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advice
sorry in advance, because this is long..
okay so on spring break i re-met this guy, will, that i met at the same resort 2 years ago. the last time we had been a little flirty, but that was the extent of it. when i saw him this year, he asked me if i wanted to hang out one night. we hung out for about 3 hours, and he fell into the ocean (we laughed about that for a while...just wait, this will be relevant later). the next night, we hung out again and he kissed me for a long time. we hung out a couple more times...and kissed for probably 4 or 5 hours total (not kidding). he asked me for my screenname before he left, and we've been keeping in touch ever since. he's been really sweet and conversation has come fairly easily to us up until now. he asked me if i saw what we had as a "fling", which i had originally thought it would be but don't anymore....i told him this and asked him the same thing but he didn't want to answer "because after it's all said and done we won't have anything to talk about anymore". but every night before he leaves he makes a point of telling me how much he misses me. i'm wondering if you think that he really does like me, and if you think it's weird that he won't tell me if it was a fling or not. i want to know what he thinks without asking him upfront, because i know we can't have a long distance relationship. thank you!
thanks for the inbox!! and i have seen longer :D
but yes i very much so think that he likes you. But i think the reason why he hasnt told you might be that he hasnt told himself? Do you get what im saying. Maybe he hasnt really decided. Or maybe he thought it was a fling and doesnt want to upset you. But my best bet would be he is kind of confused. Summer love can do many things to people. It can make memories, break hearts, and bloom greater promises. I would just tell him that you really need to know how he feels and you wont get mad for what he says. hope i helped you and good luck! :)
-hayley
ok usually when i have my period coming my boobs hurt ya cool and what not. but its my niples to like they hurt when i were to lean on a desk or something i havnt had sex or ne thing but its like ow stop are they growing if so great go ahead ladies but if not im pissed. whats going on with the girls?
i have the same situation going on right now. It is just the hormones kicking in. yeah they could be growing. but it is probably just hormones
-hayley
latley, me and my best friend have been drifting apart.
im usually not the jealous type;
actually i really never am
but this time; i have to admit...
i am jealous.
even how much that takes out of me.
my best friend, who i usually hang out with everyday and/or talk on the phone for 3478590 hours, is hanging with another person, someone who ive known ever since the 6th grade- a close friend but not best friend
ANYWAYS
theyve been hanging out alot latley
meaning NO phone calls and deffinatly no attention towards me.
lets call my best friend "Mary"
this has been happening for a week now; and its aggrivating me.
"Mary" would come up to me and tell me her fun time with - lets call her "Julie"- .."julie";
I would put on a fake smile and an occasional laugh- but deep inside it would hurt.
I only know why she would be telling me this- because she WANTS me to feel something.
Shes the jealous type-VERY JEALOUS and she has told me that she thinks i could be one.
Maybe she wants me to be jealous?
her NEW friend.
i knoooww we have other friends
but... coming to me to tell me your little party and bragging how her and "julie" had SUCH a great time on their sleepover... isnt such a positive thing about 'other friends'.
like today;
MARY: Hey what are you doing tonight?
ME: uhhh. hmm idont know yet?
MARY: oh im having another sleepover with JULIE; man it feels like ive been spending alot of time with that girl..
ME: hmph.thats..cool.
Why-- would you.. UGH
I HATE JEALOUSY.
ive never been fond of it myself;
but here i am giving it off.
advice?
maybe she is trying to make you jealous. i would just ignore her, that or ask her what her if she is a lesbian by the way she talks about julie. That might get her to shut up about her. And plus it would give you giggles! :)
-hayley
okayyyyyyyyyy;;
so, one of my best friends that ive known ever since the fourthhh graddeee is hanging with one of my ooothhheerr best friends.
like they met from me- how do i explain it.
but they hang out all the time now.
like my fourth grade friend lets call her - Lily- and my other best friend- Mary-
Lily would seem to be more excited when she sees mary.. like lily would be all dull with me.. and voice her opinions with me and sometimes even treat me like crap; but its really normal because she can be a selfish person.
but with lily; she lauughhhs, she goes with whattevver mary wants with out an opinion on it.
Lily lives right across the street from me and i always invite mary over;
so when mary is over shes like ": want to hangout with lily?"
im like " uh.. ? uh sure?"
-_-
when theyre together me and mary always get in fights because shes always so FAKE when shes with lily.
BOTH OF THEM ARE.
ughhhhhhhhhhh
so to prove my point more;
theyre hanging out together right now.
and i wasnt invited.
....
its always like a three thing
i dont know whos taking who away.
lily is taking mary away
and mary is taking lily away.
like; when im with them.
i just feel like crap.
nothing i could do to make them interested.
im nothing.
they seem so happy in "their" world...
i try not to think about it because it just makes me so made and depressed because i dont think i can really do anythign about it?
any advice?
dont get mad or depressed because it isnt worth it. You dont need to be treated like that. It is their loss and i know all of this is cliche but trust me its true. If they are going to treat you like crap you dont need them anyway. Its just not healthy. But i would try and talk to them seperately..tell them how you feel.
-hayley
female/16 is it possible to be in love with somebody with in a week and you've never met them. but you talk for about 5 hours a night on the phone and all through out the day on text and aim.?
i mean i know that is stupid. but idk if im in love with them or thier persoanilty? im aware of the standards its just hard cause they live 10 states away and we met on myspace? shady....i know. but shes all i think about and i love talking to her so much ive neevr been this happy and lately i feel im on top of the world/ its weird cause im not a lesbian im confused if im bisexual but i love her and ive never met her? what do i do please help
well, wow..you met on myspace?? i think that is difficult because there are some shady characters there...not saying she is but better be safe than sorry. For all you know she could be a 60 year old man..but i believe it is just you are in love with who you think they are...but if you are doubting it at all like seriously doubting if you are in love..not like saying you dont want to be in love but if you are truly denying it, then i dont think you are in love, i think it is lust or infatuation.
-hayley
So I'm making a list of things I want to do this summer, and I saw your answer about making a slip and slide in your friend's kitchen, and I thought it was genius!
Do you have any other fun ideas like that I can do over the summer? =]
why thank you!! ha ha
well there was another time where me and that same friend went snipe hunting with her younger cousins...just to fill you in incase you dont know...get a young dumb person and a pillow case and a flashlight, and take them in the woods, then leave them there..so funny but you do have to come back unfortanately..but you gotta say it has sharp blood thirsty teeth and razor claws...yeah funny..
and then me and my other friend went to a football game and played football with the football players...it was like 5 girls against 3 guys..it was fun
we also went ghost hunting in an abandoned trailer park behind her house behind the woods...yeah we took the same cousins we took snipe hunting...and we told them to go into one of the trailers and they came out screaming...never figured out why though..
and then there was the time where we had a cart race with three of my other friends in kmart....two would push and two would sit in it and we would race around the store..we also did that at walmart but with the electronic motorized ones ha ha
hope i helped you!! have fun!!
-hayley
So i made this site on buddy4u.com called Were [all] x uncool! and its for people to realize that even if you call someone a loser or a dork or a nerd for being different from them, they may still be the same. so anyways, people submit the uncool or "loserish" things they do and i add them on. well id like some of the "loserish" things people on advicenators do, so i can add them to my site (: thanks!
well one day me and my friend were at her house and her parents told us to mop the floor so when they left we put on our bathing suits and made a slip and slide with her kitchen floor and mopped it that way.
and when i am at home sick i watch the beginning of the Wonder Pets because i think the duck is cute.
-hayley
http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=536260
a couple days ago my crush randomly out of nowhere asked me "what is the temperature?" i asked him what he meant and he was just like, "you knoww, the temperature" and since i was clueless, he just brushed it off with a "nevermind" and turned around, laughing. not knowing what he meant, i searched on urbandictionary.com and thought that he MIGHT have asked me if i think he's hot / dig him.
what do you think he meant by that? what's the double meaning behind what he meant?
probably wanted to know if you think hes hot.
-hayley
Okay. Well theres this boy.
lets say his names connor.
(im in 7th grade he's in 8th grade)
Well to most girls it would be huge to get him to reply to a myspace comment/message.
(I've only sent him two and hes never replyed so I gave up on that)
but then I told my friend how me and him sometimes exchange looks and flirt in the halls.
and she said thats "BIG STUFF."
I really like him.
and if I have no chance at that then I'd love to be friends.
I'm not at the point were I can be like "Hey. You want to hang out later?" or anything like that. We dont talk like that.
But lately hes been sending "signals"
and I dont know what they mean.
- When I open my locker he gently slams it shut
- When I'm walking by he'll call my name
- When I'm walking past his house he calls my name and waves (only when hes with his friends.)
- One day his friends came outside of his house and yelled for me to come in, but I was too shy. and somehow they all knew my name. So how did my name get borught up I wonder?
- Out of all my friends, I'm the one he notices.
So please tell me what any of this means.
Love, Rachel
girl i think he likes you but to be sure just get really flirty and show him some killer signals too.
-hayley
my very, very best friend just told me she cuts herself and that her mom is abusive. her parents divorced this summer and thats when she started. she lied to me about a big mark on her arm and i knew she was upset so later i asked her if it was her mom again. she and her mom have had tons of fights but i never knew how badly her mom treated her. and i had never guessed about the cutting. i have cut myself but only a few times and i stopped and i still somewhat struggle with self-injuring (i pinch myself occasionally) but im fine now. but her mom through her out of the house for like 45 min she was out in the cold rain. and her mom has hit her with shoes and pulled her hair and yells at her and tells her shes a horrible person. her mom never makes time for her and is always working or with her new boyfriend. my friend hates her moms new bf because he takes all her moms time away. she tries to talk to her mom but she never understands and just yells at her. she goes to church with me and is trying so hard to be a good Christian and her mom knows that so she was telling her she doesnt have God and isnt a Christian and that shes a terrible person and hits her and stuff. she lives with her dad a lot but still her mom just as often but i told her she lives in an abusive place (with her mom) and shes probably going to just stay with her dad.
i know her mom needs help but who should she tell because we're only 14 and i know her mom is abusive and everything but idk what to do about it. i think she should tell her dad tho right? and she sees a physciatrist and told her mom about the cutting but her mom acts like she doesnt care. her mom like has took everything of hers away and one time took all her clothes except a tshirt and shorts and said thats all she got for like a month and stuff like that. can people just please tell me the process of what she needs to do to get away from her mom and get her mom help? and im helping my bff and she said she will call me whenever she wants to cut and shes upset and she only cuts when her mom is screaming at her and they have fought and stuff. please help me this is so important and i love my bff so, so, so much. thank you more than you can imagine
btw i d k if i said this but her parents are divorced and she likes being with her dad and she has a younger brother whos ten but he never gets yelled at really or hit or anything. also she has thought of suicide and once got pills and really wanted too but then thought of her dad and friends and brother so she didnt. Thank God. please help me im scared for my friend. thank you!!
when someone says they dont want help it usually means that its when they need your help the most. They still love the abuser and dont want to get them in trouble they are just scared. So i reccomend you tell her father right away. Tell a cop, a conseler. SOMEONE!! She might get mad, but she would be away from her mom.
-hayley
hi.....i need help....lately my knees have been hurting, like a burning feeling and there is numbness in them!I'm 19 and never have had any injuries but lately my knees have been cracking ALOT! what is this??? please answer asap!!!!
ouch, well i would recommend a visit to you doctor and i would like to tell you something. We had a disscussion about muscles in biology and the teacher said you get this burning sensation that hurts when you exercise (just saying they are in shape) and it should stop at least thirty minutes afterwards. But still go to your doctor.
-hayley
What is Ovulation ? [ if i spelled that right ] .
ovulation is the dispensal of an egg in a woman. The 24-28 days between periods is when ovulation occurs. Once the egg has not been fertilized, The blood in the uterus flushing out the egg (a period occurs).
-hayley
you know how before you start your period, you get that white stuff called discharge?? can you still get that if your pregnant??
hope this isnt to hard to understand.
thank alot!!
yeah my sister did a lot while she was pregnant
-hayley
15/f
Okay so I haven't really had a "real" boyfriend before, and this guy and i have sort of had a thing for each other. i'm really scared though because i want to stay a virgin until i'm married and i won't really go farther than making out. Will he get bored of this? Do relationships end because they are bored of making out with you? i'm terrified that we'll be in the middle of a makeout session and he'll stop kissing me and be like "i'm sick of this..." or will he always think making out is fun? do you know any guys who have ever been sick of their girlfriend/making out with them?
well if he does tell you he is sick of making out because he wants sex he is a jerk and doesnt deserve your love and affection. If you dont want to push it farther than making out, and want to be a virgin til your honey moon (By the way i am so PROUD) then you dont have to. Dont let someone pressure you because if a guy loves you he wouldnt be trying to get you to have sex with him in the first place. A good guy would respect you and your body. Trust me i know some guys would like to go further, but if you tell them no, the good ones will listen..
-hayley
ok so first off i'm an 18 year old guy. i've been in a relationship with my dream girl for now 7 1/2 months. she's 17. she's the first girlfriend that i've ever had. before me she dated a guy for 7 months, they broke up about a year and a 1/2 ago, but that was pretty much it for her. we're both deeply in love with each other. before her i was depressed and miserable but she changed all that and since we've been together i'm happier than i ever could've imagined. i know that she's really happy with me too. so basically we can't get enough of each other. something that has really been getting to me lately is the issue of sex. in 7 1/2 months we haven't done anything sexual at all, no blowjobs, no handjobs or anything like that. i kind of thought that was a good thing for the first couple months because we were able to make something great together without sex or anything but lately it's been getting to me. i'm really sexually attracted to her and it's just driving me crazy. i know that she's strongly attracted to me too, she's said so and i'm exactly her type. we've both sent each other alot of nude pictures and there was no big deal about it. i feel completely comfortable sending them to her and she feels the same. we do touch each other alot, not sexually however. for example, sometimes we'll just lay on her bed for 4 hours snuggling up with each other really tight just talking about how much we love each other and stuff. we have this thing where we tickle each other alot. we tickle bare skin like the stomach, back, and she likes tickling my "man boobs". she also likes giving me wedgies. she's jokingly admitted that the whole wedgy thing is just an excuse to touch my ass. lately all that touching stuff has intensified. i get the feeling that i really need to do something. i know that alot of the time sex is bad for young couples but its been 7 1/2 months and we've made such a solid foundation already without it. i don't really want to go into like real sex until maybe prom night, which is in 2 months. i want our first time to be special and romantic. i do want to do some of the other stuff though. i want to go down on her so badly because i feel like she deserves it and i want to make her feel good. i don't even want a blowjob or anything else all that badly because i just want to make her feel good. she has told me that her ex went down on her while they were dating but she never had sex with him, she's still a virgin like me. it's embarassing to say but i know how to do all of the stuff because i looked it up online. there are alot of times when we have the opportunity to do stuff, both our parents work alot. i really don't know how to even get into that situation. people have said to just kind of "explore" while we're making out and go from there. i'm kind of an awkward kid and i'm somewhat unconfident and very scared of failure even though i've gotten all the info i need from websites and friends, both male and female. so if anyone could help me out i would much appreciate it. i know i probably sound weird but i'm just really confused about the whole thing.
I think that if you truly think that you are ready and you really love her then go for it. Sex is not really a way to show love unless you truly mean it. But it seems as though you guys have already built the foundation needed. But if you do go for it, i reccomend that you not blab about it to your buddies (not saying that you would). But that can make you seem like a jerk. But like i said, if you both are in love and you both are ready, then you should go for it! good luck
-hayley
Okay im in a situation ware i've liked this boy for a couple years now, and i know he's liked me off and on last year and we've hooked up a couple times, but thats nothing. Today me and him were talking and he admitted that he liked me again and i told him i liked him. The thing is, he has a girlfriend right now, they only been together about a week, he told me he was gonna dump her and be with me. Im scared, i really think im going to give him a chance because i like him and have, but i just want an opion to see if i shoundlt. He like's sex a lot, and i've only done it once so i'll be scared and he likes sexual intercorse often, so im just nervous, so help!! i just need some easy advice if i should or what do i do.. i'll give feedback .
okay well as for the fear...there will always be fear..but it should be easier for you if its someone you really think it alright.
and if you dont try then you will go nuts wondering what could of been. And he does have a girlfriend and he does like sex, so he could be a player. Just keep your gaurd up and dont get too close. Because there are many cases where guys say they like a girl and then get the sex and never leave their girlfriend...so just keep an eye out if you do go for it...
-hayley
so earlier this year these girls were really mean to me. they practically ruined the 1st half of the school year. i know not to trust them not because they both arent nice and they've done mean things to other people. now one of my good friends is friends with them. i dont want her to get hurt but if i tell her to be careful around them she will tell them thinking they are friends and they well tell others (school counslor and parents because they love to get me in trouble ) how can i make sure my friend isnt going to behurt by these girls?
really all you can do is let her find out for herself. Its not the advice you were looking for i know, but how will she ever know if she dont experience it. Just be there for her when the walls come crashing down. I know what it feels like to want to protect a friend from a bad thing, but sadly to say you cant control it.
-hayley
in 1994 i dated this guy.then we both went our seperate ways.saw each other again in 1999 i never told him that i loved him.not its 2008 and i had the most wonderful time with him during valentine's day i've never went into such details.I miss him so much i love being in his arms i feel completely like a millin dollar lady.at first i wa very excited because i thought he understood that i don't want to just sleep. but now he say's well that the person that he is today is not the person that i love, but i don't believe that i truely don't want to loose him again with out a fight but now he says the only committ he has is with himself and his daughter. well i have 2 sons and ex husband. i just wish i had someone elses input cause its kind of a long story.
thanks for inboxing and sorry its so late....
i think you should sit down and have a talk with him...Just tell him whats on your mind...or show him that you can be the type of girl he needs and wants....I think that it is wonderful that you have found love again...i truly think it could be done if u both put a little effort into this relationship...maybe make a playdate for your kids? and just tell him how you feel. He could be saying that he isnt the person you love because he doesnt think he deserves you...but dont let that go to your head it is just an option..ha ha but goodluck to you and him!!
-hayley
okay, i got my period in august 2007, I lost it in october 2007, and now it's march 2008. i heard u loose your period for 3 months. But i lost mine for 6 months. All i do is hump things. i always think i am pregnant but how, b/c my stomach isn't growing and i never had sex. But that is what i think; i know it's stupid. I went to the docters and he said it could be because i am under weight b/c i weigh 85lb and that i'm probably not old enough. What do think??? thank you. ps i would like girls to answer......
Okay well i would trust a doctor honey because he/ she did go to school for that stuff a long time. Or like the person below me said it could be your cherry. Rigerous activities can do that. And if you havent had sexual activities with a male you cant be pregnant. Bottom line trust your doctor.
-hayley
15 / f
i have known this girl since elementary school, and we have been "best friends" (i've had other best friends in between until i realized it's pointless to have just ONE best friend).
i've never really had many classes with her throughout middle school, but this year, my freshman year of high school, she's in virtually all my classes.
now at first, we were both elated! we finally got to see each other more often.
but that soon turned around. by december, i knew that i was ready to burst. it hit me. she was absolutely perfect. but the ONE little tiny thing that just made me scream and caused nights of crying myself to sleep was the fact that: every. single. grade. in every. single. one of our mutual classes. she ALWAYS gets the same or (more often) BETTER grade than me on EVERYTHING. homework, tests, quizzes, projects, you name it. and it made me want to vomit. i tried SO HARD. i even bought a new desk to get myself motivated enough to do my homework and really really study.
no one has any idea i feel this way about her. i hate her more than anyone on the face of the planet, pretending to be her best friend. everytime i look at her i just want to slap her. that's all. just give her one hard slap and give her brain cells a little ride so she'll stop getting less than 110% on EVERYTHING.
and what makes it worse? besides the fact that she's always trying to ask me what's wrong and comfort me when she's the problem, after several tests we've taken, she's CONVINCED. like ABSOLUTELY FUCKING CONVINCED. that she failed. and like usually i HATE being like, "oh that wasn't so bad" cause i don't get a 100. but she was CONVINCED. we both get our tests back the day after, and she got an A and i got a B. and i was BEYOND irate.
i'm naturally an extremely jealous person, but she is in 203849023 clubs and she's always saying how she never has anytime to do anything yet she finds the time to do better than ME and i barely do one club.
someone has to help me. i'm seriously losing it. i try so HARD on everything and she reads a packet once and gets a 100 and i read it 20 times, highlight, and outline and get a 95. she's ALWAYS better than me. and i severely need advice on how the hell do deal with this situation. and it's not like i can just go upto her and be like, "dude, i hate you. you're too perfect." and i've TRIED studying WITH her but it makes me want to puke being near her. i tried, i tried. it does no good. i try to get away from her as much as possible and not talk to her but it's hard. it's not that she's a really nosy person, she actually cares about me. it's not that she's a bad person either, i just want to look at my report card and be proud. and i can't. i want to cry.
in conclusion, help me stop being so jealous of this girl's grades and / or life to the point of violent thoughts taking over my brain.
Okay i am sorry not trying to come off as a rude bi**h but you need to get a flippin grip! you are focusing too much on how perfect she is! honey perfect girls are not real. You just have to face the fact that there will always be someone better at you than something! Yes she may make good grades and there are people like that but you cannot do anything about it. And you being her friend when you really hate her is crap. Apparently you dont hate her too much or else you wouldnt be pretending to be her friend. Its not fair to you or her if your gonna be hating her secretly while she is actually caring about you like a TRUE friend. There is really nothing i can tell you about your jealousy problem other than tell her how you feel and move on. It is a sucky waste of time to be sitting around planning revenge on a girl that didnt do a thing to you. Yes i know some people are just so something it makes you sick. I have had that feeling. But you got to know you are doing YOUR best NOT HERS! as long as you try you should be proud of yourself and not be a comparison to others. If she talks about how she "failed a test" tell her to shut up and move on because that is honestly what i would do. Im just open like that.
-hayley
----sorry i wasnt trying to be rude....and im not doing this to change my rating....you give me what you think i deserve...But basically i just think that as long as your doing your best then you are great! So once again sorry for my rudeness and you are NOT a horrible person.