StarryNightSkies's advice column

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Q: alright well i have a lump in the back of my throat and i felt it to see what it was and it feels like a bone inside of my throat, it dosnt hurt or anything it just feels like a peice food is stuck or something, i'm kinda paniking so if anyone has any seriouse advice please answer thank you

This could be streap throat... do you see white specks on the back of your throat??? if so then you should see a doctor.. in the mean time try gargeling with salt water

Q: I know that I can sing really well when no one's around, but I'm too shy to sing like that when someone is listening. How do I get over this? (PS, I recorded myself, so I know that I can sing well. I don't even sing like that in choir.)

i suggest you have someone you are really close to or you feel really close to to be your audiance...if you cant do it at first turn the lights off and close your eyes and pretend noone is there then eventually you can keep adding more people to your audiance!!

Q: I just got my period today. It sucks because these cramps are killing me and I feel like I want to die. What can I do so the cramps don't hurt as much? I know they sell pills or medicines or something but I don't know where they sell them or what they are called. Any excersizes or something I can eat? The only thing I know about is a heating pad, which I'm already using and it's helping a little bit, but not much. Any help would be appreciated.

Yeah i know how you feel!

For cramps i take Midol teen formula (you can buy it from CVS or Rite aid.. its over the counter so you can buy it from pretty much anywhere)

For what to eat banana's have lots of potassium so it helps ease cramps... if you don't like banana's plain (like me) i like to eat them with cereal or cut it up and put it on toast with peanut butter... if you don't like peanut butter or are allergic to it then you could also mash the banana and spread it on the toast.

I also like to take a hotttt bath and when i get out i like to get my heating pad and put that on and curl up in fetal position...

if you don't have a heating pad some drug stores carry disposable ones or if you don't feel like buying them over and over again you can make one easily! This can bring out the crafty side of you.

to make one you need a lot of cloth like an old pillow case a pound of uncooked white rice a sewing needle and thread... to make this more fun you can also go to wal-mart and buy some fleece fabric for a cover... you might also need a velcro

first you want to cut your pillow case to a resonable size that will hold about a pound of rice mine is 9 x 4 inches but you want to beable to make it like a pouch...

next sew up all but one side... in the one side fill it with the uncooked rice... next you want to sew it up and your ready to use it! what you do is microwave it for about 2-3 minutes... if you wanna add the fun cover to it you cut your fleece to easily fit the filled rice bag
sew up 3 of the 4 sides and put velcro along the last side to make it easy to take it out...

when you microwave it make sure you take the fleece cover off

HOPE THIS HELPED!!

Q: me and my gf broke up like 3 weeks ago but we still hang out sometimes. we were watching a movie and when it was over we started makin out and so i stopped real quick and was like, "we're still friends, okay?" and she didnt say anything so i kept kissin her but she wasnt kissing me back and she started crying so i kinda just left. we've talked since then but why was she crying??? did i do the right thing??? what should i have done if i didnt??? what do i do now???

she probably thought she had a chance again with you and then when you asked are we still friends just crushed it... i say if you still like her then ask her out again but if you don't then don't go making out with her making her think that she has a chance... or if you still wanna do stuff with her then ask her about maybe being friends with benefits...

Q: i have to baby sit 2 kids. ages 6 and 9. my parents are best friends with their parents so my mom doesn't want me charging them a lot because our families are really close and they live next door. they are pretty good kids - if you put them in front of a tv they're perfectly quiet for 2 hours. how much should i charge an hour for the both of them?

i rate

since they are so close i think it would be good for 3-5 dollars an hour or you could always ask them whatever they feel comfortable giving you!

Q: I babysit an 11 year old boy and an 11 year old girl 3 days a week for 4 hours a day. The boy is very sweet, but the girl is a brat. She doesn't listen to me and always does mean stuff to me. She has poured water down my shirt and refused to help with stuff. She trys to make my job very difficult. I don't know why, since I'm very nice to her and I try to help her and do what she wants to do. My family is in a lot of debt so we need the money a lot. What should I do?

I think you should give her 2 warnings and on the third one take her to a place where you want her time out to be... like maybe in a room facing the wall or on the steps try not to pick a place where there are a lot of toys for her to play with because the point of it is thinking what she did wrong

talk to her in a FIRM voice get down to her level and look her in the eye. if she turns away turn her back twords you and hold her shoulders but dont do it in a controling way like you want to hurt her because that isn't good.

Warnings:
1)Don't do that again
2)If i tell you one more time
3)tell her what he did wrong and take her to a time out place and tell her he has to stay there for 11 minutes (1 minute for every year old they are)

make sure to check back every few minutes with out her noticing like you can casually walk by

if she actually stays in her time out place then go back after 11 minutes and tell her what he did wrong and tell her if she does it again you will tell her parents and she will be in BIG trouble

hope this helps!!!

Q: Ok,I'm 13(gal)and i babysit 2 boys 3 times a week for about 4 hrs. There 1-1/2 & 6 yrs. old the 6 yr.old will NOT listen, i tell him not to do something and he still does it. Every time i have a problem i tell the dad when he gets home,but he never does anything.I have been babysitting for around 3 years and I've never run into this problem before. I'm thinking about starting a discipline plan.If he acts up i will tell him to go to his room,if he doesn't do that I'll tell him were not going outside that day etc.(i say what i mean and mean what i say).Then if it still doesn't work after a few days I'll tell his mom i cant babysit him anymore.I just cant handle him.I just need to know if other babysitters like me think this sounds good. thanks.

I think you should give him 2 warnings and on the third one take him to a place where you want his time out to be... like maybe in a room facing the wall or on the steps try not to pick a place where there are a lot of toys for him to play with because the point of it is thinking what he did wrong

talk to him in a FIRM voice get down to his level and look him in the eye. if he turns away turn him back twords you and hold his shoulders but dont do it in a controling way like you want to hurt him because that isn't good.

Warnings:
1)Don't do that again
2)If i tell you one more time
3)tell him what he did wrong and take him to a time out place and tell him he has to stay there for 6 minutes (1 minute for every year old they are)

make sure to check back every few minutes with out him noticing like you can casually walk by

if he actually stays in his time out place then go back after 6 minutes and tell him what he did wrong and tell him if he does it again you will tell his parents and he will be in BIG trouble

hope this helps!!!

Q: I'm babysitting this demand child. How can i get her to shut up?! Omg. shes so annoying. please help
♥

Research and study...
find out what kind of things she like and find some quiet things around the house... like a puzzle or movie...

Pick out two things and do this

(her name) you have the choice of (this game) or (this movie) and if she doesn't want either than say if you don't choose one and you are going to throw a fit then you are going to your room or sit on the step for (this many minutes) (if it is day time) or go to bed (if its night time)

Q: hey, ive been trying to babysit my neighbor forever. my mom has been asking them for me to babysit. i mean im going into the 8th grade.. im deffinetly old enough by now. shouldnt there be a reason why there avoiding it?

Maybe they don't think or old enough or Immature and not responsable. They might not trust you with their kid. Or maybe they have another babysitter or just don't need one yet.... they could also think that you are too needy and not reponsable enough because you were having your mom ask instead of confronting them and asking yourself.

Q: if u r babysitting wut r the phone #s u should have on hand

like umm dunno. ok 911. um pest control? no..um posion something or other?

i should know how to do first aid right? btw what is first aid - like help a choking person with the heimlich manuever and like CPR??

You should have :
The Parent's cell numbers
The number of the place the parents will be at
A neighbor's Number
Poison Control
obviously 911
and the number of a hospital near by

you should know first aid.... for babies and children there are different heimlic maneuvers than for adults so you would need to learn them also first aid is treating injuries...

you should also have a list of allergies and medicines they could use... make sure you know where their fire extinguisher is, flashlights, band aids and stuff you think you might need incase of an emergancy

Q: I want to start babysitting again so I'm making a flyer. I only babysit for kids who are potty trained. How do I put that on a flyer and still sound professional?

Personally if I read a flyer for my kids saying babysits kids who are only potty trained i would think of that as someone who doesn't know what they are doing because they don't know how to change a diaper.... but thats just me i would just want the best care for my kids and most people do

you could just put
I only baby sit potty trained children
or
babysits (ususally 3 will be a good age) 3-(whatever age)

Q: I lose my temper a lot when i am babysitting. I am making good money, but this girl is so annoying. I dont get that mean, but I just want to tell her to SHUT UP. I try to be nice and act interested in what she is saying, but she drives me crazy!

Does that make me a bad babysitter?

I would just tell her to take some quiet time and watch tv or draw or do a puzzle or something quiet. just dont loose your temper because she could tell her parents and you could loose your job.

Q: I'm watching my friends kitten from saturday to wednesday. I'm going to have to keep it at MY house. I have to feed it, play with it, and all that stuff. How much should I charge?

It is kind of rude to ask for money from a friend that you are doing a favor for... you cant always expect money for doing a good deed. I work with animals and it is not good to play with them when they are being moved into a new home it is too stressful for them and it will make them sick expecially since it is a kitten and it is still young. So unless it comes to you wanting to play then give it that attention. other than that i would just feed it and change its littler dont really mess with it too much because you dont want it to get sick.

Q: Hey my name is Rachel and iam 17 years old and I think my 13 year old cousin tiffany might have anorexia and iam really worried.my cousin tiffany weighs 100lbs and is only 5 foot tall and thinks she's fat all of her family including myself try to tell her she's not fat,but she dosn't listen right now she's going on a diet in which she only eats one meal a day and iam really worried is this crash dieting and these meals are mabey like a bowl of soup or something is she anorexic?please help me.my cousin and I are like sisters even if she is only 13 and iam 17 age dosn't matter how do I get her help?

for being 5 foot tall and being 100 pounds and only 13 that doesn't sound bad at all... i am 16 5'8 (8 inches taller than her) and 112 pounds and the doctor said that i was at a good weight for my height and age... so she is probably a good weight and height too. But her saying she is fat is a problem just keep telling her she looks great the way she is and she would look gross if she were any skinnier. Try and make her foods that are high in protien and that she likes.

Q: my uncle just passed away a little over a month ago on his motorcycle at the age of 20. i need a really good song or poem about death. songs i already have are ..

carry on by tim mcgraw
time for me to fly by REO speedwagon
the dance by garth brooks
please remember me by tim mcgraw
slipped away by avril lavigne

i would really like some poems though.

thanks in advanced

I am sorry about your loss my dad died when i was 5 so i know how you feel if you ever want to talk about it my screen name is OH FAKE A SMiLE getting back to your question i like the song ill be missing you by diddy also i like the song changes by tupac even though its not really that much about death just hardships in life

Q: Well, every single day, i'm left all alone at my house. My mom goes to work, and my brother is at camp, and my other brother is in the army.

Since i cant get a job, and my friends can never hang out, i was wondering, what are some fun things that I can do while i'm alone.

maybe you can ride your bike, take a walk. ususally i like to go to www.bored.com or www.ebaumsworld.com and play games and read cool stuff. maybe you could get a job like babysitting around the neighborhood that way it gives you something to do and it pays.

hope this helps
if you wanna chat or need help then you can IM me on AIM ... my screen name is OH FAKE A SMiLE

Q: 14/f

Ok, before I give you the actual question, I'm going ot give you the background.

Here it goes,
It started yesterday, it was my dad and I, watching Jeapordy, and he was making fun of all the contestants, so I hit him in the arm, but then he hit me back, I don't think he realized how hard he hits, but it's very hard. So I hit him back again, and so on, and so on. But at one point he slapped/hit my leg so hard that it left a huge hand print, and I got so mad. My mom wasn't home at the time, I tried contacting her, but she didn't answer. So I took a picture of the mark. It was ok, after that, seeing how I got out of the house for a couple of hours with my friends.Then he and my brother, came to pick me up, we decided to go rent a movie. After that was over, this is going to sound childish, but we were arguing over who got the front seat. And my dad always takes his side, so I was frustrated, so frustrated, that when I got in the back, I said "I hate you both". My dad went "Hate is an awfuly strong word." Then I went "Fine I loathe you, I despise both of you." And it was a quiet car ride after that. When we got home, I had a serious attitude, and my mom wanted to know why. That's when I showed her the picture of my leg[from earlier]. She got really mad, and started hitting my dad. Since I was just as mad, I went upstairs to cool off, and watch the movie I had chosen. When it was over, I wasn't quite as mad, and we[my brother, dad and I] watched the other movie. That was fine.

But, when I woke up this morning, I woke up an hour late, so I jumped in the shower, and while I was in there, my dad comes in and goes "Your too late, Your too late." I have no idea why, but it irritated me. So I snapped back at him; "I can still take a shower!". After I got out, my mom came in and started telling me, that she was going to leave my dad, that we don't get along, and she's leaving us both behind. She asked if I deserved the hit on the leg. Then she goes that stunt you pulled, really screwwed things up.[Refering to showing her the picture, to get my dad in trouble.] And I wasn't allowed to go, where I had planned on going. So I slept. When I woke up, my dad was leaving for work, and he said "Bye." I said "Bye." And he goes, "I hope your happy." And as I sit here now, I can't help, but believe that I was responsible for my family falling apart. My parents have been otgether since they were 14, and I feel as though I ruined it all. That I was some sort of mistake. And I don't know what to do. Does anyone know how I can fix things? I'm feeling very depressed right now,and I have no idea what I'm going to do.

Thanks for anyone who tries.

I think that if they really loved each other and everything was fine until the picture thing then they wouldn't let that come between them. Your parents were probably just using it as an excuse to hide their problems. Just tell your mom that what you did just came out of anger and that you probably deserved it for hitting him first.

i really hope this helps if you ever need to talk or have questions just IM me on AIM my screen name is OH FAKE A SMiLE

Q: ok so my mom is an alcoholic and shes gotton 2 DUI's and she's gotton in a drinking and driving accident and shes gone to rehab and goes to alot of AA meetings but she still drinks aout oncce or twice a week and the only peoeple in my house is my mom and my little sister and me, since my dad died of cancer a few years ago. and since im the oldest i have responsibilty for the family since my mom cant really take care of me and my sister. i really want to talk to her and try to live a normal life but i dont know how. i just need advice on what your opinion would be on waht i should do.

I am sorry that you have to deal with all the stress you should find out if there is a relative you should stay with then tell your mom that you and your sister are going to move out until she checks herself into a 24/7 rehab center and when she is cured you will come back. i know what its like to not have a dad my dad also died of cancer

hope this helps

Q: my dad left my mom about 3 years ago.. I don't hang out with him or anything.. and when I see my friends with their dads having a good time..I always get jealous and wished i had a dad to have a good time with..I also watch shows and get jealous to..what can I do to not get jealous of people cause they have a dad and I don't? It ain't no way I'm spending time with my father.. I don't like him..

Hey i know what it's like not to have a dad. My dad died when i was 5 and i get jealous a lot too. just tell your friends to lay back on talking about their dad's so much because you dont ever get to see yours. they should understand where you are coming from and that it hurts you.

Q: So my dad tells me how nobody in reality is going to respect me because i have a tongue ring. I thought respecting somebody wasnt because of how they look [as in having a tongue ring] and because i have 17 piercings. I swear he is embarassed of me and he wants like the perfect little daughter or something

Ew. he makes me so mad. blahh

Don't worry about it just as long as you respect them they should respect you!! If they don't respect you just because of some holes in your body then screw them. I kind of felt that people would look at me differently when i got my nose peirced but that didn't change at all. I was talking to my friends mom about it and she said

"i dont think anyone would think of you as a bad person just because you have your nose peirced because you are polite and you look adults in the eye when you are talking to them and being talked to"

so as long as you do that you should be respected!

hope this helps