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babysitting blues :(
Ok,I'm 13(gal)and i babysit 2 boys 3 times a week for about 4 hrs. There 1-1/2 & 6 yrs. old the 6 yr.old will NOT listen, i tell him not to do something and he still does it. Every time i have a problem i tell the dad when he gets home,but he never does anything.I have been babysitting for around 3 years and I've never run into this problem before. I'm thinking about starting a discipline plan.If he acts up i will tell him to go to his room,if he doesn't do that I'll tell him were not going outside that day etc.(i say what i mean and mean what i say).Then if it still doesn't work after a few days I'll tell his mom i cant babysit him anymore.I just cant handle him.I just need to know if other babysitters like me think this sounds good. thanks.
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I think you should give him 2 warnings and on the third one take him to a place where you want his time out to be... like maybe in a room facing the wall or on the steps try not to pick a place where there are a lot of toys for him to play with because the point of it is thinking what he did wrong
talk to him in a FIRM voice get down to his level and look him in the eye. if he turns away turn him back twords you and hold his shoulders but dont do it in a controling way like you want to hurt him because that isn't good.
Warnings:
1)Don't do that again
2)If i tell you one more time
3)tell him what he did wrong and take him to a time out place and tell him he has to stay there for 6 minutes (1 minute for every year old they are)
make sure to check back every few minutes with out him noticing like you can casually walk by
if he actually stays in his time out place then go back after 6 minutes and tell him what he did wrong and tell him if he does it again you will tell his parents and he will be in BIG trouble
hope this helps!!!
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i think that your doing the right thing as a babysitter. if this happens again, deffinatly tell his mom that it's not working out and you cant babysit for him anymore.
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Try a reward chart. Tell him if he is good he will get extra playtime or whatever. Make homemade playdough or other activities for him to do to keep himself occupied. Take him outside and let him run all of that extra energy off, so when he gets inside he will hopefully calm down. If he acts up, send him to the "naughty chair". Treat him as a young child (even 1 and a half, like his sibling) and tell him until he can act his age he is going to keep getting treated this way. Make sure you show him respect, though, because he needs to learn that it goes both ways. Don't threaten with telling the parents if the parents aren't going to do anything about it. Just make sure he doesn't get "fun time" when you are there if he can't listen. If it continues, tell the parents you can't babysit anymore. Good luck.
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My gosh, this sounds exactly like my neighbor! He never listened to a word I said and he even threw stuff at me.
Turns out, the kid had a learning disorder. I talked to his parents about how I didnt think that I could babysit for him anymore because he never listened to a word I said. Before this I constantly made up excuses. I hated having to do that. In the end, I just asked his mom what type of punishments they had for him.
So I would suggest talking to the parents...ask them what to do when hes bad and stick to it! If it gets really bad, just tell them that you cant babysit for them anymore. You shouldnt have to fight with a 6 year old, he should respect you.
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make deals. Say if you eat all your veggies we'll play tag. Every babysitta sooner or later is gonna have to disiplne the kids (to test u) so bring activities! Cards, etc.
P.S. Try to see how the kids parents teach 'em. They may be abusing him. That's why his dad didn't do anything.. maybe until u left.
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Give him a reward system, If he behaves badly, say "If you keep this up you get no cookie". Small children are very gullible yet naiive. If he keeps up the attitude, tell him he can't have any dessert. You could also tell him for evry hour he behaves nicely he can have a cookie.
Also, the other advice given is true. Don't yell, just say what you need to say softly and it will get the child to listen. Screaming will just make him try to ignore you.
Be firm, but nice. Don't yell at him, or ground him to his room. Try to negotiate with him or give him a reward system.
And occupying him works well, too. Find a hobby he likes or you both like, and stick with it. Rent a movie he has been dying to watch, or get a game that's family-fun for him to play.
Also understand the Psychology of a young child. He/she reacts differently at home, school, and different people. The child may behave nicely to his parents but not-so-good to you. So also try saying something like, "If you keep this up I'll call your mother/father and tell he/she how you're acting."
I had the same problem when I babysat. There will always be times when children won't cooperate, so negotiate, reward, and firmly discipline them.
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When you talk to him no matter how mad he makes you don't yell. The lower your voice is the more he has to listen and he will feel more compelled to listen. Try to keep him busy with different activities: Coloring, playing cars,etc. Make sure you do these activities with him. He is just trying to cry out for attention. If his parents aren't doing anything about what you tell them then the kid probally isn't getting as much attention as he needs. Try not to get mad at him and try to understand what he is going through. He just wants a friend. If you stop babysitting then he will feel really bad, when right now he might need someone to talk to. It is harder for kids to talk to someone so he is acting out. It know I might sound crazy but I know. I have babysat a bunch of kids before, and I have 2 sisters and 3 brothers all younger then me. You might get frusterated but the less anger or frustration you show him even in facial expressions or sending him to his room etc. the more he will learn to respect you. It will just take time, and remember he might be going through a hard time right now even if he is only six.
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You've got the right idea. I have a home daycare, I take care of 7 kids between the ages of 8 months and 8 years. I know how you feel!
You need to be firm. The 6 year old walks all over you because he can. Take a stand, be firm. Find a good time out spot. A place where he can sit down in a corner- no TV, no other kids, no distractions. He needs to go to time out for 6 minutes (1 minute per year of age). Set a timer. If he cries, tell him he can't come out until he is done. Be firm and serious. Don't send him to his room...too many things for him to do in there. He needs to feel like he is being punished, not rewarded.
Next time he acts up, give him 2 warnings. Then firmly send him to time out. This will take time to get used to, for both of you. Be patient. I promise it will pay off. After he has served his time, talk about it- tell him why he was there.
After the first few times, he won't wanna go back there and eventually all you will have to do is threaten it.
It works for me!
Good luck!
Jamie
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I babysit too. What you have to do is take away something that he wants. Lets say he's doing something like throwing pillows and you tell him to stop.. Say "If you don't stop and your going to go to your room." ..and if he doesn't stop take the pillow away and put him in his room. Another example..lets say that he wants something (food..toys..to play) but he isn't being good..don't give it to him. This is what i do and it always work..they get mad and start crying but they will get over it. A dicipline plan is perfact! Good luck! :)
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well the room is a bad idea for a time out place. i learned that on supernanny because that is the one place they should feel secure and no punished.. like their own places
i would make just a time out spot and start taking away privledges like video games and desserts until he listens and get him involved in things he likes so he doesnt have time to be bad.
there is a little boy i babysit and he is also pretty bad. the only thing you can do is not let him see that you are cracking.. alls he is doing is testing you. and you have to be strong to get through it
i would guess he is just getting bored. maybe you can try baking or something that takes a while and will keep him entertained. like get cookie cutters and everything
either way i would tell his mon because moms are more sentive about that than dads
also becareful if you take away like outdoor play time because he might act up more.
here is what i would do
if he is bad
make him sit in the chair by the steps or whatever for 5 mins without getting up then before he gets up and must say sorry (and acually say it not say are you sorry) then let him have his privilage back (outdoor time desserts etc)
also if you cant handle it anymore what i do is because there are 3 of them and i usually dont have time to attend to him the whole time i let him go as long as he isnt harming anything or himself.
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i go through the same problem EVERY time i babysit. i have to babysit two girls 2 & 4 and they just CANNOT share with each other and they fight a lot. but what you need to do is not neccesarily yell at them, because that can upset them, you just need to be stern. like look at them with a VERY serious face and like point your finger and say like "i'm serious right now, i need you to STOP ______ (whatever he is doing wrong)" it should work. if is doesn't then when the dad comes home you should ask him how he wants you to handle the situation. if the dad refuses to help then you should try talking to their mom and maybe she could help. you could even try talking to your parents and see what they think you should do.
GOOD LUCK! and just remember...your getting paid to do this :]
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that is actually a really good way to deal with him. but MAKE SURE that you talk to his parents about what you are going to do first. because if this kid says you did something to him(after you leave). and lies about what really happened, or makes that fact that you stuck him in his room something horrible, YOU will get in trouble with the parents. talk to them about you plans, so when the kid complains, you wont get into trouble. also, dont be afraid to shout at him! just be carefull you dont make him burst into horrible tears lol. do what you have to do it's ok
hope i could help
take care and good luck
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make jello with him
its fun and he'll like it
and then have him try to eat in through a straw
it'll take him a while, and he cant do anything while hes trying to do it (like talk or be obnoxious)
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