about

Hi, I'm Courtney. I want to become a pre-school teacher :] and I've been though a whole heck of a lot, so feel free to ask me anything, i'll do my best to help ! xxo.
"i refuse to sink."

advice

is it possible to be allergic to pot? well i mean, i know it is... but i've been in a room full of people smoking pot and never had a reaction, so am i more likley not to be allergic to it?

i don't do drugs, but i know people who do, and to see if theyre allergic before smoking it, they rubbed it on their skin, and if they have a reaction close to poison ivy occur, than youre allergic.. if nothing happens, then youre cleared.
and if you do smoke it if youre allergic to it, than you will get flu-like symptoms, and possibly some paranoia.
but if youve been in a room full of people smoking pot and youve had no reaction, than yes, youre more than likely not allergic to it.
hope i helped, xxo.

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Hey I love your advice so I thought I'd give this a shot!:)

Last summer, my friend and I met up with this guy peter and his friend. Initially, my friend was meeting up with peter and I was suppose to talk to his friend. Keep in mind this was the first time any of us were meeting each other. Well peter ended up liking me and his friend was trying to get with my friend, but didn't work out as well. Peter and I would text each other and try to hang out but one of us would be busy when we would try .. but he would be really sweet about it. I remember I said something like I wont be able to see you for a couple weeks because I'm going on vacation!! And he was like oh babe, that is going to suck!! Just sweet little things like that, the little things couunt for me. Well then we just sort of stopped talking and my friend had texted him recently asking if he wanted to hang out with me and her. Well things didn't work out (I don't know the reason) but I feel like messaging him on facebook saying something like..

"Hey Peter I heard syd (my friend) was trying to get you to hang out with us .. I haven't talked to you in a while .. too bad you couldnt."

I don't know what to say. He lost all his numbers I guess because when my syd texted him he didnt know her number so I don't really want to text him first. I'd rather like message him on facebook, see what he says, and then start texting and stuff. I don't want it to be all random, but if I texted him saying it was me I don't know if he would remember who it was at first .. becauase the last time we talked was last summer so if I messaged him on facebook first, he would see my picture and remember.

Anyways, do you think thats a good idea? What do you think I could say to him that would not make me look dumb? Thanks for taking the time to read, I'll return the favor :)

thanks, im glad you think so :] hahaa.
but id just like to let you know that this pretty much same exact scenario happened to me last summer. freaky.
ill tell you what i did ... and what you should do, since i went through it and know how you feel.
okay so, i totally agree, messaging him would be better than texting him. i mean, i texted the guy first.. and he didnt know who i was because he didnt recognize my number.. and let me tell you, THAAAT was embarassing hahaa. so then i messaged him and he recognized me by my picture.. much less awkward. he apologized for not knowing who i was and all of that, but because the texting thing might lower your self esteem for a few moments, the safe bet would be messaging him. so good choice; good idea.
i said to him on the message, "heyy i dont know if you remember me or not, but me and [my friends name] were talking about last summer.. do you remember when ..... hahaa that was so fun. we should all catch up again sometime :] !"
.. its always good if you try to make it not random by saying that they came up in conversation and you were thinking about them. it makes the guy feel good and NOT creeped out at all then just being like, HEYYY REMEMBER ME ?! yuh know ? and what you said was good.. but i would put like a past memory in there along with it. like.. "Hey Peter, its been sucha long time haha! me and syd were talking about that one time we all met up with you and [his friends name here]. haha good times :] she also told me that she invited you to hang out with us again; so we could all catch up, its too bad that you couldnt though :/ i wouldve liked to chill again, yuh know? :]"
thats like a little, i wanna catch up message. alot of people do it. and im telling you whatever you say he wont be turned off or creeped out. facebook is for connecting with people you havent seen in a while. and i promise he'll answer you back :] you can keep it short and sweet or long and sassy, whatever you wanna say will be fine, but those were just my suggestions. and i know it doesnt seem like it, but adding ... [dot dot dots] can sometimes make it awkward [yeah even over the internet, its like an awkward silence] so just try to avoid those.
good luck ! have fun, and if you need anything else, you know how to reach me :] hope i helped, xxo.

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so im not the best at startin conversations no matter who im with, an i can tell it annoys me best friend and i dont wont her think im boring. so anyone got any tips on how to start an interesting convo ?

this might sound stupid or weird or whatever, but when i want to start a conversation [an INTERESTING one] i usually strike up a conversation with "would you rather..." it is like the best way to start conversations and i promise, it will lead into different conversations. you could be like, "i know this is so random, but would you rather be able to fly or be invisible?" [stuff like that haha]
and the "what ifs.." conversations are always good. like, "what if robet pattinson just showed up right now?"
you could always talk about dreams youve had too. theyre always crazy topics and she'll contibute also. like, "last night i had this dream and it was so freaky!!..." [then tell her what it was about]
randomness is the cure for bordem. trust me.
if you need anything else or any more ideas, i have sooo many, so just inbox me :] good luck, have fun ! hope i helped, xxo.

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Hello, I am 16, and i am so sick of my life i really am. So far i ahve llost alot of my close friends,well what i thought was my best friends. They all left because well im not sure really.But have you ever just wanted to give up? yeh thats what i want to do really.give up. not sure what to do anymore. this life that everyone is talkinga about,this great life,is nothing but a lie.

:/ i know its so cliche to say that "i know how you feel" but i really do. i cant tell you how many times i have just wanted to give up..
but im glad i didnt.
everything ive been through, the people ive lost along the way.. the things ive gained, its all worth it in the long run. it makes you strong and it makes you who you are right now. and you might be sick of it at the moment, but you wont be for long.
theres a quote that really helped me look forward to my future when i was going through some rough times.. "Be strong now, 'cause things will get better. It may be stormy now, but it can't rain forever."
its so true. you just have to know that you'll get past this and that what doesnt kill you only makes you stronger. sometimes life is about growing as a person and realizing that the people you thought you knew were only strangers and that understanding why people do what they do isnt as important as understanding that its just who they are.
and im not gonna tell you that everyone has this picture perfect great life, but its not a lie. you have a great life.. but right now its not as great as it could be. when you get knocked down you just have to get up again, dont let anyone ever bring you down. i know that you dont know what to do, but im telling you that you should either talk to your "best friends" and ask them what you did to make them leave or just forget about them. theyre not the only people on the earth.. it took me a while to realize that people are people. their true colors will eventually surface. you can meet new people and make new friends every day of your life. you're only 16.. you cant give up now; i know you have it in you to hold your head up high and keep going. you have your whole life ahead of you. just think of the oppurtunities that are awaiting you. you cant let these people make you think that youre not worth anything, because you are worth something. youre worth alot. you have your family who loves you and cares about you and the ability to achieve anything and to be great :]
so do what you do best and show them what youre made of. youre an awesome person; be who you are. good luck, hope i helped, and if you need anything else, im always here. xxo.

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17/f ok i've always been chased, i've never ever chased after a boy. but there was this boy who was new to my school & i always thought he was cute but never talked to him. everyone said how he was like awkward & kind of weird. but i like weird. i think its interesting. anyway, i found his myspace like a week ago. he accepted me & i said like hi you have good taste in music & we started talking that weekend on myspace, & then he asked for my number. & we talked for like maybe 2 hours texting? & it was good. & then then the next day he didn't text me & i was bummed. so the next day, my friend was like just text him. so i did, & we had like a really great conversation, we have a lot in common, & he asked me to hang out that night. but it was like wednesday, & i'm still in school & it was late, so i couldn't. so i told him i couldn't but that would've been cool. & then yesterday, my friend told me to just text him & ask him to hang out this weekend so i did & he asked me like what i was doing, when, & the time. & i told him & he was like ok shounds good. i might have to work but earlier. so i mean was that a yes? or what. i mean, if he doesn't text me.. do i just assume its no? or should i text him like tomorrow when were suppose to hang out & be like so can you hang out tonight? or is that too pushy. like i don't know how to handle it, because i mean i'm starting the conversations, but i feel like hes making a lot of big moves, like with hanging out & asking for my number. so its just been like a rollar coaster this past week. one day i'm like so happy & then the next its like a really bad day.

so what do i do?
my main question is should i text him if he can still hang out? or no? & any other help is appreciated. :)

ooh, i know how you feel :] ive been through this type of situation before.. and youre definetely right, it is exactly like a rollercoaster hahaa.
but heres what you do..
he asked you to hang out and you couldnt because it was during the week and you have school, totally okay and not your fault. but he might have felt like a bit of rejection and backed off. [guys are sensitive too haha, they just dont show it as much] by you declining his invitation to hang out, he was basically waiting for you to come to him and to ask HIM to hang.. so you would have to make the plans and everything. which you did, but those plans werent made in stone because he didnt give you a clear answer..
i got your information right so far i hope :] hahaa. sorry if im confusing youu. but heres the thing, dont just assume its a "no" and that he doesnt want to hang out, because if he didnt want to chill with you, he would have never asked you to hang out with him first. thats a 100% fact.
text him tomorrow, thats not being pushy at all because youre just making sure hes up for it. you could text him and be like, "hey :] i dont know if you remember the other day when i mentioned hanging out tonight.. you up for it? i was thinking.. [then list time and place]"
thats the best way to do it because its not as if youre being pushy or clingy or anything. its low key and chill. he seems like a very reserved person though so dont let that bring you down or make you think that he doesnt want to talk to you. and him not texting you first or not making conversation will take time and patience. alot of boys dont know what to say or dont know what the right thing to say will be.. theyll get the hang of it after talking to you for longer but its less intimidating for them if you start the conversations first because then theyll just go with the flow and become more comfrotable and outspoken. some guys are just like that :] nothing to have a bad day over. perfectly normal.
and give yourself some credit too ! youre making some big steps with asking him to hang out and all of that. :] i mean, you could tease him a little bt and be like, "pshh youre not much of a conversation starter are youu ;] just kidding i dont mind" and he'll open up soon enough.
good luck ! hope i helped and if you need anything else, you know how to reach me :] xxo.

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I'm 15. My boyfriend is 17. I am a pretty normal person, but he is a complete geek. He wears glasses, likes computers, etc. I don't mind though, because he's still cute and I love him. The problem is that we have only been dating for 3 weeks but he acts like we're married! It's Valentines day on Sunday but I won't be seeing him so today he gave me this huge rose and a chocolate and a teddy bear and this huge home made card and everything! The worst part is that it was in front of everybody! He wants to be with me 24/7. I don't mind that, but I also need some time with my friends! It feels like he's smothering me with too much love. I want to take it a bit slower or the love will fizzle out too soon. How do I tell him it's too much too soon without hurting his feelings?

AlyssaMarie15 's advice is NOT advice, dont listen to her hun. she doesnt know anything about you and cannot just say that stuff. you should really report what she said, but anyways..

3 weeks is not a very long time, and i see where you're coming from, but maybe put yourself in his shoes.. he obviously cares for you very much and it started even before you became a couple. im completely certain that his intentions are not to smother you but to show you that he is falling for you and that you deserve the best. i mean, not every girl is going to find a guy that gets her all of that stuff and is bold enough to give it to her infront of people, especially your friends, so give him some credit :] it takes alot of confidence to do that, even though you may not think so.
with that said and that thought in mind, either talk to him in person or over the phone or whatever. and nicely tell him how you feel. first thank him again for the sweet things he got you and how youre sure he put alot of thought into the gifts and that youre very greatful [mkae sure he knows youre not just taking it for granted or disliked it] then continue to say how although it was such a sweet thing to do you just think that for 3 weeks the relationship is escalating a little too fast for you and youd rather just take it slower more baby steps then big leaps. yuh know ? and just tell him that he did a very caring thing but to just take it down a knotch so you both can get used to eachother and more understanding.
hell get it and you wont hurt his feelings, i promise. youll only hurt his feelings by not telling him whats wrong. you obviously want to have every moment be special and not just spur of the moment [which can sometimes be good] but for 3 weeks, you have a right to feel a little overwhelmed, hes just very happy to have you as his girlfriend :] you have what every girl wants.. except youre getting it very fast.
dont worry, itll get better, but communicaion is key :] if you need anything else, feel free to inbox me ! good luck girl, xxo.

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15/f
I have a crush on a classmate.I had my friend tell him I like him today,but he made a remark which meant he didn't believe it and laughed it off.Later today,I approached him and asked him why he laughed,and added that I told her to tell him that.He laughed again but I also noticed that he was blushing.He won't tell me if he likes me or not and now he's aware of my feelings for him.I noticed him looking at me before and stuff,but I can't decipher the hints.Does he like me or not? I'm planning to confront him about it next week...

hmm, boys can be very hard to read sometimes, but it sounds like he doesnt know what he wants. hes most likely trying to figure you out right now and hes probably confused because he didnt think you would ever be interested in him [remember when he didnt believe it and laughed it off.. then laughed again and blushed..? yeah.]
although some boys may seem very confident in themselves, when it comes to asking people out and all of that, they become very guarded and shy. if hes looking at you, thats nothing but a good sign.. if he didnt like you, im sure he wouldnt be looking at you occasionally.
i cant tell you if he liked you or not, i can only tell you that i think he does from the information you have given me. and i disagree with advice below me.. you wont seem clingy. youll seem like a girl who wants to know if the guy she likes feels the same way. i mean, he knows you like him so now its up to him to not leave you hanging :] [sometimes boys do this though, its normal] confornt him.. but in a nice way,. dont demand answers right away, just start talking to him and then lead into it.. if you just go, "tell me if you like me." he'll be turned off. but you can be like, "i know you know that i like you and i was just really wondering if you maybe like me too..." and see what he says, but be gentle.. he seems reserved with this.
good luck ! if you need anything else, feel free to inbox me :] hope i helped, and dont sweat it.. he'll come around. xxo.

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I'm fourteen he's sixteen. He has mono. I can't kiss him. What am I supposed to do??

awww, its okay :]
i mean, think about it this way.. would you rather get mono by kissing him.. or stay healthy and just stick it out for a couple months ?
ANDD, plus; the longer you have to wait to kiss him, the better the kiss will be when hes cured :]
its something to look forward to, the both of you. im sure hes just as unhappy about this as you are right now.
you can also do cute things like kiss a piece of paper [if you put lipstipck on first] and then give it to him with a little note on the side saying, these lips will miss yours but heres a kiss for you to always have :] or something cute like that, he'll love it.
you guys can still hold hands and hug and talk and do any other things that you might be up for. but just no kissing, no sharing drinks.. nothing along those lines. maybe cook together. bake cookies. anything :] there are plenty of things to do besides kissing.
youll be okay, hang in there kid :] good luck and if you need anything else, feel free to inbox me ! xxo. hope i helped.

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17/F
Boyfriend is 17 also
We've been going out for 3 months

Ok, now that the introduction is over, let's move right along into the question!

Well, my boyfriend is an amazing guy and we get along beautifully. I could honestly see spending the rest of my life with a guy like him. However, he's SUPER shy. He never talks to anyone. He's just very quiet and focused. Sometimes I even have a hard time getting him to talk. When I do get him to talk, we usually talk about how much we love each other. Now, don't get me wrong, it's wonderful and he makes me feel like the luckiest girl in the world. I was just wondering... Is this normal? Like, do couples in healthy relationships basically only talk about how much they love each other? I mean, we do tlak about other things... Loving each other is just the most common topic.
Thank you so much!

yess, its completely normal :]
but remember, its only been 3 months, and eventually, he will open up. but for him to open up you have t be open with him, so you can start random conversations and stuff and the pressure wont be just on him. sometimes when guys dont have something to say, theyll go to the, "love" conversation because they want to make you feel good :]
hope i helped ! if you need anything else, feel free to inbox me :] good luck, and you have a healthy relationship thats NORMAL, dont worry :] xxo.

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What do you think of these dresses for 8th grade graduation?
Which dress do you like best? + any other suggestions?

http://www1.macys.com/catalog/product/index.ognc?ID=437037&CategoryID=37783

http://www1.macys.com/catalog/product/index.ognc?ID=447040&CategoryID=18109&LinkType=PDPZ1

http://www3.jcpenney.com/jcp/X6.aspx?DeptID=50455&CatID=51773&GrpTyp=PRD&ItemID=17d8a60&attrtype=&attrvalue=&CMID=50455%7c51280&Fltr=&Srt=&QL=F&IND=39&cmVirtualCat=&CmCatId=50455|51280|51773

http://www3.jcpenney.com/jcp/X6.aspx?DeptID=50455&CatID=51773&GrpTyp=PRD&ItemID=171f5a6&attrtype=&attrvalue=&CMID=50455%7c51280&Fltr=&Srt=&QL=F&IND=45&cmVirtualCat=&CmCatId=50455|51280|51773

http://www.forever21.com/product.asp?catalog%5Fname=FOREVER21&category%5Fname=dress&product%5Fid=2066589810&Page=1

http://www.forever21.com/product.asp?catalog%5Fname=FOREVER21&category%5Fname=dress&product%5Fid=2059045245&Page=3

http://www.forever21.com/product.asp?catalog%5Fname=FOREVER21&category%5Fname=dress&product%5Fid=2060590923&Page=4#

Keep the price in mind.

Is that the kind of dresses you were to graduation?

I don't know what do you think?

http://www1.macys.com/catalog/product/index.ognc?ID=447040&CategoryID=18109&LinkType=PDPZ1

or..

http://www3.jcpenney.com/jcp/X6.aspx?DeptID=50455&CatID=51773&GrpTyp=PRD&ItemID=171f5a6&attrtype=&attrvalue=&CMID=50455%7c51280&Fltr=&Srt=&QL=F&IND=45&cmVirtualCat=&CmCatId=50455|51280|51773

hope i helped ! xxo.

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Me and my girlfriend of 6 months decided we need some time apart to find ourselves. Its kinda like a break but we dont know if we are actully going to get back toegether. We are takeing time apart because we have started to take each other for granted and we have become people we are not. However we love each other as much as we know. The day was going fine the after we hooked up we sat around and both got crabby, then it all came out. The twist is we are both seniors in high school and we are going to dfferent collges far apart. Is it worth getting back toegether? How do i get her back if even its just as a friend?

you have to be honest with yourself and think about the fact that when you go to college.. there are going to be ALOT of girls.. alot of SINGLE girls.. if you were to get back into a relationship with her, would you be able to contain yourself and not stray or cheat. and would you be able to trust her at HER college with all of those single boys ? its something you have to think about it.. and im not saying it cant be done, it CAN be done, you can be faithful and trust her [vice versa] but you have to REALLY be honest with yourself right now. would you have the will power to say no ?
if your answer to that question is no.. then it wouldnt be worth getting back together and youd save her, yourself, and the relationship alot of pain.
if your answer to that question is yes, then alright. it IS worth getting back together with her and you should tell her how you feel.
if your answer to that question is maybe.. then i dont think it would be worth getting back together because if you want this relationship to last and be a long one, youre going to have to be completely sure with NO doubts that this is what you want and youre willing to do whatever it takes to stay that way.
with that said, you can still have her as a friend. dont end on a bad note if thats what you wish to do [just be friends] i mean, if your friends, theres always the chance that you both could get back in the relationship together in the future. you just have to be nice about it and sweet.. it has to come from your heart. tell her that you really like her and that the 6 months you spent with her were amazing, but you wouldnt want to jeopardize what you have because you care about her and you think that since college is coming and all, that it would best to be friends right now. and that you want to be her friend more than anything. and that youre sorry and shes a great person and you didnt want it to come to this but that she means alot to you.
she might be hurt at first, but i promise if you give her time she'll get over it and talk to you :] its just how girls work. but just be kind and patient with her. if she doesnt want to talk, wait a couple days and then try talking to her again. if you are persistent and show that she really means alot to you and you still want to talk to her, then it'll all work out in your favor. trust me.
good luck ! hope i helped, and if you need anything else, feel free to inbox me :] xxo.

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16/ f
okay , sorry if this is reallllly long & confusing.
so me & this girl named Ally became really good friends last summer.
But, when we started to hang out a lot in the beginning, her current bestfriend (Sally) like just got ignored by Ally.
But once me and Ally became really good friends,
then Sally and me started to become pretty close too.
then, soooo much drama occured like SO much.
Ally is the one who caused probably 90% of all the drama. She'd tell me one thing about Sally, and tell Sally something about me. She constantly tried to get me and Sally to hate each other. Sooner or later, it worked. We both fell for Allys lies, ally is such a good liar its hard to tell when she is or isnt.
But one day, Sally and I got tired of Ally's crap and decided we didnt want ANYTHING to do with her .
we simply : befriended her ?

but , instead of accepting that fact :
she made it into a lot bigger deal then it should've been. she tried getting people at school mad at us , which didnt work. because at that time everyone disliked ally alot , because she lies & makes up shit all the time .
its ridiculous.

but monthes passed ,
and i finally forgave her
( i cannnot hold a grudge to save my life )
so , then Sally decided to might as well forgive her to.
then now, all the same crap that happened at the beginning, is replaying.

its insane .
i jusst dont know what to do ?

i dont want to not be friends with either of them because it'd be pointless and cause even more drama.

gah , dont you just loooove high school ?

alright, i know that you said itd be pointless to not be friends with either of them because it would cause alot of drama, but think about those couple months when you WERENT friends with ally.. they were pretty drama free, werent they ? except for the fact that ally tried to turn people agaiunst you [which didnt work] there wasnt much going on.
by being friends with ally again you are ASKING for drama. obviously that girl is full of it. my number one advice i could give you is to just be friends with sally and not ally. and i know that might not be what you want to do because you want to be the bigger person, but think about it.
but if you really want to be friends with both of them, then heres my suggestion.. talk to sally and tell her how you feel. that youre maybe thinking of becoming friends with ally again, but that you dont want sally to listen to anything ally says because you both know that she is a liar. and maybe you can be FRIENDLY to ally but not hang out with her outside of school and stuff. you dont have to ignore her or be mean to her, but i would really sugest not hanging out with her. because you also get a reputation and she will lie again.
another thing you could do would be to talk to aly about why she lies so much.. maybe she lies because of problems she has that she wants to forget, so she makes problems with you because she wants others to feel her pain. or she could just be a trouble maker and theres no point in talking to her about it, but it could be worth a shot.
good luck, hope i helped ! and if you need anything else, feel free to inbox me :] xxo.

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My boyfriend has a gift. He can comeup with a billion cute things to call me all the time. I have like three and they are all kinda lame.

Can you each give me like your top 10 cute nicknames for your boyfriends?

If you don't have 10 that is cool but could you please just tell me what are some cute nicknames you call your boyfriend AND HE LIKES THEM.

Thank you!

I will give everyone a rating!

- baby
- babe
- bear
- hun
- stud
- handsome
- dork

you could try almost anything.. people have such random ones like my firend calls her boyfriend poop. poopy and hubby. and fire. and sexy. and muffin.
well, good luck :] hope i helped, and have fun !

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Okay, so recently to sum my story up short, My Boyfriend and I have been together for almost 5years. In the past I have caught him maybe 2yrs ago lying about girls he had slept with and he put it all out on the table who and what he lied about. 2 years later here we are he lied to me again saying he was going to sleep Friday night because he had to "work" saturday morning an I didn't trust him at all because his whole story about working had been changing, because he lives out of town also! He just recently moved away as well, so he said basically he couldn't come into town because he had to work. I trusted that he said he had to work even though things were sketchy! SO I called his friend later that night he picked up the phone an hungup an I heard music playing , eventually he called an chewed me out saying he was sleeping an stop calling him. I just so happened to check his account and see he was lying and at a nude bar? I kept thinking why would he lie, I caughthim an drove all the way to south carolina to fix things with him NOTE:i didnt do anything wrong, I think any female would have done the same an checked up on their bf of 5 YEARS. So he is wanting to break up because I went on his online banking and he foundout tuesday I tried logging in again and he changed his password so I couldn't go on an I assumed maybe he was hiding stuff and questioned him about it? I wrote him a long email saying if he wanted closure I will give it to him an called him that night to talk, this time he wasnt yelling at me on the phone he listened an just commented saying I dont trust him an never did, an that's why he did it an tried to get away with it because he knew I wouldn't approve of him going out like he did. Well needless to say we ended the convo on good terms he said he would call me and hasn't called yet, it's been about a day now! SO I want to know am I wrong? What can I do to fix it? I told him I would go to counseling to do whatever it took to make it work an would trust him but at the same time he has to gain that back from me? I don't know what more to do I have talked to al kinds of people at work, managers everything and have no clue what to do?? ANY advice would be appreciated , Thank you SO much!

ohmygod, NO! you are most definetely NOT wrong, he is, in EVERY way possible. it is normal and justified for you to look into what is going on and what WAS going on. he LIED to you and then fessed up about the "true" stories of his sexual relationships. I mean, yeah, good for him.. but thats the first strike. the second strike was when when he lied about sleeping and in actuality, he was at a nude bar. the thrid strike was when he changed his password so that you could no longer have access to his personal information.. this just screams, "im guilty." it really does. and if he wants to break up with you, its because he knows that you're not going to let him get away with lying and you're not going to let him think that you're gullible enough. AND on top of all of that, hes trying to turn this entire thing around on you to make YOU seem like the bad guy by saying that you dont trust him and never did.. uhm, YOU DID TRUST HIM, at one point, until he broke it.. multiple times.
dont take the blame for this. you did absolutley nothing wrong, and he should be fixing this, not you. but you also have to ask yourself the question: do you want to fix this? is it worth it?
i mean, think about it, do you want to stay in this relationship being paranoid that he is lying to you or hiding things from you ? like thats goig to be the biggest thing, and i know 5 years is a LONG time, but do you want to spend another 5 going over the same thing ? lies, betrayl.. ?its up to you darling.
but if you want to fix it, you have to talk to him. communication is key. sitting around, waiting for him to call you is not going to solve anything. and dont do it over the phone. meet face to face and talk it out. suggest going to couples therapy, and if youre serious about that, then look up a therapist who specializes in that field that is in your area and gie him the information. and yes, youre exactly right.. he does have to gain that trust back from you.. youre not just going to grant him it. sure, you can forgive him.. but never forget.
i hope i helped, and if you need anything else, feel free to inbox me :] good luck and be strong, youre an awesome person and you deserve an equally awesome guy, xxo.

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thankx for the great advice :-) but she said shes not at the point yet where she can be happy and live life. I understand this because its still pretty fresh (just a year) but she is away at college so theres no way to really have fun together. i was thinking of making her something to send through the computer any ideas?

no problem :] you can use those ideas in the future ;]
and yeah ! definetly, i have some ideas..

- you could send her an e-mail. i know, not very original, but its classic. you can just write her a letter that starts off about how youll always be here for her and if she ever needs to talk.. youll be there.
- you could also send her song lyrics or a song from youtube or something that is abut friendship or something that relates to her situation and how a person will never be forgotten.. maybe something like forever young.
- you could make a powerpoint with pictures of her and her friend and you and her and be sentimental.
- send her a fun video game .. and just be like thining of you throug this hard time..
- maybe suggest this site to her so she can ask for help.. sometimes giving them a place to go will make them realize theyre not alone and that you care.
- or you could combine everything together and send it to her :]

anything is possible :] good luck ! have fun, and hope i helped. if you need anything else, im here :] xxo.

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i have a problem again with the same guy :[
so yesterday my phone accidently called my ex and he texted me and was like what and im like huh? and hes like why did you call and im like sorry my phone did. i didnt mean to. and hes like ok bye then
and im like so youre not gonna even talk to me..
and hes like why and im like um i dont know maybe talk to me like a normal friend and hes like i cant and im like why and hes like i dont know i just cant and im like i dont know what i did but thats cool i guess. and hes like you made out with another guy while i was tihnking about get back together with you. and im like and im like im sorry but i didnt know that and blah blah blah and hes like i told you i was thinking about it. and im like ok welll im sorry. stuff happens sometimes.
and hes like what will you do for me to forgive you and we were talking and stuff and he told me to send him some pictures. and i realllllllly didnt want to and im like you cant come back to me again and expect me to give you pictures whenever you want becuase he dont deserve them either. so we were talking and stuff and of course i gave in and sent him some. but i asked for some in return.
and then im like i miss you. and hes like i miss you too. and im like why are you all of a sudden talking to me after two weeks of ignoring me. and hes like i dont know im still mad at you but i dont know. and im like im still mad at you too. and hes like why and im like because you found another girlfriend and hes like well yeah but you made out with another guy. and im like while we werent together!
and im like if you have another girl then why did you ask me for all these pictures. and hes like funny and were friends (i dont know waht he meant by that) and im like then if were just friends then why didnt you just get this stuff from your girlfriend. i feel so dumb right now. and hes like i could but i just wanted to see if you could do it. and im like wow thanks.
and then i get a text back saying that it really wasnt my ex and that he was actullay sleeping and that it was really his friends the whole time.
i honestly dont believe that. i know the way he says stuff and texts and stuff and i got pictures of him.

his \"friend\" was calling me dumb and stuff and hes like his girlfreind is here now and she thinks this is so funny and all this stuff.
and im like go wake him up right now and tell him to call or text me. and then i get a text saying hey sorry my friends were tlaking to you and they were stupid for doing that. i deleted all the pictures and he said all this stuff.
(i could tell it was like set up or something or like he was lying but he wont tell me the truth)
and im like go be with your girlfreind bye. and hes like it really wasnt her she was sleeping. and he just told me she was laughing at all this. so i dont know what to believe.

and then i texted him later that night adn i was like i cant sleep. and hes like dont let my friend gets to you. im sorry. you really are one of my good friends. i can tlak to you about anything.
and im like but thats not what i want and you know that! i want to be more then just friends and i got so happy cause i thought we were going to get back together
and hes like that wasnt me. what do you not get?!
and im like ok i understand.
im like i want you back. i miss you. why do you have to havea girlfreidn. and hes like you pushed me away.
and then i just gave up and went to sleep cause it was like 3 in the morning anyways. and i texted him earlier today and im like so are we just friends or is there gonna be something more? and hes like just friends.

god i hate myself for falling for that. i know it wasnt his friends. and i know it was him the whole time.
but why would he do that?
im so confused. i feel so gross and dirty for doing all that and actually falling for him agian after just starting to get satisfied with my life.

im sooooo sorry for how long and confusing this is!

its okay :] you dont have to apologize for anything girl, its totally fine.
and yeah, that whole thing was definitely an entire set up. he wanted to, once again, get a rise out of you, but he also wanted you to send him pictures, mainly so he can look at them, but also to know that he still has a hold of you and that you still want him. he enjoys knowing that you havent let him go. and im pretty sure he asked you for pictures because he knew that his girlfriend wouldnt AND when he said, "i could but i just wanted to see if you could do it." that is a major e-go boost for him. he was using you to get what he wanted.
and on top of that, he made up the lies about his friends being there so that he could act all innocent and make you still like him and believe that its not him thats the asshole, but its his firends who are. and notice how quickly that all happened.. he most likely got scared that you would retaliate and tell his girlfriend what he asked you to do and the things he said to you and then he would most likely be dumped.. so he made up a sotry tha his girlfriend was there to..
number 1: make you jealous.
number 2: make you think that his girlfriend was there so it would be "pointless" for you to tell her because she was in on the "joke"
obviously, hes scared and wanted an excuse to talk to you so that he could get pictures of you and use you [as i said before]
but dont feel gross and dirty.. you arent. youre still not fully over him yet and that one little glimmer of hope that he would come back to you made you want to do whatever you could that you thought would guarentee him to want you again. it happens to alot of girls who fall for the wrong guys.. theyll do or say anything the guy wants if theres even a small chance of getting back together or getting together. and guys do it too. but the only thing im going to say is, just dont send pictures. who knows who hes showing it too and who knows who he'll send them too. f hes lying about everything else, he's potentially lying about "deleting" the photos. jsut no pitures. if a guy wants pictures, dont give in. youre stronger than that, i know you are sweetie.
and my advice to you is to just delete him from your phone.. delete his contact information or if you dont want to delete him, rename him as "dont talk to him" or "asshole" or "dont answer" because he is an asshole. you shouldnt talk to him. and you shouldt answer him. he doesnt even deserve anything from you. NOTHING. youre better than him and you can DO so much better than him.
and if you really want to get him back, i would say tell his girlfriend what went down.. but this may cause alot of drama and lies [that he will tell] so if you want to avoid all of that, then dont do it.. but its just a siggestion. but if youd like to tell him off for what he did to you, i say go for it. hes stupid and thinks your gullible, which youre not. just tell him to leave you alone an eff off.
then move on and be happy you will never have to deal with him again, and leave that to his girlfriend or any of his future girlfriends. hes the guys we try to avoid, and im so sorry he did this to you. he is honestly the biggest jerk ever. you dont deserve any of that, youre an awesome person. and i promse that soon enough, youll be back to your normal, happy, self.
good luck ! hope i helped, and you kow the drill.. if you need anything else, im here :] xxo.

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One of my friends is going through a tough time because this week is the anniversary of one of her best friends death. i feel like im not prepared to help her. Do you have any suggestions?

aw man, thats really tough, im sorry :[ but ill tell you this much right now, everyone is different. everything affects a person differently. so ill give you a few options to try to help her. youll be prepared. you sound like a really caring person and an awesome friend to care this much about helping her out.. :]

- dont avoid the topic. avoiding it will only make it worse because she'll keep her thoughts inside. its good to re-live the past and things like this, because it is a time where she should feel free and okay to cry or let her emotions out. that was her best friend who died, she was probably a very important part of her life that is no longer there. talking about it helps, avoiding it doesnt.
- after talking about it, or letting her know that she can talk about it with you.. try to do something fun :] because asking her what she wants to do will probably just lead to her saying, "i dont know." and get her all sad. you need to uplift her spirits :] you could suggest doing something in memory of her friend and be like, "lets live it up for [your friends best friends name here] she would have wanted us to." and then maybe suggest going to the movies or walking around the mall, acting goofy, trying on dresses and stuff.. just being goofy. go out to eat.. get icecream.. just have a good time :] or try to. make her laugh as much as possible too. and if you decide to see a movie or something, dont go to any sad ones or with people dying in it. do something funny. or maybe even rent a funny movie like the hangover haha.
- bake stuff, like cakes or cupcakes or cookies and with icing, put her best friends name on it.. with hearts and smiley faces :] or you could even not write her name and just have fun decorating.. taking he rmind off of stuff. but dont forget, always tell her that she can cry or talk to you at ANY time. oh and while doing this.. play some REALLY pump up music :] nothing sad or gloomy.
- just do things she enjoys. act normal. and if she wants to talk, let her. make sure you have a tissue box handy :]

but honestly, dont worry. i know how it feels to be in your position. and it might seem like youre so unprepared, but really, youre not. you KNOW how to handle it.. and when the time comes, you WILL be able to handle it. shes your friend, not some fragile life-source :] dont sweat it. youll help her through this tough time. youve been with her since the beginning of this, just promise her that youll be here for her until the end.
dont worry :] good luck ! hope i helped, and you can always get at me through my inbox ! xxo.

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Is it bad to feel lonely. I just lost a few of my freinds, (backstabbing) and i feel like everyone just gangs up on me and treats me like I'm absolutely nothing. I'm just depressed. I dont't know. What should I do?

:[ i know how you feel.
and yes, thats SO cliche to say, and you're probably like, "yeah right." but its true. i have been screwed over SO many times, and ive been backstabbed even more than that. my ENTIRE life people have let me down and gone behind my back and all that sort of stuff. i cant even tell you how many times ive felt absolutley alone.. ive lost friends and changed friends so many times and unfortunatley, that lead people to gang up on me and think things about me that arent true. people treat me like im absolutley nothing too, and ive been harassed.. ridiculed.. its not fair, and im sorry you have to go through this because i CAN relate; and its not bad to feel lonely. it really isnt. sometimes, its healthy for yourself to feel lonely because it gives you a sense of want.. you can FEEL things and you want to NOT be alone. realizing this is probably the best thing for you, because people who are always surrounded by friends and family and such usually dont experience how it feels to be lonely, therefore they wont know how to handle it.
you will.
and i have been depressed before too. but i never let it get bad. but if you're becoming really depressed, you need to go see a therapist or someone who can help you. and dont feel ashamed to ask for help and talk about your feelings with a total stranger, because its HEALTHY and will help :]
but i also think you should let it be. dont talk to those people.. just hold your head up high and never let anyone bring you down. youre better than them, dont let them get to you. write down how you feel.. maybe in a journal or in the form of poetry of some sort. draw, scream, sing, run, go for walks, listen to empowering music. but you have to look on the brightside.. these girls are going to end up being known as the "haters" and people will eventually see their true colors, karam is a beeyotch. but also.. stand up for yourself ! most people would say ignore it, but i say face it. thats how i am. im very confrontational, and i always feel better after ive stood up for myself. dont let people walk over you, but i still say you should let it go after time and then go talk to new people. make new friends.. it sounds hard, but its really easy :] and if one day those girls decide to apologize to you, then so be it. but until then, theyre not worth your time. you deserve more.. you deserve better.
good luck :] be yourself and never forget that you are SOMEONE. youre not nothing. dont let them make you think that youre less than awesome :] hope i helped, and if you need anyting else, feel free to inbox me, xxo.

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Well you answered my question about my niece's birthday party. The answers were great, but i just wanted to know if you had anymore ideas you could give me. Thanks again in advanced!

of course ! :] here's some more..

- crayola birthday party: obviously, its all about coloring and crayola stuff [which is an easy and cheap brand to get from any local store] and the invitations could say something like, "you can color me happy if you attend my crayola birthday party!"

- cupcake decorate party: make cupcakes for each girl, and get decoratrions to put on it, so they can all have their own personalized cupcake ! but the birthday girl will get candles [and maybe even her own cake] you can get icing, sprinkles.. all the works ;] the invitations could say, "dont be late, we need to decorate!..."

- Carnival/circus party: you can get things like, guess how many skittles are in the jar, and such. maybe some animal crackers.. pin the nose on the clown or tail on the donkey.. :] your invitations could say.. "come join the carnival/circus fun!"

- Fairy Birthday party: "twinkle twinkle little star, we will be the prettiest fairies by far, so come to my party and lets have fun!"

- Scavenger Hunt: "lets have some birthday fun and try to find the surprises! will you help me?!"

- Face Painting Party: the adults would have to do this :] haha, but its tons of fun, and the kids love dressing up afterwards and looking at themselves in the mirror.. it brings alot of giggles :] and maybe they coulkd paint pictures or something.. a painting party !

hope i helped, or gave you some more inspiration :] good luck ! xxo.

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My niece is turning three years old and my sister is going to throw her a birthday party. My sister wants an original birthday party. What we have so far is a safari party and bumblebee party. Any suggestions would be helpful. Also maybe something to put on the invitations to go with the theme. Thanks in advanced!

awww cute :] i have a bunch of ideas [in my highschool, i teach 3-5 year olds for a class, and we throw parties and stuff :)]

- alice in wonderland party: you can have a wacky tea party for one part of the birthday party :] the invitations could say something like, "dont be a madhatter, lets celebrate [your nieces name here] birthday with some chatter! or maybe even.. "dont be late, its a very important date!"

- Butterfly Birthday: you could had decorations with butterflies and the invitations could say something like, "come fly away with me at my birthday party!"

- Cowgirl Birthday Party: the invitations could say, "its time for a hoedown! so strap on those boots and giddy up to this birthday fun!"

- Flower Power Party: Lifes a garden, dig it :] hahaa.

- Fairy Tale Party: Once upon a time there was a little girl [name here] her birthday is on [insert date here] shes inviting you to celebrate this magical day with her!

- Tropical Party: you can get little hula skirts and hawaiian flowers. little girls seem to love dancing in these skirts and having fun :] you could say, "hula on over and join the paradise fun, lets hope for some sun!"

- Ocean Party: [fish and stuff like that, it can be pink glitter fish !] your invitations could say, "dive into {her name here} birthday!"

hope i helped ! if you need any other ideas, i have a bunch, so feel free to inbox me :] xxo. good luck ! i hope she has a wonderful birthday.

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