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sticky situation
im 18/m. I had a gay realtionship about a year ago, and it went on for about 6 months. Im now tired of guys and im with my girlfriend. I really should tell her that i was with this guy, she has no idea that i was. She even knows the guy. How can i tell her w/o her finding out who it was, and will she leave me if she finds out?
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I know you're always taught not to lie but I really don't think you should tell your girlfriend because I, myself, am a girl. And for one, I wouldn't like the idea of my boyfriend having a gay relationship with anybody, especially if I knew the guy... gross. Well, don't tell her... unless it's just EGGING tou to... sometimes you get carried away like... you're afraid that if you tell her, she'll dump you and if you don't and she finds out anyway, she'll dump and if she never knows about it, you'll feel guilty for not telling. Either way it's bad. If it's bothering you bad, tell her but say it was some years ago. Try to make her understand. Best of luck!
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even tho telling your girlfriend about your pastlife is sometimes a good idea i dont think you should tell her because i am a girl and if i were her and i found out that my boyfriend had a realtionship with a guy then i would dump him straight out flat!
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Well the thing is no matter what she will find out and if you love her you will tell her and she might leave you and might not I'm a girl and if you told me I wouldnt but then there are some girls that would leave you
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Why should you tell her you were with this guy? Is it going to strengthen your relationship? Most people have really bad prejudices against bisexuality. She may very well start fearing that you are going to leave her at any time for a guy. It's a ridiculous fear, but a lot of people think that way. Hopefully, you already know that there was nothing wrong with you having a relationship with another guy, and you have nothing to be ashamed of. Yes, honesty is important in a relationship, however, you do not have to know everything about each other's past relationships. Has she ever asked you about your past relationships? Has she ever asked you if you've ever had a sexual relationship with a guy? If she did ask, and you lied, that's a problem. Sometimes, people feel compelled to tell their partners everything about every past relationship and sexual experience for the sake of being honest. Maybe this is something about yourself that you want to share with her. But really think about why you are telling her, and how telling her is going to be good for your relationship.
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dOn`T tEll HeR!!!
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hmm.. This is tricky. If i was in your girlfriends shoes. I would want to know about your past relationships (whether it's a guy or girl). Honestly i would be more curious as to why you were in a gay relationship then and now your in a straight relationship. If she is a good girl she might be upset at first because you didn't tell her. But i think she will stick with you, if you have something good going (in your relationship). I mean if you were expiramenting that's understandable. Lots of people expirament. As for her not finding out who it is. That's going to be tough since she knows him. I'm sure one of her first questions are going to be 'who was he?' Your either going to have to tell her the truth. Or keep it as simple as possible.
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the solution to this whole mess is to stick with one sex
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Unfortunately if you tell her that you were in a relationship with this guy, she will most likely find out who it is in the long run no matter if it's through the grapevine or through a close friend. I do believe that you should definately tell her because trust is the most important element in any relationship. Try setting up a time to make dinner for her at your place and break the news then. If she leaves you then it wasn't meant to be in the first place. I hope everything goes well and best of luck.
xoxo
//hannah
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If it was me, i would defiantly want to kno if my b/f was gay. She might leave u, but wouldn't u rather have that then u lie to her? And wut if she finds out before u tell her?
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you needa tell that girl
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if u tell her its over
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I dont know how u should tell her but if she really loves you then she shouldnt leave u.
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Secrets hurt. If she trust you, TELL HER. That can really put a dent in the relationship. What ever happens happens. Try to expalin it to her in a way she will understand. The worse that can happen is her leaving you for not being honest with her.If she really cares and understand you, it will be a shock, but it will be a bigger better shock if she finds out. Things happen for a reason, remember that.
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if i was her i would wat to no! and if she really has feelings for you it wouldnt matter to her! personally i think that you should b straight forward with her even if she says like eww and doesnt talk to you for a few days i think that it is worthit! just dont drop names of anyone and just b straight forward!
HOPE I HELPED!
~MICHELLE
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You can tell her if you want to - all in all, it's not an absolute must to further your relationship if you don't feel you need to tell her. However, it's always good to get these things 'out of the way' in the beggining of the relationship so that everythings out in the open and the two of you can jump and dance around the fields of blissful togetherness.
A good way to tell her is to just simply bring up past relationships, and mention that you had a long-term relationship with another man. There's no shame in that, and really if it bothered her, that's not a very good sign, anyway. When/if you do tell her, she may be curious as to who it was. If you tell her who it is, (and this is totally up to your judgement) she may feel uncomfortable around that person sometimes, especially if she's with you. The case would be the same even if your past relationship were with a woman. Another option is to tell her that it doesn't matter, and that the other person may not want you to give names. This all depends on your situation.
I'm sure everything will be fine. Everyone has had past relationships, this shouldn't be hard for either of you.
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Ask yourself--
Do you want to tell her because she NEEDS to know for the sake of the relationship, or do you want to tell her because you feel guilty and can't forgive yourself and want to have her forgive you?
Admitting up to something like that can be an act of absolution if you aren't happy with it yourself. Do you need to make peace with that, or is it vital that you tell her this?
How does she respond to news that most people would find shocking?
How much do you need to tell her? It could be that all you have to do is say "I had relationships with guys in the past, but now I want to be with you".
And of course, remember, you can always just keep your mouth shut and avoid all this.
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Okay, I wouldn't leave a guy just because he's bisexual, or because at one point he was gay. Tell her you have something important to tell her, and it'll be better if she finds out from you. She might think you're cheating or something, but when you break the news that you had a boyfriend, she'll be relieved, or atleast most girls would be. Tell her that a while back you had feelings for a guy that you both know, and that you were even together for 6months. And you want to be honest with her, and you think that she should know. She'll probably be curious, I know I would.
You don't want her to find out who it was. Then say that you don't really want her to know, and that you feel that you can't share that much.
If she really cares for you then she won't leave you. And if she does. then I'm sorry. But good luck telling her, and if you need any other help, let me know!
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Trust is the key to a healthy relationship... the best thing to do is tell her... cuz one way or another she will find out... & its best if she hears it from you... & i also think its best if u tell her who u were with... if she truly loves you... she wont break up wit u over that... & if she does break up wit u... than dont worry... you'll find sum1 who truly cares about u...:)
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Your girlfriend might need awhile to adjust to the idea that you were in a gay relationship, but if you treat it matter-of-factly, she SHOULD be able to deal with it ... particularly if she really cares about you.
Make sure to let her know that you are only interested in dating her at the moment and that you find her attractive - this'll help with any 'competition' worries she might have about losing you to a guy.
I think it would be enough to speak in general terms if you don't want her to know who your ex was. Just say you were in a gay relationship - use no names. Your sexual history is intensely personal and it is up to you how much you share and how you share it.
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no don't tell her then she will like dump you
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The sooner you are honest with her, the better. If she really likes you she won't leave you for being with a guy. It's possible she might ask who the guy was so you might have to tell her but I do suggest telling her ASAP. The longer you keep it to yourself, the greater the chance of her not being too happy about it.
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I really believe that your sex life needs to remain private. It is not necessary to tell your current partner about your past ones unless there is a health risk involved. If you have been tested, after ANY relationship, boy or girl, and are disease free, than it really isn't any of her business, to be honest. How would your friend feel, anyway, if you tell her about your past together. He may want you to keep that under wraps. I find it is always best NOT to discuss your past partners.
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everyones life is different. but just casually bring it up one day. then just tell her bout it. it's in the past. but u can't be in the dark wid her bout it. if she asks who it was then tell her. but if she doesn't then don't tell her.
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Well i think you need to tell her if she is mad well tell her it was in the past and that you both had to forgive eachother for the stuff you guys did. Dont worry about if she finds out or not cuz she need to understand that you are not gay anymore and that you want to be with her. Hope i helped sorry if i didnt.
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Just be honest with her fella and tell her wot the do is...And as for eggyolkenema is concerned mate seek advice for drug rehab and learn to speak English not Gangster because you sound like a right MONG!
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you can tworry about if she finds out. bcos in a relationship, you both have to be understanding. if she leaves you becos of a little phase you went through, maybe you guys shouldnt have been together in the first place.
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