crazyme6's advice column

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Q: I aboslutely cannot stand my family. My brother annoys the crap out of me and I always get really mad when he's around. And my Dad is just like him, but worse. My Mom and I get in fights every day about the stupidest things. I can never be around my brother and Dad for more than 5 minutes at a time or I get super annoyed or really pissed. They know what they're going is annoying me and pissing me off, but yet they just keep doing it. More and more. They make fun of me, gang up on me and do whatever else they think of to piss me off. I've honestly gone to the point today of breaking down and crying in my room for hours because of them. I just can't handle it anymore. I don't like them. At all. What should I doooo?

First of all, you have got to sit down and talk with each of them. Your family cannot be changed, and having a good rlelationship with your family makes life so much more fulfilling. I know its hard, but they really do love you and sometimes all it takes is just actually venting to each other and being like "look im sick of you guys ganging up on me, i wanna be able to spend time together adn not piss each other off" try to find similar interests. support, listen, just try to only see their good qualities. talking to them about it will make a HUGE difference.

Q: well i have been going wit dis boi for 6 weeks and i love and i wanna have sex wit him so bad what should i do help me pleze

IF you have to ask, you already know the answer. wait. sex is so important, dont just throw it away.

Q: ive always noticed that tanning beds give you kind of an orange looking color though...id rather have a real golden tan!also tanning beds are worse for your skin.they cause skin cancer alot quicker then the real sun.

how is that a question?

Q: I have a problem... like without using girly names i need some other names to call my boyfriend by instead of saying hun all the time. He has so many names for me but i become dumb founded when it comes to callin him something because everything else sounds so girly ( like sweetheart or baby) if you know what i mean? I really need help!

haha i have the same problem. try "love" like "goodnight love!" or "handsome" sounds gay but its cute to say "hellooo handsome" or "babe" is good too. babe isnt girly.

Q: i been with my gf for 10 months and 8 months ago i spoke to my ex through email but it didnt mean anything..she asked me how i was doing so i answered back saying im doing great and im happy with my current gf..and then i asked how she was and she said the same..me and my ex were just dating for 4 months it wasnt official or anything so when we she broke it off cuz she wasnt happy we spoke rarely afterwards,she just wanted to be friends..so i tried getting back together with her after we broke up i met her for lunch a couple times tried to get back with her i tried kissing her it didnt work i was just a real jerk..so my final email with her was me apologising to her how i was a jerk..well my current gf found out and now she dont trust me because she has had previous problems like this..she thinks i still talk to her behind her back but i told her so many times i dont want nothing to do with her..so now she wont even talk to me or nothing she said she wants her space to figure things out..but i think we should discuss things and work it out...i just need advice..my question is what should i do, what advice can you give me?

show her the emails to prove it didnt mean anything, and sit her down and look her in the eyes and tell her that you love her and could care less about your ex. i wouldnt suggest emailing her anymore, even though its not anything bad, your gf just needs some reassurance ya know?

Q: How do you get an emo boy to like you if your only half emo and half prepy?

SCREW LABELS! just be YOU. i dont believe in the word "emo" because we're all emotional and theres no such thing as"half emo and half preppy" you are who you are, we all have a wide variety of personality traits that make up one unique amazing person and all you can do is jsut be yourself and approach him and talk to him as often as possible.

Q: Ok well im only 13/f and i get the feeling that i like NEED to have sex or something. is something wrong? and is there a way to "please" or 'fufill" this feeling?

nothings wrong, its definetely just puberty. but trust me, do NOT go out and have sex just because youre feeling these new things. you want to wait until you are way older and with someone who loves and respects you. you can "fulfill" the feeling by touching yourself as everyone else said.

Q: i have a really bad relationship with my parents. i yell at them all the time and they yell at me. we fight constantly about stupid things. i feel bad about it and i want things to be better, but i dont know how to fix things. any advice?

well, if you want things to be better you definetely do not hating them. and the first step would be to stop saying you hate them, and realize that they brought you here and have done all they can to love you and raise you the best that they can. teenagers and adults constantly butt heads but they really honestly do know what youre going through. my advice is to write down the things you love about them and think about the things you are thankful for that they have done for you. and tell them each day that you love them and when you feel a fight brewing, just take a deep breath and try to end it. try to get to knwo them as the people they really are instead of just your parents. find out about their past, their opinions, spend some fun time with them. youll find youve matured alot once all the fighting stops. just tell them how you feel and try to work it out the best way possible. parents will ALWAYS listen!

Q: ok i am going on a blind date should i ahve sum of my firneds come with me or not incase it goes badly and so i will have sum one to hang out with instead ir what

nope. just tough it out, if it sucks, dont worry itll be over by the end of the night! if it starts to get bad, just tell him you have to go home soon so you wont get in toruble. bringing a friend makes it awkward though, it could be a great one-on-one date.

Q:
My girlfriend ask me a question like this

" Baby you know that i love being in love with you but sometimes i get a little nervous that one day you'll fall out of love with me so just be honest with me and tell me something."

How can i keep your attention and interest?

Then she imply's " You say you will always
love me but what will keep you in love with
me? So tell me and i'll leason.

We've been together for seven years now. Don't
get me wrong we've had our up's and down's when
didn't see each other for a year. Doing the
years of break up's and makes up's she dated
another guy while i was single.

I just want to knoe what would make her ask
this question wheni tell here almost everday that i love her.

she knows you love her, but she is scared of losing you. its COMPLETELY normal. tell her this: sweetie, (or whatever word you choose) all you have to do is be you. i'll always love you no matter what.

ONLY SAY IT IF YOU MEAN IT but i know that if my boyfriend said that to me i would smile to ear to ear.

Q: 16/f. I love looking at myself in the mirror. And it's weird..because I'm not cocky and I'm not confident. But I'm like...self obsessed I guess. I spend about 30 minutes in front of a mirror before school. Everything has to be perfect. Sometimes, I'll just stand there and observe my features...and admire them. I also take a LOT of pictures of myself. SO many that there's not enought memory in my computer to store them all! And it's funny as well...because I've never had this problem before. Going through middle and elementary school, I could care less what I looked like. And in middle school and early high school, I had really bad acne problems and so I kept my face hidden from half the people half the time. Now, however, since I got a boyfriend this year and since I lost weight and began looking "prettier" I look at myself too much. I'm afraid this will develop into a serious narcissistic problem. It might already be. And it's interfering with my schoolwork...even though school's over - because I spend more time looking at myself in the mirror and fixing my hair and face...than actually taking notes in class! I don't know what to do. My face is beginning to clear up more (I'm on Accutane) yet ..what if the problem gets worse when my face is near flawless? I'm not conceited AT ALL. I don't come off that way. I just never had the confidence..and now it kinda shows..and I actually like myself for once. How can I manage this? Keep it normal? ...Ahhh.

i went through the same thing about 2 years ago. i finally started realizing i was pretty and i wanted to look at myself all the time, i always had mirrors out in school and would even look in window reflections to see how my hair and face looked. but guess what? this will pass, and it can actually be great because you are developing confidence. youre admiring your features instead of putting them down, which is good. BUT, on the other hand, obsessing over flaws and trying to make sure everything is perfect isnt healthy. its great to look in the mirror and like what you see, dont let that go away, but what you have to do is gradually stop looking in the mirror as much, and just every day stop yourself from the over-obsessing. being comfortable with yourself and confident at the same time is the best thing in the world. once i got over my worrying, i felt so much better. now, i feel beautiful all the time and know that nothing can ever be perfect. you dont have to be flawless to be beautiful, it comes from within. just love yourself as a person and realize looks are not the most important thing, and every day keep busy and focus on more important things, and eventually youll be confident but without the obsession. hope i helped!

Q: there is this boy who i flirt with a lot and whenever we hang out with a group of friends that group always talks about how we should go out which makes things really awkward and they also dare us to kiss each other but i don't want to do that yet.

how can i handle being put in that situation?

people are so rude sometimes. i hate when friends try to make things awkward. don't give in to anything youre not ready for because of peer pressure. stand strong and just say something like "do you not have anything better to do..i dont see YOU kissing anyone" or if you dont wanna do that just blow it off and change the subject. if you begin to like the guy and want to start a relationship, thats your choice and NO ONE elses. dont let them get to you. and maybe try just hanging with him alone if you like him. good luck!

Q: okayy here the thingg..
I was with my boyfriend last night
and he sat me on top of his lap..
Then he started tickling me so I
started wiggling around on his
lap. Then he started tickling me harder
and I noticed he had a weird expression
on his face and his leg was tapping fast..
plus he would constantly pull me higher onto
his lap and start breathing hard..then
start tickling me again..
What is he trying to do?
Is he horny or something?

haha yes he definetely is. you were moving around on his lap which probably gave him an erection. guys get erections over the SLIGHTEST things, and hes obviously very attracted to you. im glad he respects you though, and just kept tickling you and didnt try to do anything. how long have you been with him? have you ever kissed or anything?

Q: Does masterbating affect you in any way?
I do by rubbing my vagina on my bunk bed pole and kissing it.
Can this affect me..

you can kiss your own vagina? you must be a contortionist of some sort.

anyway, it gives you pleasure and relieves stress, thats the only way it affects you.

Q: well ive been single for a really long time and,im only 15, i know. i decided to sign up on a dating site, well this guy i though was really cute he's 24yrs old, i think thats an ok age so he asked 4 my email and were chatting, except he lives in korea& on his site theres only 1 pic do you think i should trust him,and believe he's what he says he is? also umm..do you think online realtionships work out??and can you actually call them a realtionship even though you cant see them>??

no, no, and no. not a good idea AT ALL! its completely unsafe, the age difference is way too much, and internet is NEVER a way to trust people. internet relationships are useless. relationships require getting to know somebody in person and knowing who they are and trusting them and them trusting and respecting you. please dont do this, he could be a pedafile and its a very bad idea. you'll find a boyfriend your age when the time is right, someone who lives in your town and you can hang out with and trust. be patient and just be careful okay? internet is a scary place.

Q: At parties and things, i always feel im just there.
All my friends end up kissing boys, and getting with people, and im ALWAYS just there.
Also, im never the girl the boys flirt with its always other people.
Im not the prettiest of all lasses, and its really starting to affect me, as i thought buy the age of 15 i would have had atleast one boyfriend, or made out with someone more than once.
Can i do anything to change alot?
xxx

you dont need to do anything to change, besides learn to love yourself. loving yourself completely is the best thing you can do in life. first of all, youre only 15..you have ALOT of time ahead of you for those special things to happen and the longer the wait, the more exciting it is. making out isnt important, and as for boyfriends, its better that you havent had a whole bunch of meaningless relationships, because when you get your first boyfriend its gonna be so much better. plus, they may be kissing boys, but that doesnt mean theyre any better than you or that thats anything to be jealous of because its not meaningful when its just random guys at parties. what you need to do is everyday think about the things you like about yourself and remind yourself that you're unique and NOBODY will ever be like you and you can do anything you want with your life. if you have the right attitude and confidence, anything can happen. love who you are, be who you are, enjoy life and don't worry because everything thats meant to happen for you will happen when its supposed to. i'm sure you are beautiful and feeling beautiful makes such a difference. hope i helped.

Q: Basically, I was stabbed in the back by an ex-girlfriend long after we broke up and stayed friends. And I'm tired of being slanderized for no reason when I go out of my way to avoid her every day of my life.

So, how can I get back at her in a way that's legal, and not going to cause true harm (like pain or death)?

I know I want revenge, but I want it with honor.

revenge never works. the best thing is to COMPLETELY ignore her and show her youve moved on with your life, or the cycle is never gonna end.

Q: 15/f
been with my boyfriend for 2 years,
he was my best friend before boyfriend.
i'm starting to argue with him alot more, but about stupid things. when we broke up once, i felt horrible and incomplete. how do you know the difference between loving a boyfriend and a boy bestfriend?

the main difference is the attraction. if you find yourself always wanting to kiss him, thinking about what could happen sexually, if you feel butterflies and just generally wanna be near him always, then thats romantic love. it also includes qualities of friendships like being comfortable, trust, alwyas having a good time..but if youre in love you would know..its like you cant see yourself being without them in the future..you want to be with them all the time and love them no matter what their faults are. i hope i helped

Q: So i'm pretty much the typical good girl but i've recently been talking with a guy in my english class who is the opposite of me. He uses drugs and skips classes, and there are many rumors going around about him all the time.
I didn't expect him to be a frequent reader of philosophical novels... we discuss ayn rand and many other topics in our english class and i'm kind of falling for him.
the thing is, all my friends hate him. i love my friends a lot and i wouldn't want to hurt them by getting too close with this guy.
what can i do?

1. dont believe the rumors, his life is a mystery to everyone besides him because people make up EVERYTHING.
2. get to know him!! one thing i have learned is reputation doesnt matter and if youre falling for someone, dont let anything hold you back. he may not even be into drugs anymore and everybody has their faults..if anything you could help him get clean. he may need someone like you to help him turn his life around but if you have alot in common then definetely go for him. forget the words good girl & bad guy and just let love work its way. this could be something great and im sure hes a great guy at heart..most drug-users just have gone through alot but really are not bad people at all in fact theyre alot more creative.

Q: i usually have trouble starting striking conversations with my GF and i need help like avoiding akward silences or breaking them or just shownin my GF i care help?

ask questions! girls LOVE to talk about themselves.

bio

hey all you pretty people out there.my names susan but i love to spell it Soozin..im passionate about helping people and making people laugh and just being weird..i believe that anybody has the power to change the world and love really is all we need. ask me anything you want i love this site its kickass!