"People, even more than things, have to be restored, renewed, revived, reclaimed, and redeemed; never throw out anyone." - Audrey Hepburn
I came to this site for advice about a man and love. That very question turned my entire world around and I have had my eyes opened to things I never noticed before.
I've stayed here so that I can share the knowledge I do have. I know I'm not changing the world but I do hope that I spark others to open their eyes.
"The only thing to do with good advice is pass it on. It is never any use to oneself." - Oscar Wilde
So, if you learn something from what I say then repeat it to someone else who can use it.
I hope that if you see an answer of mine that you enjoy it will inspire you to go out of your way to give good, solid information. Provide links for further information, detail your responses, encourage people to seek out professionals when it's needed, and stop sugar-coating responses and just say the truth.
I hope that even if you absolutely hate my answer that it'll kick start your brain. Hopefully you'll begin taking your time to respond instead of hurried answers that are useless to an already confused person.
"In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: it goes on." - Robert Frost
Gender: Female Location: WV / KY / ND Occupation: Technical Account Management Age: 24 Member Since: October 12, 2007 Answers: 1511 Last Update: August 15, 2011 Visitors: 144094
Favorite Columnists karenR DangerNerd russianspy1234 GilbertMar ThirdQED mikesadvice Eldritch my2cents
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so me and my boyfriend have been having sex and i like im a lot and i want it to be good so what would be some great ways to turn him on i mean i don't want him to get bored or anything so like foreplay? people told me to just ask him what turns him on but that would be a bit awkward so any tips? (link)
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The only way you'll truly know what the guy gets all hot and heavy about is to ask him. While we can say, "Well, most guys like x, y, and z..." your guy may not be like that at all. It's like saying, "All guys like younger women!" when, while it may seem that way majority of the time, it isn't true at all and some men are completely turned off by the idea of a younger woman.
Turn him on by asking about his turn ons. Be romantic and sensual about it. Get close and whisper in his ear. Get him wanting to talk about what he really desires. Use key words like: hot, desire, sexy. Share a few of your fantasies and desires with him to get him in the mood to open up if you have to.
Beyond that, we don't know the guy. Everything suggested could end up going sour and creating a problem. I don't think it'd be fun to get into the mood and you say something you probably think is a major turn on for guys and he just loses his erection. Guys are human and, thus, are not the same.
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I love sleeping, I sleep ALOT. At least I need to sleep 12 hours a day and sometimes i sleep more.
I never wake up because of a nightmare or such. I am also a very heavy sleeper.
But its been more than a week, I havnt been able to sleep well. Like I sleep but i'd wake up 7 or more times in my bed because of different nightmares i am having.
no light and not any noise, my room is perfect for sleeping.
Why is that happening to me? I love sleeping and the nightmares suck. Like 7 different dreams, and its been going on for more than a week.
HELP!! (link)
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I know this is not a concrete answer, but hopefully it will provide some assistance.
It could be what you're eating or what you have eaten within the past week or more.
Foods can do things to our bodies. Even simple, naturally foods like broccoli can alter the hormonal balance within our bodies. It's all usually very stabilizing and doesn't tend to cause us problems.
However, what we eat is not always natural and organic. Chocolate, for example, can cause a multitude of symptoms, including calmness or even rapid heart beat. Beans, when not soaked properly before preparation, can cause gas and bloating.
So, first off, check your diet. You could be intaking something that is causing problems with the secretions released for proper sleeping. It doesn't necessarily mean the food item is bad either, by the way, but it could mean it reacts oddly with your body chemistry (which could just be caused by the fact that it's processed, not organic, or just not fresh).
It could also be a lack of a vitamin, mineral, or basic nutrient. Make sure you're taking a proper vitamin each day. You don't have to go crazy with the supplements but a basic multi should help keep things more balanced.
It could be drug related. If you drink a lot of caffeine, alcohol, or consume other drug items (marijuana, various pills and medications, etc) then it could be a side-effect that has just now come to surface. Sometimes it takes the body a while before it will show symptoms of distress. If you're using then it might be time to stop. If you're on a bunch of medications then it might be time to talk with your doctor about making a few changes or adjustments to the routine.
Next watch your stress levels. Try to do some relaxation before bedtime. Staying calm and relaxed should help your body prepare for sleep. Try not to worry so much over the little things like this particular sleeping issue. Remind yourself that most things will eventually pass and so don't stress over them too much. It may also be helpful to resolve current conflicts in your life, and change abnormal routines you've recently gotten into.
Watch what you put into your head. If you're watching scary television shows, reading scary books, and venturing out to scary films then you're probably going to have scary thoughts. When the mind relaxes and the brain calms then thought patterns can become jumbled during sleep.
Burn you energy throughout the day. Many people find that their sleeping issues diminish when they get into a healthy exercise routine. It helps the body relax later in the evening. It helps burn off stored fat and energy. It helps the body heal, grow, and maintain itself. It can lead to natural balancing of hormones and secretions. It could simply be time for you to begin a healthy or healthier exercise regimen.
I wouldn't jump to sleeping pills, natural or synthetic, right now at all. It's entirely too early into this issue for you to seek outside assistance. Watch yourself and make appropriate changes. If the problem persists for a couple more weeks then talk with your doctor and see if they can provide some further guidance.
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Ok im pretty sure I have vaginitis I am currently in a tiny island in the caribbean with no good medical care and no option of leaving until january...Does anyone know how i can cure this..or where i could order a treatment? (link)
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There is everything from douching with an apple cider vinegar solution, to spraying the inside of your vagina with a GSE and distilled water mixture.
Your best bet is to see the doctor though. I know that something you want to hear but you won't likely cure yourself completely. The leftover mess can wind up creating infertility, or something called pelvic inflammatory disease.
If you're wanting to still see a doctor in January but try some self-treatment in the mean time to cut down symptoms then I highly recommend CureZone for natural treatment and remedies. There is a great support forum where you can receive knowledge answers from people who have deal with this female issue. Here is their step-by-step guide to curing vaginitis naturally:
http://curezone.com/dis/1.asp?C0=357
Here is a forum where you can ask further questions on curing vaginitis at your home:
http://curezone.org/forums/f.asp?f=776
Personally, I would try my best to find professional health care there. A bacteria overgrowth is nothing to hope magically goes away on it's own. Infections can lead to serious complications and future problems.
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Ok so the other day i had the scariest dream... i dreamt i cut open a persons brain and fried it for my brother and sister to eat the whole time dreaming it i was gagging and i was also doing it in real life... i ended up throwing up and choking on it while i was still sleeping... later that night i dreamt someone was trying to kill me one of the guys were my boyfriend any ideas why i am dreaming wierd dreams? (link)
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It could just be in association with Halloween. When you watch television, movies, or just walk through a store you pick up these sorts of images. When you're asleep your mind can run wild and think of all sorts of things. Even if you weren't consciously thinking about brains before you went to bed, the image may have popped in from something you've seen recently on packaging or during commercials.
It doesn't mean you're a bad person or that you have some cruel intent on hurting another person. It just means you were asleep. Our minds know that dreams aren't reality and that they are all make believe. As creative individuals, sometimes our minds just piece a bunch of nothingness together to create some fantasy time as things are jumbled. During the night, the brain rests more and, thus, ideas can become a little twisted.
I wouldn't be too concerned over it at all. There are much odder dreams a person could have. For example, when I was little I had a reoccurring dream that I went to a circus where everyone and every thing was dead (skeletons, zombies, ghosts). It didn't mean I wanted to even see that sort of thing, and it didn't mean anything more. I had just seen an advertisement for Halloween goodies and had talked about the circus a few days before. My brain went a little haywire and the thoughts got jumbled and voila. A dead circus. It meant nothing, and most dreams never do mean anything, in reality ;)
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There was a tragedy that had occurred at my school recently due to terrible acts of bullying. I am one of those people who has a big dream to change the world. Starting with my school. Every week, my friends and I want to do something nice, anonymously, to make my school smile. Last week my friends and I wrote phrases on note cards (keep smiling, you are an amazing person, you have a beautiful spirit, you have a heart of gold) and taped them to all 1800 lockers in my school. I want more ideas. I actually need more ideas. My school needs to get closer as a whole and we all need to love each other, I know its a long shot but one can dream. So, any ideas would be much appreciated! (link)
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This is a wonderful, terrific, awesome idea. I am so glad you have made an effort to brighten the lives of others. So few people take time out and just try to cheer another person up or bring a smile to a face.
What about things like:
Free hugs. During lunchtime a few volunteers will stand in an area (accepted by your school, of course) and have a sign displaying the offer of free hugs. To get the ball rolling, have your friends, who aren't volunteering at the time, cover over for a quick hug.
Peer therapy. When I was in middle school our school started a peer one-on-one session so that students could come to the office during lunch and talk with someone their own age about problems. The "therapists" were OK'd by the principal and they were given a set of guidelines about how to handle some situations (ie: suicide, violence, abuse, etc.). The "therapists" did sign a form that said they'd keep everything confidential, too.
Free candy, bracelets, pins, pens, or other goods. You can find many, many websites who sell these items in a large quantities for extremely low prices. They can customize them to have a short phrase or saying on each of them. "Just Smile," "You're Loved," "Make a Difference," etc. sayings would be acceptable. Hand them out to everyone, leave them on desks, and stick them to lockers.
Seniors help freshmen. In my last year of high school the principal decided that seniors could help a new freshmen find his/her ground in the new school. Seniors could sign up to become a "big student" to help the "little students" figure out how things worked. This, of course, works well at the beginning of the school year. The seniors and freshmen exchanged phone numbers, email addresses, and further contact information with their "buddy" and connected with each other once a week to help encourage good behavior and answer basic questions.
Food drive. Collect canned goods for each other. If someone has a tragedy occur, send them a box of food. This is particularly good for people who have their homes burn down.
Thank-you notes. Everyone likes to be thanked. "Thanks for being nice," "Thanks for caring about others," "Thanks for brightening my day," "Thanks for just being here" notes are good suggestions.
Awesome phone call. Allow students to sign up with their phone numbers to receieve a friendly phone call once a day (or once a week) for a set amount of time (a week, a month, 2 months, 3 months, or whatever you choose). Call the number each morning or evening (before or after school) to say, "Hi. Is [PERSON] there? I am calling just to let you know that you're an awesome person. I hope things are going well with you. Have a great day and keep smiling! Bye for now." This is actually going over big for a website right now ( http://www.awesomereminders.com ) but it would be a lot cheaper if you had enough volunteers to do it yourselves.
See if your principal can dedicate a wall in the school (lunch area, perhaps) to the students this year. See about adding motivational sayings there for everyone to see. Even the words, "I love you," matter. Other good ones: Everything Happens for a Reason, Hang in There, It Gets Better, Care About Others, Stay Strong, Reach Out. You can do this in big, bold letters in paint or even stickers.
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how do i make myself cum? (link)
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It's really as simple as doing what feels good.
Try a few techniques. Find out what feels pleasurable. To be quite honest, there is only "so much" you can do by yourself, so, eventually, you should run into the magic spot or technique that just does it for you.
Everyone is different. This means we can't really say, "Do this and this and see great results!" Some women can only reach orgasm through internal stimulation. Some women can only reach orgasm through clitoral stimulation. Some women need both of these areas stimulated. Some women can reach orgasm through other methods (such as through nipple play).
Experiment with your body if you're seeking to begin masturbation. That's the only way you'll truly find out what works well for you.
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I did a horrible thing, when I was 19 or 20; I let my ex-husband talk me into sleeping with another man, to spice up our love life. It was one-sided - he just wanted the "power" of "sharing" me. I was just a young and confused kid.
That was 17 years ago. I know now that my ex abused me sexually and mentally all that time. We divorced 5 years ago. I finally got away from him...
The problem is with the man I let him talk be into being with. I began an affair with him; it lasted more than ten years. He was married; I was married. We fell in love. But he was twenty years older than me, and I had young children.
The affair ended soon after the marraige. He ended up telling his wife about it; because we had started to do drugs, and formed an association - after a while we did them every time we were together, but we only did them when we were together. The lines became blurred - we didn't know if we were getting together to see each other or to do the drugs. We knew we loved each other before the drugs - but after we brought that into it, it became a destructive relationship. Where before, it had been an absolute secret, and was an escape - for both of us- him from a sexually dysfunctional and negligent wife, and I from a sexually abusive narcissist husband. I'm not saying it was right - just that it was positive for us at that time in our lives. The drugs killed all of that.
He told his wife about me because he needed help getting away from the drugs, and he knew that to do that he had to get away from me. The association was there and once it was there, it couldn't be erased.
I knew this too, and knew we had to get away from each other to stay off the drugs. The difference is that I divorced my husband. Without him, my "lover", I guess you'd call him, to tend the wounds, I could no longer live with the sexual deviancy my ex-husband forced on me.
Now it's been six years since that all happened. I'm remarried to a man who treats me like a queen - and I love him dearly. My ex is completely out of the picture - and I haven't talked to my "lover" either. I know from other sources he's off the drugs, and so am I.
I'm very VERY happy with my husband. He's my best friend, I love him, he treats me right, and he loves me.
Why do I still miss my lover? So so much that I can't describe it. I'll see something or I'll hear something, and the memories will come back - weekends we spent together, things we did, the absolutely perfect sexual compatibility and comradarie we had. It comes back to me and I just feel like I'll dissolve into misery at the thought I'll never see him again. I *know* we can never be together again - once the drug association was made, we couldn't get away from it. He loves his wife - I love my husband. He's twenty years older than me!! I don't understand why - six years later - I'm still crying over losing this guy on a pretty regular basis. He always treated me with respect - even at the end, he did everything he could not to hurt me. We parted on good terms. I think that actually makes it harder.
I don't think there's an answer out there for this one. But maybe someone can help. (link)
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He was your "out" of reality. He was your temporary escape. He was the white to your black situation.
It's the same reason why people fall in "love" with their therapists. They see an escape from the cold, cruel reality they face in a warm, friendly face that treats them well when it feels like nobody else does. A warm, friendly face says, "Hi. Can we talk about you for a change?" after spending the past week being belittled, beaten, and abused by their partner. It just seems so much nicer then.
The feeling should eventually pass once you realize that it honestly, truly was not the person you were in "love" with during those hard times. It was the passion, the escape, and the warmth. It had nothing to do with him, in particular, other than that he was not abusive (or, at least, not abusive in the same manner as your spouse).
When you're in a situation where you are, for example, beaten regularly by a person who you are suppose to trust and who is suppose to take care of you then the kind people you meet each day seem just a tad more kinder than they would have if you never had to deal with a bad home life. You may really enjoy your job then because you get to interact with these "extremely nice" people. Years later, once the beatings have ended and you move past that job, you may recall fond memories of simple things like sitting and having lunch with a coworker. You may miss the job, even if you disliked the actual work involved in it. Heck, you may even realize that the only reason you stayed at the particular position was because it was your daily escape from the reality of home.
It's the same as the dog that gets tortured by it's owner but is thrilled to see the neighbor, who gives him loving pets when they cross paths. The dog may end up sitting at the neighbor's fence, whimpering for more affection. It's the dog's escape. That person is particularly "nice" because the dog can only compare those actions to the ones it gets on a regular basis by another human being.
It seemed so great because the other side of your world is something that was cold and cruel.
I know it sounds very harsh to say, but anyone could have taken the spot of your former lover and you would have sought them out years later because of positive memories that resulted. Things just seemed great with that person because it allowed you to be with someone who did not abuse you. Some people even get into a situation where they are, for example, mentally abused by their spouse but continue to run to their lover, who is physically abusive. It's just that the other person doesn't hurt them the same way and, for just a moment, there is a complete relief of that sort of pain.
Seek a good therapist. With everything you have gone through, you should be talking with someone on a regular basis about your feelings and your history.
Don't let it cross your mind to connect with your former lover. There will always be that "savior" bond if you never get to come to grips with the fact that it had nothing to do with him being a good guy. Connecting with him, even through online means, can cause a lot of difficulties that you don't want to have to go through.
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Here is my old SAT score:
Critical Reading 580
Math 570
Writing 510
Multiple Choice 54
Essay 6
What would be my composite score and how would you figure it out? (link)
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It requires simple addition, my friend.
Simply adding:
Critical Reading + Math + Writing = SAT Score
Yours is:
580 + 570 + 510 = 1660
Your composite score is just the entire score together. Usually colleges will ask for each section score separately, but, of course, some colleges will ask for different, more specific, scores.
Your SAT composite score is simply just made up of the three basic scores (Critical Reading, Math, and Writing), each ranging between 200 and 800. You add these three scores together to get a score between 600 and 2400.
The multiple choice score is a number between 20 and 80, and your essay score is between 0 and 12, but these numbers are not added into the basic equation to formulate your SAT composite score. These numbers are just provided to give you more information about your performance on the test, actually, and are typically not required to be disclosed to any college, university, or educational institute. Essentially, they are meaningless if you have no desire to improve.
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I am a 65 year old male that doesn't know much about sex and relationships so I thought I would ask and maybe try this once to see if it was appealing to both of us.
Is it better to stimulate the clitoris with a finger or through oral sex with the tongue? (link)
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Different women enjoy different things.
Experimentation with your partner is your best bet. You can ask her what she thinks sounds best and go from there. You can try out both of the above methods and then ask her which she finds more pleasurable.
Some women don't enjoy this sort of stimulation at all.
Some women only enjoy this sort stimulation.
It's up to your partner to tell you which is best for her. If you're comfortable with doing either act then try both of them out and get her opinion on the matter. Then you know what she likes and you can do what is more pleasurable, or work on improving the techniques so that she is pleasured by both acts.
Communication is always important, even when it comes to bedroom antics. Having a healthy sex life means talking with your partner about their likes, dislikes, desires, wants, and needs. You can share ideas and are able to spice things up a little more, if you so desire. You're also able to help fantasies be fulfilled or find new developing fantasies you two can share and indulge in.
There is no right or wrong answer to this. There is no this or that answer. There is no yes or no answer. It's all up to your partner and what she finds to be more appealing and arousing.
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i am from india me n boyfrnd were making out a month ago with full clothes. i touched him n he masturbated then. he ejaculated some semen on his hand. he dint touch me. i immediately send him to wash it off. would i get pregnant. my periods are late (link)
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If the ejaculatory fluid did not come in contact with your genitals then it's very rare that you could get pregnant. Since he did not touch your vaginal area with his hands wet with semen then you are probably safe. Washing the hands will wash away semen.
Pregnancy happens when semen gets into your vagina. The sperm can swim up into your uterus (womb) and make you pregnant. You have to have the sperm, at the very least, touch your vagina to be able to swim into it and make you pregnant.
Your clothing was on.
He did not touch your female genitals.
He washed his hands directly after ejaculation.
You are probably not pregnant.
Your period may be late due to stress, change in eating habits, lack of exercise, or a hormonal imbalance. If your period is very, very late then you should consult with a doctor to make sure everything is healthy and normal.
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The first time giving my boyfriend a blowjob, I got awkward & stopped for a few seconds. For those few seconds he began to move his penis back & forth with his hand. Like kind of shaking it. Do you know why he would of done that? Did I do the whole "blue balls" thing on accident, or what? I just want to know for future refrence. (link)
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The truth is, it probably just felt good. You stopped mid-sex-act and he wanted to remain aroused so that you could finish doing what you were doing when you were ready again.
When the girl stops it can be a turn-off. If a guy focuses on, "The girl doesn't want to continue?! What is going on?! Why did she stop?!" then things can go soft. Staying aroused is obviously important if the girl is going to finish doing what she was doing in just a moment.
And sometimes guys do things like that just because it felt good at the time. Maybe it's just what he does when he's to a certain point. Just because you pulled away for a moment doesn't mean his entire sexual desire disappeared and his genitals are no longer present. He's still turned on and still wants to get off.
"Blue balls" is going to happen if he doesn't get off. The ejaculatory fluid will begin to move forward to be released and, then, suddenly, the arousal period is stopped (girl pulls away, something happens, someone stops doing something, etc.) The genitals go soft and the ejaculate cannot be released, forcing it to slide back into holding. The body then absorbs that excess fluid that was going to be released. Things are then, of course, a little sore for a short period of time until the body handles what it needs to handle and reabsorbs some of that fluid. If he "finished" in the end then chances of him having "blue balls" was fairly slim. "Blue balls" is, simply, when the guy doesn't get off during a sex act session.
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I've always claimed to be a Christian, and I do know some basics like everyone does.
However, for the first time tomorrow I am attending Sunday school and a service. In the past I had just prayed and the like at home. I'm honestly a bit scared, because I know I don't have as much knowledge as I should. It's so hard for me to remember everything.
I don't want to be completely lost in the Sunday school lessons, so can anyone help me by giving me quick lessons/things to read that most people would expect me to know? (link)
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Relax.
Sunday school and church services are only to help you understand Bible passages. Nobody will think lowly of you because you don't recall some of them. As a matter of fact, a good church will be open to your questions and be quite glad to give you the right answers or lead you on the right path to God.
Going to church doesn't make you any more or less of a Christian than the next person. If you're not comfortable in a particular church then that's alright. It doesn't mean you're lying about being a Christian if you choose not to go to church. There is no commandment that requests your presence in a church setting every Sunday. God isn't going to think you're a fake just because you choose to not go to church or not go regularly.
It's great that you want to learn more though. Church is so that you can understand the Bible better and meet other Christians who you can feel comfortable around.
The problem here is that many, many short versions of Bible passages cut out really important details. You don't get the full gist of what is going on then. You miss important facts you might have otherwise picked up during service or during your own reading.
I, personally, recommend you to simply open up a KJV Bible and read for yourself. When you stumble onto something you clearly don't quite grasp then you bring that up with your church. "I was reading this passage last night and I had a few questions..." or "I was reading this passage last night and I didn't really 'get' what was going on. Can somebody help me out?"
Anyone who thinks lowly of you for seeking God in scripture probably doesn't understand the passages themselves. Don't be afraid to ask questions. Don't be afraid to say, "Wait...I don't know that passage. Could someone help me?" Don't be afraid to open the Bible up for yourself and read. Take initiative. Many people find reading a passage or two every night before bed helps them to better understand the entire Bible.
Think of all of the elderly men and women who attend church services. Many of them have long forgotten certain passages. Nobody ever thinks they are not real Christians or that they are dumb for not remembering what happened in a previous passage. Nobody is going to think badly of you either, and in a good church they can really help you understand what is being taught this week in lessons.
Think of all of the new persons that come to church services. Think of the newly saved people who have never opened a Bible before in their lives. Think of the drug addicts, prostitutes, uneducated, mentally ill, and the other people with misfortunes who are still warmly welcomed to service. They might not know anything at all but the congregation is willing to help them, teach them, guide them, and love them anyway. It doesn't matter if you go into service not knowing a single word of God--you're still welcomed and loved. You will still be taught. You will still get guidance. Nobody will laugh or think you're "stupid" or any of your other fears.
It might help to contact the pastor of the church before you attend. If you're going specifically to Sunday school then you may want to get in contact with the teacher. Ask them what is being taught this week and how you can prepare for services. They can pinpoint out some scripture that you might want to brush up on by reading the Bible, and not a brief version that might leave out key details you'll want to know. They might, also, have smaller lessons available throughout the week to help you better understand scripture.
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If you're going to tell me that this is wrong, stupid, immature, against God's wishes (I'm an Athiest) and/or to be myself, please don't respond.
There is this girl that I really dislike in school. She is fake and very annoying. I guess you could call her my "frenemy" in a way. We're friends and be talk but I secrety hate her. How can I make her jealous? (link)
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You be the bigger, more mature, person and move forward without them.
You've, seriously, asked this very question at least 6 times now. You're beginning to obsess over this sort of thing. Please, reconsider your actions.
Based on other questions you've asked, you sound like a nice enough girl. Why you willingly want someone to dislike or even hate you is beyond me. Once one person begins disliking you other people tend to follow. Others see your actions and say, "Wow, that nice girl isn't so nice...hmmm...maybe I don't want to be her real friend after all."
Wanting to hurt someone, physically or emotionally, just because you feel "you can" is pretty wrong, stupid, and immature. Adults don't behave in this manner and neither should you if you want respect from others, especially adults.
While you can:
Ignore her
Flirt with her crush
Give her wrong answers (tests, homework)
Not invite her to parties
Give her the wrong directions to parties
Invite her over to a sleepover and not be home
Tell her that her crush wants to talk to her
Tell her crush she likes him but is [nasty, sleezy, a tramp, etc.]
Give her a piece of clothing that looks terrible on her (but tell her it's great)
None of it is going to really matter. You're only doing yourself wrong. I know someone who was tossed around by who he thought was a friend and still, 20 years later, talks about how much his feelings were hurt that the person didn't come out and say, "Hey, I really just don't want to be your friend."
Nobody likes to be bullied. Nobody likes bullying. Making someone jealous, hurting their feelings, or, excuse me, "crushing your enemy" is similar to bullying.
With 6 questions on this very subject, I think you're going entirely too far. You're older than 13 and you should know better than want to take revenge all of the time or hurt other people. It concerns me that you feel this is justified in your head.
Have you thought to seek counseling to resolve these sorts of hidden feelings and resentments? It's alarming that you continue to ask the same question, in a different format, over and over again. Being in the psychology field, this sort of activity screams that you have some serious mental health issues that need to be sorted out before you grow older.
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I'm just curious, how do you know that birth control is working on you, and how do you know it failed?? (link)
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You won't ever know if the birth control still allowed ovulation to occur within the cycle. I, personally, know women who have gotten pregnant even though they took their pill every single day. My older sister has actually gotten pregnant more than 3 times while on the birth control pill.
If you take the pill regularly, on time, and in a routine then the chances of failure are still fairly slim.
Nothing is 100% perfect. Nothing. Nothing is 99.9% perfect either. We're not lab rats. We're not in clinical studies. We eat different foods each day. We are under more stress some days than others. We suffer from headaches, tummy aches, and regular aches and pains from the real world work. Sometimes we exercise more or less than other days. We're not robots.
I know it isn't what you want to hear but you'll know it isn't working for you if:
Your period comes while you're taking the "active" pills in your pack.
or
You become pregnant.
There are no other signs or symptoms. You cannot even evaluate your cervical mucus for signs and symptoms of ovulation while on hormonal birth control pills since it alters that.
Our bodies were made to reproduce and it's hard to get them to do something opposite of nature. Nothing is fool-proof or perfect. Sometimes it just fails.
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I have windows 7. How can I turn a picture into a stencil or a coloring page to use for a pumpkin carving? (link)
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Well, I would suppose this could be quite difficult to achieve; however, I did find some very informative pieces that could help you turn an image into something creative to carve on a pumpkin.
Here is:
How to Turn Any Picture Into a Pumpkin Carving Stencil Using MS Paint:
http://www.ehow.com/how_6002283_turn-stencil-using-ms-paint.html
Custom Pumpkin Carving, Stencils for Halloween:
http://www.suite101.com/content/custom-pumpkin-carving-stencils-for-halloween-a145678
Me On A Pumpkin v2.0 Software Download Purchase $14.95:
http://www.carvingtechnologies.com/meonapumpkinandcopyv20stencilsoftwaredownloadonly.aspx
Order a Custom Pumpkin Stencil:
http://custom-pumpkin-stencils.com/faq
Pumpkin Carving Stencil Software and Carving Patterns:
http://www.canucarve.com/
Turn Photos into Stencils with Picasa:
http://picasa.google.com/
Beyond that, I couldn't give you personal tips. I've only carved a pumpkin, like, once and I'm pretty terrible at it. I apologize for not having a specific set of ideas to hand you but I do hope that the links presented above will do a good job at helping you out this Halloween when carving your own pumpkin.
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17/f.
I just never seem to meet anyone. I know so many people that are always seeing various guys, but my love life, for the majority of the time is pretty much non-existent. I always kind of think that someday someone will come along, but I've been thinking that for years and it hasn't happened. It's not that I'm unattractive - I receive a lot of male attention, and am always told by guys that I'm very attractive. But I just never seem to meet anyone that amounts to anything.
Which places would you say do a lot of guys hang out? And what are the kind of places where everybody mingles and gets to know each other? I feel like wherever I go, I don't really mingle with anyone, and if I do, it doesn't turn into anything else. I'm also quite shy and I don't really know how to approach guys. I'm often told I appear cold or initimidating, which I think maybe stops guys from approaching me, so what are some ways of looking more approachable and of approaching guys?
So yeah, just how to meet guys, really? It seems like there's no guys around, but there must be! (link)
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Meet guys in places that you're interested in.
If you're a big reader then spend extra time in libraries. Watch who frequents, who checks out books that also interest you, and who is simply attractive. Strike up conversation about the reading material. Make suggestions, gather suggestions, and exchange introductions at least.
If you're into socializing then clubs, bars, dances, and other gather zones might be interesting. Do the same thing. Hang around. People watch. See who might be interesting. Strike up conversation. Meet them.
It goes for anything from rollerblading to hockey. From the internet and web design to gardening.
If there is no centralized location for these sorts of people to enjoy their hobby or interest in then there is a group. Trust me. There is a group for anything and everything. So, you take the initiative and join the group. This could be anything from book clubs to baking groups. You meet people who are interested in the things you are interested in. You have something in common right off the bat. Conversation comes quickly and easily then.
"Hey, that looks like a great book. I thought about checking it out. Since you're returning it, could you tell me how you liked it?"
"Oh, wow, what is that you're drinking? I just had an [drink] and it was tasty but that looks even better."
"I see you've been in this art course for awhile and I really admire your work. I love this particular piece you did. Maybe you could show me your techniques sometime?"
"I love music and heard you play last Friday night at this cafe. It was really beautiful and I think you're talented. Could you tell me how you learned to play?"
And then, later after conversation has been created, you make introductions:
"Oh, I'm so sorry, how rude of me. My name is NAME. It's nice to meet you and I'm glad I noticed you and thought to speak with you tonight."
Really, if you go after guys who you don't know anything about first then you are starting on a very plain ground. He may absolutely hate your favorite hobby or most fascinating interest. If you meet guys who are already into what you're into then you already have something in common and something to discuss right away. It's really, really as simple as that.
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Let me start off by saying I'm 17 a female and have never had any signs of Asthma...So now, for about maybe 2 weeks now I've been having this horrible wheezing, shortness of breath and cough that starts up immediatly after I sneez.
I've been taking "Adult Robitussin Cough & Chest Congestion," but it seems to help only mildly.
I've also had this recurring cold for about a month now, runny nose, stuffy nose sore throat, coughing and cold chills at night...I've been taking plenty of vitamin C in all forms Oj, supplements, and I've been consuming veggies and fruit like crazy. But that's a usual thing that's been going on for about 4 years now. Just a personal change. (link)
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You can, most definitely, be diagnosed with adult-onset asthma. Many adults end up having asthma. It can be spurred on by various things, including illness, smoke inhalation, poor diet, or even odd allergies.
Speaking of allergies, they can also come suddenly, out of the blue, and for no cause. You may suddenly become allergic to, for example, wool. You start looking around find that, for example, you have a wool blanket you sleep with. It could be anything.
So, while we can't really give you a diagnosis, I can say you're making the best choice by seeing your doctor. They can take a look over your lungs and see if something is going on. Like you say, it could be anything from a simple chest infection, bronchitis, pneumonia, asthma, allergies, cancerous lesions, or even tuberculosis. We can't do chest x-rays, listen to your lungs, or even take samples if required so we aren't able to give you a proper diagnosis.
If you smoke then you should cut back, and that includes being around people who smoke. Eating healthy and getting enough nutrients and vitamins (take a daily supplement!) is great. Beyond that, we're just not doctors and we can't get hands-on with you even if we were :(
I wish you well and hope the doctor finds something easily treatable. Hopefully all of this clears up shortly for you.
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I am 19 years old. My husband is 23. We have 3 children. The problem is we fight all the time. If i try and talk to him about stuff we just stop talking he wont say anything to me and he says it is because he doesnt want to argue. At night he ignores when the kids get up so that i always am the one the get up with them even if i have the flu or something i have something wrong with my stumoch and i have to have an ultra sound done he told me i am not going if it is going to take a long time because im not going to sit there and wait. he doesnt work when or if i get him a job he works for like a week then quits I feel like he hates me it bothers me he hardly showers he doesnt brush his teeth or wear deodarant but i love him. Is this a normal marriage or am i just pretending its normal. (link)
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You shouldn't just up and leave the guy or give him some crazy ultimatum like you're the only person that matters in this marriage. Many times ultimatums are just as one-sided and immature.
You need to sit down and have a mature, one-on-one, adult discussion with him.
He may be feeling overwhelmed. Not many 23 year olds are married and raising 3 children. He could be depressed or feeling neglected himself.
It could be that he has no idea what duties should be his. He may no have any idea what his role should be in this sort of partnership. If you're aggressive and always take the plunge forward first then he may be sitting back saying, "Well, if she's doing all of this then...wow, I'm completely worthless. I don't know what I can do to help..." It's enough to drive a person mad, sometimes, and it isn't anyone's fault. It just happens. Sometimes some people need a set guideline of things they need to accomplish, even.
The truth is, you aren't ever going to know what's really up if you don't open your mouth. No screaming, cursing, ultimatums, scare tactics, fighting, bickering, finger-pointing, or anything. A normal, adult discussion about a serious matter.
It's time to talk with him and see if you can come to some sort resolution. Tell him you feel like things are one sided many times. Tell him you think that the way things are going will end up destroying your marriage before long. Tell him you're worried for your partnership because you love him and you want to make things work but you're simply not happy.
Suggest you two seek marriage counseling.
You need to let him know that these things, the exact things you wrote here, bother you. I highly suggest you go as far as to print off this very question you've written here and take it in to the counselor with you. If he never knows there is a major problem then he cannot change or try to fix the issue(s). He isn't a mind reader and neither are you. You have no idea what is going through his head.
Therapy can help if you're both willing to work on things. Your husband may be mentally ill and not want to divulge his dirty little secret to you that he's feeling overwhelmed, stressed, depressed, or at the end of his rope. For you and him both, the past few years sound like they have been fast-paced and hectic. He may just be scared to suddenly wake up as a grown adult with a wife and children.
So, sit down with him first and have a discussion. A serious discussion. Ask for his attention for a period of time. Spill the beans. Tell him you're unhappy and you are thinking this sort of marriage isn't normal. Tell him this isn't what you want in a marriage.
Tell him if you want to salvage things before they go completely sour. Encourage him to help you fix this marriage. Seek a good marriage counselor together. Make the phone calls. Seek help.
Do not, DO NOT, just walk away. That isn't how adults handle these situations. That isn't mature or honest. You have to try. You made vows and you can't just pretend you can overlook this sort of broken promise by walking out of the door.
Talk with him.
Find help.
If things cannot be resolved then you know you at least tried and gave it your all. It could be as little as a few months and you could see complete changes. You could see a whole different man after some therapy together. Or maybe you'll see that you made a bad decision in being partners with this man. Everything will come out, eventually, but it's up to you to give this marriage a chance before kicking him to the curb. He's human, too, and sometimes we don't do the right things when we don't feel good about ourselves or our situation.
23 with 3 children and a wife is enough to scare any man. It's enough to weigh on you. It's enough to suck you into a depression and make you feel worthless or hopeless. It's enough to cause you enough stress that you cannot cope with a steady job. It's enough to merit therapy.
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So my husband and I started trying to have a baby a week before my period started, then i got my period on monday, ended friday and we started trying again on saturday, is it to early to take a test? thanks (link)
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Well, this is entirely too early to test. If you test like this then expect to be throwing serious cash down the drain.
It takes about 7 to 9 (or more) days for implantation to occur after initial fertilization.
It takes another few days, to a few weeks, for the pregnancy hormone to build up within the bloodstream to create an accurate reading from a home pregnancy test.
A woman is usually most fertile mid-cycle. Many women can only become pregnant during ovulation.
To figure out when exactly you ovulate you can purchase over-the-counter ovulation predictor kits from your local store/pharmacy. You should monitor these results for 6 months straight to get an accurate idea of when your body usually releases an egg and is at the optimal fertility peak.
If you have no idea when you ovulate, and have no desire to dish out even more cash for a 6 months supply of ovulation tests, then you should wait until a missed period before testing.
Ovulation, for most women, happens mid-cycle. For a 28-day cycle this should occur on day 14. I, myself, am not even a "typical" woman though. I ovulate much later, around day 20. There's no way to know other than taking the tests though.
So, if you were "typical" and ovulated on day 14 and your egg was fertilized on day 14 then there is, at least, 7 to 9 days before implantation will occur. hCG is the pregnancy hormone that is released into a woman's bloodstream when she is pregnant. It can take up to another 2 weeks for that to accumulate enough in the woman's body before it can be detected on a home pregnancy test. A blood test can get an accurate read sooner though.
So, you're looking at having a fertilized, implanted egg at around day 23 of a 28 day cycle, at the very earliest, but not even being slightly detectable until about 7 to 9+ days later. It'll be another few days, to a few weeks, before enough hCG builds up in the system to be noticeable.
Around this time you should notice your period missing if you are, indeed, pregnant. The body doesn't have it's usual drop in hormones to say, "Alright, shed the uterine lining!" so there should be no blood. In rare instances a woman may very lightly bleed for 2 to 3 days during implantation.
So, hold off on testing until you actually miss your period. You should be charting your periods so that you know when to expect them, when your predicted ovulation day is, and when your period might be deemed late. When your period is a few days late then you can take you first pregnancy test. If it shows a negative then wait 1 week for your period, and if it doesn't show, test again.
For some women, hCG will take weeks to build up so test once a week if you stop having periods. When I was in high school I had a friend who consistently tested negative throughout her entire pregnancy, for whatever cause. She knew she was pregnant, by the obvious signs of a growing tummy and other bodily changes, but found that the home pregnancy tests never worked for her. She ended up having her pregnancy verified by a blood test in a doctor's office.
In short, yes, this is extremely too early to start testing for pregnancy. Wait until your period misses, give it a few days, and then begin testing. If the test shows (-) then wait 7 days for your period to show. If your period still does not show then you may test again, and thereafter until your period shows or once every week. Any more than that, you're just wasting your money.
If you have ANY fertility questions then please feel free to send me an inbox question. I've done quite a bit of research on fertility and conceiving. To be quite honest, studies show that you have only about a 20% chance of getting pregnant each month if you're a healthy couple. Most couples conceive within 9 months time of trying while others end up waiting 10 years for their bouncing bundle of joy.
When you're trying to conceive then it's very easy for the body to get run-down, over-stressed, or just try too hard. You should be having sex once every 3 days for maximum fertility (it gives the man's body enough time to produce health sperm). Take your prenatal vitamins NOW before even getting pregnant. Take care of yourself. Reduce your stress. Don't smoke. Eat right. Love each other.
If anything I said above was too complicated I will try my best to simplify it. For many women, the body is a complete mystery and all of this new information can seem overwhelming. If I came off as confusing or unclear then please let me know and I will rephrase.
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Does anal sex make you lose your virginity? Like is there a possibility, that a guy's penis can slip from the anal opening and enter the vagina and like pop your cherry? Or is it impossible since they are completely different openings?
Also when you start doing anal sex, it's usually very small the anus opening, so is it possible that the whole penis can fit inside like it does in the vagina? and does it affect the size of your butt in any way?
Sorry i'm asking too many questions, but I really hope that whoever replies can give me full information and really help me,not brief answers. Thankyou so much. (link)
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Yes, you can have your hymen broken during anal sex by the penis accidentally slipping from the anus into the vagina.
Anal sex carries a lot of disease risk. Think of it this way:
A homosexual male gets AIDS but doesn't know it (his test doesn't show positive yet--sometimes these things take years before they show positive for infection)
He has sex with another male.
This, typically, means he puts his penis into another man's anus.
He transfers the AIDS to the next man through that sort of intercourse without even knowing he had an STD.
Are those gay men virgins?
Even though they had anal SEX and contracted a SEXUALLY transmitted disease?
Anal sex is sex. Sex brings a lot of risks. It can spread deadly diseases fast and you might not even know it for weeks, months, or even years in some cases.
There's no way to know if your partner is 100% disease-free unless you went to the clinic with them when they got their STD/STI test. Many clinics won't even test for some diseases like herpes without your specific request. Then, even at that, there is absolutely NO test on Earth that will tell you if your partner has any of the over 100 strains of HPV (and, by the way, if you got the HPV vaccine shot you're only "safe" from 4 of those strains). Anal warts is probably something you don't want to deal with.
Anal sex can very well transfer illnesses. It's important to always be picky when choosing a sexual partner. Always use condoms so that your risk is lowered (you can still contract STDs though). Get a full STD test every 6 months and require all of your partners to do the same thing.
Take care of yourself, most of all. This is your body. This is your life. Don't destroy it right away by doing something stupid.
You can contract STDs by engaging in ANY form of sex. You can get them from vaginal sex. You can get them from anal sex. You can get them from oral sex. You can even get them by masturbating other people in some cases.
Among the diseases with which anal sex is associated are HIV, anal cancer (seriously), typhoid fever, and various diseases associated with the infectious nature of fecal matter or sexual intercourse in general. Among these are: Amoebiasis; Chlamydia; Cryptosporidiosis; E. coli infections; Giardiasis; Gonorrhea; Hepatitis A; Hepatitis B; Hepatitis C; Herpes simplex; Human papillomavirus (HPV); Lymphogranuloma venereum; Pubic lice; Salmonellosis; Shigella; Syphilis; Tuberculosis. Using condoms will decrease these risks; however, they do not protect 100%.
Physical damage to the rectum and anus are serious and hemorrhoids, anal fissures, and rectal prolapse may occur. Damage is more likely if communication is poor or if technique is clumsy; condoms do not help protect against this sort of damage. Basically, if you don't know what you're doing or you end up doing something wrong by accident you may end up in the emergency room having surgery or stitches too.
Small tears that can happen during anal sex can easily become infected. The membrane inside the rectum is VERY thin and fragile so it tears very easily. Even if there seems to be no complications the tears can be very irritating and can become inflamed later on. It doesn't matter how "gentle" your partner is, your will probably suffer some tearing and possibly even some bleeding. It can also become uncomfortable for you to pass a stool afterward.
It is also very easy to get a vaginal infection from anal intercourse if your partner enters the vagina after being in the anus. Even if he knows not to enter the vagina afterward, he may accidentally slip. The infection would be bacterial can actually do major damage to you--rendering you infertile. Really, anal sex is more likely to result in an infection than vaginal sex would.
Incontinence has also been reported from engaging in anal sex. Basically this means that the anal sphincter loosens up from the activity. This also means that anal leakage can become an issue for the receiving end. It also may mean the inability to completely control your bowels when needed.
The sperm (semen, ejaculatory fluid, or cum) is NOT what carries the disease. It's the penis itself in many cases. So, even if your partner pulls out and does not cum inside of you then you still are at a very high risk to contract infectious diseases.
The anal opening will enlarge from the sexual act, just as the vagina stretches after engaging in sexual acts.
And, for a note, look at this image and think how far apart the anus really is to the vagina:
http://www.drmichaellau.com/images/labiaplasty.jpg
Seriously, it isn't that far away and slippage is very, very common. If the thrust is "in the moment" then fecal matter can be pushed quite far into your vagina and a bacterial infection can start. Even if you were a "virgin" to begin with.
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