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make out?
15/f
Okay so I haven't really had a "real" boyfriend before, and this guy and i have sort of had a thing for each other. i'm really scared though because i want to stay a virgin until i'm married and i won't really go farther than making out. Will he get bored of this? Do relationships end because they are bored of making out with you? i'm terrified that we'll be in the middle of a makeout session and he'll stop kissing me and be like "i'm sick of this..." or will he always think making out is fun? do you know any guys who have ever been sick of their girlfriend/making out with them?
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
I really am very, very proud of you for making the decision to remain a virgin until wedding night. The man you marry will receive a very special gift and I'm sure he'll be very thrilled.
Never ever give in to sex because you think it's going to ruin a relationship if you don't. A good guy will not pressure you to do any sexual activities. If a guy does say he's sick and tired of only making out then he isn't worth your time. Guys can wait and if they tell you they can't then you shouldn't stick around.
You've chosen the right path and have decided to not give into the stupidity the media feeds us now. You definately should make it very clear to the guy you're seeing that activities will not go past making out unless you two get married. It should be perfectly acceptable for you to have that conversation with the guy so he knows that he should not expect you to give him your body.
Communication is key in every relationship and this really should be out in the open so that you're not concerned over him leaving mid-make-out because he wants more and you won't give it. Open up to the guy and let him know what you've decided for you.
You may want to share your reasons for waiting until marriage so that the boy will fully understand why. He may also see that waiting until marriage is the right decision.
Here is a really good link of 25 reasons why it's important to keep your virginity. It may be some things you haven't thought about, or it may just be some things to point out to the guy:
[Link](Mouse over link to see full location)
If the boy gets upset or says that you two should have sex (even "eventually") then you need to back-track and tell him it is your decision too and you are not going to. It's totally fine to dump someone for pressuring you into things you don't want to do, especially when it's disrespecting you entirely.
Again, I'm very proud of you for making the right choice and I hope that you find a good guy that isn't going to pressure you for more.
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I have a short sweet and simple answer for you. If he truly cares about you he'll respect your decision and wait. If not honey he wasnt worth your time and was in it for only one thing. Better to find out sooner than later when you might get really hurt by it.
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well if he does tell you he is sick of making out because he wants sex he is a jerk and doesnt deserve your love and affection. If you dont want to push it farther than making out, and want to be a virgin til your honey moon (By the way i am so PROUD) then you dont have to. Dont let someone pressure you because if a guy loves you he wouldnt be trying to get you to have sex with him in the first place. A good guy would respect you and your body. Trust me i know some guys would like to go further, but if you tell them no, the good ones will listen..
-hayley
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Yes. Every guy ever.
I commend you for holding on to your virginity. I'm 25 years old and a virgin (by choice). I've always thought of my virginity as a gift that I want to give to the man that I love on our wedding night. It sounds so sweet and perfect, but the truth is...life isn't a fairytale. If you're going to remain a virgin until you're married, you're going to have to be willing to go through hell to get to heaven.
I've fooled myself into believing that I was in love several times. I've been ready to give it away thinking that I'd met the one. I told myself it'd be no big deal to give in early to the guy if he's the one I'm going to marry. The problem with that is if you wait long enough and don't give in, things fall apart and you'll see that you made the right decision.
The truth is, it's hard to say no. It's especially hard to say no to guys you have feelings for. But if the guy truly loves you, he'll wait because he knows it's what you want. The trouble with that is, most younger people (especially guys) don't care what other people want. Their priorities are their own needs and desires first. That makes waiting more difficult.
Being young is fun because you get to be selfish. Selfishness and love are two things that don't mix. Trying to find a guy who's young and who's willing to wait for sex is next to impossible. That sets up the person who's waiting for sex for a lot of pain and heartache. Virtually your only two choices are to embrace the pain to come or keep your heart to yourself.
There will be lots of tears, trust me. There will be many times when you think you've found the one only to realize you've found a jerk. There will be lots of wanting, trust me on that too. There will be many times when all you want is to have a connection with another person as deeply as the ones people around you are having. The loneliness is the hardest part.
The best way to deal with a situation like this is to surround yourself around people who support you and share your desire to wait. You're going to need all the support you can get, and it's hard remaining a virgin and hearing about the wonderful sex lives of others. However, keep an eye on those people. Those are the people whose lives are overly complicated.
Use their stress as an inspiration not to give in.
You should know that there are several good things about being a virgin. Not only will your life be less complicated (no pregnancies, no STDs, no boys using you as their sex toy), but it'll be enhanced. You'll learn to respect yourself more. Others will admire your strength and willpower. And because they can't have you, guys everywhere will want you.
I'm not going to lie...I'm a tease, and I love it. There's nothing that makes you feel sexier than not having sex. There's no greater sense of power, control, or pleasure you get from knowing that you're the center of attention and that you have something everybody wants but can't have. That feeling will give you a rush. It's like an orgasm that doesn't end.
Embrace that power.
Don't see waiting for sex as something you're not doing. See it as something very bold that you are doing. You're taking the road less traveled. That's a good thing. You can watch a porn and see what sex is like, but how many people can say they know what being a virgin at 20 or 25 or 30 is like? Obviously, you may get married sooner than that, so don't stress.
Lastly, masturbate.
There's nothing wrong with masturbating, and it's the #1 tool that helps people truly wait for sex until they're married. Learn how your body works and learn how to use it to your advantage. I promise you, not only will you have a good time on your own, but it'll make you a better lover for your future husband. That makes the gift you have to give even sweeter.
Good luck and let me know if you have anymore questions! :)
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