Annieisonfire's advice column | Annieisonfire's Advice About Love Life

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Q: What do guys think of girls watching porn? is it a total turn off or on? or neither?

In a way it doesn't really matter! You can do what you do in your own time and if he doesn't like it then its tough!
Women are just as entitled to watch porn as much as men and they might find it a turn off for men to watch it but it doesn't mean you should stop, it's not illegal or abnormal so as long as your comfortable with it, it doesnt really matter if a guy is turned on by it.

hope this wasn't totally irrelevant and helped in some way.

Q: why do people enjoy giving head? just the thought is gross. first of all, i think it's gross if i had to suck someone's fingers, but sucking someones cock, that just seems gross. no i'm not young, and i'm not immature, but it's kind of repulsive thinking of people getting on their knees and sucking on someones private area when god knows where it's been and then having cum go into your mouth. um ew! i don't get it. why do people enjoy it? and if you have done it, how gross really is it? is it as gross as it seems?

it isnt so much as gross as it seems. but it just depends on how clean ur guy is... my guy washes his penis and so giving head is often good... however it is sensible to consider "where its been" before sucking!
hope this was useful
ttfn

Q: Sorry if this is long..

13/f
Ok so i went out with this guy who was 2 years older than me. Im 13 and he is 15. But in fedruary ill be 14 so we'll be one year apart. Anyways when i went out with him he kept asking if id do anything more than make out with him and i said no because im 13 and thats too young for me. I said in the future i would. but after a while we broke up and we both agreed to it because we wernt seeing eachother a lot and we went to different schools so it was hard. So we were over. And he got new girlfriends and i got new boyfriends but he kept telling me that he still had feelings for me and always would. And i didnt know what to really say about it because i was kinda mad at him for some reason so i would never respond. Well one day i wanted to get him jealous because i was so mad at him, so i knew he wanted to do "stuff" with me ( more than making out ) so i told him one day when i was babysitting there was this guy there that was soposed to go out but his plans got cancelled so he was stuck home and i didnt have a ride home so i stayed there, and i told him that while the baby was sleeping we were in his room fooling around and i gave him head. Then he was really jealous and admited it so my plan worked and i was very happy. But on New years eve he was over because his cousin mom is friends with my mom but anyways while he was over we were like all over eachother and laughing and having a good time and also we were sharing drinks and stuff. And when he was about to leave he hugged me for a long time and then we kissed ( we didnt make out ) and another thing when i first kissed him which was a while ago.. sometime last year he didnt know that he was my first kiss and im afraid to tell him because i dont want him to be my first everthing. So my question is should i tell him or just keep it to myself because i feel like he might be really mad that iv been lieing to him. what do i do. and im sorry this is so long i just really really need advice soon :[

thank you so much :]

i think that you should just tell him the truth. tell him just as you have told us. if he understands then he is worth it if not then you shouldnt need to worry about him again. you may think you really like him but telling him the truth will let you know if he likes you enough to do stuff with him.
good luck
hope this helped

Q: f/17
so liked this guy.
he used me as a rebound girl
went back to his ex
is now dumping his currnet g/f (his ex)
and tells me that using me was the biggest mistake of his life and that he wants to hang out with me again to hopefully lead to a relationship,
what should i do?
go back to him because i just got over him and now he tells me hes sorry.
ahhhh

i would use him too... upset him, give him a taste of his own medicine.

however, if you really like the guy tell him that you will take no shit from him and maybe try and have a relationship with him. I mean, he is human afterall we all make mistakes. Just make him wait a bit, see how much he really wants to go out with u. he could be just using you because he know he can get you.

give him a chance but dont dive in to it head first

good luck xxx

Q: How do I tell my very very very best guy friend that I love him?

He has a girlfriend. But hes the only person who acts like they actually care and tells me he loves me and says Im amazing. Ive said "I love you." A lot, but.. how can I explain to him that its more than just I love you. How can I say he means more to me than the world?

-when he says i love you... look confused and say, well i love you too but you have a girlfriend.

-ask him who he thinks he might be goin out with if he wasnt with his gf (worked for me ;-))

You just need to ask him questions every now and then, not explicit ones like "DO YOU REALLY LOVE ME?" or "YOU ARE TOTALLY AMAZING"
be a bit sly and clever about it, you can get information about his feelings by asking neutral questions like, hows things with u and your gf?
Once you have enough info, say that you think hed be better off with someone better suited to him!

Or see if hes jelous when you tell him that u really like "this guy"... then you will know if he really does like you in that way

love is used in so many different contexts its hard to know what kind of love he means, until you find that out you can then make it so that he knows you feel the same way!

if you want any more help just email me or talk to me on msn

pixies_are_fun@hotmail.com

i know its long but i hope it helped xxx

Q: ok so i really like this girl. but there is a problem, she is my friends ex. everytime im with her it feels right. we kiss and hold hands. but somedays she acts all weird, like we dont have a "thing". does it sound like she is using me to you?

She's probably just insecure. In my experience girls are more scared of commitment than boys! Thats not how the media presents it but i know we are terrified!
She could be "using" you, but what has she got to "use" you for?
It's probably just that she thinks its special too but she wont admit it.
All the advice i can give you is dont get too attached because you dont know to what extent she is scared of committment. Just move at her pace.
Hope this helped
xxx

Q: So I have a guy friend that I've been close with for pretty much all of high school and had an on/off crush for him. Well, I recently broke up with my boyfriend, partially because of this guy, but he doesn't know it. I just feel really close with him and can tell him everything. We just have this chemistry where we feel comfortable whenever we're together.
Just a few weeks ago, another girl told him that she likes him, but he doesn't really want a long term thing with her. I talked to him about it and he said he might hook up with her though because he figured there was no one else interested. I wanted to tell him that I like him but I just feel like it's too soon for him to have another girl friend say she likes him. We're graduating soon and I'd figured I'd tell him then but he's already taking this other girl to prom and I feel like I'll lose my chance if I don't let him know.
The other thing is that a lot of people in our grade have been asking if we're going out lately and it just makes it harder for me because by reinforcing to other people we're not going out, I keep saying to his face "No, I don't like you...we're just friends" when that's not really what I feel.

Could someone just help me figure out if he likes me or not and if I should let it go or tell him?

I think that the chances are that he will feel the same way about you as you do with him. The same thing happened to me and now i am currently dating this guy, theres nothing to loose, if it spoils your friendship then it obviously wasn't that special.
Just go for it, you will be so much happier knowing where you stand with him
good luck hun
XxXx

Q: 17/m
well, theres this one chick. and shes hot. but thats besides the point. i like her and i THINK she likes me, but she doesn't want to date. she told me some crap about how shes bad with relationships and she wanted to be fwb. I was all like...um, idk. so now were just sort of like...more than friends but less than other stuff...that whole thing. and the other day she told me that she was going to be all protective of me and stuff. and to me, thats like...WHAT THE HELL!? cause its like, you dont want to date me, but you dont want me dating anyone else. so idk what to do, because I really want a relationship. i tried telling her this but she just told me that she's bad with relationships.

She seems to be messing you around to be honest. If i was you i would go with the flow, it sounds to me like you are in a relationship but its just hard for her to handle. She may want to be in a relationship but doesn't want the responsibility of it, just act natural around her and build upon your relationship for a few weeks before bringing up the subject... If she still doesn't want a relationship you need to tell her that it's important to you and that you want to find someone who cares about you enough to be in a relationship, if she then still doesn't want to be in a relationship then she obviously isn't the one for you.
Good Luck Hun
XxXx

Q: ok i just started going out with this guy yesterday and today at school he was seriously CLINGY and he said he loved me at the end o the day i was so freaked out how should i act around him what to i say cuz im not even sure if i like him anymore PLEASE HELP SOON 5's for anyone who helps at all

Tell him your not ready for such a serious relationship yet. If he doesn't understand break up with him, its the experience game when ur at school, ull know you don't want to be with him in the future and you dont need someone clinging on to you when your just wanting a bit of fun. Good Luck hun.

Q: me and my best guy friend have been friends for a long long time. he let me know that he has cared about me for a while. i like him too and told him that. we are going out now. but i dont want anyone to know right now. only because i broke up with my ex a lil while ago because i was apparently all over my new bf. so it would be bad to have this get out right now. my question is... is this a bad sign already if i dont want to know about my blossoming love.

No. It might be a good sign, that you care about this relationship so much you don't want anything to upset it already. A secret relationship can be very exciting and make you all the more eager to be together which is cool

Q: Ok i got this girl a purse and wrote her a poem
should i put the poem in the purse and then give it to her or give her the poem then the purse.

Put the poem in the purse. It'l be a nice supprise for her.

Q: My boyfriend and I have been together for two years. He always compliments me and is very good to me. My problem is that I feel funny undressing in front of him and I can't wear sexy nighties in front of him. I have a very low self-esteem. When I look in the mirror, I see fat. I want to be able to wear sexy things for my boyfriend and feel good about myself. What can I do??

I think that you should buy sexy underwear or a sexy nightie and look at yourself in it. I mean really look at yourself, be truthful! Your obviously not fat and if you are then your boyfriend totaly digs it so just go for it. Sexy underwear is designed to make you feel and look sexy, and it works. Don't worry about your weight though, you just need to find a way to be confident with yourself. Get your boyfriend to help you by sexy underwear shopping! Its a great thing and you never know, it could make your self-esteem much higher!
Good Luck hun... your gorgeous so make the most of it!

Q: If I'm on my period, and I have a tampon in, what should I do if, while making out, my boyfriend starts to put his hand down my pants? Should I assume he is going to finger me, and immediately warn him that I have a tampon in? If so, what/how should I say it? OR should I let him do whatever he is going to do, and then IF he DOES begin to finger me, should I THEN tell him to stop? Thanks for your help.

I recon when u have a tampon inside you you probably wont be as horny, plus the fact ull be on your period so it wont be as plesant for him, just tell him. Other wise don't let him put his hands down your pants until your period is over.
All my love
Aunt Annie

Q: how do you get a guy to like you? does it take friendlyness outgoingness or just being a slut? please help i rate!!!!

Just be yourself. The right guy will like you for YOU if he does. Don't put a face on to impress guys, its fake and they don't like that. Don't worry about it, theres no rush, plenty of boy time left.

Q: i have this boyfriend, and he's my first, but sometimes it feels like i see him as just a friend. i like him but i dont think i like him enough to be in a committed relationship with him. i really dont know what to do because i'm not happy about this but i also dont want to hurt his feelings

The best thing to do is to tell him that your relationship feels more like a friendship. Life is too short and you don't want to waste time with someone who you aren't all that in to. He could feel the same way? You wont know until you say something about it.

Q: i like my stepbrother A LOT 13/f he is 14 but what do i do"???

Well, its perfectly normal to have these kind of feelings for your step-brother, its not incest if your mam or dad had nothing to do with the making of him. He could be a little wierded out though so if i were you i would leave the idea of you too together in you head, if you do anything about your feelings it could make your life really difficult. Just try and be friends with him, you never know... he could like you too!
good luck hunny

Q: 13/f i like this guy lets call him coby who never talks to me at school because he is really popular but at hebrew school we flirt and talk and laugh. He is the "speedy type" who is only 13 but has had a blow job and i really want to be speedy to. Should i ask him out and does he like me??? what should i do because i dont want to make a fool out of myself? i rate high!

Hes not worth the bother hunny. Your only 13, im 16 and i wouldn't do anything of the sort for a boy who doesn't bother talking to me! I think you need to find someone else and tell him where to get off when he flirts with you. I don't believe that people have had a willing sex life with him, its just one of those boys who will lie to get more popular with his friends and you will just be another notch on his "speedy" bed post.

Q: ok heres my question....

I HAVE BEEN DATING THIS GUY FOR THREE MONTHS NOW! HES A GOOD GUY AND ALOT OF FUN! HES VERY POPULAR AND HAS ALOT OF "EXPERIENCE." WHEN I MET HIM ALL HE TALKED ABOUT WAS HOW BAD HE WANTED TO SLEEP WITH ME AND HOW BAD HE WANTED TO HAVE A LIFE WITH ME! I FELT THAT SAME WAY BUT THE ONLY DIFFRENCE IS THAT IM STILL A VRIGIN AND HE DOESNT KNOW IT YET! AND TO MAKE THE STORY MORE INTERESTING IVE BEEN HAVING FAMILY PROBLEMS AND GOT KICKED OUT OF MY HOUSE AND NOW STAYING WITH HIM! WE SLEEP IN THE SAME BED AND WHEN HES IN THE MOOD I FEEL SO BAD BECAUSE I TELL HIM THAT IM NOT IN THE MOOD OR I FEEL SICK BUT THATS NOT IT AT ALL, SO HE JUST ROLLS OVER AND GOES TO SLEEP!I FEEL LIKE SUCH A HORRIBLE PERSON! IVE LIED TO HIM SO MUCH ALREADY AND THE PERSON THAT I MET HIM WITH AND HE WANTS A LIFE WITH IS THE ONE THATS NOT A VIRGIN! IM SO SCARED TO TELL HIM BUT IF I DONT HES GONNA THINK THAT I DONT LIKE HIM AND I DO I REALLY DO! WAT SHOULD I DO? IF HE FINDS OUT I LIED TO HIM AGAIN HE MIGHT THROW ME OUT INTO THE STREET! pls help! and my tonight cause hes gonna try again and i dont wanna lie to him anymore!

OK. Tell him the truth!!!! I recon he will respect ur honesty when you tell him, if he's good enough for you then he will understand, then he will know why you haven't wanted to sleep with him! I think it might be a relief for him to know the reason why you haven't wanted to sleep with him, because of you not him, then he can be more gentle with you and you can have fun together.

Q: okk so this guy i like asked me out yesterday :-D yea exciting! soo anyways..today at school i felt like i was shy around him..i dont know why cuz im usually soo loud! i want to act like i usually do around him..cuz we were really good friends so he knows how i am...and i also want to be a good gf by talking to him and acting like a gf!
welllll any advice for anyy of this stuff!
thanks.!

Pretend you don't go out with him when your together! You will feel more relaxed until it sinks in how to be a gf to him
good luck

Q: What are some REALLY good tips on flirting? Like I want to start to make my boyfriend really interested in me. Like I already know he likes me but i want him to show he likes me. So I need tips on flirting and stuff like that. Thanks in advance! =)

Getting on your hands and knees when picking things up should drive him CRAZY. Making lots of eye contact and loving yourself, if ur confident with the way you are he will find u all the more attractive.