I aim to give you solid advice on your problems. I don't sugarcoat things and I'm always straight up. Don't come asking for what you want to hear as I always give the truth even if you don't want it because it's what you need and the only way to grow.
Gender: Male Member Since: December 31, 2006 Answers: 3591 Last Update: August 30, 2022 Visitors: 133847
Main Categories: Mental health Parenting Doesn't Fit Any Of These Categories View All
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how do i ditch old friends that never make me feel that great and get better new friends? like cause our school has a lot of cliques so how to you like join a clique? or how do you like make friends with people that arent that new.. cause you see them a lot but it would kinda be weird since they already have their friends.. so like would they want me as well? and thanks. 13/f (link)
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Why wouldn't they want you as a friend? You have a great personality, charm, humor and all of those important qualities I'm sure. If you want to make friends with new people just be natural and introduce yourself. That's how friendships can spark.
Also, throw a party and invite people over or invite them bowling etc. with a group. When it comes to the old friends who don't act like friends just stop hanging out. Don't invite them places and don't accept their invites. They'll get the picture soon enough. It's the nicest way of doing this.
People can and do have multiple friends in many different cliques. As long as you are a good person they'll all see it and be clamoring for your friendship.
Why would it be weird? Everyone can use new friends and will include you if they see you're worth hanging around. Just treat making friends with these people like you did before with others. It's not any different.
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I'm 18.. and a virgin..
I've been going out with a guy for a year now...we love eachother alot...
I want to have sex after marriage..
due to religious reasons and also because i think it will be of more value when you have sex for the first time on your first night...
But he wants to have sex before that....
the 1st time i explained my reasons to him he said he understood.. but now he seems to be changing..
a few days ago he bought that conversation up again
and when i explained it to him all over again he was pissed with me
"aren't you willing to have sex with me?" "dont you love me?" "why are you doing this to me?"
etc
why is he in such a hurry? doesnt he value me or respect me???
what can be wrong
I just dont know what to do now..
please help me:(
please dont tell me to dump him... I love him alot and i cant live without him...
is anything wrong with me??? if so please explain ...
Please help me...
(link)
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The reason you don't want us to tell you to dump him is because you know it's the right answer. He has no right to be pissed over your choice to remain a virgin until married. If he can't hack that tell him to hit the bricks.
I have news for you and it's not pretty he doesn't love you. He's after sex and is going to manipulate you to get it. You might love him but someone who loves you back will not pressure you over it. They will get it the first time that you aren't interested.
He neither values you, the relationship, or your feelings and beliefs. He wants only one thing from the looks of it. whether to have sex with someone or remain a virgin is your decision not his. You made it and if he can't deal with it tell him where the door can be found.
Don't go against your religious principals or personal beliefs for anyone period EVER! In the long run it's always you that has to live with making a right or wrong choice about sex or anything else. Stick to your guns.
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well my boyfriends parents really liked me and everything but yesterday i was at this carols thing at the park with my friends, and my boyfriend and his family were there. his mum and dad were standing at the top and i was at the bottom and i had 1 sip of beer from a friend then i realised my boyfriends parents saw me ..
i think they hate me now and i dont know what to do..my boyfriend says they will get over it but i cant get over it because i feel really bad . please help :(
thankss (link)
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If I were you I would talk to his parents and apologize for your "lapse in judgment." Let them know that you're a good kid and do not drink like that regularly or are irresponsible. tell them you learned a lesson not to touch alcohol until you're older and be sincere on that.
I think they would think lesser of you only if you didn't acknowledge what happened and just went on. Your boyfriend's approach to let it blow over is not going to help you at all with relating to his parents.
Also tell them the truth about when you drink that you've never done it to excess etc. They will respect you for coming forward and showing them that you are a good person for their son.
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18/f
ok so im still a virgin but the guy i like isnt. do guys care if a girl they date is still a vigin or not. (link)
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It really depends on the maturity or lack there of for each individual guy. At your age you will find guys who will support you for sticking to your principal and beliefs. If they can't hack the fact you wish to be a virgin until truly ready tell them to hit the road.
I'm sure this person will understand and it will be one of the things that never crosses his mind. If you are meant to be together he'll respect it.
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i have mac (leopard)
and i downloaded the gimp with x11
and it opens like its going to work
then i hit file-->new
and i go to like put the paint brush on it and everything closes down
is there a way to prevent this?
or did i download it wrong? (link)
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Call 1-800-My-Apple and ask for the U.S. or Canada number for Apple Care. If you bought the protection plan for your machine they should help you.
If not, it's inexpensive and worth getting while on the line with them. Tell them exactly what you did when installing it and they'll give you tips to fix it. That's my best recommendation for you. Call Apple direct.
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20/f
My fiance and I are getting married. He wants a bachelor party though. Before I say yes, what exactly goes on in a bachelor party. I know girls come to their house/where ever or they go to a strip club with their guys, but do they happen to have sex with the strip girls? I don't feel comfortable if that happens obviously. So could you please tell me what all happens at those parties. Thank you! (link)
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When it comes to a strip club there are strict rules about what a customer can and cannot do when it comes to lap dances.
If the guy violates the rules about touching or makes the stripper uncomfortable he's tossed out by the bouncer or if it's considered assualt the police are involved.
There's no opportunity at all for sexual touching or sexual acts at a strip club unless the place is a front for something. Don't worry there.
There's a strict code between the dancers, the management, the bouncers and the customers about people's behavior.
Most women who strip for private parties also have the same rules as the club would and usually show up in pairs to make sure they are safe and will walk out if they sense their clients are going to be a problem.
I'm not saying that sex doesn't happen at a private party but the odds are extremely minute as the stripper always needs to stay safe as they're taking a risk by being there.
These rules are also posted inside the club and it's usually a zero tolerance policy at that. if anyone approached a male client and offered something it means to get out of there as something isn't right. This doesn't happen hardly if ever.
The only person you have to worry about is your husband. Everything will be okay as other guys are there too. They'll know exactly what he is doing all night.
I would for your piece of mind send a female friend along with the guys to the party if you are uncomfortable with it and tell your husband that's just the way it is. However, if you let him go alone you can rest assured all's fine.
Your problem isn't with strippers here it's with your trust of him in general.
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Randomly, my phone would start acting weird. It was at one bar & it kept shutting off. I plugged it in & tried going into my text messages. It kept exiting me out of everything I went into. Then after it charged, it started working again. A few hours later, I went to do something on my phone & it kept exiting me out. Then when I went back into it & tried to use the end key, neither end key worked at all. I have a LG ENV so I have two end keys. Neither would work & since you turn the phone on by using the end keys, I had to keep taking the battery out of the back. It kept shutting on & off randomly. Now it's working again but I'm not sure if I should get it checked out or not since the problem keeps going away & coming back. Any ideas on what this could be?? If it helps, I had this phone for about a month because its Refurbished because my other phone broke & they sent me this one for $50. It's really annoying though. Any suggestions?? Thanks!! (link)
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Walk into your local mall where there's bound to be an outlet for your carrier. Try their web site first to find an exact location if one isn't in the mall and take it in.
Tell them what is happening with it and see what they can do for you. If it's less than a month old and they just sold it to you in all liklihood they have to rectify it.
That is unless it's been damaged by something you or someone else did to it which isn't the case. mind you, you'll find tat they're skeptics based on them having to replace a phone earlier that you broke.
If you can't get the answer you are looking for by visiting an outlet call their 1-800 number and tell them that they just sold you this phone and this is what is going on. They will know what to do to help or should.
be weary of the word "refurbished" next time. It means it's been used before and new parts have been put in.
I have a hunch your problem lies with the battery. It might be faulty or you're over charging it causing the phone to act screwy because the battery is no good. That's the first place you want them to look at. Good luck!
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I started since 4 is it normal to do it at that age? Im 27 f now and have stopped doing it but can't help it sometimes. How do i quit?
The most important of all i have charco rednesss
down there from doing it too much how do i remove the redness?
(link)
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Men, women, children, teens, seniors all masturbate. It's very common with toddlers and universal with teens. There's nothing wrong with starting at that age as it was non-sexual. You found your genitals like you did other parts of your body and learned touching them feels good. You're healthy and normal.
As far as stopping goes find other activities you could be doing rather than masturbating. I'm not sure what has caused the redness or how to treat it being a male. If it is persistent see a doctor and stop masturbating and sexual activity until you do.
Quitting is about will power and occupying your time with something better or seeing friends etc. If you're staying home just to touch yourself than that isn't healthy.
Masturbation is natural and you can continue to do it provided that it's not something that occupies a ton of your time. It's fine as long as it's not your primary focus and only thing you are interested in. Once a day, even twice is considered normal.
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Okay so I get really shy around guys and don't say like ANYTHING and all I do is smile, and I sort of hate my smile anyways. But yeah, so, a ton of guys always talk to my friend, she's a total flirt! and I love her like a sister, but I'll admit i get jealous at times. I'm normally pretty extrovert but around guys im like SUPER quiet. What can I say or do? I feel like i don't know them that well. Even though I've gone to school with them FOREVER. I hate being the quiet girl in the corner, it acctually gets pretty lonely sometimes ill admit. Any ideas? (link)
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It's YOU that have put yourself into that corner. If you can be yourself and an extrovert everywhere else its nonsense that you can't with them. They are exactly like your friends and talking to them.
Treat talking to them no different and get in there and socializing with them. Go in with a mental script in your head where you'll ask them about their interests, sports, entertainment, school, goals etc. etc. watch what your friend does and start copying her. Ask for pointers and her to introduce you to people.
Its no different than talking to your girlfriends or a family member. There's no need to be scared because they want to know you. Believe me they might be equally as shy to approach you.
Force yourself to talk to someone next time and talk about the stuff above. It will work and as you do it more and more you'll feel confident. These guys aren't out to crucify you if you talk with them. RELAX and just be you and forget about that other shit that's holding you back.
There's no reason you can't have guys hanging off of you like she does. She's confident though and you aren't. These guys can see it or might think you're anti-social. Show them you're alive here.
Think of it like acting. Don't overdo things or be fake but start playing the part of the flirt, confident, easy-going extravert with them and look for openings in conversations to get noticed.
You need to introduce yourself to guys too. Make an effort and just go with the flow. Follow what your friend is doing as well.
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why would someone pick mac over a pc?
for graphics would a mac be better then a pc? such as a tablet pc?
and if its not would there be a way to improve a mac to live up to a tablet pc? (link)
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Security would be the number one reason. It's bloody impossible to have a virus or trojan horse or even a worm on a MacIntosh. They swear by this. There's no error messages like there is with a PC. It's all more user friendly and things are organized for you so you can find them with one click. Goodbye folders.
Also you need a MacIntosh if you are doing Web design, page design, photo shop or creative projects or recording your own music or making your own movies.
Another thing I like is that the Macintosh has built in dictionary, calendar/organizer and guess what it's plug and play! You just plug it in as it's all one unit and it picks up your Internet connection automatically as well as printer.
The word processor is better than WORD and is $89.00 compared to $300-500 for one that works with Windows.
A lot of people are not happy with Vista at all and are downgrading to XP. You should read the articles about Leopard it's amazing.
This brings me to my next point you can run both Windows and Macintosh Leopard or OSX on a Mac and toggle between the two.
If you buy one you won't regret it! You can also get three years worth of technical support through Apple Care.
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So basically I am not one to curse. I've hardly ever done it and only a few people have ever heard me. Sometimes I get made fun of for it, good-natured fun though. I don't mind when other people cuss but I just don't like doing it myself. Well I have recently had to catch myself multiple times. It would be easy for me to let it out, but I'm afraid to because I think whoever it was directed towards would be extremely hurt because it is coming from me, who "never cusses" lol. Its confusing, but if you understand slightly what I mean, could you give me some advice here? thanks (link)
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If the people around you swear far more often than how could they look down at you? As long as you use swear words sparingly you are fine and nobody will think any less of you. If you use them all the time or every second word then we have a problem.
Cursing sometimes if you get hurt, are frustrated, in a fight or when no other word will do is fine. Not cursing left and right is admirable as most teens need their language cleaned up as do adults. If you get made fun of for not cursing consider it a badge of honor and look at the source of the taunts.
You're likely to be respected more by adults for the way you speak and handle yourself.
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so me and my bf went out for 4 months and i broke up with him about a month ago. i still get jealous when hes around other girls...especially hes other ex girlfriends! but i know i dont want to go out with him bc it will only cause trouble and i keep tryingt o convince myself that i dont need him but everyday i just have to talkt o him idk what to do!! i still like him but i dont want him back! (link)
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Be cordial at school. Don't stop to talk long but acknowledge he's there. When it comes to other girls just remind yourself they have no idea what dating him is like. You're not missing anything because he would behave the same way as always towards you.
Just remind yourself of all the reasons you aren't dating any longer and that will quell your jealously faster than anything else. I's okay to have feelings for someone still if you broke up recently. That's normal and will fade.
Nobody said this would be easy but if you keep telling yourself and convincing yourself what trouble he was you'll get over him fast.
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15 f\ virgin
I'm a little older then 15 and a half. I love my boyfriend dearly. I really AM ready to have sex with him and I want to give him something I can't take back or give anyone else. I would have sex with him, however, I feel I'm just too young! I know for a fact no one would find out about it, I rather it be personal. I would like to know your opinion. I know I am ready, I just consider 15 young.
thanks alot, xo (link)
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Your gut should overrule all else. If you feel 15-years-old is too old than trust that. There's a reason it keeps coming to you when you think about sex. You may be ready physically, love wise but not able to handle the mental aspect. Who wants a baby at 15 anyways?
If he loves you and you love him you can count on him to be around for a long while. Put sex on the back burner for now and come back to it when you're a bit older.
The doubt you are having either means you aren't ready or that you don't think you should with him. It could even be both those reasons. Trust your gut because it's always right. If you keep thinking you're too young than maybe you are.
Don't be in a rush to have sex. Make sure it's with the right partner and that you've planned it down to birth control as well. If it's not with the right person than don't. Trust me, it will be awful otherwise. And, to be honest it doesn't live up to the hoopla the first time.
Focus on your relationship, being a teenager and then later as the relationship progresses more consider it again. It isn't about age here it's about the maturity of both partners and thinking ahead to protect yourself. It's a lot for any 15-year-old to handle.
What you need to be doing is getting books, facts, research on sex and sexuality and a birth control plan and keep talking about this subject with him until you know you can both handle it.
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im 16 and a junior in high school. i have this friend and she keeps sayin shes bi-sexual...but i think its just to get attention. she did the same thing last year then we everyone asked her if it was true she said no. now shes sayin shes bi again and i asked her if she cud she herself havin sex with another gurl and she didnt know wut to say. obviosuly if your bi then you can see your self with the opposite sex doin things that more then friends do. idk wut to do about all this. it just pisses me off becuz i think shes doin it for attention. (link)
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How would you feel if she was indeed bi-sexual and it wasn't for attention? Tread lightly here and do not show you're irritated or don't believe her claims.
You never know what she might be thinking or dealing with or te reasons behind her saying it. She might be confused here and truly bi-sexual or testing people for their reaction.
She might be attracted to guys and girls but never thought of what sex with either would be like. Treat her like anyone else. If it turns out she did it for attention than that will come to light without you stating your thoughts.
You'll look very bad if you say or do anything over her remarks right now and it turns out she wasn't kidding.
If she irritates you find a way not to be around her as much. Perhaps if she sees from others that her saying she is "bi-sexual" isn't a big deal she'll stop telling everyone.
If you know for 100% damn sure she's straight than and only then do you pull her aside and find out why she's saying this. You could under those circumstances only educate her that it's not right to claim to be gay or bisexual because you're being ignored otherwise.
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my crush says that he is getting me something for christmas.bbut i dont know if that is true or not. should i get him something?
please give suggestions!! thanks (link)
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If he told you directly than you can rest assured he will be getting you something. People don't tell others to expect a gift and suddenly don't give them one.
Assume that he is getting you a present and buy him something small in return. If you aren't sure what to get him ask his friends, siblings etc. or buy him a gift card for the movies or bookstore.
Then I would get a Christmas card and stick the gift card etc in it. Thank him for his friendship in the card (one line will do it) and sign it.
Hand it to him and tell him "I didn't want you to get me something and not have something in return." Regardless of whether he gives you something or not this shows you have class. he'll remember you for it regardless.
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1) This guy in most of my classes.
We talk a lot, always say hey when we see eachother around school. Today I had to stay behind and talk to the teacher, and he waited the 10 minutes for me, although all of his friends went off.
He's fun to hang around with, and he's never mean, always nice to me.
Nice, Flirty, or something else?
2) One of #1's friends. We flirt a lot..talk quite often and so on.
Nice, Flirty or something else?
Thanks :P (link)
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To be honest with you we can't tell. The only way you will know is if you confront him about this. He could just being nice and staying behind to talk with you. Then again he could be hoping you sense he likes you through his behavior.
If he is your #1 friend the behavior is probably but not necessarily typical for him. If you want to see if he likes you or explore a possible relationship just talk to him. At this point you have known each other for ages so it would never ruin your friendship if you addressed it.
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I am looking for a CD that has Frank Sinatra singing "Somewhere beyond the sea" on it. I can't seem to find it anywhere. Any kind of greatest hits or such album will be fine. Thanks for all help.
PS: I need to find this before January 9th.
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The reason you can't find it is because Sinatra did a cover of it but never recorded it. This is according to the person who wrote it.
See link
http://wiki.answers.com/Q/Did_Frank_Sinatra_ever_record_or_perform_the_Bobby_Darin_hit_'Beyond_The_Sea'
(somewhere) Beyond the Sea was a Bobby Darin number and a hit because of him. Darin was the subject of a recent biopic starring Kevin Spacey. There's plenty of albums with his version on them but none containing Frank's.
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My mind is troubled. I am thinking about suicide. I know it isn't the answer, yet I have been thinking about it for years, but have done nothing. I am not suffering from depression, but I am a bit depressed. I get aalong each day yet there is an empty void inside me that has no solution. It eats at me everyday all the time. Suicide seems like the only solution. The more I deny it the more I want it. I can't inflict pain on myself, but if I were to do it it would be by pills. I am not saying I am going to, just that I think I think about it too much. I have no religion. I believe that when you die, your soul moves on and takes you to the place you truly desire. Not heaven. For me I belive that my soul will take me to another body of the alias and world I created in my mind. Mostly I created it for an escape from family and life, but lately it has become an addiction.
What should I do. I can't talk to my parents, a therapist, without anyone knowing, but I am afraid that one day i will end my life. and that pull to do it is getting stronger, not because I am depressed, but because I am curious, and the void is pulling towards it.
I really need help. (link)
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You keep saying that you're not depressed. You are trying to convince yourself of something you can't. You may not be able to see it for yourself but most anyone can tell you have a serious mental health issue and medical emergency.
You don't want to die and that much is evident. You would have never turned to us or anyone for guidance otherwise. The problems you have may seem enormous and unsolvable but they aren't. Suicide won't end them or cure them either. The price is too high and it's a stupid thing to do regardless of what the problem seems to be.
If you have a hard time asking people for help about this walk into any emergency room and tell them how you are feeling. They will have a doctor give you a psychiatric assessment and prescribe medication. They will keep you in a safe environment inside the hospital where you can't leave until well again.
Your problem is a mental illness that is eating away at you. Until you treat it medically it will ruin your life. It doesn't have to. There's NO embarrassment or shame about approaching your loved ones about how you have been feeling and ask for help.
You can turn to a teacher, relative or someone you trust and just tell them to take you to an emergency room and get this dealt with. The only people who would know is you, the doctor and your immediate family. All of this is strictly confidential.
Do the right thing and get medical help. You aren't the first nor the last person to have dealt with this issue. You can have a normal and happy life that you long for if you make the right call here. Think about it not once but twice! You're too valuable to people around you and society even if you don't get that inside your head yet.
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I've had a friend for about 3 going on 4 years,
we've never been anything more than friends but I liked him and he liked me at a time too.
We lost our virgnity to eachother once and got into this fight and didnt talk to much for a few monthes.
We made up and became friends again[i never stopped liking him]
He acted like he liked me ,but we still didnt go out.
Since about June,we've both been sexually active without ONLY eachother
but we aren't going out,but at the same time I still like him but i feel like its been way to long to tell him ,and he said he used to like me but idk about now.
And i learned about something called oxytocin,or "love glue" and i feel like im really attached to him ,because i havent been able to get over him no matter what,but ive been able to get over other guys i HAVENT had sex with,which i havent had sex with anyone except him ...
Do you think he's attatched to me to..?
I know its wrong to do stuff with someone your not going out with,and i dont have sex with him just because he wants to ,because i want to as well,but i dont know im kind of confused... (link)
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If things continue the way that they are now someone's going to get hurt. In all likelihood that someone is going to be you. Tell him that while you enjoy having sex and all that you want a relationship and commitment. If you can't get that you need to keep it strictly a friendship.
Right now he has the ability and you do too to date other people and be intimate with them. Either ask him how he feels and get into a relationship or keep it strictly friends. If your emotions can take it make a pact that you can see other people and know that before doing anything else. This seldom works though as people get jealous and drift apart. The only way to see where things stand is to confront him on it.
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Okay so I am 14, and so is my boyfriend. We are so in love with eachother, and I know that. I really think I'm ready to have sex with him, but I feel like I'm too young. Can anyone tell me how they knew it was time? And what it was like? Thank you (: (link)
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Trust me, you will know when it's time. It will be as clear as day in your mind. There's no mistaking it. How do you know you're ready? It's simple really! Once the nagging questions, doubts, anxiety disappear and you totally trust a person is when.
Also more importantly here is when you know you're both mature enough to talk about it together. If you can't do that than it's not time yet. You have to have a level head and maturity or it's a mistake.
If you feel too young than trust your gut on that. 14 is young but it's about maturity level and age at the same time. Be sure to get on birthcontrol to avoid pregnancy.
If you have any doubts about having sex right now than hold off. If he loves you he can wait. Be 100% sure in your mind he's the guy.
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