about

My name is Teza.. short for Tereza. I was born in Croatia and I speak more than one language. I'm 22 years old & I completed 2 college degrees in 3 years. My a bachelors is in Business Administration concentration in Human Resources and my Masters degree is also in HR.



I started this advice column about 9years ago and I was so young but it was something that I always loved to do. I am trying to get back to answering questions, at least a few per day. With that said, if you have questions about school, friends, make up, etc., feel free to ask.





Much love, Teza


advice

Everyone says you can get cute things in thrift stores. Do they mean ones like good will and salvation army? How do I know if it's a good one? Im looking for accessories by the way.

You can get cute stuff anywhere but at those stores its just clothes that people donated. I wouldnt get any from there. I would just feel really weird. Thats just my opinion. But yeah you might find things that you like there.

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I have a friend who says I am her "best friend". Well, lately she hasn't been inviting me places. Like, she is always with other people. I have caught on that everytime she invites me out her other friends are busy. Do you think I am her second choice or maybe I am just overreacting? I have talked to her about it but she makes excuses.

That is kind of how it looks like but you do need to talk to her about it. Even tho she might say oh no thats not how it is. But when you think that her other friends are busy and she asks you to hang out say no and that you have other plans. She will catch on.

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I've had an eating disorder for lets say longer than a year. (anorexia) I finally got over it this summer. I'm worried about school though and how my friends will react because i wasn't eating lunch all last year. Will they make a big deal out of it and will i end up starting it ALL OVER AGAIN????? I RATE HIGH

If they didnt know about it then I dont think they would make it as a big deal. Even tho they might say something about it. Just tell them that you have to eat.. I dont think they would argue about it.

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im a 13 yr old black female in okc and my bf is 16 and my daddy found out everything about what me and him been doin he said if i end up pregnant he is throwing him in jail for statutory rape. im scared about that can that really happen i thought you have to be at least 18 yrs old for all that to happen please anyone look this up for the state of oklahoma

You have to be 18 basiclly in all of the states. He cant go to jail becauses hes only 16 && thers nothing wrong with that. Your dad is just trying to scare you so you dont end up doing anything stupid.

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does water help your voice? if you want to sing

Yeah it is. Also hot tea.

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I hear a lot of people say that applying toothpaste on pimples helps to clear it. I asked my dermatologist if that was a good remedy, but she said that there's no known ingredient in toothpaste that would aid to get rid of pimples. Does it really work? I would try it out myself, but I'm a little skeptical of putting toothpaste on my face.

If you try it, it wont do any harm on your face. I did it once before and it didnt get rid on my pimple but it made it less red and it was smaller. Just dont pop them.

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ok so i have brown hair down to the middle of my back. i always wear it down and thats all. this year i wanna change the style of it, professionaly. any suggestions?

Get a cute shorter cut. Maybe some highlights? You could get it with a lot of layers and the lenght up to your shoulders. Get like light brown higlights. That is just really cute and its so much easier to handle. You can style it any way you want. Curl it with a curling iron. Straighten it or flip it out. Leave it wet && scrunchy. Tie it up half way, make messy buns. Crimp it? Do whatever. Just keep trying new things with your hair until you find something you like.

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Ok i dunno what this would go under and alot of people look here so... I wanna know how to my face clean like no pimples or blackheads like what are some products or things i should do?? Thanks

Honey, products do not help your face get clear! It has chemicals and they do not work all the time! All you need to do is take care of your face. Wash it 3 times a day with warm water && soap and put face lotion on. If you really want something I would suggest Clean and Clear. I think that works the best.

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my mom is always saying im ugly. last sunday for church, i let my hair dry into natural curl/waves and she said it was ugly and i should brush it (badddd idea) and wear some makeup because my face looked "bad". i didnt wear earrings & she always says i look bad when i dont wear them. when i do wear makeup for other occasions she says i look like a prostitute. i dont know what to do anymore! i cant always be best dressed and miss cheerful like she was when she was my age. shes always telling me how thin she was and how everyone liked her figure just to rub it in my face that i have no womanly shape. my dad says i look ok because he sees what it does to my self esteem. everytime i get the slightest blemish, shes the first to point it out. i hate it! someone please help me! any advice will help! ill rate 5s...

Seriously.. your mom is being really iggnorant and she shouldnt be treating you like that. Even though she says all those things your mother still loves you. I`m sure you look gorgeous no matter what your mom says. The next time she says something like that you need to stand up to her. Just say " Look mom! I'm not like you , I'm never going to be like you! Stop treating me like dirt. If you dont like the way I look thats just too bad. You're supposed to be my mother not here to judge me on my looks!" She seems to care a lot about that. Just stand up to her and she has to get it to her head!

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Okay here is the scoop. I have a friend "Tory" who is pregnant. She didn't tell me her aunt did because her grandma kicked her out when she found out that "Tory" was pregnant. Her aunt wants me to talk to her but I can't bring it up until she tells me. But then again I don't think she wants to tell me because It is like a competition thing between us in her eyes, she always compares things. But I don't look at our friendship like that. But anyways when she tells me what can I say to make her feel like I will be there for her, which I will but I still don't know what to say Please HELP

You need to tell Tory that. Once she decides to tell you let her know that you are not there to judge her or anything but that you will be there for her and her baby all the time no matter what!! Talk to her grandma and tell her that it was very wrong of her to do that. If she loved her she wouldnt just let her suffer like that. She needs somewhere to stay and people to be there for her. She will go through a lot of rough things and she needs a lot of people who love her to be there for her. Just talk to Tory and tell her that everything will be okay and that you love her no matter what. Make sure you tell her that you will help her with her baby and everything and that she shouldnt feel scared about anything.

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Ok, I've been going to private school for 9 years, and for the first time I will be going to public. I'm really freaked out. Is public school really as bad as everyone says? I mean do people like actually get beaten up and raped? and how do I protect myself? How do I know who to hang out with? Please help me.

Oh wow.. you need to calm down first of all. I've been going to public school for a really long time && its not bad!! I guess it just depends on what school you acually go to. Its not scary at all and its acaully a lot of fun. You will meet tons of people. When you get there you will see who's a bad influeance and who isnt. You will find people that you like. Not everyone is a bad kid. Yes there is some fights but the raping is higly rare!! Your school will have lots of rules and people will follow it. Be nice to everyone and try to make more friends.

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well... i like this girl a lot. and i want to know the proper way to finger a girl. i dont want to do a bad job and i want her to be pleasured by it. so please tell me the best way to do it. i need to know by thursday.

First off, make sure she wants you to finger her and remember you are doing it to turn her on, not to get you off.

Kiss her and touch her body first so she's aroused (there's nothing worse than someone fingering you when you aren't turned on or wet enough).

You may want to use extra lubricant (such as ky jelly) to make it easier and sexier.

For your next move you could try it standing up, but many guys find this way quite difficult.

It may be better to have her sitting down and leaning back, or lying down - it gives you better access to her vagina.

Slowly ease your finger inside her.

And here comes the best bit of advice I can give you - ask her what feels good.

Move your finger inside her, stroke and gently press in her vagina, and see how it feels for you, and what places she enjoys to be touched.

If she wants, you could try inserting more than one finger - but again, only do this to turn her on, not because you want to try and see how many fingers you can get up her.

Don't just focus on putting your finger(s) inside her.

Stroke or rub her clitoris, or get her to do this whilst you finger her.

You may also want to kiss her, talk about how it feels, or lick or kiss her breasts/ nipples.

Vaginal stimulation can feel fantastic, but make sure it's incorporated into sex, not just an act on its own.

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why is it that my friend one day hes all over me and flirts iwht me and the next he acts like i dont even exist then another day he goes bak to the fliritng self...ah it drives me crazyy i have no idea how to read this kid!

We will never understand guys and their actions. Thats how most of them are. I dont think none of us are sure why he does that. He is the only one who would acually know. But when he is flirting with you dont flirt back too much. Ignore him at times too && he will wonder why you are doing that && it will make him wonder. Seems like he kind of likes to lead you on.

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Hey i wanted to know on this can you change your log on screen name thing..? and if so can i keep my advice column and keep all my answers and ratings..? ill rate high.. you might want to cut the instrutions down for me if you can cause ill get confused easily.. thanks in advance!

No you cant.. you have to have a paid account to do that.

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hey how do you become a moderater ont his site? thanks for the help :D

http://www.advicenators.com/faq.php?t=11
Go there and read it. You have to have a good rating. Answer a lot of questions and update your column.

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well i imed him today and pretty much told him he was a liar and i had moved on and that i wasnt gonna wait for him and good luck with his gf but he got pissed but for once in 2months i dont give a shit about him well i dont want to...i mean i dont think i want him i jsut dont want anyone else to have him eitehr...but now since i was rude to him i doubt we will ever talk agian and thats rly not what i wanted to happen
Taylor

Oh gosh. I'm just glad that you stood up to him && said all that! I mean it doent have to be like that.. like you guys not talking. But who cares if he got pissed. He deserved it. But he will get over it. He should know that the way he treated you was wrong. Just tell him you want to be friends and that you dont want to argue or anything.

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okay this is really hard to explain but i'll try...my best friend ryan (shes a girl) moved and she went out with this guy hunter...hunter imed me one day (after him and my friend broke up) and we talked and stuff and he was so sweet and i thought i liked him but i had a boyfriend and i told him i did so ya...my boyfriend was like a really good friend 2 but i didnt think it was fair to date him when i really liked hunter you know so i broke up with him and on aim i was talking to hunter that same day.and i said guess what and he goes what and i was like i broke up with andrew and he goes you kno whats coming next...will you go out with me! i really wanted to say yes but i wanted to ask my friend first to make sure she was like over him and i said hunter asked me out...do you care if i say yes and she ignored me and started cussing hunter out and then so hunter imed me and said...maybe we should wait,i still like you,and im not taking it back i love you,you just broke up with your boyfriend though,so lets wait. and all that was fine with me....well two days later my friend ryan came and stayed at my house for like a week and then 1st night she was there,hunter and me were texting and he called me and we talked for lk 4 hours (it was the first time we has talked on the phone) anyways and then the next day me and ryan went with my uncle to look at his new house and hunter texted me and i said im out of texts so i cant talk now and so i said he could text ryans phone...so he did and he was like can you hand tayler the phone for a sec...so she did and i gave it back to her (i was like in the car talking to my uncle and i didnt want to like be texting him) and then she handed it to me again and it said "will you go out with me" and again i handed her the phone and just thought i will talk to him about it later...then he texted ryans phone again and said " i really like you...but i guess you dont like me" so then i felt horrible so i texted him back and said "no no i do like you its just i dont want you to hurt me" and he said "i would never hurt you,i love you too much" so then i said "are you sure this is what you want" and he said "i wouldnt want it anyother way" so i said yes...and he was a good boyfriend for like a week and then we would be like talking online and he would say i gtg baby i will call you tonight...then he wouldnt call and then we would fight and all this stuff...and it happened like 3 times...then he texted me and was like "baby im sorry i've been a bitch and im such a dumass for treating you like this and im lucky that you stuck around this long please forgive me...things will change i will be the boyfriend you deserve which is better that what i have been" and then he was better (we still hadnt met in person.but we did see lots of pictures) then he broke up with me said he wanted to be friends and then we would talk ever day texting...but he wouldnt talk to me on the phone and he would always ask me for pictures then the fourth of july he texted me and said "we dont need to be friends" i was like okay whatever..after this im not giving you anymore chances and he goes i dont care your ugly and and i go your not excactly the hottest guy i have dated eitehr and he goes oh ya thats why u wanted me soo bad and i was like it wasnt you i wanted hun it was a boyfriend but its fine cause im over it and he didnt text me back for like three days and when he did he re-wrote what i had written him the "it wasnt you i wanted hun it was a boyfriend but thats okay im over it" and then he wrote oh thats nice you played me..and he was like look im sorry ok can we jsut start over i understand if you dont want to be friends i jsut feel guitly sayin all that shit to you and im sorry and then we talked and i was like well i dont know if i can be friends with you...you hurt me and he said and you hurt me and im sorry and i was like well i only said it cause you were being rude and acted like you hated me and even though i liked you i wasnt gonna be like oh baby im sorry i love you...and he was like i jsut said it cause i had nothing to say and said he had to go and asked me to get on aim the next morning so i did and we worked everything out and then we talked on the phone every so often and then this whole thing happened where he said sorry i cant call you and i sent a message to christina (a girl thats friends with me and hunter) and it said if he calls you three way me and i accidently sent it to hunter and he was like yeah he got really mad at was like you thought i would to you blah blah blah and said i hate you get out of my life then the next morning he texted me and said sorry i was jsut upset cause i thought you lied to me and i for some reason forgave him and we talked and we "friends" and then he said i like you and i was like ok..and he would say i love you and i want to meet in person and all this"well he said that one night and the next morning he said i dont like you anymore theres no other girl theres jsut no girl at all...and then we just talked as "friends" and then he was on the phone with christina and asked her to three way me so she did but i didnt really talk directly to him cause he was only on the phone for like 5 minutes cause then he had to go and i stayed on the phone and chrisitna said hunter told me to tell you he likes someone..but he wont say who and i was like okay so later that night hunter texted me and i asked him who he liked and he was like i dont want to tell anyone and i was like okay well if you get ready to tell someone you can trust me and he was like ok and he said i like justins girlfriend,ariel (justins his best friend)and then he said i gotta go i will be back on later (he has been texting me from his sn) then his friend justin was like hey and i go hi and he was like whats wrong and i said stuff with hunter and he goes like what? and i said its jsut hard liking someone that doesnt like you back and justin said do you know who he likes and i said no and he goes if you do please tell me i wont tell him i sware and i said im sorry but im not gonna do that to him and he said this is hunter on justins sn i jsut wanted to see if i could trust you and i can so thanks and i dont like ariel i like you and it turns out him and justin were together the whole time and i was like ok no big deal i couldnt be mad cause he liked me again and then i didnt talk to him for 3 days and he texted me and said i dont like you i like someone else sorry and i got on aim and i was like who do you like and he said well i like you but u live really far away but if you move here i would love to go out with you (we live like 20 minutes away,and my parents are looking at houses out there) and so i was like so theres no other girl and he goes no there is her names courtnei and i like her alot and i was like oh and then i found out he has asked her out and she liked him and he liked her the only thing keeping them from going out was that she had a boyfriend when i started typing this i just wanted to see what you thought but unfortunately since its so long since the beginning of this i jsut found out in his friends away message that him and courtnei are going out and i dont know what to do i mean i want to just tell him off and be like im sicking of you treating me liked this and i could careless if we ever speak again and stand up to him but that would screw everything up with us for good and a big part of me still wants him..i dont know why cause i have had guys that treat me 10x better and since we broke up two guys have asked me out but i have said no for him...i was waiting for him and then he jsut moves on like im nothing and i feel like just...i dont know im just really upset and dont know what to do everyone tells me oh my gosh taylor just move on but i cant its i dont know theres something about him that i cant let go of...what that is i dont know cause i mean hes hott but not that hott hes nice sometimes and i just i dont know should i tell him that i like him that i love him that i want him that i hate him or as hard as it may be jsut not talk to him and see if he comes back to me or even notices im not there for him...or if he cares anyways please please help me... *** broken hearted
taylor

That has got to be the longest question I ever read!! Anyways.. this guy seems like a player && if I was you I wouldnt want to waste my time on his bull shit. I would just try to be friends with him. I dont know what you would really want to hear. But he seriously is playing around. He messes with your head && you let him. He likes you one day and the next day he doesnt or he just likes someone else. Thats so fucked up && things like that piss me off. I dont know how you can just take his crap like that. Get over him! He seems to be getting over you. It makes me wonder if he even ever liked you. I mean if he did he wouldnt be treating you like that. You even said that other guys treated you 10x better then him so dont you think you should move on. You do deserve to be treated better then how he is treating you. He isnt a good boyfriend. How can he just tell you he likes you and he loves you && then say shit like you're ugly? Thats just messed up. You need to tell him to fuck off and stop doing that no matter how much you like him or care about him. He seems to be a ass hole most of the time. I know that moving on isnt that easy but if you think of how he is and that you will find someone better it will be easier. He seems to care at times but I dont think you should go out with him ever again. Being friends with him is just good enough. Hope you figure it all out!!

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ok my boyfriend is 1 year younger than me..is that bad?

Not at all!

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Should girls shave their vaginas?

If you feel like you want to and need to then yes. Most guys like it when its shaved && I just think its right to shave it. I mean having pubic hair isnt that great.

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ok this might be long but i really need advice
ok this summer i went to an over night camp for about 5 weeks and i hooked up with a guy that is 3 years older then me. we kissed and held hands and sometimes he would touch my breasts and my ass and put his hand down my pants But one night it went a little to far and we had sex then the next day he broke up with me then he left to go back to his home and i was still @ camp Then all the guys at camp were asking me outa nd stuff and it made me feel special but then this one guy asked me out lets call him bob. I really like bob alot so i went out with him and stuff then one thing led to another and stuff and we had sex and it was so good but that was my last week at camp so i went home me and all my friends always hung out @ this ark down the street from me and stuff And then ppl started asking me if i wanted to come over to their house for the night and this kid that hangs out with us letrs call him dan started to grab my but and my breasts then they all come over to my hosue and everyone left exept dan and he came one to me and started to un zip my pants and shit and i ened up giving a blowjob...then 2 nights ago i slept over my friends house because my parents were gone for a night and they didn't trust me so i was in the guestroom and i guess it was about 2am and her older brother came into my room only in his boxers and i was just in my see thru thong with no shirt on and he started dto kiss me and touch me and said take off my thong and i did *because her brother is hott) and then we had sex it was the best! and then the next morning he came into the shower with me and we had sex agian and then he told everyone and now im called a Slut but im not really Am I? and boys touch my ass and breast and try to put there hands down my pants but i don't know...if i am a slut pllz give me ways that i can not become a slut. Thanx

Woah.. well if you are a slut you cant just stop being one. People will always call you that. Honestlly, I'm not gonna call you a slut or anything but the things that you did with all those guys seem slutty. Its just def. wrong. I mean how old are you anyways?? Well I'm guessing you would have to be like eather 13-16 but still.. too young for that. Anyways, you should be glad that your friends are still on your side && that they are'nt calling you those names. If you want to stop being slutty and stop being called a slut then you need to stop doing those things. Dont just let people say shit to you like that. Stand up to them and say shut the fuck up. What I do is none of your god damb buisness. Oh.. and tell your friends brother that he needs to stop saying things to other people. I doubt he will tho because all guys HAVE to tell their buds about it. It makes them look "cool". Yeah its lame but still. So you're the only one that can help yourself stop being a slut. If you acually want to have sex && do all that other stuff, wait until you have a good boyfriend. Dont go from guy to guy. Just wait until that one guy comes along. You need to think of the things that could happen! You could end up getting pregant or getting some disease no matter how protected you think you are. Just always make sure you are 110% safe. Good luck to you!

-Teza

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