This guy really isn't what most would consider attractive hes a real big guy but i love his personality he's really cool.. i have noticed this more and more since my boyfriend treats me like crap. I don't think this guy would do that to his friend though.. what should I do about this...? I mean me and this guy hang out sometimes.. should I tell him wussup
The Answer
If your boyfriend treats you like crap, dump him. Don't cheat. Dont' even talk about cheating. That would make you a notsonice person.
If you want to let your boyfriends best friend know about your feelings, tell him after you've broken up with his friend. That way, it's not cheating AND you can sure that it's not just a rebound either. Jumping from one relationship into another is a good way to get stuck with someone who might be a bit better then your ex, but still isn't exactly what you want for yourself.
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The Question
sry i didnt know under what category to put this :S
and i know this is a weird question but i've been wondering.
but i wa sjust wondering that when a pretty girl walks down the street the guys in the cars look right? ok so when I personally walk down the street they DO look at me as well. pretty much every single one. but then there is the beeping thing. do they beep at girls who are good looking or at girls who look like they're ready to do stuff and look kinda slutty.
cos i actually thought they would NOT beep at girls who look extreamly good and confident and like they have 'high standarts' if you know what i mean.
cos as i said they do look at me but i dont get beeped at often. all in all i only got beeped at 5 times or smth. [in about a year :S]
and i guess i look more like a girl who wouldnt exactly be happy about getting beeped at.
sorry i dont wanna offend you and say that you look slutty if you get beeped at though. [but think about it, do you wear minnie skirts etc? that doesnt mean youre slutty but you show SKIN]
but is it true that they're more likely to beep at a slutty girl then a confident/pretty looking girl cos they might have more respect?
sorry this might be the weirdest question ever i realise that myself so dont tell me I have issues :S
thank youu xxx
The Answer
I've got to say, I think it has far more to do with the guys then it has to do with the girl.
I've seen honking at thirteen year olds, at girls dressed in sweatpants and girls dressed in miniskirts. The only general rule I can come up with is that guys engage in this behavior when they are feeling powerful, especially when there are two or more of them in the car.
So I doubt that girls who look more confident can avoid it. The guys feel confident because they are in a group, and are less likely to be intimidated.
I used to try and figure out what would help me avoid honking, commands from strange men to ‘Smile’, or comments like ‘You’re a sexy lady’ on the streets (nothing like a bit of objectification first thing in the morning), but all I have managed to learn is that is doesn’t matter what I wear or how I walk or what I’m saying. By virtue of being a reasonably attractive young female, especially if I am walking alone, I just have to deal with these rude, boorish and sometimes frightening comments.
Maybe the girls who dress for the attention get the comments more, but I know sheer confidence won’t dissuade them and I doubt the even the most beautiful girls can rely on intimation to avoid it either.
It just has nothing to do with the woman. That is why it isn't really a compliment. It’s all about the crap going on in the guy’s head. Unless they see as you as totally sexless, every young woman will have the pleasure of dealing with this sometimes.
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The Question
Okay, why do guys ALWAYS freak out when they hear their girlfriend ask them this question: "Do you love me?" I don't see what the big issue is. It doesn't mean the end of our relationship, does it?
The Answer
Love should be freely given. It is uncomfortable to have your deepest feelings called into question and checked up on.
Love can also come with a lot of expectations. Anyone is uncomfortable saying something when they aren’t sure exactly what they are getting themselves into, and with love, you never can be sure.
It would also make you think the person who asked you, is a bit needy and manipulative. It might also make them feel distrusted.
I don't think it is just guys either. If a guy I'd be dating for a while turned to me and said "Do you love me?" I'd certainly be a bit annoyed with him. He either just demanded that I tell him I do, or put me in the awkward position of telling him I don't. It’s like a teacher demanding an answer to a question when you weren’t paying any attention… only way worse. It's not a very nice position to put a person in.
Of course, it's different for a couple who have said those three words to each other before, but even then, I wouldn't say 'Do you love me?’ That really does sound needy and demanding. Instead I'd let my partner know that I like hearing them say that and I'd like to hear it more.
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The Question
why is everyone so in love with the jonas brothers?
personally i dont like them, and if i express my opinion everyone yells at me and says "how can you hate them you don't know them" and my retort is "how can you love them you dont know them either". but anyways im so sick of being ridiculed for not liking them, and i just want to know what the big deal with them is?
The Answer
Its the same big deal there was with the New Kids on The Block, and Backstreet Boys and NSync... I know I'm talking ancient history as far as pop culture is concerned, but there it is.
They are a well marketed and well timed product for a demographic that has a shit load of expendable income and an infinate supply of ranging horomones.
The good news is that in a few years your friends will have moved on to obessing about real people, instead of heavily fictionalized media personalities. The bad news is, every generation has thier 'Jonas Brothers', be them the Monkeys, the New Kids or the Backstreet Boys... Until boy bands are not attractive to adolecents and young teens, they will continue to exist.
What you need to do, is stop taking it personally!
If someone told you that broccolli was awesome and you said 'No, I don't like broccolli at all.' would you bother getting into a big argument about it? No, of course not. You'd just agree to have different tastes. IT's the same thing with bands. Insteed of attacking thier precious little boy band, shrug your shoulders and say 'Nope. Don't really like 'em at all.' If the person you are talking too takes that personally, remind that that it is just a matter of taste, because that is all it really is.
People tease you because they are trying to defend thier fandom, if you stop being so critical, most of the ridiculing will stop.
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