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Gender:

Female

Location:

Kansas

Occupation:

House wife, Mother, Local Loon

Age:

35

Member Since:

July 15, 2006

Answers:

3333

Last Update:

March 11, 2013

Visitors:

125058

Favorite Columnists

hitler_the_goat

about

I'm a mother of 2 boys who are 13 months apart. Talk about a handful. I'm a wife to the best husband I could have ever dreamed of.
I'm one of the very blessed.

I have Bipolar 1 Disorder. I hate taking all these medications and always going to doctors appointments, but life is too short to let mental illness get the better of me.

Often times life is a challenge, and nobody knows that better than me. I wake up wondering if this is going to be a day my illness overpowers my meds, and either sends me flying like a bat out of hell, or leaves me laying on the couch like a wet dish rag.

Thank all that is good in the world that I have an excellent support system at home.
I'm one of the lucky ones.

I'm honest, and that can either be a perk or s flaw. Depends on how you choose to look at it.
I like to see it as a perk, because it's better to hear the truth than to be told candy coated bullshit.

advice

I hooked up with this guy in early January. We haven't talked since-except for a simple "hi." We were friends before. Tomorrow is our dance and people have told me he is going to try adn hook up with me again. I will admit, I wouldn't mind it cause I liked hoking up with him before. BUt I don't want to be his hook up buddy either. Should I just not hook up with him even though I wouldn't mind it? Or what?

My opinion? Though you wouldn't mind this hook up, why do you want to disrespect your own feelings for it? You said you don't want to be his hook up buddy, so don't be.

Think of it this way- how did it make you feel after this happened the last time? Used, maybe? Yah. Probably because, used, you were. To do it again would just bring back all of those feelings. It's not worth it.

Save it for a guy who wants to be with you for more than just an occasional hook up.

Hi Im 16 and I was wondering how to increase my boyfriends stamina who is also 16. We have really amazing sex but I want to know how he can last longer than 30 min to an hour. oh also would using a condom help increase stamina sense it is less sensitive? I dont need a lecture about unprotected sex. I am on the pill and we lost our virginity to each other. Thanks!

Condoms do tend to decrease sensitivity, so that may help. But I'm telling you this- feel lucky. Most guys that age can't last 2 minutes.

i've had my license two months.
today, i turned left on RED.
:(
i have trouble telling left and right sometimes
i know, i'm 16. i dont know whyyyy.
so i wasn't thinking. all i did was look for cars. no cars were coming.
i made the turn.
when the turn was finished, i realized that i had just turned LEFT. :(
do you think im going to get a ticket in the mail?
IM SOOO WORRIED.
unbelieveably worried.
please help.

If they have the traffic cameras on the light poles, then it is possible you may get a ticket. Don't worry too much; we all make mistakes.

Assuming you live in the US, try to remember that a left hand turn ALWAYS crosses traffic. Remember that when crossing traffic, you must ALWAYS go on green, never on red.

Also, you can make a right hand turn on a red light if the way is clear, unless otherwise posted.

I have never been too good when it comes to math and science. In geography, reading, and english I make all A's. With math, it's normally a B or C. In science my average is probably about a low B also. I don't see anything wrong with a B, but my school uses something called mygradebook.com and everytime my father goes on it to see my grades and it's below an A on anything...he yells at me and grounds me. I've tried explaining to him that I'm doing my best, but he either grounds me or yells at me till I'm in tears. I have a tutor, I study, I DO EVERYTHING! What can I do to get him to stop and realize that I'm trying my best?

I don't know that there is much you can do. You have tried explaining to him already, and to no avail. He obviously can't see that you are already doing the best you can, and you can only push yourself so far.

Parents can be weird sometimes. He probably sees it as he thinks you can do so much better if you applied yourself more, but you KNOW it as you are already applying yourself to the max. He is probably trying to push you to be successful, but doesn't realize that you already are.

What he fails to realize, is that you need to make good grades for YOU, not for him. Not everyone can make all A's all the time, and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. In my opinion, if it matters at all, your grades are just fine.

I know I'm not much help to you, but all I can say is keep doing your best. Try not to let him frustrate you. When he yells at you, try to let it go in one ear and out the other. If you start taking all of his hurtful comments to heart, you could end up with a complex of thinking that doing all that you can is never good enough.

Hello everyone. I'd like to sing "Taylor the Latte Boy" at my High Schools Spring program. However, I dunno where I could find the music for it. I know music is available because I've seen another girl perform it at another high school. I don't need the music for like another month but I'd like to be prepared. Can anyone help me?
Just a side note, I can't order anything online, I just can't.

You may be able to get it at a music store (the kind that sells instruments). They deal in sheet music for bands and choirs, so surely they can find what you are looking for. If they don't have it on hand, they can probably order it in for you.

in 2 weeks i'm turning 16 and i want to have some sort of small party. I'm inviting 6 people. I don't have a lot of money to spend on this (let's say, my limit is $100).
My parents suggested all night bowling (midnight until 3:30), the only problem is that the guys can't come back to my house after that, my dad won't let them. (there'll be two guys).

does anyone have any other suggestions?

Maybe you could have something like a swimming party earlier in the evening so everyone can return to your house. Of course, since it is winter, not an outdoor party, but maybe you can rent the indoor pool at a local rec center, such as the YMCA? That shouldn't be very expensive.

how can i get rid of a sore throat with out medican or perioxide or salt water. i tried all them and i still havent go rid of it :/

I know you said no medicine, but have you tried Chloraseptic throat spray? It doesn't get rid of the sore throat, but, when used as directed, it numbs the pain until your throat heals. I don't know of any ways to make a sore throat just go away. It takes a little time to heal.

If you have it for a week or more you should think of going to see your doctor.

I like this boy lets call his Cam. and Cam. said he lkes me and a girl lets call her clair and he likes us both and i told Cam i liked him and Clair doesnt like him at all but he still seems to like her better and i've tried alot of things he talks to me alot and we talk so much it seems he wants to be just friends!! help me please,
Massie

You can't change his feelings any more than you can change the past. If you can live with being just his friend, then do that. He may make a great buddy. If you can't live with just being his friend, then move on. There really aren't any other options in this situation.

I have.....i'm just gonna say it i have large boobs and alot of guys flirt with me but i want to know if they like me or my boobs please help me, massie

You are going to get that a lot in life. Guys are into big boobs, there's no two ways around that. That just means there is that much more reason for you to be careful in who you choose to have for a boyfriend. You want to be sure you get a guy who is into you, and not just your chest.

My predicament is pretty complicated, I gotta say. I don't really want flimsy answers or something that's just going to reiterate what I've typed down. Solutions people, I need soluttionnnssss.

Ok. So. To start at the beginning I met this guy. I'm practically the only democrat in my school so when I met him and found out he was a democrat I was more attracted to him. So we've talked for a long time and he's been really nice, and I draw in class and he's taken an interest in my art and all that stupid sappy cheesy CRAP.

But anyway. One day he tells me he's making a Bolshevik's club at my school. I had no idea what the Bolshevik's were; I just assumed it wasn't anything bad because he wasn't a bad person and we seemed to share the same views. He showed me what he wanted, and it was a girl and a boy standing side by side and the arms closest to eachother are raised. The girl is holding a sickle and the boy is holding a hammer-thing, and they're crossing them. So I just agreed and said I'd try and get it done over the weekend.

Well I come home, and decide to do some research on these 'bolsheviks'. Sadly, I came to find they were communists. Communism is not something I believe in. It is an extremely left wing theory where all classes are to be equal. I don't think anybody can excell or live up to their full potential that way. I just don't find it fair, or right.. if we lived in a communist world what would the point of trying be?

So I was naturally appalled that I had agreed to endorse this club with my drawing. But what was I going to do? I still kind of like this guy even if he is a little extreme, but I don't want to support communism with my drawing (the drawing would be used on flyers around my school to support the club)

So, I have to have come to a solution by sunday night, at least.. help me, please?

Correct me if I'm wrong, but you seem to be asking about the drawing?

Here's my input: Allow him to stand up for what he believes in, but you need to give yourself the same respect. If you allow him to use your drawing for something you don't believe in, then you aren't standing up for your own.

You can still like this guy, but no, you don't have to support Communism. If he thinks you do, then, honestly, he isn't worth your time and effort.

So, as for the drawing- I wouldn't do it. It's not your cause, and under ordinary circumstances, you wouldn't want to be a part of it in the slightest. Correct? He will just have to understand your position, and if he don't, it's like I said above, he isn't worth your time and effort. He expects you to respect his views, and he needs to give you the same respect.

Just tell him you are sorry, but at the time you agreed to do this drawing, you didn't realize it was for a club you didn't agree with.

This may be a bit long. Bear with me.

There have been quite a few times my boyfriend and I have had unprotected sex. Well my period is usually like clockwork and right now I'm 10 days late.

Well when I was, I think, 5 days late I went to the doctor and had a pregnancy test done. It was negative. The doctor did say the tests weren't 100% accurate, so that didn't help me out at all.

Well now, I'm 10 days late. I took a pregnancy test last night (The Clearblue Easy Digital Pregnancy Test) and it came back Not Pregnant. I'm still not sure if this thing is right though. Friends of mine said, even though they were like 8 weeks along, tests would still show them as not pregnant. Has anyone else had this happen before?

Lately, I've been having these dull pains in my stomach lately, and sometimes they're really sharp. (Not like cramps at all). I've also been having a lot of discharge (sorry if that's TMI). I actually thought my period had shown up one morning but wasn't the case. My boobs are also sore, especially around the outside and I keep burping a lot (even though I only drink water). My appetite has increased greatly, but I always feel nauseous after I eat. It's strange. I'm not sure what's going on.

Could someone please help me?

Also, when is the best time to take a pregnancy test?

Thanks.
Kayla

It's possible you are just late. Have you been really stressed? Of course, because you think you may be pregnant. Stress can cause your period to come late.

I would say your chances are slim that you are pregnant because you have already had 2 negative tests, however a false negative twice in a row isn't impossible. It may be that you don't have enough of the pregnancy hormone in your urine to read on the test. From what I understand, false negatives are more common than false positives due to what I just told you about the hormone.

Play it safe. Wait for your period to be at least 2 weeks late to ensure the tests read accurately. Try another urine test. Something like EPT. If that comes negative and you are still having doubts, go for a blood test to be certain.

I am pregnant, and I never had symptoms such as cramping or pains in my stomach. Those are actually warning signs during pregnancy. I did have tender breasts and increased appetite. Nausea didn't set in until around 9 weeks of pregnancy. I was very irritable and very fatigued. So I was either a grouch or asleep. When I took my home test, it showed positive in less than 30 seconds, when results could be read in 3 minutes.
HOWEVER, every woman's experience is different. I'm just letting you in on my own experience.

ok my boyfriend has a family reunion at 1:00 so i said i would go because i wanted to meet his dads side of his family...but i told my little cousin i would be on her dodgeball team...and thats at 1:30.....this really blows...i want to go to both...can anyone help me out?

Hmmm... My opinion? You can meet his dad's family another time, because your little cousin may get hurt if you skip out on her. I know this may be an answer you aren't looking for, but between his family and yours, you should keep the plans you had with yours.

Recently i've been envying other people who have like these really cool names. I've been trying to think of what i could do with my name (my name's Donna). But i can't think of anything to do with my name. People normally call me Donz, but i've been called that for ages and i just want something else that people could call me by.

Any1 got any ideas??

Dare to be different. Stand out from the crowd. Use the name your parents gave you. Why do something because everyone else is? That never has ceased to baffle me. Don't be envious. Be proud that your name isn't bad enough to change.

I was going out with this one guy that I really liked for a little over a month. But then he started wanting to know where I was, who I was with, and all that stuff. He called me a million times a day and when I didn't answer his call he'd keep calling until i'd pick up. or he'd leave messages cussing at me asking why the f*** I wasn't answering my cell. Plus, he wanted all my time and if I was busy, he would just ask to come with me and do it too or come with me and my friends. So, I broke up with him.
Now, he calls me still and leaves a million more messages, wants to be "friends" and now he's bugging me even more now then he did when we were going out. He says, "I love you, babe" and all that crap.
should I take it or call the cops or what??
please help me!

What I would do, is save all of the messages. If you are under 18, you need to go to your parents first. And yes, I would talk to the police. This guy definitely sounds like a weirdo, and he would make me feel paranoid and unsafe.

im not eating anymore i weigh 130 pounds and im REALY fat well People say im not fat but i am wat can i do thats quik and easy?

Uh... you need to eat. 130 pounds isn't fat. You should seek professional help before you end up destroying your body. Your body needs food to survive, and if your body can't survive, your weight won't matter anymore.

okay i have no idea what it means when we have to do a conclusion and application like i know the conclusion means to say our results but can someone please explain to me what it means to do an application?!?? and how to do it! ill give 5's

Just for the simple fact that you will give a 5 for an answer, I want to be sure you understand that is ratings abuse. You shouldn't expect to get good advice by saying "I rate 5!" This site isn't intended for us to answer your question based on how you plan to rate us. If any of us are that way, they need to leave. We are here to give advice, and if you don't like it, you need to say as much. Anyone who answers questions just to get a good rating isn't really here to help or give honest advice.

So, to answer your question- LOOK IT UP ON THE INTERNET.

ok u know the guy i dumped for tallon he was just using me !!! and before i dumped him he was hanging out with this girl ignoring me and he said he loved me and now i miss tallon im sooo mad and when i dumped him the girl he was hanging out with they went out after i dumped him and she dumped her bf again for him!

Well, that's the breaks of the game, kid. Now you realize the grass isn't always greener on the other side...

He has moved on. So should you. You dumped him for another guy, so I highly doubt he would trust you enough to take you back. Hard truth, I know, but that is what reality is, sorry to say.

see i like this guys and i have for a very long time, well me and him have kissed and done stuff, but i dotn know if hes using me or not. i mean hes kinda got another girl and he hasnt said anything about gettin rid of her so i think he might be using me but he tells me all this stuff about how he has feelings for me and how hes falling for me and stuff, adn he even told me he loved me. i mean weve had sex, but i dont know if i want to continue having sex or doing stuff with him (sexually) until the other girl is gone, becuase i feel kinda bad for doing stuff when i know the other girl doesnt know about me and i dont wanna feel like awhore. But, i also really really REALLY really like him!!! a LOT!! and i dont wanna lose what we actually do have=] im really confused and i would love some advice. Please HELP ME!!

Hey, here is the hard truth: If he is cheating on a girl with you, he will most likely cheat on you. I would suggest that you realize this guy is a jerk. He is using you for sex. He is lying to you to get sex. If he loved you like he said, he would be devoted to you, and only you. He doesn't really love you- that makes him a liar, period.

Why are you so worried about losing what you do have with him? Because, honestly, you got jack sh*t with him. He's using you, and that isn't anything to want to keep ahold of, and it counts for nothing. He is a user and a liar and he is playing with your mind and your heart in order to get what he wants. You don't deserve that kind of treatment, and he isn't worth a bit of your time and efforts.

Get away from this jerk and save your feelings to give to some one who actually deserves them.

im really body concious and sometimes it gets to the point where i hurt|harm myself. i used to cut and i was annerexic. i am no longer neither but today my boyfriend asked for nude pics. and im 13 but usually i would be like YEAH BRB I NEED TO TAKE SOME. but lately ive just been more depressed than usual. i dont eat much anymore. ive been wanting to cut i even attempted to cut. i havent wanted to kill myself though. i just dont know whats wrong with me. i dont want my mom or dad to know. and i dont want physcological help anymore either. nothing online or in person. i made up a random excuse not to. but its jsut that i can find more flaws in me than good things. i dont even think i do have good things. my question is. what can i do?

You need psychological help, weather you want it or not. I hope that you decide to want it soon before you find yourself trapped back in old habits.

So my boyfriend for almost a month still hasn't told his parents that we are going out. His parents are very strict, but he is 18 and I told him that he should be able to do what he wants. I wish he would tell them because I feel like I am in hiding because I can never call him because his parents are around. What should I do about this problem?
Also what is a good gift to give him for valentines. I was thinking a big card and homemade cookies. Is that to much or do you think that is just right?

Thank You

Give him some time. He may not be ready to tell his parents. It's possible he wants to wait until you've been together for a while. A month isn't very long for him to get to know you as a girlfriend. He'll tell them in time; be patient with him. Don't pressure him about it- that may push him away.

As for the gift, I think it's a good idea. A gift that is made has more thought put into it than something you grab off a shelf.

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